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1016
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Go kayaking they said. It'll be fun they said. (imgur.com)

submitted ago by Questmuncher332

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[–]Deactivation 100 points101 points ago

I went kayaking. Once. I was off Maui and I would say a good 10 minutes off the shore when I looked down and looking back up at me is the eye of a humpback whale. Never again.

[–]BarneysPosse 38 points39 points ago

That's BADASS.

[–]ArtistiqueInk 29 points30 points ago

I would be so scared and yet so happy to be close to one of them that I probably wouldn't notice for several days that the whale actually swallowed me whole.

[–]My_Revelation 9 points10 points ago*

You know, the first time I read that I read the whole swallowed me whale. I lol'd.

Edit; Last night I was - 5 : D

[–]bozzwtf 8 points9 points ago

I hate when people downvote dyslexia sympathizers. FEEL THAT KNOW

[–]My_Revelation -1 points0 points ago*

:( bullies.

[–]yosem1te 8 points9 points ago

Man I would go out every day trying to get near it again. That's AWESOME!

[–]HZVi 3 points4 points ago

I would have followed that whale and then spent the rest of my vacation trying to go back out and find it again. That sounds so cool. I don't understand you. Not one bit.

[–]NEET9 9 points10 points ago

Maybe this will clear things up

[–]Deactivation 3 points4 points ago

I think a lot of people underestimate just how large whales actually are. Being in a small kayak with something so powerful underneath you is really scary.

[–]HZVi 1 point2 points ago

I can understand the fear, and I think I would have some initially, but I really do love big sea animals. I'm moderately experienced when it comes to the ocean; I have free-dived with sharks and all that jazz. I think it would be adrenaline pumping, but it would also be magnificent and humbling.

[–]xWhackoJacko 37 points38 points ago

I'm staying on dry land. Forever.

[–]NeuroticsNotebook 41 points42 points ago

Remember to use the peep hole

[–]p8ssword 5 points6 points ago

Or at least don't answer for a candygram.

[–]TooSmooth 16 points17 points ago

Curse ye landlubber

[–]01110101Qu -2 points-1 points ago

Did you steal the elephant bones?

[–]pizzaolives 261 points262 points ago

http://i.imgur.com/7CgFZ.jpg

[–]h2sbacteria 7 points8 points ago

Nice try Mr. Shark.

[–]pizzaolives 28 points29 points ago

http://i.qkme.me/36knmh.jpg

[–]themythicalpelican 43 points44 points ago

I think this might be the best thing on the internet right now.

[–]Apostolate 162 points163 points ago

oh really?

[–]JazzlasterBoris 18 points19 points ago

Nobody show this to the Cheat.

[–]ScreamingAloudInside 8 points9 points ago

Everything is always worse with bears

[–]SonVolt 19 points20 points ago

BEARS.

[–]HitMePat 5 points6 points ago

Not even once

[–]Senor_Gnomo 1 point2 points ago

that's a title that will last long

[–]zscuro 69 points70 points ago

That's not photoshop. It's in South Africa - not Seal Island, but whatever town that is that all the guys who study Great White Sharks go to. I remember seeing actual video footage of this during Shark Week. I think that's Chris Fallows in the kayak.

Here's a different link to the pic. http://mydesultoryblog.com/2008/03/great-white-shark-following-kayak-poster/

[–]fandacious 35 points36 points ago

Yup. I live ~5km from the beach where this was taken. I don't swim in the sea. Ever

[–]Nuggetized 11 points12 points ago

Is the water clear enough to see danger from further away? Do people avoid swimming because of predators like this?

[–]leroideschoux 15 points16 points ago

It's probably clear enough that you would see your death coming, I wouldn't try and outswim a shark.

[–]BlackMarsh 5 points6 points ago

Awe Cape Town.

[–]fandacious 2 points3 points ago

Hosh tokolosh

[–]LeSouthAfricanSpy 2 points3 points ago

Spent a while in Durban expecting the beaches to be better than Cape Town, still needed balls of steel to go swimming. I feel you.

[–]watkykjy420 3 points4 points ago

Wat pomp? , I understand the reluctance to get in the water. If you ever get to J-bay the waves are great but you need to dodge the sharks or punch them if they get close and you are super crazy like my friends that surf there.

