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top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]onlyincontext 149 points150 points ago

"On average, you both seem about right"

[–]gringobachatero 242 points243 points ago

You should have said "everything's relative" when looking at the skinny one.

[–]the_shit_I_say[S] 172 points173 points ago

If I had seen that coming I just would have said "Yup" and finished my set

[–]IsABot 120 points121 points ago

I think you're just polite. I would have immediately just said yes no matter what.

[–]dressiertugboat 38 points39 points ago

That's me in a nutshell. It must have been the way I was raised, but I just can never bring myself to be critical of people. Which kind of sucks as I'm moving into "boss" territory at work, and it's kind of important to be able to be upfront with people in that way. Damn my unwavering niceness!

[–]PAPAPI 1 point2 points ago

Just make sure you don't let yourself get pushed around because of it.

[–]f03nix 1 point2 points ago

Bots do that, they don't understand emotions that well.

[–]Amberry 18 points19 points ago

I'f I'D seen that coming, I'd tell them I think they're both fat. x_x

[–]vincidahk 1 point2 points ago

"Yup, fatty mc fat fat, you want a donuttttt?"

[–]FritzMeister 11 points12 points ago

Beat me to it. I love the All is relative line. It's the perfect answer to awkward questions, kind of like "So it has come to this." Is the perfect response to everything else.

[–]RobbieGee 19 points20 points ago

So it has come to this.

[–]NothingsShocking 5 points6 points ago

then winked one eye and made a little firing a gun with your thumb pointy finger at her.

[–]kromem 8 points9 points ago

Or go with the total nonchalant asshole route:

Pause, thinking. "No, I'm sure my junk will still fit inside, though I may need some assistance." (Then stare pointedly at the skinny friend.)

Derp questions get troll answers.

[–]lordhumunguss 176 points177 points ago

in cases like that, you say either "I'm not touching that with a 10 foot pole" or, better yet, "my attorneys have advised me against answering that line of questioning".

[–][deleted] 32 points33 points ago

Ahh, I'm pretty sure "I'm not touching that with a 10 foot pole" would be interpreted as you saying you're not touching the girl with a 10 foot pole. Which, that may be true, but I think you were trying to convey that you weren't touching the question with a 10 foot pole as to avoid conflict, and that interpretation would do precisely the opposite.

[–][deleted] 34 points35 points ago

The fat girl is so big I only need a 5 foot pole to get her.

[–]Tensuke 5 points6 points ago

"I wouldn't touch you with a 3 inch pole. Unless, you know, you were into that."

[–]lordhumunguss 1 point2 points ago

ha, I didn't mean it that way, but I could see how that could easily be misinterpreted.

[–]ZeMoose 24 points25 points ago

"That question's more loaded than your breakfast plate, fatty."

[–]sirukin 44 points45 points ago

I plead the fifth!

[–]ChillyCheese 24 points25 points ago

One-two-three-four-fif

[–]sundayultimate 12 points13 points ago

Telling the skinny girl that you wouldn't touch the overweight one with a 10 foot pole probably isn't the best choice

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

Were gonna need a field test to draw a proper conclusion

[–]CrazyBastard 1 point2 points ago

even better: "I don't know and I have no opinion"

[–]EEFred 51 points52 points ago

Next time, just call them on their bullshit. I fucking hate it when people, not just women, do this sort of shit.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

Agreed. I would just say, "Why would you ask a stranger such a sensitive question?" I doubt they would have a very good response.

[–]hypnotoadglory 34 points35 points ago

Why don't people simply say.

"Yes, she's fat"

If someone is obviously fat, or wearing a hat, or eating lego, YOU CAN FUCKING SAY SO!

Stop being a pussy and call a spade a spade.

[–]nickdude77 11 points12 points ago

Finally

I always say that being fat is like smoking - It's bad for you but you can quit if you try hard enough. Problem is, it's some sort of double standard. We're not allowed to tell them that they eat way too fucking much or they get upset, but if we told someone they smoke way too much, they'd probably (if enough people said it) try to stop.

