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all 47 comments

[–]OMGPUNTHREADS 13 points14 points ago

I wish being single was this awesome in real life. Alas, for every one man who lives happily this way, there are 1,000,000 who try and fail.

[–]Meatstaff[S] 3 points4 points ago

We all better hope to be that man.

[–]Goddamlitre-o-cola 6 points7 points ago

Or just realise that all girls are not asshole. Much in the same way as all guys are not assholes. Asshole

[–]nooknstuff 0 points1 point ago

I like the hope in this post.

[–]TheThistle 0 points1 point ago

Yes, we are not all asshole.

[–]Patass -1 points0 points ago

wat

[–]osheasf 10 points11 points ago

and was forever alone

[–]Anonymous01000100 6 points7 points ago

...and still a better love story than Twilight!

[–]AduroNox 7 points8 points ago

Then, one day, while doing something innocuous--maybe fixing dinner or taking a shower--he will realize the crushing void in his life. He'll look in the mirror and see his rapidly deteriorating body; soon his strength and looks will be gone. Then what? Who will be there to talk to when he's too tired to go out, when his friends have settled down and started families, when those cute skinny chicks forsake him? Or not. You know, whatever. You do what makes you happy and hope for the best.

[–]Fosnez 6 points7 points ago

Then he snapped out of it and realized that he doesn't need to be in a relationship to feel complete.

[–]Skishkitteh 6 points7 points ago

(continued) ,but that there was no reason to be a dick about it. The braggy "better than you" teenage voice in his head had finally faded and while he continued to be awesome he no longer felt the need to validate himself by making "see I don't need no cheating women to be happy" posts. He poured himself some manly jack, read a complex book and thought about his awesome future.

[–]glass_canon 1 point2 points ago

Then what?

Then books, pipes, fishing, dogs, hammocks, more pot, scotch, carpentry, telescopes, cigars, cabins, boats, hunting, and general badassery unhindered by whining.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]glass_canon 1 point2 points ago

I was thinking more along the lines of children, but it doesn't really matter where it won't be coming from. But it has been a while since I received a good sexist downvote so carry on.

[–]adentist002 3 points4 points ago

Man, no woman no cry. That is the universal truth

[–]groovy_gary 7 points8 points ago

you seem to have misunderstood the line "No woman, no cry." somewhat...

[–]CanolaIsAlsoRapeseed 2 points3 points ago

Most likely, but that doesn't mean it's not true.

[–]kinboyatuwo 0 points1 point ago

It's all about punctuation.

[–]Flauni 0 points1 point ago

I always thought that was what that line meant.

[–]ElectricSeal 1 point2 points ago

Can i get this on a big poster? Does someone sell these?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and.

My head hurts. I think you killed my inner grammar-nazi. Ouch.

[–]Lots42 0 points1 point ago

It deserved to die.

[–]Ostolation 2 points3 points ago

Just described my life. When I'm dreaming.

[–]little_gnora 3 points4 points ago

To. Damn. Many. Fonts.

Other than that, excellent.

[–]shrimpyogurt 3 points4 points ago

boy do i love these fuckin things! once upon a time two people who clearly didnt love each other decided not to get married and filled their time with completely materialistic things that in no way made either of them grow as a person the eeeeeeenddd!

[–]Rhym 7 points8 points ago

Family isn't for all of us.

[–]shrimpyogurt 0 points1 point ago

It doesn't have to be but I certainly want more from life than the continuous single party. I don't want a family myself but i would rather fill my time with all of those things and some things that made a difference or helped people.

[–]AppliedFapping 0 points1 point ago

Once a prince asked a princess to marry him and the princess said NO.

So instead the prince became a vegetarian and drank free-trade coffee and spent every waking hour helping other in various ways. He went to Africa to spread food, he helped out in soup kitchens, and he volunteered with the Red Cross at foreign disaster locations. Unfortunately his overwhelming guilt complex drove him to donate more and more of his life until there was nothing left, and he died miserable and early.

[–]Lots42 2 points3 points ago

Doesn't matter, fucked many beautiful ladies.

[–]shrimpyogurt 0 points1 point ago

hahahaha touche, touche

[–]thediplomat 1 point2 points ago

Since when does milk come in a box?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

You must be canadian?

From a fellow igloo builder from sweden, boxed milk is pretty common.

[–]Sccatter 1 point2 points ago

Barney Stinson?

[–]Lots42 0 points1 point ago

He rocks.

[–]Jubeii 0 points1 point ago

Moral of the story: it is good to be a prince.

[–]zaynmalik1D 0 points1 point ago

all these different fonts hurt my head

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

this has never been posted before

[–]GummyDeath 0 points1 point ago

Some sad, sad, bitter man wrote this.

[–]tbmafia36 0 points1 point ago

It's too bad Disney teaches little girls to say yes to that question.

[–]mingling4502 0 points1 point ago

I've seen this about a hundred times...but I still take the time to read it when it shows up.

[–]KarmaWhore2468 0 points1 point ago

Repost

[–]Goddamlitre-o-cola 0 points1 point ago

Fucking karma whore. We DO NOT appreciate

[–]KarmaWhore2468 0 points1 point ago

I'm not karma whoring as my name may suggest, I'm just stating that this is a repost therefore I am not a karma whore the OP is.

[–]Goddamlitre-o-cola 0 points1 point ago

It was just a joke

[–]weaponize -1 points0 points ago

Love this, lol.

[–]Surch -1 points0 points ago

That shit is funny.

Ok. Everyone go through the comments and guess who is male or female. Should be pretty easy.

[–]MTRBeast33 0 points1 point ago

I was enjoying doing the same thing TBH