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2834
2835

What is this called?! I need to do this. (imgur.com)

submitted ago by kolorone

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[–]bAZtARd 1217 points1218 points ago

I've been on one of these things in near Tonsai Beach in Thailand. The waves were not as high so it didn't shoot you in the air. But you could run along the pier on the wave so you were always running downhill but actually running straight.

Also there was a really hot blonde swimming topless nearby. But that's another story.

[–]hippity_dippity123 968 points969 points ago

You had 2 stories and THIS is the one you chose?

[–]mastersprinkles 865 points866 points ago

You have chosen.... poorly

[–]rand0mstuf 237 points238 points ago

I acknowledge this Indiana Jones reference by upvoting it

[–]mastersprinkles 216 points217 points ago

You have chosen..... wisely

[–]12toedfeet 101 points102 points ago

Only the penitent man shall pass.

[–]ninjaneer76 21 points22 points ago

Who knew Jehovah started with an "I"?!

[–]Ichabod495 7 points8 points ago

Actually that always bugged me, The I was pronounced as a Y and they spelled it IHWH which spells out the tetragrammaton in Latin. You'd think Both the Jones's would know Jehovah is a bad pronunciation.

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          [–]sadface69 20 points21 points ago

          hey guys... i saw boobs once. best day of my life. the end.

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            [–]serrimo 572 points573 points ago

            There's ALWAYS a hot blonde nearby when I don't have my sun glasses on the beach. I call it the proof of God.

            Your move, atheists.

            [–]superatheist95 510 points511 points ago

            stare anyway, fuck social norms.

            [–]Tomoya-kun 993 points994 points ago

            Checkmate... You don't go to a beach nude to not be looked at ;)

            Joke time!

            A man was sun bathing naked at the beach. For the sake of civility, and to keep it from getting sunburned, he had a hat over his privates.

            A women walks past and says, snickering, "If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat."

            He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you weren't so ugly, it would lift itself."

            [–]toymachinesh 307 points308 points ago

            HIYOOOO

            [–]The_drowning_poop 84 points85 points ago

            HIYOOOO

            Fixed

            [–]fordprefect48 56 points57 points ago

            press it repeatedly

            [–]Toorstain 34 points35 points ago

            Wololo!

            [–]humanmanguy 10 points11 points ago

            It sounds like a choir of angels are singing to me

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              [–]hi_yoooo 4 points5 points ago

              Oh noooo.... I'm late to the party :(

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                [–]dghughes 24 points25 points ago

                Someone liked your joke.

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                  [–]JimmyJamesMac 8 points9 points ago

                  Aaaannndddd thats how you creep her into putting her titties away

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                    [–]whitoreo 3 points4 points ago

                    You put your sunglasses on the beach? Why not put them on your head?

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                      [–]dylansesco 135 points136 points ago

                      Another story that desperately needs to be told. With pictures.

                      [–]anthony30542 94 points95 points ago

                      Video will also be accepted.

                      [–]zulfipunk 57 points58 points ago

                      for science...

                      [–]PolishKatie 86 points87 points ago

                      yes, yes. We know.

                      [–]kingbobofyourhouse 75 points76 points ago

                      stop replying and get back to polishing.

                      [–]thinklovedo 26 points27 points ago

                      Stop replying and get back to ruling...your majesty

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                            [–]demonofthefall 2 points3 points ago

                            The waves were not as high

                            You need to better cooordinate your vacations with the tsunamis.

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                              [–]Vaypo 1776 points1777 points ago

                              I'm assuming you just sit on it until the wave comes and then it shoots you in the air like that. If this is the case, I am going to quit my job tomorrow, find the place that has this, and live there.

                              [–]gazow 796 points797 points ago

                              how can we combine this with a slip and slide...

                              [–]C0mmun1ty 339 points340 points ago

                              Combine it with a skateboard or bike and that would be a lot of fun.

                              [–]efg1342 1567 points1568 points ago

                              We could call it "surfing"?

                              [–]Enginerdiest 1544 points1545 points ago

                              Named after the way we found it: surfing the Internet.

