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all 167 comments

[–]EarsOfRage 128 points129 points ago

People from areas without moose find these signs funny. Those in areas with moose know that moose are deadly.

[–]chillyhellion 35 points36 points ago

And that there's no appreciating how big they are from pictures.

[–]TheChosenOne013 7 points8 points ago

This is extremely true. My girlfriend and I decided to go to the Philadelphia Academy of Natural Science recently where they have a load of dioramas with different animals. They had one with a moose that particularly shocked me. I'm not a very tall fellow, but this thing just felt gargantuan. I never knew moose were that tall. I guess I kind of pictured a larger, fatter deer as the size of a moose, not a giant.

[–]Captainpatch 12 points13 points ago

The size and resilience of a moose will surprise anybody. If you hit a moose, your car will be totaled but the moose will just get mad. One of my teachers when I went to school in Alaska told a story about how he hit a huge bull moose in his VW Beetle and it just stood back up, shook its head, and repeatedly gored his windshield for what seemed like a couple minutes before running off.

From the wikipedia entry for the Alaskan Moose (the same one found in some parts of Canada):

Male Alaska Moose can stand over 2.1 m (7 ft) at the shoulder, and weigh 634.5 kg (1,396 lbs). The antlers on average have a span of 1.8 m (6 ft).

Most modern sedans and even small trucks don't stand a chance.

[–]chillyhellion 19 points20 points ago

I live in Alaska and I encounter these fellows occasionally on my way home from work. Pro tip: the moose has the right of way.

[–]Captainpatch 4 points5 points ago

Always.

[–]HH_mmm 1 point2 points ago

I used to live in Jasper, Alberta and one night a guy came into my hotel asking for a room because he was in an accident with a moose. I went outside to see his Ford F-150 (Not a huge truck but not the smallest either) Completely totaled on the front end. The truck couldn't even be towed they had to bring it in on a flatbed.

[–]Erzsabet 0 points1 point ago

I've heard stories where even semi's get fucked up by moose. In that case the moose doesn't always walk away, or survive, but the semi got fucked up as well.

[–]DrDragun 5 points6 points ago

Not only big but invisible at night. You see this one floating glowing dot and you think it's a roadside reflector then 20 ft away a huge black silhouette appears in your headlights and you realize it was the thing's eye.

[–]dgcarbs 2 points3 points ago

Most people usually don't live to tell a story like that though.

[–]All-American-Bot 4 points5 points ago

(For our friends outside the USA... 20 ft -> 6.1 m) - Yeehaw!

[–]EarsOfRage 0 points1 point ago

Actually, moose eyes don't reflect. That's the even more dangerous part about them.

[–]lil-cthulhu 19 points20 points ago

Googled "giant fucking moose" and this one seemed to work with the truck for scale..

[–]akatherder 38 points39 points ago

False advertising. That giant moose was just walking.

[–]CeruleanOak 2 points3 points ago

That's some pretty dangerous google image searching.

[–]moab4x4 2 points3 points ago

indeed maybe nsfw

[–]WrethZ 3 points4 points ago

They get bigger than that

[–]lil-cthulhu 6 points7 points ago

[–]Ref101010 0 points1 point ago

[–]aramatheis 1 point2 points ago

You can clearly see why we use them as food

[–]giever 0 points1 point ago

It's true. I mean, this one is fucking 5 kilometers long.

[–]nathism 8 points9 points ago

While I was an assitant mechanic one of the leads told a story of when he was working up in Canada. A big rig had come across a moose on the highway and stopped dead in traffic and turned off it's engine waiting for the moose to move on. Slowly cars started to build up till one jackass from America pulled up and after a minute of waiting started blasting the horn. This pissed the ever loving shit out of the moose which charged and proceeded to destroy the nearest thing at hand, the big rig. The driver luckily had enough time to get the fuck out of there but the big rig was destroyed. Cabin gone. Tires slahed. Engine rendered useless. Cargo hold, gutted.

