this post was submitted on
1,295 points (53% like it)
9,650 up votes 8,355 down votes

funny

subscribe2,715,413 readers

8,171 users here now


Results of the facebook poll


Reminder: Political posts are not permitted in /r/funny. Try /r/PoliticalHumor instead!


NEW! No gore or porn (including sexually graphic images). Other NSFW content must be tagged as such


Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress. Try /r/politicalhumor instead.

  • Rage comics - Go to /r/fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).


Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.


If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators


The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.


CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

top 200 commentsshow all 310

[–]mrpeach32 212 points213 points ago

Most likely sitting on the toilet reflecting on how much of an idiot I am for eating that whole damn plate of buffalo wings.

[–]newfag_tr0ll 74 points75 points ago

Yep that was me this morning. Twice. And it burned with the fire of 1,000 suns.

[–]Mister_Meowgi 35 points36 points ago

The afterburn is the worst... Sitting down has never been so painful.

[–]TJ5897 51 points52 points ago

See the thing is my asshole never burns.

I just have to deal with the worst pains in my gut ever.

Indestructible rectum but a weak stomach

[–]seriouslyyyy 74 points75 points ago

There's a gay joke in there.

[–]ian21 28 points29 points ago

Something something cum dumpster.

[–]TheInternetHivemind 13 points14 points ago

Something something repeat exposure.

[–]Look-over-there1234 0 points1 point ago

Something something dark side. Something something complete.

[–]pdmcmahon 8 points9 points ago

There's a gay penis in there

FTFY

[–]feared_rear_admiral 8 points9 points ago

you had me at penis

[–]PJL 9 points10 points ago

I'm sure he did, rear admiral.

[–]Gooberpatrol66 1 point2 points ago

TIL penises can be homosexual.

[–]PerfectlyDarkTails 1 point2 points ago

TIL Vaginas can also be homosexual.

[–]evilted 4 points5 points ago

The afterburn is the worst.

Also known as "ring sting."

[–]cephalgia 7 points8 points ago

And it burns, burns, burns....

The Ring of Fire

[–]falcon_from_bombay 4 points5 points ago

Fellas, please never try Indian food if even buffalo wings give your rectum a million degrees heat. Indian food burns you both while going in and coming out!

[–]NothingsShocking 1 point2 points ago

Thai food too. Fucking papaya salads and house tom yum noodle soups and kra pow.

[–]Gooberpatrol66 0 points1 point ago

Dat Curry.

[–]my_name_isnt_clever 0 points1 point ago

Pepperoni pizza with red pepper flakes for me. Ow.

[–]akatherder 1 point2 points ago

I might recommend wiping after each salvo when you're on the pot. I don't know if the mechanics/biology pan out, but it seems like the longer is sits on your o-ring, the more irritating it is in the long run. It's a great time for baby wipes too.

[–]Northumberlo 0 points1 point ago

Probably because the acid is exposed to your soft rectal skin and is starting the slow process of eroding the surface.

[–]Gooberpatrol66 1 point2 points ago

False. Spiciness is not caused by acidity.

[–]oberon 0 points1 point ago

I'd bet that longer exposure still makes it worse, though.

[–]IsThatYourBed 0 points1 point ago

sounds like a question for /r/shittyaskscience

[–]Octavian0 0 points1 point ago

Literally shitty.

[–]vedder10 0 points1 point ago

They call that having the ole "Johnny Cash"

[–]PuP5 0 points1 point ago

aloe vera.

[–]GFandango 1 point2 points ago

for the sins of our hand, the sins of our tongue

[–]pdaddio2239 0 points1 point ago

The difference between getting mild and hot sauce on your Chipotle.

[–]camall 0 points1 point ago

ring of firee...

[–]Daxx22 0 points1 point ago

Fountains of Fury.

[–]Gpr1me 0 points1 point ago

I fell in to a burnin ring of fire

[–]vandal823 12 points13 points ago

My mom, brother, and I all have irritable bowels. Each one of us will tell you that Immodium is a godsend. I can eat whatever I like, as long as I have some with me.

