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all 156 comments

[–]syzygt 184 points185 points ago

Lettuce on the lifeboats!!

[–]ani625 92 points93 points ago

Leaf the lifeboats alone, lady.

[–]raisin_bran_in 100 points101 points ago

Do you carrot all about the women and children?

[–]nalc 63 points64 points ago

They're still dressing into their lifejackets

[–]bordercollieflower 57 points58 points ago*

Not too many people! Don't want to squash them!

[–]DarthContinent 94 points95 points ago

Don't panic, romaine in your seats!!

[–]ooo0ooo 67 points68 points ago

But this ship is full of leeks!

[–]jakfischer 38 points39 points ago

I will relish in the fact that you are all dead men.

[–]cmd_iii 36 points37 points ago

My artichoke heart will go on....

[–]GayLeDouche 25 points26 points ago

Don't be radicchio! This ship is unsinkable!

[–]angrymole 27 points28 points ago

Hurry, the ship is spinaching out of contol.

[–]oriental_lasanya 27 points28 points ago

Hold on tight so you don't get tossed overboard!

[–]Istudywumbology 9 points10 points ago

Where have the rescue crews bean all this time :(

[–]oriental_lasanya 19 points20 points ago

The Caesar too rough.

[–]Istudywumbology 0 points1 point ago

Thats a good one!

[–]GeneralWarts 21 points22 points ago

You've put us in quite the pickle.

[–]yellowcushion 3 points4 points ago

If the lifeboats are full, grab a life preserver endive right in.

[–]Mercades 14 points15 points ago

Rose was quite seductive without her dressing.

[–]niXor 5 points6 points ago

Lettuce not into temptation but deliver us from beaver!

[–]AntonJokinen 2 points3 points ago

But if we don't get out now we'll be shredded!

[–]jakfischer 2 points3 points ago

Finally. Another thread where we can Jack around and discuss if Rose was capable of moving her fat ass over so they can both fit. Also, dressing.

[–]justtoclick 7 points8 points ago

She did try, and the door almost sank...should have tossed the diamond then. Must have weighed a ton...but lettuce move on...

[–]Negative-KarmaRecord -4 points-3 points ago

You suck at puns.

[–]StewieBanana 8 points9 points ago

No, you must romaine where you are.

[–]ErrorlessGnome 8 points9 points ago

just gonna wedge my self in here

[–]I_STOP_ALL_PUNS 7 points8 points ago

STOP

[–]Kslo33 9 points10 points ago

Lettuce continue!

[–]atheist_maybe 1 point2 points ago

Sorry about that. It seems this ship has sailed. Lettuce go on!

[–]I_will_not_forget 0 points1 point ago

Hammer time.

[–]FineFuse 1 point2 points ago

Gentlemen, Its been an honor pearforming with you tonight.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

Pears are fruit.

[–]FineFuse 8 points9 points ago

...shit

[–]ThatFedExMan -2 points-1 points ago

This is fucking hilarious....

[–]CUM_BLASTED_CORPSE 4 points5 points ago

Why the ellipsis?

[–]SuchAnItch -4 points-3 points ago

bazinga!

[–]JayTS 20 points21 points ago

Why do I find puns in picture format so funny, yet lame when written? I lost it when I saw Chewbacha on /r/classicalmusic earlier this week.

[–]TheoQ99 1 point2 points ago

I saw that post before, but did not realize the pun.

[–]konekoanni 1 point2 points ago

That is amazing.

[–]captainmorgan23 66 points67 points ago

I opened this, saw the boat. smiled. closed it. ...wait...reopened. then the realization ICEBERG lettuce. just fucking lost it at work in the middle of my office.

[–]NeverfailMode 34 points35 points ago

Damn you're easy. I like almost quarter-smiled at the pun.

[–]zero1110010 21 points22 points ago

lol I couldn't figure out why the boat was headed for a watermelon....

[–]YannisNeos 5 points6 points ago

Where did they find a Brussel sprout so big???

[–]PUSSY_FEAST_420 2 points3 points ago

You must have seen some things man...