I may not live in a place with moose, but I definitely respect them now. Also, that truck was deemed totaled and only worth parting out, which is incredible since it was at a standstill.

[–]Duthos 1 point2 points ago

I would LOVE to see some pics of that.

[–]nathism 0 points1 point ago

I would too, though google image searches do a good job

[–]HE_WHO_STANDS_TO_POO 2 points3 points ago

And those on Reddit appreciate the fact that you didn't say "mooses"

[–]supergoopinator 1 point2 points ago

Who would make that mistake? Like the plural of goose, we all know the word is meese.

[–]Sc0tt98 1 point2 points ago

I know My family and I hit one when I was little and it totaled the car. Thankfully there were no major injuries.

[–]windchime159 0 points1 point ago

So the moose was all right? Good to hear. =]

[–]Sc0tt98 0 points1 point ago

Yea, the moose ram off into the forest.

[–]IceeGado -1 points0 points ago

Surprisingly I bet it was all right. (Joke Killed, sorry)

[–]Osiris32 1 point2 points ago

A moose once bit my sister...

[–]BrittBillion 0 points1 point ago

People are like this with raccoons, tourists think they're so cute and feed them and shit YET that are the most vicious little fuckers in the animal kingdom.

[–]06405 -1 points0 points ago

So, are there a group of invincible moose or just one? If I see one moose that looks invisible, am I good for the remainder of the 5 km?

[–]AngryCanadian -2 points-1 points ago

Those badasses dont give 2 fucks about cars... I almost ran into one @ night. Bull just stood there looking at us about 1m away in front of the car. When we tried to back up and go around he just followed the car keeping same distance. just looking right at us... so surreal that was. my GF the entire time kept saying "just hunk at it, it will run away". We don't date anymore...according to her its because i never listened to her...

[–]taho_teg -3 points-2 points ago

I've hit a moose, and it's still funny.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Orobin 3 points4 points ago

Call of Duty.

[–]ElKaBongX 1 point2 points ago

I've seen a white tail deer total a(n?) suv and walk away... And they're waaaay smaller

[–]Erzsabet 1 point2 points ago

Yes, but they walk away and die in a ditch. I've seen many a dead deer within a short walk of the highway I used to live by in BC. They often end up succumbing to their injuries a little ways away from the road.

[–]AetherIsWaiting 0 points1 point ago

BC ftw! Once saw a momma and baby black bear crossing the highway (2 lanes) in my small-ass town. The momma bear made it across ok, but the idiot in the SUV in front of me didn't stop to let the baby cross (it was so scared) and I watched as the baby black bear (this thing was itty bitty for a bear) got picked up by the tire, flung between the frame of the car and the tire and thrown back on the ground :( I was so shocked at what I had just seen. Pulled over, and my mom who was in the passenger seat got out to see if he was ok. The little thing just ran off into the bushes after his momma, but you don't get wrapped around a tire without injuries :(

[–]Erzsabet 0 points1 point ago

Poor thing! =(

[–]jbond66 11 points12 points ago

If you hit a moose more than likely, you are FUCKED.

[–]otherworldsthanthese 1 point2 points ago

My cousin hit a moose and spun out into a ditch in rural Alberta.

What are you saying about my cousin?

[–]jbond66 4 points5 points ago

I'm saying your cousin in REEEAALLLY lucky. I also live in Alberta and know 3 different people who have hit moose. 2 are dead and 1 was permentally disfigured, cant taste anymore and such.

[–]otherworldsthanthese 2 points3 points ago

She's living in Australia now. Hopefully less moose in her future.

[–]RiPotato 2 points3 points ago

But then isn't Australia supposed to have even more dangerous animals?

Source: reddit.

[–]Captainpatch 6 points7 points ago

At least in the north anything that will kill you is huge, brown, and sharp (bears, moose, caribou, wolves, etc.) so you know to avoid it and not piss it off. They are also generally smart enough to stay away from humans unless cornered or surprised. In Australia (or pretty much any desert or tropical region) the things that will kill you are tiny, camouflage, and hide in your shoe.

