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top 200 commentsshow all 248

[–]SushieMaker 163 points164 points ago

[–]Grand_Theft_Audio 133 points134 points ago

that's like automotive bukkake.

[–]illmatic707 57 points58 points ago

It is a Japanese car...

[–]anti_song_sloth 43 points44 points ago

[–]AppleBlossom63 2 points3 points ago

Let me sing you a song...

[–]hmchammer 7 points8 points ago

[–]orange_kevin 7 points8 points ago

I heard that seagull is a Rihanna fan.

[–]zedrahc 3 points4 points ago

hahahha was totally not expecting that.

[–]MeNicolesta 0 points1 point ago

fact.

[–]drunken1 260 points261 points ago

Congratulations. You are now the proud owner of the most annoying bird on the planet.

[–][deleted] 38 points39 points ago

Can you imagine how much more garbage there would be without them though? Necessary evil.

[–]brettyh 116 points117 points ago*

When I was very young, I was enjoying a delicious cheeseburger on a pier in Santa Barbara. Naturally, there were a lot of birds around but I never really thought anything about it, assuming they were so fearful of people they wouldn't dare come within grabbing distance. Anyways, I looked forward to being able to enjoy one of these particular cheeseburgers because every time we went to go visit my aunt every summer I would get one. It was cut in half and I was very hungry so I gobbled down the first half quickly. As I prepared to enjoy half number 2 I had become annoyed with the sun in my face and I went to switch seats to the other side of the table so I would no longer be facing it. As I did this a brave seagull swooped down and picked up the other half of my delicious burger. The mother fucker swallowed it in one gulp. The horror of the rest of my food now gone at the hands of this smug looking bird now staring at me from the nearest perch enraged me. I went to catch the bird but it flew away, evading me easily. I was hungry for the rest of the day because my mom wouldn't buy me another burger. Ever since this day I have hated seagulls and every time I see one get hurt I smile a little. I will never forget that day.

[–]Yeffers 64 points65 points ago*

When I was in grade 2, my family had just emigrated from Russia to Australia so I couldn't really speak any English. My class went on an excursion to an aquarium, and as we sat down on the grass outside to have lunch, a seagull swooped down and flew away with the paper bag which contained my sandwich. I got really pissed off at the seagull, but I couldn't communicate adequately to my teacher what had happened, so she thought I was just chucking a tantrum and I got in trouble (forced to sit away from the other kids or some such). Ever since then I have held grudges against seagulls and bad teachers.

[–]yakkafoobmog 1 point2 points ago

I bet you have the most interesting accent. Is it colored at all by either the Russian or Australian? Or some combination?

[–]Yeffers 0 points1 point ago

It's actually almost 100% Australian because I didn't really speak Russian to anyone other than my grandparents after I moved. People are usually shocked when I tell them I wasn't born in Australia.

[–]Gladestalker 9 points10 points ago

an upvote for your pain

[–]ClampingNomads 7 points8 points ago

Llandudno, Wales, 1998. I was sitting on a bench eating fish and chips as nature intended, but a crowd of gulls is getting a bit too pushy, which happens in places like this where dipshit tourists feed seagulls and they get bold... whatever, I'm ignoring them, meal resting on my knees, guzzle guzzle...

A herring gull the size of a large turkey crawled underneath the bench I was sitting on, appeared between my knees, knocks my dinner high into the air, hence all over the floor, and a massive fight erupts amongst the birds.

Only time I've ever seriously attempted to kick a wild animal out of spite (and I've been to Trafalgar Square). I missed. I've never been back to Llandudno, the memory is too painful.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

tl;dr Got owned by a gull, he mad.

[–]BonzoTheBoss 2 points3 points ago

I was at the seaside once and saw a seagull swoop from a building and literally attack a woman until she dropped the bag of pastries she was carrying and run off.

Those fuckers are dangerous, I hate them. I always throw stones at any seagull that gets too close to me when I'm trying to eat.

