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1203
1204

My Facebook news feed now that all my friends are having kids... (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by MofoJack

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[–]smootie 47 points48 points ago

It wouldn't be so bad if my friends' babies weren't so ugly.

[–]Brocktoon_in_a_jar 27 points28 points ago

all babies are ugly until around age 18

[–]acg706 5 points6 points ago

Sometimes even longer.

[–]NickTM 3 points4 points ago

Seriously. I don't know why people think babies look nice. If I knew someone with a head that is as wide as their shoulders, I doubt I'd consider them nice-looking.

[–]smithers85 1 point2 points ago

It's hard to believe she's already 18

[–]SecretBlogon 3 points4 points ago

They look like tiny pudgy balls glued together with mucus and drool.

Every time someone shows me their baby, I stand there and smile and nod while everyone else coos at how cute they are. I don't get it. It's fucking ugly.

[–]RoflStomper 0 points1 point ago

They're doing the same thing. If you don't, they won't coo over your kid when you show them pictures, and then we're back to the emperor not wearing any clothes

[–]Chrimbus_special 80 points81 points ago

What's even worse is the people that create Facebook profiles for their UNBORN baby....."Only three more weeks til I meet mommy and daddy! I hope they're cool!"...STFU

[–]ffffffpony 33 points34 points ago

http://www.lamebook.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/unborn-updates.png

[–]Cariban 1 point2 points ago

Lol, this is fake right? Right? Please let this be fake.

[–]NickTM 8 points9 points ago

I hope it is real, just to see your mind slowly implode for all reddit to see.

[–]beepbeepimajeep_ 0 points1 point ago

Stupid people - Stupid people everywhere.

[–]NiceGuysFinishLast 10 points11 points ago

I'm proud to say I don't know anyone who has done this.

[–]Tennessean 3 points4 points ago

I don't mind the kid stuff, but I know someone that did the unborn bullshit. Guess who got their friend request "ignored?"

[–]Ixidane 5 points6 points ago

ಠ_ಠ

[–]krisbee 4 points5 points ago

Completely agreed. I am on Facebook at this point solely so that I can keep getting news of my friends' children (I moved thousands of miles away), but I am so not interested in your fetus.

Also, fun(?) fact: Approximately 15% of pregnancies in America end in miscarriage.

[–]Bored_At_Night -1 points0 points ago

Approximately 15% of pregnancies in America end in miscarriage.

Source?

Also, relevance that the study takes place in America as opposed to other first world countries?

[–]krisbee 2 points3 points ago

Source?

http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancycomplications/miscarriage.html Scroll down to "What are the chances of having a miscarriage?"
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/miscarriage/DS01105

Among many others.

[–]TemperMental 1 point2 points ago

I need more upvotes to give this, why can I only upvote once damnit?!

[–]czarchastic 1 point2 points ago

This instantly makes you an uncool parent

[–]MisterDonkey 0 points1 point ago

Right on.

[–]KevinBaconAndEggs 81 points82 points ago

The worst are the people (mostly women) who post pictures of other people's kids.

[–]Galappa 42 points43 points ago

Yes. Makes it look like I'm friends with a bunch of babies.

[–]vedder10 38 points39 points ago

It appears that I am friends with over 100 babies on FB. Why isn't there just a babybook for babies to share their pics with each other? I don't give a shit what some one year old shat today.

[–]drockers 13 points14 points ago*

^ new billion-fucking-dollar idea right there.

Edit: Accidentally a word.

[–]neuter 0 points1 point ago

What does having intercourse with billion have to do with Babyboo.. oh. OHHHHHHH.

[–]SpaceUnicorn 4 points5 points ago

I suppose you can always unsubscribe from their statuses, and stay friends with them. The problem is, however, is that you'll only have maybe 3-4 people remaining in your news feed.

[–]jjordan47 16 points17 points ago

Entire facebook feed EES BABIES.

load more comments (1 reply)

    [–]Arduinna 5 points6 points ago

    Or of themselves with other peoples' kids- so you see this photo of someone you haven't talked to in forever holding an infant with a caption like, "My perfect little angel!" and you wonder when the hell they got knocked up. (And if you're like me, you see photos of people from hs that you didn't like that have the infant and you simply nod and say, "saw that coming.") Then you find out that the baby is their little cousin or something. (And are thus disappointed if given the aforementioned scenario.)

    [–]NickTM 1 point2 points ago

    Or, even worse, put their profile picture as their kid. Only marginally better than putting it as their car or their dog.

    [–]Bezzie 1 point2 points ago

    I posted pictures of my son from the moments after he was born just to quickly show my family...but I don't spam FB with it. I think that's appropriate.

    [–]AtTheLeftThere -4 points-3 points ago

    Women crave attention, and by having a baby they can get away with being the center of it. Nobody is going to talk shit to a pregnant girl or new mom on Facebook, unless they're asking to be de-friended and assaulted by about two-dozen friends and family members first. Women are total narcissists. This is their excuse. Much like a period is their excuse to be a total cunt.

    See you at the bottom of the thread!

    [–]NickTM 0 points1 point ago

    Your forecasting of your karma is directly proportional to your misogyny, it seems.

    [–]bmbp 18 points19 points ago

    Welcome to your 30s.

    Doubly awesome if you haven't got any and continue the bachelor(ette) lifestyle.

    Half the time I don't know who my friends are in their posts because they've got their children's photos in there. I don't care what your beautiful snowflake looks like, I want to see if you've got your hair or got fat, damn it.

    [–]imherefortheaww 4 points5 points ago

    30s? More like welcome to high school. I'm one of the only people from my HS group of friends/acquaintances who didnt have at least one or two kids by age 19

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

    Sounds like the hick school I used to go to. Most of my old friends got preggers, occasionally got married, and/or are currently living the single mom life. Heck, my redneck cousin, who is too young to buy alcohol, already has had a miscarriage (probably from drinking, ironically).

    [–]phantomupvote 12 points13 points ago

    My facebook feed has pics of real babies and ones like this: http://imgur.com/5EhSa

    [–]jediwizardrobot 16 points17 points ago

    I totally get this. 10 years ago I was all about this. But now that I have a kid, I can't help but post things about him. It's a great way for many people who actually do want to see his photos and videos to access them at their leisure. However, I also still hate the parents who post things about their kids like 'eating at mcdonalds with aiden, he loves fries!!' Some people let 'parent' become their only identity, and that's really boring.

