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top 200 commentsshow all 333

[–]mossyskeleton 179 points180 points ago

So you post an overused gif.

You'll fit right in.

[–]nukefudge 67 points68 points ago

redditor for 2 hours

oh but you were lurking before that, weren't you...

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 21 points22 points ago

It didn't take long just viewing the front page! But I have been lurking for a little while

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 228 points229 points ago

Is there a sub Reddit for extremely boring people?

[–]tehmlem 249 points250 points ago

The trick is to find interesting stuff other people have done and then pass it off as your own while vehemently complaining about others doing the same.

[–][deleted] 26 points27 points ago

Or, go around recommending that you hit the gym, get a girlfriend, go outside, lawyer up, delete facebook, etc.

[–]MankeyManksyo 10 points11 points ago

Where is the origin of this golden advice?

[–]Big-Baby-Jesus 18 points19 points ago

There were a bunch of "I found emails between my wife and her ex-boyfriend, what should I do?" posts a year or two ago. The top comments were always a variation of "Get a lawyer so she doesn't take all of your money, defriend her from facebook so she can't use any info there against you in court, and go to the gym to get buff so you can hump a bunch of chicks now that you're single."

This happened often enough that it became a decreasingly funny inside joke.

[–]lth5015 25 points26 points ago

Decreasingly funny joke? Nope! Chuck Testa.

[–]oD3 5 points6 points ago

And my axe!

[–]poobly 1 point2 points ago

CatFacts! Zoidberg! Rage faces! I don't want to live on this planet anymore! Eat 100 treadmills!

[–]ArtoriusMaximus 1 point2 points ago

I do love when I am "in on it."

[–]Magzter 4 points5 points ago

I'm very snide to people who spend their spare time watching things like Jersey shore and doing unproductive things, but I spend most my time playing video games and being on Reddit.

[–]dogandcatinlove 2 points3 points ago

I see nothing wrong with this.

[–]MtNoon 3 points4 points ago

Or you could just give credit where appropriate. I see stories all the time that start "This happened to my friend etc. etc."

[–]Rignite 3 points4 points ago

Or, you know,

become interesting yourself?

[–]HappyDays7 17 points18 points ago

Shut up, that involves thinking outside the internet.

[–]kstarks17 23 points24 points ago

it's cool dude. you already have more karma than me.

[–]lth5015 10 points11 points ago

than I*

[–]ULTRADETH 17 points18 points ago

www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinteresting is a favourite of mine, and I'm boring.

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 25 points26 points ago

subscribed! I just found out you can unsubscribe from things also... This place is totally different now!

[–]yetanotherx 13 points14 points ago

Yes. Unsubscribe from /r/pics, /r/funny, /r/atheism, /r/politics, /r/AskReddit, /r/WTf, /r/aww, and pretty much all of the larger ones. It makes your redditing experience so much better.

[–]ImAPeople 14 points15 points ago

What are you doing in r/pics?

[–]Deathitis54 9 points10 points ago

Before/right after you do this, make sure to go through the subreddit list and sub to anything that is even slightly interesting. The sheer loss of output from losing even one of those can make Reddit seem dead.

[–]RockLoi 1 point2 points ago

Is it possible to save subreddit groups? I've unsubscribed from atheism, askreddit and gaming, but sometimes I like to mindlessly kill some time flicking through pics and funny, but the rest of the time they clog up the frontpage.

[–]Todamont 5 points6 points ago

[–]thephenom21 9 points10 points ago

Just find a subreddit that deals with something you like. My two favorite subreddits are r/nfl and r/hockey since I am a big sports fan. I also subscribe to r/metalcore and r/posthardcore since that is the music I listen to.

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 11 points12 points ago

I did find some cool stuff browsing the random button but I have no idea how to just search for sub reddits...

[–]akira7of9 16 points17 points ago

I just use Google

[–]KilowogTrout 6 points7 points ago

Hes one of us.

[–]FlyingPasta 11 points12 points ago

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 3 points4 points ago

This is what I was looking for! Thanks!

[–]FlyingPasta 1 point2 points ago

No problem manny.

[–]goblinpiledriver 3 points4 points ago

If you have a hobby or interest, there is a subreddit for it. Often times the name of that subreddit is easy to guess.

Everything you listed in the title of your post is true of me as well, but I had no trouble finding subreddits that are relevant to my interests.