[–]Proposition_Joe 84 points85 points ago

After reading that, I'm surprised that the kayak stayed afloat, given the weight of that dude's enormous balls.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

Probably added to the buoyancy.

[–]TrankaTom 5 points6 points ago

Balls that huge are too dense to float.

[–]KeepF-ingThatChicken 11 points12 points ago

TIL size = density.

[–]TrankaTom 5 points6 points ago

Yep first law of theoretical ball science: Testicle size is directly proportional to it's density.

[–]moped_outlaw 2 points3 points ago

also things that are more dense float better than things that are less dense

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points ago

Apparently it is pretty common

[–]zscuro 0 points1 point ago

Not the best shop, but I sure as hell laughed. Have an upvote.

[–]Deadnettle 5 points6 points ago

Although we had extensively tested the sharks’ reactions to an empty kayak and had observed no signs of aggression, this gave us little comfort as we eyed a great white heading straight for us, albeit slowly. Just a metre or so from the craft it veered off, circled and slowly approached from behind. It did this several times, occasionally lifting its head out of the water to get a better look. Then it lost interest, and as it continued on its way we were able to follow a short distance behind. Once we’d come to terms with having nothing between ourselves and a four-metre shark except a thin layer of plastic, our kayak made an ideal research platform for observing great white behaviour in shallow water.

More like an ideal feeding platform as far as I'm concerned

[–]yosem1te 1 point2 points ago

Except the shark didn't care about eating them.

[–]hinduguru 5 points6 points ago

did they died?

[–]zscuro 1 point2 points ago

wut

[–]Anonymo 8 points9 points ago

did they died?

[–]wcbdfy 0 points1 point ago

This dude should do an AMA

[–]macladyfine -1 points0 points ago

Its not chris- but it does look like false bay

[–]yukel -1 points0 points ago

Mosselbaai - spent a summer over there

[–]scuba21 125 points126 points ago

As someone who worked for years with sharks (hand feeding nurse sharks underwater in particular, and playing with the black tip reef sharks) I can honestly say they are one of the best animals I've ever worked with. You always know where you sit with a shark, they don't do anything randomly. They let you know the score at all times. Green sea turtles on the other hand can be giant dicks.

[–]Athene_Wins 52 points53 points ago

lol all turtle-things are dicks. So many gifs of them sneaking up on pets and biting them for no reason

[–]scoops22 32 points33 points ago

Usually in the balls.

[–]afkobaya 51 points52 points ago

Yeah it's such a dick move when i'm just chillin like a villain being a pet when all of a sudden some Ed Hardy wearing turtle comes and bites my balls

[–]eugenesbluegenes 4 points5 points ago

I'm not sure what you did there, but I think I like it.

[–]whitehat2k9 0 points1 point ago

Not if you're neutered!

[–]scuba21 31 points32 points ago

Or in my case, a 250 lb turtle biting me in the ass underwater... jerk.

[–]Emilyzvlogz 6 points7 points ago

im sorry but i laughed so hard after reading that. XD

[–]SaxyTimeReloaded 1 point2 points ago

IAMA.

[–]ILL_Show_Myself_Out 8 points9 points ago

I like turtles!

[–]krisfade 8 points9 points ago

I once had a bottle-nosed turtle. Shit made my room smell like the outhouses in South Africa.

[–]watkykjy420 -1 points0 points ago

Have you really smelled the out houses in S.A. ? and where in S.A. ? The cape, soweto, durban, springbok its a large country.

[–]krisfade 5 points6 points ago

Yes. Mostly because I'm doing dental work in the cape and other areas. Kids and men get dental work for free. Women....blowjobs for everyone.

[–]Pays4Porn 2 points3 points ago

I need to hear more about the blow jobs.

[–]krisfade 2 points3 points ago

ah yes...well many of the men needed extra help around the villages, as the men worked hard long hours the women would blow cool air on their faces. hence the blowjobs

[–]watkykjy420 2 points3 points ago

Ok you know then. Its been 8 years since I've been back to visit relatives. South Africa is so beautiful and crazy I love it! You have made me buy a ticket, just Now, I go back on the 4th of june for 1 month, Thanks!

