this post was submitted on
1,289 points (57% like it)
5,218 up votes 3,929 down votes

atheism

subscribe1,259,746 readers

2,059 users here now


Welcome to r/atheism, the web's largest atheist forum. All topics related to atheism, agnosticism and secular living are welcome here. Please read our FAQ.

Please link directly to any images or use imgur to avoid being flagged as blogspam

Recommended reading and viewing

Thank you notes


Related Subreddits <--the big list

GodlessWomen YoungAtheists AtheistParents
BlackAtheism AtheistGems DebateAnAtheist
skeptic agnostic freethought
antitheism humanism Hitchens
a6theism10 tfbd AdviceAtheists
AtheistVids atheismbot secularstudents

Events
10/5-6 NAPCON2012 - Boston
11/9-11 Skepticon - Springfield MO
3/28-31 AA Convention - Austin
Giving
DWB/MSF fundraiser
Kiva lending team
FBB's Appeal to Freethinkers to Fight Cancer
Camp Quest
Ex* Groups
ex-Muslim ex-Catholic ex-Mormon
ex-JW ex-Jew ex-SistersinZion
ex-Bahai ex-Christian ex-Adventist
Assistance
Coming Out
Atheist Havens
Start an Atheist Club at Your School

Chat: #reddit-atheism on irc.freenode.net

Watch: #/r/atheism on reddit.tv

Read The FAQ


Submit Rage Comic

Submit Facebook Chat

Submit Meme

Submit Something Else

Read The FAQ

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

all 112 comments

[–]UlquiorraSchiffer 53 points54 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

"This book doesn't have any answers!" - Homer Simpson on The Bible, The Simpsons Movie

[–]danmalo82 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

First thing that popped into my head was that line.

[–]jooes 19 points20 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

"Grandma, you weren't even alive during World War 2... So you've never met Hitler, and despite what you may think, he most certainly was not a nice guy..."

I have to say this almost every time I visit my grandma. She's crazy.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

One of Hitlers housekeepers said, after the war, that Adolf was the nicest person she had ever met.

[–]TracyJackson 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

It was hard to meet nice persons in Nazi Germany.

[–]sTiKyt 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

It's easy to be nice when you're dead.

[–]UlquiorraSchiffer 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I don't know. To be nice I tried playing dead at work, but the customers just thought I was actually dead.

[–]jooes 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Yeah, too bad the whole "slaughtered millions of people for no reason" kind of overshadows that.

I tried to explain that to my grandma too... She still thinks we should have teamed up with Germany...

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Are you disputing that she said this?

[–]jooes 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Which part? The part where my grandma is a Nazi, or the part where Hitlers housekeeper said he was a nice guy?

If it's the second part, she might have said that, I don't know... But Hitler was still a pretty big dick. I don't think there's any denying that.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

How do you know how he conducted himself in private? Have you read biographies on Hitler that said he conducted his private business like a dick?

[–]jooes 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Are you seriously going to try to argue that Hitler was a nice guy?

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Does the idea offend you that he might have been a nice guy in his personal life? I don't know if it is true, all I'm saying is that it doesn't sound like you know either.

[–]aescalante 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

In my opinion, all the good things that he did are vastly overshadowed by all the bad things that he did.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

That doesn't stop him from being nicer or more charismatic than any of us.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

wow, you went off the deep end there, buddy. he was a psychopath/sociopath, so clearly would have the ability to be charming when he wanted to.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Was Hitler ever really considered an actual psychopath/sociopath? I mean medically, is it an accurate description of him?

[–]jooes -2 points-1 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I don't think how he was in his personal life really matters at all here... People who commit genocide aren't nice people, no matter what angle you look at them...

"Hey, that guy killed millions of people! Oh, wait a minute... It says here that he went home and he was a nice guy and his housekeeper liked him... Well, I guess it's all forgiven!"... Doesn't really work that way...

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Well, I guess it's all forgiven

So far, no one has said that, except you.

[–]pikindaguy 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I have no doubt about this, think of the biggest dicks you've ever met in real life--they probably are as nice to their grandmothers, moms, sisters, etc. as anyone else.

