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top 200 commentsshow all 318

[–]frozen_beer 124 points125 points ago

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[–]holger-danske 145 points146 points ago

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TORTUGA!

[–]NullCharacter 75 points76 points ago

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Hola DEA

[–]Intr0vert 37 points38 points ago

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BOOM

[–]Aitioma 16 points17 points ago

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What's the matter? You act like you never saw a severed human head on a tortoise before.

[–]brianb47 1 point2 points ago

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http://www.imgur.com/5uAw9.jpg

Posted this to pics a couple days ago. Didn't get any love. I bartend, and a girl left this as a tip after finding out I like Breaking Bad.

[–]coffeefuckyeah 20 points21 points ago

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and he is responsible.

[–]LaughingCrow 1 point2 points ago

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"You'd better cut your dog's balls off... or I'll cut off yours."

[–]Haha_MadeYouLook 17 points18 points ago

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I was expecting a picture of him and a turtle.

[–]rocco888 16 points17 points ago

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[–]StickyCthulhu 58 points59 points ago

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[–]kyal 17 points18 points ago

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I never noticed it said "Hola DEA."

[–]plaird 8 points9 points ago

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Have you not finished season 3?

[–]kyal 8 points9 points ago

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I have. I just always assumed he was writing "big talker" in Spanish.

[–]Lilday 5 points6 points ago

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I also made this mistake.

[–]thedddronald 2 points3 points ago

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SPOILERS

[–]StickyCthulhu 1 point2 points ago

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He's not that important of a character, but I suppose.

[–]thedddronald 3 points4 points ago

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This has nothing to do with the importance of the character. You can't pretend you saw what happened there coming, maybe the big picture, but not the gruesome details. People who view this image before they see the episode will have the surprise spoiled for them, that's why this is a spoiler.

[–]StickyCthulhu 1 point2 points ago

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I understand what spoilers are ಠ_ಠ

[–]lud1120 1 point2 points ago

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Fifthworldpic? Wtf.

[–]cant_be_pun_seen 4 points5 points ago

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Ive always pictured him more as a turtle man, myself...

[–]JoshSN 1 point2 points ago

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But, apparently, plants can BURN!

[–]swartz77 2 points3 points ago

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So much so that he's masturbating to the damn thing

[–]My_Boston_Terrier 2 points3 points ago

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He's probably just cupping his magnificent balls.

[–]svejkist 1 point2 points ago

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And Plastilina wrote a song about him.

[–]ilintner003 185 points186 points ago

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I've always imagined that in spite of his often " hard assed " roles, that he is a super nice guy.

[–]Johannasburg 222 points223 points ago

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I've worked with him on set and he is by far the nicest guy I've ever met. We were shooting a feature in East LA and locals would come by and watch us film. Between takes he was always busy taking pictures with whoever asked for one. He actually told the producers that he needs extra time to interact with his fans.

He also joked with me between takes of the bank robbery scene we were shooting, that it was like he was having de ja vu. Then he also mentioned that the best way to rob a bank was with a grenade.

[–]tekkentool 71 points72 points ago

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A grenade....Of course.

[–]snailboy 113 points114 points ago

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[–]Caturday_Yet 1 point2 points ago

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I've actually never seen that movie, although I should make time. What's the backstory behind that one photo, if it doesn't give away spoilers?

[–]V33G33 8 points9 points ago

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I couldn't do it justice, you're much better off watching the movie.

[–]Caturday_Yet 5 points6 points ago

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Fair enough!

[–]The_Dane 2 points3 points ago

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News teams face off in a Gangs of New York style alley melee.

[–]xkontemplatex 1 point2 points ago

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I never noticed that his tie is smiley faces. Awesome.

[–]Zeppelanoid 1 point2 points ago

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This gets thrown out there too much, but I literally snorted when I saw that picture.

Also, Brick, where did you get a hand grenade?

[–]crustation 1 point2 points ago

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.. and a trident..

[–][deleted] 27 points28 points ago

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This is genuinely a cool story, bro. I felt the same way as ilintner003, so it's awesome to hear confirmation of it.

