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top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]Valerim 924 points925 points ago

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Looks like "Blade" if Wesley Snipes played a dog-walker instead of a daywalker.

[–]orangeslash[S] 213 points214 points ago

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Woulda made an awesome sequel.

[–]etherealcaitiff 15 points16 points ago

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Spayed

[–]FriarNurgle 8 points9 points ago*

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Starring Bob Barker

*edited for incorrect use of "Staring" instead of "Starring". Please forgive me.

[–]pattyhax 190 points191 points ago

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Can we please not encourage another god damn blade sequel.

[–]neyvit 162 points163 points ago

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I thought they were fun movies. Would you rather have more Twilight vampires or more Blade vampires?

[–]phys1cs 255 points256 points ago

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Both. In the same movie.

[–]zyzzogeton 149 points150 points ago

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Yes, as we have seen, that would be awesome. Some motherfucker is always trying to ice skate uphill

[–]yousedditreddit 29 points30 points ago

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do they not know how to wear sweaters and jackets?

[–]Yogi8BooBoo 13 points14 points ago

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I just could not quit laughing.. made my day

[–]zyzzogeton 6 points7 points ago

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I would credit the original author if I knew who they were... thanks for your awesomeness photoshop phantom!

[–]balanceofpower 7 points8 points ago

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[–][deleted] 14 points15 points ago

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Fuck you. Blade is awesome.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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Can we please encourage Kris Kristofferson to be in another Blade sequel?

[–]maverickrenegade 11 points12 points ago

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In his defense, Blade II was almost ok.

[–]atlgeek007 64 points65 points ago

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Blade 3 was made okay by the line "cock juggling thundercunt"

[–]wave517 37 points38 points ago

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and don't forget "and unlike typical vampires, her fangs are located in her vagina."

[–]atlgeek007 38 points39 points ago

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I'll amend my statement:

Blade 3 was made okay by the presence of Ryan Reynolds and whoever wrote his lines.

[–]wave517 6 points7 points ago

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[–]lizzindc 11 points12 points ago

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Basically any line delivered by Ryan Reynolds made that movie better, especially if there was a Wesley Snipes bitchface reaction shot afterwards.

[–]diadem 5 points6 points ago

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Would Cesar Malian be a hero or villain?

[–]Blitztwist 17 points18 points ago

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See what im doing to blade? Im not being aggressive im being dominant.

[–]down_vote_magnet 24 points25 points ago

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"I promise you, you'll be walked by dawn."

[–]BeezowPooPoo_ZGopGop 14 points15 points ago

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Blade is on FX right now if anyone is interested.

[–]webby_mc_webberson 19 points20 points ago

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Looks like "Blade" if Wesley Snipes was blind and all his seeing-eye dogs were blind, too.

[–]Firenine 2 points3 points ago

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Does he really need two watches to beat up vampires? We might have stumbled upon the "true" weakness of vampires!

[–]I_wwebsite 3 points4 points ago

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Sounds like a Chappel Show skit that I want to see.

[–]Scoobydude 497 points498 points ago

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Here is him again but with a parrot outside Dragoncon!

[–]OutInTheBlack 151 points152 points ago

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This dude is there every year and those dogs are incredibly well behaved. I remember another passer-by mentioning that they're all rescues and he takes very good care of them. They just chill outside the mall/Marta station letting people take pictures.

[–]Tiver 39 points40 points ago

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From 2 photos it certainly looks like well behaved dogs. Awesome that he's taking care of them and training them so well.

[–]OutInTheBlack 16 points17 points ago

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I'm pretty sure they're American bulldogs (or very well fed pit bulls). Either way they're remarkably easy to train and are big ol' Teddy bears for the most part. This batch of pups love the attention and ham it up for the cameras big time.

[–]Giroro_Gocho 36 points37 points ago

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Which is why they're so popular as fighting dog. No matter how badly you mistreat them, they'll stay loyal to you. It's pretty sad.