                              [–]DLXII 987 points988 points ago

                              http://i.imgur.com/nWvEl.gif

                              [–]RanchWithEverything 214 points215 points ago

                              Fuckin weebay

                              [–]lordlicorice 85 points86 points ago

                              Shut your mouth, Bey is the coolest character on that show >:C

                              [–]RanchWithEverything 133 points134 points ago

                              while bay is top tier, omar and freamon are god tier

                              [–]legba 33 points34 points ago

                              Omar comin' yo!

                              [–]jer21 42 points43 points ago

                              And Prop Joe.

                              [–]RyanoRhino 13 points14 points ago

                              This is fucking weird. Right as I'm reading this thread, the theme from season 4 started playing thanks to WMP's shuffle function. Man that's a tune.

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                                [–]cryosis 26 points27 points ago

                                Bey alright, but he's not Omar.

                                [–]fjellfras 10 points11 points ago

                                He came at the king and he missed (how is that read without the innuendo) ?

                                [–]beardless 9 points10 points ago

                                My word is still my word - whether in here or out there - it'll still be my word that finds you

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                                    [–]illegal_deagle 35 points36 points ago

                                    "That bitch was a narco?!"

                                    [–]BBEnterprises 20 points21 points ago

                                    NAH NAH she look like one of Orlando's hoes

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                                      [–]swantamer 7 points8 points ago

                                      "I need you to take care of my fish, yo."

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                                        [–]Everydayilearnsumtin 78 points79 points ago

                                        I'm assuming you just sit on a chair until the internet comes and then it shoots you in the air like that. If this is the case, my boss is going to fire me today, I'll find a computer that has this, and live there.

                                        [–]Anotherstani 204 points205 points ago

                                        Sorry for posting this in a reply to something irrelevant, but I feel everyone must know this.

                                        True story.

                                        I did a holiday season in Greece a few years ago. One of the beaches we used to take the parties to had a load of watersport activities and one of these things in the OP's picture. After drinking the free booze available to the guests one of the reps drunkenly walked onto the platform and lay down on his front. The waves gently moved the platform with its motion, which opened and closed gaps in between the plastic connection things, as he was lay on his front and wearing board shorts, meaning his tackle was hanging freely, unbeknown to him the tip of his dick fell between the gap and as the gentle current brought the plastic things together, you could hear him scream from the other end of the beach. He subsequently threw up because he was in so much pain.

                                        [–]Paladia 41 points42 points ago

                                        For version 1.1 they should put an elastic rubber layer over it so this doesn't happen.

                                        [–]anonymoustroll 9 points10 points ago

                                        ...or just take those fleshlights that were thrown away en mass a few months ago and stick them in the cracks.

                                        Now, let's see... how can we combine fleshlights with other beach sports?

                                        [–]btgarner 22 points23 points ago

                                        Beach Volleyball is the obvious choice.

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                                            [–]bassistwanted 19 points20 points ago

                                            I call bullshit that it was an accident, that drunk guy was trying to fuck that thing.

                                            [–]HateMeYet 31 points32 points ago

                                            I'm conflicted. I gave you an upvote for relevance but what I really want to do is hunt you down and kill you slowly for putting this image in my head.

                                            [–]Anotherstani 3 points4 points ago

                                            I'm sorry, but when I saw the picture so many memories came flooding back and I had to share the burden.

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                                              [–]jai_kasavin 32 points33 points ago

                                              Was it the frank or the beans?

                                              [–]Anotherstani 10 points11 points ago

                                              I couldn't bear to look, but I know there was blood. My guess is a bit of both.

                                              [–]bigshoop78 19 points20 points ago

                                              How'd you get the beans above the frank?!

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                                                [–]supderpbro 3 points4 points ago

                                                All I heard was that they have one of these in Greece... Is it a national landmark? Are they auctioning it off?

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                                                  [–]feureau 48 points49 points ago

                                                  I'm navigating through the information superhighway!!

                                                  [–]ExdigguserPies 4 points5 points ago

                                                  Let the interwibs be our guide!

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                                                          [–]SkyNTP 4 points5 points ago

                                                          If you make the surface slick, you could ride the wave down the length of this thing. Technically this is surfing, just on a solid surface with no board.