    [–]44oranges 1 point2 points ago

    i totally agree with your second point; its frustrating to watch this happen to friends/family as well

    [–]atheist4jesus 12 points13 points ago

    The worst part of turning 16 in Alabama.

    [–]paveln 0 points1 point ago

    Your siblings are constantly posting pictures of your kids?

    [–]atheist4jesus 0 points1 point ago

    Haha no, just your mom.

    [–]WisekillyWabbit 15 points16 points ago

    I've used this as a disclaimer: David Cross, "Half of my friends have kids."

    The good news, didn't get defriended too much.

    [–]haneef81 10 points11 points ago

    "Raising kids isn't hard... I'll tell you what hard is, try talking your girlfriend into her third consecutive abortion." Oh lordy haha.

    [–]newtraditionalists 10 points11 points ago

    It's the most frightening thing to see some of the stupidest people I have ever known reproducing.

    [–]sgtpppr 48 points49 points ago

    Scumbag Facebook Misanthrope

    Chooses to follow the lives of "friends".

    Complains about having to see the lives of "friends".

    [–]PoopyMcfartface 7 points8 points ago

    I don't think showing me a picture of your baby every (couple) day(s) qualifies as "seeing their lives". It's not about them showing pictures, that's fine, it's the abundance of them.

    [–]sgtpppr 1 point2 points ago

    It's a tough life; no doubt.

    [–]XenoX101 3 points4 points ago*

    This is a really big and short-sighted simplification since it's really just one particular aspect of his Facebook experience that he is unhappy with. To show how silly this is replace both "lives of friends" and "facebook" with "movies", and 'follow' with 'watch' for simplicity (both are pursuing actions so I think this is fair). We then have..

    Scumbag Movie Misanthrope

    Chooses to watch movies

    Complains about having to watch movies

    And this would apply for any bad movie he watches (most likely unknowingly) and complains about watching, in the same way the original can be applied to following any bad aspect of the lives of friends. The sentiment is fair that when you're taking someone you ought to take them for all of who they are, but that doesn't make his complaint about any particular negative aspect any less valid.

    [–]MsOhHai 1 point2 points ago

    Wrong. It would be like watching multiple movies by the same director and complaining about it, knowing they're just going to pump out the same shit. Come on.

    [–]XenoX101 -1 points0 points ago

    That's not true, good directors make the occasional bad movie all the time, and just because I choose to like a director does not mean at all that I have to like every movie they make, since it is not always as you put it 'the same shit' and even when it is it can still be unappealing. For instance I might have enjoyed Pulp Fiction by Quentin Tarantino, but taken much less of a fancy to his newer film Kill Bill. Or for an even stronger example we can look at the infamy of movie sequels despite being by the same director in the same theme (they are quite literally 'the same shit'), I might have liked The Matrix but like most others had less appreciation for the sequels.

    [–]sgtpppr -1 points0 points ago

    Seriously? I spent 5 seconds writing a stupid joke about a retarded topic on a thread completely filled with 15 year olds talking about how lame babies are, but feel free to do a deep analysis.

    [–]XenoX101 -1 points0 points ago

    Well to me it loses its comedic value when it's wrong but anyway.

    [–]greekish -5 points-4 points ago

    When you have kids, that becomes your life. And if you're not a selfish shitball - they're awesome.

    [–]onloanfromgod 19 points20 points ago

    incidentally, most kids are usually selfish shitballs.

    [–]krisbee 7 points8 points ago

    incidentally, kids are selfish shitballs.

    FTFY.

    And no, I don't hate kids; I've just spent enough time around enough of them to have no illusions.

    [–]DestroyerOfWombs 44 points45 points ago

    To you.

    [–]strifeblood 1 point2 points ago

    Ah, I do understand how you would perceive kids as not awesome Mr. DestroyerOfWombs.

    [–]DestroyerOfWombs 18 points19 points ago

    Everybody thinks kids are awesome. The point you people miss is that everything things their own kids are awesome. And everyone thinks that because they are enamored with everything their own kids do, that everyone else is too. I assure you, most people don't look at the 4 pictures a week captioned with "look how cute when sleeping aw!" and respond as enthusiastically as you do.

    Your kids are special to you. Thats cool. They are just one of many to everyone else. Is that really so harsh a reality check?

    [–]Silix 2 points3 points ago

    The point you are making can be said of all life experiences.

    Bungie jumping? Yea it's awesome to you. But millions of people do it every year, why bother posting.

    Oh this fancy food? It's not like it's the only one made in the entire history of mankind. The restaurant serves the same food tomorrow. Why bother posting.

    Oh you have a kid. Well big news everyone has kids I've seen millions. Why bother posting.

    People are sharing their life experiences. They are doing it in social networks as they do it in real life. You start with: "oh I was doing <mountain bike riding> over the weekend". Your friend goes either: "Interesting, tell me more", or "No, a million people does that every day - lets talk about something else". At least on Facebook if you didn't want to share in this life experience you can ignore it and move on without offending your friend.

    Look, if you want to share in the life experience and perhaps understand a bit more about it, you can comment and join in. If you don't care about this particular life experience, you can just ignore it and change the topic.

    People have been doing this forever. It's not like Facebook made things any different.

    On life experiences, do you want to hear about how a guy would go about planning his own wedding? No, not really, that's an awful topic. But perhaps one day, you do, and you might learn something.

    [–]NickTM 3 points4 points ago

    Thing is though, often parents with children are utterly unable to see the other side of the debate. I enjoy watching track cycling Olympic events, but I can see why other people might not. Likewise, my friend likes downhill bike riding. I don't, but I can see why he enjoys it and accept that. When it comes to parents and their kids, however, there's literally no leeway for opinion whatsoever: you HAVE to stick to the group opinion and speak like a dickhead to a child in person, or in this case HAVE to put a positive comment on the picture if you comment at all.

    I've had people actually get angry with me for doing what you suggested and ignore baby pictures, because 'ickle babies are KA-YOOT and that's final, apparently. Besides, with Facebook it IS different. There's no option for hiding the stuff you don't want to see, but accepting the stuff you do.

