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WTF

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all 197 comments

[–]NickDouglas 204 points205 points ago

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Shh, don't tell him about the Ol' In-n-Out.

[–]confusionion[S] 108 points109 points ago

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Naughty, naughty, naughty! You finger lickin' old soomka!

[–]mr18inches 50 points51 points ago

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You can't get milk-plus at the soda fountain.

[–]macromolecule 27 points28 points ago

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Right right!

[–]Chinaroos 49 points50 points ago

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The Kentucky-Fried Chicken sold chicken legs, chicken breasts, chicken strips or popcorn chicken, which is what we were eating. This would sharpen you up and make you ready for a bit of the old.....

......Extra Crispy

[–]unsurebutwilling 50 points51 points ago

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......Ultra Crispy

FTFY

[–]s0n0fk0ng 5 points6 points ago

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The colenol had no license for selling soda, but there was no law yet against prodding some of the new veshches which they used to put into the old gravy, so you could peet it with vellocet or synthemesc or drencrom or one or two other veshches which would give you a nice quiet horrorshow fifteen minutes admiring Bog And All His Holy Herbs and Spices in your left shoe with lights bursting all over your mozg. Or you could peet gravy with knives in it, as we used to say, and this would sharpen you up and make you ready for a bit of greasy twenty-to-one, and that was what we were peeting this evening I'm starting off the story with.

[–]Gookslayer 7 points8 points ago

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I wish I could speak like this ;_;

[–]ohpollux 12 points13 points ago

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No sweat my little droogie, just learn Russian.

[–]Blue_Bi0hazard -2 points-1 points ago

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its actually polish

[–]ohpollux 7 points8 points ago

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Have you read the book? The book itself states that this slang is a mixture of Russian propaganda and stuff. Also I am Russian.

[–]Blue_Bi0hazard 8 points9 points ago

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well, I better shut the fuck up then.

all sources I read on the film (as I used to love it when I was younger) stated it was polish.

[–]ohpollux 4 points5 points ago

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Also, if you can I would really-really-really recommend reading that book. It's quite different from the film. Of course I'm not denying that the film itself is a masterpiece.

[–]free_range_veal 0 points1 point ago

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Just don't read the "controversial" last chapter. It kind of ruins the whole point (at least to me).

You're going to read the chapter now aren't you?

[–]ohpollux 0 points1 point ago

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I think it was good. It was a different ending, and it certainly made it more interesting for me as I was able to look at the story at a different perspective.

[–]Blue_Bi0hazard -1 points0 points ago

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If I recall there is a squeal to.

[–]ohpollux 1 point2 points ago

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Sadly I couldn't find the whole book online, to give you a direct quote. However if you're the kind of person who believes Wikipedia - here's a link. The first paragraph states that the argot is derived from Russian.

[–]ToastNazi 3 points4 points ago

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It's called Nadsat, and it's made-up of multiple different languages and slangs

[–]AKnightAlone 7 points8 points ago

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[–]Feelings_Are_Gay 3 points4 points ago

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You guys just seriously ruined the fucking book for me.

Fuck you.

[–]Infintinity 0 points1 point ago

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You mean the KFC drive through?

[–]dhamir 222 points223 points ago

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A Cluckwork Orange

[–]I_B_Trolling 66 points67 points ago

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[–]ky1t 9 points10 points ago

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If you want a two piece all white meat you take it, if you want a bucket of chicken you pluck it from the trees

[–]aengelpxl 16 points17 points ago

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A witty pun including my favorite movie and highly relevant to the post? Down here?

Up you go. Up and at them.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]drlemonberry 5 points6 points ago

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Up and Adam!

[–]riggsinator 5 points6 points ago

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Up-end Adam

[–]aengelpxl 3 points4 points ago

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"Up. And. At. Them. "

[–]fastredb 29 points30 points ago

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It's yarble kickin' good!

[–]SaladFengasPapit 105 points106 points ago

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Colonel Sanders and his droogs out for a bit of the ultra-violence.

[–]neverinvalid 24 points25 points ago

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We were all feeling a bit shagged and fagged and fashed, it being a night of no small expenditure.

[–]found314 4 points5 points ago

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I just instinctively checked to make sure my wallet was still where it should be ...

[–]ihahp 29 points30 points ago

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[–]somuchbacon 15 points16 points ago*

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Also relevant.

Edit: NSFW, hookers and blow, bro.

[–]JPark19 10 points11 points ago

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Had a good laugh when I got to the Subway Boys.