[–]FatCat433 1 point2 points ago

"Do you think it's appropriate to say black, or must we say african-american to be politically correct?"

"Huh? Oh, I just call them all spades."

[–]skond 616 points617 points ago

As an old guy, I can tell you the best thing to do when a female asks you anything about her (or someone else) looking fat, being fat, or does this make anyone look fat: Become deaf, you never heard the question. No answer is the best answer.

[–]Linkmaster2010 273 points274 points ago

I usually fake a few sign language symbols or point to my ear and shake my head.

[–]ctswiss 886 points887 points ago

"I'm sorry, you're so fat I can't hear what you're saying over how fat you are."

[–]silenc3x 157 points158 points ago

you sound fat

[–]Vexing 44 points45 points ago*

It's the Bs.

[–]DaFlyingGriffin 41 points42 points ago

[–]BrownNote 41 points42 points ago

[–]BuzzzLightyear 9 points10 points ago

[–]heresyourhardware 6 points7 points ago

Gobs not on board.

[–]duckduckpony 2 points3 points ago

Clicked all of the above links expecting this one. Finally, thank you! Also, screw you for stealing my moment.

[–]zomgwtflolbbq 4 points5 points ago

[–]Breenburger 5 points6 points ago

Gob's not on board.

[–]thenordicspirit 3 points4 points ago

B word fat. i love you.

[–]cheaprug 2 points3 points ago

[–]navyation 2 points3 points ago

Beads?!?

[–]eloisekelly 2 points3 points ago

Every time I call a taxi they send me one of those big-ass 7 seater taxibuses. My brother says it's because I must sound fat on the phone.

[–]dougsanpedro 4 points5 points ago

"I'm not saying you're fat, but if I had to make a list of the 5 fattest people I know, you'd be 3 of them..."

[–]Shit_Apple 45 points46 points ago

I'm 22 and it just hit me that I'll never be that excited for my birthday again. Ever.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]CopyX 27 points28 points ago

You've never had a birthday in vegas.

[–]Iwantapetmonkey 189 points190 points ago

I'll fake a seizure... If they call me out on faking it, I'll piss myself, then bite my tongue, then pay for an ambulance ride, then take epilepsy medication for the next 20 years... whatever it takes to not answer that question.

[–]thomaswagner_91 16 points17 points ago

I can't believe you just quoted that! Upvote for you good sir or lady

[–]reparadocs 22 points23 points ago

What is it from?

[–]Murcus 54 points55 points ago

I googled it, and all it found was this thread.

[–]OIP 90 points91 points ago

shit just got meta

[–]azazelswatcher 1 point2 points ago

This.... I need to remember this!

[–]kent_eh 41 points42 points ago

Tim Allen's answer:

"I am Switzerland. I have no opinion"

[–]GeneralTomfoolery 6 points7 points ago

"I should also mention the kilo of coke I'm smuggling"

-Tim Allen

[–]manole100 3 points4 points ago

What happened to you that made you so... neutral?

[–]skvy 68 points69 points ago

Actually, I just comment on something mildly (if at all) related. For example:

"Do you think my friend is fat?"

"She's beautiful."

That way, I avoid the harm that telling the truth might cause in that case, and give a mild compliment in the place of the expected insult.

[–]Perelandra1 88 points89 points ago

"She's delicious"

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]DJsmallvictories 33 points34 points ago

Say it like James Blunt for bonus points.

[–]Thinks_Reddit_Is_RPG 6 points7 points ago

It's true.

[–]Kaltano 25 points26 points ago

Beautiful is in no way a mild compliment and shouldn't be used unless you really mean it and even then sparingly.

As a fat person, I can tell you we know how we look. The only people who can use a blatantly incorrect descriptive term and get away with it are our mothers. Everyone else we'd see as disingenuous or wonder if it was a "reverse" insult.

As for why this girl is joining her friend in whatever the hell that pop quiz was really about, I can't answer.

[–]fakestamaever 2 points3 points ago

What about BBWs?

