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top 200 commentsshow all 381

[–]IHv2RtrnSumVdeotapes 9 points10 points ago

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Doctor: So, as you can see (pointing to a chart), you are just over the line of mental retardation.

Peter: Don't you mean, just under the line?

Doctor: The day I'm corrected by a reta!!….I'm sorry. Just please trust the analysis.

[–]arebe2 27 points28 points ago

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The day I'm corrected by a RE-

[–]Mypenisblack 3 points4 points ago

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-dditor.

[–]arebe2 2 points3 points ago

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Well played.

[–]yooder 48 points49 points ago

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That looks very similar to the scale used in Forrest Gump

[–]phillycheese 74 points75 points ago

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Yes that's the joke.

[–]LordShaggy 11 points12 points ago

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YOU SUCK MCBAIN

[–]censored_username 0 points1 point ago

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[–]Atario 2 points3 points ago

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I never made that connection, despite having seen both. So I am grateful he made the observation.

[–]Slexx 2 points3 points ago

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Please make a novelty account called ThatsTheJoke

[–]Fa1nT 3 points4 points ago

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50 probably already exist

[–]noyourthejoke -1 points0 points ago

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Ya no kiddin'

[–]RaindropBebop 14 points15 points ago

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Image for reference?

[–]shaftdestroyer 11 points12 points ago

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[–]RaindropBebop 2 points3 points ago

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Ha, very nice, Family Guy.

Thank you for posting the image.

[–]dactyif 61 points62 points ago

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Occasionally? SIR, I beg to differ.

[–]mkosta 27 points28 points ago

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I find it hilarious that any praise of Family Guy on reddit is prefaced with something along the lines of "They're usually not funny but..."

[–]Atario 5 points6 points ago

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South Park cultists don't take kindly to not prefacing praise of Family Guy 'round these parts!

[–]thatnerdykid 1 point2 points ago

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nor anywhere

[–]Arrogant-Basterd 6 points7 points ago

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I mostly dislike it because it's just a string of completely interchangeable cut-away jokes.

OH WAIT POO JOKES HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA.

[–]saadakhtar 7 points8 points ago

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Conway Twitty.

[–]kragmoor 0 points1 point ago

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GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE

[–]izmeister 8 points9 points ago

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I once told a guy I didn't like family guy for that reason. He told me to show was too "witty" and "smart" for me to "get"... Let's just say there was no second date

[–]Ol_Lefteye 4 points5 points ago

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You chose wisely.

[–]dactyif -1 points0 points ago

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The only witty thing... never mind, its fucking hilarious, I don't think intelligence plays a part.

[–]Arrogant-Basterd 0 points1 point ago

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I don't think Intelligence directly plays a part but sense of humour does.

With Family Guy, I can see every joke coming and when the jokes do arrive they dwell on them too long for my liking.

and finally, although not Family Guys fault, I don't like American Dad that much and I can't believe the Cleveland Show is considered comedy, and I pretty much pool those three together.

[–]EsteemedGentleman 1 point2 points ago

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That's why I like Futurama. There's always something fresh, but then there's the occasional WOOP WOOP WOOP.

[–]kragmoor 0 points1 point ago

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i enjoy the spin offs quite a bit more so than family guy

[–]kragmoor 0 points1 point ago

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im guessing he also enjoys nascar and smackdown

[–]kragmoor 2 points3 points ago

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just like adam sandler movies! :D

[–]Right_on_BRO 3 points4 points ago

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Well the early seasons were golden, then writers... fuck tired of always explaining. They used to be funny, blah blah blah blah, bob laub's law law blog, manatees. Now the show is awful.

[–]Jim_Gaffigans_bacon -3 points-2 points ago

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Sir, I have to second that query.. How dare you say 'occasionally' when referring to the modern pinnacle of animated comedy that is... the bomb giggidy.

[–]Noobasdfjkl[S] 11 points12 points ago

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Red 5 standing by.

[–]jav032 10 points11 points ago

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Red October standing by.

