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Anti-Smoking Ad Fail (imgur.com)
submitted 7 months ago by [deleted]
[–]KhloeCardassian 136 points137 points138 points 7 months ago
The number one cause of death is being born.
[–][deleted] 75 points76 points77 points 7 months ago
The medical community is still baffled by the world's 100% death rate.
[–]ffca 3 points4 points5 points 7 months ago
Keanu Reeves.
Can't explain that.
[–]finallymadeanaccount 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
I can fix that: stop making babies!
[–]gsadamb 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
C-section time!
[–]LookAtMyHat 24 points25 points26 points 7 months ago
doesn't matter; stillborn
[–]appropriate_name 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
oh_u.jpg
[–]ParrotHere -22 points-21 points-20 points 7 months ago
[–][deleted] 11 points12 points13 points 7 months ago
Is it.. is it because you're a parrot? Are you supposed to be a novelty account..? But then why is this your only comment like this..? I want to believe in you..
[–]KingToasty 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
How long before subreddits start banning novelties?
Except POLITE_ALL_CAPS_GUY of course.
[–]FlyingPasta 5 points6 points7 points 7 months ago
Novelties can be fun.
[–]ParrotHere 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
I try and start off, and ya see.. I get down votes. How am I supposed to become a novalty account if I just get down votes, thanks.
[–]nuclearwar 109 points110 points111 points 7 months ago
1) Quit smoking.
2) Add 10 years to your life.
3) Start smoking again.
4) Return to step 1.
[–]ohrllyowl 43 points44 points45 points 7 months ago
Yea I quit smoking... every time I put out a cigarette.
[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 7 months ago
M..Methuselah??
[–]Scorm93 23 points24 points25 points 7 months ago
Troll science
[–]chatzimcfee 7 points8 points9 points 7 months ago
Yo, that's not troll science. It actually works. I read it somewhere. Give me proof it doesn't work.. you are the one making the claim that it doesn't work so you have to provide evvvidence.
[–]Scorm93 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
Just to humor you http://whyquit.com/whyquit/memorial.html
The man died four days after quitting.
[–]RedSquaree -3 points-2 points-1 points 7 months ago
you are the one making the claim that it doesn't work
Yeah, but in response to someone who said that it worked. The onus is not on the reader to disprove the writer.
[–]echolaliality 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
THAT'S THE JOKE.jpg
[–]RedSquaree 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
That .jpg shit needs to stop. It's terrible.
[–]echolaliality 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
sealof_approval.png
[–][deleted] 10 points11 points12 points 7 months ago
lol the cigarette just resets the timeline fool
you have to make sure you quit smoking JUST before youre about to die
thus you can walk in front of trucks etc and quit to survive
[–]icanflyagain 24 points25 points26 points 7 months ago
the question arises: if you knew you had a 2 out of 5 chance to become immortal by smoking, would you do it?
[–]aphasic 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
It depends, could I revoke the immortality later if I changed my mind? Perhaps by stopping smoking? Finding out I couldn't die, and sitting around bored until the heat death of the universe would suck.
Actually, that might make a good pro-smoking ad. "Smoking could kill you, but what else are you going to do? Sit around bored until the eventual heat death of the universe?"
[–]taylikes 4 points5 points6 points 7 months ago
http://imgur.com/HYTJV
[–]bananapanorama 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
Smoking could kill you,
that's why I vaporize.
[–]AstronautOne -1 points0 points1 point 7 months ago
How the
[–]DicksonYamada 3 points4 points5 points 7 months ago
Well since immortality is apparently overrated, I would have to say no. Of course, I would start smoking if it looked like I would be dying in the near future.
[–]clintmccool 7 points8 points9 points 7 months ago
"Apparently overrated"?
...Who do you know that is giving reviews of immortality?
[–]4chan_regular 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
General media.
You'd have to watch every person you've ever known and/or loved die, infinitely.
[–]clintmccool 4 points5 points6 points 7 months ago
I guess assuming you were somehow the only person to be immortal, then yeah...
[–]yesukai 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
The trick is to become a sociopath. If the only person you care about is you, then immortality rocks. For the first million years or so, at least.
[–]RobbyRatpoison 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
would you want to live past the death of the universe? i imagine it could take a while.
Fuck yeah. What's the worst that's going to happen? You take like... 10 years of your life? For a chance at being immortal? Fuck yeah.
[–]knestleknox 48 points49 points50 points 7 months ago
.....wrong meme usage?
[–]diegodlv 26 points27 points28 points 7 months ago
Last line should read, "Does that mean the other two are immortal?"
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 7 months ago
Point noted. I've seen enough non-question Philosoraptors to think it was pretty standard, but I should've realized that type of reckless rule breaking wouldn't fly in r/AdviceAnimals.
[–]chelidae 4 points5 points6 points 7 months ago
How could you, you horrible redditor? Using the wrong format for a meme? For shame.
[–]merrickx 5 points6 points7 points 7 months ago
Well, the poster had to change it up a bit. The first one said, "DO THE OTHER 2 BECOME IMMORTAL?"
