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135
136

If this is true, Jesus owes me about seven-hundred thousand dollars. (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by sweetdick

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[–]ProfessorMcLurk 22 points23 points ago

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If you don't sin, he died for nothing

[–]Apparatii 12 points13 points ago

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Why is there a human skull on his table?

[–]Aleitheo 16 points17 points ago

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Because he is a sinner and has sinning paraphernalia.

[–]gnomishmidgets 11 points12 points ago

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Or, he is a Shakespearean drug addict actor.

[–]AtomicSamuraiCyborg 8 points9 points ago

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Alas, poor Yorick, I am clean out of smack...

[–]butterflypoon 1 point2 points ago

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Bit redundant there, eh?

[–]thestraylightpun 0 points1 point ago

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Every time I see "paraphernalia" I think of the scene in The Wire where one cop asks "How the fuck do you spell paraphernalia?" while writing a report.

I don't know why, but that line slayed me.

[–]crazy4finalfantasy 5 points6 points ago

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why isn't there a human skull on YOUR table?

[–]KarmicCorpse 11 points12 points ago

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This guy is so bad he is even a member of The Dark Brotherhood. I bet he's shooting Skooma!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Yeah, what's the deal with the handprint, anyway? Any idea what that's about?

[–]necroden 2 points3 points ago

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We know.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Pretty sure this picture predates Skyrim by several decades :)

[–]necroden 1 point2 points ago

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didn't the dark brotherhood in oblivion have the same emblem?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Ah, probably. I remember seeing this picture as a kid though, and Daggerfall came out when I was in high school.

[–]SuperNoob1258 0 points1 point ago

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Skooma is taken oraly.

[–]icancount2one 1 point2 points ago

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Caius Cosades smoked skooma like a BAUS... but you wouldn't know about that.

In conclusion, relevant username.

[–]Doublethunk 9 points10 points ago

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You've blown seven hundred thousand dollars on heroin? Jesus Christ...

[–]Goppledanger 6 points7 points ago

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Gambling, guns, drugs, liquor, cigarettes, and nunchaks?

[–]Aleitheo 4 points5 points ago

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Jesus has a sweet tattoo, he should show it more.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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I just love how sin-packed this picture is. Pretty much the only thing it's missing is a prostitute and a box of condoms.

[–]gnomishmidgets 1 point2 points ago

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Sounds like a party

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Pyromaniac605 1 point2 points ago

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Umm... Male prostitutes...?

[–]throwaway0013 6 points7 points ago

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So he is drinking alcohol and about to shoot heroin? He isn't trying to get high.

He is committing suicide.

[–]WobbleBet 7 points8 points ago*

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With fat lines of cocaine prepared no less.

[–]mongerty 2 points3 points ago

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And a LIT candle. This guy is super irresponsible. What happens when he passes out and there is nobody there to make sure the candle doesn't burn the apartment down?

[–]WobbleBet 0 points1 point ago

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I am just cringing at the thought of him inhaling the scented candle fumes, standing up suddenly and having a headrush.... only to be strangled by the nunchaku draped so dangerously over the doorknob. Someone did not pay attention to school safety lessons is all I can say.

I bet he runs with scissors too.

[–]sweetdick[S] 5 points6 points ago

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Thats how I commit Tuesdays.

[–]ICrimsonI 4 points5 points ago

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if that's true, does jesus also help me jerk off?

[–]arCyn1c 1 point2 points ago

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Stephen Sawyer?

[–]E1Jefe 1 point2 points ago

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I noticed that on the skull table as well. turns out he's the artist. http://www.art4god.com/html/ It sort of looks like he uses his own likeness as jesus. interesting...

[–]arCyn1c 0 points1 point ago

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Quite interesting...

[–]ConorMaximus 1 point2 points ago

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Why does Jesus have a tatoo? Ain't that forbidden?

[–]EchoesFromAGhost 1 point2 points ago

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I love Jesus's face. Rape victim??? Ha awesome.

[–]Gunderfro 1 point2 points ago

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Hahaha, of course heaven gets dull for Jesus sometimes.

[–]think_free 1 point2 points ago

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Brought to you by the makers of Reefer Madness

[–]Prufrax 0 points1 point ago

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Damn you and your youtube links.

[–]AtomicSamuraiCyborg 0 points1 point ago

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Just to quibble, but is it me or does every object in the foreground like out of scale and just wrong? The gun barrel looks crooked, and the angle of the playing cards is also bizarre. It looks like the artist is good at people, and then decided his picture needed more sledgehammer imagery to reinforce the message that the heroin addict is A SINFUL MAN...

And didn't really work that hard on adding the rest of it.

[–]pacocat 0 points1 point ago

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Wouldn't Jezey be blissing the fuck out if he was taking horse right in the vein?

[–]kissfan7 0 points1 point ago

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The hell?

[–]Squidfish 0 points1 point ago

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Can we shop his face into a blissful smile?

"for fucks sake, Jesus, stop stealing my heroin!" "Im chasing the dragon, lol!"

[–]jordaniac89 0 points1 point ago

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So that's why I can't ever get high on meth.

[–]omniscientfly 0 points1 point ago

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It looks like that guy chipped and hammered a world map into his wall as well.

[–]ByeMan 0 points1 point ago

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Good eye

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