[–]theultimatejames 4 points5 points ago

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Simply Red standing by.

[–]kragmoor 2 points3 points ago

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red rover standing by

[–]pyr0phelia 4 points5 points ago

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Red button standing by.

[–]HolaPinchePuto 6 points7 points ago

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Red rocket standing by.

[–]Skab 3 points4 points ago

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Red Square standing by.

[–]ExistentialEnso 3 points4 points ago

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I can take or leave most episodes of Family Guy, but holy hell are the Star Wars parodies brilliant.

[–]Noobasdfjkl[S] 0 points1 point ago

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I thought something something dark side was best.

[–]dactyif 2 points3 points ago

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I'd sleep with quagmire, no homo of course.

[–]Vaccy 0 points1 point ago

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My only experience was being forced to watch a "movie" of it about them time travelling or something and it wasn't funny at all. Is the regular series better?

[–]NannigarCire 0 points1 point ago

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It's a great show that was given a bad rap after seth Macfarlene realized his original concept was too smart (even though it wasn't that smart) for the average Fox viewer. So he dumbed it down, way down, completely dismembered the storylines and kept Family Guy's main aesthetic (the cut-aways) while copying the simpsons lack of plot and character pigeonholing. Now that he essentially owns sunday night on Fox though, he's decided to bring back plot and start unpigeonholing the characters, as well as bring up the humor level a bit. He still has to fit in those shitty low-brow jokes but they're a necessity to reach the "simpler" audience.

Simply put, Family Guy is pretty great, especially the new ones.

[–]kragmoor 0 points1 point ago

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and that's why i want him to abandon fox

[–]WhyMe69 -1 points0 points ago

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I must thrice this opinion!

[–]cnnmntstcrnch -1 points0 points ago

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As do I.

[–]IvyMike 8 points9 points ago

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There's an online generator.

P.S. Total burn.

[–]BigStare 0 points1 point ago

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Thank you, how can something so stupid be so awesome?

[–]Isu_the_Mule 82 points83 points ago

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This isn't a gem, it's just easy jab with no actual content. You could have put literally any group of people on the bottom and it would have made sense.

[–]DrSmoke 8 points9 points ago

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Fuck you, it was awesome.

[–]therager 0 points1 point ago

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"Don't agree? Well fuck you!" - /r/atheism

[–]soochosaurus 37 points38 points ago

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but this is reddit, home to the largest concentration of atheists in all the world wide web.

[–]Richard_Louis 1 point2 points ago

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I don't think you need to be an Atheist to understand that people who ignore facts to say " well, this book says earth IS 6,000 years old, so it must be true, and you must be wrong " is...well.... bellow average intelligence.

[–]inikul 0 points1 point ago

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Actually, that is probably google or facebook.

We are the largest one dedicated to it though.

[–]aDildoAteMyBaby 4 points5 points ago

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I have a moment of shame every time I laugh at a shitty joke because I feel like I'm making the market just a little bit bigger for shitty jokes.

Feelin good this time, though.

[–]Lowbacca1977 1 point2 points ago

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I seem to recall, its more that the screen time on this is extremely small, so that this wasn't put front and center. Which, I give it bit of credit for as a background joke, in that sense, but agreed on content.

[–]Atario 1 point2 points ago

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Funny is funny.

[–]I_Conquer 1 point2 points ago

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[–]unconventionalspork 0 points1 point ago

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Hm.

[–]BlazeOrangeDeer -4 points-3 points ago

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Seriously, this subreddit is about as friendly and fair to theists as my mom is about "Liberals". It kinda sucks, is what I'm saying. Or at least this is true of the posts that reach front page, which is why the subreddit has such a bad image. There may be real discussion going on somewhere (and I would like to take part in it), but most of what I see consists of "We are going to make cheap jokes about a group which we are not members of LOL don't they suck?"

