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1230
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Drew Carey Was Once Terrifying (upload.wikimedia.org)

submitted ago by Hryggo

top 200 commentsshow all 258
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[–]SoberPandaren 166 points167 points ago

Put sunglasses on him and he'd look like Duke Nukem.

[–]tronBeardsley 112 points113 points ago

No kidding.

[–]cerebral_ballsy 44 points45 points ago

Hail to the king, baby.

[–]mecharedneck 2 points3 points ago

I think he looks like Sean Astin from Encino Man.

load more comments (2 replies)

    [–]fcap8987 36 points37 points ago

    I was thinking vague resemblance to Guile from Streetfighter.

    [–]renegadeofunk 17 points18 points ago*

    Dolph Lundgren for me.

    Edit: Also the 'Son, I am disappoint' guy.

    [–]docblue 14 points15 points ago

    come on down!... I must break you.

    [–]neekneek 1 point2 points ago

    Go home and be a family man!

    [–]KoalaBomb 6 points7 points ago

    Here you go.

    [–]Professor_Gushington 2 points3 points ago

    Woah... ytmnd still exists?!

    [–]alrightandrew 2 points3 points ago

    The Guile theme is the auditory equivalent of bacon: it goes with everything.

    [–]LinuxLeafFan 2 points3 points ago

    Lol for creating something on long dead website

    [–]HazeCore 0 points1 point ago

    Yea, if he had the broom head hair style he's resemble him so much.

    [–]BigNikiStyle 0 points1 point ago

    I totally thought this too!

    [–]ThunderousMaximus 0 points1 point ago

    Go home and be a price is right man.

    [–]nameless88 9 points10 points ago

    Reminds me of Biff Tannen.

    [–]Infidel_Block_Party 5 points6 points ago

    Can someone do this please?

    [–]davidhoey 5 points6 points ago

    Points that don't matter piss me off.

    [–]addedpulp 13 points14 points ago

    You must hate Reddit.

    [–]gindlesberger08 2 points3 points ago

    or this guy http://imgur.com/U9azO

    [–]backfatt 80 points81 points ago

    oh and he also has scored a perfect score of 300 on his physical performance test. 100 situps in 2 minutes, 20 dead hang pull ups and 3 mile run in under 18 minutes. the dude was a beast. the glasses that he made famous were military issue. we called them BCG's or birth control goggles because nobody will bang a man wearing them.

    [–]ablebodiedmango 27 points28 points ago

    Which begs the question, what the fuck happened to him after?

    [–]MetalGearFoRM 48 points49 points ago

    He went funny.

    [–]notanotherpyr0 44 points45 points ago

    It's very hard to keep up the workout regiment you keep when you are in the service when you get out but it's much easier to keep the diet you had to sustain the workouts.

    [–]lotictrance 10 points11 points ago

    Best explanation here, and very true by most accounts. You get accustomed to taking-in the calories you need as a Marine/serviceman, but once the workout's gone, it's a bit of a problem.

    [–]EyebrowZing 4 points5 points ago

    Yup. I used to run my ass off all day at work and carry bombs and missiles (6531) around. Then I EAS'd got married, and went back to school. Now my wife feeds me constantly, and I sit at a desk all day, and have never weighed as much in my life. I've only been out eight months and can barley run fast enough for a PFT now.

    [–]ShitOnYourMom 2 points3 points ago

    That happened to a lot of baseball and softball players I knew from college. My friends who are swimmers, soccer players, etc. still find the time to easily run or practice their sport in pickup games and gyms, but the guys who played baseball fattened up because baseball itself isn't what keeps you fit. It's the workouts and behind-the-scenes action.

    [–]Crimyote 17 points18 points ago

    I know a lot of former military people that just let themselves go once they leave. Including a former Army Ranger, looking at him today you would have never guessed.

    [–]OuttaSpec 12 points13 points ago

    So true. Former Marine, 0311 infantry as well as a designated marksman (kinda like a sniper without all the bragging rights) and about 5 years after I got out I was able to bend light with my mass alone.

