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WTF

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top 200 commentsshow all 434

[–]prototypical 231 points232 points ago

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This is ridiculous. Obviously he should have worn a business snake to the interview.

[–]MaximumParsimony 46 points47 points ago*

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Exactly.

What the fuck is this.... "Casual Snake Friday" or some shit?

When you go in to an interview, they don't fucking care if it is casual Friday or not, your potential employers want to see you know how to wear a FORMAL SNAKE through your 9cm lip hardware. Even if you are not going to be wearing it all the time in your job, they want to see that you can, and that you care enough about the interview to do so.

Corn snake? Really? Maybe if you're applying for an assistant manager job at Arby's.

[–]json1 10 points11 points ago

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Corn Snakes are for hillbillies, Green pythons are the way to go, especially with the juxtaposition of his red hair

[–]HailPresidentSkroob 364 points365 points ago

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Ah yes, the ever-lasting job stopper.

[–]eatsox117 44 points45 points ago

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Ever-lasting job stopper?!?

[–]HailPresidentSkroob 106 points107 points ago

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Yes, Slugworth has been after the recipe for months.

[–]TheDroopy 33 points34 points ago

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You can take the plugs out and they never get any smaller! At least I don't think they do.

[–]brantdolve 11 points12 points ago

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I've never seen anyone over 40 with those so I'm guessing they die young.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points ago

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They do get smaller in the ear region. The lip is questionable. But really how many people do that for there to be a study?!

[–]AFemalePerspective 16 points17 points ago

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Then it will resemble a sleeve of a wizzard.

[–]toasthaxx0r 6 points7 points ago

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Or the mouth of a tired dog

[–]daychilde 4 points5 points ago

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wizzard

Like Rincewind?

[–]Market69 5 points6 points ago

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General rule of thumb is when the jewelry is removed it will shrink by about half over time.

[–]DownvoteAttractor 11 points12 points ago

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*rule of ear

[–]osmosisjones 4 points5 points ago

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But that picture stays the same size.

[–]RonaldWazlib 2 points3 points ago

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Up to around 6mm on your earlobe will generally return back to its first pierced size. Learned that during my 'rebellious, angsty teenager' phase. :p

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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Plugworth*

[–]Phallic 29 points30 points ago

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Protip: People heavily into the body-mod scene probably aren't looking for cubicle jobs, and can probably find employment in all sorts of "alternative" venues.

I don't understand this need reddit has to say "HA HA good luck getting an office job like me when you look different to me!"

[–]Flapjack_ 172 points173 points ago

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Mostly because it just looks fucking retarded

[–]Phallic -1 points0 points ago

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TYL that different people have different ideas about body aesthetics.

[–]Flapjack_ 74 points75 points ago

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TIL that it's still fucking retarded

[–]register-THIS 8 points9 points ago

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Upvote for consistency!

[–]SwampySoccerField 8 points9 points ago

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All things aside it is an incredibly bizarre behavior when contrasted to our modern mainstream culture. A lot of people who have jarring body modifications, in my experience, are incredibly accepting people though. That aside its pretty normal to knock on strange behaviors even if it isn't the kindest thing to do.

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points ago

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You can try to excuse this with "people have different tastes".

But it still looks fucking dumb.

[–]I_Mansplain_SRS_Beef 10 points11 points ago

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I came here to do my job, but then I looked at your comment history and saw that virtually everything you post is intended to make other people feel bad about themselves.

I mean, obviously, my raison d'etre isn't exactly warm and fuzzy, but good god... all your activity on the site pages and pages of vicious attacks on other people.

I just feel bad for you.

[–]Taniwha_NZ 5 points6 points ago

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So... I see you are named for the things most likely to share your intelligence level.

I actually wrote a little treatise on your apparent reluctance to allow anyone to think differently from you. But then I realised you were just a halfwit bigot.

[–]sketchasketch 1 point2 points ago

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You slayed him, I'm sorry for your downvotes although it really does look dumb

[–]Taniwha_NZ 4 points5 points ago

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Yes. I don't really think 'retarded' is the right description for this guy. Perhaps 'cuntface'.

