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Scumbag Doctors. (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by eemema

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[–]Atersed 125 points126 points ago

Their protests aren't very effective either.

[–]Sierus 5 points6 points ago

They changed the hours system to reduce on call protected sleep?!?

The bastards!

[–]Spytie 0 points1 point ago

They also killed Kenny at the same time?

THOSE BASTARDS!

[–]WhatIfItWereTrue 86 points87 points ago

  • "see it says right there: MEDICAL MARIJUANA"

  • "sir that says aspirin."

[–]haiku_robot 25 points26 points ago*

- "see it says right there:
*MEDICAL MARIJUANA*" 
- "sir that says aspirin."

[–]Radxical 6 points7 points ago

I thought aspirin was 3 syllables. TIL

[–]Mattsinger 3 points4 points ago

It is 3 syllables. It's as-pir-in, not asp-irin, or ass-pirate.

[–]OldGobbo 1 point2 points ago

or ass-prin. It just sounds like ass-prin but really people are saying ass-per/pir-in fast.

[–]TheEggNoodle 0 points1 point ago

Depends on who is saying it, I suppose

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]ricodued 0 points1 point ago

"Well listen here, you idiot pharmacist, why would I get a prescription for aspirin?"

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]thesirblondie 16 points17 points ago

"Recreational"

[–]0xbeef 0 points1 point ago

Does the recreational pot come with something the medical doesn't? It's like saying I'm drinking medical water because I'm thirsty rather than recreational water because I enjoy water. It's just fucking water.

[–]Iysif 3 points4 points ago

I believe medical marijuana has a more organized growing process. There are many different strains of marijuana as well with hugely different effects and strengths. Don't think of it as water think of it as an alcoholic beverage that sometime it's difficult to tell the "proof" of. Even still, the effects of alcohol are more predictable.

[–]Lokgar 0 points1 point ago

There are many different strains of Cannabis period.

Grown by a medical facility, it is easier to store many strains, but seriously it's not like they hold all the strains in the world hostage and the rest of the country gets no name ditch weed.

[–]Iysif 0 points1 point ago

I meant that I think "medical" marijuana has more predictable effects. I may be wrong though I've only (supposedly) smoked medical weed once.

[–]Lokgar 0 points1 point ago

Well, that's what they like to claim. I know the effects I get from it. Happiness, philosophical thinking, and slight pain relief. Body load is a hit or miss. And this is all regardless of what different strain I smoked. Other people might be more sensitive to minute changes though.

[–]Lives_in_Springfield 134 points135 points ago

The kneebone's connected to the... something. The something's connected to the... red thing. The red thing's connected to my wrist watch... Uh oh.

[–]Wammis 22 points23 points ago

Dr. Julius Hibbert: Homer, I'm afraid you'll have to undergo a coronary bypass operation. Homer Simpson: Say it in English, Doc! Dr. Hibbert: You're going to need open-heart surgery. Homer: Spare me your medical mumbo jumbo! Dr. Hibbert: We're going to cut you open and tinker with your ticker. Homer: Could you dumb it down a shade?

[–]internetsuperstar 5 points6 points ago

WELL IF IT ISN'T MY OLD FRIEND MR.MCCRAIG WITH A LEG FOR AN ARM AND AN ARM FOR A LEG!

[–]Tqwen 22 points23 points ago

Subtle novelty account, or coincidence? Either way, I applaud you, good sir.

[–]herbert_andy 0 points1 point ago

I don't get it at all.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

Simpsons quote.

[–]herbert_andy 0 points1 point ago

thanks!

[–]slammer20 22 points23 points ago

why do they have bad handwriting? why is that the stereotype?

[–]neduil 21 points22 points ago

Physician here. Let me try to shed some light into this.

First, thru all of med school we have to take notes on classes where the professors speaks non-stop. We have to write very fast because they often make questions on tests about what they said in class, and not based on some bibliography as it should be. Most people who went to med school with me started worsening their caligraphy at this point. It was not my case, as I would never take notes in class.

Then you become a intern. Patients are presented to you in a hurry, and you HAVE to take notes on EVERYTHING, because you are starting to to do your job for real, and people expect your files to be complete. So you have 15-20 minutes to take a full interview and physical and write everything down. This was the point where my handwriting got shittier.