[–]8_Guys_Frm_Baltimore 2 points3 points ago

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Don't fuck with the Subway Boys

[–][deleted] 47 points48 points ago

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Viddy well, little brother. Viddy well.

[–]Eddie_The_Brewer 3 points4 points ago

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The three droogs are presumably the Colonel's malchikins?

[–]Thousands_may_Attack 10 points11 points ago

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A malenky bit before the colonel drew his britva.

[–]Mange-Tout 3 points4 points ago

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I remember this scene. The colonel is just about to kick the shit out of the other three for challenging his authority.

[–]Cosmic_Charlie 10 points11 points ago

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Out for a little of the ol' ultra crispy.

[–]Fat_Alberta 7 points8 points ago

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[–]stinkymonkeh 19 points20 points ago

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Love this movie but ever since I saw it Singing in the Rain has never quite been the same for me.

[–]greiger 31 points32 points ago

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[–]distortednet 8 points9 points ago

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ok, that's fucking awesome

[–]pretty_annoying_tbh 2 points3 points ago

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[–]jnjs 2 points3 points ago

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Not sure if you knew this or not, but Malcolm McDowell improvised that scene and added the character singing that song all on his own.

[–]stinkymonkeh 1 point2 points ago

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I didn't know that! Made an already disturbing scene even more so. I'm actually surprised Kubrick let him do that and put it in the final cut of the movie. From what I've heard about him he was supposed to be super controlling.

[–]78up 6 points7 points ago

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This made my day

[–]lukneuns 0 points1 point ago

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I read it in his voice and could not stop laughing. Gold.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]pigeonpanic 20 points21 points ago

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They're wearing codpieces. I think it's explained a bit more in the book as being in fashion at the time.

[–]butterbeerben 17 points18 points ago

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I always assumed they were just cups to protect against low blows.

[–]the_opinion 16 points17 points ago

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They are dressed in the height of fashion, brother

[–]sciolism 1 point2 points ago

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heighth of fashion

FTFY

[–]TheLordB 8 points9 points ago

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As someone else said they are cod pieces. It was also explained in the book that the cod pieces had actual shapes and each of them was wearing a different one... I think one was shaped as a dog and so on.

Though given another part of what they did was engage in vicious fights with other gangs I would imagine this particular fashion habit came about as an advantage in a fight.

Also the author seems to have somewhat of a fascination of people getting hit in the balls given the main character has the truant officer punch him in the balls at one point.

[–]distortednet 2 points3 points ago

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its supposed to be (i think) set in a future where the government is a bit over-controlling. my best guess is our idea of what an over controlling government ran future back then was a bit strange.

besides, i would be scared to fuck with anyone wearing a diaper.

[–]redditwithafork 3 points4 points ago

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Diaper wearer here! Upvote for you, because I also conceal carry a loaded 45 one chambered up. Safety on of course.. but I also practice holster draw from a concealed position, and can have the safety off and the hammer cocked before I'm even at a "high ready" and I've already yelled, "stop, don't hurt me, stop, don't hurt me! And I'm ready to shoot you in the kill zone, with all 9 rounds. And a second magazine loaded. Before the smoke clears! Don't be fooled by the diaper.

[–]dodus 0 points1 point ago

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Glorious.

[–]LWRellim 0 points1 point ago

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its supposed to be (i think) set in a future where the government is a bit over-controlling

Apparently you are unfamiliar with Rick Santorum's proposed "platform".

[–]pagodapagoda 2 points3 points ago

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This is the perfect mix of nodding to old favorites and WTF. Brilliantly executed man.

[–]dienaked 3 points4 points ago

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This nochy? A bucket of original recipe and a glass of ol' moloko, veck!

[–]ape655321 2 points3 points ago

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Horrorshow! Real horrorshow!

[–]Spazum 3 points4 points ago

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Clockwork Orange Sesame Chicken.

[–]KazamaSmokers 4 points5 points ago

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Georgie, Pete, Harlan and Dim.

[–]jimforever27 8 points9 points ago

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I hope there is a day when everyone can viddy this beautiful film :) Also read the book!! It's much better!!

[–]SDLearmonth -5 points-4 points ago

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better that Kubrick? nah.

[–]klapaucius 13 points14 points ago

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It's a law of cinema adaptation: the book is always better.

[–]PlusFiveStrength 4 points5 points ago

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Forrest Gump?

[–]hreigle 1 point2 points ago

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The movie was definitely much better than the novel.

[–]its-the-new-style 0 points1 point ago

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Sex in The City 2 ?