[–]Zhang5 2 points3 points ago

One summer I was on the beach eating some clam cakes from the snack shack. I'm talking to my friend and just holding the piece I was eating at the time in my hand. Goddamn seagull swoops down, hits me in the head with it's wing, and snatches my food right out of my fucking hand. Earlier in the day we also witnessed a small boy with a sandwich crying and being chased by several seagulls. Sadly he dropped the food for the evil demon-birds before we had a chance to chase the bastard things off. I'm totally with you in not liking them.

[–]quintinza 12 points13 points ago

Oh but they can work to your advantage if you have bratty shit kid tendencies like I had.

Went on holiday to Sodwana about twenty five years ago, and there was a toon of these squawking things around.

I marveled at how they would swoop down to snatch chips from me. Naturally I attracted what seemed like every living seagull on the Natal coast, and this irked some of the other beach goers. My mom admonished me in her polite manner to stop feeding these demons, and I complied, eventually...

One of the other beach goers, a fattish dude, lifted his head from his little sand and towell pillow and yelled something ugly at my mom.

Nine year old me, of course, would not stand for a dick talking to my momma like that, so I ran over to him, a hundred odd seagulls in tow, and upended my bag of crisps on him and his wife.

Cue a live re enactment of "Birds" on the beach.

It was beautiful... worth the spanking I got later :-)

[–]umop3pisdn 1 point2 points ago

When I was a little dude, a seagull landed on my head and stole my donut I was eating on the way to my mouth.. I was furious

[–]SODA_IN_MY_PUSSY 2 points3 points ago

How often do you see seagulls getting hurt?

[–]JDNelson13 2 points3 points ago

...Soda in your pussy...?

[–]end42 0 points1 point ago

Google it.

I DARE you.

[–]Dr_Professor_R 0 points1 point ago

I DOUBLE DARE YOU MUTHAFUCKA!

[–]sr20inans2000 0 points1 point ago

is it the whole bottle or the liquid itself?

[–]Donjuanme 0 points1 point ago

you're talking Habitburger!..... or Brown Pelican (snob)? <3 Santa Barbara!

[–]jotch 0 points1 point ago

Similar thing happened to me once, and I threw a soccer ball I had with me at the bird and knocked it out of the air, it fell into the water and I felt like a dick. It came around a few minutes later and flew away. Everyone was staring at me.

[–]KoreanEdelweiss 23 points24 points ago

Mine?

[–]maximumdose 4 points5 points ago

Congratulations. You now have Avian Flu.

[–]first_redditd 0 points1 point ago

Obviously you've never met a cockatoo!

[–]dudeabides86 0 points1 point ago

Nah crows man, kill them all.

[–]SourCreamWater 0 points1 point ago

As a person living on the coast that has smaller birds that like to call at 2:30 am in his yard, I strongly disagree that seagulls are the most annoying. Sea gulls pretty much keep to themselves...unless you're literally having a picnic on the beach or a dock.

[–]BanditoRojo 56 points57 points ago

I never could catch those things. Evolution points for him.

[–]nathris 75 points76 points ago

If you hold down + B it improves the catch rate.

[–]zedrahc 6 points7 points ago

you can also move the arrow buttons side to side in rhythm with the ball

[–]gargamak 15 points16 points ago

No

just

MASH

A

[–]commonplatypus 1 point2 points ago

I successfully caught one at the tender age of 12 once. I proceeded to drag him, but first, with my hand behind his neck (Cause of biting) towards a towel so I could wrap him in it to bring him home. A lifeguard yelled at me and I released him so that I could make my escape.

I caught him the same way this guy did.

[–]dmarch17 101 points102 points ago

Seagull here. That was my best mate. If anyone has any word on his status, please let me know.

[–]Hbaus 52 points53 points ago

He's currently detained pending an investigation in a sandwich larceny case. That's all I can say for now.

[–]Le_Karma_Whore 5 points6 points ago*

Seagull Surgeon M.D. here, he's currently in ICU in the injured wing of the hospital.

