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top 200 commentsshow all 207

[–]t3chpoint0 173 points174 points ago

He should add a pretzel stick cigar to the shot to make it even more hardcore.

[–]KingCoopa730 27 points28 points ago

I think he should have been smoking some smarties. That's BA.

[–]supersillyus 24 points25 points ago

smoking smarties is completely unreasonable. snorting them, on the other hand..

[–]HellaBitchin 33 points34 points ago

in Canada, smarties are these and these are rockets

[–]sweet_nightmares 25 points26 points ago

As an American who ordered a McFlurry in Canada, that confused the fuck out of me.

[–]KingCoopa730 2 points3 points ago

Wait so it was a smarties McFlurry?

[–]sweet_nightmares -3 points-2 points ago

Yeah, cause that's what they call M&M's in Canada

[–]NameTak3r 13 points14 points ago

No, smarties are the megabloks/roseart of chocolate coated in a colorful sugar shell.

[–]Spookaboo 5 points6 points ago

Wrong way round. as much as i love m&ms smarties are superior.

[–]banana-nana 4 points5 points ago

What the fuck is going on

[–]jb_ 6 points7 points ago

In New Zealand, we have Smarties AND M&Ms!

[–]olply 2 points3 points ago

Same as in Canada, sweet_nightmares is just wrong...

[–]MattyGroch 1 point2 points ago

I did this same thing.
"I can get SMARTIES in a McFlurry?! I HAVE TO TRY THIS." ... "Aw, dammit."

[–]Leofan7 7 points8 points ago

Cool. I actually like the name Rockets better.

[–]Im_A_Lemon 2 points3 points ago

I was sort of confused by this as well seen as we call smarties the same thing as you in England...Was all like "how could you smoke smarties? O.o"

[–]infidel118i 2 points3 points ago

English here too.

I'm more that up for trying to smoke smarties. Perhaps we'd light the smarties tube like a huge blunt?

[–]olply 1 point2 points ago

maybe we gotta grind up just the hard shells? That'd take a while, actually.

[–]Vcent 2 points3 points ago

Same everywhere else .. Just America doing weird stuff.. As always :/

[–]hipsterkatten 1 point2 points ago

Wait, aren't they always called Smarties?

[–]abenfVA 0 points1 point ago

everything i once held dear... jettisoned into the void of outer space... just like that...

[–]SheldonFreeman 0 points1 point ago

Wha-....why?

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Except the brand is 'Smarties'.

[–]Licks_eyeballs 0 points1 point ago

im thinking they are like sprees

[–]EnderWiggin3rd 0 points1 point ago

smoking chetos is bad ass

[–]FleshlightTester 0 points1 point ago

Stop it

[–]Avohaj 10 points11 points ago

Nice try, Smarties rep

no seriously nice try, after work I'm going to buy fucking smarties. fuck you product placement.

[–]KingCoopa730 5 points6 points ago

That actually sounds like a good idea. Imagine that I product placemented myself...

[–]loverofreeses 7 points8 points ago

[–]ROFLBRYCE 9 points10 points ago

[–]KingCoopa730 2 points3 points ago

You can't smoke a Reeses peanut butter cup, silly.

[–]easyjesus 1 point2 points ago

Maybe not, but you can watch me try.

[–]KingCoopa730 0 points1 point ago

Now that is something I want to see.

[–]twocheapliesaday 1 point2 points ago

rather, smoking a candy cigarette.

[–]BigClifty 1 point2 points ago

I want to see him doing lines of pixie stick dust.

[–]metacarpel 1 point2 points ago

been there done that. Sure gives you a rush

[–]ironw00d 0 points1 point ago

*snorting

[–]T-Luv 1 point2 points ago

No, smoking

[–]Goto10 3 points4 points ago

Grape Koolaid in his other hand

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

Flashing some monopoly money and a pair of foam nunchucks.

[–]BanditoRojo 297 points298 points ago

Yea boi! Police can't mess with my office plant.

[–]pipian 270 points271 points ago

I aint no bish I smoke dat hibiscus, nigga.

[–]jayrady 42 points43 points ago

The Home Depot is his dealer.

[–]kingxhall 38 points39 points ago

Highbiscus*

[–]ani625 94 points95 points ago

[–]ironw00d 21 points22 points ago

Did somebody say biscuits? I've got the munchies...

[–]foobiscuit 4 points5 points ago

biscuits checking in!

[–]Here_for_the_cookies 3 points4 points ago

Biscuits will have to do for now...

