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top 200 commentsshow all 388

[–]Cuzimwhite 1352 points1353 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I wanna get so ripped that I distort time and space.

[–]assholebiker 494 points495 points ago

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I wanna get so distorted that I rip time and space.

[–]TheInternetToughDude 218 points219 points ago

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ITS RIPPING TIME!!!!!

[–]TwilightCurve 74 points75 points ago

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The rippin' and the tearin'.

[–]devilsadvocated 82 points83 points ago

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He ripped his thymen.

[–][deleted] 52 points53 points ago

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Tore his labias.

[–]homer2320776 18 points19 points ago

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Apparently no one remembers.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points ago

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It hasn't even been 72 hours

EDIT: Give or take a week. Time works a little differently here on Reddit.

[–]nebnodlew 8 points9 points ago

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[–]Lawsuitup 11 points12 points ago

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First he is ripping Time and next its all over the pirate bay and God is suing him for copyright infringement.

[–]MinnesotaBlizzard 5 points6 points ago

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Can I get an OH YEAH?!

[–]TheLastMan 4 points5 points ago

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Prepare your anus...

[–]dr_derp627 4 points5 points ago

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Come for the wild women and the ripping and the tearing

[–]Shakehandsman 2 points3 points ago

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GRAB YOUR MOMS FAVORITE MAGAZINE!

[–]ripman3 10 points11 points ago

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Am I too late?

[–]searingsky 8 points9 points ago

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you arrived before 1 and 2

[–]ChineseSweatPants 41 points42 points ago*

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I wanna space rip time so that I get distorted... and

[–]ScientificTableFlip 125 points126 points ago

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What the fuck does that even mean!?

(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

[–]Jurassic-Bark 87 points88 points ago

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┬──┬◡ノ(o.Ô ノ) chill out dude

[–]barbarianbob 24 points25 points ago

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Hey! You flip that table back over damnit! I have guests coming over in 20 minutes

ಠ_ಠ

[–]dancingrobot 16 points17 points ago

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Use your new novelty well, man. I expect good things.

[–]vjfalk 4 points5 points ago

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But you aren't doing your part!

[–]Themiffins 32 points33 points ago

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[–]NovaMouser 12 points13 points ago

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No! No time and space for you.

[–]Themiffins 95 points96 points ago

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[–]queerblackgirl 10 points11 points ago

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Love this gif!!

[–]Nkliph 7 points8 points ago

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I wanna get so 'and' that I distort rip space time.

[–]FaultyWires 4 points5 points ago

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Rip Spacetime sounds like the sequel to space jam starring rip hamilton.

[–]dyannnnna 1 point2 points ago

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OMG WHAT HAPPENED TO INSPECTOR SPACETIME?!

[–]stonespiral 1 point2 points ago

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I wanna get so spaced that I rip distorted time.

[–]thefirebuilds 1 point2 points ago

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I was going to get ripped but I spaced it out and had no time.

[–]omegaweapon 4 points5 points ago

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its gravitational lensing at its finest

[–]bkillau 3 points4 points ago

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4weeks bro. Click here.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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I'll get you ripped son. Just send me your credit card number, you'll be ripped in no time.

[–]MrAndroidFilms 1 point2 points ago

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quite possibly the greatest comment i've ever read on reddit

[–]fullyflared91 1 point2 points ago

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[–]alexunderwater 586 points587 points ago

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My only regret is.... that I have.... Boneitis.

[–]legendofj 66 points67 points ago*

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"It appears that your bones have merged into what we call, in the medical community, 'one large, hideous super-bone'."

[–]Thumbz8 1 point2 points ago

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Oh, yeah, that makes sense.

[–]WildeNietzsche 25 points26 points ago

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Dude, don't jump to conclusions, the mirror is probably warped, that's all.

[–]AeroZep 6 points7 points ago

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[–]SmallHexagon 283 points284 points ago

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To be fair, it must be hard to take pictures with a fun house mirror.

[–]cynthiadangus 90 points91 points ago

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It's actually probably a gas leak.