    [–]Silix -1 points0 points ago

    Sure you can, just unsubscribe from their timeline. They won't even know. I mean if that's all they ever talk about then your life experiences aren't overlapping.

    I'm very happy for people to just ignore my updates that are related to my kid. He's 3 and we're playing D&D. I find that outright fascinating, but I don't insist that people have to listen to me whenever I open my mouth :)

    [–]Bloodari 3 points4 points ago

    Your argument might have been applicable if we were talking about one time posts, even then Bungee jumping is a HELL of a lot more interesting to see then a kid looking like every other kid out there. If the majority of the population has something your's, isn't fucking special just because. Do you post pictures of your favorite bush in your yard everyday? No, you don't, because everyone has a a bush in their yard and its not fucking interesting.
    Now bungee jumping or any real semi-unique and interesting life experience most people welcome to see because it IS interesting.

    [–]Silix 0 points1 point ago

    See, I think the definition of Interesting is related to your personal experiences. Something is interesting because you haven't seen it before.

    I find the thought that I can buy a bike, give it to my Mr3 and he'd just start peddling, without me ever showing him how to do it, extremely fascinating. I wonder, out loud, if I remove the trainer wheels how fast he'd learn to ride bike without them or falling over. It's extremely interesting. And so, say if I share this update, my friends who are in exactly the same life experience also finds this fascinating. Hmm, their kid is 4. And they haven't given their kid a bike. May be they'll try it too.

    We're sorry that we're sharing minute details regarding our kid's experiences that may be boring, but each experience is unique to us. If you really find us boring you can just ignore us - it's OK no hard feelings.

    You know, you see the sky is blue. Big deal. But wait until your kid tells you the sky is blue without you teaching him that. That is fascinating. Where did he learn that. Mum didn't teach him that, OK. Wow, did he figured it out himself. Does he want to know "why" it's blue? When he paints, does he now choose the blue colour for sky? Why does the sky become red at dusk or black in the evenings?

    These are awesome experiences that any parent is experiencing every day. I am filled with awe and can't help but share. Sorry if you find this boring.

    [–]XenoX101 0 points1 point ago

    I think it is more a matter of the amount people post when it is not something others might enjoy rather than the subject itself. It would perhaps be the equivalent of getting a new skateboard and posting every single time you learn a new trick, there would be an initial appeal and interest to seeing you skateboard and even to seeing a few tricks for those that aren't interested, but once you've posted 10+ skateboard tricks in the span of a week it becomes irritating for those who aren't so passionate about skateboarding. Perhaps the best way to perceive it is if you consider the updates as equivalent to talking to someone (it is in many ways), if it is a topic they don't enjoy then you are less likely to keep their attention for an extended period of time, where if it's something people are passionate about they can talk about it endlessly.

    [–]wbrycem 2 points3 points ago

    Difference between your bungie jumping analogy: Somebody posts one or two status updates, and maybe a photo album. Cool, great, looks fun. Somebody has a kid and that is All. They. Ever. Post. About. Every. Day. Pictures, status updates, stories, apps, and it floods my news feed with all of this shit about your baby which I do not care about. It becomes the only thing they ever post about. It's fucking annoying.

    No one's trying to outlaw baby posts ... people are complaining about the "HEY EVERYONE LOOK AT MY BABY" posts that happen about 200 times per day.

    Edit: go ahead and tell me about your biking trip. Just don't tell me about it all the time every day. Who the hell would go to facebook for planning a wedding anyway?

    [–]Silix -1 points0 points ago*

    You need to consider that you are not sharing the same life experience as them. I often share stuff that my kid is doing with my friends - who are mostly in the same experience, and we comment on each other's progress as a comparison on gauging whether we need to step up some sort of special training program (for walking, languages, or kid's social developments).

    Doesn't mean I stop being interested in the awesome food posts that my (yet to have kids) friends post. Or the fancy alcohols that they mix. Or the fantastic boardgame evenings that they run. But I don't have those experiences right now, so I can only cheer for them from the sidelines on those topics, and while sharing the experiences I am having right now.

    (re: wedding) Ah but when I was going through planning my wedding I made lots of updates on the weird things that I never thought I needed to worry about. And my friends made useful suggestions. It's a journey for everyone and I got help! Did you know a wedding vow has to have specific phrases - with a few minor variations, but you can mix in ANYTHING else in the gaps between the phrases, including references to Starwars or the Titanic. (provided your fiancee doesn't kill you)

    The kicker: you then get the priest to say it (cause you repeat it after him).

    [–]wbrycem 3 points4 points ago*

    Congrats on having a certain life experience. It doesn't mean you have to flood facebook with everything your kid does. Your kid got needles? Wonderful, don't give a shit. Your kid went to the dentist? Cool, maybe keep that to yourself, since really, no one gives a shit. I've experienced the dentist without feeling the need to make multiple posts about it. You took a picture of your kid playing with toys? Wonderful. I've played with all sorts of toys, how many facebook photos do you see of me doing that?

    You don't need to post about your shitty life experiences every 5 minutes. Put facebook down. Maybe share the experience with your kids if it's really that important to you.

    I'd also be willing to bet that they don't post about fancy alcohol mixes, awesome food posts, or fun boardgame nights 10x per day 7 days per week. It gets fucking annoying. Once in a while, go ahead. Multiple times per day everyday? Seriously? It's attention-whore-ish. "HEY EVERYONE I HAVE A BABY LOOK! LOOK AT MYYYYY BABY!"

    That and I don't have a problem with posts about food and alcoholic beverages and boardgames. Who doesn't want to know new foods to eat, new drinks to try, new boardgames to play? That actually has some practical use ... taking a picture of your kid wrapped in a towel really doesn't.

    And you missed the entire point of my post: they do it all the fucking time. It isn't just once in a while. It's nearly every. Single. Post. They. Make. It grates after a while. I just started deleting people that did that because it was too god damn annoying. I don't give a fuck if a dog barking down the street is keeping your baby awake. 99% sure that no one else does either.

    Edit: that makes more sense

    [–]DestroyerOfWombs 0 points1 point ago

    You're still missing the point. Volume. Thats the point.