This has been a public service announcement :)

[–]CannonballSplash 9 points10 points ago

Have you guys ever been checked for Celiac disease? I had to carry Imodium with me everywhere until I got diagnosed. IBS is pretty much a "Iunno" diagnosis. I had to ask my GI doctor for a blood test specifically for Celiac.

This has been MY public service announcement! :)

[–]vandal823 1 point2 points ago

No, we haven't. And to be specific, we've never been diagnosed with anything. We've always just dealt with it by staying away from "problem" foods or using Immodium.

Once I have health insurance, I'll probably have tests done, but until then, I'll call it IBS, I guess. Thanks for the input :)

[–]CannonballSplash 1 point2 points ago

For sure! Good luck! It's kind of my pet cause -- in the US it can take ten years to get a correct diagnosis, if you can believe that.

If you don't want to get the tests, you can always give a gluten free diet a try. If you feel better, then great! The only problem is that you can't get tested once you're eating gluten free, as the antibodies aren't there any more.

All right, harangue over. I hope you find a way to feel better soon!

[–]vandal823 1 point2 points ago

Thank you for the advice. I'll do some research, and go from there :)

[–]uhmerikin 19 points20 points ago

[–]Phoequinox 8 points9 points ago

Came here looking for this.

I can't help but feel incredibly sorry for that poor girl. It looks like she starts crying at the end.:(

[–]Captain_Cowboy 3 points4 points ago

Pretty sure it's fake.

[–]Charles_Finley 0 points1 point ago

Heard it was from a foreign version of Big Brother

[–]Captain_Cowboy 2 points3 points ago

The guy yells "holy shit" in English with an American accent, so if nothing else, I'm pretty sure he's an America.

[–]Phoequinox 0 points1 point ago

Then I go into auxillary and feel bad for anyone this has actually happened to.

[–]toughluck1 1 point2 points ago

Was looking for this too. Did you see how fast it spread ? Like an ink drop in a glass of water wow

[–]ImSeeingRed 8 points9 points ago

Where is this from?

[–]BICEPS 3 points4 points ago

The depths of the internet

[–]uhmerikin 0 points1 point ago

Yeah, I have no idea honestly.

[–]Gpr1me 0 points1 point ago

Where from is this?

[–]swimmingmunky 1 point2 points ago

I really need the video version of this....for science

[–]toughluck1 2 points3 points ago

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JM6CGF3rUHM enjoy. from the looks of what she says at the start of it, it makes me think its from some sort of reality show. its a short video nonetheless

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=nE6Q7Cy9qTU this is for your further "sciences"

[–]itsthenewdan 1 point2 points ago

Hahaha, I can't stop watching this. The simultaneous combination of her jumping up in horror grabbing her stomach, the cloud of poo expanding, and everyone else scrambling to escape its encroachment is solid gold!

[–]cosmicabacus 1 point2 points ago

the gold didn't appear so solid in this case.

[–]psylichon 1 point2 points ago

Vaseline your hole before starting and you won't get sting ring.

[–]LeonHRodriguez 3 points4 points ago

why o why does eating two bags of Jalapeno Doritos back-to-back always seems like such a good idea at the time!

[–]Uniquitous 10 points11 points ago

Because trees?

[–]BusinessCasualty -1 points0 points ago

Eating a pizza and laugh at cat videos is normal but on trees it's awesome... Pot...not even once.

[–]LeonHRodriguez 0 points1 point ago

indeed, not even once

instead, it should be consumed many times

[–]hooterboy 1 point2 points ago

And one chicken head...

[–]MakingLove2U 411 points412 points ago

Well statistically, not in a hot tub with two attractive ladies.

[–]iSmokeTheXS 131 points132 points ago

Somehow I feel like the guy in the ad would never be in that situation.