[–]Slexx 25 points26 points ago

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As I've said other places in this thread, this subreddit isn't about being friendly or unfriendly to theists. Yes, we make fun of theists. So? Have you ever heard Christians talk about atheists? We're vilified and reviled, to a horrifying extent. Christians are the ones failing to shoulder the burden of proof placed on them by making extraordinary assertions, believing things which are not reasonable to believe, and acting on these beliefs in a way that often harms others. Some mockery is justified. It's not the most productive thing in the world, but having a place where you can go to share your amazement at the absurdity exhibited by religious people is a nice thing.

[–]BlazeOrangeDeer 3 points4 points ago

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Yeah, but simply calling your opponents less than retarded isn't really mockery, it's a fill-in-the-blank joke like Isu said. Ah well, I guess I kinda sound like the Fun Police.

[–]Slexx 5 points6 points ago

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You're correct, this post isn't /r/atheism at its most sophisticated. However, it's funny, it's on-topic, and as such it's not deserving of this level of scorn.

[–]pyr0phelia 1 point2 points ago

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It's just not worth our time and effort to make witty jokes about them. They do that for us

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points ago

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So? Have you ever heard Christians talk about atheists?

That kind of attitude will keep you in the exact same place your whole life.

[–]Slexx -1 points0 points ago

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Yes, I have heard Christians talk about atheists. This "kind of attitude" isn't some sort of juvenile way for us to feel better about ourselves, at least for most of us. What it is is a place and a method for us to blow off steam and vent the anger we feel at stupid things caused by theism.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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My point is the cause is within us.. to be happy, to be angry... we control that, or at least we CAN control that, we just have to learn how to. The steam doesn't have to build up in the first place is what I'm saying.. discussion is one thing, talking shit is another.

[–]phlamez92 1 point2 points ago

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Last I checked, the image from FG is a pretty accurate description of creationists so it doesn't really count as talking shit.

[–]ikancast 0 points1 point ago

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I've actually never heard a Christian mention an atheist before. You aren't as important as you think.

[–]Slexx 0 points1 point ago

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I didn't say I was important. And your experiences don't invalidate mine. They do talk about atheists. Sometimes to pray for their souls, sometimes gossip. It's also irrelevant. We can talk about whoever we want.

[–]JumpingLove 0 points1 point ago

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The discussions you're looking for are at /r/DebateReligion. Don't tell the circle jerk though.

[–]psychedelegate 2 points3 points ago

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Who else thought it was Hank Hill in the thumbnail?

[–]schoolairplane 3 points4 points ago

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Dangit bobby

[–]the_trombone_man 0 points1 point ago

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I did before I opened it. Now I can't really see as much of a similarity.

[–]Thedeadmilkman 4 points5 points ago

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Was this the episode where the doctor found a crayons in his brain?

[–]IDe- 8 points9 points ago

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Wasn't that in the Simpsons?

[–]Thedeadmilkman 0 points1 point ago

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yes. it was a joke.

[–]nig3rian_prince 3 points4 points ago

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are you sure you don't have a crayons in your brain?

[–]TheGoldenMonkey 15 points16 points ago

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The best part about it is creationists will watch it and go "Haha Family Guy is so funny!" and they'll never know it's a completely serious joke.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Do you really believe that? Creationist =/= completely oblivious to Seth Macfarlane's "nuanced" humor, if you can even call it humor. It's just lazy writing, is all.

[–]johnmedgla 2 points3 points ago

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Creationist =/= completely oblivious to Seth Macfarlane's "nuanced" humor

Is indeed a fair representation of what I believe regarding those people.

[–]survivoreater 1 point2 points ago

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Yes, quite. Family guy is so original really, it's just great to have a breath of fresh air like this in r/atheism. *sarcasm

[–]JSLEnterprises 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Croonflys 1 point2 points ago

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it's the cigarette in the doctors hand that makes the situation funny to me.. family guy has lots of slapstick and crude jokes like the chart, but occasionally a small detail adds that next level of social commentary

[–]kaj519 1 point2 points ago

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They forgot Eli Manning

[–]aotsfan007 1 point2 points ago

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Seth macfarlane is an atheist

[–]science_diction 1 point2 points ago

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If you're a family guy fan, never watch the "Cartoon Wars" episodes of South Park. You'll never be able to watch the show again.