[–]scarecrow1 2 points3 points ago

The fatter girl was probably having a strop/argument with her friend, and I think she pressed her skinnier friend into asking the OP, probably "to settle the argument" or somesuch,

[–]TalkingBackAgain 4 points5 points ago

I'm amazed by how the guys here try to dance around the question.

I don't care about that at all. Some woman asks 'does my ass look fat in those pants?' and if it does, I'll say 'yes'.

Don't ask me a question if you don't like what the answer might be.

[–]mewarmo990 1 point2 points ago

Yup. Whatever you do, don't answer the question.

[–]kurichan 79 points80 points ago

the only winning move is not to play.

[–]matari 39 points40 points ago

comparing the "fat" question with thermo-global nuclear war, I love it!

[–]kurichan 21 points22 points ago

this shits high stakes.

[–]the_traveler 11 points12 points ago

This shit's hot steaks.

[–]matari 4 points5 points ago

that hot shit stinks

[–]Tensuke 1 point2 points ago

Humor, ha ha!

[–]ringsta 1 point2 points ago

How about a nice game of chess?

[–]red321red321 19 points20 points ago

absolutely. plead the fifth.

[–]commedesfuckdown 3 points4 points ago

FIIIIIIIFFFFFF

[–]kubala43 13 points14 points ago

[–]CopyX 19 points20 points ago

ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIIIIIFFF

[–]LordOfHazard 43 points44 points ago

God bless my dearly departed friend Eric. He coached me in the ways of the pimp many-a-time. Here are some of his legendary words of wisdom:

When a girl asks you if she looks fat, only respond with one sentence, whether you mean it or not - "Shut up and let's fuck." Generous karma (the real kind, not the useless internet kind) will soon pour upon you, whether by her or by her hot-ass friends. THIS. TOTALLY. WORKS.

[–]Tensuke 1 point2 points ago

I'll allow it.

[–]pHreaksYcle 9 points10 points ago

The only way you can win the game is to not play.

[–]davidzlocker3 4 points5 points ago

There's two ways to look at this I think. Your way is valid...and then there's my way.

If someone asks me a question...I give them an answer. If they get mad at me for not answering "correctly". I tell them... "If you don't want to know what I think...don't ask the question" ...it's very simple. Some people think I'm an ass...some people love me for my honesty and will then actually value my opinion as a result. ...so it's a give and take I think.

[–]KALASH69 1 point2 points ago

Exactly, the only winning move with some women is to not play the game at all.

[–]NEEDS_MORE_GRAVY 1 point2 points ago

God's work.

[–]RedditRage 1 point2 points ago

Just say something like "I'd fuck you", or "I'd fuck her", and that usually ends the conversation the way it was meant to end.

[–]BZLuck 1 point2 points ago

Here's your answer: "I'm married, so I'm not allowed to answer that question. Ever."

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

I just call them on it.

"Are you seriously asking me that? Why the hell would you do that?"

And start laughing.

Though I did have one ex who was in excellent shape who would ask me if stuff made her look fat. I told her my answer would always be yes as my way of getting back at her for asking that question to begin with. She'd forget and ask me. I'd say "yes", and then she'd realize she did it again and break down laughing.

[–]madwickedguy 1 point2 points ago

Women who don't want the answer to a question shouldn't fucking ask it. I'm one honest mother fucker... If you ask me if you're fat, or if you look fat in those pants, I WILL tell you the truth. My wife and I are celebrating our 15 year anniversary this year, been that way since the beginning, and she appreciates me for it.

If you're a woman, and you fish for compliments because of your self esteem, don't get fucking mad when you don't get the compliment you're looking for.

[–]tripinbalz 85 points86 points ago

Man I wish that happened to me. I'm a personal trainer, could have scored a client or two. "Fat is such a nasty word, but I think you are beyond the healthy weight range. Easily fixable though, you obviously have a lovely bone structure and after a few months of training with me I think you'd look incredible. Is this time every week good for you?

[–]FatCat433 36 points37 points ago

"See! I told you every guy is just out to make me pay for personal training sessions!"

[–]MrsReznor 15 points16 points ago

You are a smooth talking personal trainer. I'd sign up if I had the cash. I miss having a trainer.