[–]BranchDavidian 112 points113 points ago

I don't know. It's hard to tell how wealthy a person when their in a bathing suit.

[–]TheInternetHivemind 8 points9 points ago

Not if the bathing suit is made out of fibers from an extict animal mixed with gold.

[–]BranchDavidian 4 points5 points ago

That doesn't sound like a very utilitarian bathing suit.

[–]TheInternetHivemind 16 points17 points ago

It's held together with the souls of 3rd world children.

[–]BranchDavidian 10 points11 points ago

Ah, now that makes sense and souls are lighter than water and would provide a counterbalance to the gold, and because the souls of 3rd world children are waterproof, obviously.

[–]Jellyman64 0 points1 point ago

Not to mention the fact that the souls of third world children drive away scary water ameba.

[–]Noumenon72 0 points1 point ago

The souls of third world children, is there anything they can't do?

[–]dsdsds 0 points1 point ago

John Stuart Mill would not approve, unless the purchase of such underwear led to a greater good.

[–]iSmokeTheXS 74 points75 points ago

*they're

[–]red321red321 6 points7 points ago

don't bother correcting david he's insane and has been holed up in an educationless/spelling deficient compound with young girls for way too long. leave him be.

[–]ctay3120 0 points1 point ago

Let's hope his diarrhea doesn't come back

[–]FaptainAwesome 28 points29 points ago

Now your just nitpicking

[–]iSmokeTheXS 21 points22 points ago

.

[–]cbrules3033 1 point2 points ago

you're* I'm sure you were just trolling though. Write?

[–]borkborkbork99 0 points1 point ago

Its a bigger deal then you think.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Gpr1me 0 points1 point ago

Your your your your

[–]BranchDavidian 1 point2 points ago

Damnit! I almost never do that.

[–]sphigel 1 point2 points ago

You also left out a word.

[–]coralis834 0 points1 point ago

You know there's an edit button?

[–]BranchDavidian 0 points1 point ago

eh, I've already been called out.

[–]Mauldrich 3 points4 points ago

Not to mention if he's really wealthy, I don't think it matters when it comes back. Someone will take care of it for him.

[–]DorkPassenger 0 points1 point ago

This makes me want to be wealthy.

[–]Tehcoolhat 2 points3 points ago

The ad was originally a TV commercial. The guy sells paper. I have a friend that sells paper. He isn't wealthy. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dfajN-0YR0

[–]BranchDavidian 1 point2 points ago

Thanks for taking all the speculative fun out of this thread. Sheesh.

[–]valkyrio 0 points1 point ago

Just look at their teeth.

[–]BranchDavidian 0 points1 point ago

But what if they're British?

[–]StoopidKate 0 points1 point ago

Check if they're wearing a tie.

[–]Renmauzuo -1 points0 points ago

He's in a hot tub with two attractive women. We don't need to see what he's wearing to know he's wealthy.

[–]edgesrazor 0 points1 point ago

I don't know, give him a gold hoop earring and he could totally be a swinger.

[–]YoureMyBoyBloo 40 points41 points ago

[–]meeva 19 points20 points ago

I didn't expect that link so far down in the comments.

[–]thatsnogood 10 points11 points ago

Came here to see this. Didn't realize there was audio. That "Holy Shit" was probably the most appropriate usage of the phrase.

[–]heymrk 3 points4 points ago

I knew this would be here.

[–]misterpickles69 7 points8 points ago

The guy isn't having the diarrhea. The lady on his right is. And she looks relieved. He's just reacting.

[–]jakfischer 6 points7 points ago

Likely coming back from India Oven.

[–]TheBojangler 3 points4 points ago

[–]throwaway_lgbt666 1 point2 points ago

I imagine that guy would A: go to the toilet , wash up

B: invite the women upstairs with 'how come you didnt follow me up?

c: initiate swinging threeway

[–]Yoyo8 1 point2 points ago

I believe you're confusing those statistics to a redditor. Haha...hot tub..ladies....

