Police Notes

starlinguk · 8 months

Buy new leads.

Tebasaki · 8 months

This is like the time someone broke into my house, stole all my furniture and replaced it with exactly the same thing. (Steven Wright)

iPatjo · 8 months

Why is there censored text?

77108 · 8 months

What is this? Insurance Fraud for Dummies?

Maharog · 8 months

that son of a bitch did the same thing to my computer a while back.

gagnatron5000 · 8 months

Is this in Akron? This sounds like something an akronite would do. Seriously, I love my neighbors. They are some of the most idiotic people I know.

therealjag · 8 months

A [blank] woman reported...The missing word was "stupid" people. "stupid".

pukesickle · 8 months

Leads? Yeah, we have four new detectives working on the case!

boyerman · 8 months

I used to work at a bank and I would routinely have customers come in after a declined transaction claiming someone must have stolen their card right from their wallet and replaced it with an absolutely identical one that didn't work. I wish I was kidding.

frenchlimon · 8 months

I suspect Acer is the thief.

the_great_dane · 8 months

It's already in the paper. Why censor it?

RichardPeterJohnson · 8 months

Relevant

pablorobo · 8 months

MOM?

manbrasucks · 8 months

To be honest, that really would be the perfect crime if you needed new parts and knew someone had the exact same model.

DamienCIsDead · 8 months

This should be crossposted to /r/TalesFromTechSupport, they'd get a kick out of it.

afcagroo · 8 months

Our local "newspaper" (San Jose Mercury News) has a police log from communities in the area, and there are some occasional doozies. Many are from Atherton, a city which apparently has a fairly old, conservative, and nutty population.

My favorite was when a woman called the police to complain that some people had come to her front door, and she was pretty sure they were Democrats.

wesman212 · 8 months

Ma'am, did you try unplugging it and then plugging it in again?

epicGOPfail · 8 months

it's simple: the fuckers stole the leads!

why, i bet the hardware is the same.

CASE CLOSED

TheCannon · 8 months

This is nothing.

One time somebody broke into my house and replaced everything I owned with an EXACT replica.

I asked my roommate if he knew what the hell was going on, and he said "Do I know you?"

neelshiv · 8 months

Is it possible that the author of this blurb was implying the exact same joke about "leads" and computer hardware that everybody here thinks they are brilliantly coming up with on the spot? It seems like that is a pretty likely scenario.

StockmanBaxter · 8 months

Sad thing is. I have a customer who is exactly like this. She is accusing people of hacking her computer and changing text in her word document she's been working on.

lia_sang · 8 months

The docket in the local paper in the small town I grew up in was equally wonderful. I swear, the writer always had his thesaurus next to him; he always carefully constructed sentences like "a purse was pilfered" or "a scammer swindled..."

Azn_Bwin · 8 months

Have you try turning it on and off

robeph · 8 months

For those who are annoyed by the censored text, here's the actual blotter report from the police department concerned. http://www.depewpba.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=49:computer-hardware-switch&catid=49:blotter&Itemid=54

not_a_temp_account · 8 months

Why do people insist on blanking out names? This looks like a newspaper article... if they can print it in the newspaper, why are you concerned about protecting her identity?

solidstripes · 8 months

That's either the greatest prank ever, or that lady has really gotten desperate about playing her Farmville.

not_a_wolf · 8 months

I get the joke but I actually know people who have done this.

Our school got all brand new computers (probably a few hundred) that were put to complete waste due to the ridiculous amount of firewalls and monitoring software.

They each had two 1GB sticks of ram (a crap load of RAM back then) but were hardly using any of it since you were basically only allowed access the school's website.

My friends would buy broken sticks of the same type of RAM, swap it out, and keep/sell the good stick. They were expecting our school's system admin to replace the broken stick then they would repeat the process. They eventually found out our school's system admin didn't even monitor the hardware on our school's computers so they just started directly taking one stick from each computer without swapping in a broken one. They probably made like $500 from this.

loial37 · 8 months

No way! My grandmother once reported her BRIGHT PURPLE Chevy Cavalier as stolen and replaced with an exact, non-working, model. The dastardly thieves even went as far as to move all the stuffed animals she had in the rear window.

PBXbox · 8 months

Coming up next on Gangland...The vintage 3d shooters

afcagroo · 8 months

Those fuckers hit my place, too!

rader1977 · 8 months

Small world. I'm from Tallmadge! Love reddit. edit: this was supposed to go under the Akron/Crackron thread. Damn phone.

