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top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]tripthelitefantastic 362 points363 points ago

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all I could think of was "the blade glows blue when orcs draw near"

[–]WhatAboutLightly 117 points118 points ago

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That speaks volumes about what goes on inside of your head.

[–]GolgiApparatus88 110 points111 points ago

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At least he doesn't have to worry about sex STDs

[–]MrClean87 4 points5 points ago*

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Says the 23 year old who names themselves after a structure within cell anatomy.

Sincerely,

The 24 year old with a full head of hair and no earring who names himself after a bald genie that loves cleaning shit.

EDIT: Damn...Genie cleans shit...earrings don't.

[–]Andy-J 1261 points1262 points ago

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"Our condoms change colors....so your dick doesn't"

[–]mezz42 161 points162 points ago

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What a way to find out. "hey umm...babe? You got herpes."

[–]stormholloway 204 points205 points ago

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I'd prefer it in the AOL email guy voice.

[–]Stompedyourhousewith 147 points148 points ago

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Whats AOL?

[–]wheresmyhouse 184 points185 points ago

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I imagine you're in your late 30s and just said that to make everybody else feel old.

[–]GalacticWhale 24 points25 points ago

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I'm not 30 but somehow reading that made me feel like it.

[–]operationblackwater 80 points81 points ago

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I think it was a movie with Tom Hanks!

[–]daskrip 37 points38 points ago

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No, that's You've Got Mail. I think AOL means being absent without actually having left.

[–]stormholloway 47 points48 points ago

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No, that's AWOL. AOL is that hot nymphy mermaid in that Disney movie.

[–]BigLurker 35 points36 points ago

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No, that's Ariel. AOL is something you shoot out of a bow

[–]Loneytunes 29 points30 points ago

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No thats an arrow silly, AOL is what Little Timmy fell in when Lassie rescued him!

[–]Ash_From_Housewares 32 points33 points ago

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No, that's a well. AOL is a garlic, olive oil and egg sauce

[–]Devilsdance 18 points19 points ago

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My experience with aol is limited to playing frisbee with the discs they used to mail

[–]lilythekitten 8 points9 points ago

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How the hell do you play frisbee with a floppy disc?

[–]DrunkmanDoodoo 5 points6 points ago

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The internet after SOPA

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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You've got a terrible life ahead of you!

[–]Strawcrazyman 2 points3 points ago

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Meh, herps ain't that bad.

[–]erisdiscordia 9 points10 points ago

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Yeah man, at least it ain't derps.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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Hey wait, what if the inside changes color for the guy has, outside to whatever the girl has!

[–]tangopopper 2 points3 points ago

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Have fun turning it inside out.

[–]Bad_Sex_Advice 190 points191 points ago

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Can't I have both?

[–]ilikayou 152 points153 points ago

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Por que no los dos?

[–]TheAtomicPlayboy 112 points113 points ago

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There's a taco joke here somewhere.

[–]Bujie_Smalls 67 points68 points ago

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If it changes colors, you should NOT eat forth meal.

[–]Malthusian1 14 points15 points ago

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What does this mean then?

[–]proteininja 44 points45 points ago

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Clasyphiliherpaids.

[–]OldSkoolGamer 6 points7 points ago

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[–]urinalbiscuit 5 points6 points ago

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☜(゚ヮ゚☜) This guy.

[–]Li5a 8 points9 points ago

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oh dear god you just made my fucking day

[–]pwnies 309 points310 points ago

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To be fair, they do turn a whitish yellow when they come in contact with a yeast infection.

[–]Wthtcat 494 points495 points ago

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True, and they can turn a darkish red when they come in contact with a menstrual cycle.

[–][deleted] 249 points250 points ago

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I often find that my bedsheets turn this color as well.

[–]Wthtcat 167 points168 points ago

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I read your username and am wondering if it's due to menstruation or lack of lube...

[–]Bad_Sex_Advice 255 points256 points ago

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Probably all of the strawberry jam.

[–]frasoftw 50 points51 points ago

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Well at least now we know where the yeast infection came from.

[–]RealSmithy 71 points72 points ago

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I'll try this next time. Thanks!

[–]CdeoD 24 points25 points ago

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I personally wouldn't be taking any sex advice from that guy.

[–]pizz0wn3d 13 points14 points ago

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Why? He s seems legit.

[–]buddybonesbones 5 points6 points ago

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or if by "darkish red" he meant brown.

[–]bonesaw_is_ready 34 points35 points ago

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[–]NoCondom 26 points27 points ago

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.jpg

Woah...

What's next, .jpgs with sound?

[–]atomicoption 7 points8 points ago

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it's not really a jpg tinypic just renamed the gif for the url and your browser is smart enough to ignore that.

[–]traxxasmaniac 27 points28 points ago

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Woah...

What's next, .jpgs with sound?