[–]justmadethisaccountt 0 points1 point ago

You really don't want to have an awkward diarrhea boner.

[–]CONGART 0 points1 point ago

I was once at a hot guys place, hungover, about to have sexy times with two guys, then I realized that Sriracha-infused Pho last night had been a terrible idea. Feels bad man.

[–]DoTheRustle 63 points64 points ago

Smiling at some old guy and my friend in a hot tub.

[–]cmaxim 15 points16 points ago

Looks like the old guy felt it, poor guy, looks like she's really straining, and her friend has no idea!

[–]HilariousB 27 points28 points ago

Apparently 1993...

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

I mean seriously... an old ass commercial turned into a screenshot?

Come on reddit

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

This is an attempt at viral marketing (and obviously it worked). People maintain accounts and try and make them look legitimate, and then when their time comes they post shit like this. Another common one is to have a product with the label facing clearly towards the camera and then some cheesy headline like "Cookies taste so good after a bad day at work!"

[–]mushmancat 2 points3 points ago

hiyoooo!

[–]LOOK_MY_USERNAME 48 points49 points ago

Nothing sells stuff quite like telling the consumer that they need it to get laid.

[–]petedawes 0 points1 point ago

more like to not get not laid. Technically the same thing but the message is different.

[–][deleted] 71 points72 points ago

[–]down_vote_magnet 19 points20 points ago

I cycled across Vietnam a couple of years ago. I lasted the entire 10 days without any GI-related problems, and made it to the last hotel with 2 days remaining of my trip. It was then that I started to get severe stomach cramps and was basically bed-ridden for the last 2 days while everyone else went on a trip to see the Mekong Delta.

So I was taking Imodium to try to help with the fact that I was basically shitting water every hour while my guts twisted themselves into knots. Worst stomach pains I've ever had. Eventually we had to leave so I just about made it from taxi to airport and got on the plane without shitting my pants.

Then came the rest of the 30 hour trip home, involving a stop-over in South Korea. Those long-haul flights were fucking hell. I was so glad to get home to my bed (again, I just about made it home without shitting my guts out in the car). Anyway, I went to the doctor the next day and he told me taking Imodium the whole time was the worst thing I could've done, as I basically just kept all the nasty bacteria and stuff in my gut and dragged out the suffering far longer than I needed to.

TL;DR: If you are sick and have the shits, don't use Imodium. Just let it out.

[–]lordnecro 13 points14 points ago

I remember waking up at like 2am with the worst stomach pains I had ever had. After about an hour I was worried I might have to call an ambulance, because my gf was out of town and there was no way I could drive. I then proceeded to spend about 10 minutes vomiting. After that I felt perfectly fine, like nothing had happened.

Pretty cool how the body can often solve its own problems.

[–]itsthenewdan 7 points8 points ago

That reminds me of one of the least fun nights of my life, which happened about 10 years ago. I went to bed with moderate stomach pains, but thought little of it- I would sleep it off and be fine in the morning... Not so. I awoke in the middle of the night to terrible stomach pains that would come on in waves. In horror, I realized that somehow I hadn't taken a shit in 3 days. I scrambled to throw on some clothes and rushed over to a nearby 24 hour pharmacy to get some laxatives. I was fully aware that they take a while to work, but this was a desperation move. I got home and took the laxatives, but the waves of pain were getting worse and worse, to the point of being paralyzingly excruciating. I went to the toilet and figured that maybe I could exorcise this vile shit monster with a combination of patience and determination. I sat there, enduring the waves for about a half hour... until the worst one yet hit, and I began to feel some movement. In a single moment, I expelled a solid log of feces the size of my forearm! I immediately fell off the toilet trembling and recoiling in pain, gasping for air, and a few seconds later, had to muster the strength to hold my body up and vomit into that same toilet. The next morning, I felt basically fine.

TL;DR: I had a constipation-based shit explosion that hurt so bad that it made me insta-vomit. Felt fine the next day.