The guilt of a repost tore OP inside enough that the OP felt compelled to add a twinge of originality to this philosraptor meme.
[–]The_Deathly_Seabear 6 points7 points8 points 7 months ago
I know you, Brian.
[–]livbird 16 points17 points18 points 7 months ago
100% of non-smokers die
[–]Ahh_Gene_Parmesan 8 points9 points10 points 7 months ago
Similarly, I remember reading in a high school history book that said that 9 people were injured in the Boston Massacre, 3 of which died later. This means that there are 6 people that never died and are still among us!
[–]pmk422 5 points6 points7 points 7 months ago
The fountain of youth was in New England not Florida.
[–]Dishank 5 points6 points7 points 7 months ago
reminds me of the "Drake and Josh" episode where they are going to parachute and Drake is bragging to his friend of how it is so dangerous. He says that only 3 out of four people make it to the ground.
[–]niloakash 4 points5 points6 points 7 months ago
The fourth is propelled upwards at a very high speed and can be seen flying across the sky as a huge ball of fire. We call him a comet.
[–]Azn_Bwin 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
nah man, he is out of space. We call him a space debris
[–]jjflips 3 points4 points5 points 7 months ago
Could be...
[–]Mako_Eyes 3 points4 points5 points 7 months ago
The oldest recorded human lived most of her life as a smoker.
[–]deadbydesign 3 points4 points5 points 7 months ago
gee, i think i'm going to start smoking!
[–]mattyice360 3 points4 points5 points 7 months ago
But there can be only one Highlander...
[–]toadkiller 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
I'll take those odds!
[–]clintmccool 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
Let's roll those dice!
[–]Diminutiveathome 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
a risk I am willing to take
[–]spiders_wrath 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
40% chance of immortality? Light me up, I like those odds!
[–]Preshead 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
I think I'll take the chances for immortality
[–]DrakeDealer 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
Sounds tempting.
[–]Preshead 4 points5 points6 points 7 months ago
First immortality, then the bitches.
[–]Yojimara 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
that's a hell of a risk, mate. I've got a 2/5ths chance of becoming a highlander if I start smoking.
[–]jart1987 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
Them aint bad odds
[–]dilligasatall 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
They didn't happen to mention what the other two were smoking did they?
[–]ziglander 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
I like those odds.
[–]OverzealousPanda 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
[–]inventingnothing 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
I'll take my chances then.
[–]imanuu 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
I start smoking 8 years ago so far I don't ihave nothing , I went to the doctor a couple of months ago and he told that my lungs were totally Clean and in perfect health , does that mean I'm number four? XD
[–]deigm 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
I like those odds!
[–]Langly- 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
Death by decapitation soon after.
[–]Barneey 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
Shouldn't the punchline be a question?
[–]ipickurf8 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
This is not how you use this meme...
[–]WinterInJapan 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
That's a 40% chance of eternal life.
Sign me up.
[–]Unhelpful_Scientist 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
As a Scientist I can confirm this is how all the studies I have coducted have resulted in, 3 of them die within a single puff but the other two...fuck they almost age backwards
[–]Death_By_Sexy 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
I like those odds...
[–]mrascii 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
I like them odds. I'm going to start smoking.
[–]afbaiuwe 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
I like those odds. grabs cigarette
[–]7h15guy 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
from how it sounds, I might start smoking
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
There can only be one!
[–]flyingfreak66 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
That is reason enough in my book.
[–]BobbyDuwitz 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
I'll take those chances!
[–]bill_hicks_quote 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
"I'm gonna tell you non-smokers something right now that I know for a fact you don't know, and I delight in telling my brothers things they don't know, particularly when they're true, which this is. Ready? Non-smokers...ready? Drumroll....(drumming sound)....Non-smokers die every day. (cackle) Sleep tight! You see, I know you entertain some kind of eternal life fantasy because you've chosen not to smoke; let me be the first to pop that fuckin' bubble and send you hurtling back to reality...you're dead too."
i like those odds!!
[–]Slarx 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
I guess I need to start smoking if gives me a 2/5 chance of becoming immortal!!
[–]cynicroute 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
I am forever... I am immortaaaalll!
[–]surells 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
I like those odds. Light me up.
[–]Constam 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
Best reason I've heard yet to start smoking.
[–]TorchicBlaziken 0 points1 point2 points 7 months ago
http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/35rva8/
Fixed. In a few weeks you can repost this version and nobody will notice, since this is Reddit.
[–]Ishaiah -6 points-5 points-4 points 7 months ago
The amount of mentally challenged in here is fucking overwhelming. Either you're all enjoying having the humor of an 8 year old, or you don't realize how fundamentally wrong this is. It's the same thing many pro-drug activists do: remove a contextually intrinsic piece of information, basing their point on what is essentially a sound-bite.
3 of out 5 smokers die from smoking.
That means 60% of all people frequently smoking will have a cause of death that can be directly related to their smoking habit.