RunCode3 · 8 months

Weird calls like this are not that uncommon. It's scary how many out-to-lunch people there are.

cspeed · 8 months

I once broke into a construction site, picked a lock chaining a scissor lift and chained up a bunch of other tools, pipes, and cinder blocks then relocked it. Try explaining that Monday morning.

MirrorDarkly · 8 months

Reminds me of some of the tech support calls I take.. "This is not my ipad, mine was working yesterday!"

OccupyRiverdale · 8 months

My mom has actually accused me of doing this before after I printed something on her computer and she broke it a month later.

onowahoo · 8 months

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/e015f/

VOICE_OF_REASONING · 8 months

Somebody did the same thing to me recently. I had a perfectly good dishwasher last week but on Friday I came home and someone switched it with a broken one!!

Applebeignet · 8 months

Have you tried turning it off, then on again?

Barnett8 · 8 months

One of my friends roommate sent a police report saying that somebody broke into his room, stole one of his shirts, then broke his headphones...

grimatongueworm · 8 months

Clearly, they don't have them working in shifts.

Ayrayray · 8 months

Seems legit

Knight5 · 8 months

ಠ_ಠ

mrlint · 8 months

Why would you obscure information from a newspaper?

DirtBurglar · 8 months

Seems legit.

cypher340 · 8 months

She should download more RAM.

Kratosius · 8 months

I did it.... probrem?

Hydris · 8 months

I actually used to do this with games from the video store.

Ericholterman · 8 months

The whole thing reminded me of the image macro with the Asian guy saying: "Oh hai, I updated ur RAM!"

Was disappointed when I didn't see a post with it :(

bigcappy · 8 months

I'm definitely going to use this explanation today when talking to one of my end users.

iplaw · 8 months

On a similar note, I once bought a video card from Best Buy that had been switched with a used, older generation video card. I had a hell of a time explaining the situation to the employees. They all assumed I was the scammer, not the victim.

NewEgg, from then on.

SirDigbyChicknCeasar · 8 months

You know, this would be a really good idea actually. Imagine you work somewhere that is just full of junk hardware that's destined for recycling or whatever happens to that stuff. It's worthless but if you can find identical working hardware to switch it with you could possible make a decent amount of money. Or it would be way too much hassle for way too little pay off. But come on, money aside, it would be a little fun to make people feel and look crazy to the police. If you're into that sorta thing.

KaprateKid · 8 months

Crime...boy I don't know...

shadowkelp · 8 months

Red Herring....

anal_rapist_ · 8 months

I had a classmate back in the day who used to steal RAM from school computers when the Computer Science teacher was away. It was 1997 or something. I imagine him sneaking into that woman's home and switching her hardware.

capnmorgansobased · 8 months

I live in Dallas and saw this in the Preston Hollow People! The woman actually lives a few blocks away from me.

plastic_cookware · 8 months

Someone broke into my reddit and replaced all of the posts with identical posts.

Vondruke · 8 months

Seriously, which newspapers post these articles? Why don't I ever stumble across one of these?

spindoc · 8 months

Sounds like schizophrenia. It's common for a sufferer to believe someone's out to get them and they'll come up with ridiculous excuses to justify their belief (such as someone swapping out their hardware, moving their furniture while they're out, etc.)

barkyy · 8 months

Philosophical Computer Zombie

jdcooktx · 8 months

that shit happens to me all the time. especially with light bulbs.

Owain1 · 8 months

mum?

AnotherEcho · 8 months

After my computer broke and I sent it to a local guy to get it fixed, it came back with this saved in my "Pictures" folder. Should I be insulted?

dacookeymonsta · 8 months

You don't say? We need to get the hardly boys on this, I think they have a clue.

[deleted] · 8 months

That actually would work, replace your old hardware by putting it in some tech-uninformed woman's computer and she'll never know what happened.

drockers · 8 months

She just needs to download more RAM.

kempo666 · 8 months

Pfft... "leads"...

Levy_Wilson · 8 months

Rip old broken hard drives out of old computers, break into someone's house, rip out their working hard drives and replace them with the broken ones.

So instead of thinking they were robbed, they think their computers just broke on its own.

I think this woman is onto something.

redditjesus · 8 months

It's because IE

Chemical_Mike · 8 months

My girlfriend lived with a roommate who had a working Nintendo that she never used. My Nintendo was broken. I switched them when my girlfriend moved in with me.

Now I can play Super Mario 3. Totally worth it.

TheMediumPanda · 8 months

Ah yes, the original switcharoo.

RonaldFuckingPaul · 8 months

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/e015f/police_notes/

VuVuZeLa42000 · 8 months

women lol m i right? smh

kvegas291 · 8 months

Don't you jut love women and technology

funny

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