                                                          [–]slipandslide 43 points44 points ago

                                                          you rang?

                                                          [–]Jarrost 16 points17 points ago*

                                                          Lets throw in some sharp objects too.

                                                          [–]Jackpot777 33 points34 points ago*

                                                          To what? Don't leave us hanging!

                                                          EDIT - damn it, man, you corrected the spelling!

                                                          [–]Jarrost 5 points6 points ago

                                                          To the beachballs of course!

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                                                            [–]gazow 10 points11 points ago

                                                            also sharks

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                                                                [–]urinesample 138 points139 points ago

                                                                That's exactly how it works, but seriously, 5 minutes one of those things and you'll get the worst sea-sickness of your life. I was swimming back to shore puking as I swam.

                                                                [–]bic_lighter 257 points258 points ago*

                                                                It's always the swell that gets you.

                                                                I have an iron stomach, never carsick, never sick on a rollercoaster, never airsick etc.

                                                                To this day I have yet to be sea sick but years ago in Fiji I was on a boat and a swell came in on the trip back and for about 1-2 hours it was slowly going UP and downn... UP and down...

                                                                I immediately felt a queasiness that I had never felt before but I took deep breaths and told my self that it would be over soon. Then all the other tourists started barfing into bags whilst I was sitting in the cabin.

                                                                I went out for fresh air with the mind of painting the side of the boat I must have looked as white as a ghost because one of the deckhands came up to me and asked if I was alright and we ended up playing a game where we moved our legs with the swell and somehow I felt a little better.

                                                                So thank you Fijiian man, wherever you are.

                                                                [–]fprintf 306 points307 points ago

                                                                As a lifelong sailor one of the worst places you can be on a boat is inside. Seasickness is primarily one of disorientation between what the eye sees and what the inner ear perceives. When inside a cabin your eye sees a stable world, but your inner ear perceives movement. Looking through a window often doesn't make a difference.

                                                                The only solution to me is to get outside and get a good look at the horizon or anything in the distance that will keep my eyes from focusing on anything nearby (the deck, cabin, mast, stanchions, lines), so that I force my eyes to see that my body really is moving. I've had to go on deck in some of the worst weather just to get some relief. I am told that really experienced off shore sailors get over the seasickness from being inside after a few days, but I never got to that point and always just went outside.

                                                                [–]RoscoeMG 365 points366 points ago

                                                                It's called sensory mismatch. Youre brain thinks you've been poisoned, hence the throwing up.

                                                                [–]sheerheartattack 263 points264 points ago

                                                                I thought I was good at resisting motion sickness. Apparently I am just bad at resisting poison.

                                                                [–]slyphox 141 points142 points ago

                                                                +5 Poison Resistance

                                                                [–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

                                                                Wouldn't it be -5?

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                                                                    [–]pleasefindthis 61 points62 points ago

                                                                    Mind blown, thank you.

                                                                    [–]StinkinFinger 31 points32 points ago

                                                                    Chunks blown.

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                                                                      [–]jonathanrdt 54 points55 points ago

                                                                      That makes so much sense that I cannot believe it isn't common knowledge.

                                                                      [–]ExecutiveChimp 14 points15 points ago

                                                                      I thought it was.

                                                                      [–]isaactology 25 points26 points ago

                                                                      Why cant we just adapt to this shit already humans, fuck.

                                                                      [–]Kage2021 26 points27 points ago

                                                                      For real, let's do away with our hundreds of thousands of years of finely crafted, and largely successful mechanisms for purging poisions and alerting the body to illness...

                                                                      That wouldn't be adaptation, it would be de-evolution.

                                                                      [–]Measlymonkey 7 points8 points ago

                                                                      I love Devo!

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                                                                            [–]charlie_ruggles 68 points69 points ago

                                                                            The cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.

                                                                            [–]weatherwar 40 points41 points ago

                                                                            I'm bringing a tree with me next time I go to sea.

                                                                            [–]McMammoth 56 points57 points ago

                                                                            I got a jar of diiirt, I got a jar of diiirt

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                                                                              [–]bic_lighter 6 points7 points ago

                                                                              Yeah I agree with you mate, the air and outside helped me.