I remember watching a dog fighting video, the dog was getting overwhelm and started backing down. The guy just starts going "come on, get up, you can do it, come on". The dog perked right up, tail waging, started going at it again.

[–]volklskiier 64 points65 points ago

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I'm sad now...

[–]CSec064 27 points28 points ago

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go look up footage from the Puppy Bowl! :>

[–]volklskiier 14 points15 points ago

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Will do for at least 4 hours

[–]Thunderjugs 6 points7 points ago

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I wish more people understood that. Dog fighters can't use a breed of dog that can turn against them at any moment which is why they use the pit bull. They are people pleasers which makes them easy to train.

[–]DELTATKG 68 points69 points ago

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So... does this guy just hang out outside with random animals all the time?

[–]Scoobydude 116 points117 points ago

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When I saw him he was collecting donations for the Atlanta Humane Society.

[–]FiniteCircle 52 points53 points ago

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Goddamn this guy gets more respect from me with each niblet of information that I learn of him.

[–]avalose 40 points41 points ago

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I'm now going to strive for this.

[–]orangeslash[S] 221 points222 points ago

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Goddamn. I've never envied one person's life more.

[–]yourenotmydad 117 points118 points ago

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wait til he has to pick up dog shit though.

[–]hmahadik 375 points376 points ago

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Dogs who wear sunglasses can take care of their own shit.

[–]hogimusPrime 62 points63 points ago*

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As a former sunglass-wearing dog, I can confirm this. This man clearly knows of what he speaks.

Ruff.

[–]TheVenetianMask 17 points18 points ago

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[–]tekchik 2 points3 points ago

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Yea that must be ruff.

[–]tetsuo9000 19 points20 points ago

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I saw him! I was waiting to see Carrie Fischer and it was about to rain and there he was with his parrot! Wow, small world....

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points ago

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That's really clever actually. I remember watching a Jay Leno interview with Carrie Fischer like 10 years ago and she brought her pet parrot or talked about it or something, probably because she hasn't had a Job in 30 years and had nothing else to talk about.

[–]TheAmazingWJV 12 points13 points ago

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With a parrot, awkward silences are double awkward.

[–][deleted] 65 points66 points ago

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RAWWWKK DOUBLE AWKWARD

[–]firebadmattgood 7 points8 points ago

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Carrie Fischer has actually had a successful career of editing screenplays and stage acting over the past 10-15 years.

[–]GOP4ME 4 points5 points ago

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to be more accurate, Carrie Fisher has spent her time making BANK as an A-list Hollyood script doctor. A six-figure A WEEK part-time gig. Not bad work if you're the 1 in a million who can get it...

[–]jonesin4info 27 points28 points ago

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Holy crap, I was gonna ask if that dude is in Atlanta, but I guess he is. I think he was my Middle School Odyssey of the Mind teacher. He was really eccentric and liked to go by the moniker "Cassius Caligula", no joke. I wish I could remember his name... I want to say it was something Lassiter, but I have no idea. It would not surprise me in the least if this is that dude considering he is, in fact, in Atlanta.

[–]stojakapimp 13 points14 points ago

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Well his shirt does say Cassius Caligula on it, so I'm guessing you're right. Unless of course that's where you got that name from...

[–]jonesin4info 6 points7 points ago

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The shirt is the reason my mind went to Atlanta, not the surroundings. That including the sheer eccentricity of this dude and his similarity to my old teacher just made me make the connection. I'm trying to find out where he could have possibly bought these shirts online. If he made them himself it HAS to be my old teacher.

[–]lstcaress 6 points7 points ago

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[–]string97bean 138 points139 points ago

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How does he keep the glasses on the dogs? Mine would always rip that shit off in two seconds.

[–]webby_mc_webberson 172 points173 points ago

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Super glue.

[–]neyvit 80 points81 points ago

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That's...depressing.

[–]farceur318 244 points245 points ago

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Less depressing than staples.

[–]Xenc 64 points65 points ago

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What's wrong with staples? I buy all of my stationary from there.

