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all 42 comments

[–]building_a_moat 61 points62 points ago

Life Protip: Don't do this.

[–]matafubar 12 points13 points ago

Yea, this is the equivalent of putting "Java Expert" on a programming resume. People are going to mess with you and label you a tool.

[–]Stranghill 1 point2 points ago

I don't know anything about programming, and so never intend on putting this on my resume, but why is it specifically such a bad idea?

[–]matafubar 2 points3 points ago

They will see your claim and try to break it. If you say you are any type of expert, they will come up with questions and a bunch of stuff to try to break your confidence. Especially with high-end programming companies like Microsoft and Google. If you say you're an expert in lets say Java, they will have a member of Java's board, or very important members within the Java community (because they have those working for them) interview you and break you in half.

No one is truly an expert so under no circumstances should you ever describe yourself an expert in any field. The key is to be humble, but not the point where you're putting yourself down.

[–]nicvanroon 26 points27 points ago

TAUPE.

[–]Dapwell 6 points7 points ago

DOPE.

[–]PotatoMusicBinge 23 points24 points ago

Killed a hawk with a ninja star

Pics or gtfo

[–]ozpunk 7 points8 points ago

Cold blooded bird killer applying for work at the aviary.

[–]irapeninjas 4 points5 points ago

It was in self defense

[–]Night_Hawk3201 21 points22 points ago

I spent a good minute trying to figure put what is special about "k@gmail.com" I am not a clever man

[–]tmcgr92 4 points5 points ago

...You're not the only one.

[–]bretjamesbitch 3 points4 points ago

You're not the only two.

[–]tallbus1 2 points3 points ago

I also did this >.>

[–]ImTooFluffy 10 points11 points ago

Does your name happen to be Ronald Dvorak?

[–]lolants 6 points7 points ago

Silly rabbits, his name is Roanald Dvorak

[–]bikko 0 points1 point ago*

Hmm, was it intentional they forgot to cover up Roanald's last name at the bottom...?

Edit: AWW SHIT, HE GOT THE JOB!

Edit: AWW SHIT, IT WAS A PRANK BY THE CEO!

[–]watabowtit 1 point2 points ago

[–]roblinx 1 point2 points ago

I was right there with him until he misspelled "taupe"...

[–]Dubbys[!] 0 points1 point ago

Unemployment in your future I see.

[–]Theleftpinky -1 points0 points ago

I really hope he got the job

[–]Voltas 0 points1 point ago

We can see your last name at the bottom FYI Mr Dvorak!

[–]nataliek86 0 points1 point ago

So did you get the job?

[–]reallifesaulgoodman 0 points1 point ago

Funny, even after the ninth time I've seen it on here

[–]MyNameIsBrookeToo 0 points1 point ago

wow I was just going through applications submitted to me earlier this morning, and had this exact thing come through! I was just trying to figure out which co-worker pranked me... Now it gets even more interesting! Which co-worker is a redditor?

[–]vaskemaskine -1 points0 points ago

If you sent me this resume I would not hire you.

[–]reelmusik -1 points0 points ago

And he didn't get the job!!

[–]MrBrawn -1 points0 points ago

People do this so they can say to the Unemployment office that they are actively looking for work. They need to provide a list of all companies applied for when asked to show proof. THey provide joke resumes so they wont get hired and pulled off of Unemployment.

[–]geoffacakes -1 points0 points ago

Doupe!

[–]MrLove2shoot -1 points0 points ago

Because I got High...

[–]studioidefix -1 points0 points ago

Are you applying to Chelsio ?

[–]aziarto -1 points0 points ago

wait is that this aviary you're applying for ?

http://advanced.aviary.com/

[–]Crashri -1 points0 points ago

Not sure if a horrible resume, or just Ronald McDonald

[–]supersaint87 -1 points0 points ago

This reminds me of the application from the football manager gamer for manager at Middlesbrough Football Club which got a great response from the club chairman too.

http://sports.yahoo.com/soccer/blog/dirty-tackle/post/When-a-Football-Manager-player-applied-for-the-M?urn=sow-325075

[–]CatsnaxBard -1 points0 points ago

Am I the only one bothered by the lowercase i on the last line before already?

[–]Goobz24 -1 points0 points ago

Anyone else curious about the Dvorak at the bottom of the page?

[–]Kunks -1 points0 points ago

this looks like tom haverford's resume

[–]evilalien -1 points0 points ago

As old as the internet...

[–]kingofbigmac -2 points-1 points ago

Saying shit all over your resume is fine but you can't say fuck!

[–]ninjahands -2 points-1 points ago

posted this already, but you sir will get an upvote

[–]livenfunky 0 points1 point ago

you sir will get an upvote

Stop.

[–]jvslacker -2 points-1 points ago

sorry this is overdone and old.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]kingofbigmac 3 points4 points ago

He would be much better at it. He wouldn't cuss on it but he would use facts for sure.