[–]getwooked 1 point2 points ago

dont worry man. we have an agreement with you seagulls.

[–]boomfarmer 1 point2 points ago

Faker. That's an Arctic tern.

[–]Ben_Anas 0 points1 point ago

I don't think that's an Arctic tern. Looks more like a Laughing Gull.

[–]boomfarmer 0 points1 point ago

Or a Franklin's Gull. You are right, though. The head of the bird in question is all-black, not black-on-top.

[–]drunken1 94 points95 points ago

Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine.

[–]jacobo 8 points9 points ago

[–]convulsus_lux_lucis 31 points32 points ago

They do this down in Newport all the time. The moment you aren't with your shit the seagulls start digging around looking for food. Rats with wings.

[–]rockymountainoysters 14 points15 points ago

This is how I've always referred to pigeons.

[–]bloodlok2 1 point2 points ago

I've always heard gulls are just sea-going rats with wings. Or alternatively sea-going vultures.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]greenbee202 4 points5 points ago

shit vultures sailing on the shit winds of a shiticane

[–]convulsus_lux_lucis 2 points3 points ago

Rocking like a shiticane?

[–]mtc10012 1 point2 points ago

Be careful out there, the shit winds are blowing Rickey. You just might find yourself in the middle of a shitstorm.

[–]03Titanium 1 point2 points ago

That is how I've always referred to pigeons after playing GTAIV.

[–]orange_kevin 0 points1 point ago

The thing here being that pigeons are actually quite clean, or so I've heard. They do not have many diseases whatsoever, especially when compared to sewer rats.

Then again, I may be completely wrong, and I will fully accept someone proving otherwise.

[–]kejeros 0 points1 point ago

I know that feel, bro. I go into the water for 5 minutes at 15th and my perfect fucking burrito (wrapped up and hidden) is destroyed. It was a sad time.

[–]lickachiken 61 points62 points ago

i love how he victoriously raises it at the end

[–]Martian_Cthulhu 10 points11 points ago

He must raise his bounty to the gods!

[–]cnostrand 3 points4 points ago

Bringing it up to the perfect height for the bird to crap on him.

[–]JayKaos 0 points1 point ago

Yeah the guy's reaction is the best part of this, the open mouthed amazement at pulling it off segueing into the triumphant roar of victory.

[–]spases 9 points10 points ago

like the dog/car conundrum... what happens now that he caught it?

[–]fucksmith 8 points9 points ago

He wins.

[–]pileosnafu 3 points4 points ago

^ Happy Cake day, now show me a kitten

[–]fucksmith 10 points11 points ago

[–]runs-with-scissors 2 points3 points ago

OH MY GOD. Was not expecting.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

watch the world burn.

[–][deleted] 328 points329 points ago

I SURE HOPE SEAGULL BRO WAS OK!

THAT DIDN'T LOOK ALL THAT GENTLE :\

[–]hartlocker 74 points75 points ago

Haven't seen you in a while andrew!

[–]Tashre 50 points51 points ago

Nice try, POLITE_IN_REDDIT1986.

[–]Buttfluff 16 points17 points ago

IIRC he broke one of the seagulls wings.

[–]runs-with-scissors 9 points10 points ago

Aw, crap. This is why we can't have nice things.

[–]Oelund 2 points3 points ago

If you watch the video you can see it fly away after he let it go.

[–]drgk 15 points16 points ago

At this point, the average Redditor would now demand your source and whine petulantly if you could not produce at least one mainstream media report or scientific study.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

whine petulantly

COMMEEEE ONNNNNNNNNNNN

[–]on_the_redpill 1 point2 points ago

I came here with that exact demand

[–]Major_Dick 11 points12 points ago

Seagulls don't feel pain and they welcome death with open arms!

[–]AltoidNerd 5 points6 points ago

[–]neotsunami 2 points3 points ago

OMG! Seriously? this exists?...I'm done with reddit today...just...no...

