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top 200 commentsshow all 393

[–]LessLikeYou 367 points368 points ago

Headline: The Govenator Soft on Illegal Aliens

[–]SkrozSplitski 57 points58 points ago

Headline: Kha'bj-te Sain'ja Chi'yteiv Ooman (I'll let you research that)

[–]chcrouse 46 points47 points ago*

kha'bj-te - Maniac/Reckless
sain'ja - Warrior
chi'ytei - Embrace/Hug
Ooman- Human

edit: not sure if "Chi'yteiv" is a different conjugation or a typo, could be room for more research.

[–]Ted417 21 points22 points ago

... how......... aliens...

[–]wolfkillangelpants 7 points8 points ago

anyone else notice the Darth Vader Helmet in the crowd?

[–]Adrepok 5 points6 points ago

Are you a wizard?

[–]chcrouse 10 points11 points ago

No, just above average at Google. Same thing, really.

[–]AREYOUSauRuS 22 points23 points ago

Google translate doesn't have Predator to English..... :o(

[–]xfo 10 points11 points ago

Maniac warrior embraces humans

[–]theburz 5 points6 points ago

A quick Google Search brought up nothing....

[–]fani 1 point2 points ago

No results - http://www.bing.com/search?q=Kha%27bj-te+Sain%27ja+Chi%27yteiv+Ooman&form=OSDSRC

What is it? Language from Aliens/Predator movie?

[–]PelicanPop 14 points15 points ago

Woah...Bing.

[–]Yst 1 point2 points ago

[–]rcrockchd 4 points5 points ago

Haha forget Klingon this guy got his bingon

[–]fani 1 point2 points ago

Once you bingon, you don't bingoff.

[–]Brocktoon_in_a_jar 19 points20 points ago

It's about time Schwarzenegger's "One Ugly Motherfucker" immigration policy was repealed.

[–]TangoOscarDD 1 point2 points ago

This should have more upvotes.

[–]lanboyo 2 points3 points ago

He is very hard on female illegal aliens working in his household however.

[–]grotgrot 6 points7 points ago

Are you sure the alien is illegal? I mean is there actual legislation saying they have broken the law?

Presumably there is always the Al Capone fallback of claiming tax evasion.

[–]thedrew 5 points6 points ago

Pretty sure he bypassed a port of entry, and probably violated FAA regulations en route. Verdict: illegal.

[–]Etheo 1 point2 points ago

Headline: The Govenator Soft on Illegal Aliens Immigrants

Would have been a more sizzling headline.

[–]assblaster7 255 points256 points ago

GO AHHN! DO EHT! WHADDAAHYOU WAIDING FORRAH?? DO EHHHHHHHHHHT!

[–]Muffmuncher 86 points87 points ago

BILLEHHH

[–]Derpisaurus_Rex 70 points71 points ago

JAMIEEEEE! I AM DEH TURBO MAHHHHN

[–]fightswithbears 49 points50 points ago

CHAYMEE, PUTJA MUDDA ON DA FONE.

[–]SketchPills 11 points12 points ago

When reading these out loud, my voice slowly went from arnie to black man

[–]TurdFerguson78 3 points4 points ago

GET TO THE CHOPPA!!

[–]terdfergussen 1 point2 points ago

GIF DA PEEPLE AYRE!!

[–]KrazyEyezKilla 1 point2 points ago

EH! DAS MINE TURBO MAN DOLL!

[–]-omari 1 point2 points ago

DILLUN! YOU SANAVA BETCH!!!

[–]The_A_Drain 9 points10 points ago

You taught me baseball! And how to raff!

[–]hacx 5 points6 points ago

He would have been a fine American.

[–]pureskill 1 point2 points ago

I'll cry when I'm done killin'!

[–]hacx 1 point2 points ago

Your wife is in danger!

But I'm not married!

You are now - to America.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

he became a republican

[–]superwinner 37 points38 points ago

DERE TRYING TOOO TAKE MY TORITIIAAAAS

[–]xSGAx 30 points31 points ago

*spanish accent

I DONT KNOW WHO THIS GUY IS...BUT I WANT HIM AND HIS TORTILLAS, DEAD!

