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top 200 commentsshow all 323

[–]vitaminrad 163 points164 points ago

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Mine would be riddled with battle scars.

[–]chimpwithalimp 60 points61 points ago

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Turd world problems.

[–]onlyadequate 87 points88 points ago

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battle skids*

[–]MustStopMasturbating 17 points18 points ago

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[–]megacrabmaster 11 points12 points ago

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one of my friends in highschool would challenge me to this all the time, I think it was before the movie came out and we played it differently. Each person takes a shit and then whoever had the bigger shit won.

[–]buffalowing 23 points24 points ago

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ಠ_ಠ well, then

[–]zxo0oxz 11 points12 points ago

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Tagged as "battleshitplayer".

[–]ricketydoodah 2 points3 points ago

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lets be friends.

[–]megacrabmaster 1 point2 points ago

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Ok, sounds nice.

[–]JayRages 2 points3 points ago

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Only just noticed your username. Is it relevant to your link?

[–]youfuckingtwat 1 point2 points ago

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ಠ_ಠ

[–]steemi 2 points3 points ago

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I'd hit that

[–]colbertremix 2 points3 points ago

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Mine would be riddled with piss.

[–]TheRobberDotCom 5 points6 points ago

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piddled with riss

[–]the_woot_shoot[!] 98 points99 points ago

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Scumbag Piss Challenge - The hole is actually drawn on with a sharpie.

[–]CtrlShift7 2 points3 points ago

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Or covered with plastic wrap.

[–]big_muff 117 points118 points ago

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[–]trakam 50 points51 points ago

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noobtuber

[–]dat_ish 8 points9 points ago

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[–]zxo0oxz 7 points8 points ago

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Could come out messy, as with many hacks.

[–][deleted] 32 points33 points ago

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[–]EmptheBear 10 points11 points ago

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Altnernatively

Sees friends facebook logged in on computer

"LOLIMAFAG AND IVE BEEN HACKED"

[–]shitoutmybrains 5 points6 points ago

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Brilliant.

[–]Gr8namepicker 5 points6 points ago

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Cheat Cone

[–]AdrianoML 2 points3 points ago

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Your cheat code could... overflow

[–]Desigos 1 point2 points ago

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Damn aimbotters...

[–]aceoftrachs 61 points62 points ago

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It's a glory-bowl.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]option_i 15 points16 points ago

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All I see is the overflowing trash can.

[–]youfuckingtwat 4 points5 points ago

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crap ಠ_ಠ

[–]procrastinate4ever 2 points3 points ago

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Yep. Splatter would be inevitable...but that trash can shows it won't be out of place with the rest of the decor.

[–]modet 2 points3 points ago

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The only thing clean in that picture is the toilet brush.

[–]brbATF 25 points26 points ago

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the gap near the seat hinge is Nightmare Mode

[–]shitoutmybrains 6 points7 points ago

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I was thinking to myself, "I can't imagine what Nightmare Mode would be."
Thank you.

[–]ichargeatwindmills 4 points5 points ago

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I was thinking it just meant turning the lights off...

[–]Mooshi_03 4 points5 points ago

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There will spiders, many spiders.

[–]zhico 5 points6 points ago

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[–]SpamFilterHatesMe 1 point2 points ago

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Australian public toilet?

(there''s one more spider above)

[–]Richeh 1 point2 points ago

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Oh jesus, just when I think it's got as bad as it can, it fucking attacks.

Thanks for the neuroses, you prick.

[–]IFUCKINGLOVEMETH 4 points5 points ago

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[–]Twisted_Logic 23 points24 points ago

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Protip: Dangle cock in hole.

[–]Jman5 29 points30 points ago

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That's like sticking the gun up to the TV in Duck Hunt!

[–]douglasr007 3 points4 points ago

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I don't think a better analogy could be made.

Kudos to you.

[–]alienbrayn 8 points9 points ago

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Protip: layer cardboard, apply vasaline, homemade fleshlight.

[–]aikoaiko11 14 points15 points ago

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Protip: clean your bathroom

[–]thuff 8 points9 points ago

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That sounds....uncomfortable.

[–]DUMB_KUNT 1 point2 points ago

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O_o

[–]kgbexpert 1 point2 points ago

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Just got the weirdest visual of that.

[–]canigetahup 90 points91 points ago

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Try getting to the ministry of magic through that.

[–]SofaKingCanadian 8 points9 points ago

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I can't piss without hitting the seat. Fuck trying through that hole.

[–]alledn 0 points1 point ago

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[–]justsomeguyudontknow 29 points30 points ago

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[–]goddesspyxy 4 points5 points ago

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See, girls clean their bathrooms, so it's not that bad (except for the shot of the public bathroom - that's terrifyingly disgusting).