[–]Kelvin_Inman 11 points12 points ago

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The best way to do anything is with a grenade.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]cfuse 15 points16 points ago

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At least she went out with a bang.

[–]HEADSHOTHUNTA 1 point2 points ago

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HA

[–]Mr_Ibericus 12 points13 points ago

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My dad told me Danny Trejo went to jail because he robbed a bank using a grenade. Now I know it's true

[–]noremaxc 10 points11 points ago

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I too worked on that set. If I wasn't on Reddit or playing Angry Birds, I was babysitting bystanders. I got to talk to some of the local kids who only know him as "Machete". Nothing like working from 9 am to 3am in a super ghetto east LA park. Gang members + a shooting one street over + police helicopters = Production Value!!

[–]Johannasburg 11 points12 points ago

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yep... a shooting around 2am in the house next to our set, bringing in about 20 cops and helicopters circling us over head... I've seen the trailer and the b-roll footage they took of the helicopters made it in.

[–]BnGamesReviews 18 points19 points ago

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I live here (East LA), its not all that bad.

[–]damnshoes 1 point2 points ago

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With a grenade? Now I wonder.

[–]welltheresAbacon 1 point2 points ago

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What were you doing on set?

[–]Johannasburg 1 point2 points ago

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Production designer. The film's called Strike One - it's in post production now.

[–]welltheresAbacon 1 point2 points ago

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What exactly does a production designer do and how did you get into it? My dream is to work with films in any way I can for a living so I'm very curious

[–]Johannasburg 1 point2 points ago

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Everything you see on screen is put there by the production designer... they deal with designing and building the sets, set decoration, props, picture cars, graphics, logos etc. Lots of insanely long hours making things, basically. You can get into it by looking for art department jobs on craigslist or Mandy. I'd have to say it's one of the hardest but most fun departments to work in in the film industry.

[–]mocotazo 56 points57 points ago

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Danny Trejo had been in every prison in California. Today he does a great deal of volunteer work to help people.

Check out the documentary "Champion" that was made about him, great stuff. Watch the trailer on Youtube

[–]eroding 1 point2 points ago

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Very interesting doco that one. Well worth the watch.

[–]cyberslick188 4 points5 points ago

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Or you know, just one prison.

In Pennsylvania.

Almost the same thing as every prison in Cali.

[–]Smegma_Torpedo 44 points45 points ago

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The comment you were replying to is not entirely false, as Trejo says:

I was in San Quentin, Folsom, Soledad, Vacaville, Susanville, Sierra

source

The wikipedia claim that he spent time in Holmesburg Prison in Pennsylvania is not sourced, and a google search will find many instances of the wikipedia article cut and pasted into various contexts, but yields no factual proof.

I can't say for certain that the claim is entirely false, nor do I care to devote the time to falsifying it, but it would appear that this is misinformation.

tl;dr cite and be critical of your information

[–]gryphian 16 points17 points ago

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Tell Octavio the deal is off.

[–]dragon512 1 point2 points ago

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Even though didnt voice him He will always be Octavio to me. He did voice enrique though.

[–]IndianaJwns 37 points38 points ago

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His Wikipedia article is a great read. He really does seem like an awesome guy.

[–]Big_Baby_Jesus 57 points58 points ago*

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I know how lazy you are, reddit.

Link

He's in better shape than most 67 year olds.

[–]MrUmibozu 22 points23 points ago

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Holy shit, he's 67?

[–]Big_Baby_Jesus 13 points14 points ago

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He was 51 in Desperado, which was his first big role.

[–]illest808 6 points7 points ago

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...what the fuck really? damn guy looks good as hell for that age.

[–]Sucks_At_Insulting 93 points94 points ago

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You're a 67 year old

[–]kyal 22 points23 points ago

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You suck at insulting people.

[–]CraigChrist 22 points23 points ago

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Yeah well the insulting store called, and they're all out of you!

[–]ELBdelorean 8 points9 points ago

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What's the difference? You're their all-time bestseller!

