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top 200 commentsshow all 254

[–]SirRosie 432 points433 points ago

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Oh hi Mark!

[–]Jakooboo 130 points131 points ago

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YOU ARE TEARING ME APART LISA.

[–]DecidesShit 22 points23 points ago

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You'll be fine, Peter.

[–]UUijs 7 points8 points ago

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Keep your opinions in your pocket!

[–]TinyEarl 48 points49 points ago

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How's your sex life?

[–]HOBOBEAR 11 points12 points ago

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I can't tell you.. it's confidential.

[–]ArcticSpaceman 7 points8 points ago

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Aha, you must be kidding, aren't you?

[–]what_a_story_mark 59 points60 points ago

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hahaha, what a story mark.

[–]Dom328 3 points4 points ago

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Niiiiice.

[–]novelty_scorecard 13 points14 points ago

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7/10

[–]SirRosie 4 points5 points ago

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[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]bitch_im_a_lion 6 points7 points ago

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Hmm?

[–]lud1120 1 point2 points ago

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Read your name as "Splooshsimba" for a second there.

[–]fyiiamaspy 34 points35 points ago

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Oh Hi Puppy!

[–]Calagan 46 points47 points ago

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You are my favorite customer.

[–]ANAL_SHREDDING 16 points17 points ago

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You're cheating on me?

[–]halloni 38 points39 points ago

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You're TEARING me apart, ANAL_SHREDDING!

[–]ArcticSpaceman 4 points5 points ago

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slow clap

[–]tmc_throwaway 11 points12 points ago

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I'm fed up with this woourld.

[–]moarroidsplz 5 points6 points ago

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waorld

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Hi doggy!

FTFY

[–]m1rado 12 points13 points ago

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You're tearing me apart, Lisa!

[–]MarinP 68 points69 points ago

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Fuck! What curse has fallen upon me! Why do you haunt me POTATO_IN_MY_ANUS why?! What do you want from me? In every single fucking thread I dare to enter you're waitng for me, upvoted and ready! Why? Why do you fuck with me POTATO_IN_MY_ANUS why do you fuck with my mind hole!? Leve me alone! Let my people go!

[–]DropsTheMic 27 points28 points ago

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If you had smeared Santorum on your door post like your people had warned you, during Passover this pestilence would have passed you by.

[–]xBADxBITCHx 3 points4 points ago

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POTATO_IN_MY_ANUS why do you fuck with my mind hole!?

I'm not sure that's the hole he's after.

[–]bugs_bunny_in_drag 2 points3 points ago

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what if MarinP has his head up his ass

[–]PsychicHouseHunter 7 points8 points ago

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Hahaha, what a story POTATO_IN_MY_ANUS!

[–]autocorrector 2 points3 points ago

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Pointing out the disparity in sincerity between a comment and a commenter?

Oh you.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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I think it's a bit more than that. POTATO_IN_MY_ANUS is the new andrewsmith1986. If not the same.

[–]weazly 3 points4 points ago

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We should throw some football together

[–]fripletister 4 points5 points ago

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Okay, but only if we do it in a space less than 6 sq ft in size.

[–]XenoX101 1 point2 points ago

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Sure just let me get my tuxedo

[–]PartyMark 2 points3 points ago

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Hi

[–]McLaughlin180 2 points3 points ago

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Hello

[–]Typhus666 8 points9 points ago

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Good to see there is still plenty Room in this post

[–]anicid 7 points8 points ago

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And you don't even have to spoon through the comments to find it.

[–]Plasmaman 3 points4 points ago

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Came here for this. Was not disappointed.

[–]Evanz111 0 points1 point ago

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God dammit, I was just about to be clever and post that but the Reddit community is apparently much wiser than I thought! You win this time...

[–]bowlnoodlez 0 points1 point ago

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Keep your stupid comments in your pocket!

[–]chrisc098 150 points151 points ago

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This looks like a set up for a Dream Works Cars rip off. Mark is the plucky semi that is just happy hauling cargo and seeing the beautiful scenery, until Dark Queen of the Road and her gang of no goods steal his shipment. His only hope to repay the money that he owes is to enter the World Hauling Competition, where he eventually comes head to head with Dark Queen. Through determinedness, hard work, and the help of some whacky side kicks, he manages to win and is the king of the world, but turns it all down and returns to his simply life of hauling cargo, learning that you don't have to be a big shot to be happy in life. I approached Zach Galiafinakis to voice Mark and he seemed very open to it.