[–]akatherder 23 points24 points ago

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stationery

[–]SIMAFOL 37 points38 points ago*

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Probably these. They and the 'dog shoes' got really popular during the clean-up of the World Trade Center. The search and rescue dogs they were using were always getting their pads bloody and debris in their eyes.

*EDIT: Crap, he's using normal sunglasses with a traditional band! Based on this pic from KnowsWhatTheySay below.

[–]Strikersquad 12 points13 points ago

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Hmm, yea looks like rubberband, probably helps deter the dogs from barking at random people on top of adding to the cool factor.

[–]ReneBelloq 2 points3 points ago

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No way this rubber band would stop the dog from barking, it's not strong enough.

Besides ,you need to work hard on a dog so he won't just take the glasses off, I'm guessing he trained them not to bark too.

[–]casius-caligula 67 points68 points ago

My "kids" are professional models, and you are right ReneBelloq we don't do that barking stuff. They are pitbulls whose mouths have enough strength to bend steel; little pieces of elastic can't stop any dogs from doing anything it would want to do with its mouth, let alone a pitbull.

[–]ReneBelloq 12 points13 points ago

God Damn! I can't believe you've just replied on a 6 months comment :)

Great work with your "kids" they are beautiful you should post some of their pictures to /r/pic I'm pretty sure they are /r/aww material too.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

So why exactly are these dogs wearing sunglasses?

I mean, it looks balla, but I dunno what the purpose is otherwise...

[–]Strikersquad 2 points3 points ago

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I'm sure that is probably the case. But still with the rubber band there, there is still a little bit of resistance against the mouth that could, at the very least, be uncomfortable for the dogs, if indeed they started barking. That's all I was trying to get across.

[–]orange_jooze 8 points9 points ago

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What a wonderful website.

[–]BuzzBadpants 4 points5 points ago

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I'm a little worried that the dogs can't open their mouth. Dogs need to be able to hang their tongue out to keep from overheating as panting is their only means of temperature regulation.

[–]tiikeri00 5 points6 points ago

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In this picture it looks they can still open their mouths to stick their tongues out

[–]knightofni451 73 points74 points ago

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He doesn't. They aren't even his dogs. They just show up and then spontaneously sprout sunglasses when one-over-r-squared is large enough, as predicted by Newton's Law of Universal Swagger.

[–]hogimusPrime 13 points14 points ago

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QED, bitches.

[–]somebitch 7 points8 points ago

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It looked like there were two rubberbands (or something similar) holding them on.

[–]aoeu00 5 points6 points ago

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Because his dogs "know" they are cool.

[–]adrenaline_devine 65 points66 points ago

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HERE is an article with lots of pictures on him and his dogs!

[–]raindiva1 12 points13 points ago

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Wow he sounds as badass as he looks. I like how he trolls the asshole commenters and then tells them to stop being mean to each other. I bet hes a great teacher too. Its funny how reddit loves him and the dbags in those comments are all accussing him of dog fighting or breeding. Im glad he isnt bothered by them.

[–]nyuncat 7 points8 points ago

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His dogs are named after Egyptian rulers. There is no cooler thing than this.

[–]Lizardbreath 7 points8 points ago

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The only person with context, why are you all the way down here????

[–]sixtysevensouth 208 points209 points ago

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  • Sunglasses at night - check.
  • Bleeding Cowboys font on shirt - check.
  • 2 watches for always letting motherfuckers know what time it is - check.
  • Gloves, cause fuck why not - check.
  • Pants tucked into fake Eddie Bauer boots - check.
  • 5 dogs, also with sunglasses at night - check.

Yep, it's pure. Pack it in people, this guy wins.

[–]tatonnement 14 points15 points ago

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Bro, those are LLBean boots. Come on!

[–]sixtysevensouth 5 points6 points ago

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I think they're more like LLLBean boots, amirite?

[–]ihateyouguys 4 points5 points ago

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And no mention of the shirt that says "something Caligula" on it??