The days when this would kill a cubicle job are long, long behind us, at least in some countries. Because they've seen it all before.

For example, England and most of Western Europe had to put up with tons of respectable office workers, schoolkids et cetera turning into lunatics almost overnight, deciding to pierce their own faces and other parts with safety-pins. This was going on way back in the stone age, around 1978 onwards.

I remember seeing punks in London in lots of office-worker-type jobs, wearing the corporate uniform, but with the hairstyle and the facial pins and chains that make it pretty obvious what you do in the evenings.

So, youth of today, nobody thinks you're clever, and nobody thinks you're being original, either. As my mother would say.

[–]throwish 44 points45 points ago

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Gets "alternative job". Blames everyone but self for no available insurance for reconstructive surgery and self-inflicted immune system degradation.

[–]zaferk 11 points12 points ago

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I am the 99%!

[–]dirtymoney 3 points4 points ago

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Like what? Working in a tattoo parlor or as a jizz-mopper in the stroke-booths at the local adult book store?

[–]RXisHere 10 points11 points ago

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Alternative jobs definately dont pay too well on average..

[–]Phallic 0 points1 point ago

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I imagine that people who are into that sort of body-modification don't aspire to be as rich as possible, and probably have other dreams.

Some people think life is all about piling up the biggest stack of gold, some people don't.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Then they can stop complaining about not having health insurance.

[–]cadencehz 1 point2 points ago

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Some people want to have savings to retire with at a reasonable age. Some people are stupid.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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In rebuttal, there are actually people who think they deserve office jobs despite their piercings and tattoos.

http://www.change.org/petitions/include-body-modification-in-equal-opportunity-employment

[–]temp45645 4 points5 points ago

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For the sake of argument, what exactly is the problem with a heavily modified working in an office? You just don't want to have to see it?

[–]alcoholland 5 points6 points ago

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Many customers/clients would feel extremely uncomfortable with someone who looks like this. It could cost you business that way hence dress codes in the workplace.

[–]jonasshoop 7 points8 points ago

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A person who modifies visible parts of their body shows a lack of common sense, a need to be noticed, and possibly mental issues depending on how much and what type of body modification is done.

[–]supersauce 1 point2 points ago

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The infections are the worst part. Smelly bacteria from self-inflicted wounds can be off-putting and knowing that they'll touch things with their nasty hands can be counter-productive.

[–]Arternative1 1 point2 points ago

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One thing is for sure, he will never be a straw tester.

[–]koryrok 1 point2 points ago

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They aren't looking for cubicle jobs because they know they've got a snowballs chance in hell of landing one... not because they don't want one.

[–][deleted] 195 points196 points ago

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So tell me, do you have any experience with putting a snake through your lip?

You do?

Get the fuck out.

[–]RobBobLoblaw 53 points54 points ago

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I'm sorry. You're over qualified. We were just looking for someone who can put snakes through their ears. Keep looking though.

[–]BertrandLoganberry 12 points13 points ago

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He has a future in the porn industry.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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oh... oh no...

[–]dangerbirds 40 points41 points ago

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You sir are just the type of guy we are looking for, just a (nsfw) handshake to seal the deal

[–]black_prince 34 points35 points ago

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Took me awhile to figure out why that was NSFW.

Thought process:

1 - Uhhh. What's NSFW? Guy has bands on hand. That one looks kinda flesh coloured. Maybe that's his flesh pulled back? Nope.

2 - What does that text say? Transscrotals? So, balls?

3 - I'm not seeing balls around here. The only balls that could really be seen on the camera would be the guy in th-- OMG WTF BBQ.

[–]MNice 18 points19 points ago

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Wow! Thanks to you, I was able to understand the picture as soon as I opened it.

It's like reading the assigned text before going to lecture.

[–]SpectralRH 4 points5 points ago

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I still don't get what I'm supposed to see?

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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I just looked into it. Modblog clearly refers to a body modding site.

So I thought "He clearly has his ball sack modded".

Yep, the guy on the right is wearing middle guys scrotum on his arm through the black body modding ring.