Mind=Blown http://i54.tinypic.com/ncfvqd.docx

[–]ScotteeMC 242 points243 points ago

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[–]J0kester 201 points202 points ago

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Everyone who sees this link is waiting for a comment explaining if it's safe to see. Sorry guys and girls, this isn't that comment. waits

[–]ThizzardofOz 86 points87 points ago

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Don't worry, it's just Bubbles.

[–]J0kester 44 points45 points ago

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This comment has been verified.

[–]beforebendetta 14 points15 points ago

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This convention has been nullified

[–]Assmar 30 points31 points ago

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This convent has been nunnified.

[–]lemurstep 15 points16 points ago

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This nun has been conned.

[–]igge- 12 points13 points ago

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That's terrible!

[–]jibberia 14 points15 points ago

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Somebody spotted a Samsquantch.

[–]stormholloway 19 points20 points ago

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This should always be the minimum size for gifs.

[–]hanktheskeleton 21 points22 points ago

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It's safe.

[–]TroutM4n 12 points13 points ago

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hanktheskeleton is trustworthy.

[–]joehouse 4 points5 points ago

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Verified. It's safe

[–]diamondsknives 13 points14 points ago

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I'm gagging.

[–]A_WILD_COCK_APPEARS 57 points58 points ago

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Nice to meet you gagging!

I'm a wild cock

[–]ANewAccountCreated 17 points18 points ago

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Excuse me while I vomit.

[–]MollyRocket 23 points24 points ago

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Who has sex while they have a yeast infection? I can't even stand the idea of a penis being around me, let alone in me when I have a yeast infection.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]collegedropout 28 points29 points ago

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Sometimes they're subtle, it's not always a full-blown infection.

[–]cuntmuffn 3 points4 points ago

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I used to get chronic yeast infections and sometimes ended up having sex while having one. I never did when i was using monistat or anything but it wasn't painful.

[–]marshmallowhug 3 points4 points ago

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I had a yeast infection for half a year because the symptoms had disappeared enough that I thought it had gone away. It hadn't.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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There's a point between when the infection starts and the point where you are so infected that you actually become aware of it (i.e. chunky white stuff is actually falling out of you). If you have sex during this time, there's a good chance that the guy is going to pull out and find... well... I don't really want to describe what it looks like.

Basically, if your girlfriend's vagina doesn't feel as warm as normal, and if it feels kind of spongy instead of silky and wet, then you should probably pull out and check yourself.

[–]Dolewhip 13 points14 points ago

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You sound like you get them on a weekly basis or something.

[–]Siethron 164 points165 points ago

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My last one was a rainbow O.O

[–]wilc8650 284 points285 points ago

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That just means you are a homosexual. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[–]ULJarad 111 points112 points ago

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Taste the rainbow!

[–]Gingerbread_Girl 123 points124 points ago

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It tastes like salt, and shame.

[–]Shannonigans 41 points42 points ago

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Damn it, you guys. ಠ_ಠ

[–]mattv1 25 points26 points ago

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And santorum

[–][deleted] 31 points32 points ago

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(THE FROTHY MIXTURE OF LUBE AND FECAL MATTER THAT IS SOMETIMES THE BYPRODUCT OF ANAL SEX)

[–]Eilif 2 points3 points ago

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Why is there a word for that. Why. Why.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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Because people (including Dan Savage, who is a well-known sex advice columnist and also a homosexual) don't like Mister Santorum, so they equated his name with THE FROTHY MIXTURE OF LUBE AND FECAL MATTER THAT IS SOMETIMES THE BYPRODUCT OF ANAL SEX. It is also my duty to explain to everyone that santorum is THE FROTHY MIXTURE OF LUBE AND FECAL MATTER THAT IS SOMETIMES THE BYPRODUCT OF ANAL SEX.

Also, if you don't understand what Savage's homosexuality has to do with it, I think it'll suffice to tell you that Santorum is against homosexuality.

[–]CubedRoot 1 point2 points ago

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With all the hype over santorum, Im not sure this comment was necessary.

[–]bdog2g2 26 points27 points ago

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Tastes like shit.

[–]utd87sin 10 points11 points ago

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heh

[–]stormholloway 11 points12 points ago

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No, that means he was having sex with a homosexual. Big difference.

[–]mavrick45 14 points15 points ago

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thats a good thing, right?

[–]chronowerx 11 points12 points ago

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ಠ_ಠ

[–]WouldYouTurnMeOn 16 points17 points ago

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You've got everything.

[–]koakreeper 35 points36 points ago

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Mr. Bond you have every STD ever discovered, including a few only previously found in sharks.

