this post was submitted on
1,058 points (53% like it)
7,253 up votes 6,195 down votes

funny

subscribe2,420,141 readers

8,482 users here now

PLEASE, No posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.


Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress.

  • Rage comics - Go to /fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).


Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.


If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators


The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.


CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

top 200 commentsshow all 224

[–]BedazzledPenis 372 points373 points ago

Upvoting because you resisted the urge to write "SHAVED PUSSY" to get attention.

[–]BigAndyOx 173 points174 points ago

My brain automatically translated it anyway

[–]boxtops91 12 points13 points ago

Here's my SHAVED PUSSY. I'm shameless.

[–]camelCase47 6 points7 points ago

It looks soft and smooth.

[–]camelCase47 7 points8 points ago

And for some reason I thought I was going to see a shaved vagina....

[–]I_POTATO_PEOPLE 66 points67 points ago

"BedazzledPenis," master of discretion.

[–]spacemanspiff30 7 points8 points ago

As tends to be the case on reddit

[–]drgk 7 points8 points ago

As soon as I clicked on the comments I knew the top one would involve a shaved pussy joke.

[–]KayteeBlue[S] 5 points6 points ago

Trust me, I was tempted.

After seeing your comment, I realize it was a much better idea in theory. Hahahahaa... Ahem.

[–]Quantization 3 points4 points ago

Came here to write that as a comment.

Is now disappointed.

[–]TorchicBlaziken 5 points6 points ago

It doesn't matter whether you came here to say it, all that matters is that someone did.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

I came here to say exactly that. Nice username, by the way.

[–]triksterx 134 points135 points ago

His head. Its so... BIG!

[–]BaconSalad 81 points82 points ago

that's what she said!

[–]13osiris13 103 points104 points ago

Thanks, 2008. Back to you, 2012!

[–]Toastsx 79 points80 points ago

thats what kony said

[–]kamjanamja 30 points31 points ago

What about 1999?

[–]goblinpiledriver 54 points55 points ago

WHAZZUUUUUUUP?!

[–]xDividedByZer0 24 points25 points ago

Let's do 1920.

[–]cadencehz 40 points41 points ago

That would be the bee's knees!

[–]emu420 5 points6 points ago

Sigh...upvote, upvote, upvote....

[–]Ritoki 4 points5 points ago

Everything is copacetic!

[–]TheFugget -1 points0 points ago

OMG U LIKE COPACET 2? THEYR LIEK MY FAV BAND<3333333333333333333

[–]spacemanspiff30 2 points3 points ago

Only if we can do the Charleston as well.

[–]fakelife2 13 points14 points ago

1999 here...still partying

[–]sarahcasarah 1 point2 points ago

Do you have a lion in your pocket?

[–]astronomer7 2 points3 points ago

Baby, he's ready to roar.

[–]Skitrel 5 points6 points ago

All your base are belong to us.

[–]Yoyo8 5 points6 points ago

This cat is planning for the ultimate payback. I suggest to hide.

[–]kjk414 4 points5 points ago

"I hope you enjoy dead mice."

[–]bambamhoneycomb 38 points39 points ago

My cat is 18 lbs and super fluffy. Ive thought about shaving him many times until I saw that picture. I can't let my cat walk around looking like that.

[–]Aparty 57 points58 points ago

My cat is 18 lbs too, here he is shaved http://i.imgur.com/hYLEp.jpg

Not so bad when they're chunky :) makes it easier for him to clean himself.

[–]bohogirl1 106 points107 points ago

he's obviously sobbing.

[–]Aparty 19 points20 points ago

Probably had a hunch I'd post his nudey pics all over the internet.

He knows me so well.

[–]Bazing1980 2 points3 points ago

Your cat is on to your shenanigans.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Aparty 10 points11 points ago

I approve this message.

[–]jjremy 2 points3 points ago

There is so much regret in that picture.

"Oh geez, what have I done!?"