[–]poopypantsn 1 point2 points ago

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alright man, concentrate on the white guyys scrotum, and that flesh colored bracelot the guy in black has on, his hand is through his screotum!! [9=]

[–]imamidget 4 points5 points ago

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Even reading this I still didn't understand for awhile. When I figured it out, though, I wished I hadn't. DEAR GOD, WHY would anyone DO THAT?

[–]GordieLaChance 1 point2 points ago

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I need help finding the BBQ...is it behind the giant gaping pierced nutsac?

[–]black_prince 1 point2 points ago

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Have you ever watched Spaceballs? Do you remember when they went past lightspeed and into plaidspeed? (of course you know, looking at your username)

The BBQ is when the absurdity of it all went into plaidspeed.

[–]mrmunkey 3 points4 points ago

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"Awesome handshake guys. Now it's time for a beer" (NSFW)

[–]toasthaxx0r 3 points4 points ago

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"Hmmm, it looks as if those gentlemen are having a wonderfully boisterous time, why - look at that one on the right, he's throwing up the devil horns... and shaking the hand of the man on the left. And the man in the middle is just standing there with a funny look on his face....... OH GOD"

[–]toasthaxx0r 3 points4 points ago

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TIL there is a "transscrotal"

[–]unr3a1r00t 1 point2 points ago

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That shit had to hurt. I don't understand some people.

Also, I get the feeling I will receive flak for this, but why do the two gentlemen on either side of scrotal bracelet man in the middle look familiar to me?

[–]Shakakahn 245 points246 points ago

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Hello? Yes, I would like some attention please.

[–]FriendlyBassplayer 49 points50 points ago

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Anyone who disagrees with this comment is ignorant or lying

[–]MestR 19 points20 points ago

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I can't get attention by doing desirable things so I mess up my body so people have to notice me.

[–]ephemera505 1 point2 points ago

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Once people around him come to accept and ignore his modifications, he will then strive to find more extreme and shocking ways to get noticed. It's a never ending cycle.

[–]normalchick 41 points42 points ago

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This confuses me.

[–]Moh7 90 points91 points ago

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its a man who will never get a job and end up blaming the corporations (mannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn)

[–]mindaika 79 points80 points ago

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Honestly though, can you blame the corporations for not hiring a ginger?

[–]Dr_Gregory_House_MD 5 points6 points ago

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Because he's a rrrrrrreeeebbbeeelll!

[–]SuperTurtle 19 points20 points ago

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It's not me, it's the system trying to CHANGE me!

[–]theguywiththesnake 2 points3 points ago

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i am the guy in the picture and i actually do have a job with a multi million pound company i have an apartment by the sea and travel overseas at least twice a year, but thanks for your concern (mannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn)

[–]Reginald_Forman 5 points6 points ago

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Me too. Is that his upper or lower lip?

[–]ulzimate 9 points10 points ago*

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It looks like there's a whole HOLE under his lower lip, and that ring is holding open his mouth.

[–]chingyduster 4 points5 points ago

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a Whole under? whats that?

[–]ulzimate 1 point2 points ago

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Oops, hole. Or a whole hole.

[–]marburg 4 points5 points ago

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Can a hole be only partial? Oh dear, my brain.

[–]SpleeBeans 2 points3 points ago

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[–]EthicalReasoning 4 points5 points ago

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his parents grounded him once and he's still mad about it

[–]Lenn95 23 points24 points ago

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Fun Fact!: Reptiles can carry Salmonella so it's always recommended you don't stick them in your freaking mouth .

[–]zandstrax 2 points3 points ago

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But... its not IN his mouth its THROUGH his mouth, so... er... crisis averted?

[–]OFKNV 8 points9 points ago

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His mouth looks like an anus.

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points ago

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I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS PICTURE.

It's his upper lip. but. how is that possible... because... its... like.... FUCK MY BRAIN IS EXPLODING

EDIT: I FOUND AN EXPLANATION SORT OF http://modblog.bmezine.com/wp-content/uploads/200705210039-pix2.jpg

[–]ejhaile 11 points12 points ago

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dafuq

how do you talk or eat? or drink???? Just WHY???

[–]_Linear 10 points11 points ago

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I still can't get what's going on. It looks like he has a blowupdoll mouth or just one lip.