    The good news is I lost a ton of weight and in about 20 more pounds I'll be back to my discharge weight.

    [–]infidel78 3 points4 points ago

    Thats awesome man. I was 6173 (air crew for a CH 53) so pt was always kinda a...second priority, but I still ran about 250-260 on every PFT I took. I really got into running after I got out and then crossfit, so I weigh roughly the same as I did when I separated only I am in muchhh better shape overall 7.5 years after I got out (also quit smoking, which helps)

    [–]poccorocco2 6 points7 points ago*

    What was his main pastime on the show? Beer. Which coincidentally does that sort of thing to most marines.

    [–]AngryData 2 points3 points ago

    It happens to a lot of people who do a lot of physical activity for work. It is easy to stop doing a massive amount fo work when you quit or leave but hard to lower your food intake to a tiny part of what you were eating before. You feel hungry all the time otherwise even though you arent using the calories.

    [–]dedzone2k 0 points1 point ago

    Hard to eat right and exercise when you're on the road, staying up late nights doing shows, eating diner food and drinking with your other comedian friends, who also have poor eating and dietary habits.

    [–]backfatt 0 points1 point ago

    food and no exercise would be my guess

    load more comments (1 reply)

      load more comments (2 replies)

        [–]tonywartooth 53 points54 points ago*

        He will break you so bad the rules of physics will be made up and your joints won't matter.

        [–]sarcasticobserver 22 points23 points ago

        Welcome to your murder, where the implements are made up and the screams don't matter.

        [–]Infidel_Block_Party 61 points62 points ago

        Marine Corps Reserve from 1980-1986

        [–]KingofSuede -1 points0 points ago

        That would have been Really long hair for an active Marine.

        [–]Infidel_Block_Party 14 points15 points ago*

        These are the current USMC Grooming Standards. I can only imagine they were less strict in the 1980's.

        Hair will be neat and closely trimmed. The hair may be clipped at the edges of the side and back; will be evenly graduated from zero length at the hairline in the lower portion of the head to the upper portion of the head; and will not be over 3 inches in length fully extended on the upper portion of the head; the back and sides of the head below the hairline may be shaved to remove body hair. Sideburns will not extend below the top of the orifice of the ear. Sideburns will not be styled to taper or flare. The length of an individual hair of the sideburn will not exceed 1/8 inch when fully extended.

        Head hair will be styled so as not to interfere with the proper wear of uniform headgear. Hair which protrudes from beneath properly worn headgear in an unsightly manner is considered excessive, regardless of length.

        No male Marine will be required to have his hair clipped to the scalp except while he is undergoing recruit training or when such action is prescribed by a medical officer. This does not prohibit a male Marine from having his hair clipped to the scalp if he so desires.

        http://usmilitary.about.com/cs/marines/a/usmcgrooming.htm

        EDIT - Format

        [–]Crimyote 6 points7 points ago

        I automatically read this in the voice of R. Lee Ermy as gunnery sergeant Hartman.

        [–]Kesslerjfox 3 points4 points ago

        Also known as the normal speaking voice of R. Lee Ermy

        [–]Big_Oil 2 points3 points ago

        I was in the Marine Corps from 1985-1989. The standards were the same. That's not a Jarhead haircut...at least not an Active Duty one.

        [–]Infidel_Block_Party 6 points7 points ago

        In the Corps 2005-2011. I can say I have had my hair pretty close to this, especially on deployment. High and tights aren't for everyone!

        load more comments (2 replies)

          [–]KingofSuede 0 points1 point ago*

          You may be a great barracks lawyer, but that hair's still a shaggy mess compared to the ubiquitous high and tight. ;)

          [–]darkhorseguns 3 points4 points ago

          Not really. I had hair longer than that on active duty. A nice gauge of hair length was to take your ID card and measure the hair along the vertical axis of the card. If the hair was longer, it was out of regs.