[–]Killerkitti 2 points3 points ago

Lion cat! My neighbor gives his cat the same haircut in the summer. I love it.

[–]ZombeeAndroid 12 points13 points ago*

My Maine Coon mix is 18lbs and he did not turn out looking like a cat head on a post.

I think yours will be fine. After getting him shaved he seems a lot happier(after the initial day or two of twitchiness and confusion of course, this was his first shave). He'll climb around on his tree now as if he's more sure of himself and there's no chance of matted fur(He hates it when I try to brush his back legs and butt).

EDIT: This be he.

[–]Pajamas_ 4 points5 points ago

If he is unable to groom himself, he would be very 'thankful' if you did him the favor of a trim.

[–]Lost4468 7 points8 points ago

Right after he slices your arms open with his claws.

[–]Pajamas_ 3 points4 points ago

Professional groomers know exactly how to handle cats for this purpose.

I wouldn't suggest doing it yourself if you are inexperienced or the cat is unpredictable.

[–]rhazelh 0 points1 point ago

Doesn't mean the cat isn't plotting horrid revenge in the next life.

[–]All-American-Bot 9 points10 points ago

(For our friends outside the USA... 18 lbs -> 8.2 kg) - Yeehaw!

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points ago

Yippie ki yay mother fucker.

[–]Clown_Shoe 9 points10 points ago

Yippie ki yay master falcon

Censored it for you.

[–]NoNeedForAName 5 points6 points ago

TBS (the master of ruining action movies with editing, excessive commercials, and terrible dub overs) once replaced it with "melon farmer."

[–]jerseyg67 2 points3 points ago

TBS quote from Scarface "FORGET YOU!"

[–]ganon0 2 points3 points ago

I'm tired of these monkey-fighting snakes on this monday to friday plane!

[–]rhazelh 0 points1 point ago

Poor naked kitty.. :(

[–]Space_Cranberry 0 points1 point ago

My cat seemed to like it. Brought kind of a spring in his step. Probably because he was cooler and no pinchy knots of hair.

[–]goddesspyxy 40 points41 points ago

[–]TheDirtySockMonkey 17 points18 points ago

[–]scott 3 points4 points ago

good god. did you shave him just to not have to deal with the cat hair everywhere?

[–]goddesspyxy 4 points5 points ago

I do it in the summer to keep him cool. He likes to lie naked in front of the fan.

[–]mindrag 5 points6 points ago

He and I have something in common.

[–]Pemby 2 points3 points ago

Ha, in both pictures he totally looks like he's doing a seductive pose, down to his facial expression.

[–]bradygilg 75 points76 points ago

Here's my shaved kitty.

http://i.imgur.com/pdjFg.jpg

[–]Aparty 57 points58 points ago

How long before he liked you again?

[–]chrismetalrock 14 points15 points ago

how long does cat hair take to grow back? ;)

[–]T-Luv 11 points12 points ago

The cat could still harbor ill will even after the fur grew back.

[–]Urban_Savage 5 points6 points ago

My sister as the same breed of cat and also shaves it like this. The cat is actually much more pleasant and loving when its not miserable from being hot all the time.

[–]Draiko 13 points14 points ago

He looks sooooo happy. Watch your back.

[–]NonaSuomi 4 points5 points ago

Everything you have ever loved will come to a screaming and horrific end. Tonight.

[–]moejike 1 point2 points ago*

Ah Yes, the rare Bobble-Head breed. Most majestic.

[–]Space_Cranberry 1 point2 points ago

I had a persian who walked around like he was a badass after getting shaved.

[–]notafinga 0 points1 point ago

I don't think I could resist keeping that cat shaved. The short white fur looks like lambs wool. Just precious:)

[–]stopmotionporn 0 points1 point ago

Are they always so ... lumpy?