    [–]Silix 0 points1 point ago

    I'm willing to concede that there might be people posting the same thing over and over.

    My point was that to the poster these are actually different experiences - but perhaps the differentiation is just too tiny for someone who's not interested in the first place to care about.

    Listening to my son singing a new song is, to me, completely different from him offering to take the shopping bags into the house like a trooper. But to others - it really is just me going on and on and on about my kid again.

    load more comments (1 reply)

      [–]drunxor 8 points9 points ago

      Also how r/pics looks some days

      [–]lightheat 1 point2 points ago

      Replace "kids" with "cats", and it's how /r/all looks every day.

      [–]xfireandpowderx 2 points3 points ago

      This is happening, except they are more like acquaintances from high school and I am 20.

      [–]ico2ico2 8 points9 points ago

      I hit unsubscribe the moment a friend has a child. It's going to be awkward when it's my wife...

      [–]NatalieHarkonnen 92 points93 points ago

      I never can understand why people bitch about this.

      My friends that aren't posting about their kids are posting pictures of the food they're eating, sharing pseudo-motivational pictures that are usually misogynistic/midandrist or idiotic, pleading for "likes" or comments for some facebook meme, or "checking in" at bars and restaurants and stores so everyone knows how much fun they're currently having.

      Facebook is a place to share a bunch of inane bullshit, yet people act like it's a major inconvenience to see pictures of children in their news feed.

      Why don't you just hide the friends that are sharing pictures/info about their kids (probably for family and real friends - many people actually do care)?

      [–]staplesgowhere 16 points17 points ago

      The problem is, people try to treat social networking as the equivalent of a personal relationship. When they see their friends posting things they aren't interested in they feel like they are doing it to rub it in their face. They don't consider the notion that grandparents and family members are the intended audience, not them. Likewise, the person posting the photos could stand to be more tactful in sharing them with the right people.

      If everyone thought of Facebook as a broadcast to a large group instead of a private conversation it would be a lot less frustrating for everyone.

      [–]PeeWeePangolin 5 points6 points ago

      Google Plus: "Hey guys, you know...umm...I can help you with that." (*crickets) "Oh."

      [–]NugentLuv 49 points50 points ago

      I get where you are coming from. It just isn't that easy. See some of these people I actually care about what they have to say... I just don't care about their kids is all. Yeah I could block them but I would miss out on what they are eating or the fun thing there dog just did.
      If there is one thing FB has taught me is that I dislike other peoples children.

      [–]PrinceRainbow 4 points5 points ago

      I wish the most annoying thing on my Facebook was pictures of babies. I gave up using it some time ago because I had aunts posting pictures of president Obama saying the pledge of allegiance with the wrong hand over his heart accompanied by the comment, "He's so un-American". Really? You're so retarded you've never even suspected that something like photoshop exists? Then there are cousins who misspell every other word, acquaintances who think everything has something to do with Jesus, friends who think their pets are humans, friends who don't realize that, at their age, describing their drunken antics is increasingly making them look pathetic...and...hmm... I forget what this was about. I hate Facebook.

      [–]Silix 8 points9 points ago*

      So OK, let's consider social as a method to share experiences. Everybody grow up, and go through different stages and have different life experiences. They share these experiences for other's to comment, share and enjoy.

      You post a picture because it's something that you've never seen before - may be it's food, may be its a funny car number plate. You also post a picture about your kid because that's something he's never done before. Honestly, if you stop and consider this, this little crap-maker is now walking and singing, and he is making associations in the world based on what he knows. It's freaking awesome.

      As one shared in that experience, I think one also gains some sympathy. I remember the days when I was single and minding my own business in a bus, and a kid would start crying - and I'd become unhappy and look at the mum expecting her to do something. I'd frown at the kid.

      Now, when I hear a baby crying in a bus, I still look at the mum - but now with far more sympathy. You know and she knows that the kid is annoying everyone in the bus. But what can she possibly do? The kid is feeling ill. If I catch the kid looking this way, I give him a big smile and a small friendly wave. Sometimes, a friendly gesture like that is enough to calm the kid down - with the mother beaming her untold gratefulness.

      If all your friends have moved on to the next stage of having kids, and are sharing and enjoying each other's experiences with their own children. I don't think there is anything wrong with that.

      Perhaps you'd rather your friends stayed in the same life experiences as you. Unfortunately, that would be unkind.

      A normal life stages may look something like this:

      Baby -> Kid -> Teenager/HS -> University/College -> Work -> Couple -> parent/kids

      When you become a parent - options such as fine dining becomes difficult - since you'll need to find a nanny. Travelling are extremely difficult - so your friends can't go to exotic places. Partying and all weekend sports competitions are also difficult. You may need to start thinking about getting a house, or looking for a good area for your kid to grow up in - so you can't live in those fancy suburbs. Your life stage is different, so your experiences are completely different.

      You can't get upset with other people because their life experiences are different from the ones that you are going through...

      Consider a different life stage - you and your friends are all working now with awesome disposable income and no dependents - so you are all posting pictures of your fancy work parties, the fine dining restaurants that you are now enjoying or the next hot gadget you'll be buying. Then your "other" friend started to complaint that he is still unemployed and thus don't appreciate all these experiences that you guys are having and sharing.

      It's not fair to you, or to him.

      Similarly, you complaining your friends have kids' experiences is completely unfair to them, and to yourself.

      [–]parsifal 19 points20 points ago

      Jesus Christ, Preachy McLongspeech up on the pulpit over here.

      [–]GotBetterThingsToDo 0 points1 point ago

      TL;WIHRBIWWI

      (Too Long; Wish I Hadn't Read Because It Wasn't Worth It)

      [–]NatalieHarkonnen 3 points4 points ago

      A few of my friends are known baby haters. So I blocked them from seeing my mobile uploads or baby-related pictures. Text, whatever, they can ignore that.

      If one of my friends told me I posted baby pics too often, I'd just offer to put them on that group that doesn't get baby pics. Or delete them, because seriously, my son is rad and if they can't just scroll past a picture of him to get to the "vanilla, cheesecake, and coconut frozen yogurt with rainbow sprinkles - mmm" post (how the hell is that more interesting than a human being?), then they aren't really the type of person I need to have included in my life.