          [–]cfuse 147 points148 points ago

          Drew Carey was once terrifying hot.

          What? Some of us are into that.

          [–]superevie 72 points73 points ago

          I came here to say the same thing. He was a total babe. I'd let him take me places, look tough, separate me from my friends and family, and knock me up. Or something.

          [–]jax9999 34 points35 points ago

          me too, and i'm a guy

          [–]Alexanderh86 8 points9 points ago

          Thanks for the boner...

          [–]kiwi_goalie 13 points14 points ago

          My mother once told me that my fiance looks like Drew Carey, but not fat. I didn't see it. Then I saw this picture.

          ...Yeah, I can see it now! Upvotes for you for having good taste :P

          [–]Kickendekok 3 points4 points ago

          Prove it!

          [–]kiwi_goalie 16 points17 points ago

          He's a private person. It'd feel disrespectful to put his picture on the internet when I know he wouldn't like it.

          Plus, he's mine! All mine!

          [–]Shocking 3 points4 points ago

          Fine...fine we'll take a pic of you instead.

          [–]lotictrance 0 points1 point ago

          Seems like he's got himself a catch :)

          [–]goldgecko4 3 points4 points ago

          Seriously. He looks like either a GI Joe character, or failing that a sergeant in a 1980s war movie.

          [–]CodeOfKonami 47 points48 points ago

          He looks like the oldest son on Home Improvement.

          [–]Infidel_Block_Party 11 points12 points ago

          Funny you should say this as Drew Carey did a cameo on Home Improvement

          [–]Roninspoon 106 points107 points ago

          That is not funny.

          [–]addedpulp 31 points32 points ago

          Funny you should say this

          is not the same as

          Funny thing,

          [–]fuckyoubarry 1 point2 points ago

          What you said, is funny. Is funny you should say that.

          [–]slyyboogy 58 points59 points ago

          Look at the resemblance!

          [–]blakerboy777 7 points8 points ago

          So I finally realized that's hair at the top and not a guy whose head is a paper bag. Wtf

          [–]PeptoDysmal 2 points3 points ago

          hahahahahaha holy shit, I will never be able to unsee this now.

          [–]phliuy 0 points1 point ago

          send this man higher

          [–]Le_Madmaxxx 17 points18 points ago

          Biff!

          [–]soccerlionheart 14 points15 points ago

          Anyone ever read any of his books? In one of them he tells a story about how he almost killed a drunk friend of his who had been getting on his nerves by pushing him out of a window....that's terrifying :/

          [–]HayfieldHick 13 points14 points ago

          Dirty jokes and Beer is a great book of his. It's where this photo was taken from.

          [–]cjhelms 2 points3 points ago

          I'm a huge fan of the "My dick is so big" jokes chapter. Rolling on the floor!

          [–]HayfieldHick 2 points3 points ago

          My dick is so big, it has it's own dick. And my dick's dick... is bigger than your dick.

          [–]cjhelms 0 points1 point ago

          YES!

          [–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

          That is awesome.

          [–]Shitty_Watercolour 144 points145 points ago

          http://shittywatercolour.com/post/20018276822

          [–]I_DRINK_PERIOD_BLOOD 39 points40 points ago

          Again, not shitty enough. You need to suppress your talent a little more if you want to stay in character.

          [–]I_RAPE_PEOPLE_II 46 points47 points ago

          We need a video of you drinking period blood as proof.

          [–]Gad001 15 points16 points ago

          haha it's funny because 90% of what I_DRINK_PERIOD_BLOOD says is serious (as said so by him, himself, earlier). Also, he LOVES when you comment about something involving his name.

          [–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

          I saw him say that, too. I spend way too much time on this fucking site.

          [–]El-Babirusa 3 points4 points ago

          I need a video of you raping people.

          [–]LogicalAce 1 point2 points ago

          Don't forget the conditioner bottle. The shoe will be waived this once.