[–]RockAndROFL 1 point2 points ago

The best thing about driving into a ditch in rural Alberta is that you can just drive right back out again.

[–]m_orning_shambala 48 points49 points ago

Sure they destroy your car, but they apologize immediately.

[–]apologetic_canadian 43 points44 points ago

I'm sorry.

[–]knowatimsayn 18 points19 points ago

Sorry if it's been mentioned before, but isn't your username a bit redundant?

[–]apologetic_canadian 50 points51 points ago

I'm sorry.

[–]PeskyCanadian 10 points11 points ago

Maybe it is, maybe it isnt

[–]emskem 2 points3 points ago

I'm sorry my Canadian friend here is being a touch pesky. It's in his nature.

[–]Erzsabet 2 points3 points ago

I think he's half American, tbh.

[–]gormhornbori 2 points3 points ago

No, no. You get it all wrong. After they destroy your car, you better apologize. That's how Canadians learned.

[–]JonInEnglish 12 points13 points ago

The moose is Canada's only asshole (next to Harper). No apologies/fucks given.

[–]Akakaburito 37 points38 points ago

You forgot the geese.

[–]JonInEnglish 13 points14 points ago

Those fuckin' geese.

[–]moonrobin[!] 6 points7 points ago

SQUAK SQUAK SQUAK

[–]Sc0tt98 5 points6 points ago

V formation everyone!

[–]montyy123 1 point2 points ago

DIVE DIVE DIVE!

[–]lifeisublime 2 points3 points ago

oh whats that? your eating french fries? well allow me to attack you until you drop your shit. - douchebag goose

[–]RiPotato 5 points6 points ago

Oh what's that? You're not eating french fries? Well allow me to attack you anyways.

[–]magictoasters 8 points9 points ago

Because you should have some poutine mother fucker.

[–]Not_Slim_Shady 1 point2 points ago

What's that? Eat everything but the crab grass in entire neighborhoods and leave shit everywhere and splotchy tough crab grass patches everywhere and ruin peoples lawns while also being protected so nothing can be done to make us leave? - supreme douchebag geese of Indiana.

[–]Maj12 0 points1 point ago

Goose shit. Everywhere.

[–]Torch_Salesman 0 points1 point ago

Yep. Moose just don't give a fuck. Geese will purposefully fuck up your life.

[–]haiku_robot 4 points5 points ago

Sure they destroy your 
car, but they apologize 
immediately.

[–]m_orning_shambala 2 points3 points ago

That's a mighty purdy robot you got there.

Will you come again please?

[–]Beerblebrox 0 points1 point ago

Oh dear... your vehicle seems to have collided with me. I'm terribly sorry. I shouldn't have been just standing in the road like that. I'll try to be more careful.

[–]piggylet 12 points13 points ago

[–]Roozle10 4 points5 points ago

...and just wait until you see the bears, eh?

[–]lil-cthulhu 13 points14 points ago

Bears don't have shit on moose. You are honestly better off with a bear.

[–]BusinessCasualty 8 points9 points ago

Yup at least a bear is lower to the ground. The problem with moose is that nearly all of their weight is likely higher than the hood of your car so you get a thousand pounds of noise coming straight through your windshield into your face :-(

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]BusinessCasualty 4 points5 points ago

If you've got time to hit the gas hopefully you can swerve at least a bit so you hit it on an angle, reduce the moose contact and put the weight of it into the column from the hood to the roof rather than through the middle of your windshield.

[–]homeless_man_jogging -2 points-1 points ago

No.

[–]phish92129 5 points6 points ago

From this site:

http://wilderdom.com/risk/RiskOutdoorRiskStatistics.html#Stark2001

Peter Stark (2001) has written a book about the risk of death, including that: "When it comes to predatory animals, humans have little to fear but themselves. We kill one another at a rate of more than one million per year, mostly wartime casualties. The second-deadliest threat is snakes, which kill over 100,000 people annually, followed by crocodiles (960), and tigers (740). The much-feared shark falls far down the list - only about seven human victims annually worldwide - making it lightweight compared to the ostrich, which when cornered can kick viciously with hammerlike feet and sharp talons and kills some 14 people every year. A couple more reassuring statistics: In the United States and Canada, you have more to fear from moose (six deaths per year) than any other creature except snakes (12). And the most likely place in the States to be attached by an alligator (three deaths between 1992 and 1998) is not deep in some swamp, but on a golf course."

