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1278
1279

In case you forgot how big whales were (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by NoJowk

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[–]springerfinger 152 points153 points ago

I don't care how friendly they are.. I find that terrifying.

[–]down_vote_magnet 37 points38 points ago

Deep water gives me the creeps as it is, let alone if I saw a huge dark shadow like that. You ever get that thing when you're swimming out in the sea and suddenly NOPE MUST GET OUT MUST GET BACK TO SHORE RIGHT NOW OH FUCK I CAN'T SEE WHERE MY LEGS ARE.

[–]Amunium 5 points6 points ago

Agreed. I once had a diesel submarine sail under me while I was out in a small three-man boat. Fucking scariest moment of my life, even though I knew nothing would happen and that they wouldn't surface without checking for boats first.

[–]Nayr747 3 points4 points ago

Actually there was a story a couple years ago about an Navy submarine that surfaced and accidentally cut a boat that was above it in half.

[–]cpverne 4 points5 points ago

Ehime Maru and USS Greeneville collision

[–]Nayr747 6 points7 points ago

I get that, except it's all the time. Even looking at or thinking about unclear or deep water. I've even been freaked out drinking opaque fluids a couple times.

[–]lolzergimba 0 points1 point ago

Creatures of the deep thread!

[–]GT90 52 points53 points ago

I would literally shit, piss, and vomit myself at the same from fear if I was in those waters

[–]eightballart 73 points74 points ago

Unfortunately, the smell of shit, piss, and vomit will drive a whale into a bloodlust frenzy, which will only seal your fate.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]SurferDude 17 points18 points ago

And then realized I was a Blowhole.

FTFY.

[–]AbrahamVanHelsing 4 points5 points ago

Blowhole : Nostril :: Asshole : Asshole

I see the joke you're trying to make, but I hail from /r/askscience. Anatomical inaccuracies are intolerable even - nay, especially - for humor.

[–]french_guy_al 20 points21 points ago

Way to kill the mood, blowhole!

[–]AbrahamVanHelsing 10 points11 points ago

Any time, asshole!

[–]I_REMOVE_COCKS 11 points12 points ago

Well that was pleasant.

[–]soal1 7 points8 points ago

The nicest person in this thread is named I_REMOVE_COCKS. Reddit is a strange and wonderful place.

[–]rEdvfs 0 points1 point ago

same here, guy

[–]dick_long_wigwam 1 point2 points ago

my penis would turn into a vagina

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

I've swam with them in Tonga. They are gentle giants.

[–]redjoe89 14 points15 points ago

I always post this when people start talking about whales. This is the sole reason I became so terrified of them: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OcFFwb4Wh_Q

Here is another, almost real life version of it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoP1N0OyFic

[–]funkyb 4 points5 points ago

If it makes you feel better I believe most whales throats are far too small to swallow you.

[–]redjoe89 5 points6 points ago

It does not.

[–]springerfinger 0 points1 point ago

I remember that commercial. I'd have to say it was Lake Placid or Jaws that really sparked the fear. Any time there's more than 4 feet under me I get spooked.

[–]Infermon 0 points1 point ago

To get over your fear. Just play Zelda Ocerina of Time. That will train you if you are ever in that situation.

[–]SplurgyA 0 points1 point ago

And here's another video about a whale

[–]MiloMuggins 20 points21 points ago

That looks like a Right whale. As big as that one is, they aren't even a particularly big species of whale. Roughly half the length of a Blue whale.

[–]Amunium 15 points16 points ago

Half sounds right. Right whale + left whale = blue whale.

[–]prmaster23 9 points10 points ago

They are not going to eat you but one unintentional hit from that tail and you could be history.

[–]lizzindc 7 points8 points ago

I am also terrified of this picture. I'm actually terrified of whales, even orcas freak me out a bit.

[–]uk2knerf 14 points15 points ago

Well orcas would be most likely to kill you so...

[–]lizzindc 1 point2 points ago

Yeah, but they are little and fill me with a normal amount of fear. I'm also not really massively afraid of sharks, because I know what they are going to do. It's just the giant ones like the rights and the humpbacks.

sigh.

[–]mastermrt 5 points6 points ago

Orcas are NOT little.

[–]lizzindc 2 points3 points ago

Well, no. but compared to a humpback they aren't as big. I chose the wrong word.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Aren't Orcas technically in the dolphin family?

[–]lizzindc 0 points1 point ago

Yes, I believe so. I'm thinking of them like tomatoes in this scenario. Technically they are a fruit, but functionally they are a vegetable.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Thank you for that wizardry. Carry on.....

[–]gdlmaster 5 points6 points ago

Well, Orcas are KILLER whales, so that makes some sense.