[–]triple_OG 11 points12 points ago

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YEAH.....WELL.....I SLEPT WITH YOUR WIFE!

[–]ELBdelorean 7 points8 points ago

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My wife's in a coma.

[–]Ebombz 17 points18 points ago

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Doesn't matter had sex.

[–]Sucks_At_Insulting 14 points15 points ago

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Oh yeah? Well news flash.

[–]kyal 6 points7 points ago

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Have you tried complimenting people? Maybe you'd be good at it.

[–]teh__sukc 2 points3 points ago

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*your

[–]btguinn 1 point2 points ago

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I'm sad that your joke went unappreciated.

[–]Powermoveski 11 points12 points ago

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I actually grew up and played hockey with his son who is also named Danny (who happens to be a badass goalie!) and he would come to his sons games all the time, and seriosuly one of the coolest dudes you would ever come across. I remember many many occasions where he would show up with 2 cases of gatorades(always lemon lime and orange, gross) for us, pretty fkn awesome, seriously one of the coolest and most humble people ever.

[–]sick_transit 8 points9 points ago

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He visited my old high-school in Whitter, CA last year to talk to the kids about his decisions he made and how to better themselves. My little brother was there and said that it was really effective. Most kids expect to hear some "dork" lecture to them about life, not a bad-ass like Danny.

[–]Last_Years_Villain 21 points22 points ago

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He is both a hardass and a nice guy. He saved me from a fight once.

[–]GODFATHER_OF_REDDIT 19 points20 points ago

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Can't just leave us hanging like that. Go on...

[–]Last_Years_Villain 67 points68 points ago*

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It wasn't a big deal. My roommate got into a shoving match outside of the key club over us buying the last hotdog from a street vendor. We pulled him away, then crossed the street. The other group crossed the street and parked themselves between us and the way to our car. I kept holding my people back while both groups were yelling. Him and his entourage came out of a closed tatoo shop there to see wtf was going on. He told us to stfu and get inside. We hung out and chatted for a bit; he showed us some of his tats and told us the stories behind them. None of my friends recognized who he was, so it was pretty awesome for me. We hung out there for a while and eventually he offered to walk us to our car if we still scared. Made all the men in our group seem like pussies without even trying; nearly stole our womens too!

[–]GODFATHER_OF_REDDIT 34 points35 points ago

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It wasn't a big deal.

No, sir. That's a good story.

[–]shake-zula 23 points24 points ago

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While he was doing time in San Quentin, he held two boxing titles. Do you know how much of a badass you have to be, to be the toughest guy in San Quentin? So yeah, he makes everyone look like a pussy.

[–]Captain_Generous 6 points7 points ago*

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This. He's so fucking badass.

SPOILERS FOR THOSE WHO LIKE SONS OF ANARCHY BELOW **

**

**

**

During filming of Sons Of Anarchy, his character ends up working for the CIA, and he said he hated that, and hated playing a 'good guy', because he's always bad guys

EDIT: SPOILERZ

[–]Wakka37 2 points3 points ago

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Spoiler tag that. Just a heads up

[–]hippythekid 1 point2 points ago

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He's...Mah-che-tay!

[–]dochoff 7 points8 points ago

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I require a story!

[–]Wordwang_Host 1 point2 points ago

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hardass

That's Wordwang!

[–]atomichugbot 5 points6 points ago

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Met the guy on one of my flights. Super nice and chill guy. A couple asked him if he would switch seats so they could sit together and he didn't even hesitate. Got to talk to him for a bit and I told him he sold out Di Nero in Heat, he just laughed. Awesome guy.

[–]Notosk 29 points30 points ago

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A friend of mine met him during Comicon he was giving away "Tacos al pastor"
he was super nice

[–]Boxcore 18 points19 points ago

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Tacos al pastor are the best tacos ever!

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]lazyboy982 8 points9 points ago

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On the west coast they are all pork and marinated in pineapple and chilies. I have never heard of any beef pastor, where are you located that you get them served that way?

[–]TBatWork 3 points4 points ago

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Mmm, steak baby and pork baby.