Moose are statistically the most dangerous animal in North America besides snakes...but I'd take a snake, you can walk away from a snake but moose are batshit insane.

[–]BearOfDisapproval 2 points3 points ago

٩๏̯͡๏)۶ ლʕಠᴥಠʔლ

[–]Muddie 1 point2 points ago

For all looking for where this came from, it's a photoshop from Something Awful's Photoshop Phriday.

Not trying to be a 'oh, faaaaake!' dick, just trying to save some people from flocking to Canada to get drunk and try to find and attack an invincible moose, resulting in....

You know what? That sounds awesome. Fuck it. I'm wrong. It's real everybody! Grab yer bats.

[–]easyfrag 1 point2 points ago

If I don't stop it didn't happen

[–]foocorpluser 1 point2 points ago

ftfy: Welcome to Newfoundland

[–]Canadian-ambassador 1 point2 points ago

On behalf of all Canadians, I apologise for this.

[–]ShinyPichu 0 points1 point ago

apologise

[–]bill_posters001 1 point2 points ago

Anybody else see a Gorillaz reference?

[–]hushnowquietnow 1 point2 points ago

My dad hit a moose once during his morning commute back when I was in high school. He was at highway speed in a Grand Cherokee (at 4 in the morning or so) when the moose ambled into the road in front of him. The jeep was totaled. The windshield was caved in almost to the driver's seat and the engine compartment was in bad shape too.

The moose, on the other hand, rolled up and over the top of the Jeep, landed on his legs, and kept on walking. The fucker wasn't even phased.

[–]Langsten_Hughes 1 point2 points ago

Lets go to the mall

[–]Travdaman420 1 point2 points ago

No joke. People get Fking killed by crashing into those enormous bastards. My schoolteachers son was killed when hitting one with his car and it went through his windshield. this happened in northern british columbia.

[–]jaynone 1 point2 points ago

I live in Ottawa and want to put up a sign on the Trans Canada that says Deer Danger next 4400 KM on the westbound side and Deer Danger next 1400KM on the Eastbound side instead of these silly things

[–]danish_hole 1 point2 points ago

*welcome to alaska.

[–]TheRealHeroOf 0 points1 point ago

Challenge Accepted.

[–]kris919 0 points1 point ago

[–]guntfuddler 0 points1 point ago

Its funny until you realize they're not kidding.

Well, its still funny but... just in a grim kind of way

[–]jlamothe 0 points1 point ago

I know someone who described hitting a moose thusly:

Ever hit a bus? It's the same thing.

[–]sml6174 0 points1 point ago

[–]Jatik 0 points1 point ago

The population is decreasing!! Here's my sign to look out for mooses. Also pay no attention to the trees behind.

[–]ThEgg 0 points1 point ago

Not to a Saab. (3:09 mark).

[–]GrungeHamster23 0 points1 point ago

Invincible Moose. Sounds like a sweet band name.

[–]Diiiiirty 0 points1 point ago

Yep...sounds about right...

[–]melzor82 0 points1 point ago

There are similar signs in Maine which just say "Moose Crossing." "Invincible Moose" just seems a little ridiculous... Ridiculously AWESOME!!!

[–]buttez 0 points1 point ago

I saw the results of a 80mph Moose vs Yaris collision 2 days ago in Idaho. Neither one was going to leave the scene under their own power.

[–]sme00 0 points1 point ago

Inconceivable Moose

[–]wickler02 0 points1 point ago

Including the majestic møøse

[–]SUBZEROWINS 1 point2 points ago

A møøse once bit my sister.