[–]int3r4ct 7 points8 points ago

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Stop making me laugh like an idiot at work

[–]prometheus1981 250 points251 points ago

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[–]Captain_LargePoop 77 points78 points ago

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I-I guess I just have to deal with it.

[–]super_ultra 8 points9 points ago

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When I saw OP's photo, my first thought was: "deal with it" personified.

[–]2SmokesLetsGo 114 points115 points ago

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I think we finally identified who let the dogs out.

[–]BobLeBuilDerp 66 points67 points ago

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Case: CLOSED

[–]snawpes 74 points75 points ago

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It's a bit late but I took this picture in Atlanta. Is it the same guy?

[–]hogimusPrime 61 points62 points ago*

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Nope. That is actually a different active-wear wearing black man from Atlanta with an entourage of 6 sunglass-wearing bull dogs and one parrot, who enjoys wearing his sunglasses at night.

[–]KevinJD 6 points7 points ago

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Perfect reply.

Either some reddit users are really naive or lack common sense.

[–]schizoelephant 2 points3 points ago

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Guess I'm moving to Atlanta.

[–]orangeslash[S] 29 points30 points ago

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That's him. He must have left his parrot at home when I saw him.

[–]snawpes 14 points15 points ago

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I posted my image on my reddit bday recently and only got a few upvotes. I gotta make better titles. :(

[–]orangeslash[S] 15 points16 points ago

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So you did. I upvoted <3

[–]snawpes 5 points6 points ago

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Thanks haha. I appreciate the coincidence of the pictures more than the karma either way.

[–]Munry 71 points72 points ago

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They must be close friends with the squirtle squad

[–]webby_mc_webberson 85 points86 points ago

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Now each of the dogs needs to get a bunch of cats with sunglasses.

[–]down_vote_magnet 65 points66 points ago

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With tiny mice riding on the back of the cats, also wearing sunglasses.

[–]Solkre 48 points49 points ago

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Hey, does anyone know where I can get some flea sized sunglasses?

[–]lordsilly 23 points24 points ago

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I've got nano-technological microbe sunglasses if that helps us get this thread any closer to its logical conclusion.

[–]SlugsOnToast 5 points6 points ago

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Are they peril-sensitive?

[–]DarthDerp 5 points6 points ago

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So how many were traveling to St. Ives?

[–]hogimusPrime 2 points3 points ago

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Ok, now I have to ask, what kind of logical conclusion could a thread such as this possibly get to?

[–]uptwolait 17 points18 points ago

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[–]cynognathus 34 points35 points ago

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[–]Douchie0221 56 points57 points ago

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[–]hubertwojnar 2 points3 points ago

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THEN ILL UNBURY IT YYYYAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!

[–]dr_fox 38 points39 points ago

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He needs to go around saying "deal with it"

[–]ILikeToPinch 121 points122 points ago

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[–]LoudSar 12 points13 points ago

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You're my new favourite person

[–]Arternative1 11 points12 points ago

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"Yeah that's right I got 2 watches on. Deal with it."

[–]Wildweaselx 14 points15 points ago

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"Yeah, I'm also wearing gloves when it's clearly not even jacket weather. Deal with that too."

[–]allineedis42 10 points11 points ago

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"Yeah, you borrow my lucky deck of cards. Deal with it."

[–]provokedcarp 46 points47 points ago

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Fuck yeah atlanta!

[–]orangeslash[S] 22 points23 points ago

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Nailed it.

[–]axelator 27 points28 points ago

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Saw this guy in Piedmont Park a few months ago. No camera, and no one believed me.

[–][deleted] 77 points78 points ago

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Piedmont Park pic

I was there.

[–]Shitragecomics 29 points30 points ago

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Yo dawg...

[–]scilent_scee 22 points23 points ago

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I heard you like dealing with it...