[–]HoverHand_For_Life 5 points6 points ago

I'll take 8. Haha, at last I am becoming a crafty exerciser...

[–]peetah74 58 points59 points ago

It doesn't matter what I think. What matters is if you're happy with the way you are.

[–][deleted] 33 points34 points ago

Then she would have said, "See, I told you all guys are full of shit". The only response you could use and not get flamed, is to get up and walk away. Or wear earphones.

[–]dressiertugboat 23 points24 points ago

That chick needs to stop assuming the worst. That can't be a fun way to live. :(

[–]GenericOnlineName 19 points20 points ago

"OMG why can't I find a man?

All guys are awful."

[–]RobbieGee 17 points18 points ago

Which is incidentally what "forever alone"-guys think about girls as well.

As soon as you step into the trap of having a negative outlook on everything and assume the worst, other people are going to pick up on it and avoid you because you are NO FUN to hang around with.

[–]wegotpancakes 1 point2 points ago

You're assuming the worst about all guys who are forever alone.

[–]kittenkat4u 1 point2 points ago

it can be really hard to though. if she(or others) have been bullied/teased/tortured about her weight for most of her life it becomes ingrained in who they are. it isn't a fun way to live.

[–]boon420 104 points105 points ago

Being polite to a stranger = being an asshole?

[–]JackassPenguinass 54 points55 points ago

Now you got it!

[–]doesnotexist1000 7 points8 points ago

Polite penguin!

[–]RandomPerson200 7 points8 points ago

Socially Polite Penguin.

[–]0gonzo0 1 point2 points ago

Oh, okay thanks, from now on I'll walk around being blatantly rude to everyone I meet.
You're a lifesaver JackassPenguinass. If I ever have any questions regarding social ettiquette, I know who to count on.
....... Dickwad.
^ (Did I do it right?!)

[–]Vidiem 1 point2 points ago

I would just have said: "You are obviously trying to make me feel awkward so yes, she's fat".

[–]AspectOf 74 points75 points ago

Their sample size is bad and they should feel bad.

[–]genderfucker 18 points19 points ago

So is OP's.

[–]BolshevikMuppet 233 points234 points ago

The problem with all of the "OMG, I can't win" is that different women react different ways to even the same thing.

Sure, some girls would freak out if you actually said "well, yes". But maybe she was looking for honesty. Generalizing about "that gender" isn't any more valid than her generalization about "all men."

[–]Frodoholic 79 points80 points ago*

Glad to see someone made this comment- it seems like a lot of times if a girl acts crazy, reddit takes it as an indicator of the way "women" are. When a guy acts crazy, that individual is a particularly bad person, but it doesn't say anything about the gender as a whole.

Edit: a word

[–]ettuaslumiere 53 points54 points ago

[–]ENKC 2 points3 points ago

See also: police.

[–]BonzoTheBoss 1 point2 points ago

It's because most stories on Reddit about women is when they're being eccentric or "crazy".

No one posts stories about all the normal women they know in their lives because that doesn't make for an interesting story and will either be ignored or even downvoted.

Let's face it:

"omg this girl was a total bitch to me, I couldn't give a right answer!" is far more interesting than

"Yeah so this girl asked me a simple question, I gave a straight forward answer and we continued our conversation like mature adults."

[–]Cptn_Hook 10 points11 points ago

As though they were ... people? With individual personalities?

Ohhhh -- You had me going. Almost got me, there. Almost got me.

[–]Caleo 17 points18 points ago

But maybe she was looking for honesty.

There's no winning response. On one side you're a liar, and the other you're a jerk!

[–]girlikecupcake 14 points15 points ago

If a question is asked and the person asking is truly seeking honesty, an honest answer will not make you out to be a jerk.

I had to convince my husband of that when we first started dating, and he's now comfortable answering without fifty layers of "shit" filter if I ask a question. I may not like the answer, but chances are he's not completely bullshitting me.