[–]GernBlanstonInLove 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Cozmo23 18 points19 points ago

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They'd call him Johnny 600 if they knew the truth.

[–]wafflecopters 2 points3 points ago

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That just doesn't have the same ring to it...

[–]raybrignsx 3 points4 points ago

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That's all I think of when I see him in other movies.

[–]Z3F 19 points20 points ago

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He harnesses the power of the moustache.

[–]cat55 14 points15 points ago

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what is he doing with his right hand?!

[–]My_Boston_Terrier 22 points23 points ago

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Killing the other bird.

[–]redandjonny[S] 45 points46 points ago

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That bird just fucked with the wrong Mexican.

[–]ChildOfYost 7 points8 points ago

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Who would have thought a Mexican day laborer would be a GOD DAMN FEDERALE!!

[–]mrdm242 1 point2 points ago

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That bird just flocked with the wrong Mexican.

Ugh...so sorry.

[–]RonWisely 5 points6 points ago

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Masturbating, of course. What are you currently doing with your right hand?

[–]xorvious 17 points18 points ago

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Machete doan text.

[–]jglee1236 29 points30 points ago

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Danny Trejo's the fuckin man.

[–]achenbaum 23 points24 points ago

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[–]Gorignak 14 points15 points ago

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What happened to his face? Honest question...

[–]knifegash 15 points16 points ago

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Drug abuse. The hard stuff.

[–]ProfessorSuccessor 3 points4 points ago

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In addition to drug addiction and a hard life, he was a state prison boxing champ (light and welterweight) during a long stretch for drugs and robbery. Think about that: prison boxing champion ...for two weight classes. That kind of life will leave a story on your body.

[–]stop_being-a-dick 1 point2 points ago

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Him and Edward James Olmos are having a contest to see who can look more like an orange rind. Danny is currently in the lead.

[–]eduardj 45 points46 points ago

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tortuga

[–]xanthine_junkie 8 points9 points ago

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i love him but he scares me

[–]Robstaley 9 points10 points ago

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[–]luckybms 16 points17 points ago

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“There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die.”

[–]basec0m 8 points9 points ago

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If they ever re-make the Princess Bride, I want Danny to play the Grandpa role.

[–]miksedene 8 points9 points ago

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Really? Not Inigo Montoya with a machete?

[–]TheBlindCat 8 points9 points ago

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You killed my father... now I'm going to kill everything you ever loved!

[–]californicarepublic 19 points20 points ago*

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That may be one of the odder best photos I've seen of him.

Edit: to fix typo (thanks ElBiscuit)

[–]ElBiscuit 10 points11 points ago

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You spelled "best" wrong.

[–]californicarepublic 6 points7 points ago

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Es la verdad. I need to show this pic to a mutual friend I have with Danny and see what he has to say.

[–]TumorPizza 27 points28 points ago

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Definitely not a Mexican't.

[–]azsincitymagic 5 points6 points ago

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so what's with the dove? is he gonna do a john woo film or something?

[–]viennasausages 4 points5 points ago

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I would pay so much money to see that.

[–]SunblockDrink 5 points6 points ago

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Hard.As.Fuck.

[–]legsandlungs 3 points4 points ago

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He dated my cousin for years. At first I wasn't sure I believed her because she's a bit of a free spirit, but she kept on talking and talking about their relationship. A few months later I was at South by Southwest walking around the convention center. I spotted Danny Trejo across the room and knew this was my chance to set the record straight. I introduced myself and asked him if he knew my cousin. He said she was his girl and that he was so happy to be meeting more of her family. He honestly couldn't have been sweeter, he was a very warm and kind guy.

[–]grumblert 6 points7 points ago

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Such a gentle soul.

[–]My_Boston_Terrier 3 points4 points ago

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Oh that Trejo !

[–]luzfero 4 points5 points ago

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Still a bad-ass.

[–]Compumerk 2 points3 points ago

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He stands for peace.

[–]risumon 4 points5 points ago

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Saving this for co-worker's desktop background the next time he leaves his station unattended.

