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How I picture people who are freaking out about not being able to log into Diablo. (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by mmajewski

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[–]EarthMephit 8 points9 points ago

Not a good idea.

Breathing into a paper bag during a panic attack can fatally lower oxygen levels in the blood stream, and increase carbon dioxide levels, which in turn has been found to be a major cause of panic attacks.

[–]doubl3h3lix 1 point2 points ago

I believe the idea is that it is to prevent hyperventilation. The CO2 will offset the excess O2 that is taken in whilst beginning to hyperventilate?

[–]zerohourrct 0 points1 point ago

Only that, if done right, it's super-effective. And will result in what Earthmephit said. The better solution is to give them some straws to breath through, or better yet, some simple and repetitive task to repeat over and over. The majority of hyperventilation is caused psychologically, if you can get the patient to calm down, problem solved.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

Pretty accurate.

[–]beachjustice 5 points6 points ago

I felt like crying after i watched my mom start flipping out.. "EPIC FUCKING FAIL BLIZZARD. WE SHOULDN'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS AFTER PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THIS GAME. WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR YEARS. FUCK IT I'M NOT EVEN PLAYING IT." I was like, "It's going to be fine. There are millions of people trying to get on." All while thinking to myself, "Christ I thought I was childish sometimes. This is my mother." I will always love her regardless.

[–]heinleinr -1 points0 points ago

Hey beachjustice, you seem like a nice mark person.

Can I borrow $60?

[–]beachjustice 0 points1 point ago

Sure but you better have it back in a week with 50% interest. Otherwise... Let's just agree there won't be an 'otherwise' ok?

[–]Froggy_Tank 6 points7 points ago

Pardon me, but...

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

No, I think Jenga's a game.

[–]theimpropergentleman 6 points7 points ago

Laugh track

[–]I_Fuking_Love_Pandas 4 points5 points ago

Kind of, except I just packed another bowl. Gotta get through this nightmare somehow.

[–]mmajewski[S] 2 points3 points ago

I chuckled.

[–]MrMindGame 0 points1 point ago

Upvoted for stoned gaming. The best kind of gaming.

[–]CR00KS -4 points-3 points ago

Mr cool guy here. I bet you used captain crunch.

[–]RIPdig 1 point2 points ago

Actually... I am wearing a blue shirt thank you very much.

[–]Bletz 0 points1 point ago

JUSTIFIED IMO FUCKING RESPIRATOR PLEASE.

[–]Rexluna 0 points1 point ago

This occurance has been one of the most amusing things I've read on fb since Skyrim (and its lovely glitches) released.

[–]kentathon 0 points1 point ago

The worst part is, for games like this if you are even hours behind the curve you have missed out on everything.

I work night shift, so I'm about to sleep for eight hours. When I wake up I'll be something like 15 hours behind everybody else who plays. It is the difference between having a good first playthrough with friends and a first playthrough solo.

[–]heinleinr -1 points0 points ago

Yeah, but I think a picture of someone who has paid $58 (AUS) for nothing would be more accurate.

It's been my observation that people don't like to get ripped off.

[–]Wohlfe 0 points1 point ago

I'm not angry, i'm just dissapointed.

[–]GhostSongX4 -1 points0 points ago

How can you be disappointed? Of course this was going to happen.

[–]Wohlfe 1 point2 points ago

I just figured Blizzard would have planned better since they run WoW and Starcraft 2. I guess they under estimated. By a metric fuck ton.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

Launch day versus every day after launch are insanely different. With a product like Diablo III, you can expect two things:

One, that they know initial demand is going to be crazy, and have rented extra server space for a short period.

But, Two - they'll never meet the demand of everyone all at once (when in reality, after day one, the majority will never be all at once again.) So they don't need to blow wads and wads of cash at what is inevitably going to be insane and end up with various errors anyways, errors that the community now expects, and isn't likely to stop you from buying another Blizzard game just because the first few hours after launch the servers were jammed. They ran the numbers, and they took reasonable measures, but they're owned by a publicly traded company (Activision), and financial decisions ultimately have to be justified with numbers. Paying ridiculous amounts for a demand that levels out in a couple of days isn't justifiable by their metrics. It's too expensive for what? It was never going to be stable, and it doesn't hurt them to have it worked out on the fly, as long as they've done their due diligence prior to launch.