At residency it gets really bad, because not only you have very similar demands from professors as you had in internship, but you also can't stop the hospital flow. And this is often where you start prescribing on your own. So it's a lot of writing and thinking to be done in a 10-15 minutes consultation.

It's not so bad on the everyday work. You often make your files more directed by then, and prescribing gets more natural over time, so you don't have to think so much on every drug. Still, somedays the clinic is crowded, and if there's any thing you will save time on, it's on the writing. Since you are in a hurry to see every patient and your handwriting has been beaten with a axe thru the years, often the results are very sanskrit-like.

Also, you tend to shorten your signature. I used to have a very fancy signature, but now I rarely use it. My current signature is barely a couple pen strokes. This saves a lot of time.

[–]Puga88 3 points4 points ago

As long as your name is either printed on the prescription (preferable), or you can legibly read your first and last name initials, the pharmacy is good to go!

[–]dontchokemebro 2 points3 points ago

Also a physician here, and EXACTLY this.

Electronic medical records have become my saving grace these days. My signature is just a random scribble now however. I do take my time on scripts and orders to make sure they're legible as well.

[–]abundantplums 28 points29 points ago

(Doctor's daughter here, doing my best based on my understanding.) Typically, they're writing in a hurry. Up until a few years ago, doctors would hand write notes about each patient after their appointment, then dictate those notes into a recorder at the end of the day for a nurse or dictation service to write up.

Now, a lot of doctors and hospitals are switching to computer-based notation, which is better on a lot of levels.

[–]glaedr 6 points7 points ago

That said, I was once looking at a patient's notes (they'd been written by a night shift doctor) and they were written in the most beautiful cursive :)

[–]logicalrationaltruth 18 points19 points ago

Probably a PGY1 or medical student.

[–]Actually_a_Doctor 0 points1 point ago

PGY1 should have the worst hand writing, they are doing all the bullshit cross-cover overnight. I find that Psych has the best handwriting.

[–]logicalrationaltruth 0 points1 point ago

In theory that sounds plausible, but in practice I find the higher the level of training the worse the hand writing (on a range from med student to junior attending as it seems to plateau around that point).

[–]GallifreyanRavenclaw 0 points1 point ago

Relevant username.

[–]ICanMasturbateToThat 0 points1 point ago

That being said, there is such a thing as beautiful, illegible handwriting.

[–]sistersa1vation 10 points11 points ago

This. My boyfriend just started his first clinical year and the notes he brings home from the hospital look like they were written in some sort of alien language, even though he has perfectly legible handwriting in any other situation. There's just no time to write everything out properly when you have a zillion other things to do and more patients to see.

[–]I_POTATO_PEOPLE 12 points13 points ago

It doesn't help that the things we write make no sense to people anyway. You could probably decipher his writing if you knew the medical vocabulary.

[–]essenceoferlenmeyer 5 points6 points ago

pt c/o ble pain s/p mvc, 200mg ibuprofen qid

[–]fm8 7 points8 points ago

Patient complains of bilateral lower extremity pain status post motor vehicle collision. 200 milligrams ibuprofen 4 times a day.

[–]Timedestroyerofworld 0 points1 point ago

Most impressive.

[–]fm8 0 points1 point ago

Ha, I'm a nurse. I'm deciphering this stuff all day.

[–]sistersa1vation 2 points3 points ago

That would be true, if translating medical texts wasn't part of my job :) I suppose if I actually took the time to read through them all I would be able to decipher most of his notes, but I can think of better ways for us to spend our evenings together :)

[–]VanillaIcee 2 points3 points ago

My typical Surgery SOAP note from a few years back. If you can decipher this, you're probably a doctor or nurse:

 gen - NAD, AAOx3
 h&n - NC/AT, NS w/ FROM, no LAD, no JVD
 eye - PERRLA, EOMI w/o nys, no papilledema
 ent - nL TM b/l, MMM
 cv - RRR, +S1/S2, no m/r/g
 lung - CTA b/l, no w/r/r
 abd - +BS, soft, NT/ND, no HSM
 ext - no c/c/e, 2+ pulse b/l
 ms - nL ROM, 5/5 str UE/LE
 neuro - CNII-XII intact, nL sens b/l, DTR 2+ b/l, nl FTN/HTS, nL gait, -romberg

[–]toothbucket 0 points1 point ago

if you had the time to check all of this for a soap, you're doing it wrong.