[–]marsneedstowels 69 points70 points ago

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"I don't remember the air in the kitchen being so wavy."

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]untogethered 22 points23 points ago

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The Simpsons.

[–]cynthiadangus 21 points22 points ago

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The Simpsons.

[–]xWeasel 19 points20 points ago

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The Simpsons.

[–]berryhill 20 points21 points ago

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The Simpsons.

[–]thederpmeister 16 points17 points ago

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The Simpsons.

[–]War_Junkie 18 points19 points ago

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The Simpsons.

[–]The_Exploding_Boy 18 points19 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The Simpsons.

[–]BreakfastClubSamwich 14 points15 points ago

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The Simpsons.

[–]Zacish 10 points11 points ago

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The Simpsons.

[–]mybrainisfullof 8 points9 points ago

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The Simpsons.

[–]peterodactyl 6 points7 points ago

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The Simpsons.

[–]candyapplerapture 15 points16 points ago

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I think it's actually the start of a dream sequence.

[–]Vanetia 6 points7 points ago

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Or possibly a flash back

[–]rub3s[!] 2 points3 points ago

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[–]studebaker103 1 point2 points ago

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"Actually probably."

[–]SlimMaculate 1 point2 points ago

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At first I was thinking "Did he run into a fun house half naked and take that picture?"

[–]sceptre_wintermute 104 points105 points ago

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I like the high heels by the bed

[–]andbruno 80 points81 points ago

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I think the only place that has a full-length mirror is his mom's room.

[–]TrustyGuy 58 points59 points ago

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I'm pretending they're his.

[–]spherexenon 33 points34 points ago

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I picture a "Silence of the Lambs" dance number in those shoes

[–]POTUS 31 points32 points ago

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I'd fuck me.

[–]A_german_in_amerika 35 points36 points ago

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I'd fuck me so hard.

[–]xaronax 12 points13 points ago

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Goooood bye Hoooorrrsessss.

[–]CristodelaPared 4 points5 points ago

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No need to pretend, they are.

[–]mattinthehat 1 point2 points ago

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I trust you.

[–]stopsucking 83 points84 points ago

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Angelica and Josh deserve each other.

[–]raythegay 74 points75 points ago

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Do not let them breed.

[–]Gortos 17 points18 points ago

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Sometimes I think big signs that say "Want a free blowjob? Get a vasectomy and you'll receive one!" would solve some of our problems.

[–]glenomenon 12 points13 points ago

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I think I have good reason to consider myself of above average intelligence and fairly good genetic stock, but I would still seriously consider that trade.

[–]Gortos 1 point2 points ago

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Well, at least you know what "vasectomy" means. Some, however...

[–]ConstipatedNinja 1 point2 points ago

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Depends. Blowjob right after a vasectomy must be a killer. Right before might be like local anesthesia.

[–]HerpingtonDerpDerp 16 points17 points ago

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[–]jcos444 24 points25 points ago

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and so begins idiocracy.

[–]flyheight 489 points490 points ago

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Sign him up for Cats Fact

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]20_percent_cooler 124 points125 points ago

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At this point, it seems to be bleeding internally.

[–]Shyr 25 points26 points ago

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And intentionally. Reddit loves self referencing shit.

[–]Just_Downvoted 10 points11 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]Haephestos 6 points7 points ago

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A much more accurate statement.

[–]IGottaFindBubba 19 points20 points ago

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Duct tape fixes everything.

[–]Patriclus 9 points10 points ago

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No time boy, go find Bubba!

[–]doctorducttape 7 points8 points ago

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I can help with that!

[–]LurkerTroll 5 points6 points ago

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As a former Petsmart employee, thank you.

[–]pigpill 1 point2 points ago

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Hey I am a former petsmart employee. Why are you thanking him, what did I miss?

[–]brotorious 1 point2 points ago

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[–]pigpill 1 point2 points ago

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Odd thing, I met the love of my life at petsmart, and our hair styles are very similar to the ones in the picture. (although hers is a dark brownish, not blue)

[–]irish711 0 points1 point ago

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hemorrhaging

[–]Magrippinho 6 points7 points ago

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Sign him up for You Suck at Photoshop.