[–]phlippo 27 points28 points ago

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Yes and yes. If you can invest two more minutes of your precious time, please tell us about the side kicks. Every good plot needs at least one good side kick. Also please tell me if one of the trucks dies.

Thank you!

[–]turtleshelf 43 points44 points ago

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Arnold, a livestock hauling truck, that used to be a big hauler (nearly number 1) and is embarassed by and angry because of his new role.
He finds it undignified.
Three of his cows are also side characters: Betty, Paul and Henriette.
In the final big conflict, him and his cows, working together for the first time, play a pivotal role in the outcome.
He goes back to his old job with his head held high, and with three new best friends.

[–]Spelter 8 points9 points ago

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Fund it!

[–]runtheplacered 2 points3 points ago

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Marry me!

[–]McGrude 0 points1 point ago

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Paul? As a name for a cow?

[–]turtleshelf 0 points1 point ago

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she's confused.

[–]hired_goon 1 point2 points ago

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I would see this movie three times in a row.

[–]abundantplums 2 points3 points ago

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Determinedness?

[–]Bypass814 7 points8 points ago

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I'm assuming it took determination to figure out a different word, such as determinedness.

[–]RTaynn 1 point2 points ago

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Determinedidity?

[–]hired_goon 0 points1 point ago

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I was more concerned about the "whacky" sidekicks.

[–]chrisc098 0 points1 point ago

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[–]chrisc098 0 points1 point ago

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[–]Bitter_Idealist 77 points78 points ago

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Mark kinda looks like a stormtrooper.

[–]Alsoghieri 31 points32 points ago

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Aren't you a little truck-shaped to be a stormtrooper?

[–]madcatlady 17 points18 points ago

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Queen looks like Darth's helmet.

[–]scrimsims 1 point2 points ago

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Yeah I thought that was what I was supposed to be looking at at first.

[–]DinoDuckROAR 0 points1 point ago

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That's what I was thinking!!!

[–]Se7en_Sinner 117 points118 points ago

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Worst. Autobot name. Ever.

[–]ltd_ed 76 points77 points ago

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My dad's name is Mark, and he could beat up your dad

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Slinger17 10 points11 points ago*

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My first name is John and my middle name is Wayne and I could take both of your dads easily

[–]alamandrax 20 points21 points ago

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Is your last name Gacy?

[–]Slinger17 16 points17 points ago

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That depends. Do you like clowns?

[–]alamandrax 2 points3 points ago

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Not particularly.

[–][deleted] ago*

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[deleted]

[–]GriffGriff 6 points7 points ago*

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...and then I had a sad

I still have it...that feel of sad

[–]Ikimasen 3 points4 points ago

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Uh, ten bucks on John Wayne, then.

[–]0l01o1ol0 0 points1 point ago

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Is your last name Bobbit?

...Oh wait, probably not.

[–]PureClass 3 points4 points ago

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This man is right, my dad's name is Optimus Prime and Mark beat the shit out of him once.

[–]cefriano 20 points21 points ago

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To be fair, The Queen of the Road is a pretty bad name for an Autobot, too.

[–]lostNcontent 41 points42 points ago

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Dark Queen of the Road.

[–]cefriano 43 points44 points ago

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Well now we're treading into Decepticon territory.

[–]jakemyers7 30 points31 points ago

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oh fuck off i saw what you did there you purposely left out dark waiting for someone to correct you so you could say that...you're a fucking genius

[–]EvMund 9 points10 points ago

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Well you're just the regular old genius aren't you

[–]jakemyers7 6 points7 points ago

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I know we just met and im usually really shy but would you go to prom with me, i dont have much money and the tickets are expensive so....im gonna need about tree fiddy

[–]EvMund 3 points4 points ago

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How very brave of you

[–]Moldybread999 1 point2 points ago

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Touched for the very first time

[–]Honestfun12 1 point2 points ago

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Touchèd for the very first time

[–]cefriano 0 points1 point ago

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:D

[–]digitalhuxley 14 points15 points ago

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Mark doesn't have ceremony, nor does he have time for theatre. There is no need for pretence or artifice with Mark. He simply goes by his name, as it's enough for him. I come away from this thinking Mark is happy being Mark, and doing what Mark does.

[–]2grafik 9 points10 points ago

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"Riders of asphalt! What news from the Mark?"