[–]Falb0ner 1 point2 points ago

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Why does the thumbnail look like Hank Hill

[–]braun616 5 points6 points ago

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every once in a while Family Gay can make me smile

[–]Jim_Gaffigans_bacon 3 points4 points ago

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your mom makes me smile more than every once in a while.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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Me too! She does great peanut butter cookies.

[–]Balrizangor 2 points3 points ago

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AN UPVOTE FOR AN ALL TO YOU FUN

[–]braun616 1 point2 points ago

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hope ya liked the wicked yeast infection

[–]Jim_Gaffigans_bacon 0 points1 point ago

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when life gives you yeast, make bread!

[–]braun616 0 points1 point ago

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vagina bread!

[–]oposssom 1 point2 points ago

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this is not one of those times

[–]jackass17 1 point2 points ago

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What do you mean, OCCASIONALLY?

[–]thesorrow312 1 point2 points ago

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It has sucked ever since the star wars set of episodes that were the beginning of a season.

[–]Jim_Gaffigans_bacon -3 points-2 points ago

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no, no it has not.

[–]thesorrow312 -2 points-1 points ago

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IMO, and quite a few others.

[–]AlexZander 0 points1 point ago

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Quality television.

[–]Zeydon 1 point2 points ago

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He looks like Hank Hill in the thumbnail

[–]Contero 1 point2 points ago

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This stupid circlejerky shit makes this sub look bad. Haha we're so smart guys! Also anyone who disagrees with us is stupid!

[–]RaindropBebop 8 points9 points ago

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I'm assuming that the joke in OP's picture is regarding young earth creationists. If you are a young earth creationist, who believes that the earth was created 4,000 - 10,000 years ago, you are stupid. It takes 5 seconds to google "age of the earth" and perform sufficient research to realize that the earth is fucking old -- scientists aren't fucking with you.

Scientists have radiometrically aged dated meteorite material and have determined the earth to be 4.54 billion years old, and have cross referenced that finding with terrestrial sediment as well as sediment from the moon.

[–]sennais1 5 points6 points ago

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Not to mention this pic appears once a fortnight.

[–]ExistentialEnso 1 point2 points ago

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I like it when people use the word "fortnight" -- I wind up reading their post in a British accent.

[–]sennais1 0 points1 point ago

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Haha hate to ruin it for you but I am Australian. Might wind up sounding a bit different I imagine...

[–]ReznailsNIN 1 point2 points ago

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Occasionally?

[–]charbroiledmonk 0 points1 point ago

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NOOO! THIS IS SO OVER! IT DIED! Boring! You're boring me!!!

[–]kinguphill 0 points1 point ago

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A gem is an object that looks badass but doesn't do anything helpful. Is that the metaphor you were going for by calling this picture a gem?

[–]CurlyGirl11 0 points1 point ago

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I wonder if this is a Forrest Gump reference…?

[–]Trenchleaf 0 points1 point ago

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In the show they say "as you can see here you are just above the retarded line" Hur hur hur

[–]berryhill 0 points1 point ago

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My name is Peter, this made me feel bad

[–]Z0mbieChef 0 points1 point ago

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Sent this link to my mother and got a response of "whatever you want to believe _____" It's a sad sad day.

[–]eezzzz 0 points1 point ago

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I like things I agree with.

[–]calszones 0 points1 point ago

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You know I try not to get mad at people who make fun of creationists but seriously calling us dumber than people who were born with a mental defect! that is so wrong I know family guy is just expressing their view and poking fun at how their is this big debate between Athiests and Creationists but for you to go and say that it is a GEM! That just irks me. Why don't you being an Athiests and obviuosly being smarter than us Creationists put yourself in my shoes and just pretend you are a Creationist how would you feel if this was about what you believe in? I'm not saying that Family Guy should take this off the air I love them and I think they're hilarious but just think using your head that is clear of anything that would get in its way like creationism. Just... Think

[–]fudgebucket27 0 points1 point ago

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Lol Seth mcfarlane is atheist you know aye.....