[–]spacechaser 0 points1 point ago

subscribed...

this is how you turn that monday frown upside down

[–]Sotordamotor 23 points24 points ago

Once again humanity shows his dominance over nature.

[–]Consensual_Rex 19 points20 points ago

Yeah animals have been gettin alittle uppity lately. Sometimes we gotta remind 'em who gots the opposable thumbs.

We'll cross the ape issue later

[–]87broseidon 2 points3 points ago*

I blame Tilikum. He's committed three cold and calculated murders, and no one even cares. I swear he's going to have to shoot up a school or something before he's finally brought to justice...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tilikum_(orca)#Incidents

[–]Sotordamotor 0 points1 point ago

Its not about thumbs its about our intelligence and adaptability.

[–]sp00kyd00m 0 points1 point ago

somewhere werner herzog is ecstatic.

[–]easyeight 0 points1 point ago

Genesis 1:26. Bitch.

[–]Solix 7 points8 points ago

Take him to the water and set him free... Wtf its a bird...

[–]Von243 1 point2 points ago

That's so much funnier when you just read it...

[–]Consensual_Rex 15 points16 points ago

When she released it, I was kinda hoping the Seagull would've made an example out of her.

[–]Jazzremix 1 point2 points ago

I thought it was going to shit on her stomach after the towel hit the ground.

[–]libertyordeath11 21 points22 points ago

"Let him come on top of you." lol

[–]account512 46 points47 points ago

LOL! I read the top youtube comments too!

[–]Prozaca 11 points12 points ago

That is why he put in in quotes.

[–]rakling 4 points5 points ago

I think you accidentally a word.

[–]cords55 0 points1 point ago

I didn't!

[–]slagdwarf 1 point2 points ago

Growing population of Reddit

[–]MrKrazybones 2 points3 points ago

Poor seagull

[–]TehKashmirZ 4 points5 points ago

At a beach on Lake Michigan a few years back, we saw a group of Hispanic gentleman doing this, with a towel that had chips sprinkled on it covering the guy. They were twisting the seagull's necks and throwing them in the back of chevy astro van.

[–]Waiting_in_a_Eye_Que 1 point2 points ago

Burritos, anyone?

[–]tarraaa 20 points21 points ago

But... Why? Why would you do this !!!!!!

[–]bubbaholy 15 points16 points ago

Well, a contributing reason is that some seagulls are a well known halfway-decent substitute for bald eagle meat.

[–]boomfarmer 0 points1 point ago

Terns, like the bird in this video, are stringy, gamy meat.

[–]JorgeCS 0 points1 point ago

Not as good as koala if you ask me.

[–]Donjuanme 1 point2 points ago

did you know the zoo can ban you for life for bringing a Hibachi?

[–]warboy 0 points1 point ago

You too?

[–]Ewan_Whosearmy 0 points1 point ago

I've got the heart of a lion, but now I'm banned from the zoo.

[–]pileosnafu 1 point2 points ago

Happy cake day

[–]iaburton 8 points9 points ago

That's not funny. That's how my grandpa died.

[–]mastergangles 10 points11 points ago

Your grandpa was a seagull?

[–]sotech -1 points0 points ago

My grandpa was a carpenter. He built houses, stores, and banks.

[–]carlosdglez 4 points5 points ago

lunch!

[–]Jsocia 20 points21 points ago

[–]IHavFoodStamps[!] 6 points7 points ago

I was more shocked than humoured

[–]Stones25 2 points3 points ago

...Now what do I do with it?

[–]Personsen 1 point2 points ago

Eat it to gain its powers

[–]trixter21992251 2 points3 points ago

A man's gotta eat.

[–]BrookMorrison 2 points3 points ago

"Honey, we're eating good tonight!"

[–]localanti 2 points3 points ago

Wow, I haven't seen this gif in years!

[–]athehelm 8 points9 points ago

I'm 90% sure that's a repost.

[–]kelustu 8 points9 points ago

from less than a month ago.

[–]Sirusavath 0 points1 point ago

It still made me laugh, even thought I've seen it before.

