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WTF

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all 78 comments

[–]ReneFonck 86 points87 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]RamenAvenger 16 points17 points ago

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Thanks for that, the whole text is on snopes for anyone who doesn't want to be blinded by trying to read the image.

[–]shaker28 12 points13 points ago

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Goddammit, this is why you always come to the comments first, shaker28. You KNOW this. Have fun with your headache, jackass.

[–]FeetOfClay7 1 point2 points ago

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Normally, I'm perfectly happy to find these things aren't true, but this one is just too perfect for me not to stick my fingers in my ears, close my eyes and go 'LALALALALALALALALANOTLISTENINGLALALALA' in the face of reality.

[–]chemguy90 30 points31 points ago

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Neither, this is a repost.

[–]jonnynnoj 11 points12 points ago

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i have seen this 3 times this week.

[–]bwukki 10 points11 points ago

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Well congratulations, your penis must be enormous.

[–]InnocuousPenis 6 points7 points ago

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I doubt it.

[–]Their_Police -2 points-1 points ago

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Why does everything suddenly revolve around penis? I don't understand this trend.

[–]bwukki 2 points3 points ago

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Everything has always revolved around penises.

[–]chemguy90 3 points4 points ago

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Especially your mom.

[–]PhoneySoprano 2 points3 points ago

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[–]Zorca99 8 points9 points ago

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I'm seeing lights after reading this.

[–]richaad 17 points18 points ago

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Hypothetical scenario used to get people thinking.

Oh, and in Magnolia.

[–]Mr_Bugg 3 points4 points ago

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This. Tom Cruise playing himself ftw

[–]ins4n1ty 4 points5 points ago

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All Cruise jokes aside, I think this was his best best work to date.

[–]InnocuousPenis 4 points5 points ago

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Doesn't he always?

[–]karikamiya1234 3 points4 points ago

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not wtf

[–]ChocolateShein 5 points6 points ago

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http://www.snopes.com/horrors/freakish/opus.asp Check your sources before posting.

[–]anon72c 7 points8 points ago

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I can't believe that more people don't recognize this. It was in the movie Magnolia, along with a few others.

Here you go

[–]veillux 12 points13 points ago

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[–]cclementi6 6 points7 points ago

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Thank you. SO MUCH.

[–]freemanposse 2 points3 points ago

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tl;dr for those who still can't or don't want to read that: Person A jumps out of a window in order to commit suicide while, several stories below, Person B attempts to shoot Person C, his wife, with a shotgun. B misses, the shot goes through the window and hits A on the way down. An autopsy determines that it was, in fact, the shotgun blast that killed A, which would make it the murder of A by B. The first twist is that B had only been waving around the gun because it thought it was unloaded, and it had accidentally discharged. The second twist is that B and C's son had loaded the gun secretly, hoping to get B to shoot C, so that B's son would inherit. The third and final twist is that A was in fact B's and C's son, making the whole thing a suicide.

[–]JacobCurry 2 points3 points ago

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You forgot that neither B nor A knew that there was a safety net that was installed to protect some building workers.

[–]catherineruth 0 points1 point ago

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Your tl;dr needs a tl;dr. :-p

[–]blueshiftlabs 0 points1 point ago

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tl(tl;dr)dr: Fake.

[–]DalvadorSali 2 points3 points ago

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Incase anyone hasn't seen it, the beginning of Magnolia:

http://youtu.be/xZCteWofrMM?t=2m15s

[–]imkidding 4 points5 points ago

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You win the award for hardest to read picture in reddit history. Congrats!

[–]gloomdoom 3 points4 points ago

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I HAVE SEEN MAGNOLIA AS WELL.

[–]Pottypa 1 point2 points ago

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this is a conundrum

[–]P-Dot-Guillemot13 1 point2 points ago

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This doesn't make sense... You can't be charged with murder for "LOADING A GUN" . Come on

[–]DaHolk 4 points5 points ago

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How about you switch ammunition on a stage gun?

[–]thedeejus 1 point2 points ago

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I was going to post this to reddit last time I saw it, but my mom picked up the phone and it kicked the modem offline

[–]stylefish 3 points4 points ago

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Seen it already, so glad I could avoid permanent eye damage.

