How it feels to be the sober one at a party

proto04 · 6 months

For me, it's usually relatively enjoyable assuming not everyone knows you are sober. If you are drinking soda, people will ask "Why aren't you drinking?" and other idiotic questions, but if you just hold a drink in a cup and go with the flow it can be alright.

NowMichaelBay-ified · 6 months

Awww...how cute.

Bobokeys · 6 months

I don't know why peeps are always complaining about being the "sober" one at the party. The sober ones are THE KEEPERS OF THE STORIES! You and only you know the truth about what happened that night............

sylphofspace · 6 months

Sometimes I hate being the responsible one.

Aholymost · 6 months

I cannot describe the joy this picture brings me. The owl being vomited(?) on looks so perfectly pissed off.

maddyzeemak · 6 months

How I feel.

Bartelbythescrivener · 6 months

I don't get it. What's sober.

EnglishSirSir · 6 months

That is why I'm never the responsible one. Party on Wayne

Higlac · 6 months

Want to know something neat? The original picture isn't just someone being a dumbass and taking a picture of it. Owls actually enjoy a cool shower on a hot summer's day. The zoo I used to work at frequently sprayed down the Great Horned Owls to keep them cool in 100+ degree weather.

This little known fact was discovered while spraying shit off of a wall.

alli_emily · 6 months

Zero fucks were given.

doodlecakes · 6 months

**How it feels to sit in the front row of the class with the lispy professor.

rm_a · 6 months

Something like this happened to me not too long ago. I'm one of the only people I hang with that doesn't drink, which I'm cool with. So people start pulling out beers and somebody gets the idea to start doing Coronas with limes. We're all freshmen in college, and nobody knows what the hell they're doing.
So one guy cuts the lime up with a box cutter, because fuck the system, and hands out chunks of limes. One of the girls puts the lime on the top of the bottle and at won't go into the bottle because it's kinda hard to cut a lime perfectly with a box cutter and these chucks of lime were fucking huge. Well somebody else gets the lime into his bottle and says something along the lines of "Use your thumb and push it down." Well this girl did exactly that, but puts the entire chunk all the way into the beer. The beer foams up and explodes and as she tries to keep herself from getting covered in beer, she douses the only sober person in the room (me). I narrowly avoid an RA on the way back to my room to change my beer-soaked shirt.
Tl;dr Wow this story sounds lame on reddit, but was funny in real life.

akadashay · 6 months

As someone who doesn't drink, but loves to hang with his friends that get absolutely shit-faced, I love this.

OHH the things I've seen.

IComeToMakeAmends · 6 months

This reminds me of a funny story that I heard from my friend when he went to a classic "Everybody Drinks with no Fucks Given" parties.

To set the scene, it was a Friday night with about a 60-40 ratio drunken girls to drunken guys. He was having a blast drinking himself under the table and watching as all the women in the room were progressively getting hotter. The friend's house he was partying at was getting equally drunk and as was mingling with all the people in his basement. As the night progressed they were both finding that they just wanted to get a tail on the side for that night and couldn't help but notice that there was only one usable bed for the night. Being a gracious host, one allowed the other to "get it on" for the night in his bed because he didn't think his parents would like the unfamiliar motion in their bed for the night. After all was said and done and 5 a.m. was rolling around the still drunk party host decided it would be alright to hop into bed. The friend was too drunk to care at that point and they were now all sleeping in the same bed, two of them half naked with the stank of sex everywhere.

Skip two hours later, the host waking up hungover but now completely aware of his surroundings. The other two still barely sleeping, still heavily plastered. The host turns around to wake up his buddy who turns over, eyes practically sealed shut with the crust of more than the usual bodily fluid, leans over, looks over to the host and starts vomiting everywhere on his bed and HIM. The host shoves him off the bed (over the still sleeping drunk girl) while he's still puking, and starts to puke himself. Not knowing whats going on his friend tries to get up by pulling on the sheets and wraps himself, the girl, and the host in vomit covered sheets. As the one friend's designated driver comes in (for high school even I was surprised about that part) looks at the situation, displeased, tells him that he's staying here today and leaves.

TL;DR: Drunken High school party's designated driver walks in on 3 people wrapped in vomit covered sheets, leaves.

northbayray · 6 months

I usually just look around and think to myself, "I'm not that big of an asshole, am I? Naaaaaahhhhhh!"

buttplugpeddler · 6 months

This is fucking awesome.

7WCW7 · 6 months

Title-joke posts should get even more credit, because it's an example of someone making a somewhat funny picture much more funny than it ever had the right to be...and that's commendable.

groovingupslowly · 6 months

orly?

tchiseen · 6 months

I feel like this most days.

log_ladys_log · 6 months

the owls are not what they seem.

LocrianMode · 6 months

When I'm the sober one at the party I find ways to entertain myself. One thing I would do is I would start random conversations with drunk people and then just start speaking more and more slowly and dropping the pitch of my voice. I seriously freaked out a friend of mine who thought he was going insane.

GIF_FOR_THAT · 6 months

They are making fools of themselves... perfect

SimilarImage · 6 months

Age	User	Title	Reddit	Cmnt	Points
8 months	jansen1	I hate when people do this when they talk	/r/pics	77	700
7 months	FlockofSeagulls	Owls have Mondays too.....	here	10	129

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beer_madness · 6 months

I'm never the sober one at the party. What a waste of party.

