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top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]Frack-Star 456 points457 points ago

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Bitches love big veins. Especially nurses.

[–]aleandwhores 743 points744 points ago

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Nurse here.

I would murder to start an IV on him.

[–]lethal_weapon_five 411 points412 points ago

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Nursing student here. I would murder to learn how to start an IV on him.

[–]AgreesWithIdiots 636 points637 points ago

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IV here. I would learn to murder nursing students.

[–]soggy_cereal 948 points949 points ago

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VI here. Afraid of VII because VII VIII IX.

[–]Saihna 402 points403 points ago

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[–]hobovision 20 points21 points ago

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[–]ww6so7 46 points47 points ago

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the prophecy has been fulfilled

[–]Osmodius 11 points12 points ago

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That was fucking perfect.

[–]horseyhorseyhorsey 148 points149 points ago

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murderer here. i would murder all of you. murder.

[–]Effthebitch 38 points39 points ago

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Even after all the talk of IV's, I read yours as 4, for some stupid fucking reason. Let's just say I was completely lost for a few seconds.

[–]amateursuperhero 43 points44 points ago

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Murder here. I would IV to learn nursing students.

[–]didntVoteObama 30 points31 points ago

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I here. Students would nurse to learn IV murder.

[–]nachopoop789 1 point2 points ago

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student here. IV would love to murder nurses

[–]Phartatron 3 points4 points ago

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Everything I just read is exactly why I love reddit so much...

[–]AmIKrumpingNow 2 points3 points ago

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True, but with all these comments, you would have thought someone would have already mentioned "IV play" with a nurse...

[–]Clintonon 37 points38 points ago

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When I give blood they direct the "noob nurse" to get to poking on my arm.

[–]lethal_weapon_five 48 points49 points ago

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only way we learn... sorry about the bruises

[–]something_facetious 48 points49 points ago

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I have had so many medical procedures done by people who were learning. It bugs my mom that I always say yes when they ask me "Is it okay if we have so-and-so do this? He has done a few before, but he's still learning" or "Is it okay if one of our students sits in on the procedure?" Honestly, I've never had a med student screw something up, but I have had doctors screw things up.

I figure if I'm going to be in the hospital so much, I might as well teach the next generation that is going to be taking care of me.

[–]alison09 38 points39 points ago

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You're the hero we students need.

[–]something_facetious 22 points23 points ago

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Well, the students are the heroes that everyone else will need. It's a small sacrifice to make if a student needs to learn how to do an IV or sit in on a surgery or something. I have a lot of faith in students.

[–]alison09 7 points8 points ago

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I really appreciate that. Sometimes when I observe/assist I worry if I'm making the patient uncomfortable. I'm glad there's people like you out there :)

[–]joe144 4 points5 points ago

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Had a cyst removed from my balls and the young trainee nurse started crying while trying to change the bandage as it started bleeding. Story of my life hot girl with my balls in her hand and she starts crying.

[–]Jagjamin 4 points5 points ago

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Is it ok if we have a student sit in?

I've always said yes. Normally because I'm not undergoing something super-awkward.

iirc, a general checkup, an eye-flush, a broken collarbone.

[–]something_facetious 6 points7 points ago

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I don't think I've ever had a pap smear where a student was not in the room. lol It is an awkward procedure, but hey, how are they going to know what kinds of things to look for if they don't see a specimen?

[–]lethal_weapon_five 3 points4 points ago

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Thank you for that.

[–]something_facetious 2 points3 points ago

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You're very welcome. :-)

[–]naimina 20 points21 points ago

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I don't know what country you're in but in Sweden you can request that a doctor does it and they aren't allowed to say no.

I have a phobia for needles and used to do this until my brother married a nurse and she told me about how important it is for especially new nurses to stick it in you for both training and for mental health if they continue to work as a nurse. Getting trusted and stuff like that.

Btw I'm high and may or may not make zero sense.