[–]DaZhoup 4 points5 points ago

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that's what i'm sayin.

[–]Arcon1337 5 points6 points ago

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Why would he want to do this? It's not even cool...

[–]chwilliam 3 points4 points ago

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That...cannot be healthy.

[–]chzplz 2 points3 points ago

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Lower lip, underbite, top lip either obscured or removed and transplanted to his penis.

[–]WazWaz 1 point2 points ago

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Ah, so in the OP image (left), what looks like a continuous pink ring of lip is actually hs upper and lower lips, with the top lip closed on the back of the metal band. Thanks!

[–]ejhaile 1 point2 points ago

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i found a friend of his

[–]Scuzwheedl0r 27 points28 points ago

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Salmonillllllllllla!

[–]LookAliveSunshine 1 point2 points ago

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Went looking through comment specifically to find if this had been said.

Job well done, sir.

[–]meowmeowmeowmeowmeo 5 points6 points ago

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Same here. I know you are always supposed to wash up after you handle any reptiles because of it, this definitely can't be advisable.

Also its Salmonella btw.

[–]autobotguy 4 points5 points ago

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I don't understand why someone as extreme as this is wearing a polo shirt? That is a major part of WTF for me.

[–]throwish 1 point2 points ago

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Everybody knows you don't go full Collins Syndrome.

[–]Vextion 20 points21 points ago

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You have something on your face...just there...no the other side.

Happy cake day too

[–]texacer[S] 15 points16 points ago

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[–]Scarjaka 108 points109 points ago

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[–]lastpersonshooter 17 points18 points ago

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Omg I laughed too fucking hard! Thank you!

[–]touchcoma 10 points11 points ago

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That gun looks really tiny.

[–]Mark_Farner 9 points10 points ago

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Lousy grip too. That piece is all over the place. He's clearly a lefty, and should have quit switching it up.

[–]SometimesAmusingGuy 1 point2 points ago

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BEST GIF EVER!

[–]Brandon_Storm 99 points100 points ago

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Funny pic, enjoy it while you can folks.

Soon this thread will turn into people talking about how he needed attention, will never get a job, heavily modified people saying they have jobs and getting ignored, a few jokes about putting padlocks through tunneled ears and then we'll all reconvene tomorrow in another piercing/tattoo thread.

See you then!

[–]nixonrichard 46 points47 points ago

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heavily modified people

I call them "former whistlers."

[–]chzplz 8 points9 points ago

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Pee-sitting-downers. When you start adding bonus holes into your cock, things get sprayey.

[–]NoMomo 12 points13 points ago

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I really liked the guy who said that he should've worn a business snake to the interview. An actual joke!

[–]headphonehalo 8 points9 points ago

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will never get a job

It has been about that since the very beginning. See the post's title.

[–]GordieLaChance 1 point2 points ago

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Can you pick some lottery numbers for me?

[–]wafflestomp 5 points6 points ago

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"MAAAA! MAAAA! LOOK A ME MAAAA! WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME LIKE OTHER MOTHERS! YOU SUCK! I HATE YOU!!!"

[–]ROBOT-DINOSAUR-NINJA 1 point2 points ago

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"daddy didn't give attention, and the boy was something mommy wouldn't wear"

[–]harmthellama 1 point2 points ago

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"King Jeremy the wicked, ruled his world"

[–]Inane_ramblings 5 points6 points ago

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Welcome to reddit. The never ending circle jerk. I tell you, the only place you can go for good content and discussion is the lesser known subs.

[–]drock66 3 points4 points ago

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Welcome to Reddit where the Karma doesn't matter and the circle jerks have a large circumference.

[–]chocobaby 5 points6 points ago

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Good ol' sphincter face!

[–]sphincter_face 4 points5 points ago

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Yes?

How may I help you?

(blatantly new novelty account, not gonna lie. I'm just in it for the lulz.)

[–]DaZhoup 2 points3 points ago

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respect.

[–]lemonade_brezhnev 2 points3 points ago

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Do people who have these wear them all the time? It seems incredibly impractical. Do they take them out to eat at least?