[–]F_Scott_Fitzawesome 0 points1 point ago

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"What business do a Corvette, a Mustang and a Mini Cooper have in the Ridder-Mark?"

[–]2grafik 0 points1 point ago

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maybe a new top gear challenge?, re enact lord of the rings... with cars

[–]evl4evr 9 points10 points ago

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oh Mark, you will have your day

[–]Jisaw 8 points9 points ago

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One day, when all the other trucks have failed to deliver the medicine, Mark will pull through.

[–]ModestCamel 4 points5 points ago

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I love you if that was a Balto reference

[–]dodecahedonist 2 points3 points ago

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Motherfucking Balto was the best movie ever

[–]marktheother 1 point2 points ago

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Every day is my day.

[–]PartyMark 0 points1 point ago

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Soon...

[–]trollingston 24 points25 points ago

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He will also accept Super Thing, Thing King, Kid Dynamite, Chocolate THUN-DA, or ben.

[–]methodamerICON 2 points3 points ago

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It's a thing thing, you wouldn't understand.

[–]waydowninside 8 points9 points ago

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It looks like Darth Vader and a Storm Trooper. Luke Skywalker disguised himself as a Storm Trooper in Episode IV. Mark Hamill was Luke Skywalker. Mark Hamill is driving the white truck. Which means James Earl Jones is driving the black truck. Which means James Earl Jones is The Dark Queen of the Road....

[–]abbiistabbii 8 points9 points ago

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Dark Queen of the Road.

In place of a Dark Lord you shall have a Queen! Not Dark but beautiful and terrible as the dawn! TREACHEROUS AS THE SEA! ALL SHALL LOVE ME AND DESPAIR.

[–]wafety 6 points7 points ago

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They told me I could be anything. So I became a truck.

Well I didn't, but some other Mark apparently did.

[–]captainofindustry 4 points5 points ago

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Very Gary Larson-eque.

[–]iamesauce 23 points24 points ago

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Don't worry, he's just Marking his territory.

I'll be here all week, folks!

[–]SolomonGomes 5 points6 points ago

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Should I try the fish?

[–]FETUS_IN_MY_ANUS 6 points7 points ago

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Speaking of fish... Have you ever thought about how many kinds of fish there are and the names of those fish?

[–]LtDarien 0 points1 point ago

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Trout.

[–]F_Scott_Fitzawesome 0 points1 point ago

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These _IN_MY_ANUS accounts are getting out of hand.

[–]lookitsmarc 1 point2 points ago

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Not so good, Al.

[–]MuteSecurity 21 points22 points ago

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no but seriously, what's funny about this? i'm lost like a fart in a blizzard. i read through all the comments and i'm still confused as shit.

[–]rhubarbcrumble 32 points33 points ago

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I think it's just the juxtaposition between the majestic name of Lorry 1, compared with the average human name 'Mark' of Lorry 2 that is amusing - or at least that's what made me laugh

[–]GinDeMint 5 points6 points ago

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To me, "Lorry" will always be the most whimsical sounding term from the non-US Anglosphere.

[–]Learnincurve 1 point2 points ago

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Old British children's tongue twister; say "Red lorry yellow lorry" ten times out loud.

[–]HonoraryMancunian 1 point2 points ago

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To this day I have never found a more difficult tongue twister and is the only one I can't do with practise.

[–]EvMund 1 point2 points ago

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red lorry yellow lorry red lellow rory- FUCK

[–]SolKool 1 point2 points ago

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Mark doesn't give a truck about fancy names.

[–]Methadose 0 points1 point ago

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Indeed, one can tell by the aesthetics that these are lorries we're dealing with. Seems to be a good amount of truck threads popping up in the last few weeks.

[–]zeekar 7 points8 points ago

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It's basically a (presumably unplanned) RL example of Aerith and Bob. (Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Browser Tabs warning: TVTropes link.)

[–]tizenkotoko 2 points3 points ago

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Not soap, RADIO!

[–]RaindropBebop 5 points6 points ago

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I didn't know Saab makes trucks.

[–]RoadToSurfdom 17 points18 points ago

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It's a Scania. They used to be called Saab-Scania until they split the car and truck company. They then both kept the logo with some differences. The griffin is from the coat of arms of the province of Skåne, Scania in latin. So it doesn't make sense anymore that Saab uses it really.

[–]nzhamstar 1 point2 points ago

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Scanias ftmfw... I don't remember seeing any on Ice Road Truckers tho...