[–]jakemyers7 -3 points-2 points ago

Trimmed FTFY

[–]fastlikeninja 32 points33 points ago*

I posted pictures of my shaved cat and got attacked for it, Fuck you all. Edit: http://i.imgur.com/9NzUk.jpg photo.

[–]Space_Cranberry 1 point2 points ago

Tell the haters to fuck off. Say, "'tis not your cat, child"

[–]SPEECHLESSaphasic 1 point2 points ago

Why did you get attacked for it?

[–]fastlikeninja 3 points4 points ago

People saying it was cruel that we shaved him.

[–]Monocle_Lover -1 points0 points ago

In this example I agree. Some cats get hot over summer and some cats get matted fur. No biggie.

[–]fastlikeninja 1 point2 points ago

We shaved ours mainly because his fur was too dirty and nasty to be washed after a month lost outside :( Also we live on a tropical island, he is loving not having the hair!

[–]goddesspyxy 0 points1 point ago

Both things are true of the cat in the example you provide. I know because it's my cat.

[–]Monocle_Lover 0 points1 point ago

LOLz for a minute there I thought you were SPEECHLESSaphasic and I had just showed him his own cat. Note how I didn't steal your pictures, I sent everyone your way.

[–]Malithion 12 points13 points ago

Side veiw please?

[–]super_kame_guru 6 points7 points ago

I did this to my cat as well, the groomer sold me when they called it a "lion cut" before and after

[–]2fingers 18 points19 points ago

I hate to be the one to tell you this, but that's a tiny cow dressed as a cat.

[–]super_kame_guru 5 points6 points ago

Well since he is currently tipping the scales at 19lbs, hes on his way to becoming a real cow soon

[–]JInxTM 0 points1 point ago

Aw, he has a heart on his side :D

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

It's like a giraffe and a cat had a child.

[–]orost 8 points9 points ago

Why do you shave cats? I can't think of any reason for that.

[–]fishebulb 7 points8 points ago

The only thing i can think of is if their hair gets too knotted up.

[–]jskater17 8 points9 points ago

Keeps them cool during the summer.

[–]cyberslick188 -3 points-2 points ago

At least for dogs, this is usually a myth. It just doesn't help them, heat is heat, dogs don't really sweat.

[–]CAPSON 1 point2 points ago

This is generally true, so I'm not sure why people are downvoting.

http://pets.webmd.com/features/shaving-dog-or-cat-during-summer

Some relevant bits: A pet's coat is designed by nature to keep it cool during the summer and warm in the winter. By shaving your pet you usually interfere with this built-in temperature regulation.

Cats, in particular, are very good at regulating body temperature and "really get no benefit from being shaved," says Mark J. Stickney, DVM, clinical associate professor and director of general surgery services at Texas A&M University's veterinary medical teaching hospital.


This gist of the article is that you can shave an animal, but there's little reason to shave a cat, unless matting is a concern. Dogs might benefit more.

[–]e8dingo 4 points5 points ago

I think the pictures speak for themselves

[–]KefkaticFanatic 4 points5 points ago

The fur can get super matted and impossible to brush out, so the only real solution is a shave. Had to do it with my cat a few times, though he seems pretty happy after it's done. During the process, however, not so much

[–]tgjer 1 point2 points ago

My aunt has her cat (a maine coon) and dog (australian shepherd) clipped every summer, or they get so hot and miserable.

Also it cuts down on shedding.

[–]tamazin 1 point2 points ago

Surgery, but usually it's only necessary on a small area. My cousin's cat got really stressed out when they moved and all her hair fell out - but only from the waist down. Weirdest looking thing I've ever seen.

[–]awesomeman23 11 points12 points ago

Cat Face, he's got a big cat's face. He's got the body of a cat and the face of a cat, and he flies around 'cause he's got a cat face. Cat Face!

[–]SteelCity 0 points1 point ago

"flies through the air"

[–]awesomeman23 0 points1 point ago

Watch Cat Face on Weebl's Stuff. No really, fuckin' watch it. It's hilarious.