[–]kinghfb 4 points5 points ago

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I got super excited when I discovered that he did the voice acting for Raul the Ghoul in Fallout: New Vegas. It's like having Danny Trejo follow you around being a smartass.

[–]Yadizinha 9 points10 points ago

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I'd like to share this horrible mental image with you: I once watched a shitty movie on SyFy where Danny Trejo played a 150+ year old zombie. And in one scene in particular, he was fapping. For like 15 minutes, I watched Zombie Danny Trejo fap.

You're welcome.

[–]skrilled 3 points4 points ago

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saw him at a habit burger grill in the valley a week ago eating with his family. he is a lot shorter than i assumed.

[–]SmellyJoey 3 points4 points ago

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I was going to say that's because he is the Mexican Wolverine but the truth is Wolverine is the Canadian Danny Trejo.

[–]DocFreudstein 4 points5 points ago

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He is one of the top 5 celebrities that I would like to get drunk with.

[–]opex14 4 points5 points ago

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The man knows how to practice good oral hygeine it seems. That's always the first thing that I notice in pictures so sorry if that comment is a bit...different.

[–]symbiotics 2 points3 points ago

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you can't tell by the expression, but that pigeon is terrified and flying away for its life

[–]fishtacos4evry1 6 points7 points ago

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You just fucked with the wrong Mexican.

[–]Leejin 2 points3 points ago

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I just watched heat last night... Such a badass movie!!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Anybody who's been on King of the Hill is alright in my book.

[–]Giant_Enemy_Cliche 2 points3 points ago

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Shame about the turtle head explosion.

Who am I kidding, that was awesome.

[–]tyceratops 2 points3 points ago

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He is so bad ass his face is made of pumice

[–]YakiVegas 2 points3 points ago

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That reminds me, I still need to see Machete.

[–]syam3000 2 points3 points ago

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He has some nice teeth for a 67 yr old!

[–]Billagio 2 points3 points ago

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The Tortise

[–]ravencoal 2 points3 points ago

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I don't know what's going on in this picture, but I approve.

[–]sgtpppr 2 points3 points ago

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This is what happens when you have John Woo take your picture.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Hola DEA

[–]deickh 2 points3 points ago

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Who else thought this was Octavio?

[–]Archaia 2 points3 points ago

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All those memories will be lost in time like tears in rain.

[–]blueberrydanish 1 point2 points ago

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ctrl-f "tears in rain"

reddit does not dissapoint. this should be higher up though.

[–]He11razor 2 points3 points ago

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I declare this picture fucking awesome.

[–]Phoequinox 2 points3 points ago

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Danny Trejo is the prime example of someone who wasn't bad, just desperate. The difference is remarkable, and he is genuinely an awesome guy. I'm glad he's finally being noticed as more than just "that scary, angry guy".

[–]Azn4sho 2 points3 points ago

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[–]Dannmann93 2 points3 points ago

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Majestic!

[–]robcrusoe 1 point2 points ago

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quick, somebody make gif!!

[–]DaanFag 1 point2 points ago

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Just an all around great guy.

[–]LaraInWonderland 1 point2 points ago

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What is his other hand doing?

[–]FAPDegren 1 point2 points ago

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Is there a story to this? Besides Danny Trejo being a boss, that is.

[–]hungry138imp 1 point2 points ago

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If I could upvote this any more my dick would explode. In a shower of blood. Because I'd have achieved a super boner. I'm going to stop now. But you still have that image in your head. So HA

[–]kenvsryu 1 point2 points ago

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I'm about to release your soul.

[–]apert 1 point2 points ago

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sweet prince...

[–]AnUndEadMonk3y 1 point2 points ago

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NO. Machete. I can't take this picture seriously I keep thinking of him repelling with a mans small intestines. O.o

[–]thugmonkey 1 point2 points ago

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I have the weirdest boner.

[–]matthiasreddit 1 point2 points ago

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Such pretty eyes.

[–]Clothilde 1 point2 points ago

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A desktop pic should totally be made out of this. With some sort of platitude.

[–]thatguydointhatthing 1 point2 points ago

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He's like the Mexican Sammy Jackson. He's in everything but its always badass. Well...yea screw it this picture too.