[–]krisfade 5 points6 points ago

You are very welcome. Enjoy your trip.

[–]watkykjy420 3 points4 points ago

I will I have lots of family to see all over SA ,so fun will be had. Have you been up table top mountain? The view is beautiful at night.

[–]krisfade 2 points3 points ago

No I haven't. I'll have to check it out next time im over there.

[–]watkykjy420 2 points3 points ago

You really should be careful at night if you are a rich white guy, have some locals take you and all is good.

[–]ILL_Show_Myself_Out 14 points15 points ago

I guess you live every week like its shark week.

[–]krallice 8 points9 points ago

You should do an AMA

[–]scuba21 2 points3 points ago

Well, I was only a maintenance diver at West Edmonton Mall, I'm sure people do cooler AMAs than that.

[–]krallice 3 points4 points ago

I sincerely doubt anyone's done a maintenance-diver-who-deals-with-sharks AMA. That sounds pretty interesting to me.

[–]scuba21 3 points4 points ago

Well, I suppose I did dive with a lot of stuff, including those submarines for quite a few years before heading off a couple of months ago. Wow, like 8 years now that I think about it, jeez....

[–]hungry138imp 1 point2 points ago

yeah! do one, seriously would be cool

[–]scuba21 1 point2 points ago

I'm not even sure how to actually.

[–]gaso 0 points1 point ago

Well, create a self-post (after reading the sidebar at /r/IAmA/ for pointers and the rules).

Make the title interesting and descriptive, it's the only thing you won't be able to update as the AMA progresses.

Make sure you create it at a point in time you'll be able to spend a few hours checking in on it. Nobody likes it when you create an AMA and then go on a six hour hiatus.

Reply in detail to the questions asked, and if you have a very good exchange, summarize it and update your original post with a summary and link.

That should be a fairly solid start, but I'm likely overlooking something.

[–]scuba21 2 points3 points ago

Well in that case. For anyone interested in the times and adventures of a scuba diver at West Edmonton Mall, I'll put one up tomorrow for you.

[–]hungry138imp 0 points1 point ago

how to make a post? just go to /r/all, go to the side and it'll say something about a new post, click that, write your ama title, make it a text thing, explain whatever, put the ama subreddit in where it asks, then voila :D

[–]AmyDeadhouse 12 points13 points ago

Nurse sharks are fairly docile as far as sharks go. I think theres a huge difference in the demeanor and actions between a nurse shark and say a Mako.

[–]NurRauch 5 points6 points ago

Or a Tiger shark or Great White. Namely, that those kinds of sharks will eventually attempt to eat you.

[–]yosem1te 2 points3 points ago*

What does falling out of bed, roller coasters, texting, deer, hot dogs, lightning, cows, vending machines, coconuts, obesity, hippos and autorotic asphyxiation have in common?

They're all more likely to kill you than a shark.

Edit: They also kill more people every year than sharks do.

[–]NurRauch 11 points12 points ago

Okay? Hand-feeding sharks would tend to up your chances of getting hurt by the shark. Especially when, as I said, you work with something like a tiger shark instead of nursing sharks.

[–]yosem1te 2 points3 points ago

nurse sharks*

I've worked with sharks for about 3 years now too and yes I would say that it would be more dangerous to hand-feed a tiger shark, but if you're hand feeding a tiger shark without the proper protective gear (shark suits) would be just plain stupid.

[–]Strangely_Calm 3 points4 points ago

Shark suits dont work with sharks bigger than 2m or more powerful than reefies.

Source? Ron and Valerie Taylor- The threat is not the bite, but rather the shark can easily grab you and tow you away.

[–]Katyara 5 points6 points ago

Wonderful quote from a friend:" I understand sharks, if a guy walked into my house with a speedo I would bite him too!"

On a serious note I have heard they have poor eyesight. If you look at a surfer laying on a board going for a wave from the underside it does look like a seal so they take a bite, realize the mistake and most of them go "EWW not tasty!" Makos and Tigers are wonderful garbage disposals. Almost like vultures of the water world. Kinda glad they clean up the mess the others. Always try and look from the animals point of view and wow are they graceful in the water. I love watching them cut and turn while they swim around.