                                                                              I had been on boats plenty of time before, just not so far out at sea. I try to avoid it now cause I know that swell can make me break so easily.

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                                                                                [–]emericuh 31 points32 points ago

                                                                                So thank you Fijiian man, wherever you are.

                                                                                Fiji?

                                                                                [–]rondo7 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                holy christ. i started getting dizzy reading this. My subconsciousness had taken me onboard that boat and the swell hit me. Literally had to divert my eyes away from teh screen!

                                                                                [–]Optimisto1820 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                I was seasick for the first two years in the US Navy. We could roll all day, not a problem. It's the pitch, man, the pitch. Being on a destroyer on the O3 level (CIC), sitting at a console, was the worst. It was just the up and down, it was the big UP, then a small floating down and up, then the big DOWN, a small floating up then down, then a big UP. I think the worst part was the anticipation that the floating part instilled in you.

                                                                                All you want to do is crawl into your rack and sleep, but you have a job to do, so you man up and carry plastic bags in your back pocket, and endure the ridicule from the other sailors.

                                                                                However, I remember that storm in the Pacific, when the seas were 25-30'. By that time, I had pulled through the worst, and was one of a handful that wasn't puking. I spent the next 6 hours on watch tormenting my shipmates. A grand time was had by all.

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                                                                                    [–]perfectprint2 47 points48 points ago*

                                                                                    you would need to put in some effort if you wanted to get any height. use the float as a runway and sprint and launch off it.

                                                                                    edit: seriously, have none of you ever been in the ocean. look at that guy who is lying down. does it look like he is anticipating leaving the mat anytime soon?

                                                                                    [–]kaptainkaos 249 points250 points ago

                                                                                    As an experienced "bow jumper" in my Navy days, let me explain how this works.

                                                                                    Don't think of the wave pushing you up, picture the bottom falling out from under you.

                                                                                    It's all about the timing.

                                                                                    You will need to jump right before the wave reaches its crest, and try to land it (either in the water or the deck of a ship) while both of you are still going down.

                                                                                    If you were to come down while a wave is coming up, it will hurt quite a bit.

                                                                                    If you are on a ship and you land while the ship is coming up to meet you, it might break your legs.

                                                                                    Here is an animated .gif that illustrates how this looks when done correctly.

                                                                                    [–]silly_pineapple 33 points34 points ago

                                                                                    That was one superb quality comment. And on top of that you up'd it with a gif or a sweet-ass (or, if you prefer, ass-)dunk.

                                                                                    Kudos.

                                                                                    What's the best story you have from your Naval days?

                                                                                    [–]Loneytunes 33 points34 points ago

                                                                                    ANSWER HIM

                                                                                    [–]kaptainkaos 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                    Sorry for the delay, had to work...on a boat.

                                                                                    Dead serious about this, if you timed it right, you could actually pull an "Air Jordan" across the enclosed main deck.

                                                                                    Certain types of ships were better suited to bow jumping. If you were on a small ship (i.e. Frigate) it would be dangerous to move about in certain sea states and you would be confined to your rack (bed). I was on a medium sized supply ship which had the benefit of a huge enclosed main deck with 20 ft high ceiling. This main deck ran nearly 3/4 the length of the entire ship and was protected from the weather. It could be blowing like a typhoon outside and we were jogging laps in the inside.

                                                                                    I did a massive leap one time in which I jumped, grabbed an overhead light fixture, flipped upside down, planted my boots on the ceiling, held on for dear life because my timing was off, and finally the next wave I dropped back down, no injuries.

                                                                                    I have many more sea stories pic slightly related.

                                                                                    TL;DR - I left my boot prints on the ceiling, thanks to a large wave.

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                                                                                      [–]StewartKruger 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                      TL:DR

                                                                                      "Take it from this old bow jumping rat.."

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                                                                                        [–]ComradePyro 21 points22 points ago

                                                                                        Waves are pretty good at pushing shit up really fast, you could probably just jump off of it and go flying.