[–]VanillaIcee 1 point2 points ago

True, this was the initial exam for some patients, often trauma. Plus I cut and pasted it since we had a computerized system. My followup exams were usually: NAD

[–]casmafen 0 points1 point ago

or a pharmacist...

[–]sixsidepentagon 0 points1 point ago

Ooc, is AOx3 the norm? As an EMT I was always taught that AOx4 (person place, time and event) was the norm. Does it change once in the hospital?

[–]MyUsrNameWasTaken 0 points1 point ago

Isn't an event just a place at a certain time with a person? x4 seems a little redundant. As an EMT I always learned it as x3 is normal. It's most likely a geographical norm.

[–]sixsidepentagon 0 points1 point ago

Event is more like what you were doing. Ie, that I was playing softball when I got hit in the head, not that I'm on the field at noon with my friends.

[–]dontchokemebro 0 points1 point ago

So a normal exam...

Except surgeons after their residency become allergic to writing and just put a 2 line exam in their "notes".

[–]lovelemurs 7 points8 points ago

Does it disturb anyone else that I_POTATO_PEOPLE is a doctor?

[–]analgesiac 7 points8 points ago

Tuber State University is highly respected in the field of tuberology.

[–]mokthraka 2 points3 points ago

You also don't always have a hard surface to write on. Clip board aren't easy to write on.

[–]lolmonger 1 point2 points ago

Up until a few years ago, doctors would hand write notes about each patient after their appointment, then dictate those notes into a recorder at the end of the day for a nurse or dictation service to write up.

Still happens in a lot of hospitals, even those transferring to electronic systems like Epic.

Also, some doctors hate the type system (it's not a matter of typing, it's a matter of clicking through prompts), and just do dictations anyways.

[–]SamuraiPanda 0 points1 point ago

This pretty much. We're all so used to taking an absurd amount of notes at light speed through college then medical school, so its nearly impossible to have legible handwriting unless you spend a long time writing per patient.

[–]navetari 7 points8 points ago

As a medical resident I blame the amount of paperwork we have to do. Since medical school, I have slowly watched my handwriting transform into hieroglyphs. Around the hundreth prescription intern year you just start writing a cirlce that in some way resembles your initials. It is a necessary evil.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Puga88 1 point2 points ago

The new electronic system comes with it's own set of errors. I've seen more errors in the sig codes on E-scripts then I have ever seen on any handwritten script (no matter how poorly written).

For those who don't know what an E-Script is, it is basically an electronic prescription that can be "emailed" (loosely using this term) directly into a pharmacies computer system. (I don't believe all states have this program set up yet)

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Puga88 0 points1 point ago

I work in retail, and I am not familiar with the physician's side of the program, only the pharmacy side of it. I do not actually know what checks and balances the program has for drug-sig safety, etc. :-\ All I know is I see quite a few errors, and sigs that just don't make sense.

Added : I do assume that there is some format of checks to catch most of these types of errors, however, it seems that there are still ways to get around this somehow.

[–]masterwolfe 1 point2 points ago

I concur with this entirely. I still prefer E-Scripts over handwritten, but the amount of ridiculous errors I see is laughable. The other day for a Flonase RX it said something along the lines of "Take 2 tablets by mouth twice a day."

[–]Ciznit 0 points1 point ago

Just out of curiosity, what system do you use for E-scripts? I'm surprised that what you're using doesn't have checks in place for errors like that.

[–]Puga88 0 points1 point ago

I'm feeling very foolish right now, because I am completely blanking on the program name. If you are truly curious, let me know, and I'll look it up when I am at work tomorrow.

I believe (and assume) it does have some checks and balances in it, however, I don't know much about the "physician-side" of the program, only the retail pharmacy side, so I am unfamiliar with what they see and receive when looking at the program. I do notice more errors coming from some offices then others, so perhaps some/many of these have been addressed, but just not yet updated on their side?