[–]Thor4269 1 point2 points ago

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[–]sassy-andy 38 points39 points ago

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THE INCREDIBLE METLING MAN

[–]TheMediumPanda 12 points13 points ago

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Isn't he Gatling Gun's cousin?

[–]samarisi 6 points7 points ago

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Meltman! With the power to....melt!

[–]Moxxy 97 points98 points ago

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I'm impressed at how much detail went into the floor design of the house. Those construction workers cut out and laid down stragenly mishapen tiles that all seem to fit together.

[–]Sapphire--Blue 24 points25 points ago

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And the door opening as well! Amazing architecture, just incredible.

[–]Definitelyperhaps 15 points16 points ago

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Hotbid?

[–]Jesusisrippin 1 point2 points ago

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came here to say this. Upvote for you sir

[–]ElevenToFortyNine 25 points26 points ago

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i undid the liquify effects and restored the image to its normal state

http://imgur.com/ZbI6Z

[–]Arkitechts 112 points113 points ago

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if you crop a photo more does it count as a repost

[–]Willis626 24 points25 points ago

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He also unblurred the pictures, so I guess its more than a crop.

[–]nooodl 13 points14 points ago

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It counts as a epos.

[–]brokenhats 22 points23 points ago

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id really love it if he didnt shop this photo and just happen to own a fun house mirror

[–]coolestusername 17 points18 points ago

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Can someone use photoshop to UNphotoshop this??

[–]MLP_Awareness 57 points58 points ago

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[–]mlikweblue 5 points6 points ago

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Whoa

[–]Streakiest 2 points3 points ago

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If you photoshop something enough, it will eventually overflow to a negative photoshop.

Or is that something else?? i'm all mixed up here.

[–]topdawg312 1 point2 points ago

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I remixed a remix, it was back to normal

[–][deleted] 61 points62 points ago

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No the camera is just on drugs.

[–]pandatits[S] 57 points58 points ago

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oh.

[–]CuntyMcshitballs 15 points16 points ago

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Fear and loathing in my trunks.

[–]lunchboksman44 1 point2 points ago

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Am I the only one who read this in a really disappointed voice?

[–]FlowersofGood 50 points51 points ago

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Come on Reddit, we all know they are both just jerking around. It's like you all think everyone is so stupid on purpose.

[–]Shadax 13 points14 points ago

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Missing the satire is stupidity in itself.

Not saying this example is golden comedy or anything, it's just pretty obvious they aren't being serious.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]CptOblivion 12 points13 points ago

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I know you want to think this, but it's not true. There are actually people this dumb, and I've met a fair number of 'em.

[–]wrong_assumption 6 points7 points ago

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A person that dumb couldn't pirate a copy of Photoshop and learn where the Liquify filter is located. Think about it.

[–]CptOblivion 1 point2 points ago

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I choose to believe my real life experience over your internet speculation.

[–]Lucid_Nonsense 24 points25 points ago

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I guess he has such a big arm cuz he's such a wanker...

[–]_Synth_ 18 points19 points ago

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He must live in Salvador Dali's world.

[–]murmurtoad 8 points9 points ago

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Something was wrong with that picture so I tried to fix it up for him. http://imgur.com/0A5r6

[–]homerpalooza101 3 points4 points ago

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Does anyone have the skills to de-photoshop this? I wanna see what he really looks like.

[–]ithinkitsduke 4 points5 points ago

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He reminds me of a killer tire with psychic powers.

[–]Sweeede 9 points10 points ago

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This is such a bad Photoshop that he probably had to actually buy a copy to make it

[–]superflyer 5 points6 points ago

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He is so hot that he is making heat waves

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Fuck you, pandatits. I was taking my daily break on Reddit, clicked your link and project manager comes up behind me going, "You should probably close that out." I attempt to explain that it was Reddit. He goes, "I don't care what it is, you got a half naked guy up." Put up a NSFW tag next time.