[–]laterolus 2 points3 points ago

I am going to consume you now.

[–]Soggybiscuit 1 point2 points ago

Well hello there.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Aerocity 14 points15 points ago

Your other post was funnier.

[–]Col_Psoas -1 points0 points ago

yet this one was first. reddit is a strange beast

[–]onlyforaminute 7 points8 points ago

Joshua, have you seen my ficus?

[–]IronLionZion88 4 points5 points ago

get away from that ficus finch, that's a jizz free ficus.

[–]sparton192 16 points17 points ago

his mom is going to get mad that he spilled dirt all over the house.

[–]adelie42 4 points5 points ago

Just don't mess with my purple!

[–]OhHaiMarc 3 points4 points ago

oh dayum, some Japanese Dank Maple right there

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points ago

This comment makes it perfect.

[–]TheJanks 115 points116 points ago

Fatsia japonica

Native to Japan, Aralia is one of the few plants appreciated for its leaves over its blooms. The leaves are palmately lobed and average twelve inches wide, arranged on the end of petioles that can be up to three feet long. “Fatsia” is Japanese for the number eight, as the leaves typically have eight lobes.

If he wants to be more gangster, I highly suggest Vitex agnus-castus, also known (irony here) as the Chaste Tree. We actually had a customer go down to south Texas in his youth and strip down an entire Vitex tree thinking he hit the motherload, then nervously drive 5 hours back to San Antonio and got sick as a dog trying to smoke it.

edit, that's not Fatsia afterall, I just saw the trunk. But I'll be damned I don't let folks here a good 'smoked almost pot' story.

[–]uberguby 16 points17 points ago

Re: edit

It's cool. You can still be a hero. Just for one day.

[–]meee_owth 8 points9 points ago

I, I wish I could swim. Like the dolphins can swim

[–]ISHOTJAMC 3 points4 points ago

But nothing! Can (undecipherable noise anding in 'eh'), We can heroes, just for wurn day.

[–]TheBizness 0 points1 point ago

"Can drive us away"

[–]ISHOTJAMC 0 points1 point ago

Thank you, Mr Bizness, unfortunately, google translate doesn't do Bowie.

[–]WhyYouThinkThat 0 points1 point ago

And here I was thinking you were singing the wallflowers cover.

[–]ISHOTJAMC 1 point2 points ago

I had to go look that up... fucking hilarious.

[–]panthera213 0 points1 point ago

but nothing can tear us away... I think that's the line :)

[–]meee_owth 0 points1 point ago

Lol! I think it's nothing can tear us away. We cern be herroers. Jerst fer wern derr

[–]ISHOTJAMC 1 point2 points ago

Derpid Bowie.

[–]StickFlick -3 points-2 points ago

Ah new a mahn Bojangles, and he dahnced fo yoouuuu. Ihn old woarn owt shoooooeees.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]TheJanks 7 points8 points ago

Agricultural Business Major, however I substituted Horticulture for 90% of the agricultural classes. It was only 2 years after I graduated they got their act together and offered a Horticultural-Business degree ><

Grew up in a wholesale nursery, but I'm more the number cruncher than the horticulturalist.

[–]Krabberfrabber 1 point2 points ago

I hate Fatsia japonica plants with a passion. As soon as they flower, hordes of green blowflies swarm in from bloody everywhere and the plant becomes one buzzing swarming ball of flies. Ugh.

I ended up chopping up the one the last owner of the house planted and digging all its roots up. Murder has never felt so good.

[–]derpymcgoo 5 points6 points ago

Totally read that as "I ended up chopping up the last owner of the house and digging all its roots up."

[–]theodrixx 4 points5 points ago

There. Got all the body parts in the bag.

...Now to find this fucker's ancestors.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Cleome also has the familiar palmate compound leaves that look very similar to those of cannabis, and a growth habit (minus branching) that further adds to the confusion.

I briefly worked with the U.S. Fish and Wildlife in their rehabilitation efforts of the Rocky Mountain Arsenal and learned of the inadvertent planting of cannabis on federal property. I mention it because they took questions of cleome identification very seriously (as to avoid another mix-up, I presume)

[–]LancerJ 0 points1 point ago

“Fatsia” is Japanese for the number eight

More specifically, the 'fatsi' part of the scientific name is equivalent to the modern Japanese 'hachi' which is the number eight.