[–]lethal_weapon_five 23 points24 points ago

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for sure you can ask a doctor to do it. But that doesnt mean a doctor is always around around. Any phlebotomist or nurse in an ER is just as skilled to perform an IV insertion. Also, the more you do it the better you are at it. A first year resident will not be as skilled in IV insertions as a nurse with 25 years in the profession.

[–]groundcontroltodan 1 point2 points ago

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I once went to the ER at a hospital quite early in the AM. After plenty of hoop jumping and quite a long wait someone finally came into the room to remove my IV and get me discharged.

This someone was not the nurse that inserted my IV, but quite a young resident. I'm sitting there thinking that, hey, you know- a doctor is going to remove my IV. Everything should go better than expected.

Nope.

He either didn't know, didn't remember, or didn't care to apply pressure as he pulled the needle- he yanked the thing like a cheap magician tugging a tablecloth. I jettisoned blood all over the room.

[–]lgyure85 1 point2 points ago

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I would never trust a doctor to do an IV. Just saying. Depending on what unit you're in, the nurses may be doing upwards of 20 IVs a day. The doctors may have done a few in med school. Just because they have a higher degree, doesn't mean they are more skilled at getting a good and painless IV. If you don't trust the nurse, have the IV team or phlebotomist do it.

[–]Roik 19 points20 points ago*

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about how important it is for especially new nurses to stick it in you for both training and for mental health if they continue to work as a nurse.

I...

stick it in you for both training and for mental health

Pfffffftch!

[–]lefty_lefterson 11 points12 points ago

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Phlebotomy team nurses are always more skilled than the intern or resident that gets asked to do it, and it's a common subject of conversation. But when it has to get done it gets done by the MD one way or another, because there is nobody left to defer to.

[–]Tastygroove 1 point2 points ago

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Upvote for redditing while high... It's the only way to go.

[–]MisterNixon 1 point2 points ago

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If you aren't comfortable having someone new stick you then you should not have them do it just for the sake of experience. It's your arm after all and there will be others who would be more comfortable with it.

[–]Kozark 2 points3 points ago

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prenursing student here.

holy shit being a nurse is gonna be awesome.

[–]silveringrid[!] 9 points10 points ago

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Dialysis Tech here, I'd love to put a 15gauge in that.

[–]aleandwhores 13 points14 points ago

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15gauge = IV insanity mode.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Electro_Syphilis 1 point2 points ago

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This just got out of hand.

[–]Misanthropic_Owl 2 points3 points ago

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Ah, the ballpoint pen of IV equipment...

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]dcss 52 points53 points ago

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And heroin users.

[–]geni91782 9 points10 points ago

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And lab techs.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points ago

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Bitches love big veins a vascular man.

[–]kt00na 22 points23 points ago

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Actually, nurses hate those big bulging veins. They tend to just move out of the way and deflect needles.

[–]ThisisDangeruss 19 points20 points ago

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yeahhh but they still work. Better big veins than no veins.

[–]didntVoteObama 22 points23 points ago

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no veins means you'd be dead.

[–]PuckGoodfellow 17 points18 points ago

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I have hidden veins that a phlebotomist told me were "the size of a 3 year old's." When donating blood, I might as well have no veins. It sucks.

[–]Xeeman 1 point2 points ago

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Pedo dracula loves you.

[–]jemayb 8 points9 points ago

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As a vet tech, I can confirm this (great danes, mastiffs, etc.). Needles just seem to bounce off of them.

[–]phedredragon 4 points5 points ago

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Yes but they're still better than those tiny kitten veins. Nothing like trying to draw blood off an 8 week old kitten with no visible veins and 5 million needle teeth.

[–]Pinky01 1 point2 points ago

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kinda remind me of horse veins ( vet tech in training here). But i would rather try a big vein with my thumb to stablize then tiny kitten veins

[–]PersianBob 1 point2 points ago

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Those veins scream 14 gauge.

[–]FriendlyBassplayer 1 point2 points ago

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You're exactly right. I am an extremely veiny guy, people always make the same comment: "man it must be easy to get an IV in one of those huh". But the truth is not the same.