[–]sliced_lime 7 points8 points ago

See the problem is there's no way to know. Unless you know the person really well, the question is a trap. Answering is like playing Russian roulette, and it's always the guy who comes off looking like an asshole. I'd guess I'm not alone in experiencing many more women for whom the only correct answer is no than women who would appreciate the honesty. It's basically them saying "do you want to boost my self esteem?"

[–]Nurger 12 points13 points ago

Remain calm and say in a steady voice: "this is a trap, and you should be ashamed.". The do the ಠ_ಠ.

[–]kleinbl00 63 points64 points ago

Crazy knows no bounds, gender or otherwise.

[–]cvwilson 92 points93 points ago

I'm seeing a lot of generalization here, which is super lame. Those women were wrong for tricking you and for claiming you represent all men. But you're also in the wrong for claiming they represent all women. Assholes exist everywhere. Period.

[–]IcySeal 15 points16 points ago

Women have periods. Period.

[–]davy_crockett 338 points339 points ago

Why couldn't you just copy the text from your own Facebook post and make a self post here? Oh..

[–]woofers02 183 points184 points ago

Karma. Is it karma? It's karma, huh?

[–]Democritus477 103 points104 points ago

Who gives a shit? It was a decent post, why shouldn't he get some karma?

[–]hiccupstix 33 points34 points ago

Because the popular opinion on reddit dictates that nobody should be compensated for anything they've done, said, or accomplished, and profit is invariably the product of an evil mentality of insatiable greed, whether for actual money or karma. It's really that idiotic.

[–]the_great_ganonderp 40 points41 points ago

What the fuck is this aversion to people getting karma? It's how this fucking website works.

If you want a discussion forum without karma or ratings, then fuck off and go find one, there are plenty on the internet.

[–]Fuck-A-Statue 15 points16 points ago

Its like people getting pissed when their favorite band becomes popular. Why do you think they're selling their shit? Think they like living in a van?

[–]matt01ss 9 points10 points ago

Then I wouldn't have a chance to down vote Facebook posts

[–]t0kimonsta 4 points5 points ago

Really, why the fuck do you care? Oh...

[–]windsostrange 8 points9 points ago

I like seeing Facebook comments in situ. It sets the mood.

[–]Dukuz 2 points3 points ago

Same reason you asked a question you already knew the answer to.

[–]Arborgold 14 points15 points ago

Why does it bother you? Forgive my ignorance, but why is one way better than the other?

[–]Apogee15 1 point2 points ago

It's reddit's fault, a picture is MUCH more likely to get upvoted and seen than a self post.

[–]ResidentWeeaboo 1 point2 points ago

You took the words right out of my mouth. At least they didn't take their text document and turn it into a slow scrolling movie with heavy metal music and post it on youtube.

[–]scamperly 7 points8 points ago

The correct answer is: "Do you?"

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

Well to be fair, you did lie. In all seriousness I have been confronted with a similar situation in a bar and I told the truth without hesitation and without being cruel or mean. She never came back in and I got flak for it. But the bottom line in my world is, if you cannot handle the truth... don't fucking ask. People need to understand that and get over it.

[–][deleted] 75 points76 points ago

It has nothing to do with her gender. She's just a crazy person.

[–]ZombieBroad 37 points38 points ago

This is Reddit. There are no crazy people just crazy women. And if a man is crazy it's because of a woman.

[–]edk141 3 points4 points ago

What gets to the front page is not representative of the views of the entirety - or even the majority - of this site. Similarly, a hasty generalization made about women shortly after the event is likely not indicative of OP's actual views about all women, and even if it is, it's not indicative of anyone else's.

[–]sirukin 17 points18 points ago

Typical broad. Insinuating that the blame should rest squarely on men.

[–]Good_Guy_Graig 5 points6 points ago

I'm not falling for this. Yes she is fat. That is indeed why you two are at the gym, right?

[–]CopyX 4 points5 points ago

Here's how you handle it:

  1. Put your headphones back in.

  2. Go back to lifting.

You can't win with a loaded question. The only way to win is to not play the game. Refuse to play their game.

[–]sceptreofnarwhal 5 points6 points ago

Of corse you were on shock.

[–]VelAwesomeRaptor 22 points23 points ago*

Yup. All women act exactly the same way. Everywhere, in the whole world.