[–]newbe321 7 points8 points ago

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If you got an Scania on Ice Road Truckers, it would be boring. Engine would start every day, put on some good tires and it would go up all the hills with on problem. Get one with opticruice and you would need to gear. Who would like to watch that? Haha. Let the americans have their old fashion trucks :)

[–]nzhamstar 1 point2 points ago

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lol

[–]TheFlyingFinn 2 points3 points ago

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Dunno if Scania is a big brand in the states? Popular truck brands in europe are Scania, Volvo, MAN, Mercedes, DAF and Renault. The only one of these I've seen in american movies or series are Volvo trucks. American truckers seems to like their Peterbilts?

[–]nzhamstar 1 point2 points ago

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Yea Peterbuilt, Kenworth, Western Star...

[–]hatchke 0 points1 point ago

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Scania isn't big in the states, my father is with Scania USA.. company of ~ 5-6 people. Most of their business here involves marine engines.

[–]Kasuli 12 points13 points ago

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Well they don'tt anymore, do they? :p That's actually not a Saab truck either, it's Scania. Saab and Scania merged in 1968 and split in 1995, and apparently both kept the logo.

[–]lxm 1 point2 points ago

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Saab make fighter jets too, and they make the AT4 Rocket launcher. Bam.

[–]RaindropBebop 1 point2 points ago

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I didn't know they made the AT-4. They also made the Carl-gustav and the LAW.

Bad ass.

[–]Kungafsand 4 points5 points ago

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SAAB Automobiles is the name of that company the makes cars. SAAB started out making airplanes, the cars, then Trucks. All these things belong to separate companies today. And SAAB automobiles went in the drain recently.

[–]RaindropBebop 1 point2 points ago

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Thank you for subscribing to SAAB facts!

[–]Ollebro 1 point2 points ago

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[–]fyiiamaspy 2 points3 points ago

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What ever happened to that redditor that only posted pics of semis? I miss him. I think his name started with Metsrule or something.

[–]GoatSeas 2 points3 points ago

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Is that Snape's wife next to the cab? Death Eater of the Road!

[–]sandwichez 2 points3 points ago

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fucking mark.

[–]orezavi 2 points3 points ago

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Is it mean or does the OP want to hint towards the Stormtrooper, Darth Vader look alike trucks.

[–]BigT0406 2 points3 points ago

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And then there's Maude.... Oh wait, Mark...

[–]Bearmaster9013 1 point2 points ago

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He walks down the lonely road, a traveler of many deserts, the traverser of mountain tops, the conquerer of capes. He, is the chosen one to be given the epic name... of Mark. :l

[–]zeekar 2 points3 points ago

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Some call me . . . Tim.

[–]Philosophyforever 0 points1 point ago

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I believe that you are going into /r/nocontext

[–]Bearmaster9013 0 points1 point ago

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WOO!

[–]middledigitman 1 point2 points ago

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He'll never win truck of the year with that kind of attitude

[–]runs 1 point2 points ago

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Ah yes, the cabover... first one to the scene of the accident.

[–]wilkor 1 point2 points ago

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Did anyone else think it was luke skywalker in white robes behind darth vader?

But, like, trucks?

[–]helicalhell 1 point2 points ago

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And along came Mark..

[–]jeaguilar 1 point2 points ago

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Interesting names for Cylons.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Looks like a Darth Vader bus and a storm trooper bus.

[–]dcormier 1 point2 points ago

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I would've named it TK-421.

[–]MistarMark 1 point2 points ago

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This truck hath taken my name.

[–]josephanthony 1 point2 points ago

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MARK. King of the understated.

[–]CommandoTroll4 1 point2 points ago

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Still a better love story than twilight.

[–]limax 1 point2 points ago

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Trucks of the Year come and go. But there will always be Mark.

[–]aredditHER 1 point2 points ago

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Storm trooper vs vader pt 2

[–]thestranger44 1 point2 points ago

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mark...the truck that reminds me of a stormtrooper

[–]eire1228 1 point2 points ago

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Mark's door is always open. as is his fly....

[–]chefjpv 1 point2 points ago

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Front page? Top Post? Come on Reddit, Really?

[–]jonwalliser 1 point2 points ago

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Mark just gets the job done and takes none of the credit, im shocked he even shows up in the picture.

[–]kingmo590 1 point2 points ago

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they look like Storm Troopers!