[–]Say_Ocean -2 points-1 points ago

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That's the same horrible humor as always, it's just that it applies to your atheist boner.*

*I am an atheist as well. It's just that this still isn't that funny.

[–]dreamCrush 0 points1 point ago

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I dunno maybe i'm overly sensitive but that episode made me kind of uncomfortable. It kinda goes back to the "Never go full retard" thing from Tropic Thunder. I have no problem laughing at a stupid person but when you cross the line over into "full retard" it just seems vaguely mean. I feel the same way about corky.

[–]rk9 0 points1 point ago

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the word occasionally cannot be stressed enough

[–]eddwardd95 0 points1 point ago

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i see hank hill

[–]downvoteonlyman 0 points1 point ago

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i read family guy, but the thumbnail looked like hank hill. i had a confuse

[–]ffca 0 points1 point ago*

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I know it's only a joke but I know some pretty damn smart creationists.

My best friend in high school for instance. We breezed through the Honors program, scored near-perfect on SATs (as did I), graduated with highest honors in biochem undergrad, aced the MCATs (better than me), and got step 1 250/99 and I think CK was 250+/99 as well (no comment).

Brilliant and religious guy. I tried arguing with him, but he doesn't use his brain to explain these beliefs. It's all about faith to him.

edit: MCATs are for medical school admision and step 1 and step 2 ck are part of the board exams

[–]KapnKrutch -4 points-3 points ago

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This is terrible. if I didn't love this subreddit this would be SRS-worthy.

[–]hairybalkan 2 points3 points ago

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Nothing is ever SRS worthy. You can't be "worthy" of something that's at the bottom of everything.

[–]themando 1 point2 points ago

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Seriously. No wonder Christians see /r/atheism as a bunch of Christian-haters. Upvote obviously insulting low-brow jokes and expect to be treated as if /r/atheism is some hollowed ground of dignity and respect.

[–]He11razor 3 points4 points ago

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You sound concerned.

[–]themando 4 points5 points ago*

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Perhaps I should've added some bold and some ಠ_ಠ? I've forgotten how this voicing-of-opinion thing works.

[–]phillycheese 7 points8 points ago

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Creationism is fucking STUPID. Creationists believe that dinosaurs and humans coexisted. This is something a 5 year old believes.

[–]Diskettenlaufwerk 0 points1 point ago

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I agree, but that doesn't mean the joke is funny. It's such a cheap shot. Similar to saying justin bieber is gay, even. People will laugh at it for no reason other than it confirms their beliefs

[–]Noobasdfjkl[S] 5 points6 points ago

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Again, for the third time, Evolutionism does not equal atheist.

[–]Slexx 1 point2 points ago

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I don't think this constitutes "Christian-hatred", nor do I think people here expect /r/atheism to be treated as if it's a hallowed* ground of dignity and respect. Obviously there's a lot of humor, a lot of frustration, and some sincere discussion. Nobody's pretending this is a place for nothing but respectful interfaith discourse.

Also, as others have said, hating creationism and mocking creationists is not at all the same as Christian-hate.

[–]straight_trippin -3 points-2 points ago

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gems? really?

[–]muskratpeters -2 points-1 points ago

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family guy is one big gem.

[–]sndzag1 -3 points-2 points ago

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This gets posted about once a month, and it's a pretty shallow argument. Oh, ok, everyone who is religious is stupider than a retarded person.

'aight. Facts. We love those.

[–]Slexx 1 point2 points ago

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Way to not read the comic.

[–]Rubix89 -4 points-3 points ago

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No, Family Guy is not funny despite it's attempt to easily appeal to atheist 'highbrow" humor.

[–]Slexx 1 point2 points ago

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You are confused about the meaning of the term "highbrow"

[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points ago

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I logged in just to say DIE REDDIT'S ATHEISTIC WHORES

btw I fuck your mom.