[–]IwillMakeYouMad 1 point2 points ago

That was a navy seal

[–]darkera 1 point2 points ago

Looks like meat's back on the menu.

[–]lord_james 2 points3 points ago

[–]killer4u77 1 point2 points ago

And then it craps on him

[–]doitleapdaytheysaid 1 point2 points ago*

To everyone that wants to see the actual video here's the link.

[–]PhillyCheeseBlunt 1 point2 points ago

HAH! me and some friends did the same thing years ago on Catalina Island when I was there for boy scout camp. The look on the seagulls face when we caught it was priceless.

[–]bright151 1 point2 points ago

You caught a Seagull!! Would you like to rename the wild Seagull?

[–]GandalfTheFunky 1 point2 points ago

Wash your hands!

[–]yep45 1 point2 points ago

Why would you want to catch one?

[–]SuperTurtle 1 point2 points ago

Good job, Micheal Phelps!

[–]hot4belgians 1 point2 points ago

one good tern deserves another!

[–]marvelous_molester 1 point2 points ago

This seems like a pretty viable technique if you're ever stranded on an island.

[–]Crap_Sally 1 point2 points ago

Back when I still went to church we did a church picnic at the beach. The pastor's son was trying to catch seagulls and eventually got sick of it and just tried hitting them with a football. Well, he hit one and everyone laughed. Sadly, it turned ugly quickly because he accidentally broke its wing. Well, the DNR was called and he gave some motivational speech about nursing it back to health at a rescue preserve over in Holland, MI. As he walks away we noticed that he grabs the end of the bird, walks around the other side of the bathroom hut and smashes the life out of it.

As he comes back to his truck, we noticed he didn't have a bird with him, or a cage. That's when we knew. Seagulls are annoying, but poor thing. It couldn't survive with a broken wing.

[–]Dexter_of_Trees 1 point2 points ago

Well you have ruined my plans for tomorrow..

[–]ANZACATTACK 1 point2 points ago

Terned out better than expected.

[–]Rob9159 1 point2 points ago

Congratulations, you caught a Wingull

Give it a nickname? Yes/No

[–]RileyKamikaze 1 point2 points ago

I just had a rush of pride come over me while watching this lol

[–]TheTrueIrishMan 1 point2 points ago

Bear Grills goes to the beach??

[–]ninjagummybear 1 point2 points ago

A seagull flew into my face once. Like straight into my face.

[–]CountMalachi 1 point2 points ago

This also works on small children.

[–]milouhi 1 point2 points ago

ok, im leaving work and going to the beach right now!

[–]kyhe06 3 points4 points ago

I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO THAT.

[–]Captain_Fuckin_Magic 1 point2 points ago

Jonathan there was lucky that Bear Grylls wasn't auditioning today.

[–]wr80 2 points3 points ago

And so the reposting of this begins...

[–]Kitty_McBitty 0 points1 point ago

I had a cousin who did this. It was kinda weird.

[–]SergeantSausage 0 points1 point ago

Dinner is served.

[–]jakersw22 0 points1 point ago

I have a new favorite gif.

[–]DiaDeLosMuertos 0 points1 point ago

Dinner?

[–]proddy 0 points1 point ago

Did he attract them with his worm?

[–]Gordzila 0 points1 point ago

WE EAT TONIGHT BOYS

[–]hefoxed 0 points1 point ago

I used to run after birds screaming "Dinner."

I was kidding of course; any birds I have easy access to would likely not be healthy due to diet and exposure to bad city air. Also, I was vegetarian.

[–]pcarne01 0 points1 point ago

worth it, until he got shit all over

[–]bladerunner89 0 points1 point ago

Now we know what you are having for dinner

[–]nddl04 0 points1 point ago

Tomorrow will be the most beautiful day of that seagull's life. His breakfast will taste better than any meal any of us have ever had.

[–]macleod2486 0 points1 point ago

My little brother caught one of those too..........by a fishing pole.