                                                                                        [–]Drail 76 points77 points ago

                                                                                        I could just see myself jumping off a 5 foot wave, it throws me up 10 feet and then the 5 foot wave is moved from underneath me. Suddenly I'm 15 feet in the air and I end up with a broken leg.

                                                                                        [–]retsamaksrepus 45 points46 points ago

                                                                                        I would think you could jump a little to the side maybe?

                                                                                        [–]_Aether 190 points191 points ago

                                                                                        Or double jump like you do in video games.

                                                                                        [–]FartingBob 186 points187 points ago

                                                                                        It amazes me how many people in real life get injured or even killed in situations where a simple double jump would save them.

                                                                                        [–]suddenly_everywhere 29 points30 points ago

                                                                                        it's actually not that hard

                                                                                        [–]sir_nipplington 41 points42 points ago

                                                                                        Just double-tap A.

                                                                                        [–]Yiyomatic 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                        Like this one

                                                                                        [–]Mage_tank 49 points50 points ago

                                                                                        LAND ON YOUR ASS. YOU'LL TAKE NO DAMAGE AND KILL EVERYONE ELSE.

                                                                                        [–]suddenly_everywhere 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                        the only way i know how to play super smash bros, is to use kirby, and float up and down b the entire game... my friends hate me

                                                                                        [–]roysourboy 15 points16 points ago

                                                                                        I think everyone has one of those friends. And yes, we hate you ಠ_ಠ

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                                                                                          [–]retsamaksrepus 23 points24 points ago

                                                                                          PK THUNDER!

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                                                                                            [–]TheMediumPanda 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                            Famous last words.

                                                                                            [–]FANGO 30 points31 points ago

                                                                                            You mean like. . .this?

                                                                                            (that's about a 18-20 foot wave, and he's about 2 board-heights above the top of it, so let's say ~35 feet)

                                                                                            [–]2grafik 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                            those guys on the deadliest catch do that for fun on their boats

                                                                                            [–]spamdog0 50 points51 points ago

                                                                                            Having sailed ships in the Bering Sea, this is some of the best quality entertainment that can be found. You can do it inside the skin of the ship and it's like being in zero gravity. A true artist can jump from one deck, through a hatch and on to the deck above. You can do it topside but you do risk the whole deck-is-no-longer-below-me-and-I'm-gonna-fall-in-the-water thing.

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                                                                                                [–]XenoApe 41 points42 points ago

                                                                                                I've never felt such instant heartache. Studying Criminal Law in an empty library, late at night, and seeing this makes my stomach turn.

                                                                                                [–]DrDjMD 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                Attorney here, crim law pro tip: don't forget that if df is drunk, he can do anything he wants w/out culpability.

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                                                                                                  [–]Groening_References 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                  I'll never get tired of this. I'm going to have my wedding here.

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                                                                                                    [–]PizzaHog 308 points309 points ago

                                                                                                    This picture inspired a need to do this like I've nvr felt before. As far as I can tell they're called floating pontoon bridges. I made an account to post this so plz forgive me if the link doesn't work. There's a bunch of Amazon-esque sites for them, none with a pic as epic as this.

                                                                                                    [–]Bring_dem 176 points177 points ago

                                                                                                    Whoa whoa whoa.... is this a legitimate answer in a reddit thread asking a question?

                                                                                                    Get the fuck out of here, we got stupid jokes to make.

                                                                                                    [–]MrNarc 81 points82 points ago

                                                                                                    Forgive him, he's new.

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                                                                                                      [–]DukeSpraynard 18 points19 points ago

                                                                                                      Thanks for the info, but please quit hogging the pizza.

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                                                                                                        [–]Pudd1nPants 154 points155 points ago

                                                                                                        ask this guy http://paulgrand.photoshelter.com/gallery-image/travel/G00006.0rCbOw5U8/I0000336h4ZjbVls

                                                                                                        [–]rlconkl 40 points41 points ago

                                                                                                        Yup, it's Thailand. Another picture in the original photographer's travel gallery mentions Thailand in the caption. Other nearby pictures reference Bangkok, Phuket, Patong Beach, etc.