      [–]NugentLuv 3 points4 points ago*

      I don't hate these people nor does it bother me that they are proud of their kids. I'm just not interested in them at all but this doesn't change the fact that they are my friends. I would never tell someone to stop posting what they want. But since this was a post about the subject I felt it was appropriate to bring it up. I wouldn't call myself a baby hatter cause in real life I don't mind them. But on FB I just don't give a shit. Oh and it might just be that I find it a lil bit creepy that people are so eager to put their kids out on the internet like this.

      [–]NatalieHarkonnen -1 points0 points ago

      My facebook is private. I only share pictures with my very closest friends and family.

      [–]XenoX101 -1 points0 points ago

      "Baby haters"? Well that's a bit of a stretch.

      [–]GotBetterThingsToDo -1 points0 points ago

      You know, no one else outside of your immediate family really cares about your rotten crotchfruit as much as you think they should.

      [–]holy_holy_holy -5 points-4 points ago

      Hate to sound like a dad here, but if someone is telling you to stop posting pictures of your kid then they are not your friend.

      [–]MaidenLane 0 points1 point ago

      If there is one thing FB has taught me is that I dislike other peoples children.

      Indeed. And the fact that I am never having children means I dislike all of them. :P

      [–]PoopyMcfartface 0 points1 point ago

      THIS TIMES A MILLION, WHY CAN'T PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THIS?

      You can show me your damn kid, just stop flooding me with pictures basically everyday.

      [–]Juvenall 11 points12 points ago

      ...for the same reason that no one understands that people don't really give a shit about all the other awful, self-inflating pretentious bullshit people post in an attempt to show off how their life is better than yours. No one really cares about where you went to dinner, who you went to the bar with, where you've checked in at, what new, expensive item you've wasted money on, or how in love you are with someone. We all just tolerate it because the unwritten rule of social networking is that I'll put up with your mindless dribble if you occasionally wade through mine.

      So yes, a flood of baby pictures are annoying, but show me something that's posted to facebook every single day that isn't and I'll print this comment and eat it.

      [–]MyAntiAlterEgo 0 points1 point ago

      I think you're right, but the imagery of someone eating their comment is too tempting to not try to find something worthwhile on a social network.

      [–]ricodued 0 points1 point ago

      I added them as a friend, not their fucking kid.

      [–]Juvenall 4 points5 points ago

      My point still stands, though. I added them as a friend, not foursquare/memebase/that dive bar you've probably never heard of/pictures of their friends having a good time/their car/worthless junk they like/etc.

      Personally, I think every time someone posts about how much they love Jesus, they should be stabbed in the face, but I put up with it because it's part of who they are. If I wasn't willing to deal with that, I wouldn't be friends with them.

      [–]akatherder 4 points5 points ago

      HERE'S A PICTURE OF MY BABY WRAPPED UP IN HIS DUCKY TOWEL AFTER SWIMMING TODAY: http://i.imgur.com/ddcSI.jpg

      [–]garotte80 2 points3 points ago

      Confirmed, you child is highly ordinary and completely uninteresting. Thank you for proving the argument.

      [–]Sprags 6 points7 points ago

      wow, I wasn't thinking of it that way. good point

      [–]Mannex 1 point2 points ago

      your friends must suck

      [–]holy_holy_holy 1 point2 points ago

      Well said. Also, I've noticed that the people who have the most problems like this on Facebook are "friends" with way too many people who aren't their actual friends.

      [–]Brocktoon_in_a_jar 3 points4 points ago

      I know it's dumb to get worked up over this, but I do wish more of my friends would post something original or witty once in a while. I can't shoulder the burden for everyone all the time. Even my brain needs to rest sometimes.

      [–]garotte80 0 points1 point ago

      "Facebook is a place to share a bunch of inane bullshit"

      Thats why Google+ exists. For now at least it caters for people not obsessed with being the typical nuclear parent. Most people use Facebook and most people end up getting married and having kids. You are bound to see loads of these updates, that you have to be that kind of person not to hate. If you don't like that, use a niche social website.

      [–]GotBetterThingsToDo 0 points1 point ago

      My friends with kids post pictures of their food that their kids are eating, so up yours.

      [–]DamiansKitten -1 points0 points ago

      Sharing pics and vids of my kid is the only reason I have Facebook. I warned everyone of this, most of them don't give a shit. They think my kid's cute.

      [–]PPKAP -1 points0 points ago

      Suuuuuuuure they do. Is your baby ridiculously photogenic?

      [–]DamiansKitten 0 points1 point ago

      Yes. And there's 5 people on my friends list who aren't family, 3 know my girl and like her, the other two love kids.

      [–]parsifal -4 points-3 points ago

      1) People lament that their friends fucking disappeared from their lives, leaving only a trail of photos, each as indistinguishable as the last.

      2) It is really obnoxious. Album after album of photos of a baby just sitting there. And the endless baby profile photos. And all the relatives commenting, "AWWWW YOU HAVE A BABY AHHHHH!!!"

      It's fucking bullshit.

      load more comments (3 replies)

        [–]MrMcQuone 5 points6 points ago

        I was thinking the same thing, except my 'friends' are aged 16-21

        [–]ncastleJC 2 points3 points ago

        As a single 20 year-old, that's how I feel about people updating their relationship status.

        [–]KitchenNinja 2 points3 points ago

        Being a parent, I make an effort to not post pictures too often. I also hate too many pictures of kids on fb, and made a conscious effort not to be like that. I am told I went too far to the extreme of not posting pictures, even.

        That being said, the same people who complain about it are also people who post repetitive shit. My sister in law complains about kid pictures, and then posts updates at least once a day related to her diet, going to the gym or running. In my opinion, that's worse. At least the kid can be cute, your exercise and eating habits, not so much.

        [–]RhiannonRae 2 points3 points ago

        It's like we get the point you're proud of your creation, but you don't have to snap a photo every time the little mushball breathes.

        [–]Alps09 6 points7 points ago

        Im going to be downvoted for saying this, but isn't the whole point of Facebook to share your life with your "friends " ? Now I don't frequent Facebook , but if people posting pictures of their spawn/poop/pet isn't appealing to you then maybe Facebook isn't for you.