[–]avapoet 6 points7 points ago

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No. You have to take them out to let them shed their skin and stuff.

[–]fleetofrobots 1 point2 points ago

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A rare actual lol from reddit, than you sir/madam.

[–]trumpetloves 2 points3 points ago

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Even if you take them out, the hole won't shrink

[–]pepsi_logic 3 points4 points ago

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Please close your mouth. It's impolite to keep it open when you're not talking.

[–]CookieJarvis 4 points5 points ago

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My chapped lip split open the other day and still hurts like a bastard. I can't even imagine...

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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That is not appealing.

[–]skebei 2 points3 points ago

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He did that to get some girl somewhere.

[–]Moofies 3 points4 points ago

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Im really not certain what is happening in this picture but I am very uncomfortable.

[–]hannerbananer422 2 points3 points ago

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Damn, that is a huge nose.

[–]Seeker8833 2 points3 points ago

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Well their goes any hopes of fapping tonight...

[–]nepidae 2 points3 points ago

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Is that some sort of fetish blowup doll?

[–]h8bit 2 points3 points ago

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God, I hate humanity.

[–]AwkwardBug 2 points3 points ago

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I....i....was not prepared for that...

[–]paulfknwalsh 2 points3 points ago

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goddamn that is hideous. if i had ginger hair i'd never grow a beard.

[–]1lluminate 2 points3 points ago

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Hahah that guy looks different than most of us! What a pathetic loser!

[–]Blockley83 6 points7 points ago

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The position has been filled, send in the next gentleman on your way out.

[–]pyr4m1d 19 points20 points ago

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WTF has to be wrong with you to think that looks good?

I hope I never catch that disease.

[–]Pixshel 4 points5 points ago

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Is that a corn snake?

[–]tdgonex 2 points3 points ago

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Yep

[–]Ayenguyen 14 points15 points ago

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MOM, this is who I am!

[–]RiMiFi 6 points7 points ago

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10 years later - oh god why

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points ago

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It's funny how someone can try so hard to look unique and interesting and in the end it tells you how unbelievably uninteresting they are

[–]OxfordComma1019 7 points8 points ago

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I feel bad for the snake. It looks like it's trying to get the fuck out of there.

[–]Cskidge 8 points9 points ago

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anybody else notice that his lips look like a rolled up condom

[–]Borkz 5 points6 points ago

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Yup, enough that I Ctrl-F'd this.

[–]AskMeAboutMyScrotum 10 points11 points ago

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Hey!

HEY!

Look at me!

[–]PCsNBaseball 4 points5 points ago

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"Derp eyes" alert.

[–]merecido 4 points5 points ago

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Why oh why do people put tinker toys in their ears/lips.

[–]WTF_Regulator69 6 points7 points ago

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I like it.

[–]ChemicalT 1 point2 points ago

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Kah-hmm.. Sir... You seem to be drooling a bit.. through your lip.

[–]CoyotyDave 1 point2 points ago

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If he can manage that, he can manage anything.

[–]immorta1 1 point2 points ago

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First time something on wtf has made me say "what the Fuuuck".

[–]NotoriousArab 1 point2 points ago

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Is that a human?

[–]MuEtaJenkins 1 point2 points ago

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"So, I'm Mr. Manager now?"

"No, Son, just 'Manager."

[–]CoreyRogerson 1 point2 points ago

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Imagine how terrible spaghetti must be for this guy.

[–]iseezombies 1 point2 points ago

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That dude is getting salmonella.

[–]bornagainredditor 1 point2 points ago

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Had this been posted in a body mod sub, people would bitching, What's wrong with that, it's his body.

What's wrong, he looks like fucking mental patient that should be recycled.

[–]reagan2016 1 point2 points ago

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This is what people look like when they express themselves.

[–]Yukenna 1 point2 points ago

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Poor little corn snake...

[–]katieM 10 points11 points ago*

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So, when he's 50 and still jobless, do you think he'll wonder at what point in his life did he choose unwisely?

[–]Gnorris 19 points20 points ago

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As yet another spoonful of Lucky Charms takes the plunge through his bottom lip and into his lap.

[–]Tensuke 4 points5 points ago

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Shit, I really want some lucky charms now.