          [–]Ragnrok 2 points3 points ago

          We're gonna need a video of you... you know... for proof.

          Also, let's get that tater guy in here for some pics.

          [–]I_RAPE_PEOPLE_II 3 points4 points ago

          No, I'm not going to incriminate myself.

          [–]repetitive_comment 2 points3 points ago

          No, I'm not going to incriminate myself.

          [–]fetalbeatle 6 points7 points ago

          I do not have an interesting name, or anything to contribute.

          [–]bocksocks 1 point2 points ago

          I enjoy pecan pie.

          [–]BL0NDEEEEE 1 point2 points ago

          Sounds like somebody's got a case of the mondays :(

          [–]TooSubtle 0 points1 point ago

          Satre.

          [–]BL0NDEEEEE 1 point2 points ago

          I love you

          load more comments (6 replies)

            [–]yesukai 3 points4 points ago

            That website makes up for any lack of shittyness in the watercolor.

            [–]sguitaradam 5 points6 points ago

            Jonah Hill when he was skinny?

            [–]Hryggo[S] -5 points-4 points ago

            I can't upvote this enough.

            load more comments (5 replies)

              [–]SharksInSuits 5 points6 points ago

              He looks like Josh Homme from Queens of the Stone Age

              [–]tonywartooth 9 points10 points ago

              Not drunk enough.

              [–][deleted] ago

              [deleted]

              [–]lotictrance 3 points4 points ago

              Don't forget Major League!

              The first movie to make me realize, as a kid, that:

              a) Cleveland has a baseball team,

              and

              b) Charlie Sheen was funny as hell.

              ninja edit: also, stripping jokes and vodoun-practicing Hatians are also funny, thanks to this movie.

              [–]hobblyhoy 12 points13 points ago

              something was missing..

              [–]danman11 0 points1 point ago

              Perfect!

              [–]jjswee 0 points1 point ago

              Crazy how much more it looks like himself now.

              [–]NewWorldSlacker 4 points5 points ago

              He looks like military Beeker.

              Meep meep, Bang Bang!

              [–]johndeer89 11 points12 points ago

              Did anybody else read Jim Carey and freak out?

              [–]dfn85 1 point2 points ago

              I read Drew Carey, imagined Jim Carey, and wondered how the hell he went from that to what he is now.

              [–]NawNaw 28 points29 points ago

              Come on down...to my basement.

              [–]Teslanaut 2 points3 points ago

              Put the lotion in the basket.

              [–]swordinthesound 22 points23 points ago

              Reddit, where everything's made up and the points dont matter.

              [–]Teslanaut 5 points6 points ago

              Let's play Scenes from a Hat.

              [–]thisissam 2 points3 points ago

              Things you can say to your dog but not your girlfriend.

              [–]Teslanaut 3 points4 points ago

              Come.

              [–]thisissam 0 points1 point ago

              Exactly.

              [–]DrChadKroegerMD 0 points1 point ago

              I killed several drifters in a spree when I was 19. Also I fucked your sister.

              [–]Absurd_Leaf 1 point2 points ago

              You turned my Tuesday into the most awesome day of the week. Thank you.

              [–]Dreadlordstu 1 point2 points ago

              yes this deserves more upvotes

              [–]SlobbishBody 0 points1 point ago

              I only regret that I have but one upvote to give.

              [–]statini 3 points4 points ago

              He still looks terrifying but in a tales from the crypt sorta way

              [–]jax9999 2 points3 points ago

              not terrifying. sexy.

              [–]SoCal2012 10 points11 points ago

              Oorah Devil Dog!

              [–]Battletooth 6 points7 points ago

              I like fat drew better.

              [–]bobaimee 2 points3 points ago

              ...and hot.

              [–]The-Jake-Gatsby 2 points3 points ago

              Definitely Drew Carey or that dude from Trailer Park boys

              [–]Danleyson 3 points4 points ago

              He was a fucking marine. What were you expecting?