One time I got sick and threw up and pooped until I was so dehydrated I could barely move. My dad's a doctor and my mom's a nurse and they were taking care of me at home, and brought some IVs for me. 10 minutes later they still couldn't get the IV on top of my hand, and my dad got a little frustrated so he became a bit more "firm" and poked it in a weird angle and a single spray-line of blood flew out of my vein like 3 feet out and my mom was yelling at him for being a jerk. They just gave up and put it on the inside of my elbow which sucks but it's slightly more doable.

[–]MudvayneMW 1 point2 points ago

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Yea I'm pretty vascular and the one time I gave blood she stuck me 4 times before she got it

[–]jtfine 261 points262 points ago

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AKIRA!!

[–]Bitofall 198 points199 points ago

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TETSUO!!!!!

[–]MustStopMasturbating 238 points239 points ago

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CANADA!!!!!

[–]Scaryfedoraman 87 points88 points ago

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Your name is Brandon, and you masturbated to your parents.

[–]awesomemanftw 73 points74 points ago*

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My name is Brandon, and this comment caught me off guard. And I didn't.

EDIT: guard not gourd

[–]Vandrel 83 points84 points ago

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I hate it when people catch me off of my gourd.

[–]awesomemanftw 43 points44 points ago

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...fuck

[–]Bigman6693 1 point2 points ago

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OH MY FREAKIN GOURD!!!

[–]barker279 1 point2 points ago

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He shall carry that burden with him for his entire reddit career.

[–]hypnotoad6 1 point2 points ago

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I have him tagged as the same thing. Just so I'll never forget.

[–]bscoop 24 points25 points ago

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THAT'S MR KANEDA TO YOU, PUNK

[–]noddegamra 13 points14 points ago

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This reminds me of the suits in Gantz.

[–]Defender 111 points112 points ago

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[–]rudiegonewild 39 points40 points ago

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quagmire is a lefty

[–]toejam119 60 points61 points ago

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much easier, you'll free your right hand for the mouse

[–]GarenBushTerrorist 6 points7 points ago

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And people have always wondered why I do that. This man knows.

[–]kojak488 7 points8 points ago

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That was the best bit about breaking my right wrist. I've never turned back since then.

[–]AgreesWithIdiots 6 points7 points ago

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It's always felt more natural that way.

[–]nsharp01 25 points26 points ago

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That is Frank McGrath's arm.

[–]ilikefarts 4 points5 points ago

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100% correct, this is a pretty famous pic of his.

[–]dudekevin 1 point2 points ago

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this.

[–]otabek1 214 points215 points ago

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Too much fapping

[–]petekill 239 points240 points ago

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I'm amazed that I had to scroll this far down to find a masturbation joke. Get your shit together, Reddit.

[–]dudewheresalec 36 points37 points ago

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the quagmire video was kinda the climax of the joke

[–]OgGorrilaKing 29 points30 points ago

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You could even say that the joke's come and gone.

[–]tihssihtkcuf 3 points4 points ago

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climax

[–]Reddevil313 25 points26 points ago

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I really wish this was posted in r/askscience or r/answers so we could actually find out what is going on here.

[–]Lord_Denning_Fan 2 points3 points ago

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His name is Frank McGrath. Professional bodybuilder.

[–]PrepareForLies 45 points46 points ago

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Uhhh thats gross! What do you think he is taking...and where can you get it. Be specific.

[–]RotationSurgeon 84 points85 points ago

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It's just a topographical map of European waterways.

[–]cajual 10 points11 points ago

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[–]Ctofaname 1 point2 points ago

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Its Frank Mcgrath if memory serves me right.. its been a long time since I've seen this picture...

but he is just incredibly vascular.. I've seen similarly vascular people at the gym as well and while I've never been anywhere near that vascular I have a similar highway map on my forearm when i flex. Especially if I pump my arm a few times first.

You don't have to take anything special.. just need to be very active with a low body fat.. and solid circulation.. to get similar looking arms.. Now to get to that extent I'm pretty sure its just genetics but it could potentially be something else.

Frank mcgrath is known for his ridiculous forearms though..