[–]gpacaci 1 point2 points ago

That's what all these 999" monitors are doing to us.

[–]TheoQ99 1 point2 points ago

Well I hope your office mates found it.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

I thought it was a watermelon until I read this comment.

[–]MattyHchrist 12 points13 points ago

For some reason I saw the boat as a weird crab alien

[–]verdatum 6 points7 points ago

Need a weird crab alien? Why not...

[–]KnightBlue 5 points6 points ago

sigh Zoidburg...

[–]bluefoot55 1 point2 points ago

As opposed to, say, a familiar crab alien.

[–]deadlygolfcart 18 points19 points ago*

I can't tell if I'm pissed that you stole my picture that I took in my kitchen, or just happy that so many people liked something i made. Meh. Fuck it. You're welcome for the karma.

[–]WTFAlex 4 points5 points ago

For the curious here is his post from 2 days ago.

[–]dhaft88 5 points6 points ago

DNEL (did not expect lettuce)

[–]bobaimee 3 points4 points ago

I GET IT!

[–]nite_wolf 12 points13 points ago

icy what you did there.

[–]EyePatchedEm 8 points9 points ago

Too soon.

[–]TrolleyPower 1 point2 points ago

Gosh, don't you know Titanic was so last week!

[–]ZM2N4AiP_A4 2 points3 points ago

Apparently, guys, this is based off a true event. James Cameron did the documentary.

[–]down_vote_magnet 1 point2 points ago

Needs some little pomegranate lifeboats. But not enough to save all the cucumber seeds.

[–]bebesee 1 point2 points ago

Draw me like one of your French Vinaigrettes.

[–]JoeAconite 1 point2 points ago

The saladtrack features Celery Dijon's single "My Heart of Romaine Wilt Onion".

[–]finalaccountdown 2 points3 points ago

that is SO FUCKING STUPID.

UPVOTE.

[–]zedsdeadbby 1 point2 points ago

Veggietales Titanic.

[–]Matlock_ 4 points5 points ago

too soon.

[–]Hyperian 2 points3 points ago

TOO SOON

[–]Fauscailt 1 point2 points ago

I know, the movie just came out like a month ago!

[–]BajczTheDamned 1 point2 points ago

All the upvotes for food jokes :D

[–]osella 1 point2 points ago

Isn't that a cabbage?

[–]tehmlem 2 points3 points ago

Looks like they're in quite the pickle.

[–]TheSaddestGrape 5 points6 points ago

Cue cumbersome rescue operations.

[–]tehmlem 0 points1 point ago

Chloro-fill the lifeboats!

[–]Reclaimer-117 0 points1 point ago

Look a(head)! An iceberg!

[–]The_Dirty_Burg 0 points1 point ago

So this is how it ends. In a sea of Ranch dressing, my least favorite.

[–]xtemplarx 0 points1 point ago

TOO SOON!

[–]warriorajah 0 points1 point ago

Good for a laugh! XD

[–]therenreddit 0 points1 point ago

I got all excited thinking this was more about the albino whale... alas, I am disappointed it was just vegetables.

[–]afihavok 0 points1 point ago

Well that's just ridiculous.

[–]ironiciconic 0 points1 point ago

I laughed, then I felt bad

[–]graziano8852 0 points1 point ago

This is what we call a Charles

[–]Fishooked 0 points1 point ago

Is it hard over?

[–]brigodon 0 points1 point ago

100 years later...still too soon, man...

[–]Iceberg33 0 points1 point ago

This offends me.

[–]HardAssLurker 0 points1 point ago

ohh i get it the lettuce is iceberg lettuce

[–]iphoneluver 0 points1 point ago

I see what you did there making I see what you did there face

[–]wangsworld 0 points1 point ago

[–]darthbone 0 points1 point ago

I used to work in produce.

I get this joke on all appropriate levels.

[–]bax101 0 points1 point ago

put it on Ebay I bet it would sell.

[–]bayoumama 0 points1 point ago

Clever,didnt even cross my mind about the lettuce.