Edit: The above statement contains sarcasm. Proceed accordingly.

[–]pantsoffire 1 point2 points ago

What, you mean all crazy like with their menapauses and unicorn jizz?

[–]theweslawson[!] 21 points22 points ago

You can't win with assholes. Don't lump all women together like that just because you ran into two female assholes.

[–]AhhhClem 5 points6 points ago

At the gym? Be real and suggest what exercise would work on her particular physique. She is there for a reason.

[–]haltingpoint 4 points5 points ago

Alternate responses:

"Why would you ask someone you don't know something like that?" (protip, introduce yourself after saying that and start chatting up the cute one)

Or, the dodge "You're interrupting my workout."

Or the nice honesty "I wouldn't say fat, but she is overweight. But I really don't see why that matters to you."

[–]SnallTrippin 4 points5 points ago

...don't lie. /But I'm a dick.

[–]Why-Guy 3 points4 points ago

"That's what the two of you are here for, right?"

[–]zerotrash 3 points4 points ago

"I refuse to answer on the grounds that it may incriminate me."

[–]missbarajaja 3 points4 points ago

it's a trap! girls like that know what kind of response they're gonna get when they ask you that. if you said yes, you're an insensitive asshole. If you say no, you're a lying scumbag. honestly girls are stupid for even asking that question.

[–]Darkstrategy 2 points3 points ago

"Somewhat, but you have a pretty face," and then continue on with what you were doing. It's polite, honest, and encouraging all at once.

[–]HaHaBoom92 2 points3 points ago

I don't understand how being honest here would have hurt you. I mean you're in a gym; a place where people generally are going for self improvement. Frankly, trying to fill this girls mind with false information is a worse crime than damaging her pride. Honesty is a premium, don't let fear of offending someone stop you from telling the truth.

[–]genderfucker 2 points3 points ago

So when you encounter a man saying something stupid, do you say the same thing about their entire gender?

[–]Azozel 4 points5 points ago*

I can't believe all the liars here. The correct answer is "Yes." The end. Trust me, as someone who has been overweight I want to be told the truth.

Edit: I'm still overweight, but I recently lost 34lbs from my heaviest weight

[–]chemkitten 13 points14 points ago

fail whale.

[–]willmakavelli 6 points7 points ago

why post your own facebook status instead of just posting a text link?

[–]parker214 12 points13 points ago

Because Karma.

[–]GoodbyeDoggy 7 points8 points ago

Louis C.K said it best: “Here’s the difference, to me, between boys and girls: Boys fuck things up; Girls are fucked up. That’s the difference. Boys just do damage to your house that you can measure in dollars, like a hurricane. Girls, like, leave scars in your psyche that you find later, like a genocide or an atrocity… That’s the difference between boys and girls. And it becomes the difference between men and women, really. A man will, like, steal your car or burn your house down or beat the shit out of you, but a woman will ruin your fuckin’ life. Do you see the difference? Like, a man will cut your arm off and throw it in a river, but he’ll leave you as a human being intact. He won’t fuck with who you are. Women are nonviolent, but they will shit inside of your heart.”

[–]aogadbois 1 point2 points ago

Tell the truth dude.

[–]Mharbles 1 point2 points ago

First you ask if they want you to be honest or be nice, then you are blameless.

[–]bamboleo 1 point2 points ago

So the fat girl knows the skinny girl thinks she's fat, and the skinny girl acknowledges that the fat girl is fat.

[–]DaVincitheReptile 1 point2 points ago

I would have told her yeah, she's fat, but at least she's at the gym working on it.

[–]CravingSunshine 1 point2 points ago

Ok...look. I'm far from a crazy rage face feminist but the gender comment did irk me a bit. It probably irked me as much as the all men are liars comment irked him.

[–]mariokartmaster64 1 point2 points ago

Coral Springs!!

[–]Digitel 1 point2 points ago*

you should have said.. you mean like how much fatter is she than you? or just in general compared to the population?

either way she is fat, But dont smile.. and make it seem like you are the expert that they thought you were when they decided to come ask you such a question. Point out where she holds most of her weight and suggest surgeries since you know by her current physical and mental condition that diet and exercise are not enough for such a project like her friend.