[–]asanttu 51 points52 points ago

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Start working out they said, you will get fit they said

[–]TinyTimmyTokyo 140 points141 points ago

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Is that Madonna?

[–]KnuckleDraggingGamer 191 points192 points ago

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People make fun of her, but I think she looks great after her undead pact with the Prince of Darkness that has turned her into a lich! :D That kind of eternal commitment is really paying off for her.

I think its kind of sad though. Even though she sold her soul for success, she is still having trouble remaining competitive with younger females in the biz. But still, kudos for her out of the box thinking and can do attitude! :)

[–]Gorillaz_Noodle 36 points37 points ago

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Are you the necrophelliac who did the AMA yesterday?

[–]AgreesWithIdiots 27 points28 points ago

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Wait, someone actually had that AMA? Where can I find it?

[–]battle_hardened 29 points30 points ago

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As requested,AMA

[–]albert0kn0x 5 points6 points ago

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i don't even..... what.

[–]NBAallstar 8 points9 points ago

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That was a pretty interesting read, but really he was just a dog fucker.

[–]albert0kn0x 26 points27 points ago

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He was just a dogfucker

I'll take "Things you'll only hear on the internet" for 400 Alex.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]helgaofthenorth 10 points11 points ago

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It's bad form to be a bitch. I think more people would still like her if she wasn't so bitter and grasping about her fame. It is sad, and it must be difficult for her, but she could be more graceful about the whole "aging pop star" thing.

[–]DifferentOpinion1 9 points10 points ago

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People are strange. Madonna is worth well over $100MM. At that point, why do you have to keep "trying?" Just enjoy yourself.

[–]KnuckleDraggingGamer 10 points11 points ago

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Well...she was pretty aggressive in the first place to obtain the success she did. She was always kind of bitter, and even though she won in a way, she is still bitter. Its interesting to see really. She was never graceful, though, and I am not surprised she is trying to compete with women that are easily 30 years her junior.

Not that her age should hold her back. She is still a competent musician and an excellent singer. But I think it is disturbing to watch her try to keep her...sexual edge in the face of...getting older.

And I was seriously worried that she was a lich now. O_O (j/k...mostly)

[–]UnashamedPacifist 1 point2 points ago

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Cher and Tina Turner are doing it right.

[–]Koolaidstory 24 points25 points ago

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proven to be fake

[–]Joe_Kehr 6 points7 points ago

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No, that's Skeletor.

[–]dcss 4 points5 points ago

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wtf...

[–]ImADouchebag 10 points11 points ago

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[–]castlehassle 17 points18 points ago

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That's a pretty nice dick aside from the odd shape.

[–]Awesome_Oil_Paint 470 points471 points ago

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[–]Kalimyre 354 points355 points ago

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I think the best part of that is the "Roids" in the link.

[–]ftc08 150 points151 points ago

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It's not, they just made the link look like it.

http://i.imgur.com/mango.jpg

[–]oed706 115 points116 points ago

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[–]somerandomguy255 61 points62 points ago

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Pretty much what awesome_oil_paint did here.

http://imgur.com/w1Z4Rd.jpg

[–]oed706 47 points48 points ago

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Oh now I get it. If people don't:

[imgur link] (non imgur url)

[–]ForgettableUsername 42 points43 points ago

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There's actually a wikipedia article on this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reddit_URL_Spoofing

[–]oed706 17 points18 points ago

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That's actually a really good article. More people should read it.

[–]TheDroopy 34 points35 points ago

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[–]Yarumasi 33 points34 points ago

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Girl look at that body

[–]somerandomguy255 16 points17 points ago

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He made it look like that, it links to deviantart

[–]DMCoolen 1 point2 points ago

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His arm looks like Ryu's infected arm in Ninja Gaiden 3!!!!

[–]Jaegrqualm 14 points15 points ago

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Sneaky bastard

[–]tossn00b 2 points3 points ago

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Devious, masking the deviantart link as an imgur link.