[–]laur7620 15 points16 points ago

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thats one disgusting bathroom

[–]morphtec 1 point2 points ago

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absolutely. that carpet must be soaked in piss.

[–]oskarw85 23 points24 points ago

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Includes:

  1. Friendly fire

  2. 10x splash damage modifier.

[–]zeup2000 27 points28 points ago

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Expert commode?

[–]Slaeke 1 point2 points ago

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came here expecting this. notbad.jpg

[–]joetromboni 9 points10 points ago

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hold my beer, watch this!

[–]lostmeatTroll 9 points10 points ago

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my attention fell on the obscene amount of toilet paper in the trashcan... someone needs a girlfriend, or to realize once you wipe your ass, it goes into the toilet as well.

[–]KyroDCK 26 points27 points ago

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CHALLENGE ACCEPTED

[–]LordCopenhagen 20 points21 points ago

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Comments below threshold are worth reading.

[–]Wulibo 5 points6 points ago*

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thanks for the tip!

edit: clarity

edit 2: I thought that just posting that I edited would be enough to make it obvious that Xybris' comment was actually called for... Sorry!

[–]aryst0krat 8 points9 points ago

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"CHEAT CODE: SITDOWN"

[–]house_of_amon 3 points4 points ago

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This is for pooping, right?

[–]Downhilldude 4 points5 points ago

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Christ, I can't even win on normal.

[–]xtralitespeed 11 points12 points ago

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What foul bachelor frogs you are.

[–]BiggyCharlie 6 points7 points ago

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FIRE IN THE HOLE!!!

[–]superawesomeid 4 points5 points ago

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Dude...0_0 what did you have?

[–]iRjeff 4 points5 points ago

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Bull, this is Hardcore mode.

[–]lildansonman 5 points6 points ago

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Hardcore mode is with the lights off.

[–]iRjeff 3 points4 points ago

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(Facepalm) Your right, hardcore mode is lights off and the hole moving randomly.

[–]moonblade89 4 points5 points ago

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so we complain about 9gag reposting content from here, yet we repost theirs here and get front page. Funny how the system works

[–]emjaysea 4 points5 points ago

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More like this...

[–]BLT5000 5 points6 points ago

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This is interesting. I've mastered Moderate Mode with just the seat down so maybe its time to step up my game.

[–]nocookies28 2 points3 points ago

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Dude empty your trash can.

[–]tacos388 6 points7 points ago

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Woah, that trash can's so full it'd be challenging to get anything in there!

[–]Truzzley 1 point2 points ago

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you are playing a dangerous game.

[–]iLuVtiffany 1 point2 points ago

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Hardcore mode would be tight plastic. If you miss, it goes all over the place... including you.

[–]spudcrazy 1 point2 points ago

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I think "Expert Commode" is more appropriate

[–]dodo_bird 1 point2 points ago

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r/frugal version of a cat toilet training kit.

[–]m0nty55 1 point2 points ago

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clean the freaking bathroom :|

[–]Decency 1 point2 points ago

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[–]EMT_guy 1 point2 points ago

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Absolutely no problem... except for the first few seconds.

[–]zackoch 1 point2 points ago

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does anybody remember the air dump video? Lol

[–]superawesomeid 1 point2 points ago

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how about 'clean up mode'

[–]sas4740 1 point2 points ago

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Once someone gets used to this, you should replace the cardboard with a matching one, except the hole is just colored with a sharpie

[–]Persica 1 point2 points ago

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they should put a pen-hole through it...GOD MODE!

[–]mariasaurr 1 point2 points ago

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I'm sorry but that overflowing garbage bin... shudder

[–]Cosmo5 1 point2 points ago

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Bachelor frog's bathroom?

[–]aerok 1 point2 points ago

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Hell Mode: try again except with a boner

[–]Mettkatrel 1 point2 points ago

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[–]MOMMERTS 1 point2 points ago

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Your bathroom is flithy.

[–]JibberGXP 1 point2 points ago

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That's God mode. Expert mode is sitting on that nasty fucking toilet bare-ass.

[–]pkl239 1 point2 points ago

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Difficulty level: Asian

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points ago

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Racist level: Reddit

[–]Not_Bad_Advice 1 point2 points ago

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I'm sorry if you think Reddit's bad, have you been outside lately?

[–]Facepalms4Everyone 0 points1 point ago

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Do it with No. 2, get an extra life.

[–]onus111 0 points1 point ago

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Guess you don't need toilet paper anymore...

[–]Bad_Badger 0 points1 point ago

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If you make this shot you are prepared to move on to the next level, in zero G. Being an astronaut

[–]Brandwin 0 points1 point ago

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Look ma, no hands!

[–]jaminscript 0 points1 point ago

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Need cheat codes! Specifically one that resets the level...

[–]interputed 0 points1 point ago

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Now we need Dante must Die mode!

