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all 75 comments

[–]Lancey 76 points77 points ago

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I honestly did this once as a joke, thinking my GF at the time would see the funny side because she had the same sense of humour as me.

I have never been more wrong about anything in my life. Never.

[–]xmod2 34 points35 points ago

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Don't cast your pearls before swine.

[–]thapopjackson -1 points0 points ago

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It's been a long time since laughed at a pun like I did at this one.

[–]ThatsMisterDickToYou 11 points12 points ago

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Up there with:

1 "You know you make the same sounds as your mother."

2 During the post-coital stroking of thigh, belly, chest and face. "How about I get you gym membership?"

3 "You know you make the same sounds as your dad."

[–]ANewAccountCreated 1 point2 points ago

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Never a good idea to offend Rosie.

[–]Lancey 0 points1 point ago

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I do not understand this reference, please to explain.

[–]ANewAccountCreated 0 points1 point ago

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The (lame) joke was that Rosie was your girlfriend.

[–]Lancey 1 point2 points ago

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I see. That doesn't translate well to British English. We would have said "Mrs Palmer and her five daughters."

[–]nattetosti 22 points23 points ago

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I did actually use that quote in a post-coital context. The response I got was 'less oinking, more boinking'. God I miss that girl.

[–]elevenminus -1 points0 points ago

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that movie annoys me almost as much as this

[–]degenererad 15 points16 points ago

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[–]feelinweird 40 points41 points ago

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This Was the first thing that came to mind.

[–]silent_p 8 points9 points ago

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Why is she eating chicken in bed?

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points ago

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To intimidate the competition, obviously.

[–]MexicanJesusJuan 3 points4 points ago

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What, you don't? ಠ_ಠ

[–]crackshot91 8 points9 points ago*

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What is this from?

EDIT: Well, that was awesome. ಠ_ಠ

Sorry if anyone saw the deleted post. WTF, bro?

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]dashmunn 3 points4 points ago

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Don't click. For gods sake, DONT CLICK!

[–]TrainFan 2 points3 points ago

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I'm afraid to click but at the same time am very curious. What is it?

[–]darkshaddow42 0 points1 point ago

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A man fully sticking his foot into another man's anus. As far as NSFL goes that was pretty tame. Or maybe I've just been on the internet too long...

[–]bitch_im_a_lion 0 points1 point ago

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Is it an NSFL photo of something like a diseased penis or a penis being chopped off? If so it's the same guy that keeps getting his account deleted and then goes and makes another, it happens like every day, just report him any time you see it.

[–]darkshaddow42 0 points1 point ago

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Nope, not quite that bad. Although his account has been deleted, apparently.

[–]toastman92 1 point2 points ago

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THANKS FOR THE WARNING. ಠ_ಠ

[–]deejayalemus 0 points1 point ago

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[–]nfreni 15 points16 points ago

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I've actually said this to someone, and she laughed harder than I could ever imagine anyone would

[–]Stroger -5 points-4 points ago

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Same here :)

[–]JohnnyZampano 4 points5 points ago

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I heard this used somewhere, a movie or show or something...

Some guy was saying he had sex with a girl then right after he finished he said that line. Or some girl said someone did it to her.

This ringing a bell for anyone?

I haven't had a conversation with anyone in months so I know it didn't come from the "real world"

[–]taint_me 2 points3 points ago

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Couldn't find the video for it but in Family Guy Peter says that to Meg.

[–]WouldYouTurnMeOn 4 points5 points ago

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Doug Benson told this joke at a stand-up comedy special years ago. I'm not sure if he took the joke from somewhere else or thought of it himself.

[–]Cairne_Bloodhoof 0 points1 point ago

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I don't know where it's from, but I've seen this joke all over the internet for a while now.

[–]Cluckyx 4 points5 points ago

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I only ever did this once. I got punched in the cock for my troubles.

[–]silverbackjack 2 points3 points ago

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I think the reply to this should be, "you should stop fucking pigs"

[–]einsidler 2 points3 points ago

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Would go well with bacon lube

[–]yep45 1 point2 points ago

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[–]blackny97gsx 1 point2 points ago

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oh man, I saw a post on youtube that someone else made, but I couldn't get karma for it. Maybe if I take a screenshot of it and post it on reddit, I can get Karma!