[–]maip23 8 points9 points ago

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[–]iAMtheTROUBLEDone 129 points130 points ago

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Hypertrophy of the veins; Either has dangerously low blood pressure and calls for the need of steroid derivative hormones or has had a previous treatment and reacted to (a) drug(s) and or hormone(s) and their reaction was an impressive, yet somewhat dangerous dilation in their veins.

[–]systmshk 77 points78 points ago

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Your diagnosis doesn't account for the extensive muscular development in the forearm region and the bicep as visible in the picture. Spend some time in a bodybuilding gym and you will learn to distinguish between vascular hypertrophy and muscle pump.

[–]POULTRY_PLACENTA 16 points17 points ago

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[–]qda 15 points16 points ago

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LOVE

[–]daswickerman 9 points10 points ago

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BUT IT'S OVER NOW

[–]iAMtheTROUBLEDone 1 point2 points ago

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True; I meant that the vein has increased diameter, immensely. Hypertrophy indicated muscle increasing in size. Sorry about that!

[–]DidNotGetTheMemo 13 points14 points ago

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He probably did a belt around his upper arm and flexed his muscles for a minute. It will look like that... If you're jacked.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points ago

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Still waiting on that (b) part there buddy. Or are you just gona keep us all in suspense?

[–]Bitter_Idealist 36 points37 points ago

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No, they meant either a drug or drugs. Not a list.

[–]MustachioBashio 5 points6 points ago

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sigh

[–]doctor_professor_cox 18 points19 points ago

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Girl look at that body.

[–]anotherDocObVious 1 point2 points ago

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Why dangerous??

[–]Sallymander 26 points27 points ago

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You have to have a certain level of blood pressure to stay alive. If the pressure gets to low the blood doesn't keep flowing and starts to clot causing problem ranging to loss of limbs to death.

... of course I'm using my extensive medical knowledge from watching medical dramas such as House over the years so I can be full of shit.

[–]hokiepride 1 point2 points ago

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Thanks for the explanation!

[–]antaryon 1 point2 points ago

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I can't believe I had to scroll down so much for a decent explanation of what that was. #firstworldproblems

[–]guntfuddler 7 points8 points ago

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Would you like some arm with your veins?

[–]dmz5e 4 points5 points ago

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Popeye?

[–]Masa-Miyuko7702 7 points8 points ago

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Becoming a charger, I see.

[–]MrTumbleweed 7 points8 points ago

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What happened? Is this a disease or a physiological problem?

[–]99Faces 20 points21 points ago

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I think its mostly psychological

[–]SecretAg3nt 2 points3 points ago

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He's a bodybuilder

[–]Joe_Kehr 9 points10 points ago

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Goku, three episodes after he started powering up.

[–]WaysToLove666 24 points25 points ago

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[–]Muskelchock 21 points22 points ago

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Wonder how his dick looks like

[–]bwill323 43 points44 points ago

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!

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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Well that was a gamble.

[–]doomchild 4 points5 points ago

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Really? Do you really?

[–]EminGH 2 points3 points ago

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Normal, considering he does not lift weights with his dick.

[–]FakeScientificStory 93 points94 points ago

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This is a known problem in the weightlifting community. So, during regular weightlifting (i.e. normal), your veins accumulate protein because your muscles are ripped/torn when you work out. Sometimes, similar to heart disease, proteins can polymerize and cause plaques. This leads to what you see here. The plaques have formed inside the veins and lead to vasodilation. His blood pressure must be through the roof, and has caused inflammation of the forearm muscles as you see.

[–]lethal_weapon_five 94 points95 points ago

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plaque would actually prevent vasodil........ i see your user name now.. ಠ_ಠ

[–]MagicScrewdriver 27 points28 points ago

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it sounded so real!

[–]Champalamp 1 point2 points ago

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i almost had an excuse to stop going to the gym

[–]richvarney 13 points14 points ago

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Just... So clever

[–]cartermnyc 23 points24 points ago

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every. fucking. time.

[–]chickemnigfops 2 points3 points ago

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I believed you. Then I read the comments.

[–]FakeScientificStory 2 points3 points ago

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Read my previous comment on the Redding-Drummond effect. This will explain everything.