                                                                                                        [–]BlueMunky 55 points56 points ago

                                                                                                        Yeah Phuket, lets go swimming.

                                                                                                        [–]RememberWhoYouAre 25 points26 points ago

                                                                                                        Wait up, I have to Patong my bathing suit first.

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                                                                                                            [–]Adios_numero_two 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                            ask tinyeye... oh wait

                                                                                                            [–]tineyeit 38 points39 points ago

                                                                                                            I'm not sure.

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                                                                                                              [–]Cakespeare 768 points769 points ago

                                                                                                              Veronica and I have been trying this new thing called "Jumping" or "Yumping." It might be a soft "J," I'm not really sure, but apparently you just hop in the air for a brief period of time.

                                                                                                              [–]PhotonFlux 187 points188 points ago

                                                                                                              What's that like, Ron?

                                                                                                              [–]Blunt_ 192 points193 points ago

                                                                                                              Well its kinda like.... Gonna find my baby gonna hold her tight...

                                                                                                              [–]Spangly_Donut 117 points118 points ago

                                                                                                              Gonna grab some afternoon delight...

                                                                                                              [–]cjcrashoveride 101 points102 points ago

                                                                                                              My motto's always been when It's right, It's right

                                                                                                              [–]Strongba1 104 points105 points ago

                                                                                                              Why wait until the middle of a cold, dark night?

                                                                                                              [–]Keithy42 91 points92 points ago

                                                                                                              When everything's a little clearer in the light of day.

                                                                                                              [–][deleted] 89 points90 points ago

                                                                                                              Aaand we know the night is always gonna be there anyway...

                                                                                                              [–]MrKas 84 points85 points ago

                                                                                                              Thinkin' of you's workin' up my appetite.

                                                                                                              [–]phi186 89 points90 points ago

                                                                                                              Lookin' forward to a little afternoon delight.

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                                                                                                                [–]BaconCat 17 points18 points ago

                                                                                                                Wheeeeen everything's a little clearer in the light of dayyyy

                                                                                                                [–]phi186 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                                                i feel for you, bacon cat, yours was better but keithy was first, not sure theres any undoing : /

                                                                                                                [–]BaconCat 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                                                Ctrl-Z

                                                                                                                fuck.

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                                                                                                                  [–]logantauranga 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                                                  Narrator: Had George Michael and Lindsay stayed, they might have discovered what Michael and Maeby did— that “Afternoon Delight” was more adult-themed than its innocent melody would have you believe.

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                                                                                                                      [–]torgothegreat 38 points39 points ago

                                                                                                                      Oh Baxter, you know I don't speak spanish!

                                                                                                                      [–]HH_mmm 30 points31 points ago

                                                                                                                      "Baxter, is that you? Bark twice if your in Milwaukee."

                                                                                                                      [–]torgothegreat 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                                                      What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole... wheel of cheese? Heck, I'm not even mad, that's amazing. How bout we get you in your pj's and we hit the hay.

                                                                                                                      [–]BoiledEggs 118 points119 points ago

                                                                                                                      Humping?

                                                                                                                      [–]Lonadar 21 points22 points ago

                                                                                                                      Wet humping

                                                                                                                      [–]TwiceThePriceOfRice 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                                                      Cakespeare, I'd like to extend to you an invitation to the pants party.

                                                                                                                      [–]johnkong 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                                      I don't understand this thread.

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                                                                                                                        [–]atlasc1 79 points80 points ago

                                                                                                                        It's a modular floating dock: http://www.candock.com/

                                                                                                                        We have them all over the place here. I wouldn't want to hit it on my way back down, though; it's made of hard plastic.

                                                                                                                        [–]glitterthief 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                                                        and where is here?

                                                                                                                        [–]SantiagoAndDunbar 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                        nebraska

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                                                                                                                          [–]d4nace 405 points406 points ago

                                                                                                                          It's call bricklebracking and back in my day kids used to jump fourteen feet in the air after walking 27 miles in the snow in their sandals to get to the beach and gas was only 5c a gallon and later we'd go see a talkie.