[–]yosem1te 5 points6 points ago

Sharks actually have rather good eyesight, they just tend to hang out in areas where the water quality isn't optimal such as the shoreline. They might mistake you for a seal, but they don't like humans. As they can't reach out and touch you with their fins like humans or other animals can, their only way of telling what you are is by using their mouth. Most sharks get a taste of human flesh and then let go, unfortunately sometimes that taste has hit an artery or the human is far from shore, unable to get to help in time.

Still, I'd say only 5 deaths a year is pretty damn good numbers for such "horrible bloodthirsty killers."

[–]Katyara 1 point2 points ago

Oh yeah I totally don't agree with the rep they have at all. It's really misguided. I was saying most 'attacks' by them (or most animals for that matter) are an oops.

[–]Deddan 1 point2 points ago

And toasters!

[–]gistak 1 point2 points ago

That's obviously not true if you spend a lot of time feeding sharks and no time near hippos.

By your logic, you may be more likely to die of malaria than of a heart attack, but I still suggest you take it easy on the cheese if you live in the US.

[–]yosem1te 0 points1 point ago

What I'm saying is that annually only 5 people are killed by sharks. Those numbers include all those crazy people who feed and work with them for a living.

[–]OCedHrt 1 point2 points ago

You need to apply context. The likelihood of encountering a shark is factored in and needs to be removed.

[–]scuba21 0 points1 point ago

Not as much as you'd think. It's mostly noticeable in the energy you get off of them. I know that sounds weird, that's just the best way to describe it underwater. Sharks are a lot like dogs in that way, different species act differently, but they have general behaviors that link them as similar as well. That being said, some sharks are simply more aggressive than others and you have to be ready for that (or just don't get in the water in some cases).

[–]goodshotjanson 1 point2 points ago

sharks probably won't try to fuck you, at least. not without your consent. http://scienceblogs.com/observations/2011/01/reverse_bestiality_when_animal.php

[–]Strangely_Calm 1 point2 points ago

Yes because nurse sharks and black tip reef sharks are totally close to white sharks, bulls, whalers and tigers. Come to WA and dive in shark central at Ningaloo reef and you'll get a real appreciation real quick for the big boys.

P S threshers are my fave

[–]scuba21 0 points1 point ago

Love threshers, still have a soft spot for cute little bamboo sharks, not sure why though.

[–]h2sbacteria 2 points3 points ago

Tortoise and the hare... what they don't tell you is how the tortoise killed the fucking hare a week later.

[–]zanerbery 0 points1 point ago

You just go by yourself I said

[–]Katyara 0 points1 point ago

What about hammerheads? I've always liked them. What are they like?

[–]scuba21 1 point2 points ago

Scalloped are cool, but a little skittish, never worked with any larger species of hammerhead though.

[–]SantiagoAndDunbar 0 points1 point ago

thats awesome. what other kind of work do you do? i've been fascinated with sharks since i was a kid. luckily i live by the beach but i've only been able to swim with leopard sharks. first thing on my bucket list is to cage dive with the great whites

[–]marley88 7 points8 points ago

Relevant:

9 foot Great White shark circles surfer, caught on underwater HD video

[–]SaxyTimeReloaded 1 point2 points ago

DA FUQ MAN DA FUQ

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

My hands are all sweaty now

[–]MakeItFunke 21 points22 points ago*

" You're gonna need a bigger boat "

edit: now with a link

[–]vertigo1083 0 points1 point ago

If your boat is 5 feet, and the shark is 12 feet

Youre gonna have a bad time

[–]kat_burglar 0 points1 point ago

Was going to post this but you beat me to it.

[–]MakeItFunke -1 points0 points ago

even better

[–]Oakland420 5 points6 points ago

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/81397061/

Sorry about the ebaums link, but this is from home town, Panama City, Fl. The shark appears at :23

[–]Kherx 4 points5 points ago

Being close to a basking shark is a whole lot different than being close to a great white. Especially in a kayak.