[–]wickler02 0 points1 point ago

No realli! She was Karving her initials on the møøse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge - her brother-in-law - an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: "The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist", "Fillings of Passion", "The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink".

[–]someones1 0 points1 point ago

I hit a moose once. Surprisingly, the car won.

But that usually is not the case.

[–]jetpack_operation 0 points1 point ago

Less devastating than the more elusive invisible moose.

[–]IAmARetroGamer 0 points1 point ago

Or maine.

I remember hearing all kinds of horror storys about them when I was going to school at the LJCC.

[–]SpacePontifex 0 points1 point ago

Multiple moose, or one individual moose?

[–]Lamar_Scrodum 0 points1 point ago

damn starfish always crashing into moose

[–]mojimojr 0 points1 point ago

[–]Uberninjaa 0 points1 point ago

If I defeat him.... I'll be a LEGEND...

[–]Mi5anthr0pe 0 points1 point ago

No shit, my Canadian friend's uncle was in the hospital for 3 months after he hit a moose. The fucking moose just "got up and walked off".

[–]now_in3D 0 points1 point ago

that is aboot the funniest road sign i've ever seen

[–]AngryCanadian 0 points1 point ago

Those badasses dont give 2 fucks about cars... I almost ran into one @ night. Bull just stood there looking at us about 1m away in front of the car. When we tried to back up and go around he just followed the car keeping same distance. just looking right at us... so surreal that was. my GF the entire time kept saying "just hunk at it, it will run away". We don't date anymore...according to her its because i never listened to her...

[–]toxinogen 0 points1 point ago

I almost hit a moose while driving last year. It was scary as fuck. Those things are HUGE.

[–]Christophoro 0 points1 point ago

Moose likely to end up in a car crash.

[–]FeroxDeoVacuusVinco 0 points1 point ago

How is it invincible if I can still see it?

[–]XAPHAIS 0 points1 point ago

It's like 2 tons of meat on 4 stilts, then you hit their legs with your car and it falls on you crushing you to death.

They usually get up and walk away

[–]mecrio 0 points1 point ago

That's either a horrible large or fast invincible moose. Not cool.

[–]bearses 0 points1 point ago

[–]clonetek 0 points1 point ago

what? I can see it right there!

invisible, my ass.

[–]AlexElectric 0 points1 point ago

This sign is totally not funny, the moose are so big in some parts of boreal Canada that if you drive into one and it falls on your hood you will certainly die of crush injuries. Your car will be totaled with zero chance of survival. Most likely the moose stands back up afterwards and walks away. It's like driving into a small elephant.

[–]lesonj 0 points1 point ago

Dude, my dad saw an accident when a couple hit a moose. The husband died before my dad got to the car and the wife died in my dads arms. The poor moose was gone too. Hitting a moose or deer is deadly, and this sign is completely relevant.

[–]JohnnyFriday 0 points1 point ago

I love women who use "Dude", Marry me.

[–]alltwo147 0 points1 point ago

Shit, that's where Gorillaz filmed 19-2000, isn't it?

[–]argh_minecraft 0 points1 point ago

Boss fight for the Canada level.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

LOL it's funny cuz it's true!

[–]remarkless 0 points1 point ago

5km. Whats that like 90 miles?

[–]zarilix 0 points1 point ago

Don't laugh! These monsters exist and will find you with their car seeking, kamikaze bodies!!!!

[–]Yuppers16 0 points1 point ago

Alright guys, final boss stage.

[–]BurnOutYourEyes 0 points1 point ago

Fun fact: If you hit a moose with your car your airbags might not deploy because moose have tall spindly legs. But don't worry, their 1+ ton body can come flying through the bed of your car moments after, so the airbags are going to be much help anyway.

[–]heihoshindo 0 points1 point ago

"Sorry" -Invincible Moose

[–]AQiLd 0 points1 point ago

The best part is moose is plural for moose. So it could be that hitting moose with your car is dangerous. Or there could be one invincible super-moose going around fucking shit up.