[–]Today_Is_Jazz_Fest 13 points14 points ago

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..so we put sunglasses on your dawgs, so you can deal with dealing with it, dawg

[–]lebowskisweater 30 points31 points ago

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I'm cool. But I will NEVER be TWO WATCHES cool.

[–]ccb621 7 points8 points ago

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I don't know. I still like Professor Badass.

[–]CitizenReveur 7 points8 points ago

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I'm curious. What does that do to a dog's eyesight if they wear sunglasses?

[–]planterspeanuts 6 points7 points ago

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Clearly you've never seen Mr. Cool Ice

http://imgur.com/bgOo0

[–]KnowsWhatTheySay 12 points13 points ago

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Hey, I've seen this guy! Fly as hell.

[–]BetaState 4 points5 points ago

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Luke Cage?

[–]white_girl 5 points6 points ago

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I have seen this guy in Atlanta! When I saw him it was chilly out and the dogs had one hoodies also.

[–]correct_spelling 6 points7 points ago

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*on

[–]cityofcharlotte 2 points3 points ago

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Yeah I saw him a couple of years ago on New Years Eve there. They all had on Carolina Blue hoodies.

[–]sinembarg0 5 points6 points ago

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The dogs are blind and he's their guide human.

[–]socialistvegan 8 points9 points ago

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Ahahaha, I just saw this guy the other day while driving.

http://imgur.com/FVK0n

[–]Lizardbreath 3 points4 points ago

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Different dogs.

[–]TylerSten 7 points8 points ago

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It was him. He let the dogs out.

[–]elgubbo 3 points4 points ago

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every dog is just named "dog" to make it even cooler.

"jo dog, stay here" "dog, chill, sit"

[–]blooperama 3 points4 points ago

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man, those dogs really remind me of achewood.

[–]rockmongoose 3 points4 points ago

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YES THESE ARE DOGS.

[–]weepy_boy_santos 3 points4 points ago

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i don't know who my dad is but i'm pretty sure this is him

[–]That_Dog_Wont_Hunt 12 points13 points ago*

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All his dogs are named "Snoop Jr."

All of them.

[–]clcoyle 8 points9 points ago

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Yep. Maybe the coolest we'll ever see. Unless you stumble upon some guy walking 5 dragons with shades.

[–]Montzterr 5 points6 points ago

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Yo dawg, I heard you liked blind dawgs, so we gave blind dogs to your blind dawg

[–]acntech 2 points3 points ago

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Are those rubber bands??

[–]vinniedamac 2 points3 points ago*

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You don't truly appreciate this picture until you've tried to put random pieces of clothing on your pets.

[–]deavon 2 points3 points ago

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This guy is in Atlanta. I've seen him before at Centennial Olympic Park.

http://imgur.com/K8sDG

[–]Branch3s 2 points3 points ago*

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I SAW HIM if I find the pics I'll upload I saw him at the fireworks display on the fourth of July in Atlanta!!!

EDIT: Bad quality but here they are!!! www.i.imgur.com/38jbL.jpg

[–]A_Disgruntled_Texan 2 points3 points ago

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Deal with it.

[–]jackya 2 points3 points ago

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You might be cool, but you'll never be 5 dogs in sunglasses cool

[–]cerpintaxt2112 2 points3 points ago

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I see this guy in Piedmont park all the time, never have my camera though. Pretty awesome. He'll just stand there and all the dogs will look at you with their super cool sunglasses, like "Hey, what's happenin'?"

[–]steviestopwatch 2 points3 points ago

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Couldn't have found a better picture more worthy of my first upboat

[–]conitation 2 points3 points ago

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"What's up dog?" (I couldn't resist!) :D

[–]isaprettycoolguy 12 points13 points ago

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Thats me! Sup reddit

[–]orangeslash[S] 5 points6 points ago

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Really?

[–]biggerthancheeses 3 points4 points ago

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It's possible... he looks like he is a really cool guy.

[–]malilla 3 points4 points ago

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time stamp with your username?