                                                                                                                          [–]Bellemy 129 points130 points ago

                                                                                                                          ...I had an onion tied to my belt, because it was the style at the time

                                                                                                                          [–]crazymnm 79 points80 points ago*

                                                                                                                          Gimme five bees for a quarter, you'd say.

                                                                                                                          [–]Horst665 25 points26 points ago

                                                                                                                          Back then nickles had pictures of bumble bees on them

                                                                                                                          [–]Sunlis 27 points28 points ago

                                                                                                                          Petroleum would cost papa dickety-three cents a gallon! We couldn't use the word twenty, you see, because the french had stolen it from us in the war of the Old Republic. So we had to replace it with "dickety" until we won "twenty" back from them on the fields of Hyrule.

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                                                                                                                              [–]IMasturbateToMyself 163 points164 points ago

                                                                                                                              Grandpa did you forget to take your meds again?

                                                                                                                              [–]iLEZ 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                                              Made me google.

                                                                                                                              [–]ibisum 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                              Pffft, you kids and your onions.

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                                                                                                                                [–]IamWiddershins 37 points38 points ago

                                                                                                                                This would be really good with a big-wheel skateboard.

                                                                                                                                Surfing... on land... on the water.

                                                                                                                                [–]mySTASH 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                whoa dude

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                                                                                                                                  [–]kolorone[S] 348 points349 points ago

                                                                                                                                  I believe I found it! http://www.oceanpontoon.com/floating-platform/784064.html

                                                                                                                                  [–]Maebari 94 points95 points ago

                                                                                                                                  We sell Pontoon and Pontoon Accessories

                                                                                                                                  [–]JudgeWhoAllowsStuff 38 points39 points ago

                                                                                                                                  But dad, aren't traditional single-hulled watercraft better than pontoons?

                                                                                                                                  [–]mr-peabody 29 points30 points ago

                                                                                                                                  Dang it, Bobby

                                                                                                                                  [–]goodjobkitty 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                                                                  I just kept waiting for it to move. Too much anticipa

                                                                                                                                  [–]duke_of_derpington 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                                                                  tion

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                                                                                                                                      [–]greenjelibean 364 points365 points ago

                                                                                                                                      Nice Try, Ocean Pontoon.

                                                                                                                                      [–]suchanoob 40 points41 points ago

                                                                                                                                      yes it is. this thing is now in my top 10 list to buy when i get rich

                                                                                                                                      [–]MonkeyCrumpets 122 points123 points ago

                                                                                                                                      when

                                                                                                                                      lol

                                                                                                                                      [–]kwikthroabomb 36 points37 points ago

                                                                                                                                      Hope is a cruel, cruel mistress.

                                                                                                                                      [–]suchanoob 21 points22 points ago

                                                                                                                                      alright, alright... "if".

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                                                                                                                                        [–]sarcasticmrfox 23 points24 points ago

                                                                                                                                        Capitalism still works I see.

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                                                                                                                                            [–]RioTheDragonMan 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                                                            found a video of the one from the picture

                                                                                                                                            [–]249ba36000029bbe9749 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                                                                            This one: http://www.oceanpontoon.com/floating-platform/view_784083_146745.html looks like a Mario course waiting to happen.

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                                                                                                                                              [–]bicarb 36 points37 points ago

                                                                                                                                              Photo taken in Phuket, Thailand and belongs to this guy.

                                                                                                                                              Read description and comments for more info.

                                                                                                                                              [–]NeilOhighO 32 points33 points ago

                                                                                                                                              That's called "Docking" and you can easily go on to Craigslist and post to find plenty of people who are into it!

                                                                                                                                              [–]lefty_82 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                                                                              It's a trap!!!

                                                                                                                                              [–]mightycow 228 points229 points ago

                                                                                                                                              Looks like a compound fracture of the C4 and C5 vertebrae.

                                                                                                                                              [–]telephonepiano 126 points127 points ago

                                                                                                                                              A compound fracture seems pretty unlikely. Compound means the bone fragments are exposed to the environment. ie, their neck is ripped open, wont typically happen with blunt trauma like this.

                                                                                                                                              I think you mean comminuted which means several fragments or 'shattered.'