JP Wikipedia (Yatsude)

[–]WeAllLoveRed 0 points1 point ago

This is weird,, why would he strip the plant of leaves... I'd go for the buds :D

[–]turnleftdale 24 points25 points ago

This kid is 20 now.

[–]towel_tosser 46 points47 points ago

Pics or he didn't age.

[–]Col_Psoas 5 points6 points ago

I 100% agree. how do we know he didn't become a statistic of hood life

[–]bitcheslovedroids -1 points0 points ago

what is turnleftdale is that kid?

[–]towel_tosser 0 points1 point ago

Then pics or YOU didnt age.

[–]qounqer 4 points5 points ago

what if he actually does like heroin or something now.

[–]SyKoHPaTh 3 points4 points ago

It's probably a bag of flour.

[–]NameTak3r 3 points4 points ago

He caramelises sugar in a spoon.

[–]Secres 64 points65 points ago

If you look closely, it's not a real marijuana leaf.

[–]Alias135 12 points13 points ago

If you look closely it's older than the internet.

[–]Acidyo 35 points36 points ago

That dude is so ready for 4/20!

[–]RonPaulFTW12 33 points34 points ago

Yeah but he probably gets beat up every other day of the year too.

[–]Cherrypiez23 11 points12 points ago

I have that sweater too, good sweater.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points ago

Any idea where this pic is from? I'm fairly certain this kid used to live a few doors down from me.

[–]24nm 98 points99 points ago

This kid used to live a few doors away from all of us, friend.

[–][deleted] 32 points33 points ago

It's unsettling to think that he might be the Everyman of an entire generation.

[–]Stewart_Fishington 12 points13 points ago

I had a friend, D, who got off at the same stop as I did in middle school and he had a friend who went to some private catholic school named J. Well one day he's like "Dude, StewieFish... Let's go hang out with J today." so I agreed since I had nothing else to do on that Friday afternoon. We go over to J's house and J's dad lets us hang out with him so we go into the back yard and hang out in J's Treehouse. Well D says "I wish we had some cigarettes or weed." You know, cause they're hardcore middle schoolers and all. Well J says "Dude, my too. But you know what, I had a friend who had a friend who gave me some plants and I planted them next to my house and my parents don't even know. Let me show you." So we go to the side of his house where there's an unbloomed azalea plant and J pulls some leaves off and he looks around and whispers "Let's smoke this shit and get so high. My friend says it was the best he had and I've done it so many times." D is all "Fuck yeah, lets do this weed!" I'm a good kid and didn't participate but I watched them as they went up into J's treehouse and rolled up the azalea leaves in scrap printer paper that was already printed on and started smoking it and started coughing. I'm just like "You alright?" and D goes "Yeah man, cough to get off."

I just watched and the next day when we went to go hang out with J his dad yelled at D for being a negative influence on his son and told me that I "looked like a good kid and shouldn't hang around with hooligans like D."

[–]oldsecondhand 0 points1 point ago

But we have the same carpet!

[–]bigwillFTW 30 points31 points ago

It's from 4chan. It was posted many years ago in a thread about people taking "gangsta" pictures while not being gangsta at all. See "yeah nigga its a dyson". I'm pretty sure its the same thread.

Also, the caption to the picture was something like "i aint no bish, i smoke that hibsicus" or some shit.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points ago

[–]mccscott 6 points7 points ago

poor kid nunchukked hisself into derpville

[–]bigwillFTW 2 points3 points ago

thanks for the nostalgia induced laugh

[–]Overglock -3 points-2 points ago

How the FUCK do you remember your username?

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Overglock 3 points4 points ago

I guess, although living in a flyover state means I only have two area codes to worry about, so there's less to actually memorize.

But honestly, I couldn't tell you 90% of the numbers I have stored in my phone. The memorized ones are the ones I've known since I was a kid (parents, grandparents, etc.).

[–]Spayorneuteryourkids 0 points1 point ago

367-2880

That was the # we had when I was 5. It's the only phone # I remember. I don't even know my current #.

[–]mccscott 4 points5 points ago

rhymes with orange..

[–]pilvy 1 point2 points ago

Hinge

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

Do you have a 4chan archive link to that thread? These are my favorite types of photos on the Internet.

[–]bigwillFTW 1 point2 points ago

sure don't man. but they're out there (google is your friend)

[–]masterofTHUMBS 1 point2 points ago

The weed kid is from 4chan (probably originally from myspace) but the dyson kid is from a something awful thread. There weren't any captions, just a bunch of people posing like pimps and gangstas. There is another picture out there of a guy in a leopard print speedo or something posed with a bunch of money, a gun, and a bunch of guitar hero shit.