The ones I frequent are /r/starcraft, /r/onepiece, and /r/magicTCG.

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 4 points5 points ago

Well thank you! I have found the random button to be awesome. It's both terrifying and exciting at the same time. Found some pretty cool shit that way!

[–]TheoQ99 1 point2 points ago

[–]Saifire18 4 points5 points ago

I recommend you check out the wonderful land known as /r/spacedicks

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 14 points15 points ago

Someone already tried this... I will never go back there again.

[–]I_Am_Vladimir_Putin 2 points3 points ago

Have you been to r/flopflop? R/spaceflop?

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 10 points11 points ago

These have been suggested... I think I will stay away from anything with flop, clop, space, or dick in the title

[–]Saifire18 2 points3 points ago

Well, in all seriousness if you feel average you could always try /r/casualIAmA

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 1 point2 points ago

I like this... subscribed, I may even do one!

[–]tartay745 1 point2 points ago

Claiming to like metal core on the internets? You are one brave man.

[–]thephenom21 1 point2 points ago

yeah it was risky, luckily im not on r/metal where I would get downvoted to hell for listening to "false" metal...even though we just call it metalcore lol.

[–]Fyrus 1 point2 points ago

you might enjoy /r/progmetal

[–]Sleepy_One 8 points9 points ago

/r/canada

Juuuuuust kidding.

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 22 points23 points ago

Well I am Canadian...

[–]miewiu 3 points4 points ago

Touché!

[–]hjang86 2 points3 points ago

you just made my day. i can go to sleep now.

[–]patefoisgras 3 points4 points ago

You can always try the comments. Link karma is for chumps anyway.

[–]SubatomicTitan 4 points5 points ago

[–]merwaan123 2 points3 points ago

[–]TheChrisHill 10 points11 points ago

[–]rocketman0739 1 point2 points ago

/r/shittyama knock yourself out :)

[–]wastegate 1 point2 points ago

Judging by your title, you'd love /r/circlejerk

[–]ytknows 1 point2 points ago

If you like making fun of the things a lot of redditors like (and it appears that you do), try /r/circlejerk.

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 2 points3 points ago

That's not what I was attempting to do... just trying to figure it out.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

/r/atheism is mostly pictures of facebook last time i checked

[–]rhubarbs 2 points3 points ago

If by mostly you mean less than 10 out of the top 100 links on average, then yes. Mostly.

[–]blayned 4 points5 points ago

Nothing to see here. Move along.

[–]Tygurz 23 points24 points ago

Welcome to the club man. Everything you stated in the title applies to me.

[–]erythro 3 points4 points ago

Me too!

I do have a girlfriend, but she doesn't make cool stuff. She is lovely though :)

[–]pj134 12 points13 points ago

He didn't say he's not gay...

[–]Trackpad94 9 points10 points ago

Everyone on reddit's gay... wanna fuck?

[–]IAmAtomato 3 points4 points ago

fists your anus

[–]Bonshaquitalafondria 3 points4 points ago

wat.

[–]EroSennin78 11 points12 points ago

Hmmm.. for being NEW to Reddit you sure do know a lot of whats going on. I call Shenanigans.

[–]book_worm72 7 points8 points ago

He was most likely a lurker before he joined.

[–]Fyrus 1 point2 points ago

That's like turning 18 and saying "I'm new to the US" because you finally signed up to vote.

[–]pilekrig 2 points3 points ago

Terminal shenaniganitis

[–]tax_collector 47 points48 points ago

Perhaps r/spacedicks will peak your interest...

[–]_Mattman_ 117 points118 points ago

*pique, man.

[–]dont_press_ctrl-W 50 points51 points ago

Stop nitpiquing, man.

[–]Amaedoux 8 points9 points ago

Ha Ha! Your user name.

[–]tax_collector 21 points22 points ago

and this i can appreciate. You were able to correct me without being a condescending douche like some other redditors. upvote sir

[–]Silent_R 21 points22 points ago

I think the fact that you can accept being corrected gracefully reflects at least as well on you as it does on the person who did the correcting. Receiving feedback well is as much a skill as giving it well.

[–]babyjesusmauer 13 points14 points ago

Holy shit. That is twice in like 30 minutes I have seen someone graciously receive a typing correction on Reddit. Is this place broken, or something?

[–]thunderblumpkin 8 points9 points ago

Hurry someone get pissed!!!!