[–]MyOtherAcctIsACar 1 point2 points ago

to be honest 50% of it is just to keep pharmacists on their toes

[–]cmF 0 points1 point ago

Pharmacology isn't that hard. Imagine if all drugs were written in IUPAC format.

Vicodin would be 4,5a-Epoxy-3-methoxy-17-methylmorphinan-6-one

[–]Osteowhat 2 points3 points ago

(Soon to be Doctor here) Try having a patient tell you 100 problems and you write them down as legibly as possible. You have to sum up this entire hx in 10 minutes, including the physical, so we short hand essentially and then rewrite it later.

On top of this, only 4 people actually read out notes anyway, the nurse, your medical biller insurance companies and ourselves. Thankful computers are here to save the day, when they audit our notes, if they can't read it, you could lose out on money.

The making fun of our writing really comes from the scripts we use to hand write, you wanted to make it legible enough for the pharmacist, but hard enough for the patient to change, especially in cases of giving out control substances.

Dr's Signatures are also just awful. Think of the Seinfeld episode where Jerry has to sign over all of those checks from the Japanese commercials he did. His hand cramped up, well when we are writing 40-90 scripts in a day, you want a signature that is quick. Problem is, now people can't read who signed it, so you have to print your name under it.

[–]omegabeene 0 points1 point ago

A lot of people will tell you that it is short hand and that doctors have to write a bunch on each patient in a limited time and that is sure part of the reason why they are sloppy, but in my opinion the real reason is that a patient only sees the script they are handed. Scripts used to be written in Latin, so when a person would take a script to the pharmacy to get it filled out you would look at it before hand, not knowing that is was written in Latin you would just think that the doctor is a sloppy. The stereotype has just continued over time and it will probably be there after we are all dead and doctors just type notes on computers.

[–]lockleon 0 points1 point ago

Because they constantly need to prescribe drugs with huge names and are impossible to spell. So if the nurse can't read it, then they have to ask and the doctor can pronounce it fine.

[–]XaosZaleski 38 points39 points ago

I work at a nursing home, and sometimes I have to call the Dr office because they have sent their orders via fax, and it's literally just a line and their signature.

[–]BigMcLargeHuge 64 points65 points ago*

After working with pharmacists for almost a decade, I can honestly say that those people could decipher damn near anything. Doctor had a seizure while writing an order out in ancient Sumerian glyphs? I bet the pharmacist can read it..

[–]laddergoat89 6 points7 points ago

There's an episode of curb your enthusiasm about that.

[–]Honestly_ 2 points3 points ago

They're the people that deciphered the Rosetta Stone.

[–]andgravy 7 points8 points ago

They actually have to take a class to make their handwriting bad to deter forgery.

[–]UncivilDKizzle 20 points21 points ago

I don't think this is true. At the very least I've never heard of such a class and it is not part of my curriculum. Many med schools are actually considering adding penmanship classes to combat this, as it's a problem that causes deaths, not something that was intentionally instituted by the profession.

[–]Osteowhat 2 points3 points ago

Good thing every hospital is suppose to be computer based by 2014

[–]r3m0t 3 points4 points ago

whoosh

[–]UncivilDKizzle 9 points10 points ago*

I honestly suspected that this was sarcasm, but considering that a lot of people replied who seemed to believe it was the truth, I wanted to reply to it anyway. Not to mention that there were other people in this thread repeating the same sort of concept.

[–]VanillaIcee -2 points-1 points ago

double whoosh

[–]logicalrationaltruth 2 points3 points ago

It's actually because they have to write very fast.

[–]Sushirobots 6 points7 points ago

Wouldn't that make forgery easier?

[–]Definitelynotrexryan -3 points-2 points ago

It's intentionally bad and unique, to the point it would be really difficult to forge

[–]parryriposte 3 points4 points ago

This is not true.

[–]I_POTATO_PEOPLE 3 points4 points ago

This is not true.

[–]abundantplums 5 points6 points ago

That would explain it. My sister has gorgeous handwriting, except when she's doing doctor things.

[–]0xbeef 0 points1 point ago

I'm no doctor but I have a post-it pad that I use as a notebook, it is definitely is on-par with prescription pads.

[–]Lugonn -1 points0 points ago

I would make a fantastic doctor.