[–]Kerguidou 4 points5 points ago

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It often is the case, but I wouldn't call it a law. Great movies based on books take the original material and make a great movie out of it rather than just make an adaptation. Just look at Kubrick's filmography: Dr Strangelove, the shining, full metal jacket, 2001 space odyssey, eyes wide shut and clockwork orange are all arguably as good or better than the original material.

Other movies, such as the Godfather and Blade runner are also great because they decided to make a movie rather than simply adapt a book.

[–]mattc286 1 point2 points ago

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Fun fact: The 2001 novel was written concurrently with the film and was published after the release of the film, so it's not really the "original material" the way other adaptations are. It was based on some earlier short stories of Clarke's, though.

[–]the_opinion 7 points8 points ago

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The defence presents: The Prestige. Fight Club.

[–]GenuinelyCrooked 1 point2 points ago

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Also, The Princess Bride.

[–]capnza 0 points1 point ago

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Have you read the Prestige? I thought it was much better as a book.

[–]the_opinion 1 point2 points ago

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Of course I've read it. I wouldn't be able to make the claim above otherwise! I prefer the story as told through the film

[–]capnza 2 points3 points ago

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Your nickname is too good for this discussion :P

[–]the_opinion 0 points1 point ago

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So it has come to this.

[–]MethLab -1 points0 points ago

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Palahniuk's novel, Fight Club, is much better than the movie. Especially Fincher's fucking Hollywood happy ending bullshit.

[–]the_opinion 7 points8 points ago

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Palahniuk doesn't agree. I don't agree. It's all subjective.

[–]DiceboyT 0 points1 point ago

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Nothing says happy ending like a man who just tried to kill himself watching skyscrapers fall down.

[–]Davezter 1 point2 points ago

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Stand by me

[–]conshinz 0 points1 point ago

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What about Shawshank Redemption?

[–]plasticmouse 0 points1 point ago

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A little different. The story from the film doesn't even exist in book form after all. Well, not as fleshed out anyways. I love that film.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]plasticmouse 0 points1 point ago*

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IKEA. Whhhhyyyy.

[–]plasticmouse 0 points1 point ago

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Yes I know. But it was a short story. I meant the film was more fleshed out. Bad wording. I'm stuck in Ikea right now and losing the will to live.

[–]scrambled_legs 0 points1 point ago

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And Misery.

[–]opex14 0 points1 point ago

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Mostly true, though The Godfather and Mystic River are two that I feel as though are the exception

[–]SDLearmonth -1 points0 points ago

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Sometimes the films are better. Of course everything we're talking about is subjective. Although the way I see it they are obviously two different things, a film tells the story mainly through visuals and a book through words. So I think Kubrick wins it in my opinion because he is a master at cinematography.

[–]klapaucius 1 point2 points ago

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I'll admit, it's more of a shallow generalization than anything. The translation is risky, but can pay off from time to time.

This is only semi-related, but I wish that comic books would gain more acceptance as a medium. It combines visual and verbal storytelling in a way that allows and requires the effective use of both.

[–]DrSmoke 0 points1 point ago

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99% of the time, the book was better. Sometimes, doesn't even matter at that point.

[–]NixonInhell 1 point2 points ago

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Clockwork Orange was my favorite movie for many a year. Yes, the book is better than the movie and that's saying a lot.

[–]DrSmoke -1 points0 points ago

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The movie is actually a travesty, it misses the entire point of the book.

The movie "A clockwork orange" is about as bad of an adaptation as IRobot was.

[–]ReaganYouth 0 points1 point ago

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You're entitled to your own opinion, but fuck you.

[–]pigeonpanic 2 points3 points ago

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Chicken plus?

[–]Good_Guy_Graig 10 points11 points ago

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What is this from?

[–]confusionion[S] 101 points102 points ago

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75% Clockwork Orange, 25% KFC.

[–]rikker_ 31 points32 points ago

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100% WTF

[–]Kurskovich 9 points10 points ago

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KFC isn't really that WTF but A Clockwork Orange adds the extra zazz.

[–]pigeonpanic 9 points10 points ago

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It's the secret ingredient.

[–]archlich 2 points3 points ago

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I can't help but read this comment in murderface's voice.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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And both have secret ingredients.

[–]Good_Guy_Graig 2 points3 points ago

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Regardless I really want chicken.