[–]pilekrig 9 points10 points ago

Your all dumb, grammar is easy.

[–]DashingSpecialAgent 5 points6 points ago

twitch

[–]iamrussianhero 5 points6 points ago

Like oral sex.

[–]tax_collector 2 points3 points ago

haha yea thanks man.

[–]i_no_like_u 1 point2 points ago

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 44 points45 points ago

You... You son of a bitch.

How do I undo that part of this site? I don't want to go there again.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points ago

Go to /r/SpaceClop - You'll be able to block it from there.

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 21 points22 points ago

I'm having a hard time believing anything in this particular strand of comments... Specifically now anything that has space in the title.

[–]HappyDays7 19 points20 points ago

Hey, this one's a learner. I was not.

[–]godulous 4 points5 points ago

/r/SpacePorn is totally safe, trust me. I'm an expert.

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 8 points9 points ago

I've found this lovely network of subreddits. Huge fan. RoomPorn and VillagePorn are great!

[–]spiceXisXnice 5 points6 points ago

It was purple...why was it purple?!

[–]ScholarZero 5 points6 points ago

Is that something you heard on a video in /r/spaceclop?

[–]incognito64 2 points3 points ago

This man is both a philanderer and a scoundrel!

[–]dysprog 1 point2 points ago

WHY?! WHY DID I CLICK ON THAT?!

[–]Kg_ 1 point2 points ago

ಠ_ಠ No amount of alcohol can salvage this evening.

[–]NumberOneBrony 8 points9 points ago

what have you done?

[–]reliable_information 1 point2 points ago

I read the tax_collectors comment as...

"Welcome to reddit, here's a picture of someone fucking a corpse!"

[–]LukeNygma 3 points4 points ago

Don't worry, there's a subreddit for everyone here :P

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

False.

There is no

/r/midgetjailbait

omg there is

and this is the only link

[–]WilliamRedfield 6 points7 points ago

You know, the best part is that "La pequeña diosa del caño" in spanish means "The little Goddess of the sewers".

[–]David0673 1 point2 points ago

now how the fuck am i gonna unsee that?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

I could post a gif of some guy getting his dick caught in a lemon squeezer or something

[–]occupytheinternet 3 points4 points ago

Looks like you've already got the hang of it.

[–]TheTalentedAmateur 3 points4 points ago

The same thing happened to me about a year ago. I was like you. First, I got a cat. Then a second one...Now I send school sports consent forms in for my kid, and where it says "religion", I put Taoist Agnostic (reformed) just to screw their computers up. I quit weed 20 years ago, but now that the kids are older, maybe I should start again...Get out while you still can.

[–]OfcDangle 2 points3 points ago

Wow, you sure know a lot about Reddit. New, you say?

[–]Devanismyname 2 points3 points ago

A lot of people on reddit don't have any of this either. They pretend to be cool for upvotes.

[–]day_bowbow 2 points3 points ago

[–]darchangel 8 points9 points ago

Except for being new to reddit, ditto on all accounts. But I've still managed to waste countless hours here, have a good time, and experience some pretty great stuff.

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 4 points5 points ago

I can see where the appeal is. I've been looking around and found some cool places! The random button is fun also, found this cool place called roomporn.

[–]yodach 1 point2 points ago

Man that guy had to feel like a tool hahaha.

[–]Root-Germanicus 1 point2 points ago

Ah yes, perhaps you might be interested in /r/circlejerk?

[–]sneakyrabbit 1 point2 points ago

I don't play games like diablo, my cool job is raising my kids, my partner is great but not handy, I don't smoke weed or to any other drug & I'm not an atheist. None the less, I still love Reddit. There, see? Feel better?

[–]lolwutpear 1 point2 points ago

Well, you already seem to understand the concept of reposts.

[–]Wallgirl 1 point2 points ago

redditors are being nice to you on this thread - but be warned, most of the time that you post something you think is thought provoking or interesting, you will get downvoted into oblivion, unless it's in line with the reddit hive mind.

that's just the way people are around here. mostly dicks. but hey, it can be fun and interesting - just don't get your hopes up.

[–]Ajkvr1 1 point2 points ago

get Diablo 3. And all you problems will be gone.

[–]FubarGrn 1 point2 points ago

are you my twin? ಠ_ಠ

[–]Fyrus 1 point2 points ago

For someone so new to reddit, you sure know all of it's weak points, and you even know how to repost things!