[–]Grivellchick 6 points7 points ago

I actually know the person who was on the team of researchers in South Africa that were studying great white sharks (he's mentioned in the article and is currently employed by the Mike Horn Young Explorer's Program). Here's a link detailing the validity of the photograph: http://www.thomaspeschak.com/kayak-great-white-sharks-/

[–]stmlb54 2 points3 points ago

Trey snow was the guy in the kayak and Thomas peschak (sp?) took the photo. You can google "Trey snow shark" and the story will come up.

[–]aboynamedsoo 2 points3 points ago

Get the fuck out of the water they said.

[–]jas0nb 2 points3 points ago

I think this is the original picture that the "shark swimming in the streets of Puerto Rico" was shopped from. "http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/blogpost/post/hurricane-irene-photo-of-shark-swimming-in-street-is-fake/2011/08/26/gIQABHAvfJ_blog.html" The shadows and angles match up perfectly, besides for the obvious color and tint changes to match the water.

[–]Lapineygord 2 points3 points ago

I'd poop my bikini...shit.

[–]mialbowy 2 points3 points ago

"Tag, you're it!"

[–]TopShotChick 5 points6 points ago

nope

[–]Emilyzvlogz 1 point2 points ago

my reaction when i clicked: "HOLY BALLS! NOPE NOPE NOPE!" i do not like sharks. no thank you!

[–]ROFLCRISPS 1 point2 points ago

thank you for this. my fear for sharks has been solidified.

[–]Shwoodge 1 point2 points ago

read the title in Zoidbergs voice

[–]adamnyc 1 point2 points ago

That's some bad hat, Harry.

[–]chimera8990 3 points4 points ago

Kayaking in a place like that....

Totally worth being stalked by a shark

[–]jkm_Audio 1 point2 points ago

Did they remember to bring their Bat Shark Repellent?

[–]mockereo 4 points5 points ago

Holy tampering with the delinquency of minors, Batman!

[–]idi0tf0wl 2 points3 points ago

Robinisms

So stupid, yet so entertaining...

[–]Lycocles 2 points3 points ago

This freaked me out, because it's like it was lifted straight from a dream I had last night.

[–]ungulate 4 points5 points ago

You were about to eat a kayak?

[–]JoeTheDolfan 0 points1 point ago

I like sharks and have scuba-dove with them before, but GTFO GTFO!

[–]fuckinlovesdownvotes 0 points1 point ago

I have seen kayakers do this so they can hook the sharks and go for a ride. I hope those sharks take them back to all their friends.

[–]pav413 0 points1 point ago

I think that would be a good time to panic.

[–]PapauNewGuinea 0 points1 point ago

Do people kayak in oceans? I thought it was usually a river/lake thing

[–]freedomweasel 1 point2 points ago

Sea kayaking, anywhere from touristy afternoon paddles around the marshes to multi-week expeditions in the middle of nowhere. Good fun.

[–]geej 0 points1 point ago

Warcraft 2 footman voice I'd RATHER be sailing!

[–]krisp46 0 points1 point ago

Was expecting this guy: http://i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/242/190/9d6.jpg

[–]Geegasarus 0 points1 point ago

Sweet mother of god... Nooooo

[–]jegerbacon 0 points1 point ago

Looks legit

[–]HZVi 0 points1 point ago

I don't know why everyone's freaking out, the poor guy is just curious.

[–]SaxyTimeReloaded 0 points1 point ago

NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO

[–]ductaperecorder 0 points1 point ago

http://g.co/maps/7tkzs Related ^

Look at step 32

[–]tempralanomaly 0 points1 point ago

Somehow I envision the shark thinking that.

[–]princessbitchypants 0 points1 point ago

My cousin wants me to do this with her. This is exactly why I said Hells no!

[–]CeeBmata 0 points1 point ago

I've read this article. The man took care of the shark when it was young and now it follows him when he kayaks. Great photo of his life's work.

[–]Funnyguy17 0 points1 point ago

Bring a 44 magnum they said....

[–]Pretty_Boy_Floyd 0 points1 point ago

I just shit my pants.

[–]fizikz3 0 points1 point ago

Who is taking a picture... or rather, from where are they taking it? It looks rather high up...so probably a large boat? given the angle he can't be that far from it either.