[–]HouseOfHouse 0 points1 point ago

"Captain, there seems be a huge Lettuce off the starboard" "Don't worry well steer round it and chop it up in time for lunch".

[–]SwagLikeKyu 0 points1 point ago

Repost...

[–]LiveLikeYouDream 0 points1 point ago

Whenever I see ICEBERG in all caps it reminds me of ICEBERG vodka

[–]EltaninAntenna 0 points1 point ago

I read that in the same voice as ICE CREAM! ICE CREAM! Amiga owners will know what I'm talking about...

[–]hazleapricot 0 points1 point ago

My cabbages!

[–]Dankycheese 0 points1 point ago

What's with all the titanic posts on reddit lately?

[–]mogyi 0 points1 point ago

is it a zukkini or a cucumber?

[–]BourbonAndBlues 0 points1 point ago

Too soon dude, too soon.

[–]fairwayks 0 points1 point ago

That's what we get for letting the Swiss chard our route. Now there is too much watercressting into the ship. I think I will endive into the cold sea and hope to find a floating door.

[–]speedhole 0 points1 point ago

My first and still my favorite Woot! shirt.

[–]RDIIIG 0 points1 point ago

Must be making a salad of titanic proportions.

[–]goots 0 points1 point ago

badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger

[–]coppershoe825 0 points1 point ago

To soon

[–]Im_thatguy 0 points1 point ago

You're a banana aren't you?

[–]warpfield 0 points1 point ago

I demand you lettuce into the lifeboats!!

[–]BC_Trees 0 points1 point ago

Bravo.

[–]xSl1pery_Walrus 0 points1 point ago

Hahaha! Classic

[–]Jessedef 0 points1 point ago

too soon.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

TOO SOON!! TOO SOOOOOON!

[–]dukefan779 0 points1 point ago

I think about that way to much at the grocery store.

[–]ElRed_ 0 points1 point ago

Imagine if he went too early and got run over.

[–]hdesignsit 0 points1 point ago

this is bloody fantastic

[–]Rx_Rated 0 points1 point ago

Too soon....

[–]SkyBS 0 points1 point ago

I tried to think of some cucumber/boat wordplay but it didn't work.

[–]smellthyscrote 0 points1 point ago

FALSE.

Lettuce.

[–]seanbennick 0 points1 point ago

Sound the alarm... Arugula! Arugula!

[–]slickrick83 0 points1 point ago

Expected some Zoidberg joke... Why not Zoidberg?!

[–]CraftyCactus 0 points1 point ago

dood not fnny peple dyed taek it dwn mayne.

That, 9/11-joke haters, is called consistency.

[–]tugmyboat 0 points1 point ago

This is a reference to the Titanic and the iceberg it hit that eventually caused it to sink. Iceberg is a type of lettuce. Ha! Good day sir.

[–]DocShadeball420 -2 points-1 points ago

It's dead a head! I hope it doesn't wedge into the hull!

[–]rembinalle -2 points-1 points ago

Can't...make...words...

[–]niXor 0 points1 point ago

98% Jesus!

[–]Alpharalpher -1 points0 points ago

Caeser! She's tilting toward starboard!

[–]Dildo_Ball_Baggins -1 points0 points ago

Before they crash again, can someone please tell Kate to give Leonardo some god damn room on that wardrobe.

[–]Bluedonk -1 points0 points ago

How creative. I shit better art than that.

[–]darwyn4 -1 points0 points ago

retard

[–]FUDGESICLES -4 points-3 points ago

[–]xomegaJesusx -2 points-1 points ago

My friends don't know enough about lettuce to get this :(

[–]greylendark -3 points-2 points ago

That cucumber isn't as titanic as it should be.

[–]coolj50 -3 points-2 points ago

I wish I had more upvotes to give you

[–]fish619407 -3 points-2 points ago

TOSS MY SALAD!

[–]wojx 2 points3 points ago

NO!

[–]fish619407 -3 points-2 points ago

YES!