[–]gigalowen 0 points1 point ago

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Is this for men or women...?

[–]wherestheanykey 1 point2 points ago

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Both, if you're sporty.

[–]gigalowen 0 points1 point ago

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Is this for men or women...?

[–]hakuice 0 points1 point ago

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Okay in the hours between 6AM and 12PM I'm gonna need two holes, preferably at the 2oclock and 8oclock locations.

[–]MrMingus 0 points1 point ago

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I thought this looked easy until I realized the seat was up...

[–]ThatThreeGuy 0 points1 point ago

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Don't mean to brag, but I'm sure I could full combo that.

[–]blooblop 0 points1 point ago

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Diarrhea mode.

[–]wherestheanykey 0 points1 point ago

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The only time this is even remotely possible is during the December challenge...

[–]hamsterpotpies 0 points1 point ago

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I could so do that.

Edit: Nope.

[–]FoxRooney 0 points1 point ago

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Sit down and let it dangle. Anyone?

[–]hazardRus 0 points1 point ago

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with lights off = nightmare mode

[–]WeekendWarrior25 0 points1 point ago

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Seems like you've failed a couple times. Look at the garbage can behind the toilet

[–]JabasMyBitch 0 points1 point ago

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dammit. why don't I think of this shit.

[–]TwoCat 0 points1 point ago

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Stencil + explosive diarrhea= interesting new form of street art.

[–]haiku_robot 1 point2 points ago

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Stencil + explosive 
diarrhea= interesting 
new form of street art.

[–]Mike_Wazowskis_Eye 0 points1 point ago

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Reminds me of the game at the fair where you shoot a squirt gun into a clowns mouth to pop the balloon. It sounds a bit homoerotic... But I swear it's not!

[–]dreamerize 0 points1 point ago

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Why does this look strangely similar to the training kit for showing your cat to shit/piss in the regular toilet and not the cat box?

[–]Insany92 0 points1 point ago

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So.. where does the pee pee go?

[–]cpqq 0 points1 point ago

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But for which number?

[–]littlewhitefriend 0 points1 point ago

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Second from the top on my front page, the top was "5 Years Ago Today". Thank you for the cheer up <3

[–]Magikarcher 0 points1 point ago

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It appears there is no hole, rather a circle drawn with black sharpie.

[–]Radank 0 points1 point ago

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The toilet that trained Luke Skywalker.

[–]mrupyours13 0 points1 point ago

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How would one pee with that setup ? Because everytime I poop my urine comes out automatically.

[–]talon010 0 points1 point ago

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and less splash back as a reward!

[–]haleted 0 points1 point ago

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I want to do this for the boys that I live with. They can't aim for shit into the NORMAL bowl.

[–]freudianslip_n_slide 0 points1 point ago

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someone needs a pee-bib

[–]TheSubjectChanger 0 points1 point ago

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So who else likes beer?!?

[–]brainburger 0 points1 point ago

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Nightmare mode. I'd say.

[–]i-break-sense 0 points1 point ago

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I just had a recent Philly experience of stomach virus. Not a problem. 200 times in one night. "Brown, flush it down." Nope. It stays all night long.

[–]n4ggs 0 points1 point ago

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Every one of us has real-time months spent on the shitter and yet, who among us can say they have truly mastered the art.

[–]nom_trees 0 points1 point ago

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Time to take out that trash.

Grody.

[–]Bloodywanker231 0 points1 point ago

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Impossible.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Fair enough ...

[–]stash0606 0 points1 point ago

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ok, well this was on my fb not too long ago.

[–]HairFarmer420 0 points1 point ago

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You call that expert?

[–]chinkoo 0 points1 point ago

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Expert mode: No help will be provided.....You are on your own....

[–]Popero44 0 points1 point ago

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I wonder what's hardcore.

[–]Wtfloki 1 point2 points ago

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I would consider being suspended 5 feet in the air from the toilet seat, with the cardboard stencil, while not being able to look down at all at the stencil hardcore.

[–]Madvillains 0 points1 point ago

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Poop. Funnel.

[–]lufberry 0 points1 point ago

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You really thought there's a hole? think again.

[–]zxo0oxz 0 points1 point ago

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Oh, shit.

[–]cactus_snack 0 points1 point ago

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The kids will love it when you potty train them too.

[–]ytsoc 0 points1 point ago

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imposible ,as the stream starts from the edge and as the flow increases the stream moves twards the middle where the hole is

[–]Typhoon- 0 points1 point ago

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It reminds me of Gintama Episode 113.

[–]donniesaidthis 0 points1 point ago

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This is how I die

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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there's a planking picture I hope is on this somewhere.

also foregen.org

[–]lisabadcat 0 points1 point ago

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Atari toilet.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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That will make even experts think once :D

[–]SHIVTRONIZE 0 points1 point ago

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Not possible, how would you keep the cardboard clean when you are about to finish pissing?