Oh and never talk the over weight girl directly only to the one that asked the question

[–]Phuzzums 1 point2 points ago

"Yeah, you are overweight, but your friend is a bitch. You can fix weight problems, you can't fix bitch."

[–]MesioticRambles 1 point2 points ago

No you can't win. I would tell them outright the situation is "Hey, if I say yes you're gonna be offended, if I say no you're gonna call me a liar and then be offended. No matter what I answer with you're going to hear yes so I am not going to answer that question"

[–]fusihunter 1 point2 points ago

Try this next time.

"I only lied so you didn't kill yourself you fat bitch"

Then you'll get the "all men are assholes", but women dig that, so it's not so bad.

[–]acharmedmatrix 1 point2 points ago

Yay Florida!

[–]whatsasnozberry 1 point2 points ago

So you're stereotyping a gender because a couple members of that gender stereotyped you?

Classy.

[–]burntham77 1 point2 points ago

A better answer: "Look, are we three going to fuck or not?"

[–]beltinbacon 1 point2 points ago

Coral Springs, FL? I live in Fort Lauderdale!

[–]yourenotmydad 1 point2 points ago

copy paste that shit into a self post, fb screenshots are terrible. hell i can't go to a public place without overhearing what some asshole saw on facebook.

[–]CheesewithWhine 1 point2 points ago

Why the fuck do men have to tiptoe around a woman's weight like it's a minefield but women get to mock a husband who had his penis cut off by his wife?

[–]sushi_and_coffee 1 point2 points ago

Downvoted for sexist generalization.

[–]IonOtter 1 point2 points ago

Girl: "Is she fat?"

Me: "I'm afraid so, yes."

Girl: "Wow. An honest guy! Say, are you doing anything Friday night?"

Me: "Yes. My boyfriend."

[–]starcraftlolz 1 point2 points ago

Quit being so damn nice. That's the problem with fat people nowadays. All of their friends and family tell them that they don't need to lose weight that they look beautiful the way they are. NO. You're not healthy simple as that.

[–]ursa_major13 1 point2 points ago

It's her own damn fault for being a fat-ass bitch. I would in no way call myself skinny, I weigh 170 lbs, but even I'm not idiotic enough to ask a guy if I am fat and then bitch to him about how he is an asshole. Seriously, I apologize for my gender.

[–]PhilipScrewdriver 1 point2 points ago

You don't know the bitch, say yes.

[–]juicedoobie 1 point2 points ago

Bitches be crazy.

[–]Esgobarr 1 point2 points ago

This is why honesty is important, should have told her she is fat and that she needs to figure out a plan for losing that fat. BOO YA!!!

[–]rosebud_ep_sc 1 point2 points ago

That's the point when you pretend to not know the native language.

[–]Pickleduck 1 point2 points ago

tldr; she's fat AND a bitch

[–]furtiveraccoon 1 point2 points ago

[–]morgysmitty 1 point2 points ago

Should've been honest.

"Yes she's fat. No reason to sugarcoat it because she'd probably eat that too."

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

I dunno. I would have to see her naked first.

[–]mycatspajamas 1 point2 points ago

Sorry kiddo... ain't no winning with those two. You were caught in a trap no matter what you said. Some girls live for that shit, and that's what those two were looking for. Its trolling in the shrewdest way. Brush it off, homie.

[–]jimothyjenkins 1 point2 points ago

fucking A bro...that sucks. www.youtube.com/watch?v=YZstUnhT6eI

let this brighten your mood. pigeon kicking is an under glorified means of stress relief. ..i kid.

[–]skullmonkey420 1 point2 points ago

wow.... that sucks

[–]callmesuspect 1 point2 points ago

In all honesty, I would have replied "Well, I wouldn't use that word, but she is certainly overweight."

[–]nixeon_dead 1 point2 points ago

well he did lie...

[–]ElmoPea 1 point2 points ago

Coral Springs - that says it all