[–]drevenant -1 points0 points ago

They don't take classes to learn bad handwriting, but bad handwriting is a good way to prevent average people from picking up someone's lost prescription and being able to read the medical information on it. People's medical information is very private business. You know, HIPAA and whatever.

[–]Puga88 -1 points0 points ago

That just makes us pharmacists have to take several classes on how to read said handwriting....

[–]pharmhand 0 points1 point ago

I've become so accustomed to god awful doctor writing that when a prescription is too neat, I start getting suspicious...

[–]masterwolfe 1 point2 points ago

"Oxycodone 30mg Take 2 q4h as needed. QTY: 360" Perfectly written SIG and Doctor's signature. Yeah, let me get right on filling that.

[–]emt3225 2 points3 points ago

I also work in a Nursing Home and I'm like WTF. I can't even read the doctors report. It takes a few of the dept heads to figure out his report then orders. Frustrating as all hell

[–]mwuk42 0 points1 point ago

Even then, their signatures can have a million different variants. Each as indistinct as the last.

[–]Moregunsthanpatience 1 point2 points ago

One of our attending's signatures is literally just a line. When he started at this hospital, pharmacies called every day to ask if someone might have stolen a prescription pad.

[–]Ron-Swanson 9 points10 points ago

Doctors' sloppy handwriting kills more than 7,000 people annually. It's a shocking statistic, and, according to a July 2006 report from the National Academies of Science's Institute of Medicine (IOM), preventable medication mistakes also injure more than 1.5 million Americans annually.

link

[–]sixsidepentagon 1 point2 points ago

And that's why electronic medical records are to become the norm soon

[–]DangerMouseToby 4 points5 points ago

I work in a pharmacy this is just on almost every single script

[–]mlearn2 4 points5 points ago

You get used to it after a while though. I've been a tech for almost a year now, and while I occasionally have trouble deciphering what the doctor has written, for the most part I can figure it out.

I've found I also get used to the way certain doctors write. Once you've seen the same doctor write for the same medication, with the same or similar directions, you can get the hang of what their chicken scratch says.

But, it would be nice if they wrote cleaner.

[–]DangerMouseToby 2 points3 points ago

The worst is when they forget to sign it so you cant dispense the medicine and the patient acts like its your fault.

[–]Puga88 1 point2 points ago*

I hate this; It happens more often then one would think. Also, when they forget to date the prescription, or date it wrong (such as a future date, not a "fill by" date).

I had a C-II come through that was dated wrong, and we couldn't fill it. The office was already closed, so I couldn't call that day to fix it, but offered to call her Dr the next day and fill it. Patient went on a rant about how it was entirely our fault, and she wanted the script back to take to walgreens to fill Today. After politely telling her they wouldn't fill it either, I handed it to her. She was back about an hour later fuming about how we had apparently called walgreens and the several other pharmacies she had tried to take it and told all of them not to fill it, just because we didn't like her. I really wanted to tell her, "Really? I've got better things to do then sit here, calling other pharmacies, just to make you have a bad day."

[–]chad_bro_chill_17 7 points8 points ago

I once took a prescription to the pharmacy that THEY couldn't even read. And pharmacists are like the Jackie Chans of reading bad handwriting.

[–]Shadyfrenzy 4 points5 points ago

Classic humour. You know it's funny when it's done in MS Paint.

[–]Bubzy_Bubs 2 points3 points ago

The third guy looks an awful lot like Dr. Foreman

[–]OhSeven 0 points1 point ago

It's him!!

[–]ReconZeppelin 2 points3 points ago

My wound care instructions from a while back: http://i.imgur.com/8ARTF.png

[–]Pauer 4 points5 points ago

1 week. keep clear of x3 dip the wlgath = zoap + Hl2O. by Ail.

[–]toothbucket 2 points3 points ago

keep clean and dry x 3 days. then wash gently in soap and water

[–]Pterodactyl_sir 1 point2 points ago

And then I said "you have a brain tumor!" -laughter throughout the hospital-

[–]ueaben 1 point2 points ago

From my experience, surgeons have the worst handwriting. I always find this kind of ironic considering how meticulously precise they are with their operations.