[–]lizzindc 4 points5 points ago

What's weird is that I'm easiest with Orcas because they are small (relatively). The big ones like right and humpback whales scare the SHIT out of me. I'm actually wishing I didn't comment because now I have the fucking thumbnail staring from the corner of my screen.

Also, I'm from New England. I always get asked to go whale watching by visiting friends, and I look like a dick if I don't go. sigh.

[–]gdlmaster 5 points6 points ago

Humpback whales don't even have teeth.

I get what you're saying, though. They're huge and the sounds they make run shivers down my spine.

Also, Shamoo is an Orca and has attacked people. I think he actually killed one. Maybe two.

[–]lizzindc 2 points3 points ago

Have you actually seen baleen? I'm not saying they could attack or anything, but baleen isn't exactly streamers. Women made corset stays from them, and if I got accidentally swallowed there would be no Jonah or Geppetto situation. Most of the deaths that are caused by whales are actually either accidents or wrong place wrong time...because they are gigantic. the size scares the CRAP out of me.

[–]gdlmaster 0 points1 point ago

I know. The "no teeth" comment was more of a joke, really. Clearly, whales can kill people. It doesn't take a lot of effort on their part.

[–]lizzindc 0 points1 point ago

no, not at all. And I did get the joke, I just got caught in the cycle of panic! Sigh, I'm never going to be able to go out in the deep ocean again.

[–]lolzergimba 2 points3 points ago

These scare me the most.

[–]lizzindc 2 points3 points ago

It's humpbacks for me. I think because I'm from New England and I see them everywhere, and those were the ones that startled me on whale watching trips as a kid. Also, I clicked even though I shouldn't have and was presently surprised that it was only the main Wiki.

[–]manueslapera 1 point2 points ago

Their heart is bigger than you. I guess that means their capacity of love is also huge.

[–]EthicalReasoning 0 points1 point ago

go whale watching sometime, it will change your opinion

[–]lizzindc 0 points1 point ago

Funnily enough, at least for me, the opposite is true. I've been whale watching and that is when my phobia began. I'm from New England, so I've been a few times. Seeing a humpback swimming right next to the boat gave me a terrible fright, and I was scared that he would bump the boat and knock us into the water.

Of course, this wouldn't happen for obvious reasons but I was still scared.

[–]EthicalReasoning 0 points1 point ago

whaleophobia

[–]we_love_dassie 0 points1 point ago

That's not even the largest whale. Iirc, a blue whale is roughly double that size...

[–]I_hate_whales 121 points122 points ago

I didn't forget.

[–]Scatman_Crothers 47 points48 points ago

Redditor for 7 months

[–]I_hate_whales 21 points22 points ago

It was my moment.

[–]52Hzwhale 5 points6 points ago

ಠ_ಠ

[–]rorykane 7 points8 points ago

fight fight fight

[–]Crim91 67 points68 points ago

Are. They aren't extinct.

[–]merripen 53 points54 points ago

Yet.

[–]down_vote_magnet 11 points12 points ago

Well, this thread took a sharp downturn.

[–]sheepyowl 1 point2 points ago

dat username

[–]UtenaV -1 points0 points ago

Soon...

[–]I_RECTIFY_GRAMMAR 11 points12 points ago

Whales were big. They still are, but they were too.

[–]ImNotAWhaleBiologist 20 points21 points ago

Holy shit! That makes me want to study whales.

[–]poeticdisaster 6 points7 points ago

I agree. They are friggin awesome creatures :)

[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points ago

No. NO! JESUS IS THE ONLY WAY!! FORGET YOUR WHALE MUBBLY JUMBLY.

[–]shawnpeps 11 points12 points ago

That would be so awesome.

I wonder how something the size of a blue whale would react to a person in the water near it?

I know humpbacks and some other whales are super curious but blue whales seem like they'd be all "I don't even know what you are, you're so small."

[–]dorianp 6 points7 points ago

In case your forgot how big the universe is: http://htwins.net/scale2/ It has a whale compared to a human in the scale, which is why I was reminded of the website.

[–]AndersonCoopersDick 17 points18 points ago

2 Fun whale facts of the day: 1) Blue Whale penises are 12 ft long 2) Blue Whale testicles weight 1000 pounds each

[–]fondlemeLeroy 11 points12 points ago

Anderson Coopers dick just taught me about whale testicles. I've never been so honored.

[–]NoJowk[S] 15 points16 points ago

...and cums about 30 gallons.

[–]Piratcykel 12 points13 points ago

http://www.wdcs.co.uk/media/flash/whalebanner/content_pub_en.html

Real size blue-whale, enjoy!

[–]justbenicetopeople 17 points18 points ago

anyone else get scared of this even though IT WAS ON THEIR COMPUTER SCREEN? Freaked me the fuck out.

[–]SomewhatLacking 1 point2 points ago

Yep, was getting chills so bad I couldn't even scroll past the entire eye frame.