[–]lightafluidsamwich 1 point2 points ago

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Doug Benson did it first...

[–]nelskickass 2 points3 points ago

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When I heard this line in Zombieland I lost my shit.

[–]DaHolk 1 point2 points ago

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[–]mjohniii 0 points1 point ago

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That'll do Pigly. That'll do.

[–]thehospitalbombers 1 point2 points ago

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Ohhhh, Krieger-san!

[–]mehatch 1 point2 points ago

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spoiler alert? please?

[–]Cynical_Lurker 5 points6 points ago

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It was his sled...

Sorry.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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lol, someone thinks they are special...

Here's a little newsflash:

you're not. you're an animal.

[–]Alabama_Man 17 points18 points ago

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Women (and men) are animals ask anybody whose taken a single biology class.

[–]RubberDuckOfHell 16 points17 points ago

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That'll do, Anti-Joke Chicken.

[–]The_Bonz 6 points7 points ago

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It's more funny because he's relating his penis to animals.

[–]Frankeh 6 points7 points ago

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It's funny because you're easily offended.

[–]ThisIsJesus 0 points1 point ago

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Just let it happen..

[–]DiamondShreddy 0 points1 point ago

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I like the concept of a woman.

[–]funkgerm -1 points0 points ago

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It's funny because there's no mention of women in OP's post at all.

[–]BBooster 0 points1 point ago

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Making her squeel is fine though.

[–]thelazerbeast 0 points1 point ago

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"That'll do Piggly, that'll do."

God I love Krieger.

[–]el3kt2ik 0 points1 point ago

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Disappointed by the lack of Woody Harrelson.

[–]hajlajf 0 points1 point ago

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Maybe I'll test this...

[–]mihoda 0 points1 point ago

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Why are you having sex with a pig?

[–]hdhrant 0 points1 point ago

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Unless you're Kermit the Frog.

[–]joeryanisaocelot 0 points1 point ago

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Better than my after-sex quote- "I think I farted out some juice."

[–]Belgian_Rofl 0 points1 point ago

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I'm glad I'm not alone in doing this.

[–]LinesOpen 0 points1 point ago

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I really thought this would be the link...

[–]Snowtiger01[!] 0 points1 point ago

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Ummm, I do this regularly :P It's always good for a laugh !!

[–]sotamatt 0 points1 point ago

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Doug Benson

[–]tbrean 0 points1 point ago

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This was a running joke with a friend up mine, along with the perceived lack of effort it took to get her in the sack. Posted this on her facebook a few months ago: http://i.imgur.com/jd5vD.jpg

[–]BigNikiStyle 0 points1 point ago

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Season 1, Drawn Together, Ling Ling to Toot Braunstein: "darabashee, Pig. Darabashee."

[–]emkael 0 points1 point ago

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[–]JohnBohlken09 1 point2 points ago

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That'll do donkey, that'll do.

[–]duchovny 0 points1 point ago

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You visit youtube.com as well?! We can be youtube buddies!

[–]mrp00sy -1 points0 points ago

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Stole the joke from doug benson

[–]Alabama_Man -3 points-2 points ago

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I actually do this. My GF is not amused but I save it for those times where she is completely unable to move afterwards, for my safety.

Edit: Unable to move because of an intense orgasm not some sort of bondage situation.

[–]apathetictroll -1 points0 points ago

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Isn't it the same thing?

[–]Alabama_Man 0 points1 point ago

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Nope.

[–]aMANescape -1 points0 points ago

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dad?

[–]BigTrollin -1 points0 points ago

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A man walks in to his bedroom holding a sheep under his arm. His wife is laying in bed and looks up. He says "Here's the pig I fuck when you have a headache." His wife says, "That's a sheep you dumbshit."

He replies, "I wasn't talking to you."

[–]levisss -2 points-1 points ago

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10 points to the house that hold the person that made that comment! lollollol