[–]OmniaII 1 point2 points ago

[–]my_dog_eats_raw_meat 4 points5 points ago

He's from Poland and this pic was on his facebook or a similar site.

[–]PiTcA 1 point2 points ago

It was on his profile @ nasza-klasa.pl.

[–]tegaychik 2 points3 points ago

Judging by the carpet on the wall - he is from Russia.

[–]Snapperhead 0 points1 point ago

You could sort through the comments in the previous post of this pic http://karmadecay.com/r/funny/comments/shpd8/fuck_the_police/ and see if the source is there. There are many hits on Tineye (awesome reverse image search) for blogs and the answer may be there. This may end up like the number of licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.

[–]kavorka2 8 points9 points ago

We got a serious badass here

[–]dank_hibiscus 7 points8 points ago

Hell yeah, I made my username after this guy!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

I'm so glad I didn't have a digital camera and internet access when I was that age.

Anyway...ahem "Bitches don't know bout my hibiscus."

[–]Xtianpro 9 points10 points ago

It's holocaust remembrance day and this is still the most depressing thing I've seen today

[–]Tenome 7 points8 points ago

[–]mccscott 7 points8 points ago

Done! Now what?

[–]nova-hands 3 points4 points ago

[–]dduckstar 2 points3 points ago

I hope he isn't trying to smoke that dock leaf..

[–]lia_sang 26 points27 points ago

I hope he is. I really hope he is.

[–]eak125 10 points11 points ago

Pics from the ER or it didn't happen!

[–]svengalus 2 points3 points ago

That's some fine looking weed!

[–]mta2011 2 points3 points ago

I wish I was there to witness him smoking it and acting like he's high.

[–]Tastygroove 2 points3 points ago

LOL.. my brother in law thought he found a weed patch.. it was goldenrod... His face swelled like a melon.

[–]Vongkultrup 25 points26 points ago

I'm just a poor boy,smoking on office trees. (To the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody)

[–]RotationSurgeon 9 points10 points ago

He's just a poor boy with really bad trees.

[–]malenkylizards 11 points12 points ago

Spare his fake blunt from the authority!

[–]RotationSurgeon 10 points11 points ago

Easy smoke easy toke, will you let him shotgun blow?

[–]malenkylizards 10 points11 points ago

(Sativa) NOOOO WE WILL NOT LET HIM BLOW.

[–]MBuddah 7 points8 points ago

let him blow!

[–]malenkylizards 7 points8 points ago

(Indica) WE WILL NOT LET HIM BLOW.

[–]Malcolm1044 6 points7 points ago

LET HIM BLOW!

[–]malenkylizards 5 points6 points ago

Blow blow blow blow blow blow blow! OH sensamilla sensamilla sensamiila let me blow!

[–]JIGGER_MY_DIGGER 12 points13 points ago

DONT STOP

BELIEVING

[–]HavocWeaver 3 points4 points ago

Bless his sheltered little heart.

[–]androsiman 5 points6 points ago

9gag sent him

[–]xavmeese 1 point2 points ago

Badass alert.

[–]mynicehat 1 point2 points ago

Nothing better than getting high on cheese plant.

[–]00nixon00 1 point2 points ago

is that the "weed"

[–]SuspiciousQuotes 1 point2 points ago

"weed."

[–]Spirit_of_the_Goose 1 point2 points ago

I hope he didn't find that plant in Australia...

[–]Ampatent 1 point2 points ago

Reddit sure knows how to mock ignorant kids.

[–]formfactor 1 point2 points ago

Comin str8 off the under ground! A white boy got it bad cause I frown!

[–]jesusapproves 1 point2 points ago

Someone, quick, replace it with a stinging plant from australia.

[–]EnorMoose 4 points5 points ago

One repost i'll never downvote

[–]babamcrib 3 points4 points ago

Irish pride worldwide!

[–]Simbus_Rapiens 2 points3 points ago

I gave that bitch a shrubbery, bitches love a shrubbery.

[–]thorneyinak 4 points5 points ago

ahahahahahh

[–]akickintheteeth 1 point2 points ago

Kids these days.

[–]ivanoski-007 1 point2 points ago

SO HARDCORE!!!!! :-0

[–]garythecoconut 1 point2 points ago

tapioca plants actually look pretty close. I had a bunch in my garden and my dad thought I was growing a bunch of trees. From a distance you can't tell.