*explosions. Then cue deep voice

Little Tortilla Boy

[–]DerpFacedKiteFlyer 1 point2 points ago

Don Lafontane: He had one chance, and his chance was to fight back.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

[–]Pretiacruento 1 point2 points ago

Geez, thank goodness I wasn't drinking anything. I shouldn't laugh this hard at work, I definitely shouldn't

[–]bandwidthking 572 points573 points ago

I don't see the big deal about Arnold meeting Whoopi

[–]Split-Personalities 109 points110 points ago

Oh, you

[–]shigal777 246 points247 points ago

[–]Anal_Fuck_Pussy_Shit 110 points111 points ago*

Nooo You're supposed to post the human and get 20ish upvotes, and then someone posts the dog and get 300 upvoted, then someone posts the dog video and breaks reddit

[–]shigal777 45 points46 points ago

Video? What video?

[–]Chilaxicle 132 points133 points ago

[–]OhTheTallOne 37 points38 points ago

It automatically looped the video for me. I don't have the heart to stop it.

[–]Anal_Fuck_Pussy_Shit 11 points12 points ago

The top comment used to say "What are you doing?! scroll back up the dog is performing for you". I'd be stuck there for hours

[–]laddergoat89 11 points12 points ago

I love the SMW music.

[–]Chilaxicle 2 points3 points ago

Yea, that makes it for me as well.

[–]megadeus 5 points6 points ago

ಠ_ಠ MLP tags on a clearly unrelated YouTube video. For shame, uploader. For shame.

[–]crackshot91 4 points5 points ago

Clearly fishing for a particular audience. Slimy tactic. ಠ_ಠ

[–]Chilaxicle 2 points3 points ago

What nerve!

[–]shigal777 10 points11 points ago

Thank you for enlightening me

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

If you open it up in 5 or 6 tabs it sounds like a horrifying carnival ride

[–]asphyxiate 12 points13 points ago

The dog video.

Edit: DAMN. Just seconds too late.

[–]peterb0yd 11 points12 points ago

120 seconds, that is..

[–]Fabbyfubz 56 points57 points ago

[–]vaelon 4 points5 points ago

it's so much better like this

[–]Split-Personalities 33 points34 points ago

Still one of the best pictures on reddit

[–]HexAddict 3 points4 points ago

I will forever upvote this pic. The look on the dog is just so awesomely derp.

[–]Oxxide 3 points4 points ago

I got more of an awesomely "oh you" vibe, personally.

[–]rreyv 3 points4 points ago

Autoupvote.

[–]Glasweg1an 1 point2 points ago

Oh, you two

[–]superwinner 7 points8 points ago

Ted Dansen is one brave motherfucker.

[–]MaeveningErnsmau 16 points17 points ago

I'm going to shame you real quick; it won't hurt.

That was a rough time for the both of them. (Who's the better looking here? It's Whoopi at her best and Danson at his worst.)

Whoopi had just become a grandmother at 34 and was on and off of drugs. Danson was coming out of Cheers and was looking for a fresh start in all things when they started the affair (Danson was exiting his second marriage).

But they've both found their way. Danson ended up with Malcolm McDowell's ex-wife Mary Steenburgen, and anyone who's seen Back to the Future III can attest to her charms. And Whoopi, as far as I can tell, is no longer doing Hollywood Squares.

[–]BoshiBochi 4 points5 points ago

Ted Danson is better looking... it's Ted Danson. Whoopi's just such a balla it din't matta.

[–]Skizot_Bizot 1 point2 points ago

Ohhhh snap! Lol that got me laughing. Someone should send her this im sure she would appreciate it.

[–]gojirra 1 point2 points ago

[–]Jesus_luvs_Jenkem 28 points29 points ago

Funny thing is only a second later Arnold pulled Predator's arm out of his socket, and punched him in his thermal imaging face.

[–]DerivIT 86 points87 points ago

I'm so glad it's over, I was so tired of always having to get to the chopper.

[–]searingsky 17 points18 points ago

Arnold changed sides and is now teaming up with the predator.

We are all doomed.

[–]gregny2002 11 points12 points ago

Probably the plot of The Expendables 2.

[–]searingsky 24 points25 points ago

Hahahaha, plot.

Good one.

[–]PlatinumJack 2 points3 points ago

Only Barney Ross can save us now.

[–]wadsworthsucks 22 points23 points ago

I'm gonna have me some fun. . .I'm gonna have me some fun. . .I'm gonna have me some fun. . .