[–]Tonyfreeholy 5 points6 points ago

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[–]DocEmmettBrown88 7 points8 points ago

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"It's not a toomah!"

[–]rageth 2 points3 points ago

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His arm looks like a dick.

[–]KosstAmojan 2 points3 points ago

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Good lord! This man should get himself to the nearest hospital immediately and let every damn medical student practice blood draws and IVs on him! I would've (and my 1st few patients too)loved to have had someone like this!

[–]foodpornclub 2 points3 points ago

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too much Bane poison.

[–]WhaleProbe 2 points3 points ago

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This bodybuilder's name is Frank McGrath. You can see his signature bicep vein in many of his photos. http://img442.imageshack.us/img442/5199/67ny2.jpg

[–]julywildcat 2 points3 points ago

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Looks like you found Popeye!

[–]witty_account_name 2 points3 points ago

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He just needs to start using heroin and they'll deflate really nicely

[–]mikele_ro 1 point2 points ago

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the hulk is real

[–]joelnet 1 point2 points ago

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Anyone have any more pics of this guy?

[–]Miseducated 1 point2 points ago

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Looks like a deflated Popeye balloon.

[–]ElricG 1 point2 points ago

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You mirin?

[–]ghostly1001 1 point2 points ago

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How to tell if you masturbated way too much.

[–]acat350 1 point2 points ago

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Anyone else think of the charger from L4D

[–]Veritas_LiberabitVos 1 point2 points ago

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I really want to know what caused this.....for science, no joke.

[–]kpthunder 1 point2 points ago

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Reminds me of this guy.

[–]IRSmurf 1 point2 points ago

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This is obviously Forever Alone.

[–]scrtagent101 1 point2 points ago

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Masturbation - you're doing it too much.

[–]gabbagabba777 1 point2 points ago

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Is anyone else wondering what the fuck is wrong with this person?

[–]Mr_Moogles 1 point2 points ago

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Someone get Fawkes a Gatling Laser!

[–]skwishems 1 point2 points ago

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BANE

[–]Fists_of_Fury 1 point2 points ago

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It's a treasure map.

[–]EndGame8968 1 point2 points ago

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It's all good until he nicks his arm and bleeds out.

[–]Roomy 1 point2 points ago

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That's what women REALLY love. A VASCULAR man. Come and see how VASCULAR I am.

Oh god, I gagged a little bit looking at this.

[–]NootnamedLoL 1 point2 points ago

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It looks like he's being touched by Rogue from X-Men.

[–]DerpVonGroove 1 point2 points ago

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[–]MMMREESESCUPS 1 point2 points ago

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Why are those snakes wrapped around that poor man's arm?

[–]JarasM 1 point2 points ago

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Just some Kaio-ken, nothing to see here.

[–]qu1ckbeam 1 point2 points ago

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Reminds me of veiny dog.

[–]fman5k 1 point2 points ago

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Plasmids and you!

[–]mothercowa 1 point2 points ago

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Tank!

[–]Watsons 1 point2 points ago

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A phlebotomists dream.

[–]TheRookIsGod 1 point2 points ago

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fuark mirin' his vascularity

[–]-TheBender- 1 point2 points ago

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Reminded me of the "Murderin' Arm". http://i.imgur.com/2HR4b.jpg

[–]progfan727 1 point2 points ago

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That is the result of years of nonstop fapping.

[–]aikomishimatsu 1 point2 points ago

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I want to pop one.

[–]kip622 1 point2 points ago

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All I can think of is this

[–]boomer0913 1 point2 points ago

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Someone just discovered Internet porn!!!!!

[–]alliace 1 point2 points ago

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Looks like Bane's on the loose again

[–]ObsceneAct 1 point2 points ago

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Chronic Masturbator of the year!

[–]Net_Bastard 1 point2 points ago

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If they have to amputate then send me the arm. I want to bake it, bread it, and eat it.

[–]Vivrenoctem 1 point2 points ago*

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I wish I had veins like that. I have an implant that is basically a permanent IV because even the anesthesiologist can't find veins on me.