[–]voodood23 1 point2 points ago

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I clicked this first over the link with a naked girl in it, thank you OP

[–]rodzzy1 1 point2 points ago

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thats mexi-CAN right thurr

[–]Theragon 1 point2 points ago

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And then he ate it.

[–]asnof 1 point2 points ago

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i think this belongs in nosleep

[–]Demiscourge 1 point2 points ago

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He lives in Austin and is a super nice guy. I used to see him walking down sixth street when I was a door guy and he always was smiling and would shake my hand. He is super short though...Still has plenty of swag

[–]STJRedstorm 1 point2 points ago

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It always bugs me that everyone in Hollywood get veneres; from Danny Trejo to RYan Seacrest. I think if you play a hard ass, it's pretty off-putting when you have perfectly veneered teeth.

[–]dominicanlou 1 point2 points ago

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he speaks at the aa and na meetings at my hotel and is one of the Nicest, most humble, scariest looking men I've ever met.

[–]UUDDLRLRBA 1 point2 points ago

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Photography Directed by John Woo

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Finding out he was 5'5 was one of the biggest shocks of my life.

[–]dylan89 1 point2 points ago

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The custodian in Modern Family!

[–]LYL_Homer 1 point2 points ago

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Ok boss, I guess we're doin' this.

[–]ifinallycaved 1 point2 points ago

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his teeth are oddly perfect

[–]kieonsegg 1 point2 points ago

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For some of you who may not know, he plays a character in the TV series Sons of Anarchy. Here's a trailer for season 4. Unreal show, check it out.

[–]roxtoby 1 point2 points ago

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his smile is ADORABLE

[–]IHv2RtrnSumVdeotapes 1 point2 points ago

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What a cute.... dove.

[–]dricc4 1 point2 points ago

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Tortuga.

[–]supermanlycool 1 point2 points ago

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hey cool my name is danny

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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What is Danny doing with his right hand?

[–]wheresmysmokes 1 point2 points ago

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Came home from work on my anniversary to this: http://imgur.com/njeEF I thought he was way funnier before I saw this post.

[–]igbok 1 point2 points ago

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first thought -- "has it really been that long since Hey Dude?"

[–]headscratchie 1 point2 points ago

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fuck yeah! Danny with doves makes me feel all squidgy inside

[–]invioletlight 1 point2 points ago

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At first I thought this was a r/ladyboners post.

[–]ScotteeMC 1 point2 points ago

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[–]el_oyente 1 point2 points ago

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Don't want this to come off as "gay," but I love the color of his eyes. Nevermind, fuck that, I hope it comes off as totally gay.

[–]CrackerEvan 1 point2 points ago

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I really want to turn this into a poster and hang it over my TV while I watch Machete.

[–]Number60000 1 point2 points ago

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He's such a bad ass scary looking guy, I want to be his friend! Cause you know he's probably the nicest guy in the world

[–]evadestruction 1 point2 points ago

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i love the smile on this guy, usually you see him looking so mean

[–]Turelliax 1 point2 points ago

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I met him in the elevator at Rock N shock in Massachusetts a few years back.. he was an elevator door ninja! He was super nice and a lot shorter then i thought he would be.

[–]Angeeclectic 1 point2 points ago

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My grandma knows this guy, apparently she brought him to my moms house for a BBQ one day... No joke!

[–]devoutchristian 1 point2 points ago

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As a foreigner, the American obsession with celebrities freaks me out.

[–]Bezulba 1 point2 points ago

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This guy is the best example that a former convict can rehabilitate himself and be a productive member of society, instead of having every drug runner jailed for life...

[–]mrJigglez 1 point2 points ago

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From spy kids to machete, the coolest mother fucker on tv

[–]teabagsallday 1 point2 points ago

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From Dusk To Creeper..

[–]whiteshirtredtie 1 point2 points ago

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He looks so happy here!

[–]otiswrath 1 point2 points ago

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In almost all his movies they shoot him so he looks huge, he is actually only like 5'9". Same with Stallone and Arnold.