[–]Levit0 57 points58 points ago*

You are one... Ugly mudafucka....

[–]cpnHindsight 52 points53 points ago

[–]JohnnyCashed 29 points30 points ago

[–]jayjaypee 2 points3 points ago

All we need is Guile's theme song up in here.

[–]filmfiend999 16 points17 points ago

What's the matter, Dillon? CIA got you pushing too many pencils?

[–]shnee 14 points15 points ago

best scene of the movie. dont get me wrong - the movie was full of great scenes, but this was the best!

[–]xSGAx 15 points16 points ago

Best line goes to The Body.

"you're all a bunch of slack-jawed faggots. This shit will make you a god-damned sexual tyrannosaurus!"

[–]skamando 8 points9 points ago

That shot was absolutely glorious.

[–]Angeldust01 5 points6 points ago

[–]mad55 18 points19 points ago

You’re ghostin’ us, motherfucker. You give away our position one more time, I’ll bleed ya, real quiet … leave ya here. Got that?

[–]Monkeychimp 7 points8 points ago

I ain't got time to bleed.

[–]TangoOscarDD 1 point2 points ago

You got time to duck?

[–]filmfiend999 1 point2 points ago

Gonna have me some fun. Gonna have me some fun. Gon...

[–]FunfettiHead 197 points198 points ago

Israel and Palestine could learn a thing or two from these fine gents.

[–]niXor 29 points30 points ago*

[–]bigted41 13 points14 points ago

you accidentally a letter

[–]niXor 3 points4 points ago

thank you

[–]bigted41 18 points19 points ago

well shit now my comment doesn't make sense, ass-hat

[–]jarlry 7 points8 points ago

The people that matter will see through his lies and deceit and know that you are the true reason for his success. Or maybe not but I up voted you.

[–]niXor 2 points3 points ago

William!

[–]Squalor- 13 points14 points ago

Arnold Schwarzenstein: GET TO THE GAZAAA!

[–]Windows_98 48 points49 points ago

Or they could just have a threesome with some dude.

[–]Breathing_Balls 43 points44 points ago

How about Carl Weathers?

[–]finkalicious 96 points97 points ago

KONY 2012

[–]Kotev 12 points13 points ago

GET TO THE KONY!!!!

[–]Penleg 6 points7 points ago

get to the Coney?

[–]Trimm_Dich_Forever 1 point2 points ago

After you get Kony don't throw it away theres still going to go be plenty of meat on them bones. Just take it home, throw it in a pot, add some broth and a potato. Baby you a for a stew going

[–]CochMaestro 6 points7 points ago

"Now hold on there mr predator there is still meat on that bone..now you can take that home mix in some vegetables and baby you got yourself a stew"

[–]arrowheadt 2 points3 points ago

It's nothing but a couple of guys out there, two or three at the most! A fucking lizard...

[–]Alexxandros 6 points7 points ago

What does Kony have to do with this?

[–]mattclegg 24 points25 points ago

apparently they look similar

[–]Alexxandros 2 points3 points ago

Ah I see. I had a weird suspicion that Kony moonlighted as Carl Weathers, this made my admiration of him rather awkward.

Glad to see the actor is not the kidnapper of thousands of children.

[–]jarlry 1 point2 points ago

I saw that guy and he offered me some sort of acting workshop, and thankfully I just barely had enough to pay for it. Anybody know if this is legit?

[–]wuzizname 1 point2 points ago

Or Billy!.

[–]mr-peabody 16 points17 points ago

[–]HoradricNoob 5 points6 points ago

Artists these days. /sigh

[–]niXor 3 points4 points ago

Someone please talk to their PR Agents and ask them to initiate talks in the Middle East.

[–]cannabist 2 points3 points ago

I spend too much time on this fucking site . . .

[–]iamsofakingwetodded 1 point2 points ago

One of the two would have to self destruct first..

[–]Ozymandias12 14 points15 points ago

Darth Vader's in the audience weeping because he never reconciled with Obi-Wan

[–]s9b1j4 1 point2 points ago

Are you kidding me that I had to scroll this far before I found a comment about Vader being in the audience.

[–]uk2knerf 35 points36 points ago

Arnold Schwarzenegger is the manliest man to ever live.