[–]scrambles57 95 points96 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Has anyone at a church ever suggested a new book to read? It is essentially a book club, but they've been discussing the same book for so many years.

[–]GiPwner 85 points86 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

To be fair, clearly they don't actually read the book at all, else none of them would be there.

[–]forgeSHIELD 15 points16 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

How often to you see someone listen to a song and miss the point, but keep listening to it because it has a catchy melody/chorus? People do that with reading too.

There are also the people who have read it, but desire a professional interpretation. They could also simply enjoy hearing about it.

[–]spherexenon 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

the fact remains that they don't know the Bible as well as your average atheist, especially the horrific parts that help our case!

[–]forgeSHIELD 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

One could make the argument that the average atheist seeks out the horrific points in the bible just as the average christian seeks out the wholesome parts of it. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder after all. You, I'm sure, have found something that inspires you to do good and something that gives you a sense of self worth. Religious folks just happen to find it in religion/other activities they may be involved in.

Of course this is not to say that everyone is inspired to do good after reading the bible, but not everyone sees a puppy or kitten and says, "aww," either. You can't always blame the book. A lot of times its the interpreter who is at fault

[–]ccutler69 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

To be fair though the horrific parts aren't that hard to find, they are everywhere.

[–]prezjordan 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The fact remains that they don't care. What's the issue with my mother going to church and praying? There isn't any issue. I don't follow the same principles as her, but I know it makes her strive to be a better person and help others - not to mention it helps her get through the hard parts of life. She doesn't hurt anyone. Why does it matter that she hasn't studied the bible word for word?

[–]ccutler69 -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

It matters if you care if your beliefs are true.

[–][deleted] ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[deleted]

[–]prezjordan 10 points11 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

They're telling her to be a bigot? I don't live in the deep south or anything, but there's nothing extreme about the church my mother attends. And charging her for it? She donates $5 every Sunday at her own will. She also bakes things ever food drive and buys gifts for the less fortunate every holiday season. I'm sorry but I just don't see this as a bad thing.

It works for her. I don't need a big church to do good for others - but it works for her.

[–]yep45 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Yeah, its not like the people who read it the mosts are priests or anything.

[–]radiomonkey20 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Or they're so enamoured with the idea of a permanent guardian that they're willing to disregard the truly gross and appalling passages.

[–]GiPwner 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

They must have no imagination then either, since even I could create a better one than their book describes.

[–]deejayalemus 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]evilGUI 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Sure they do... they try to get you to buy their terribly written books that they charge you $50+ for on how to get right with god and how not to have any fun :/

[–]OmegaArcadia 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Twilight.

[–]toanjo 8 points9 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Nah, the bible is still a better love story.

[–]lahwran_ 1 point2 points ago*

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

edit: okay, maybe I wouldn't

I dunno, I think I'd recommend twilight over the bible ...

[–]bardfaust 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Dude, the bible is epic as fuck. Pagan sacrifice, giants, warfare, genocide, madness, intrigue, rape, mutilation, incest, murder, schizophrenia, dragons, demons, spirits, magic, betrayal, torture, bestiality, sodomy, divine intervention, witchcraft, drug and alcohol use, and much more.

[–]lahwran_ 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

point taken.

[–]greenwood90 11 points12 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

one of the better moments from new simpsons

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

i wonder if Nancy Cartwright (who gave $10m to scientology in one year) ever gets a flash of hypocrisy, or cognitive dissonance, when reading these lines.

[–]UlquiorraSchiffer 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Cognitive Dissonance seems to be the most often suppressed reaction in human history.

[–]BSMitchell 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I feel like a scientologist probably isn't too concerned about dissonance or things making sense.

[–][deleted] ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[deleted]

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

did i say that? scientology makes claims about historic aspects of the earth, was my comparison.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Scientology tries not to think of itself as a 'religion', but a 'way of thinking.'

It helps with the cognitive dissonance.

[–]Thrasymachus7 8 points9 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This is so true. Every holiday that I see my grandpa he talks about fighting in World War II and killing Nazis. All he did was regularly get drunk at some bar in France and never enter combat at all.

[–][deleted] ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[deleted]

[–]dundavetta 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

eh, this may be over personalized...