[–]Atario 2 points3 points ago

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Doctor: Mr. Burns, I'm afraid you are the sickest man in the United States. You have everything.
Mr. Burns: You mean I have pneumonia?
Doctor: Yes.
Mr. Burns: Juvenile diabetes?
Doctor: Yes.
Mr. Burns: Hysterical pregnancy?
Doctor: Uh, a little bit, yes. You also have several diseases that have just been discovered — in you.
Mr. Burns: I see. You sure you haven't just made thousands of mistakes?
Doctor: Uh, no, no, I'm afraid not.
Mr. Burns: This sounds like bad news.
Doctor: Well, you'd think so, but all of your diseases are in perfect balance. Uh, if you have a moment, I can explain.
Mr. Burns: Well...
[looks at his watch]
[the Doctor puts a tiny model house door on his desk]
Doctor: Here's the door to your body, see?
[brings up some small fuzz balls with goofy faces and limbs from under the desk]
Doctor: And these are oversize novelty germs.
[points to a different one up as he names each disease]
Doctor: That's influenza, that's bronchitis,
[holds up one]
Doctor: and this cute little cuddle-bug is pancreatic cancer. Here's what happens when they all try to get through the door at once.
[tries to cram a bunch through the model door. The "germs" get stuck]
Doctor: [Stooge-like] Woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo. Move it, chowderhead.
[normal voice]
Doctor: We call it, "Three Stooges Syndrome".
Mr. Burns: So what you're saying is, I'm indestructible.
Doctor: Oh, no, no, in fact, even slight breeze could...
Mr. Burns: Indestructible.

[–]jxfallout 18 points19 points ago

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Taste the rainb...ohh....

[–]mukman 4 points5 points ago

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ABORT! ABORT!

[–]reddiculon 49 points50 points ago

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Instead of having to engage in actual sex in order to discover the presence (or lack) of disease, why not use the same hypothetical material to make a glove that can be used to administer pre-intercourse inspections (cleverly disguised as foreplay)?

[–]esuma10 32 points33 points ago

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and as a plus, it would make your gynocologist roleplay fetish look more official

[–]atomicoption 5 points6 points ago

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You sir are a genius!

Although to be fair, if this product existed and was reliable (or let's be honest even if it was only somewhat reliable) people would have a lot more unprotected sex and probably end up with more unwanted pregnancies.

Still, worth it.

[–]Deergoose 23 points24 points ago

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Take this idea to ask.science

I have a feeling that it will get shot down pretty easily with regards to actual feasibility.

[–]mattxblack 24 points25 points ago

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[–]IrritableGourmet 2 points3 points ago

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My dad works with a guy who built a device that can measure the mass of a bacteria on a nanoscale oscillator. Since different bacteria have different masses, you can use it to determine what the bacteria is really quickly with a small sample. They're also working on nanoscale RFID devices. Couple the two together, sprinkle them on some latex, and your phone can tell you what you're getting in to.

[–]weasler7 2 points3 points ago

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Well, that device is dependent on putting a single bacteria on the nanoscale oscillator. It's not going to work when you have vaginal discharge/fluid ruining your oscillator probe.

[–]doctorcrass 6 points7 points ago

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One of the major problems is that cost effectiveness is one of the most important factors in condom production. Nobody wants to buy a 35 dollar condom.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points ago

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I would buy a 35 dollar instant std test, test comes back clean then there is no need for the condom.

[–]rinic 15 points16 points ago

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Except for the no-babies part.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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Look at all the current methods of birthcontrol available , if STDs weren't a factor I personally would choose other methods.

[–]everbeard 3 points4 points ago

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We have pills for that.

[–]bluntmonster 52 points53 points ago

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People with STDs just wouldn't wear condoms. Might make things a little more dangerous.

[–]Draws_Ur_Username 17 points18 points ago

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[–]Atifex 17 points18 points ago

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Wouldn't that just be a sign that said person has an STD?

I mean sure, drunk people are fucked but hey...drunk sex involves risk already :P

[–]That1GuyWitDaC4 5 points6 points ago

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yeah they wouldn't. they would get embarrassed and I bet finding out someone has an STD is a turn off.

[–]dezmodium 8 points9 points ago

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Rule 34? There has to be some weird fucks on the internet who are attracted to STD folks.

[–]ramsay_baggins 11 points12 points ago

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It's called bugchasing/bugcatching.

I had a total WTF moment when I found out they existed. So gross.

[–]BillOReillysCumSock 4 points5 points ago

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[–]everyday847 17 points18 points ago

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SERIOUS RESPONSE TO SOMETHING IN /R/FUNNY:

As a chemist, I'm pretty sure this would make condoms cost about triple what they do now, even once there's the technology to do this. If anyone's interested, I can go into what would actually be involved.

[–]LesEnfantsTerribles 5 points6 points ago

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Please do elaborate.