[–]wadsworthsucks 36 points37 points ago

[–]uk2knerf 27 points28 points ago

Still manly.

[–]lud1120 17 points18 points ago

Wo-manly!

[–]Nj_all_day 1 point2 points ago

WOLOLO

[–]brandinb 5 points6 points ago

Arnold as a woman is manlier than any man to ever live.

[–]womanisadangercat 10 points11 points ago

I'm reserving judgement on his manliness until I see him fix a car and build some furniture...

[–]uk2knerf 12 points13 points ago

I have no doubt he can do both. Do not doubt the Terminator.

[–]el_pinata 1 point2 points ago

After all, he has detailed files.

[–]dewhashish 3 points4 points ago

at the same time

[–]SensibleMadness 1 point2 points ago

He can destroy a car and an entire living room set in one shot, surely that must count for something.

[–]patssle 1 point2 points ago

Sweet... so as a 5'11" 145 lbs guy with glasses - I have a high level of manliness because I work on my car!?!

[–]NinjaViking 4 points5 points ago

From a 5'6" 180lbs guy with glasses who works on his car - yes.

[–]Ted417 1 point2 points ago

From a 5'7" 125lbs guy without glasses who doesn't work on his car - I need some glasses then I'll be much manlier.

[–]NinjaViking 1 point2 points ago

You have to make sure they're manly enough, though.

[–]yogabbagabba69 1 point2 points ago

Nope, that comment pretty much killed any manliness you may have had.

[–]codernaut85 8 points9 points ago

"I'm sorry I called you an 'ugly motherfucker'.

"I'm sorry I came to your planet and killed all of your squad".

hugs

[–]Barb0 4 points5 points ago

From the thumbnail I thought that Chris Hansen had finally caught the bastard.

[–]reidhershl 5 points6 points ago

"Using mud to hide yourself from my advanced tracking equipment... Genius!"

[–]krackbaby 4 points5 points ago

Predators hunt humans because they are dangerous and intelligent

[–]HookDragger 1 point2 points ago

Clay does have some decent thermal resistance properties.

[–]pi_over_3 6 points7 points ago

Jesse Ventura expressed regret at not being able to attend. He citing a busy schedule, saying "I ain't even got time to bleed."

[–]strattonbrazil 4 points5 points ago

Saw Predator again a couple years ago. That movie still holds up!

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points ago

He was probably looking to get some votes.

[–]logged_n_2_say 31 points32 points ago

the predator monster voting block wasn't very visible in the last election

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

Oh, my bad, I thought that was Octomom.

[–]CreamCityZ 4 points5 points ago

If It Bleeds we can kill it!

[–]merpes 1 point2 points ago

I aint got time to bleed.

[–]Normalcy_Bias 8 points9 points ago

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

But that legit handshake seals the deal

[–]lud1120 1 point2 points ago

You sort of look like a young Bill Gates.

[–]never_silent 1 point2 points ago

You are one ugly mudafuc...oh wait. Sorry, wrong thread.

[–]Tr0llphace 2 points3 points ago

too bad he doesn't respect you, you don't even lift weights. Predator on the other hand is jacked.

[–]Normalcy_Bias 2 points3 points ago

yeah, i was a fatty then. i'm in much better shape now. this was two years ago.

[–]wadsworthsucks 3 points4 points ago

One ugly motherfucker.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

Monday, May 7, 2012 - Former California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger begins negotiations with the lead attorney for Maria Shriver. (Photo/John McTiernan)

[–]fairly_quiet 2 points3 points ago

Monday, May 7, 2012 - Former California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger begins divorce negotiations with Maria Shriver. (Photo/John McTiernan)

ftfy

[–]mCat85 3 points4 points ago

GET TO THE CHOPPA!!!!!!!!!

[–]OP_karma_whores 42 points43 points ago

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title comnts points age /r/
Give peace a chance! 1com 7pts 4dys funny

source: karmadecay

[–]sammasati 4 points5 points ago

Impressive how much of a difference a good headline can make.

[–]White_Luigi 2 points3 points ago

And timing. I think the older headline is better, personally.

[–]whoadave 1 point2 points ago

And lots of luck. The main audience of reddit might find something worth upvoting, but it will never reach them if the specific knights of new who happen to see your submission first don't think much of it.