[–]sports__fan 1 point2 points ago

Bad handwriting aside, they use too many medical abbreviations for the average person to have any hope of understanding what was written.

[–]TarAldarion 1 point2 points ago

I have no idea how the pharmacist knows what I am getting. It's basically just a line ಠ_ಠ

[–]JohnixHD 1 point2 points ago

This is so funny, the same joke from two days ago but with a different picture.

Seriously though, redditors don't seem to have a good memory. I feel like im being trolled some how, i don't even get on reddit every day either.

[–]dryver 1 point2 points ago

this is a repost.

[–]iLuVtiffany 0 points1 point ago

Sometimes when I try to read what pill to take I just match how many letters there are, look for a number for how many times a day. That's how a read a doctors orders.

[–]Benutzerkonto 0 points1 point ago

That stock photo alone is worth a post.

[–]kawaiigardiner 0 points1 point ago

I guess I'm lucky with the doctor's I've been do use a computer and print out a prescription then sign it.

[–]userkm 0 points1 point ago

One does not simply read a doctor's handwriting.

[–]Lenboticus 0 points1 point ago

actually I can do it simply

[–]guy_following_you 0 points1 point ago

You guys have no idea how much we have to write/type. It's stupid amount

[–]glitchbitch 0 points1 point ago

we should of had electronic notation fucking ages ago. it's so annoying going though tonnes of paper! ಠ_ಠ

[–]THE_WORD_IS_HAVE 0 points1 point ago

we should have had electronic notation fucking ages ago.

[–]eckliptic 0 points1 point ago

In a few years this joke will be completely outdated. My clinic and hospital all use electronic orders, documentation and prescriptions now. Even the paper prescriptions are printed first and I sign them after that.

[–]A-H 0 points1 point ago

It's pretty sad, my hand writing after medical school has gotten so bad that I can't even read it when I look back.

[–]seniorpantaloons 0 points1 point ago

It clearly says ... biiiitch

[–]clp321 0 points1 point ago

Hahaha... no.1 reason I went to medical school is so I could make people intuit what I was thinking

[–]lovelemurs 0 points1 point ago

Doctor once gave me some prescription for pills and was like "oh! And there was something importan I had to tell you about those.... I can't recall what it was...."

"Oh well"

Made me feel very safe.

[–]w04andia 0 points1 point ago

As a Medical Student I can confirm the abysmal handwriting of doctors -_-

[–]Allwrongforyou 0 points1 point ago

Hahah! That one gets me every time. Good stuff.

[–]Voslingr 0 points1 point ago

HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAA!

[–]GoLoosh 0 points1 point ago

Reminds me of that Curb Your Enthusiasm episode.

[–]Dapper_Draper[!] 0 points1 point ago

I have handwriting like this, therefor, I am destine to be a doctor.

[–]grungevalue 0 points1 point ago

This stock image is so bad. "Everyone awkwardly lean back with your mouths open while staring at another person."

[–]AppYeR 0 points1 point ago

Hah I just finished a month long nursing placement and I can confirm the unreadability of doctor writing.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]MalcolmY 0 points1 point ago

I'm an Optometrist. I see patients files, filled with Optometrists and Ophthalmologists handwriting.

I can confirm this. I can confirm that female handwriting is beautiful. I will not comment on mine, nor on mens handwriting. Disgusting.

[–]TheHangOfThursday 0 points1 point ago

SERIOUSLY, HOW MANY OF YOU ARE MEDICAL UNDERLINGS?

[–]Bencool 0 points1 point ago

Medical Professionals: Fluent writers of Arabic.

[–]Rallerboy888 -4 points-3 points ago

Repost

[–]ExEdrills -1 points0 points ago

Postfrom 9gag..lawdy

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]poo_in_mah_ass 3 points4 points ago

really?! that must be the premise of the joke!

[–]Relton_Asq -1 points0 points ago

Oh wow. They made one of the doctors Black in their stock photograph, how progressive.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

Three women and a black guy. That doesn't seem very representative of any group of doctors I've ever seen.

Oh right, it's lying with an agenda.

[–]DiscordApple131 -5 points-4 points ago

It's true. I've always had my teachers ask about my dad's signature without even having to forge it.

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