[–]supergoopinator 0 points1 point ago

Mythbusters have an episode where they try to take out the legs with a speedy convertible and have the car escape under the moose before the body hits it.

[–]AetherIsWaiting 0 points1 point ago

If you give a moose a muffin....

[–]Roomy 0 points1 point ago

Let's just hope the invincible moose doesn't team up with the invincible bears. Then we'll have invincible bear/moose combos running around raping out churches, burning our women.

[–]sotted-moose 0 points1 point ago

If this is real, I want one of those signs.

[–]Muddie 5 points6 points ago

The 'Something Awful' watermark should tip you off that it might not be.

Edit: found the SA thread this came from.

[–]jlamothe 2 points3 points ago

It's highly probably they only changed the text on this one. Moose are destroyers of cars.

[–]jonquille 2 points3 points ago

Actually, I'm pretty sure that the top sign does exist. Newfoundland has a fairly serious moose problem.

[–]M3ggers04 2 points3 points ago

It does very much so. I live in newfoundland and these signs are everywhere, but it is really needed. We also had a DetectionSystem installed.

Driving home 2 nights ago a moose ran out of the woods while I was driving on the highway. Where it ran out to was an opening in he guardrail and I thought, that's it I'm fucked. I slammed the breaks on and the moose was gunning it (Running fast) but what happened next made me sigh in releif and also thank the man who made guard rails. The moose hit the end of the guard rail and stumbled, which gave me enough time to swerve.

Most accidents happen because moose love to just appear and start running across roads. I am very lucky, but a lot of people aren't. There was an accident last night close to Bay Roberts which took the mooses head clean off, and one the weekend before. Luckily no one was seriously harmed. I hunt moose and I know they can get to be fucking huge and are more dangerous in the fall where it is rutting (mating) season, they often appear more often due to be drove out of the woods by hunters.

In conclusion, these signs exist and do so for a very good reason, although most people ignore the signs and do not pay near enough attention.

[–]Evadt 0 points1 point ago

The biggest kick in the balls....they were an introduced species

[–]tamazin 0 points1 point ago

Just the top part, the invincible text was likely photoshopped in. They're available throughout the Maritimes - I bought one for my stepfather at a Michaels (arts and crafts store). He put it up in his yard in Florida. You're most likely to see the actual sign displayed in Newfoundland, though.

[–]Sc00termcgee 0 points1 point ago

It is real - minus the text - these are used in Quebec.

[–]supergoopinator 0 points1 point ago

I bought a plastic replica of those signs in Newfoundland. They are on the streets, and now also hanging on my bedroom door.

[–]WeTarScientists 0 points1 point ago

Oh, it's more real than you could possibly imagine.

[–]larynx1982 0 points1 point ago

KM? Oh Canadians, you're so silly!

[–]white111 0 points1 point ago

how many countries in the world dont use the metric system ? lots?

[–]zdarlight 0 points1 point ago

[–]Crowd_of_Gods 0 points1 point ago

Aaaaah! Eyebleach! NSFW. NSFL.

[–]theawesomebla -2 points-1 points ago

Freaking kilometers.

[–]alexwisswolf -4 points-3 points ago

Oh I get it, it's funny because they use the metric system.

[–]kgall -1 points0 points ago

But... I can see it

[–]Fat_Je5u5 -1 points0 points ago

Probably photoshopped. I see the signs all the time and not a single one says "invisible moose". However it's not impossible that some one was bored on the job

[–]Devilheart 0 points1 point ago

It says 'Invincible'.

[–]Fat_Je5u5 0 points1 point ago

Either way

[–]Dashzz -1 points0 points ago

I live in Canada and that sign is 100% true.

[–]mastersword83 -2 points-1 points ago

where did you find this? I have to check it out

[–]Muddie 7 points8 points ago

[–]Scrubtanic 1 point2 points ago

Reddit a week and a half ago

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Aww_fuckberries 1 point2 points ago

if we could win..

lol

[–]telim -1 points0 points ago

Who is "we" ? If this is the French then I say bring it on!