[–]vertekal 6 points7 points ago

I always wanted to be a pudding farmer.

[–]garythecoconut 1 point2 points ago

oh no... you eat the root of the tapioca kinda like potato. the pudding is not even close. I don't know why anyone would put it in pudding...

[–]vertekal 2 points3 points ago

i eat all my roots in pudding format.

[–]garythecoconut 1 point2 points ago

why was this the first thing I thought of?

[–]vertekal 1 point2 points ago

if they came out with their own line of puddings, that would be awesome

[–]Myflyisbreezy 1 point2 points ago

I bet hes fucked my mother.

[–]thegoodendedhappily 1 point2 points ago

I bet he smokes candy cigarettes, too.

[–]RonPaulFTW12 7 points8 points ago

They don't sell them anymore. Theyre called candy sticks now. True story :/

[–]RotationSurgeon 1 point2 points ago

Is one end at least still colored that sickly pinkish red?

[–]DeLoreanMotorCars 1 point2 points ago

The pack I bought yesterday did not have colored tips.

[–]DeLoreanMotorCars 1 point2 points ago*

I bought a pack of candy cigs yesterday. I hadn't seen them in years. I'll take a pic and upload it.

EDIT- HERE they are if anyone cares. I guess they don't say cigarettes on them anywhere.

[–]Vachii 0 points1 point ago

Surprisingly, this kid is Polish.

[–]olafthebent 0 points1 point ago

Rogue botanist

[–]Offensive_Brute 0 points1 point ago

now the police are gonna murder his dog.

[–]kickerwest 0 points1 point ago

Legalize Marinara

[–]KayleenHunt 0 points1 point ago

Thug life.

[–]Gabriaugangst 0 points1 point ago

This picture is as old as Star Wars ...damn

[–]TheSteinsGate 0 points1 point ago

First thing that popped into my mind

http://youtu.be/gEJHrmliVQw

[–]hippesthipster 0 points1 point ago

LEGALIZE HOUSE PLANTS!

[–]bootnuts 0 points1 point ago

SMOKE DAT ILL FERN, NIGGA!!

[–]sonastyinc 0 points1 point ago

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

last time i saw that picture, i laughed so hard , i fell off your mom.

[–]CraterCroucher 0 points1 point ago

I want to punch that kid so hard.

[–]Qieth 0 points1 point ago

Wait, thats not a... ah :P

[–]RainyDayMissy 0 points1 point ago

http://karmadecay.com/ goddammit use this before posting anything :/.

[–]DavidLeeGoth 0 points1 point ago

What cemetary did you dig these fossils up? Clever poster. :)

[–]modestrat 0 points1 point ago

Funniest picture I have seen in awhile

[–]willybg 0 points1 point ago

People in my class are looking at me right now as I laugh my ass off at this. I don't even know why it was so funny.

[–]johnlukepicard 3 points4 points ago*

Humor consists of dissonance between what was understood and what is understood, by oneself or others. In slapstick, the harm that's not harmful. In schadenfreude, the justice that would not be done that is or the harm that is happening, but not to oneself.

The humor in this is derived from the dissonance between the stereotypical "gangster" and the actuality of a sheltered life.

[–]NanoCow -1 points0 points ago

This gets reposted like once every 3 months

[–]SiddarthaVader -1 points0 points ago

sooooooo ollddddddd

[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points ago

Thug life !!

[–]Sadrockman -2 points-1 points ago

I was that kid.

[–]otakucode -2 points-1 points ago

Mayapple bitches! MAYAPPLE!

[–]blkmamba -2 points-1 points ago

I dont mind reposts but this has been reposted here like a hundred times before.. FML

[–]Lexpar -1 points0 points ago

I'm like 97% sure I knew this kid in high-school. He was 2 grades below me and played bass in a 2 man band with a Sikh guitarist (like the religion, not just spelling "sick" funny). They did Enter Sandman with no vocals for the talent show 2 years in a row.

[–]Nesqwix -4 points-3 points ago

repost

[–]ifihadanickel -2 points-1 points ago

fuck the reposts!

[–]mburke1124 -3 points-2 points ago

I'm going to go out on a limb and say this is one of the top 5 re-posts of all time. I have seen it hundreds of times on different sites around the interweb.

[–]Bart_Mancuso -4 points-3 points ago

STOP FUCKING REPOSTING THIS SHIT!