        [–]MyAntiAlterEgo 22 points23 points ago*

        I acknowledge that by writing this I am writing my own check for downvotes.

        People bitch constantly about shit like this.

        "Oh, your kid can sit up, BFD, I can sit up too. Are you gonna take pictures of me and post them on your Facebook page?"

        "Oooooh, a video of your baby spouting gibberish. I do that shit when I'm drunk and I don't post videos of it everywhere."

        Here's the damn secret non-kid having assholes. Kids come out with the ability to do exactly three things: eat, scream and shit.

        After 9 months of not knowing what the fuck to expect the new parent gets a rude awakening. You have to do everything for this little screaming shit machine. All it does is scream and eat and shit. It can't clean up after itself. It eats your whole damn life. All you can do after the birth is take care of this kid. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. All you can fucking think about is this kid, because if you stop thinking about the kid for a second you'll ignite a screaming shitfest. FSM help us all if that kid has a stomach ache because you fed it when you should have tried to get it to sleep.

        The only way to get through it is to remind yourself, I love this kid, this kid is my progeny and legacy.

        Then the kid has a particularly nasty smelly shit that you've got to wipe off while they scream and wriggle and make it as difficult as possible to actually clean their ass for them.

        So when the kid is actually able to do something besides the unholy trinity you freak the fuck out.

        This kid is babbling. Holy shit! The kid isn't screaming at me!

        The kid is sitting up! Fucking amazing! Couldn't even hold it's damn head up and now it can sit!

        So before you bitch about your friends posting pictures of their kids, try to remember that the little shit machine has been eating every second of their lives and the only way they can get through it is to keep telling themselves that they love it and it's the cutest damn thing ever created. Because if they didn't, they'd kill the damn thing, then themselves.

        TL;DR - Your friends post pictures of their kids and fawn over them all the time because this is their life now.

        Edit: better picture

        [–]godplaysdice 6 points7 points ago

        Welp, I'm never having kids.

        [–]KailuaGirl 1 point2 points ago

        omg. That picture made me laugh so hard.

        Also, you have a good point. Upvote.

        [–]GotBetterThingsToDo 0 points1 point ago

        Just wait until you hear that about a third of the time the process of getting one out of your bleedhole results in tearing it all the way to your poophole. Yay!

        [–]NickTM 0 points1 point ago

        Really good point.

        Still, though, I shouldn't have to give my friends leeway for stupid amounts of baby pictures just because they decided to make a portable vomit cannon and suffered the consequences.

        [–]akatherder 0 points1 point ago

        The only way to get through it is to remind yourself, I love this kid, this kid is my progeny and legacy.

        I agree with 99% of what you said, except for one of your more important points. It isn't really a coping mechanism. I don't put my kids on a pedestal because I have so much invested in them. There is a huge biological factor to thinking your own kid is fucking bad-ass though. It's hardwired into your brain. That's why you can tolerate their shit and you're proud of the little things you see them do for the first time, as unimpressive as they may seem.

        When I see other kids doing something, it pisses me right off. But I have no delusions that my kids don't do some dumb shit and they can be annoying. With my own kid, it just gets me thinking "How do I teach him not to do this dumb, annoying shit?" It's an opportunity to improve/learn, not some annoying shitbag who is screaming at Denny's.

        [–]kg333 3 points4 points ago

        People post things they think are important on Facebook. Imagine that.

        [–]akumadiavolo 19 points20 points ago

        Simple solution, stop using that POS site and find something better to do with your time.

        [–]drburropile 15 points16 points ago

        You incite has made me realize the same reason I quit fb a few years ago has about 90% the same reasons I should stop going on reddit.

        [–]shhhhhhhhh 1 point2 points ago

        What ever happened to penpals?

        load more comments (7 replies)

          [–]RAWLG 6 points7 points ago

          Yeah! Like surf on reddit.

          [–]IIoWoII 1 point2 points ago

          How rebelious.

          [–]LikeFireAndIce 0 points1 point ago

          Look, if I leave facebook, my mom will be unable to hassle me over the internet, which appears to be the one thing that gives her life any purpose. If I leave facebook, she might become a redditor. And then find my username.

          We really can't have that.

          [–]Mannex -1 points0 points ago

          so brave...

          [–]adapotata 1 point2 points ago

          i was so done with all the obnoxious pictures on FB i deleted it.

          ohhh so you hate him and you cant believe you're still with him?

          he treats you like shit? goes out drinking all night with his"boys"?

          "We're having a BABY! I LOVE HIM! BEST FATHER EVER!"

          FKN SHOOT ME NOW.

          [–]Silix 0 points1 point ago

          You know, you can just have better friends. Or even just unsubscribe from their updates without de-friending.

          FB, Reddit, real life, social is social and is the same everywhere. If you want to associate with stupid people then don't complain about having to listen to their stupidity. At least when things are digital you can ignore them without offending them.

          [–]adapotata 0 points1 point ago

          WOW. ok. LOL

          [–]soldierhere 4 points5 points ago

          So its not just me? This year no one could say they were pregnant for April Fools because everyone really is pregnant this year.

          [–]imherefortheaww 0 points1 point ago

          A few people on my FB said they were preggo with twins - April Fools!

          [–]xebo 1 point2 points ago

          Oh man, I share your pain MofoJack. I share your pain!

          One of my cousins had two kids, the other joined the military, and my sister bought a chihuahua . Every fucking day all I see are baby pics, rifle+sunglasses pics, or "babydoll is sick and has runny stool" pics.

          I've just defriended all of my family at this point. I don't fucking care. I just don't.

          [–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

          Wait till they all start having kids intentionally...

          [–]Landeyda 1 point2 points ago

          Just remember they're brainwashed by biology, and never fall for their lies of how great children are.

          [–]urbanfury 1 point2 points ago

          This also applies to several of my female friends who own cats.

          [–]huh_nope_what 1 point2 points ago

          When we had our son I posted a metric shit tonne of pics and updates about him for the first month. I realized that not everybody would care so I created his own account (Facebook TOS be damned) and told anyone who wanted to get updates about him to friend him instead. About 40% did and he even has friends that aren't on my friend list...some of them are my family and others are former classmates. People like seeing status updates from a baby.