                                                                                                                                              [–]Blunt_ 67 points68 points ago

                                                                                                                                              DUH.

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                                                                                                                                                [–]mattindustries 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                                                                ...and leaves you in explosive pain?

                                                                                                                                                [–]Poonchow 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                                                                That's the best kind of pain.

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                                                                                                                                                  [–]BinfordsTool 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                                                                  Remember kids, C3, C4, and C5 keep the diaphragm alive!

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                                                                                                                                                    [–]taint_me 48 points49 points ago

                                                                                                                                                    The disembodied feet in the front of the picture is freaking me out. All I can think of is that the person is being devoured by a shark. This is why I don't go in the ocean. I'm fat and would make quite a meal for a shark.

                                                                                                                                                    [–]Sir_Von_Tittyfuck 21 points22 points ago

                                                                                                                                                    Oh my god, how did I not notice them.

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                                                                                                                                                      [–]Shitty_Haikus 88 points89 points ago

                                                                                                                                                      You know what'd be cool?

                                                                                                                                                      Is if someone photo shopped

                                                                                                                                                      Those feet everywhere.

                                                                                                                                                      [–]Magzter 33 points34 points ago

                                                                                                                                                      What the fuck, I didn't even notice those feet until you pointed it out.

                                                                                                                                                      [–]Sqorck 100 points101 points ago*

                                                                                                                                                      PNG for easy placement.

                                                                                                                                                      Example

                                                                                                                                                      [–]trampus1 65 points66 points ago

                                                                                                                                                      I like it

                                                                                                                                                      [–]PureFlame 40 points41 points ago

                                                                                                                                                      So do I...

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                                                                                                                                                          [–]gmcannon 17 points18 points ago

                                                                                                                                                          Those squares are rubber cubes that interlock to form any dock shape you would want. They are also strong, boyant and flexible enough for a small boat or jet ski to drive up on and dry dock. I am assuming in this picture they assembled one of these docks where there was shore break and waited for waves to come in and snake the dock, the material is flexible and strong enough for a boat so I can imagine it'd flex to the curvature of a wave.

                                                                                                                                                          [–]YeaISeddit 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                                          We had one of those at my high school. Jet skiers would often use it as a ramp. Unfortunately, this would break the plastic tiles. God-forbid you happen to step on one of the broken ones. You can get pretty deep cuts when your foot gets sucked in. After a while our instructor (one of the most bad-ass people I've ever known) would start firing flares over the jetskiers or go after them in her chase boat.

                                                                                                                                                          [–]WoolyWombatWinking 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                                                          Your high school had jet skis and chase boats? Where did you go to school and how much does it cost to live there?

                                                                                                                                                          [–]YeaISeddit 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                                          We didn't have jetskis. We did have windsurfing boards, sailboats, crew boats, kayaks, and SCUBA equipment. It was free of charge, a public magnet called MAST Academy. In hindsight I don't believe there is another high school in the United States I would have rather gone to.

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                                                                                                                                                            [–]trashjuice 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            The floatation product is called "CanDock" http://www.candock.com/ which is a modular dock product that has inherent flexibility in the face of wave energy. Pretty cool stuff--very durable, easily reconfigured. About $45 per cell--so you're looking at around $8000 of CanDock in this photo.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]Withnails 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            It's called a food delivery system for sharks. YOU CRAZY MOTHERFUCKERS!

                                                                                                                                                            [–]Cickle_Funts 17 points18 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            It's called 'being outside'.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]legendaris 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            Or something like this. You know, just sayin'

                                                                                                                                                            [–]DevourerOfCookies 6 points7 points ago*

                                                                                                                                                            this photo is in Thailand, it says so on the photographers website

                                                                                                                                                            Edit: also is this held in place at the end by something, or ropes from the bottom to the sea floor maybe? i'm slowly hashing out a summer plan for Florida tourists.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]TastyAnimal 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            I want to have sex on one of those.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]Loggerdon 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            I want to go to there.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]slash2009 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            Shark food

                                                                                                                                                            [–]Cdub_surf 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            It's a JetDock. Try www.jetdock.com.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]AquaFox 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            It's called a jump.

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