[–]SteelCity 0 points1 point ago

I have lol. It's brilliant. "There's no ash...flavoured with fish in here, there's no poopywood products that smell like beef!"

[–]1midnight2 2 points3 points ago

Creeper Kitty!

[–]lakai42 2 points3 points ago*

That looks like my cat.

This is him fluffy.

[–]UCIandWSU 0 points1 point ago

He looks like a bobblehead cat.

[–]CaptainCobalt 0 points1 point ago

The fact that he looks so happy and peaceful fluffy then serious and pissed off shaved definitely enhances the pictures.

[–]AdHawk 10 points11 points ago

Looks a bit like the Cheshire Cat from American McGee's Alice.

[–]yellowlines 7 points8 points ago

came here to say this! link!

[–]BaconSalad 3 points4 points ago

I think I like it, need to see more of the shaved kitty though - FOR SCIENCE!

[–]Temporaryy 1 point2 points ago

Looks like a creeper lol

[–]idonutcare 1 point2 points ago

oh god that scared me for a sec. Just prior to looking at this picture i was watching a documentary on eating disorders. so my first thought was...HOLY FUCK! AN ANOREXIC CAT! Then I read the title and my heart was at ease again.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

Why do people shave their cats? Is it if they live in a hot climate?

[–]Aparty 4 points5 points ago

Lots of reasons...

They don't like to be brushed and end up matted (which is painful). Some vets prefer you keep them shaved if this is the case because pain = stress. Stress (in cats) = UTI's (which can cause death rather quickly).

So fluffy they can't clean themselves effectively (especially when overweight).

Reduce number of hair balls.

Temporary partial relief of housekeeping duties.

It feels really cool, cat gets more attention.

Temperature can be a factor but mine is shaved all year and it's cold here in winter. He cuddles a lot to keep warm.

[–]grimpoteuthis 1 point2 points ago

Or the hair gets matted and is very uncomfortable for the feline.

If I remember correctly, matted fur can actually cause blood circulation issues? I might be wrong.

[–]IGoBumpInTheNight 1 point2 points ago

He looks like a chess piece. I like it.

[–]Natatos 1 point2 points ago

After reading the comments, I now have a strong urge to shave my cat.

[–]haiku_robot 2 points3 points ago

After reading the 
comments, I now have a strong 
urge to shave my cat.

[–]johnny_appletits 1 point2 points ago

Looks like my disproportionate penis :(

[–]cuttlefish1054 1 point2 points ago

Cat: "I will end you for this."

[–]peacelise 1 point2 points ago

You made me laugh out loud. hat tip

[–]Nissa_nissa 1 point2 points ago

Looks like a bobble-head.

[–]hullobirdy 2 points3 points ago

Shaving a cat is the most time consuming task to undertake. But the lack of cat hair is amazinggg.

[–]Aparty 5 points6 points ago*

When I hired a groomer to do my cat it would take her 45 minutes with my help. Decided one day to buy clippers and try it at home with my son helping me. Watched a YouTube video a few times on the subject and did it when he was relaxed (could never get him in that state at the groomers after the car ride). Took us 15 minutes.

Before: http://imgur.com/LMuil During: http://imgur.com/6Pj1C Inspection: http://imgur.com/0tYKs Happy: http://imgur.com/1tzL5

[–]Pemby 4 points5 points ago

Oh my god...look at that pile! You could make two more cats out of that.

[–]Ayden161 2 points3 points ago

It looks like a creeper from minecraft...

[–]LiteRobot 2 points3 points ago

Big head mode: ACTIVATED!

[–]BaconSalad 1 point2 points ago

I like 'em shaved. That's a nicely trimmed one you have there.

[–]dudenell 1 point2 points ago

But why?

[–]fr00bl3t 1 point2 points ago

I do prefer my pussy shaved.