[–]Dagur 4 points5 points ago

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A little KFC L'Orange would hit the spot

[–]Gramma42ton 2 points3 points ago

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What we need now to make it a perfect night is some of the Ludwig Van

[–]RoyallyTenenbaumed 13 points14 points ago

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Someone needs to be a Good Guy Greg to you and make you watch A Clockwork Orange

[–]3D_Dot_Soul 21 points22 points ago

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With or without eye clamps?

[–]jimforever27 12 points13 points ago

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with of course!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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Can we get some eye drops then?

[–]jimforever27 1 point2 points ago

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I suppose so… can't let you miss any of the action due to dry eyes.

[–]Heavy_Rain 12 points13 points ago

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Someone needs to be a Good Guy Greg to you and make you read A Clockwork Orange

FTFY

[–]squigs 3 points4 points ago

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Well, it's well worth reading, but the pic really suggests the film.

[–]Virtureally 1 point2 points ago

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Read it first, watch it after. Both versions are great!

[–]RoyallyTenenbaumed 1 point2 points ago

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True. The book is great as well. But I actually liked the film more. Kubrick is genius. The music and images make it so much more real than my imagination ever could.

[–]node_wrapper 3 points4 points ago

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It's actually one of those very rare cases where the film is better than the book.

[–]rollerboogie 3 points4 points ago

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This is a really really good picture.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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It is except that the Colonel is a bit tan especially to be in England.

[–]H-Resin 1 point2 points ago

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hah, I just watched this yesterday! WTF sanders, stop burping, it's gross.

[–]KazamaSmokers 1 point2 points ago

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The Millicents have nothing on me, sir. Colonel, I mean.

[–]daveofstrength 1 point2 points ago

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I was cured alright

[–]ChemicallyBlind 1 point2 points ago

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the colonel is the most humble of all narators

[–]helicalhell 1 point2 points ago

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What a movie that was..

[–]Mange-Tout 1 point2 points ago

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I showed it to my wife and she said, "It was soooooo slow and boring!"

-Facepalm-

[–]elconquistador1985 0 points1 point ago

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When my wife and I watched it, we spent the whole movie saying "What the actual fuck just happened?"

[–]pyronics 1 point2 points ago

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I showed this to my girlfriend, she said "Oh look, it's uncle ben" facepalm

[–]pomo 1 point2 points ago

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What's this I viddy with my own glazzies? Pixels!

[–]knowses 1 point2 points ago

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Come'in get one in the biscuits, if you've got any biscuits!

[–]A_Tree 1 point2 points ago

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KFC have started making eggiweggs?

[–]Eddie_The_Brewer 0 points1 point ago

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Only for Brekkywek

[–]thats_not_wtf 1 point2 points ago

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Nothing wtf about photoshopping a character into a scene.

[–]shiznitfool 1 point2 points ago

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why is this in WTF?

[–]FabesE 1 point2 points ago

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[–]ol_dirt_mcgurk 0 points1 point ago

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Hah. Quite nice.

[–]stack_trace 1 point2 points ago

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I had read this in Alex's voice before I even saw the picture. I was pleasantly surprised when I actually opened it.

[–]ratterbatter 1 point2 points ago

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eggiweggs!!!

[–]DongleNocker 1 point2 points ago

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Wait for the scenes later when they condition him to become violently ill upon hearing the song "Dixieland"

[–]hotasmonkeys 3 points4 points ago

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Wrong subreddit.

[–]babyeagleWMD 1 point2 points ago

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Colonel Sanders and his droogs.

[–]RoyallyTenenbaumed 1 point2 points ago

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This is so full of Win, I can't even explain it.

[–]georgeftw -1 points0 points ago

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not wtf

[–]GinRoxMySox 0 points1 point ago

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Turned on?

[–]Youko1776 0 points1 point ago

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I love this book and movie for some reason...O.o

[–]Doofangoodle 13 points14 points ago

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The reason is its an excellently written book and brilliantly produced movie.

[–]Mange-Tout 0 points1 point ago

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The funny thing is that Anthony Burgess hated that book and the fact that he became identified with it. He thought it was just a bit of trash that he tossed off to make a quick buck.

[–]PastyNoob 0 points1 point ago

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Righty right right.

[–]losttheory 0 points1 point ago

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Right horrorshow.

[–]KuchDaddy 0 points1 point ago

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Holy shit, what a coincidence. I just watched that movie for the first time last night.

[–]thrilloilogy 0 points1 point ago

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More like willy willy willy willy willy...

[–]Kingroudy 0 points1 point ago

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One of the weirdest yet most interesting movies of all time.

[–]InsertOneLiner 0 points1 point ago

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All this, and not a single reference to Kafka on the Shore.