[–]slyk 0 points1 point ago

Upvote.

Done with internet for the day, etc. etc.

[–]oberon 2 points3 points ago

I've found it's almost always best to just puke and shit like crazy when these things happen. Just get it all out. Sometimes when I get a bit nauseous I just go make myself puke, and I immediately feel better.

[–]spacedout83 2 points3 points ago

Just speculating, but I'd imagine this is why antidiarrheal and antiemetic medications are available OTC in fewer and weaker varieties than things like analgesics and anti-inflammatories.

It's not safe to shut down certain bodily life-saving functions without having a doctor's supervision.

[–]glaux 0 points1 point ago

I've tried something similar. Got some bad food in Chitwan and in a short time vent very ill, just laying in my bed feeling awful. I vent to the toilet and then suddenly, without warning, explosive vomit all over the toilet bowl and some on the floor. I almost started laughing because it was so unexpected. Instantly thought of the scene in Team America.
Five minutes later I was feeling dandy, no pain, no nausea, nothing. Slightly hungry actually.

Btw, go visit Chitwan if you have the chance, totally worth it.

[–]Remote_Start 0 points1 point ago

Sounds like gallstones. You may feel fine but get checked out before another attack happens.

[–]what_ever_man 14 points15 points ago

Good advice. Imodium should be used in time of emergency, not because you got a little sick.

Fun Fact: Imodium is actually a strong opiate that doesn't cross the BBB thus can't get you high or relieve pain. It does however bind to the opiate receptors in your gut, controlling diahrea.

[–]spacedout83 14 points15 points ago

TIL Opiates that get you high don't give a shit about the Better Business Buearu.

[–]evilduck 4 points5 points ago

BBB = Blood Brain Barrier for anyone wondering.

[–]spacedout83 4 points5 points ago

BBB also equals Big Booty Bitches. Science is fun.

[–]evilduck 1 point2 points ago

that doesn't cross the BBB

Never cross Big Booty Bitches. Never.

[–]DownvoteAttractor 1 point2 points ago

That is a fun fact. Thanks.

[–]DorkPassenger 1 point2 points ago

Wait, so... if you want to stop the shits and have fun doing it, opium?

Excuse me, I have an appointment at Taco Bell.

[–]what_ever_man 0 points1 point ago

It's all fun and games until the shit hits the fan, mostly from shooting out of your ass once you come down.

[–]KimJongIlSunglasses 0 points1 point ago

So is there some kind of process one could apply to this drug in order to make it fun?

[–]what_ever_man 0 points1 point ago

People have tried with mostly bad results. Imagine being constipated for two weeks. The molecule is just too big apparently.

[–]GalacticWhale 0 points1 point ago

That's always what I've done. The most times I've ever had to hit the toilet when I had GI problems was maybe 4 times, then I was fine. I could get all that out of the way in 5 hours.

[–]jkats14 0 points1 point ago

Also, if you take too much of it, you'll basically crap concrete when you stop.

[–]justmadethisaccountt 0 points1 point ago

TIL

[–]Tiktaky 0 points1 point ago

This is the first thing my grandma ever told me. She said if you cough up, throw up or poop something, it's because your body thinks it's harmful. Do everything you can to help your body get it out of your system.

That's why Cold and Flu expectorants will cure you faster than suppressants. You just need to take a day or two off to be a gross ball of bodily fluids.

If you ever get a stomach bug again try Buscopan, It helps with the pain of the cramps but it doesn't affect how your system cleanses itself.

[–]Jorgeen 17 points18 points ago

[–]imbignate 7 points8 points ago

Wasn't this shown to be a fake?

[–]Dsch1ngh1s_Khan 9 points10 points ago

Nice try diarrhea girl

[–]nomau 4 points5 points ago

[–]oh_the_humidity 1 point2 points ago

Why does she sit in it all embarrassed-like? GET OUT OF YOUR WATERY SHIT LADY

[–]SemiProfesionalTroll 2 points3 points ago

I READ THIS AS "SHIT-LADY"

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

This immediately came to mind, and the only reason I came to the comments was to see it again.