[–]TehMWF 3 points4 points ago

That seems sort of cruel... it just looks so ashamed, stripped of its' identity, in a way. Then again, it also lets you know just how small the kitty beneath the fur is.

[–]Aparty 9 points10 points ago

Once they get past the initial embarrassment you see they're much more comfortable. Mine hates being brushed and he gets badly matted, it's painful. When he's shaved he's much more relaxed and happier because people not only pet him more but allow him to cuddle with them. When he's 20 lbs of fluff everyone shoos him away because they don't want to be covered in it.

[–]AutumnEmber 4 points5 points ago*

My cat looks like it instantly lost 20 pounds after being shaved. He may not like it much but thats less hairballs, shedding, and he feels amazing!

[–]cynical_douche 1 point2 points ago

Why would you shave a cat?!

[–]tgjer 1 point2 points ago

If they're long haired and an outdoor cat, it can get badly matted and filthy in summer. And it's painful and difficult to brush them constantly. Also, they get crazy hot.

They're embarrassed for a few days after being clipped, but then they forget about it and are much more comfortable.

[–]MaK_Ultra 0 points1 point ago

They lose the recently shaved looked right away too.

[–]virulentcode 0 points1 point ago

All this makes me think about is the Cheshire Cat from the PC game Alice.

[–]Jellypod 0 points1 point ago

I see a dog's face in the shaved part

[–]TheRandomDot 0 points1 point ago

that is the Talking Tom

[–]turk256 0 points1 point ago

I have like that same laptop.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Sadistic_Bear 2 points3 points ago

I wonder how much cat porn is on that laptop

[–]aazav 0 points1 point ago

I just shaved my black cat today. No cat fur all over the house.

He's gray underneath. At least a 3 tone paint job.

[–]Kazekid 0 points1 point ago

Its the Cheshire cat.

[–]yokubakura 0 points1 point ago

Should have just left the title "So you like silly looking cats."

[–]rfp_drew 0 points1 point ago

Does reddit like silly looking cats? Recent polls suggest yes. Also cute cats, funny cats, scary cats.... Any cats.

[–]noitsnotpleasestop 0 points1 point ago

This is a cat, not a kitty.

[–]sarahcasarah 0 points1 point ago

I've always, always wanted to do this. I just put my three boys on a diet. I'm sure they'd looooooove me even more if they each got new haircuts, too.

[–]Brightenup 0 points1 point ago

laundry day...it's a bitch!

[–]belt 0 points1 point ago

I'm not sure what I was expecting to see....oh... Wait, yes I do.

[–]brosenfeld 0 points1 point ago

I'm expecting to see its head bob up and down. Why you disappoint?

[–]toxinogen 0 points1 point ago

It looks like a disgruntled bobble-head.

[–]Fireyhunter 0 points1 point ago

Almost too sad to be funny. Almost.

[–]4thchamber 0 points1 point ago

[–]spicytim 0 points1 point ago

Immediately I thought of the Cheshire cat in American McGee's Alice.

[–]rhazelh 0 points1 point ago

God this is horrible!

[–]steelcitynorth 0 points1 point ago

There's a face of a dog on its chest.

[–]dingusmingus 0 points1 point ago

Looks like sssssSSSSSS BOOM.

[–]scookie11 0 points1 point ago

Reminds me of a creeper..

[–]spazmodic- 0 points1 point ago

We had a shaved cat like this once, and it really liked it when it got shaved. The cat was euphoric if you pet it when it had short fur like this.

[–]Orimos 0 points1 point ago

He looks like a bobble head lol

[–]dynamiteownsall 0 points1 point ago

For some strange reason, this reminds me of an Enderman.

[–]lindseypa 0 points1 point ago

Now all you need is a poodle to match

[–]omnomnomnomnomnomn0m 0 points1 point ago

I'm going to go shave my cat right now, this is amazing.