[–]Fly_Squatter 0 points1 point ago

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Moments after slaughtering dozens of chickens, the gang starts to wonder if inviting the bearded man along was a good idea.

[–]Hammerhead3229 0 points1 point ago

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hands down the best thing I've seen on reddit

[–]ceawake 0 points1 point ago

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Someone said that the 11 herbs and spices were rubbish. Call for Colonel Slanders!

[–]peepholecircus 0 points1 point ago

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You know what you can do with that watch? stick it up your arse!

[–]stagnet 0 points1 point ago

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Ultraviolence

[–]kellydean1 0 points1 point ago

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Nice job.

[–]Yggdrazzil 0 points1 point ago

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I don't understand any of this, nor the comments.

[–]Mange-Tout 2 points3 points ago

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You're culturally deprived.

[–]Yggdrazzil 3 points4 points ago

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I humbly apologise for being so, and earnestly criticize you for not improving me at all.

[–]MC-Master-Bedroom 2 points3 points ago

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It's a photoshop of a famous scene from the movie A Clockwork Orange, considered one of the best movies of the 1970's. The film is a disturbing and scathing social commentary, based on the Anthony Burgess novel of the same name.

Contains some of the creepiest scenes in the history of film, including the forced 'therapy' sessions with eyes pinned open, and several beatings/murders/rapes, including a combo beating and rape to the tune of Singin' In The Rain.

[–]Yggdrazzil 0 points1 point ago

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O-kay. Sounds like a movie I'm glad I skipped. Thanks for bringing my lazy ass up to speed!

[–]ctesibius 0 points1 point ago

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And a tramp being burned alive, although I've never seen a copy with that scene included.

[–]Rohri_Calhoun 0 points1 point ago

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I've got to stop skimming these headlines. I totally read that as "Elven herbs ans spices". Then I was disappointed when I saw the pic

[–]MrMojoRisinGuy 0 points1 point ago

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Time for some clockwork orange

[–]too_many_vices 0 points1 point ago

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ok so about 5 days ago there was a link posted about some clockwork orange being the best movie from the 70s and i instatnly watched it again for the first time in prob 5 years without even upvoting that dude. i dunno why im typing this right now guess im just curious if you saw that watched it and posted here again with ur funny ass shit i need sleep ive forgotten punctuation for like all of these sentences goodnight

[–]FindingIt 0 points1 point ago

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Brilliant!

[–]MC-Master-Bedroom 0 points1 point ago

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This is better than a tolchok in the yarbles with a frozen mukluk!

[–]reagan2016 0 points1 point ago

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Ultra-Spices!

[–]kingnutter 0 points1 point ago

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He gets rumbled in the end by eating a Zinger in the Rain.

[–]ol_dirt_mcgurk 0 points1 point ago

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Absolute brilliance. You've pulled a deep, resounding laugh from me. Cheers.

[–]stelliokantos 0 points1 point ago

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that looks like university of richmond

[–]bassbreakr 0 points1 point ago

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Why does this feel like its a setup for the Anchorman brawl of fast food?

[–]Kotev 0 points1 point ago

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A Clockwork Fried Chicken.

[–]shroomdizzle 0 points1 point ago

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i tried to show my friends this movie and they said it sucked...

[–]confusionion[S] 0 points1 point ago

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Roger Ebert doesn't like it either.

[–]forevercreeping 0 points1 point ago

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Captain Underpants?

[–]Eddie_The_Brewer 0 points1 point ago

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I take a Dim view on such shenanigans, Droogy.

[–]jezmund 0 points1 point ago

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Am I the only one here that has read the book several times but never seen the movie?

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

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I don't even OWN a television!

[–]spagnitz 0 points1 point ago

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kfc is great for a bit of the ol' ultraviolence

[–]AJM77 0 points1 point ago

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And on the right, Phil Hoffman's character from Boogie Nights.

[–]JTKHammer 0 points1 point ago

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Oh!?, and wot's so tasty about it? Ya flaming bag of chick oil!

[–]All_the_other_kids 0 points1 point ago

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Thats a badass picture

[–]FirionII 0 points1 point ago

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Wait, I don't get it. I've only read the book.

[–]clayides 0 points1 point ago

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Poor dim...

[–]bertstare 0 points1 point ago

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[–]hreigle -2 points-1 points ago

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I suddenly want to watch The Warriors again.

[–]oxbeansxo 0 points1 point ago

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rofl

[–]jamie1051 -1 points0 points ago

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