I'm sorry, but in an emergency we're all just gonna have to die.

Boris740 · 5 months

Never mind the spider. Why is the emergency button Green?

another_brick · 5 months

Do you really think the spider is just going to sit there during an emergency? It's obviously going to be making rounds and taking down the injured.

Throtex · 5 months

http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3pfd8o/

thisspace4rent · 5 months

I always enjoy seeing a photo that I took a year ago at #1 on the front page.

Magrippinho · 5 months

Don't worry, it won't still be there when you'll have to push the button.

Why, it's probably in your hair as we speak!

mynameistux · 5 months

I don't get it

-Australia

admiraljohn · 5 months

A couple of years ago my Dad and I were carrying a water trough out of his barn to use as a launching stand for our July 4th fireworks... we carried it out and before we set it down I looked down by my hand to see a Black Widow spider about 6 inches from my hand.

I dropped it at the same time my Dad dropped his side and said "Wow, there's a Brown Recluse spider right next to my hand."

I think it may still be sitting in the field where we left it.

hoss7071 · 5 months

People rarely die from a black widow's bite. Life-threatening reactions are generally seen only in small children and the elderly.

http://www.emedicinehealth.com/black_widow_spider_bite/page2_em.htm

EDIT: I was addressing how fatalist the OP was being about being bitten by a Black Widow spider. Smarmy, out-of-context comments about other symptoms, are quite irrelevant.

welcometaerf · 5 months

Guys, you can't let spiders rule your life like this. We invented fire for a reason. Burn that motherfucker to a crisp.

Shitty_Watercolour · 5 months

http://imgur.com/yndJ7

[deleted] · 5 months

I doubt the spider would bite you, considering it isn't even on the button, and it would take maybe 200 milliseconds to hit the button...

And even if you fucked up enough to get bitten (think, missing the button and thrusting your hand into the spider), unless you're a small child, you're not going to die.

NDRedemption · 5 months

Don't worry, its just spider bro. http://i.imgur.com/D5Ieu.jpg

OmniscientMoose · 5 months

That right there is a perfectly good reason to push that button

you_lucky_bastard · 5 months

Something something about Australia. Upvote me.

biggles86 · 5 months

press button with stick, and inform them there is a spider on the button

Pwnsauce23 · 5 months

Try drop kicking it.. Works for me every time

RangerLt · 5 months

Spider: "Everybody calm the fuck down! I got this..."

Rockerdude34 · 5 months

NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE LOL AMIRTIE GAIZ?

gLovejoy · 5 months

Hit the button with your shoe

cococool · 5 months

Spiderman Junior watching out for us bro!

Skelmos · 5 months

As an Australian I'm obliged to tell you to man the fuck up.

bastard_ · 5 months

I'm sorry, but you are a pussy.

burst_bagpipe · 5 months

This has to stop! Spiders aren't that bad. They actually keep a lot of nasty insects from entering your home. they eat flying insects that like to bite and sting you, they fight scorpions and big ass centipedes. Usually if there is an abundance of spiders it means there is an abundance of the insects they feed on in your area. Yes they will bite you if you piss them off but so would anything else. Most spiders that can do you any harm will send off warning displays telling you to fuck off. Spiders are our friend but some of them need a wide berth. Spiders never have or never will hunt a human unless the simpsons becomes real. Spiders will only bite you if you piss them off enough, your finger etc becomes tangled in their web and they think its food or you happen upon where they have realised is a brilliant place to catch flying insects ( like under a chair ) Spiders do a job, they look mean but they are predators so have to fight other spiders, their prey and get a mate at the same time so. Kinda like when they are stalking a big bug You can't see me I'm invisible but I'm going to eat you, he spots a different spider from yesterday stalking HIM, AGAIN! he turns to confront him when he see's that wee hottie from earlier just along the branch and he tries to wave at her. BANG! The bug he was stalking has started attacking him. The asshat stalking him has attacked him. He's still waving to the hottie along the branch. He bites both bugs, killing them instantly. He breaks into a dance showing off his prizes to the hottie along the branch before wrapping them up for later and then.

FUCK!

I have spider web on me and omfg a spider aswell. Some stupid human has blundered into his biggest achievement and wonders why the spider is pissed off.

theurgetosurge · 5 months

Spider: COME AT ME BRO!

SlayBelle · 5 months

Australian reporting in. Throw something heavy at it, then on it, then on it again. Make sure you then grab every can of insect spray you can find and insert on spider.

VertigoFall · 5 months

WHY IS EVERYBODY SUCH A PUSSY ABOUT SPIDERS?

abiggaydeer · 5 months

Seems to me like there already is an emergency.

PandaSlammed · 5 months

could always kick the button maybe.....

thedestructinator · 5 months

Hmm, the spider itself is an emergency so makes me want to press the button, but it's presence means there's no way in hell I can press the button...

trumancatpote · 5 months

They say you get hours-long erections from the poison...........

dedokta · 5 months

Pffff. Come to Australia, that wouldn't even rate a mention! I could probably go outside and collect something way scarier!

skyhighdriveby · 5 months

I'd like to think the spider IS the emergency

JoshCSB · 5 months

Worst first aid kit ever

Odins_KItten · 5 months

.... if there were truly an emergency, I'd get a shoe and throw it at the button ... to hades with that spider >.>

ImmortalWarrior · 5 months

Jesus, i'd press the button. Spiderbro's just showing us what to do .

Carpe_Dragon · 5 months

I don't fuck with any spider big enough for its own mana bar.

iznotmeizu · 5 months

don't kill it, the spider is there to press the button when there is an emergency. It has your back

Potchi79 · 5 months

Found this happy guy (girl actually) right by my feet on my back porch.

koenn · 5 months

Me, to my girlfriend: "Would you press that button?" "Yes, because there's a spider. It's obviously an emergency."

chuckMastChiefnorris · 5 months

Why? Why no warning about a spider?

cellularfunk · 5 months

I thought all spider posts were prefaced with "NOPE...!!!"

Silly me. Well, even though I'm arachnophobic, I'd click it anyway. Thanks Reddit.

FarKingCnut · 5 months

Every Australian who sees this picture

bmaffitt · 5 months

I'll just leave this here (and hey, I actually took this photo): http://i.imgur.com/5vRGi.jpg

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