[–]LucifersCounsel 0 points1 point ago

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/81397061/

[–]dasdumdum 0 points1 point ago

Man for dinner. Kayak to floss. Genius marketing!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

That does look a bit fun.

[–]ivanandtheterribles 0 points1 point ago

DAMN NATURE, YOU SCARY!

[–]interbasting 0 points1 point ago

NOPE

[–]chunkypuddles 0 points1 point ago

I just put my feet up on my bed... O.O...

[–]Jorge1870 -2 points-1 points ago

Hey, that's me on the picture. Where you got this from??

[–]moonski -2 points-1 points ago

this is one of the most famous photographs around...

yet reddit stlll finds it new

i don't even

[–]SirThomasFraterson -1 points0 points ago

This picture is actually from a news story. He saved the shark from a fishing net and it follows him around now. He can even pet it.

[–]rjbiscuit 0 points1 point ago

False

[–]SirThomasFraterson 0 points1 point ago

Sorry, I just went to look it up too and they said my comment was a hoax years ago. This is one of the pictures they used. Thanks for the link too.

[–]agsinger -2 points-1 points ago

Image is a repost but at least your headline is clever.

[–]mc_treble -2 points-1 points ago

I say Nay Nay!

[–]roflswithcopters -2 points-1 points ago

They say it be like it is, but it don't.

[–]TheLoneWander101 -5 points-4 points ago

so fake

[–]WheeStar 0 points1 point ago

So dumb

[–]TheLoneWander101 0 points1 point ago

clever

[–]LucifersCounsel 0 points1 point ago

45 minutes before this comment, Oakland420 posted this link:

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/81397061/

Scan the comments before you reply. You're less likely to come off looking like a fool.

[–]TheLoneWander101 0 points1 point ago

yeah but you'll still be a douche no matter how it looks

[–]zmurfette -3 points-2 points ago

Looks like a plane shadow.

[–]werno -4 points-3 points ago

This is what you get for kayaking. Row.

[–]freedomweasel 0 points1 point ago

Pro-tip: You paddle a kayak.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]SantiagoAndDunbar 0 points1 point ago

thats definitely not a nurse shark... but you are correct when saying nurse sharks arent that harmful

[–]Lurker4years -5 points-4 points ago

The thing is, (s)he does not like doing any paddling at all. . . . ho hum, what a beautiful day, think I'll just stop here and enjoy the view. :)

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]freedomweasel 1 point2 points ago

Not a shop.

Found a link for ya.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]freedomweasel 0 points1 point ago

When this photograph was first published in Africa Geographic, BBC Wildlife and later in Paris Match and the Daily Mail (London) it resulted in a flurry of e-mails, phone calls and letters from around the world asking if the image was a fake. The image became the most talked about of shark photograph ever.

WHITE SHARK KAYAK POSTERS - CLICK HERE

The photograph is real, no photoshop, no digital manipulation, no nothing, in fact it was shot on slide film Fuji Provia 100 using a Nikon F5 Camera and 17-35 mm lens. For those conspiracy fans who still doubt its authenticity please read how I took the photograph.

To capture this image I tied myself to the tower of the research boat Lamnidae and leaned into the void, precariously hanging over the ocean while waiting patiently for a white shark to come along. I wanted to shot a photograph that would tell the story of our research efforts to track white sharks using kayaks. When the first shark of the day came across our sea kayak it dove to the seabed and inspected it from below. I quickly trained my camera on the dark shadow which slowly transformed from diffuse shape into the sleek outline of a large great white. When the shark’s dorsal fin broke the surface I thought I had the shot, but hesitated a fraction of a second and was rewarded with marine biologist Trey Snow in the kayak turning around to look behind him. I pressed the shutter and the rest was history. Throughout the day I shot many more images, most showing the kayak following the shark, but all lacked the power of that first image of the great white tracking the kayak.

better quality image

If you don't believe it's real that's your prerogative. I'm fairly sure it won an award or two though. There are also a few more pictures of the same event.

[–]L3ftyrocks89 -2 points-1 points ago

Fuck. That.

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