[–]Flapjack_ 5 points6 points ago

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"Oh that? That's just the heat waves cuz I'm so hot baby"

[–]ZombieLiquid 7 points8 points ago

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His picture shouldve been labeled "I AMA 14 year old that learned photoshop today."

[–]dnshnd 26 points27 points ago

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I AMA 14 year old boy that installed photoshop today. FTFY

[–]ZombieLiquid 1 point2 points ago

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Thank you for that fix.

[–]Coolbreezy 1 point2 points ago

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More and more I think the movie "Idiocracy" is a prophecy... Has half of the youth of our society been dropped on its head?

[–]Coolbreezy 1 point2 points ago

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Fear and Loathing in suburbia...

[–]flyleaf2424 1 point2 points ago

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...still waiting for the reverse photoshop of this picture.

[–]Admiralzzyx 1 point2 points ago

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I would date a man who could warp time and space around him.

[–]sndzag1 1 point2 points ago

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He was just walking through one of those carnival house of mirrors. Relax, guys!

[–]ArkThompson 1 point2 points ago

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I think it is for his wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man halloween costume

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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did... did he give himself a boner with photoshop??

[–]LetKeepItSimple 1 point2 points ago

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Seems Legit.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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I can't tell if he's being serious, or trolling. It's so damned hard to tell with "bros."

[–]jobasha3000 7 points8 points ago

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[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]vearson26 4 points5 points ago

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Angelica is a whore and a moron and I would like her number please

[–]brash 2 points3 points ago

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Looks like he went a little nuts on the distortion to his crotch

[–]MarshallArtist 3 points4 points ago

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Looks likes it was shopped in wordpad. I'm surprised the girl who responded knew how to log into Facebook, must be muscle memory.

[–]Whoreadswhoreads 8 points9 points ago

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SERIOUSLY?! WHAT THE SHIT??!?

[–]liebkartoffel 11 points12 points ago

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OH NO. YOU HAVE FEWER MAGIC INTERNET POINTS THAN SOME OTHER PERSON EVEN THOUGH YOU BOTH REPOSTED THE SAME CONTENT. I THINK MORE BOLDING, CAPITALIZATION, AND SUPERFLUOUS PUNCTUATION IS IN ORDER!!!!?!';!?!

[–]lia_sang 8 points9 points ago

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Well, you didn't blur the last names.

[–]rushn006 4 points5 points ago

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Yes, seriously how dare someone repost a picture that you reposted from http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/owxhv/damn_hes_so_bad_at_photoshop/

That is an absolute outrage, how dare they! Damn lets get some bolding to add effect!

[–]phillysaxon 2 points3 points ago

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I particularly love that the pictures are getting more cropped on each repost.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]an_angry_amoeba 3 points4 points ago

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Request: Someone undo what he did, so we all can see the true kid before us.

[–]dmsheldon87 3 points4 points ago

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someone needs to get signed up for cat facts daily

[–]kilawl 3 points4 points ago

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Seems legit.

[–]whitmell 0 points1 point ago

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[–]pector 1 point2 points ago

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He looks like Stretch armstrong.

[–]lambast 1 point2 points ago

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[–]dactyif 1 point2 points ago

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I was really hoping to see a sweet shop.

[–]Mighell 1 point2 points ago

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Photoshop level Parkinson's

[–]Stormageddon222 1 point2 points ago

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I knew I saw this before. You were just the lucky one that reposted it 15 hours later and got more successful.

[–]IS_THIS_ONE_TAKEN 3 points4 points ago

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This has to have been a sociological experiment.

*Dear god, someone tell me it's a sociological experiment. *

[–]Bored_At_Night 1 point2 points ago

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Poe's Law is what you are looking for.

[–]Horseknuckle 1 point2 points ago

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& Those sheets are what gets him laid.

[–]MAKE_THIS_POLITICAL 1 point2 points ago

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Hotel luxury linens.

[–]WoodyTrombone 1 point2 points ago

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TWO NINETY-SIX?! Are you shittin' me man?