          I get aggravated with stupid shit on Facebook all the time (updates every 20 minutes on everything that crosses their mind to bullshit game requests). That said, if somebody aggravates me on Facebook I change what updates I see, unsubscribe or unfriend them. I mean it's THEIR Facebook wall, you following is entirely voluntary.

          [–]SniperGX1 1 point2 points ago

          In my short time on facebook I have learned that I don't give two shits about your kid, pet, or significant other. Then there was no remaining content so i deleted my acct

          [–]Mr_Quagmire 1 point2 points ago

          I agree!!

          http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3ofuj6/

          [–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

          Imagine like 15 years down the road, when the kid is in high school, and everyone will be able to see him in his diapers online. Fucking scary thought, the kids whole life will have been chronicled on facebook.

          [–]holy_holy_holy 0 points1 point ago

          That thought has occurred to me more than once, lol. Have to start phasing out pics of my kids on Facebook when they get older... Unless they piss me off as teenagers.

          [–]Mannex 1 point2 points ago

          I'm almost glad all my friends are a bunch of forever alones

          [–]wayfaremonk 1 point2 points ago

          I bet if they were posting about their unborn cats you wouldn't mind.

          [–]MaidenLane 1 point2 points ago

          ...BREEDERS... The cause of, and solution to, all of the world's problems...

          [–]chimpparts 3 points4 points ago

          Oh my fuck. It's terrible right? My sister spawned and that's all my fucking parents talk about when they call. It drives me absolutely bananas.

          [–]Ikimasen 2 points3 points ago

          Facebook actually PREVENTS that behavior. People "post" things to Facebook, like a telephone pole or a bulletin board, and you can choose whether you look at them or not. People get to satisfy their urge to share pictures of their kids without actually having to put them in your face like that.

          [–]holy_holy_holy 0 points1 point ago

          Apparently you were downvoted because you actually understand how Facebook works. It isn't a difficult concept, I have no idea why people like the OP and the forever alones in this thread don't understand it: if you don't care about someone or what matters to them, you aren't really friends and you don't need to be friends on Facebok.

          [–]Not_Slim_Shady 2 points3 points ago

          Profile picture? Baby. Cover photo? Baby. Friends with? Baby.

          [–]OrionStarr 1 point2 points ago

          Jesus, I can't take it anymore! "8 weeks til [baby] is here!" "Here's this week's picture of my grossly engorged abdomen!" "Picked out a bland color for the baby room!"

          FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

          [–]roadsiderick 1 point2 points ago

          You are shitty friends. They are better off without you.

          Can't you be patient enough to understand that this is a very big and joyful part of their lives?

          Just go back to your video games, please.

          [–]pm27 2 points3 points ago

          Goddammit I'm not alone!

          [–]VanCardboardbox 0 points1 point ago*

          Reddit's Greatest Hits, disc1, track 11: "I should not have to care about other people's children. Stop asking me to."

          EDIT: In fairness, I do understand this is a natural consequence of the relatively young average age of Reddit denizens. As a parent, it always makes me feel sad to be reminded that there are a great many people out there who regard children only as an annoyance.

          [–]PoopyMcfartface 5 points6 points ago

          As a parent, it always makes me feel sad to be reminded that there are a great many people out there who regard children only as an annoyance.

          Does that surprise you though? It makes a lot of sense, they are loud, annoying, and stupid; what's there to like? I get that some people find them cute or whatever, but I don't get how that overrides their annoying nature. I feel like the only kids I will ever be able to tolerate, are my own.

          [–]VanCardboardbox 2 points3 points ago

          they are loud, annoying, and stupid; what's there to like? I get that some people find them cute or whatever, but I don't get how that overrides their annoying nature.

          Yeah, I think I'm starting to get the picture...

          [–]valdin450 0 points1 point ago

          When you have a kid, you get defriended. Problem solved.

          [–]Jemstar -2 points-1 points ago

          Yep. Agree 1000000%. Even though that is mathematically unnecessary.

          [–]Honestly_ 2 points3 points ago*

          As soon as my kid was born my wife and I made a solemn vow not to be the ones who spam everyone on FB with baby photos (I think it helps that my wife's culture believes in evil eye and I just find it irritating). We may eventually do a Christmas card, but we plan to make it (hopefully tastefully) make fun of all the parents who think I give a damn about what their kids look like (especially when I only kind of know who they are; e.g. I welcome the card from my godson's parents). If my friends really care they can come visit and vice versa; that's how you learn who really gives a damn.

          tl;dr: We vowed to not be these people on FB or IRL.

          [–]JonnyBrah 0 points1 point ago

          It kind of feels like someone that post these pictures are deliberantly downvoting everyone's comment.

          [–]Mase12 0 points1 point ago

          Could've sworn I saw this a month ago ?

          [–]redorm 0 points1 point ago

          http://www.stfuparentsblog.com/

          [–]BURN_THE_WITCH 0 points1 point ago

          I grew up in a town (Corpus Christi, TX) with an abnormally high teen pregnancy rate. I've always had so many peers with kids that I'll never know what it's like to feel weird about all my friends having kids.

          [–]Zeppelanoid 0 points1 point ago

          That lined up really well with the song I was listening to.

          [–]penisinthepeanutbttr 0 points1 point ago

          that is and always will be one of my favorite family guy bits

          [–]Kickawesome 0 points1 point ago

          It wouldn't be so bad if the new mothers didn't post pictures 30 seconds out of the womb, before the babies have even been cleaned.

          [–]sellyberry 0 points1 point ago

          I've seen a comic on Reddit and a FIXED with 2 couples sitting talking, one set has a bubble that is just "Baby, baby baby, baby. Baby" and the fixed has the woman of the second couple thinking, "Baby Baby Baby", also.

          [–]TripKnot 0 points1 point ago

          Everybody in my feed this week were just trading vasectomy stories. The difference a few years make.

          [–]AtTheLeftThere 0 points1 point ago

          this was literally almost word for word from a post about a month ago.

          [–]harvest_poon 0 points1 point ago

          I usually keep them as friends just in case they smother their kids in a fit of postpartum depression and I can find out about it on facebook. Either

          That or wait it out a few years and enjoy watching them complain about their miserable crotchfruit online.