[–]Sir_TyAllister 4 points5 points ago

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Fucking awesome, but it's a repost. So downvote.

[–]nitwittery 1 point2 points ago

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I normally resist calling out reposts, especially seeing as Reddit is primarily a link sharing website which means that reposting content essentially lies at its core.. but C'MON! This one is just getting ridiculous..

[–]footstepsfading 3 points4 points ago

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This is the first I've seen it.

~1 year 9 months.

[–]webchimp32 0 points1 point ago

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First time I've seen it in over a year on here.

[–]Captain_Redonculus -1 points0 points ago

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OLD AS FUCK. Repost.

[–]Nero92 0 points1 point ago

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MOTHER FUCKIN REPOST

[–]rebo 1 point2 points ago

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This is older than the internet.

[–]awesomemanftw 0 points1 point ago

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It originated in 1987, so yes

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Healkat 2 points3 points ago

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Hey, I enjoyed it. Never saw it before. Have my upvote.

[–]loercase 0 points1 point ago

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These sort of hypotheticals are the meat-and-potatoes of any study of tort or criminal law. While I am not a lawyer myself, I enjoyed discussing these with some friends of mine who were. Lots of fun and crazy situations to make up!

[–]dwilliams292 0 points1 point ago

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Did a report on this exact urban legend my first semester of college. Pretty pointless assignment really.

[–]Youngsterjoey72 0 points1 point ago

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I'd have to say homicide.

[–]Carosello 0 points1 point ago

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my head...my head...

[–]Areoseph 0 points1 point ago

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DIRECTED BY M NIGHT SHYAMALAN.

[–]tchiseen 0 points1 point ago

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[–]av4rice 0 points1 point ago

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[–]w33d 0 points1 point ago

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way better version: http://i.imgur.com/2Z5Sd.png

[–]BigSwedenMan 0 points1 point ago

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M Night Shyamalan could learn a thing or two from this

[–]Lord_Vectron 0 points1 point ago

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Was awesome till it claimed to be a true story, then it instantly became one of those stupid chain mails your grandmother sends you.

[–]brosenfeld 0 points1 point ago

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Where's that tl;dr bot?

[–]Joshwarudd 0 points1 point ago

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Contains suspense, mystery and drama, all in one story. 10/10 would read again

[–]octopussperm 0 points1 point ago

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Give it a point if you didn't take the time to read it!! -^

[–]Gadsden 0 points1 point ago

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Inconceivable!

[–]40ozToFreedom 0 points1 point ago

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My eyes!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Sounds like it should be an old episode of Thriller.

[–]webchimp32 1 point2 points ago

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I know CSI have had similar cases of WTFery, like the time they had an old couple dead in a locked room. Turned out, their cat and parrot hated each other and in mid fight they managed to set off a chain of events that killed the old couple. One in the shower and one in the kitchen.

[–]n-some 0 points1 point ago

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I watched a movie that started with a nearly identical story to this, and forgot its title.

[–]jbrown209209 0 points1 point ago

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So, just so we are clear, is this a true story or no?

[–]jferron23 0 points1 point ago

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Mind=Blown. Pun intended.

[–]smegmar_IV 0 points1 point ago

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i think it would be manslaughter

[–]zepsuta 0 points1 point ago

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Obviously, smurdicide.

[–]Aelwrath 0 points1 point ago

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[–]Skrivz 0 points1 point ago

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Made an account just to comment, but this happened literally the day I was born

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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It didn't happen, so no, it didn't.

[–]timtimcheroo 0 points1 point ago

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Everything else on reddit looks so hard to read now that I read that

[–]wallieburger 0 points1 point ago

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old urban legend that never actually happend

[–]robbor 0 points1 point ago

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How are you supposed to read that?

[–]NoRaptors 0 points1 point ago

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It was an interesting story, but everything looked fuzzy when I looked back at non-blurry text after reading it.

[–]LOOGI3 -1 points0 points ago

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TL:DR

[–]Dondondondon -5 points-4 points ago

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Dafuq did I just read.

[–]pikapika412 -4 points-3 points ago

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Suicide.

[–]mangarooboo -5 points-4 points ago

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I haven't read this yet but I just wanted to say it happened (or whatever) on my third birthday. O_o