[–]ndougla2 0 points1 point ago

I knew this would come up...I feel so bad for her. It's already embarrassing as hell, and then it hit the interwebz, too? ouch...not her fault, though...

[–]icansee4ever 7 points8 points ago

I'm sure Imodium thanks you for the free advertising.

[–]platewalrus 5 points6 points ago

I've made a huge mistake.

[–]cosmicabacus 0 points1 point ago

saw Gob immediately.

[–]irrelevant__gif 16 points17 points ago

[–]rhayward 6 points7 points ago

This is still kind of relevant.

[–]Captain_Cowboy 5 points6 points ago

That cat looks in bread.

[–]great_gape 3 points4 points ago

[–]adamgrey 1 point2 points ago

I was hoping to find this here.

[–]tjsteiner 3 points4 points ago

Is that Stannis Baratheon?

[–]theBelatedLobster 28 points29 points ago

I HAVE AN EXTREME ALLERGY TO IMODIUM. WHEN I WAS TWELVE I HAD TERRIBLE DIARRHEA SO I TOOK ONE OF THESE. SURE, I STOPPED SHITTING MYSELF BUT I BURST OUT IN HIVES. I EVEN HAD AN INFLAMED DICK. THE SKIN NEVER WENT BACK TO NORMAL BUT I HAVE LEARNED TO LIVE WITH THIS. I HAD TO HAVE AN ADRENALINE SHOT AT THE HOSPITAL BUT THEY WERE ALSO KIND ENOUGH TO GIVE ME A SANDWICH. I AM SORRY FOR THE OBSCURITY OF THIS POST, I HAD TO TELL SOMEONE AND IT NEVER COMES UP IN CONVERSATION. SHIT

[–]Dunga_Do_Balls 26 points27 points ago

WHY ARE WE YELLING?!?!?

[–]stevencastle 15 points16 points ago

LOUD NOISES

[–]freewheeling 10 points11 points ago

YOU'LL HAVE TO SPEAK UP, I'M WEARING A TOWEL.

[–]SemiProfesionalTroll 1 point2 points ago

I THINK THAT CAN SAFELY BE ASSUMED, I MEAN, WHAT KIND OF ASS-BACKWARDS FROOD DOESN'T WEAR A TOWEL?

[–]thunnus 3 points4 points ago

WITH ALL THE DIARRHEA GOING AROUND, I'VE GOT EVERY WINDOW FAN IN THE HOUSE RUNNING AT MACH 3.5!!

[–]Torch_Salesman 12 points13 points ago

My brain's decision to read that in Tracy Morgan's voice was the best thing to ever happen to me.

[–]Leofan7 3 points4 points ago

You're the shittiest lobster I've ever seen.

[–]cowpunter 0 points1 point ago

are you allergic to opiates?

[–]theBelatedLobster 0 points1 point ago

I DO NOT BELIEVE SO.

[–]uofmike 7 points8 points ago

Cumming

[–]Seanjohn2800 0 points1 point ago

...frosted turd?..

[–]red321red321 0 points1 point ago

turd in the hot tub, we've got a turd in the hot tub.

[–]seriouslyyyy 2 points3 points ago

Appeal to fear marketing for medicine, how creative.

[–]Callmemithrandir 2 points3 points ago

This guy look anything like Santorum to anyone else?

[–]tresser 6 points7 points ago

Thanks for posting another commercial to Reddit.

[–]blackasssnake 1 point2 points ago

wherever i am i just hope i dont have my balls tucked up my butt again

[–]KimJongIlSunglasses 0 points1 point ago

Is it Friday night at the docks already?