[–]sir_swagbadger 1 point2 points ago

I'm sorry?

[–]SlaughterMeister 1 point2 points ago

Not an atheist on reddit?

Give it time.

[–]zu7iv 3 points4 points ago

Seriously though, you should get Diablo 3

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 8 points9 points ago

I'm still making my way through skyrim... I am a slow gamer.

[–]simjanes2k 1 point2 points ago

Yeah I should have known. Last year the whole site was Skyrim for a few days.

Seriously, atheist and Diablo 3 are probably gonna happen. Maybe even the cat.

[–]ravikarna27 1 point2 points ago

Don't worry, you'll become an atheist :P jk welcome though!

[–]furywarrior 4 points5 points ago

redditor for a year and I am none of those things either. it doesn't really matter as long as you stay away from r/atheism. they can get a little bitey. I don't mind them myself (being an agnostic) but I think you know what I mean.

[–]pistashley_O 2 points3 points ago

and yet, you have proven your worth. Welcome.

[–]im_too_literal 1 point2 points ago

Same here! No pets, not an atheist (if I had to I'd say I'm spiritual-nonreligious, but that's almost as bad as being a charismatic on here), unemployed student, no creative boyfriend, no smoking anything, no camera, and no "real" videogames. We need to start a club.

[–]Gilgifax 1 point2 points ago

How'd you find out about Reddit?

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 5 points6 points ago

It's not exactly a secret club... I've come here from time to time to browse through some things... I'm just learning now you can customize it when you have an account.

[–]Gilgifax 1 point2 points ago

My bad! I had meant were you shown it by friends or stumble across it? I hadn't known about Reddit until early August of last year when a couple of friends suggested I check it out.

In all honesty, I hadn't meant it to be like a secret club or anything. Sorry if it came across like that!

[–]robberyinprogress[S] 2 points3 points ago

Was visiting my brother when he called me over to show me this ice soap thing that was on this site... Started browsing around occasionally since then, just made an account today.

[–]Gilgifax 1 point2 points ago

Cool story, bro! b :D d

[–]halfnhalf 1 point2 points ago

And you're already a grandmaster karma whore.

[–]Fishing_Dude 0 points1 point ago

Hey me too..

[–]BlueGreenPlanet 0 points1 point ago

You fit in here.

[–]NumberOneBrony 0 points1 point ago

describes me perfectly.

[–]Ted_the_red 0 points1 point ago

Same here man :/

[–]rolandwarter 0 points1 point ago

but you do have a great sense of embrace

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Welcome to the club.

[–]THREEinINK 0 points1 point ago

You want some cheese with that wine?

[–]FrenchieM 0 points1 point ago

I am the 1%

[–]codebrown 0 points1 point ago

well, not yet...

[–]Rageism 0 points1 point ago

I'm not the only one!

[–]beanso 0 points1 point ago

Hey, just here to tell you you don't need to smoke weed to get karma from /r/trees. Append "[#]" (with # being a number between 1-10) to the end of your post and you're guaranteed upvotes.

[–]1witty_teenager 0 points1 point ago

Brother!!!!

[–]trikillr42 0 points1 point ago

You are just like me dude. i know that feel bro

[–]Mokeez 0 points1 point ago

New to reddit Knows everything redditors post

[–]ChangingHats 0 points1 point ago

...but you sure do know how to draw attention to yourself.

[–]1leggeddog 0 points1 point ago

Take a seat in the back and don't make a sound.

[–]lectrik 0 points1 point ago

Fuck it, I'm upboating him.

[–]berusplants 0 points1 point ago

Give it time.....

[–]uguysmakemesick 0 points1 point ago

You sound like someone who I would like.

[–]i_drah_zua 0 points1 point ago

Well, you could always repost.

[–]Agehn 0 points1 point ago

The aspect ratio in the gif is so squished. It makes Obama look round faced and the awkward guy look like an awkward dwarf.

[–]BLACKdrew 0 points1 point ago

guess you're here for the porn then...

[–]Bondsy 0 points1 point ago

But you have more karma than me, congrats.

[–]Cadetsumthin 0 points1 point ago

You and I....were 87% alike...

My girlfriend makes me cool shit.

[–]fastslowfast 0 points1 point ago

You are so fucked!

[–]send2victor 0 points1 point ago

Now you have karma

[–]boshee 0 points1 point ago

But now you have karma.