              [–]dfn85 4 points5 points ago

              Was Once

              Is still

              [–]formation 1 point2 points ago

              Safety not guaranteed.

              [–]MomoTheCow 1 point2 points ago

              Until he spoke.

              [–]PresidentWhitmore 1 point2 points ago

              I read this as Jim Carrey and I was like "NO FUCKING WAY."

              Then I read it as Drew Carey and I was like "Oh, that makes a hell of a lot more sense."

              [–]Ianbuckjames 1 point2 points ago

              His face kinda reminds me of the guy who did the University of Texas Massacre.

              [–]bobrossisgod 1 point2 points ago

              Im sexually aroused

              [–]EndsAbrupt 1 point2 points ago

              Son, I am

              [–]FlaviaTitus 1 point2 points ago

              Aging sucks.

              [–]shoot_first 1 point2 points ago

              I call bullshit. This doesn't look like Jim Carey at all.

              [–]thieving_magpie 1 point2 points ago

              Young evil Hank Hill

              [–]nabubble 1 point2 points ago

              He's actually really handsome here.

              [–]Desmeister 1 point2 points ago

              Son, I am disappoint.

              [–]GaijinGrl 1 point2 points ago

              He had air wing hair!

              [–]theduckmanz 1 point2 points ago

              Im straight. Id do him

              [–]zenithsonzai 1 point2 points ago

              ... why do you subscribe to a subreddit called gaybros?

              [–]theduckmanz 0 points1 point ago

              LIES

              [–]a_nouny_mouse 1 point2 points ago

              I must break you.

              [–]Koopslovestogame 1 point2 points ago

              hang on a minute ...

              in color ...

              http://www.teenidols4you.com/blink/Actors/ztbryan/ztbryan_1241927764.jpg ( http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0117022/ )

              [–]iplaw 2 points3 points ago

              Wow, looks like Peeta from The Hunger Games.

              [–]lotictrance 0 points1 point ago

              Not true, he didn't paint himself up as a rock, break his leg, and get a serious infection for this shot.

              [–]I_RAPE_PEOPLE_II 2 points3 points ago

              He really let himself go...

              [–]ChetBenning 35 points36 points ago

              And after he was done letting go... HE CAME BACK LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER.

              [–]lotictrance 2 points3 points ago

              Wait, seriously? Has he really lost that much weight?

              If so, fucking congrats to him. That's incredible.

              [–]MrMackay 2 points3 points ago

              Fucking cheater, he's only got one foot on the scale!

              [–]FatNerdGuy 3 points4 points ago

              Yeah that there is fucking dedication.

              [–]Kodiak_Cartel 2 points3 points ago

              And Rachel Maddow was once super hot.

              (She's still cute, but I'm a dude, so Not even in a million years. :( )

              [–]trampus1 22 points23 points ago

              super hot

              Might wanna scale that back a bit.

              [–]ablebodiedmango 8 points9 points ago

              Actually like her better with the short hair... the blonde is just blah

              [–]lotictrance 4 points5 points ago

              I... nah, sorry, I just can't get "super hot" out of that. But to each his own.

              [–]swordinthesound 0 points1 point ago

              She's still hot. Id trade the blonde hair for the brilliant mind any day.

              load more comments (1 reply)

                [–]BoxMacLeod 1 point2 points ago

                His eyes look sad..

                [–]MrAsymo 0 points1 point ago

                He's lacking eyebrows, that should explain it.

                [–]Smug_developer 0 points1 point ago

                He looks like Dolph lundgren from universal soldier

                [–]tonermcfly 0 points1 point ago

                Andrew Guile Carey?

                [–]llama3ater 0 points1 point ago

                What a total badass.

