Me and my girlfriend watching a movie when suddenly she asks me if I want a blowjob

donmakaveli7 · 5 months

At which you responded, "For future reference, you never have to ask me that again......"

bicfox · 5 months

I offered my boyfriend a blowjob when we were watching Fast 5 the other night. There was no confetti, no excitement. No, he just said, "I'm watching this. Maybe later."

What is the girl equivalent of cockblocking? Because I got cockblocked by Vin Diesel.

stan_tm · 5 months

The only way I could stop my girlfriend giving me blowjobs was to marry her.

True story.

impurethoughts · 5 months

Most redditors

Sexwax · 5 months

this isn't my boyfriend, is it? I can't be too sure.

daniellemx · 5 months

I once gave my boyfriend a blowjob while he was playing my paper mario on n64. He cheated on me a month later. Ungrateful asshole >:(

klevenisms204 · 5 months

funny thing is, when starting to date a new girl, there is always that thought in the back of your head that when you watch a movie together... "k, i got 103 minutes for somethin good to happen".. then you start trying to scheme together a plan

Raytracer · 5 months

you are lucky indeed, mine does not ask, just unzips and starts to suck it

thirty-three3rar · 5 months

Really, she asked? I usually just go down on my boyfriend without even asking and he never minds that I do that

bluepheonixia · 5 months

If you ever want to get laid, put on an obscure movie you like. Two situations happen from there: you either watch the movie and enjoy the hell out of it, or she has sex with you so she doesn't have to watch the movie. Either way you win!

Estoye · 5 months

A few years ago my girlfriend gave me a blowjob during the Super Bowl. I had to high-five myself.

Yeargdribble · 5 months

When I was younger I could've gone all day. My wife and I would regularly have lots of sex on weekdays and have marathons on weekends sometimes approaching double digits on a single day if we had nothing else to do.

However, as I near 30, and even for the past several years. I'm actually just not in the mood sometimes. My wife's libido has out-paced mine and seems to be rising consistently while mine declines. It doesn't matter if it's sex or a BJ, sometimes, I'm just not interested. My wife is awesome at giving head and offers it all the time, but sometimes I'm just tired, or busy, or want to do something else for relaxation.

Luckily, even if I'm not in the mood, I can still get myself up and service her so at least we don't have to worry too much about libidos not syncing up, even though we both vastly prefer it when we're both interested.

When I see people post stuff like this it makes me think they are younger and probably don't get laid much or are in a long-term relationship with someone who hates giving head or treats sexual favors as commodities. I'm so glad I don't have to deal with that crap.

Honestly, it reminds me of the juvenile BS I see from people being idiots with regard to porn stars, "Man, I'd never get limp. Man, why's he having to jack it. I could cum in 3 seconds with that girl." These are obviously people haven't considered the realities of the situation and it sounds ridiculously immature. That's basically how I feel about this worship of the blowjob. I love blowjobs, but it's not a planet aligning event.

tatumcs · 5 months

I would tell you to marry that woman, but if you do then she will never utter that phrase again...it's a Catch 22.

PA55W0RD · 5 months

Where are these girlfriends that offer blowjobs?

TripleDelight · 5 months

Why is it that she has to A) want something, B) dislike the movie, C) be setting a trap? Maybe she just wanted to give him a blowjob. Some people have awesome significant others.

Hlidarendi · 5 months

Ed Helms, is that you?

maxman3000 · 5 months

This one is slightly better.

silverscreemer · 5 months

I want to live a life where I have to worry about staying nice and clean 24/7 because of all the surprise sex and blowjobs I'm being offered by the lady I love.

carnenom · 5 months

I want to do this to my boyfriend , especially when I first wake up, but I never have the courage to tell him. :(

thuggronald · 5 months

Is that the Andy from the Office? I can never remember his real name.

ladywazowski · 5 months

I got another I'm on my period blowjob last night. Boy howdy - it sure beats the other nights when she curls up on the couch and hates me

NothingGoodAvailable · 5 months

My girlfriend never does one ever, she prefers to lay there. I'd rather buy a bag of bagels.

rezfrog · 5 months

http://youtu.be/pR1Mmxr2Cb4 -- video of this guy... haha

cashesking · 5 months

There was a time when I thought these random blow jobs were solid. It was perfect. Then when we broke up and the shit hit the fan. She told me she only gave me blow jobs because she had recently cheated on me and wouldn't have sex with me until she got tested and was clean ... I couldn't even count how many times I randomly got a blow job... ಠ_ಠ

TDLR; She's cheating on you

17-yr-old-8th-grader · 5 months

How did you get your sock to talk to you?

bilbo_swaggins · 5 months

I don't wanna be that guy but, her asking kinda ruins it. Now I'm not trying to knock your good time there fella, I just think it's better when the girl just does it.

Damknot · 5 months

for some reason, The price is right theme song started playing in my head when I saw this.

hzlaugher · 5 months

Is that Ed Helms?

xiregulatorix · 5 months

driving around with my newly acquired gf

"so have you ever gotten road head?"

quick thinking, what is the optimal response?

"No."

"Do you want some?"

Successkid.jpg

brand0n · 5 months

just wanted to let you know that in ONE submission you have gained more karma than I have in over a year.

iamst3 · 5 months

Letmethinkaboutityes.

bokbok · 5 months

Never understood the need to ask if your man needs one. Just do it ladies. It's much more fun that way and we dig surprise blowjobs.

PantlesSmurf · 5 months

Lucky...

InterruptingCat27 · 5 months

The full video of this guy's reaction is even funnier!

jasongtr · 5 months

I LOL'ed SO hard

Voltairus · 5 months

She shouldn't have to ask, she should just KNOW.

thefinalfall · 5 months

What is this Girlfriend asks me if i want a blowjob sorcery?

woodycanuck · 5 months

I'll never understand why they bother asking.

moof77 · 5 months

The movie was a porn, his girlfriend is his hand, end of story

HouseOfKrazees · 5 months

This happened to me once. It was the best thing ever I think next to discovering Reddit.

chean · 5 months

Hi this is the sex police.

It appears you are engaging in unlawful sexual activities. You will burn in hell for this.

SANTORUM 2012

funny

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