[–]FranklinFox 0 points1 point ago

I've been thinking of shaving my cat to wash him properly to get rid of some of the fleas, and also because he leaves giant bundles of hair everywhere and it's frustrating having cat hair all over my work clothes and having to vacuum twice a day, but my partner refuses to let me do it.

May have to just do it when she isn't around one day.

[–]Boater58 0 points1 point ago

Just wanted to say that I have the same laptop as the one in this picture.

[–]gaminggeek12 0 points1 point ago

Looks like a creeper. I WOULD HUG THE SHIT OUT OF THAT CREEPER

[–]Propie 0 points1 point ago

Reminds me of a creeper, but way cuter

[–]tokyokyoko 0 points1 point ago

It's always better shaved.

[–]PocketNicks 0 points1 point ago

Is that a baby Giraffe??

[–]transformer_tech 0 points1 point ago

Sitting on the crapper browsing /r/funny, I came across this image. Literally laughed so hard a little poop came out. Bravo.

[–]socko1234 0 points1 point ago

I fucking hate my friend! he put that comment, not me! Well redditors, word to the wise. DONT LET YOUR FRIEND GO ON YOUR REDDIT ACCOUNT! SHIT LIKE THAT HAPPENS!

[–]YaDshu 0 points1 point ago

reminds me of a creeper from minecraft...

[–]Iamsqueegee 0 points1 point ago

Bobblehead cat

[–]GS540 0 points1 point ago

omg its so cuteee!!!!

[–]thbgmck 0 points1 point ago

[–]macaronisalad 1 point2 points ago

Shaved doesn't have to mean completely bald. It can mean shorter hair, if it was shaved to be that way.

[–]jakemyers7 -1 points0 points ago

trimmed

[–]bencoveney 0 points1 point ago

Shaved just means to cut the hair short. If you're trying to push that no hair at all should be left, you're wrong. Without waxing there will be hair left, and trying to say that shaved refers to a particular specific length is futile.

[–]jakemyers7 -1 points0 points ago

Shaving is the removal of hair, by using a razor or any other kind of bladed implement, to slice it down to the level of the skin.

[–]macaronisalad 0 points1 point ago

I don't believe that cat's hair was just "trimmed".

[–]dudet24 -1 points0 points ago

Ok I have come back to this picture 3 times just to laugh at it again. I want a cat just so I can do this. But maybe just one part of the cat a day. Tail first I think.

[–]Katiechriste -1 points0 points ago

Looks like a damn tragedy. It will now try to kill you in your sleep.

[–]ramzie 0 points1 point ago

We need moar pics.

NOW!

[–]Take_a_better_photo -1 points0 points ago

Face the subject towards the light and take the photo with your back to the light source. That way the camera will not compensate for the brightness and under-expose the shot.

[–]SexyBarfingDog -3 points-2 points ago

[–]morlakai 1 point2 points ago

HIM. HE'S THE ONE THAT TOOK MY UPVOTE

[–]SirRonaldofBurgundy -2 points-1 points ago

Came here expecting vagina. Was disappointed.

[–]The_Stray_Wolf -2 points-1 points ago

geraffes are stupid

[–]War_Machine -3 points-2 points ago

This post is funny because that cat doesn't have enough hair.

[–]graysoncooper -2 points-1 points ago

interesting Toshiba you got there...

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]MaesterKyle -1 points0 points ago

Shaved Kitty..... Didn't mean what I thought it meant :(

[–]usemayonaise -1 points0 points ago

"Hey kids don't sniff cat piss M'kay"

[–]TheMattAttack -1 points0 points ago

Toshiba Satellite C655?

[–]kkkilla -1 points0 points ago

SFW

[–]chang_of_pace -5 points-4 points ago

hey, i have a toshiba too!

[–]Carnifax66 -3 points-2 points ago

Soon.

[–]gsmoses52 -3 points-2 points ago

am I the only one who see's a creeper cat?

[–]SHIT_COVERED_FIST -2 points-1 points ago

MAH NIGGUH