People look at WoW and say "Wait, they run how many WoW players at once?! So why doesn't D3 work?" Except that the majority of WoW players are international these days, and the servers are all spread out, and anyone who has played WoW on a patch day in the last seven years can tell you they still go down for massive maintenance, plus emergency repairs, plus have connection issues, every single patch (when everyone jams the servers). It's actually just par for the course at this point to not bother getting on their servers till everyone has stopped hammering them (I can't speak for the last six months, as I quit in December, but it was still a huge queue and issue logging in when the last patch of the current expansion came out).

[–]Realtime_Ruga 1 point2 points ago

Or three, they implement some kind of queue system that lets players in at a rate the server can handle.

But that's just crazy.

[–]logicom 0 points1 point ago

They do that with WoW. The queue system usually gets overloaded shortly after the launch of a big patch and only begins to work properly serveral hours later.

[–]GhostSongX4 3 points4 points ago

Honestly, I think they knew this was going to happen.

I think there was a deliberate choice made to either make sure to have the server capacity to handle the sudden explosion of players or to just figure that a bunch of people won't get to play and it sucks for them.

In the end they still sold copies of the game and without expanding the amount of servers they won't have to pay for them and they won't have to pay for extra maintenance. Cost wise, it's cheaper to screw over players.

[–]Wohlfe 1 point2 points ago

Probably. Maybe it was an inside job by the IT guys, trying to convince the executives to get an offline mode. :P

[–]GhostSongX4 0 points1 point ago

That'd be smart of them :)

[–]Wohlfe 0 points1 point ago

As they are promptly fired.

[–]GhostSongX4 0 points1 point ago

heh heh exactly.

[–]Falconhaxx 1 point2 points ago

Don't know why you're being downvoted, you're absolutely right.

Only an idiot would be under the impression that Blizzard is willing to invest a huge amount of money to handle one single spike. Error 37 is better than having to upgrade their Auth servers.

It's a foolish idea to begin with.

[–]GhostSongX4 2 points3 points ago

I'm being downvoted because I'm saying something they don't want to hear. And because reddit is fucking downvote happy, if someone says something you don't like well obviously you bury that comment, no matter how unoffensive it might be, because on Reddit only the circle jerk supporting bullshit should rise to the top.

[–]aboganza 0 points1 point ago

why do you think they made a 3am edt release time?

[–]GhostSongX4 0 points1 point ago

Because it was midnight where their servers were?

[–]LanEvo03 0 points1 point ago

I hope they mention this in the big bang theory. Would be awesome.

[–]8bit_porno_plumber 0 points1 point ago

Sheldor the Conqueror back online offline.

[–]3HourLineForSanta -1 points0 points ago

Yes that IS what an anxious person looks like. Thanks.

[–]Toshiba682 0 points1 point ago

Nobody knooooows...

[–]bombproof 0 points1 point ago

i hate that show so much

laugh track

[–]thatshowsucks -1 points0 points ago

downvoted because that show sucks.

[–]Considerable -4 points-3 points ago

Hold on everybody, it's time for the Reddit Circlejerk about how bad Big Bang Theory is...

[–]FloydJackal 1 point2 points ago

laugh track

[–]Considerable 0 points1 point ago

You know, this doesn't bother everyone that much. I didn't even notice it till Reddit pointed it out, and it's not that intrusive unless I'm listening for it.

[–]FloydJackal 0 points1 point ago

It's just about always bugged me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8r3tHUK6v4

Why do they have laughter when he says "My new computer came with Windows 7", or "Windows 7 is more user friendly than Windows Vista"? I understand laughing at "I don't like that" because that's the punchline. It may not be good, but it's a punchline nonetheless.

[–]barrowsx -4 points-3 points ago

HEY I DON'T LIKE THAT SHOW AND NEITHER SHOULD ANYBODY ELSE!

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