                [–]jvenable2893 0 points1 point ago

                Drew Carey was Frat as Fuck

                [–]SemiProfesionalTroll 0 points1 point ago

                GARAAAAAY BUUUSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

                (MINUS THE TEETH)

                [–][deleted] ago

                [deleted]

                [–]darkhorseguns 0 points1 point ago

                *USMCR

                [–]lurker_for_justice 0 points1 point ago

                Kind of reminds me of Charles Whitman

                [–]Iron_Phoenix 0 points1 point ago

                OOH-RAH Corporal Carey!

                [–]bued07 0 points1 point ago

                I can see an advice animal being born out of this...

                [–]Tacticalknots 0 points1 point ago

                BUT he is also short

                [–]alishainreallife 0 points1 point ago

                Unf.

                [–]mongoOnlyPawn 0 points1 point ago

                Looks like we got an actual bad ass here.

                [–]lactik 0 points1 point ago

                talk about downhill.

                [–]thoekstr 0 points1 point ago

                jack nicklaus?

                [–]dumbgaytheist 0 points1 point ago

                Lol, right... he looks like a gay Ricky Schroeder.

                [–]Jayten 0 points1 point ago

                Drew Tannen.

                [–]GolfVdub2889 0 points1 point ago

                My dad went to high school with him. I'll see if I can dig up the senior yearbook.

                [–]stressed_out_student 2 points3 points ago

                Don't talk about it, just do it.

                [–]madsell 0 points1 point ago

                private pyle?!

                edit: (with hair)

                [–]MisterFiend 0 points1 point ago

                Bobby Hill becomes a man.

                [–]bicuriouschild 0 points1 point ago

                His middle name is also Allison

                [–]fomorian 0 points1 point ago

                In another life he could've been woody harrelson.

                [–]monsieurkiwi 0 points1 point ago

                Then he found a twinkie.

                [–]cvillestorm 0 points1 point ago

                Woody Harrelson? Maybe?

                [–]Alexanderh86 0 points1 point ago

                He was a good looking guy, nohomo.

                [–]slumberday 0 points1 point ago

                That's Drew Carey? That can't be Drew Carey... Drew Carey...

                [–]cats_suck 0 points1 point ago

                sexy*

                [–]De_Angelo 0 points1 point ago

                He get's a bunch of upvotes, but the upvotes don't matter.

                [–]Satherton 0 points1 point ago

                drew carey mobster

                [–]FatFromSpeed 0 points1 point ago

                BAMF

                [–]jonosvision 0 points1 point ago

                He looks bad ass, but how bad ass can you be with the middle name Allison?

                [–]wukev 0 points1 point ago

                Drew Carey is as he has always been: one handsome man.

                [–]austintexascarter 0 points1 point ago

                Still is

                [–]peacebuster 0 points1 point ago

                He still is, but was once, too.

                [–]that_darn_cat 0 points1 point ago

                He looks like someone who survived Chernobyl now which I would classify as much more terrifying than that.

                [–]whowouldnt 0 points1 point ago

                Terrifyingly handsome.

                [–]foxuniform 0 points1 point ago

                And a corporal even worse.

                [–]terrible_similies 0 points1 point ago

                Hugo Stiglitz?

                [–]paramilitarykeet 0 points1 point ago

                Wow. Gorgeous. I wonder why he stopped exercising.

                [–]Slylingual24 0 points1 point ago

                He looks like could play a skinhead in american history x...

                [–]merkuh_thats_why 0 points1 point ago

                He's also a marine

                [–]that_darn_cat 0 points1 point ago

                Give him some sunglasses I feel a Max Headroom comeback!

                [–]soulctcher 0 points1 point ago

                At least you didn't try submitting this to /r/funny.

                [–]humanspace 0 points1 point ago

                Today he is still more terrifying than funny...and he's not very terrifying now.

                [–]Jarl_Walnut 0 points1 point ago

                Now he's skinny as a rail and has a hole in his hand...what a world.

                [–]trampus1 0 points1 point ago

                Nice camouflage, pig. Is that so no one can see you heading back up to the buffet for a 4th serving?

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