Snakes and spiders I'm cool with. These muther-fuckers freak me out so bad though.

[–]aerynmoo 0 points1 point ago

The eye freaked me out. I screamed and closed the tab, lol.

[–]Freelancer68 4 points5 points ago

Why is that so terrifying???

[–]FiL-dUbz 0 points1 point ago

Borat voice Very nice.

[–]Wilhelm_Amenbreak 5 points6 points ago

....and that is why the ocean is salty.

[–]sheriffmclawdawg 0 points1 point ago

Damn, I just made this joke and then I scrolled down and saw you beat me to it! You must have an excellent sense of humor.

[–]Wilhelm_Amenbreak 4 points5 points ago

If it makes you feel any better, I noticed after I made this comment that someone else had already made it further down the thread. So there are at least three of us that are comedic geniuses. We should probably get together and form a comedy troupe or something.

[–]sheriffmclawdawg 2 points3 points ago

Why do you think the ocean is so salty??

[–]gambl3r 0 points1 point ago

They say a dolphin ejaculates with such ferocity that it might decapitate you.

[–]Major_Butthurt 2 points3 points ago

I would forget, but yo momma constantly reminds me.

[–]Nuggetized 0 points1 point ago

Okay, that wasn't bad.

[–]EsotericNinja 9 points10 points ago

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title comnts points age /r/
Whales are Large [650x960] 9coms 168pts 2mos waterporn
If you didn't realize how large whales were already... 902coms 2042pts 2mos pics
Whale Kiting 14coms 95pts 14dys pics

source: karmadecay

-_-

[–]poeticdisaster 1 point2 points ago

You just made my day- i didn't know there was r/waterporn :) <3

[–]JoelDaMan 3 points4 points ago

"Admiral, there be whales here!"

[–]CalmDownOverThere 0 points1 point ago

"It's a trap!!!"

[–]mcartz33 5 points6 points ago

It's crazy to think but that whale is probably at least 50m below sea level.

[–]Eddh123 1 point2 points ago

rule no.1: never forget how big whales are.

[–]panda_assassin 1 point2 points ago

It always amazes me when I actually try to conceive how large whales actually get. On top of that, the fact that the largest animals on this planet generally feed on the smallest animals on the planet, mind blowing.

[–]DeSanti 1 point2 points ago

Pretty sure that depends on the type of whale. Some whales can be comparatively small like the harbour porpoise and the white-beaked dolphin. But of course, some whales are gargantuan, and we have to respect that. Respect and cherish that fact.

[–]redcobalt_qxrf 1 point2 points ago

Kinda looks like a shark on its side. CAN'T UNSEE.

[–]TronaldMcDonald 1 point2 points ago

i would have the largest fear boner this side of the eastern seaboard

[–]ConorMaximus 1 point2 points ago

Photos like this are scary as hell.

[–]Major_Error 1 point2 points ago

You know how big whales are? People use whale as like a synonym for GOD DAMN GIGANTIC, that's how big whales are!

[–]newtothemarket 1 point2 points ago

no- this is just a reminder of how small that one kiteboarder is

[–]chefmcduck 1 point2 points ago

One day, whales everywhere are gonna rise up, leave their oceans and fight back against the human race.

This is now the plot of a new Nicolas Cage movie.

[–]Raziel66 1 point2 points ago

Can anyone help me find a certain whale picture? I tried a while back but didn't have any luck.

The pic is of a guy free diving, just a snorkel in his mouth and fins on, and he's facing a giant whale shark or something.

The picture was taken from a decent distance away so you truly see how tiny he is compared to the whale. I know I've seen it on Reddit before but just can't find it...

[–]Nuggetized 1 point2 points ago

I think I know what you're talking about. I can't search for it on my phone, but I'm very tempted to say I saw it over in r/animalporn.

[–]Kiristo 1 point2 points ago

I think I'd be ok with avoiding the deeper parts of the ocean my whole life.

[–]silverphoenix48 1 point2 points ago

How about a Blue Whale next to ya!!

[–]kornflakez 4 points5 points ago

Impressive pic

[–]thegoldminer 1 point2 points ago

this dude had to be pissing in his board shorts.

[–]nmc94 0 points1 point ago

That would scare the hell out of me!!! :O

[–]raoul_llamas_duke 0 points1 point ago

form a whale watching boat it's awesome. from a tiny board like that it's SWEET JEEBUS SAVE ME

[–]ieatglass 0 points1 point ago

NOPE.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Thank you for destroying years of therapy....I am not back to square one...terrified of whales

[–]poeticdisaster 0 points1 point ago

That is a beautiful picture and they are amazing creatures :)

[–]ZaphodXZaphod 0 points1 point ago

Massive sea animals are one of the few things that still fill me with a sense of awe. It is kind of unbelievable that things this large exist. I've even seen them up close on boat tours and such, but it just seems fantastical that such a thing could even be.