It's the same shit with idea that nobody has ever died from smoking marijuana. Maybe not from an OD, but there are tons of people who have died from doing stupid shit while stoned. Drive stoned and get in a wreck and kill someone, that person died because someone was stoned. Climb on a fucking building while stoned, miss a handhold, fall and die. That person is dead because they smoked marijuana.
The idea that it doesn't matter that smoking kills you because everything to ever live has died is the most pathetic excuse for a valid point i have ever read in my life. If you consistently smoke, you are systematically destroying your body. The idea that this has no effect on your non-smoking habits is wrong. If you smoke, chances are you will have a battle with cancer or some other disease directly related to smoking before you die.
I am by no means anti-drug, and I believe marijuana should be legal. But I am continually shocked by the amount of ignorant bullshit that is spouted by the people claiming to be "above the ignorance".
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 7 months ago
Except your "facts" are wrong. There is no way to discern what the ailment is caused from. Smoking doesn't cause cancer, there is no discussion on that. Smoking increases health risks. You know what else increases health risks? Everything!!!
Having an accident when driving drunk doesn't mean it was caused because you were drunk, it just might be. People have accidents all the time.
Welcome to the world of "think of the children" radical neo-prohibitionists and making up statistics.
[–]mr3wolfmoon 1 point2 points3 points 7 months ago
You're not good with jokes, are you?
[–]bl1ksem 3 points4 points5 points 7 months ago
it's a joke
[–]GeneralSmedleyButsex 4 points5 points6 points 7 months ago
is this guy serious?
[–]zachmoe -1 points0 points1 point 7 months ago
talk about wild claims....
[–]snorkedsnorkedsnorke -2 points-1 points0 points 7 months ago
I highly doubt the ad that this is mocking even exists.
[–]Picklwarrior -1 points0 points1 point 7 months ago
So I have a 3 in 5 chance of not changing my circumstances, and a 2 in 5 of becoming immortal??
Picks up cigarette
all it takes is a username and password
create account
is it really that easy? only one way to find out...
already have an account and just want to login?
login
[–]KhloeCardassian 136 points137 points138 points ago
[–][deleted] 75 points76 points77 points ago
[–]ffca 3 points4 points5 points ago
[–]finallymadeanaccount 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]gsadamb 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–]LookAtMyHat 24 points25 points26 points ago
[–]appropriate_name 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]nuclearwar 109 points110 points111 points ago
[–]ohrllyowl 43 points44 points45 points ago
[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points ago
[–]Scorm93 23 points24 points25 points ago
[–]chatzimcfee 7 points8 points9 points ago
[–]Scorm93 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]RedSquaree -3 points-2 points-1 points ago
[–]echolaliality 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]RedSquaree 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]echolaliality 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–][deleted] 10 points11 points12 points ago
[–]icanflyagain 24 points25 points26 points ago
[–]aphasic 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]taylikes 4 points5 points6 points ago
[–]bananapanorama 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–]AstronautOne -1 points0 points1 point ago
[–]DicksonYamada 3 points4 points5 points ago
[–]clintmccool 7 points8 points9 points ago
[–]4chan_regular 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–]clintmccool 4 points5 points6 points ago
[–]yesukai 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]RobbyRatpoison 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]yesukai 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]knestleknox 48 points49 points50 points ago
[–]diegodlv 26 points27 points28 points ago
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points ago
[–]chelidae 4 points5 points6 points ago
[–]merrickx 5 points6 points7 points ago
[–]The_Deathly_Seabear 6 points7 points8 points ago
[–]livbird 16 points17 points18 points ago
[–]Ahh_Gene_Parmesan 8 points9 points10 points ago
[–]pmk422 5 points6 points7 points ago
[–]Dishank 5 points6 points7 points ago
[–]niloakash 4 points5 points6 points ago
[–]Azn_Bwin 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]jjflips 3 points4 points5 points ago
[–]Mako_Eyes 3 points4 points5 points ago
[–]deadbydesign 3 points4 points5 points ago
[–]mattyice360 3 points4 points5 points ago
[–]toadkiller 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–]clintmccool 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]Diminutiveathome 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–]spiders_wrath 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–]Preshead 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–]DrakeDealer 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–]Preshead 4 points5 points6 points ago
[–]Yojimara 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–]jart1987 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]dilligasatall 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]ziglander 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]OverzealousPanda 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]inventingnothing 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]imanuu 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]deigm 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]Langly- 2 points3 points4 points ago
[–]Barneey 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]ipickurf8 1 point2 points3 points ago
[–]WinterInJapan 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]Unhelpful_Scientist 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]Death_By_Sexy 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]mrascii 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]afbaiuwe 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]7h15guy 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]flyingfreak66 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]BobbyDuwitz 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]bill_hicks_quote 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]RobbyRatpoison 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]Slarx 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]cynicroute 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]surells 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]Constam 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]TorchicBlaziken 0 points1 point2 points ago
[–]snorkedsnorkedsnorke -2 points-1 points0 points ago
[–]Picklwarrior -1 points0 points1 point ago