[–]oest 2 points3 points ago

I really thought she would hate him after she found out he had that love baby with the maid. Good for you, Maria.

[–]stvb95 2 points3 points ago

Also Vader was there to see this reunion

[–]molrobocop 2 points3 points ago

"What's the matter? The Predator Bureau of Statistics got you pushing too many pencils?"

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

how does arnold think about this? Does he see it as a photo opp? a publicity stunt? or does he find meeting a man in a predator costume fun? or just another lame event? I ask this because he probably doesn't view the predator movie like anyone else.

[–]elementalrain 2 points3 points ago

If you guys haven't watched Predator: The Musical yet...you SHOULD.

[–]Ceraz 2 points3 points ago

Is that Darth Vader in the crowd? :O

[–]Stumbling_Sober 1 point2 points ago

That woman on the left is getting a great shot of the back of someone's head.

[–]NinjaDiscoJesus 1 point2 points ago

No chance of a real sequel?

[–]sweeptheaorta 1 point2 points ago

Dillon's lookin a little strange these days

[–]roger_ 1 point2 points ago

Care to repost on /r/ArnoldSchwarzenegger?

[–]tiredofthehate 1 point2 points ago

holy repost batman

[–]Nightst0ne 1 point2 points ago

Stick Around!

[–]Mathari 1 point2 points ago

"I'm reallllly sorry about calling you ugly. It was uncalled for and I just feel awful about it."

"Thank you. That apology really means a lot coming from you."

[–]6CAVE_CLOUD9 1 point2 points ago

"You son of a bitch"

[–]Da_zero_kid 1 point2 points ago

"Soory for that mixup down in Guatemala, no hard feelings?"

"aaAAACH, No problemo."

[–]arrowheadt 1 point2 points ago

For the uber nerds, I'll just put this here.

[–]GAD604 1 point2 points ago

I love the smile on Arnie's face. He's getting a real kick out of this.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

Greatest top post on reddit EVER

[–]abrahamisaninja 1 point2 points ago

GET TO THE CHOPPA!!

[–]geefer_sutherland 1 point2 points ago

You win Monday this week.

[–]totalhater 1 point2 points ago

Get to dee choppaaa!!!!

[–]noagendaproducer 1 point2 points ago

Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.

[–]ibisum 1 point2 points ago

A: "hey .. rememba that time you blew up in a big cloud of nuclear smoke .. "

P: "yessss... and the time you took a big, sloopy bath .. in MUD .. yesss"

A: "ha ha, austrian beer is the best. good times, good times."

[–]AndyDeepFreeze 1 point2 points ago

Either that is a very short predator or Arnold is a lot taller then I remember.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

Very short predator. Arnold is shorter than they make him out to be in movies.

[–]Lazerus42 1 point2 points ago

[–]Minifig81 1 point2 points ago

After the Rocket Sled of Friendship, Predator has really gone soft on humans. :/

[–]nkLottery 1 point2 points ago

Dillon must be inside the Predator...that son of a bitch!

[–]NoMoreNicksLeft 1 point2 points ago

Would have been even more fun had he screamed at the top of his lungs and started beating the shit out of the guy in the costume. Then plead innocent at arraignment.

What juror would vote guilty for that, after all?

[–]5hinycat 1 point2 points ago

Bet it's awkward with his friend's skull just hangin there

[–]growling_owl 1 point2 points ago

"Ice to meet you!"

[–]chuckles2011 1 point2 points ago

Get to the choppah!

[–]Clopanon 1 point2 points ago

Reddit should arrange a surprise meet up of the Predator and...

...Wait for it...

Chris Hanson.

[–]j-fromnj 1 point2 points ago

get to da choppa!

[–]palordrolap 1 point2 points ago

HAH HAH HAH DIS COSCHOOM IS GREAT MAN HAH HAH HAH WHEYER DIT CHOO GET IT HAH HAH HAHGHGHHGHGHG HELP HE'S REEEEEAL

[–]MilwaukeeNative 1 point2 points ago

From the thumbnail, I thought this was Al Gore shaking hands with Manbearpig. Either scenario is a win-win.

[–]lukethecouch 1 point2 points ago

I was sorely disappointed when I enlarged it and found it to not be Gore and Manbearpig.

[–]OrtizKid 0 points1 point ago

This is an amazing photo.