[–]Rejexted 0 points1 point ago

Something about the way that sail is oriented breaks my brainphysics

[–]felipeds 0 points1 point ago

wait.. dude is wakeboarding on a sail boat?

[–]landragoran 0 points1 point ago

he's kiteboarding - basically wakeboarding with a parasail providing thrust instead of a boat.

[–]boxxa 0 points1 point ago

I nearly shit my pants when I fish swims past me in open water. If I look down and there is a whale, I probably would never go in water again.

[–]TaintTickler 0 points1 point ago

They could swallow you and never even know it. Then you'd be like Lemmiwinks stuck up Mr. Slave's ass.

[–]mushmancat 0 points1 point ago

I totally forgot!

[–]MoonisHarshMistress 0 points1 point ago

It...it is...it is... KRAKEN!!!!

[–]dsr541 0 points1 point ago

How big they "were"? Where did they go?

[–]Rajio 0 points1 point ago

TIL Whales are big.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Shop

[–]iSukz 0 points1 point ago

I despise large objects. Whales are #1 on my list.

[–]leche08 0 points1 point ago

seent it.

[–]kingofallwinners 0 points1 point ago

Let's boo this repost!

[–]nianubisn1 0 points1 point ago

I still think its a shark on its side. Oh btw nice repost noob.

[–]SC0TTBL4M 0 points1 point ago

We always get sad about big dinosaurs being extinct, but we always pass over these colossal creatures.

[–]UtenaV 0 points1 point ago

Call me Ishmael.

[–]sports__fan 0 points1 point ago

One of my bucket list items is to see a blue whale up close and in person. Either from a boat or in the water with it.

[–]IamGrimReefer 0 points1 point ago

wait, so whales are extinct now or you just don't know the difference between "are" and "were"?

[–]ratguy 0 points1 point ago

This is most likely a photoshop. For a kite surfer to be kicking up that much spray he would need to be moving along fast which requires a fairly strong wind. That much wind should be causing white caps all over the rest of the water. The photo of the whale looks to be taken in much less windy conditions.

[–]MustardOrPants 0 points1 point ago

So, they were that big? Well what in the world happened to them, and how big are they now?

[–]p00f1ng3r 0 points1 point ago

One of the more terrifying kiteboarding photos I've ever seen.

[–]codethevoid 0 points1 point ago

I NEVER FORGET HOW BIG WHALES ARE.

[–]shiznik 0 points1 point ago

Kind of hard to forget with how often this gets reposted.

[–]zang99 0 points1 point ago

No no i haven't forgot

[–]StrikingCrayon 0 points1 point ago

I'm so glad whales don't eat people, that we know of atleast.

[–]JAHearthmother 0 points1 point ago

daaaaaaaaaaang.

[–]timz45 0 points1 point ago

Not only is this a repost, I used the exact same sentence to describe , good job

[–]timz45 1 point2 points ago

http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/p8mo1/if_you_didnt_realize_how_large_whales_were_already/

[–]NoJowk[S] 0 points1 point ago

haha, for some reason this picture has been burnt into my brain the last few months....your post was more popular anyway

[–]timz45 0 points1 point ago

haha :-P

[–]Monika133 0 points1 point ago

It looks like a shark instead of a whale

[–]anonymousHacker 0 points1 point ago

In case you forgot this is a repost.

[–]horse_a_piece -2 points-1 points ago

"Saint Diego, I think it means a whales vagina!"

[–]fondlemeLeroy 7 points8 points ago

Hey that's my favorite line from Schindler's List!

[–]not_the_droids -4 points-3 points ago

KVWN-TV Channel 4 scumbag!

[–]religionkills -1 points0 points ago

Or how small WE are.

[–]BossHogBarbarian -3 points-2 points ago

Blue Whale penises are 12 feet long and weigh 1000 pounds. This allows them to produce over 30 gallons of semen during orgasm...

And you wonder why the ocean is so salty.

[–]donaldodie 1 point2 points ago

mmmm delicious

[–]jamduck -2 points-1 points ago

Good guy whale could eat you.... Swim close enough to surface to get great picture.

[–]superanth -1 points0 points ago

Er, that thing has teeth. Is it a shark??

[–]JizzPoweredSteamboat -3 points-2 points ago

Doesn't water magnify shit?

[–]notdazedjustconfused -2 points-1 points ago

I

[–]cgil9000 -4 points-3 points ago

In case you forgot how effective reposting is.

[–]B-blah -2 points-1 points ago

Thank you so much, was sitting here just hoping that someone would remind me -_-

[–]Roflkopt3r -2 points-1 points ago

I haven't forgotten, because this pic was posted so often already.

[–]EdWrathChild -5 points-4 points ago

I can't see it. Is it under your mom's dildo? heh.

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