[–]macaulee 5 points6 points ago

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[–]The_Adventurist 17 points18 points ago

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[–]legendairy 3 points4 points ago

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Ahh the Nigerian debt collectors. They have mfking baboons too.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]ComSat 6 points7 points ago

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I think this is the coolest guy.

[–]iancole85 16 points17 points ago

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Nice try, Mr. Cool Ice.

[–]endearingnoises 1 point2 points ago

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It's because he's wearing two watches.

[–]Dysalot 1 point2 points ago

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Maybe all his dogs are blind.

[–]CreeDorofl 1 point2 points ago

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If that doesn't get him laid, it's hopeless.

[–]Downvoted_Comment 1 point2 points ago

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Two watches! Such a baller

[–]poteaser 1 point2 points ago

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He is dripping with coolness.

[–]kittenfukker 1 point2 points ago

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He doesn't seem to know about doggles.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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His dogs have sunglasses. Are they blind? Can you get a smaller guide dog to guide your blind dog?

[–]SlugsOnToast 1 point2 points ago

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Is that Hootie?

[–]DogsWithGlasses 1 point2 points ago

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The happiness this picture gives me is why I felt the need to start DogsWithGlasses.

[–]rhyso90 1 point2 points ago

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Why did I immediately think Squirtle Squad?

[–]dudecore 1 point2 points ago

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I saw this guy outside of the Marriot in Atlanta during Dragoncon!

[–]AlphaRocker 1 point2 points ago

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Taking wearing sunglasses at night to a whole-nother-dog-gone-level.

[–]radapex 1 point2 points ago

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Holy crap... Terry Crews has a lot of dogs!

[–]Two_Oceans_Eleven 1 point2 points ago

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He saw I Am Legend

5 dogs > 1 dog, he's ready for December

[–]nekoyo 1 point2 points ago

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Denis Rodman minus the colored hair?

[–]vguts 1 point2 points ago

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Mace Ventura

[–]van_benson 1 point2 points ago

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Hopefully he's not too cool to pick up 5 dogs worth of dog shit off the sidewalk.

[–]AsSureAsStars 1 point2 points ago

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It's official. This guy has the coolest dogs I've ever seen.

FTFY

[–]jamgeo 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Cheshire057[!] 1 point2 points ago

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DMX?? (Dog Man X)

[–]LightningblitzR7 1 point2 points ago

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Is he wearing TWO watches?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Where is this?

[–]mrupyours13 1 point2 points ago

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Reservoir dogs ?

[–]sherax138 1 point2 points ago

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Darius Rucker?

[–]VJamz 1 point2 points ago

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I remember seeing him on that exact day! This was in Atlanta at the Hard Rock. I went to go see some cover bands play. That was a fun night.

[–]Yid 1 point2 points ago

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I wear my sunglasses at night, so I can, so I can, watch you weave then breath your story lines.

[–]GujuBandana 1 point2 points ago

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just because he's black? that's racist man

[–]negativeinfinity 1 point2 points ago

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He's so cool his cool rubbed off on all his dogs.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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pit bulls! <3

[–]zak_attaq 1 point2 points ago

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Its like the Squirtle Squad but cooler

[–]cupofworms 1 point2 points ago

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not cooler than Mr. Cool Ice, right bro?

[–]pepito420 1 point2 points ago

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This man has got the meaning of life figured out. Bravo.

[–]LoneRanger2 1 point2 points ago

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In my head, pre click: "nah, probably not THAT cool. Let's see."

Post click: "...alright thats pretty fucking cool."

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Hey guys, I know this picture is really funny to everyone, but I think it's important that we all understand the harmful effects of UV rays on the eyes. Oh wait it's nighttime. Carry on.

[–]bitterjack 1 point2 points ago

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D-D-D-D-D-DEAL WITH IT

[–]redditsoldout 1 point2 points ago

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He's no Woody Harrelson.

[–]djskein 1 point2 points ago

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My dog's futures are so bright, they all need shades...

[–]TheGreenViper 1 point2 points ago

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Seeing eye dawg.