[–]smackaroni 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]twan398 2 points3 points ago*

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Bart is too worried about his thetan level.

[–]TrueAmurrican 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I hope you all don't feel this way about your grandparents... They have more to share than most people, and you'll be sad you didn't get more time to hear their ridiculous stories once they pass away. I wear my grandpas wedding ring every day. I miss that man!

[–]burntsoap 6 points7 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Thats how I feel about Ron Paul

[–]Arcnsparc 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

repost

[–]followedbytidalwaves 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

just because it's a repost doesn't mean everyone here has seen it before

[–]ilovegeorgebush 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

We can't bust heads like we used to. But we have our ways. One trick is to tell stories that don't go anywhere. Like the time I caught the ferry to Shelbyville. I needed a new heel for m'shoe. So I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt. Which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. Gimme five bees for a quarter, you'd say. Now where was I... oh yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion tied to my belt, which was the style at the time. You couldn't get white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones...

[–]JoMac69 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Just read this and the episode just came on the tv!

What a remarkable coincidence.

[–]leviticus11 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Haha this isn't a-theism so much as a-oldpeople 0_o

[–]WkE 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

So true. This is how I feel when I see my grandpa. It's hard to tell when he's lying though, he believes all his stories are 100% true. Gotta love the crazy old man though.

[–]thefourthhouse 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Even further proof there is no god! The Simpsons said so! Take that Christian-scum!

Submitter you are so brave.

[–]EvilAnagram 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Bart didn't say, "yea," he said, "Yeah." They are two different words. "Yea" sounds like "yay" and is the antonym of "nay." "Yeah" is an informal word for yes, while "yea" is an overly formal and very outdated word for yes or indeed. They're similar, but they're not the same.

[–]BSMitchell 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Heil grammar nazi!

[–]CommunistFodder 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

nice

[–]goodwolf 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Why do the Simpsons even go to church anymore? They clearly don't care. And Lisa is Buddhist.

[–]Sachinism 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Saw this episode on tv today.

[–]LethalAppetite 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You spelled "Yeah" wrong. Am I the only one is annoyed by this common misspelling?

"Yea" is pronounced the same as "yay." Think back to old timey people asking questions, "are you with us, yea or nay?"

[–]Scary_Monster 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I almost forgot how awesome The Simpsons is

[–]Down_Vote_MachineV2 -5 points-4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This show is still running?

[–][deleted] ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[deleted]

[–]pistolpeatear 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

but...but...this is my favorite circle jerk

[–]ajwhitla 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

"Welcome to r/atheism, the web's largest atheist forum. All topics related to atheism, agnosticism and secular living are welcome here."

A comment in a TV show about atheism seems to fit. So yeah, r/atheism is in fact a circlejerk in the sense that r/atheism talks about atheism. Just like aww is such a circlejerk for posting cute pictures and /tf2 constantly circlejerks over tf2.

[–]IntentionalOffensive -3 points-2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

And this is why I hate The Simpsons. There are only a small handful of devout christian characters, and they're all portrayed in a manner unbefitting a man of god. The Simpsons has been spreading lies to our children for years and I think it's time this was stopped.

[–]lilyrose980 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Well,dont look to TV to provide your children with advice on how to live if you believe that strongly ,quit trolling!

[–]BSMitchell 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

If you have young kids watching The Simpsons you're doing it wrong. Get some parenting skills.

[–][deleted] ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[deleted]

[–]StaplerAttack 3 points4 points ago*

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

There is no quest to rid the world of religion.... but that sounds like a good idea, i vote for dawkins to lead.

[–]FPP-EMERGEN-C -4 points-3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Go kill yourself you atheist fuck, have fun rotting in Hell

[–]followedbytidalwaves 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Now that doesn't sound very Christian, does it?

[–]jadlink -2 points-1 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I would have given anything to end up with a girl like 'Jo' Polniaczek or Blair Warner. Even 'Tootie' Ramsey was a sexy little piece of rollerskating chocolate that I would have been happy with. But in the end I ended up with Natalie. The chubby sidekick. Fuck. At least she is better than ending up with Miss Edna Garrett.

[–]Smithpoint0 -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

so true.