IncompetentZooligist · 6 months

This is actually quite a common and interesting behavior among owls that most people aren't aware of. Some smaller species of owls, such as the Zebra Owl seen here, have extremely fast metabolisms, and the fluid regurgitated by the larger owl serves to cool it down. Just in the nick of time in this case, fortunately, as the smaller owl was about to burst into flames. You can tell by the way its talons are splayed.

Normally this activity is only performed during moonlight, which is why photographs are so rare, but I have observed it thousands of times, using special goggles of course. It has evolved from a symbiotic behavior of necessity into a mating ritual, which is unfortunate for the smaller owl, since both of these specimens are male. In other words, to put it as delicately as possible in lay terms, the smaller owl is about to be carnally victimized by the larger owl in some rather unpalatable and deplorable ways. Homosexual rape is in fact much more common among owls than most people realize. They tend to leave it out of the high school biology textbooks for some reason. But I have observed it thousands of times, using special goggles of course. Definitely not for the squeamish or the deeply religious.

mrsully1981 · 6 months

been there man

twigggg · 6 months

This is also how it feels to be the nurturing drunk at a party.

FeistyEmu · 6 months

Seriously and then it just leads you to wanting to strangle the offending owl.

CaptAwesomepants · 6 months

I live in New Orleans. I work until 11 pm on Friday nights. Some of my buddies were in town, and already on Bourbon Street. I met them out after work on a Friday.

It was the ultimate "sober at a party experience" until I started drinking.

toph2point0 · 6 months

So glad I hadn't just taken a sip of water when I clicked on this link.

HuminByrd · 6 months

This would make a beautiful FML

FUCITADEL · 6 months

Do you often party at vomitoriums? Is that your thing?

5herlock_Holmes · 6 months

As a bartender I can agree.

MrUmibozu · 6 months

I think it's better than being fucked up and surrounded by sober people.

At some people you feel like the worlds biggest asshole.

TenaciasLee · 6 months

Wow I laughed so hard at this, well done here's an upvote!

drakcol · 6 months

And thats why I try not to be the sober one

INCEPTION_IN_MY_ANUS · 6 months

I have witnessed this with some bimbo who wouldn't leave my brother alone. She vomited EVERYWHERE. Someone recorded it but I don't think it's on YouTube... I can't believe owls are what made me remember this. I have a new mission in life now: get that video on the internet.

Toolmantime · 6 months

I guess I can't empathize. I wouldn't go to a party if I wasn't going to get drunk.

Justavian · 6 months

The question is, does the feeling of being annoyed at the party outweigh the feeling of being annoyed at yourself the next day when you remember being a jackass. That info would help to make decisions for the next party.

OL_Matey_Australia · 6 months

Owls cant fuckin drink mate.

Sagillarious · 6 months

I like being the one who doesn't drink or do drugs anymore. I get to act crazy when I'm dancing, laugh at the ridiculous things drunk people are saying/doing, hit on cute girls with coherent sentences, and get the people I care about home safely.

Wut_Ur_Mom_Would_Say · 6 months

You don't have to drink to have fun Maestro

jrk08004 · 6 months

I don't always legitimately laugh out loud at an image,

but when I do it's because it's legitimately funny.

Regnbyxor · 6 months

I never drink, but often get to hear stories about how drunk I was the day after. No, I was just dancing and enjoying myself. You don't need alcohol for that.

reynej · 6 months

I worked the door of a night club when I was 22. You have no idea how annoying drunk people are when you are stone sober at 3am. The other disturbing thing is how turned off I was by the trashed girls in skimpy clothes.

heh_wut · 6 months

"what are you talking about i was just tipsy, i didn't need that help from you, you know"

"... you were rubbing up again the wall just to walk..."

a thank you is all i ask for. stop denying ffs, you just drank too much.

Barong02 · 6 months

I think this picture is more relevant to homeless people trying to talk to me about modern day issues and politics as I walk somewhere.

ukp42 · 6 months

made me laugh thank you. have an up vote

batladyknows · 6 months

It is rare that a post makes me snigger, but this made me laugh loudly in class and then show my teacher. I think I have risen in her esteem.

silentzed · 6 months

I wish I could give this a thousand upvotes. It happens way more often than it should that I end up the Designated Driver

CarolineTurpentine · 6 months

I hate people who go to parties where there will be copious amounts of alcohol consumed, and then complain about the drunk people. Yes, they are being obnoxious, but if this situation bothers you so much, why do you come? Hang out with your friends when there won't be alcohol, or get sober friends. Either way, stop bitching about it.

Skreeonk · 6 months

Aaaaand cue all the self-righteous teetotalers in the comments in 3 ... 2 ... 1 ...

memwad · 6 months

My man and I are both straightedge.

He likes being the only sober one at the party. Why? In his words: "It's like having super powers. Your brain is sharper than everyone else. Your motor skills are all intact. Your reflexes are faster. MUHAHAHAHHA"

I don't see the point of alcohol. If I want to act like a dumbass in public, I do that out of my own accord. ha.

jxj24 · 6 months

But you also get your choice of passed-out chicks.

EDIT: As in "birds". Because they're OWLS. Jeez.

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