[–]rafuzo2 -1 points0 points ago

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ENHANCE

[–]Breakerx73 0 points1 point ago

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Is this a shop or a fun house mirror?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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That man appears to have suffered a rather serious snake bite.

[–]theincrediblerug 0 points1 point ago

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So that's what it's like to live in a funhouse.

[–]Koopslovestogame 0 points1 point ago

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[–]dan-o07 0 points1 point ago

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I wish i could workout so hard my legs can fit together like a puzzle piece like him

[–]Squirreldit 0 points1 point ago

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Totally looks like one of those fun house mirrors.

[–]SuperMerkinMan 0 points1 point ago

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Life in the vortex must be rough

[–]Inessia 0 points1 point ago

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shop? it's SHOOP

[–]ifatree 0 points1 point ago

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not sure what the picture has to do with anything, but now i have a better understanding of what that doctor p song is all about.

[–]Eighthsin 0 points1 point ago

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I don't even think the photoshop is the worse part. He's trying to do the muscly mirror pose when there's pink, high heels, and other various women's items in the background while attempting to pick up women. Three things you can get from this: 1) He is already seeing someone 2) He hasn't moved away from home or 3) He crossdresses. Also, the shaved body doesn't help him with #3.

[–]Xenc 0 points1 point ago

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I see no sweets ಠ_ಠ

[–]junkfood66 0 points1 point ago

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ahahahaha

no really, hahahaha

[–]ApatheticElephant 0 points1 point ago

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I honestly couldn't tell at first if this was shopped, or it's just one of those novelty wibbly-wobbly mirrors.

[–]angangry 0 points1 point ago

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Sweet reblog, man

[–]godofwar7018 0 points1 point ago

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Totally legit

[–]Commentits 0 points1 point ago

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Kinda reminds me of Taffy from Clayfighter

[–]Pafe 0 points1 point ago

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Why did he photoshop himself a boner? That's not sexy.

[–]LoriStrode 0 points1 point ago

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rofl. How stupid is this guy ? He doesn't notice or he doesn't care ?

[–]Isle_of_Tortuga 0 points1 point ago

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Upvote for the user name. Panda tits>shark tits

[–]NotANoveltyUser 0 points1 point ago

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Everyone is freaking out about the distorted mirror, but did nobody notice he is in a girl's room? Heels, purses, all that?

[–]mrpopenfresh 0 points1 point ago

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It seems to be working, so why bust his balls over it?

[–]TheLighterDark 0 points1 point ago

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I was totally going to downvote until I saw his penis. Now I can't stop laughing.

[–]Rage4123 0 points1 point ago

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Wait wait wait. Brown Milkyways?

[–]RespondsWithBadJokes 0 points1 point ago

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I like to imagine him as having a disorder which makes the world around him bend and change, leaving outsiders seeing him as an awkward mass of curves and curls.

I like to imagine him trying so desperately hard to find a soul mate in life, that he is willing to post half naked pictures of himself to show off he isn't afraid of who he really is.

I like to imagine that, by the end of the day, the sarcastic comments from "friends" and the rude comments by strangers leave him self conscious and alone.

I like to imagine that he will find true love some day.

[–]Indigoma[!] 0 points1 point ago

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lol guise dis iz liek a sooo badd fotoshop amirite lmaoo

[–]PhillyG 0 points1 point ago

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does he have polio?

[–]nissanator 0 points1 point ago

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crooked penis!

[–]Girl_in_Pearls 0 points1 point ago

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It reminds me of the optical illusion on here that makes the walls bulge..

[–]Roomy 0 points1 point ago

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Was the guy joking around and trying to see if girls noticed, or was he actually brainless and the future winner of a Darwin Award? I can't believe anyone could be that stupid, lol. Oh wait, that's right. Think about how stupid the average person is, then remember that 50% of all people are even more stupid than him.

[–]SwiftSpear 0 points1 point ago

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I love the massive distortion in the crotch

[–]Whtieout 0 points1 point ago

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fuck yeah

[–]dacookeymonsta 0 points1 point ago

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I don't get it, all I see is just some ripped dude.