[–]RdRunner 1 point2 points ago

as a person who practically lives on immodium cause of stomach problems, this shit happens all the time

[–]jokr004 1 point2 points ago

Funny little thing to know about Imodium/loperamide is that it's actually an opioid that just can't cross the blood brain barrier (won't get you high). When I finally managed to quit opiates I used it to stave off withdrawal (never really did much).. people have unknowingly used the stuff for a really long time and ended up with full blown opiate dependency.

[–]cowpunter 0 points1 point ago

There are certain drugs/foods that will interact with it to make it cross the blood/brain barrier. I'll refrain from disclosing them because when it does it metabolizes into a chemical that causes brain damage.

[–]BiometricsGuy 0 points1 point ago

Thanks for that. Now, I know that there is some random food I might unknowingly eat in combination with Immodium that will give me brain damage. I just don't know what that food is.

[–]cowpunter 0 points1 point ago

Unless you're into eating ulcer inducing ungodly quantities of spices and/or taking 20 immodiums at a time you'll be fine.

[–]All_Hail_Mao 1 point2 points ago

The worst time to have diarrhea? Sitting on a 8 hour bus ride, in rural Vietnam, in the middle of the humid summer, and all rest stops you stop at are nasty squatter toilets with shit and trash everywhere and no toilet paper. This actually happened to me twice that trip too....

[–]skylenorman 1 point2 points ago

Twice? You didn't learn your lesson the first time?

[–]00Boner 1 point2 points ago

You know, some girls like that sort of thing...

[–]daf1reinside 1 point2 points ago

Is it only me or does he look a bit like Rick Santorum

[–]frorge 2 points3 points ago

I'd like the think the lady on the left is laughing as she releases and that the guy is just realizing and is freaking out.

[–]thunnus 1 point2 points ago

the moment when he realizes there are no water jets in the tub.

[–]ruhrohhhhh 3 points4 points ago

This stuff isn't all too funny for me. Not offended, but diarrhea pretty much poses a threat to me at any given time. (in short, my diet includes more dairy than it should and I have a weak sphincter)

i date very attractive girls. i am out on my bike or on a mountain in most of my spare time. but, the only way it's not a humiliating or uncomfortable experience - i take prevent diarrhea pills on a daily basis and pretend to go blow my nose (to wipe my ass) on an almost "whenever i can" basis.

anyway, i've never shared any of this before. and i realize it's a scattered thought, but i'm in a hurry (not to go wipe my ass, hah!).

[–]bennybeta 1 point2 points ago

That guy in the middle seems to be disturbed that the girl on the left just diarrhea'd all over him.

[–]getmarshall 1 point2 points ago

[–]Maverick1717 0 points1 point ago

First thing I thought of. God that show could be so ridiculous sometimes, but dammit I loved it.

[–]Novelt_Acct 0 points1 point ago

Who cares, they are prostitutes anyway...

[–]goofball_jones 2 points3 points ago

you have to pay extra for that, mutherfucker!

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]LikeFireAndIce 0 points1 point ago

Well, you have a vested interest in these sorts of things, He Who Stands To Poo.

[–]glaux 0 points1 point ago

I was on a mountain side 5000 m above sea level in Himalaya. Never taken a shit with such magnificent view!

EDIT: This was the view.

[–]Lord-Longbottom 0 points1 point ago

(For us English aristocrats, I leave you this 5000 m -> 24.9 Furlongs) - Pip pip cheerio chaps!

[–]justmadethisaccountt 0 points1 point ago

This ad is so good, its making me have diarrhea right now!

[–]MachiavelliV 0 points1 point ago

Where will you be?

I was there.

[–]maroonoctopus 0 points1 point ago

Who wants soup?

[–]sambadam 0 points1 point ago

"Imodium, get your shit together"

[–]blattkube 0 points1 point ago

Nip/Tuck! This. Episode.

[–]conradhenkel 0 points1 point ago

Why is it that only assholes with gastrointestinal and libido problems are always surrounded by girls?

[–]dillonflynn 0 points1 point ago

Hopefully in Germany, where this kind of shit is fine.

[–]Jackal_6 0 points1 point ago