          [–]panmil 0 points1 point ago

          What are you, 17?

          [–]iceman78772 0 points1 point ago

          This has been used......Alot

          [–]knikkerz 0 points1 point ago

          this is the 3rd time today that someone has commented on the fact that their news feeds are full of bbz having bbz. (all from different states) D ';

          [–]ok_you_win 0 points1 point ago

          Mine are past that. Now they are all getting religion. At least the kind that says "repost if Jesus is with you".

          [–]TheUsher 0 points1 point ago

          Yeah, times move on. Those pictures of vomit covered toilets with your friends head next to them only last so long. I assume, you're still posting those barf fiestas.

          [–]c0cksmagoo 0 points1 point ago

          what more to life is there other than breeding and minimum wage?

          [–]kngghst 0 points1 point ago*

          I don't see how a thumbnailed picture in a scrolling feed is comparable to someone shoving an actual physical picture in your face.

          There's two reasons I post pictures of my kids whenever I get a chance:

          1. They're cute.
          2. It gets on the nerves of idiots.

          Showing off my kids is more important to me than the feelings of some butthurt dweller on Facebook. I'm sure most other parents feel the same way.

          [–]conanarama -1 points0 points ago

          I was seriously just thinking that same thing today.

          [–]J_is_for_Jenius -1 points0 points ago

          ohhh man...I'm dealing with this so hardcore right now. I'm so sick of kids and all it's done is solidify even further my vow to never have them. Fuck that, I like drinkin'.

          [–]directrix688 1 point2 points ago

          I know! I would much rather read about what someone had for lunch or how much their hangover sucks.

          [–]DrunkmanDoodoo 0 points1 point ago

          Everybody on Earth (close to 7 billion) was someones baby at one point in time. I fail to see the "miracle" of it just because it happened to you.

          [–]soccer_comic 0 points1 point ago

          Also Reddit, with dead relatives

          [–]urizenxvii 0 points1 point ago

          So guilty of this.

          [–]yesukai 0 points1 point ago

          Yes, you are the guy who stands there with a smile on his face while be hit with pictures over and over again; you are in complete control over what you do and do not see online.

          [–]raginga 0 points1 point ago

          Ignore them then maybe? Instead of going here on reddit to make a fucking post about it.. lol.

          [–]icelolly 0 points1 point ago

          I genuinely like seeing pictures of my friends cute kids.

          I think everyone just needs to take a deep breath and chill out. Chances are you post things a lot of people don't care about to Facebook too. Just scroll past it, it takes less than a second.

          [–]saumer 0 points1 point ago

          How dare they interrupt your whining about shitty bands and canceled TV shows with important life changing moments.

          [–]edwartica 0 points1 point ago

          The pictures aren't that bad. What I hate are the people who think their spawn said the cutest thing today - about twenty times a day. Or "she's sooo smart, she figured out how to blah blah blah...." No, maybe you were just a dumb kid yourself and she's average.

          /single and no kids in his 30s rant

          [–]SaintLonginus 0 points1 point ago

          To be fair, it hardly seems worth complaining about.

          1) You can edit your newsfeed so you don't have to see these pictures 2) If all of your friends are having babies then this is what their life is all about. They want to share pictures with the rest of their friends having babies. Just because you're not doing the same doesn't mean you should expect everyone else to cater to you.

          [–]Mason11987 -1 points0 points ago

          Those people are hidden from my news feed.

          [–]lostmatthew -2 points-1 points ago

          Oh your God, you and I may be sharing the same life.

          [–]appi -3 points-2 points ago

          It's also a quarter of Reddit

          [–]Bwenj -1 points0 points ago

          Dammit don't use Family Guy. It sucks.

          [–]JakJakAttacks -2 points-1 points ago

          Yep. This is mine too.

          At first it was them getting married. Then their progressively swollen bellies with them holding up "x weeks" on a piece of paper.

          Now it's their babies making faces, and crawling. I don't care that it took you 9 months to take a shit, stop showing me!

          [–]MisterDonkey -2 points-1 points ago

          My Facebook news feed entire social life now that all my friends are having kids...

          I can't schedule my life around your children. Sorry about not *hanging out* with you anymore, along with your 4 or 5 uncontrollable kids.

          It's just not the same good times we had. Maybe you can get together with so-and-so, and their kids, and take your kids together to play in the park. I'll be out doing fun things. Call me when you're not too busy (I won't be waiting by the phone).

          [–]holy_holy_holy 0 points1 point ago

          You're gonna be waiting a long time. If you're too important to be bothered by the children of your friends, your friends are gonna pick their kids over you.

          [–]MisterDonkey 1 point2 points ago

          Yes. That is what I was insinuating.

          I won't be waiting by the phone.

          And I am too important: The things that I enjoy, which make me happy, are not conducive to playtime with children. I refuse to sacrifice my happiness for the sake of others' lifestyle choices or simple lack of birth-control.

          I'm heartless, I know. But I can't fake a smile, and I'm a terrible liar.

          I cut ties after high school. No phone. No Facebook. No drama. No problem. It's fun to reminisce, but memories are intangible afterthoughts. When that moment is gone, the dream dies with it. I am an island.

          [–]mckinseykm -1 points0 points ago

          There's a lot of people announcing that they're pregnant recently, and I think I've figured out why. Women/couples typically wait till after the first trimester to announce that they're pregnant correct? Well if we look back approximately 3 months ago, we come to January. Early January. A lot of people were having New Years sex.

          [–]rougepenguin 0 points1 point ago

          Isn't September also the most common birth month?

          [–]mckinseykm 0 points1 point ago

          According to the NYT (source) the most common birthday is September 16th, but also according to the data there are a peak around mid September for most common birthdays. This means that maybe my guess should be pushed back a week or two, so not New Years sex. Pre-Christmas/Christmas sex.

          [–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

          I fixed this problem I deleted my facebook account.

          I don't understand why serious people still use it.

          [–]holy_holy_holy -1 points0 points ago

          It's terrible the way they force you to look at every picture they post. It's not like you can just scroll past it or anything. This needs to be stopped, you should really take a stand.

          load more comments (11 replies)

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