[–]fakepollution 0 points1 point ago

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I can tell that there is a women in the household by the amount of tissues in the trashcan

[–]Orcatype 0 points1 point ago

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It seems impossible to us, but kids in Korea can beat seven comps WHILE playing on expert mode. I heard they even show it on TV like a sport!

[–]DeSaad 0 points1 point ago

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Expert Mode requires you to use your brains and remove the cardboard before taking a leak or shit.

If you try to piss or shit through the hole in the cardboard, you have already failed.

[–]whycantweebefriends 0 points1 point ago

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Thats impossible! Even for a computer.

[–]lamdog220 0 points1 point ago

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[–]SoManySpiderWebs 0 points1 point ago

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First laugh I've had in a while. Brilliant.

[–]BuffaloBillsFan 0 points1 point ago

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Jesus, your bathroom is a mess.

[–]Qeldor 0 points1 point ago

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Is it for poop or for pee?

[–]HighBeamHater 0 points1 point ago

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Shit, I lost.

[–]kouji66 0 points1 point ago

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i have a hack for that

[–]epinephrine722 0 points1 point ago

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Seriously, empty that trashcan and pick up the other trash from the floor.

[–]cblname 0 points1 point ago

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What is with your floor? do you live in a cave? What are those rocks, in your bathroom?

[–]LSCanaan 0 points1 point ago

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When I first saw the picture, I thought it was for shitting and thought to myself: "Expert mode? That's goddamn impossible!"

[–]speednugget 0 points1 point ago

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Hardcore mode.

[–]trollzers 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

My roommates are all going to wake up to this.

[–]Ghost_Wolf 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Challenge Accepted. Engage precision pooping mode.

[–]itsjohn56 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Challenge accepted.

[–]brainflakes 0 points1 point ago

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Difficulty level: aimbot

[–]lebrian 0 points1 point ago

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Get rid of the crusted up spunk tissues. It glows in the dark, even without a UV light!

[–]unrelatedayinhistory 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

RCA Victor unveils 45 rpm record player-1949

[–]1000Bucks 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I prefer to just do a shit on the seat, and piss all over the dunny paper for the next cunt.

[–]juggaspartan 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

legendary

[–]Frigidor 0 points1 point ago

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For hardcore livers

[–]tehaleks 0 points1 point ago

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Omg omg omg change your trash

[–]Retrograde87 0 points1 point ago

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Great. Now we'll see pizza boxes turned into expert mode in every dorm and frat house!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Easy peasy

[–]garmachi 0 points1 point ago

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EMPTY YOUR FUCIKIN' TRASH!

[–]kajarago 0 points1 point ago

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"Oh dear, my balls are stuck in the cardboard again."

[–]drunk2407 0 points1 point ago

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Is this for pissing only coz I can't crap without pissing making this 1 hole impossible for crapping in most cases.

[–]slackX 0 points1 point ago

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wheres the dick hole?

[–]ctl8 0 points1 point ago

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For some added challenge, try when drunk!

[–]Commander_Spock 0 points1 point ago

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Expert Commode

FTFY

[–]griffith12 0 points1 point ago

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there are clearly not many experts that used that toilet before Expert Mode was unlocked.

[–]signspam 0 points1 point ago

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With the way my shits have been the last few days, this is not gonna happen....sorry for the TMI

[–]GLKMED 0 points1 point ago

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Then you have to glue quaters to the floor quite funny to watch

[–]hellokitty9 0 points1 point ago

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clean your toilet before you post a pic of it!

[–]eisselpud-puraaks 0 points1 point ago

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insanity wolf. expert mode on toilet. IS FEMALE. challenge accepted.

[–]ojolejano 0 points1 point ago

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I guess god mode would be peeing in the freedom of the woods

[–]missingsf 0 points1 point ago

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Challenge accepted.

[–]robblob 0 points1 point ago

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I lol'd pretty hard at this one.

[–]Keranth 0 points1 point ago

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TIL where gloryholes came from.

[–]ToAGasChamberGo 0 points1 point ago

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Wouldn't that be "Expert Camode"?

[–]FitCustomShirts 0 points1 point ago

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It is rather a bullshit mode.

[–]FrostByt 0 points1 point ago

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Here I thought my bathroom was nasty.

[–]Dirrwen 0 points1 point ago

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Looks like the hole is colored in, not cut out ಠ_ಠ

[–]BeerInsomniac69 0 points1 point ago

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That toilet resmebles my wife

[–]tdogg650 0 points1 point ago

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Insanity mode: in the dark, with a boner

[–]Cygnus_X1 0 points1 point ago

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Challenge Accepted.jpg