He casted overhand, released too early, line arched up and wrapped around one of those birds that happened to be flying above us. Took us long enough to untangle the damn thing and send it on its way.

[–]scroggalog 0 points1 point ago

I remember the first time I saw 'gotcha' written down. I was reading a goosebumps book in the third grade. I hadn't a clue what it meant or what word it was. I just sounded it out a few times, and on the fifth or sixth utterance it just clicked. I was like, oh shit 'gotcha' is "Got you". Still think that word looks 'ugly' though :)

[–]GiantWhaleCannon 0 points1 point ago

Huh. Like an ant lion!

[–]easylivin 0 points1 point ago

Prepare to be boarded.

[–]Wilhelm_Stark 0 points1 point ago

that is fucking awesome

[–]philosophikos 0 points1 point ago

the sandpeople are easily startled

[–]Frankenjelly 0 points1 point ago

...dinner? A friend of mine and myself agreed we'd do this someday (after I performed the chicken bouillon prank on someone). someday

[–]davecm010 0 points1 point ago

He didn't even try to resist once he was caught, just accepted that he was probably fucked.

[–]Maxfunky 0 points1 point ago

Congratulations. You now have diseases. What are you going to catch next?

[–]Wulfguy 0 points1 point ago

The guy is hot (interesting that's the part I watched it like 30 times.....)

[–]joeslo 0 points1 point ago

This what natural selection is all about

[–]Anthraxmonki 0 points1 point ago

Never walking on the beach again.

[–]warboy 0 points1 point ago

Just think the level of that seagull's fuck-o-meter is at that moment.

"WTF? I GOT CAUGHT BY THE FUCKING SAND? SHIT SHIT SHIT. GOD DAMMIT, I AM NEVER GETTING LAID AGAIN."

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

You're my hero ! I never figure out how to capture a bird, now I know !

[–]tacobellassasin 0 points1 point ago

ok ok ok let it go please!

[–]deathbytray 0 points1 point ago

Tonight, we FEAST!

[–]girrrrrrr2 0 points1 point ago

I hope this was the new planking.

[–]zitfarmer 0 points1 point ago

Honey, gather the kids. I got dinner.

[–]deltib 0 points1 point ago

That was surreal. Had the TV going in the background, and the moment the guy grabbed the gull, there's this sudden sound of squawking and flapping wings. For a few moments, I completely forgot that gifs don't have sound.

[–]downeylama 0 points1 point ago

You want a fuckin cookie?

[–]lowkeychiller 0 points1 point ago

every time i see this gif i think to myself "now what?". what on earth would you possible do with a captured seagull haha

[–]THATRANDOMWHITEGUY 0 points1 point ago

Teach a man how to fish, he'll eat for days. Teach a man how to catch seagulls at the beach...KARMA!

[–]callmechad 0 points1 point ago

lolol my friend did that and he tied a shoe string to it so he could walk it around

[–]invalid_font_size 0 points1 point ago

This will be the guy I stick with after the collapse and I'm starving.

[–]WreckerCrew 0 points1 point ago

Why would you want to touch one of those flying rats?

[–]Richie_16 0 points1 point ago

We got dinner tonight boys!

[–]TRAUMAjunkie 0 points1 point ago

Dinner!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

[–]countlazypenis 0 points1 point ago

I would have killed the s.o.a.b for stealing my chips

[–]rawilleq 0 points1 point ago

impossibru!!!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

now what?

[–]TheTinglySandwich 0 points1 point ago

Atlantic City?

[–]waterdrop66 0 points1 point ago

Quite possibly the greatest thing I have ever seen.

[–]jesse_h 0 points1 point ago

Repost.

[–]Dacien1983 0 points1 point ago

I've seen this so many times. Reddit is fucking broken.

[–]Br0ski 0 points1 point ago

As a fellow seagull catching veteran, I approve this message.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Tier4 1 point2 points ago

Dude that came out in April 2009, it's 3 years old now, can you move on?

[–]JDL04 -4 points-3 points ago

This is really mean