[–]Captain_Generous 1 point2 points ago

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I can picture that...50 years old, sitting at the table all alone. Goes to take a bite, and it falls through his lip.

His eyes well up. "Why IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME! WHY WONT IT GO IN MY MOOOUTH!"

[–]mitt-romney 1 point2 points ago

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Why IB DIS HABBENIG TO ME! WHY WONT IY GO EEN MY MOOOUF!

FTFY

[–]timesync 4 points5 points ago

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and dribbling his cereal through the whole in his face...

[–]WazWaz 1 point2 points ago

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Cruel but funny.

[–]Axana 13 points14 points ago*

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Stop with the "He'll never get a job!" comments. Anyone who takes that body modding that far has no interest in a traditional 9-5 work environment, so it's a moot point. He still has plenty of employment options in tattoo shops, head shops, bartending, road crew/stage crew, and freelancing. Hell, even retail shops would probably hire him to stock shelves at night.

[–]Sieziggy 19 points20 points ago

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So long as he doesn't complain about "the man" denying him a good job because he's not a conformist, I really don't give a shit about how much he fucks up his face.

[–]Bthulhu 0 points1 point ago

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Why would you give a shit even then?

[–]Sieziggy 3 points4 points ago

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Because people like that are annoying, to me at least.

[–]macromolecule 2 points3 points ago

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You're absolutely right, the snake's acute sense of touch gives him a leg up on bar-tending stunts; he'd be a shoe-in for any Hooters in the country.

[–]buckulus 1 point2 points ago

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Yeah, i actually know this guy and he busts his nut working long hours making alloys for cars..

Surprised they wen't for such a normal picture of him

[–]nilleftw 1 point2 points ago

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Why is this being downvoted so much? If you see an image like this and think "Boy, that one's not getting a job anytime soon", you're a boring person.

[–]contranigma 4 points5 points ago

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He can put his penis through his lip.

[–]diggemigre 26 points27 points ago

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There will be a penis but I doubt it will be his.

[–]jonr 2 points3 points ago

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Sir, please no pets during the interview!

[–]fifthconcerto 1 point2 points ago

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He will never find a job! Gingers don't fare well in this economy.

[–]tronn4 3 points4 points ago

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Office Depot is always on the look out for people of your caliber sir!

[–]InvariantD 3 points4 points ago

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Welp.

[–]helpmeiminnocent 4 points5 points ago

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Who the fuck would think this is a good idea?

[–]karolinamaria 4 points5 points ago

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what but why would you i don't no

[–]karolinamaria -1 points0 points ago

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sorry, this picture made me lose my capacity for sentence structure.

[–]MintyClinch 3 points4 points ago

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that's too bad

[–]Trolll_here 1 point2 points ago

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When you look like this, you start to wonder where they went wrong in life.

"Some people are still alive just because its illegal to kill them."

[–]akorn22 0 points1 point ago

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Ooohhh what a badass. a big bad corn snake!

[–]forhorglingrads 1 point2 points ago

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may as well have been a cornback snake

[–]Some_Africans 1 point2 points ago

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WOW! His lips are bigger than mine.

[–]SpineBuster 1 point2 points ago

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I bet that guy rips ass as loud as he is ugly.

[–]Xeasar 1 point2 points ago

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Upvoted because of the title.

[–]Chemowsky 1 point2 points ago

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I want to have sex with that mouth.

[–]dracothedragon21 0 points1 point ago

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my brother has a snake just like that!

[–]Shin-LaC 6 points7 points ago

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In his face?

[–]MdxBhmt 4 points5 points ago

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my brother has a face just like that!

[–]noyurawk 8 points9 points ago

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In his snake?

[–]UrbnBLINK 2 points3 points ago

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Perfect title.

[–]viralcode 1 point2 points ago

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corn snake: okeetee phase/potential albino color morph. maybe 1-2 years old. the human in the picture? someone who's genetics are of no importance once i remove his balls for this example of stupidity.

[–]Chavva 1 point2 points ago

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Upvote for the title. Well in!

[–]lasveganon -1 points0 points ago

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Oh man, awesome title.