[–]amplv14 4 points5 points ago

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does this remind anybody of darth vader and a stormtrooper?

[–]cookiemonstah87 1 point2 points ago

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Poor Mark. I think the truck of the year is trying to steal his soul.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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MARK.

That is all.

[–]SemFi 1 point2 points ago

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I'm sorry for my stupidity but could someone please explain to me why this is funny?

[–]FOcast 2 points3 points ago

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I love this comment thread, because my name is Mark.

[–]Namika 0 points1 point ago

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What a story Mark

[–]jerseydevil2oo3 0 points1 point ago

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Are you saying I fuck black chicks?

[–]Lower_Expectations 0 points1 point ago

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I heard he is Optimus Prime's cousin.

[–]Philoctitties 0 points1 point ago

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the dark queen and mark: eternal enemies locked in bitter conflict till the end of time

[–]Schwachsinn 0 points1 point ago

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[–]Vivancoser 0 points1 point ago

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Am I the only one one that sees a resemblance between "Mark" and a storm trooper?

[–]Rad2 0 points1 point ago

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Trick-ass Mark!

[–]ConorMaximus 0 points1 point ago

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Dark queen of the road sounds like a middle aged fat black women who absolutely dominates the truckers radio stations with her soulful singing and rants about her so called girlfriends.

[–]LeroyZanzibar 0 points1 point ago

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I was really hoping to find out that this was an episode of Top Gear that I didn't know about. I am disappoint.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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I had the worst feeling this was going to be a picture of me.

[–]ullrsdream 0 points1 point ago

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What's with the Saab griffen on the dark queen of the road?

[–]Bragzor 1 point2 points ago

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It's probably a Scania truck. I'm not expert though.

[–]Bobsyl 0 points1 point ago

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Nothing wrong with being Mark.

[–]TryingToSucceed 0 points1 point ago

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It's a great first name to say the least

[–]colusaboy 0 points1 point ago

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Roll on,Mark

love,

an old school long-haul trucker.

[–]Mark_Taiwan 0 points1 point ago

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It's weird, reading the comments.

[–]metallicana 0 points1 point ago

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...well, you will be spending a lot of time with the...

...ever popular Mark.

[–]cipher64 0 points1 point ago

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Dark Queen's the truck of the year, why is everyone raving about Mark.

[–]haiku_robot 1 point2 points ago

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Dark Queen's the truck of 
the year, why is everyone 
raving about Mark. 

[–]chelydrus 0 points1 point ago

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I was disappointed when op didn't name the thread "oh, hai mark!"

...then I read everyone's comments and was more than pleased.

[–]bakernt 0 points1 point ago

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So the stig's name is Mark.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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All I see is Darth Vader and a stormtrooper.

[–]redeyed9 0 points1 point ago

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His name was...........Tim?

[–]dghughes 0 points1 point ago

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I wonder if Dark Queen of the Night has a bejewelled gear shifter lever.

[–]ninjasaurxd 0 points1 point ago

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The Dark Queen of the road looks like Darth Vader, and Mark looks like a Stormtrooper.

[–]Miyashita 0 points1 point ago

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Looks shopped.

[–]Derpington_Fosworth 0 points1 point ago

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TIL The Stig's real name is mark.

[–]canpakesNOM 0 points1 point ago

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Did anyone else notice how it looks similar to Darth Vader and a stormtrooper next to each other?

[–]Dannmann93 0 points1 point ago

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Looks like a truck driving disney movie.

[–]VilliThor 0 points1 point ago

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Is that Snapes truck? Because I think Snape is about to enter it.

[–]AndrewCr8n 0 points1 point ago

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Darkness. Eternal.

[–]PictureofPoritrin 0 points1 point ago

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The nerd in me thinks Mark's bus looks a bit like a clonetrooper helmet. haters are welcome.

[–]Flanders2 0 points1 point ago

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They look like star wars helmets.

[–]wguid 0 points1 point ago

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Looks like Darth Vader's helmet .. And a stormtrooper's ..

[–]YesIdrivetheSaab 0 points1 point ago

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I see he drives the Saab as well.

[–]natholomew 0 points1 point ago

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engorged hubris, you either have it or you're a guy.

[–]lunixis 0 points1 point ago

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I just see Darth Vader and a Storm Trooper.

[–]dR05Emvp 0 points1 point ago

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Interracial couples are so cute

[–]MarkCE 0 points1 point ago

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This is relevant to me.