[–]xwexcollidex 0 points1 point ago

Well. Looks like we are friends.

[–]LuVega 0 points1 point ago

Getting a cat is easy, becoming an atheist is easy, and smoking weed we is easy. (even though its illegal) Just do all those three things and you'll be fine. (Everything else is not so easy)

[–]HotHeadNine 0 points1 point ago

Me too!

[–]wakejedi 0 points1 point ago

Dig deeper, the front page is the cover of the book.

[–]what_ever_man 0 points1 point ago

Something smells fishy here guys, I think he might be trying to rob us with charm.

[–]Pinkie0314 0 points1 point ago

As much as it may seem like it, Reddit is not a place for people to compete with one another for awesomeness. It just happens naturally.
That being said, Reddit also provides endless opportunities to see awesome shit that might inspire you to develop your own awesome shit.
Stay with it. If there's something that you are into, there is almost guaranteed to be a subreddit of like-minded peeps.

[–]anderangel73 0 points1 point ago

Someone didn't check the office email today!

[–]brendosmash 0 points1 point ago

your life sounds boring what do you do for fun?

[–]LummyBummy_nighoe 0 points1 point ago

My man lets start a boring people's club! And talk about other peoples cool shit they do!

[–]rscarson 0 points1 point ago

Those things come later, don't you worry.

[–]Shikabamdesertwolf 0 points1 point ago

You sure you aren't from Circlejerk? NEW TACTICS I SEE... And they're working!

[–]REWK 0 points1 point ago

Take it easy on yourself. You made me chuckle tonight. Thanks.

[–]Swampf0x 0 points1 point ago

Do something. No, not scour the internet for something. Do something and record it, film it, or whatever.

Post results.

???

Profit!

[–]stajmw 0 points1 point ago

Sounds like me... except I own diablo 3... welcome to reddit, pal!

[–]Atlanticlantern 0 points1 point ago

To clarify: you don't have to own Diablo 3, you just have to complain about it.

[–]TheGeneralGrievous 0 points1 point ago

You're not... You don't..... You... Wait, what exactly is it that you DO then?

[–]moreorlessrelevant 0 points1 point ago

I was expecting a "I'm the 99%" at the end...

[–]vidgameplaya 0 points1 point ago

That'll do pig. That'll do.

[–]lostmyth 0 points1 point ago

same here

[–]babbish 0 points1 point ago

Try drinking Dos Equis.

[–]0snaps 0 points1 point ago

You'd fit in well with r/circlejerk.

[–]Woe_and_Fury 0 points1 point ago

We'll have to change you from top to bottom, First off I'd like to say, thank you for being honest...

[–]RockemSockemBrobots 0 points1 point ago

Yet.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

you are the 99% here my friend

[–]akutabi 0 points1 point ago

So . . . you're me.

[–]EthicalReasoning 0 points1 point ago

you still have time to buy diablo 3

[–]biceryen 0 points1 point ago

People like us should make a new website. With blackjack! And hookers!

[–]gin12 0 points1 point ago

Im upvoting you because I have none of the above either.

[–]jayz93j 0 points1 point ago

If nothing else i suggest you smoke weed

[–]Byrkmire 0 points1 point ago

You are exactly like me.

[–]FlippityFlip 0 points1 point ago

This reminds me of the beginning of the MCR song I'm Not Okay. On the video, one mate says to the other,

"You like D&D, Audrey Hepburn, Fangoria, Harry Houdini and croquet. You can't swim, you can't dance, and you don't know karate. Face it, you're never gonna make it."

I read this in that guy's voice.

[–]Twatless 0 points1 point ago

yet more karma in one post than mine combined

[–]Scenro 0 points1 point ago

Welcome to Reddit, the beginning of the end of your social life! :D

[–]Jemma6 0 points1 point ago

You'll fit right in here

[–]70000 0 points1 point ago

I thought this post was going to be about Obama not being an atheist to start with, sad that even with that expectation I am disappointed.

[–]BillTanner 0 points1 point ago

Can you photoshop?

[–]knerp 0 points1 point ago

you could get a guess pass

[–]JoeMoney333 0 points1 point ago

... Are you .... ME?!

[–]crocket54 0 points1 point ago

Then why are you here?

[–]TheColorMan 0 points1 point ago

That's funny, so do I, but I still float around this place for some reason.

[–]FuriousBanana 0 points1 point ago