[–]everyday847 3 points4 points ago

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So here's what's required:

  1. Someone has to identify a receptor or other molecule unique to each STD-causing infectious agent. I don't know off the top of my head if this has been done; it may not actually be possible. Even if it is, it could take a while.
  2. You have a couple choices for this one. Either identify a single molecule that binds to all of them, and for which each ligand changes its fluorescence frequency from something invisible (probably UV) to something visible (and visually distinct--let's shoot for a 50 nm difference), or multiple molecules each of which binds to one or more of them and have the same fluorescence effect as previously described.
  3. All these fluorescent molecules have to bind only as many of the set of unique viral/bacterial proteins as you intend, no more, because otherwise you'll get one molecule turning yellow because of HIV (intended) and another (maybe this is the anti-clap molecule) turning green because of HIV.
  4. Also none of these effects can quench the others.
  5. Oh, by the way, unless the aforementioned molecule(s) can enter the cells/ viral capsids of all the infectious agents in question, you need to have found a unique membrane small molecule from each of them, making your problem far harder.
  6. This molecule/combination of molecules have to be stable at room temperature, nontoxic/preferably not easily absorbed topically, orally, vaginally, or anally...

[–]andrewsmith1986 170 points171 points ago

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I bet it would increase the murder rate.

[–]Ron_Mahogany 309 points310 points ago

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and the side effect would be lower STD rates.

WIN WIN

[–]FormerContra 99 points100 points ago

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This is literally perfect. Gas prices fall, building costs are alleviated, our carbon footprint is decreased, the food market would get restructured. What is wrong with this?

[–]Maniacal 42 points43 points ago

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Unless it is murder-suicides, the prison population will grow even more.

[–]FormerContra 37 points38 points ago

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We'd have no choice but to dissolve the prison system!!!! This is basically utopia!!

[–]HydraCarbon 34 points35 points ago

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Can we all have puppies? I would feel a lot more comfortable with this whole utopia thing if I got a puppy.

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points ago

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Puppies for some, kittens for some, miniature Utopia flags for people with histamine problems.

[–]diuge 13 points14 points ago

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People with histamine problems would be unhappy, though.

We should just kill those people.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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I agree with this and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

[–]Gortos 4 points5 points ago

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Make murder legal? This also solves your proplem with your mother-in-law and your crazy neighbour!

[–]rellefg8 2 points3 points ago

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Legalize weed get all those criminals out, put new guys in...

[–]floppy_camel_anus 2 points3 points ago

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No, just bring in the death penalty. Oh wait you guys already have that. Ok, make it easy for anyone to get sentenced to death. Even the mentally retarded.. Oh wait.

Merica, fuck yeah.

[–]PARSLEYsage 5 points6 points ago

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Even the colorful condom trash-islands off the coast of Australia could be like a tourist attraction.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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Making people paranoid about getting an STD sounds like a good thing to me.

[–]spankr 88 points89 points ago

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Only $352,895 each!

[–]unconscionable 46 points47 points ago

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And it doesn't work™

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]yaredw 2 points3 points ago

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Too soon.

[–]Joekster 74 points75 points ago

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Stomp em in the nuts?

[–]DoctorateofWumbology 58 points59 points ago*

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BOOTY BUTT BOOTY BUTT BOOTY BUTT CHEEKS (ninja editted for thugnificence)

[–]full_on_robot_chubby 23 points24 points ago

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There should be an additional "butt" between the "booty" and the "cheeks."

[–]fragglestickcar 16 points17 points ago

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Stomp-em-stomp-em in the nuts

[–]psmart101 3 points4 points ago

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Fuck Granddad.

[–]multiplesifl 20 points21 points ago*

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I wonder if Dick-Riding Obama would change your condom's color...

edit: It's from The Boondocks, people!

[–]Tom2Die 2 points3 points ago

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upvoted. and all the replies. because I love that show. And I'm white as a sheet.

How you gonna drop the gun, Gangstalicious‽ That is not gangsta!

[–]larrisonw 63 points64 points ago

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clicking here, all I could think of was:

"please no relevant_rule34 posts..."

"please no relevant_rule34 posts..."

"please no relevant_rule34 posts..."

"please no relevant_rule34 posts..."

[–]ClumsyRapist 61 points62 points ago

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i think you were hoping for a relevant_rule34 post.

[–]Richard_Jae 10 points11 points ago

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You know he's like Beetlejuice right? You've just summoned him.

[–]NinjaSkillz810 10 points11 points ago

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Funny, I was thinking the opposite.

[–]kra1os 45 points46 points ago

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That'll make a perfect litmus test.

[–]jacKofKats 74 points75 points ago

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Or even a lick muff test.

[–]poorly_timed_gimli 39 points40 points ago

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OR MY AXE!

[–]jacKofKats 18 points19 points ago

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(wound)

[–]drtide4 25 points26 points ago

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[–]PopeTimus 13 points14 points ago

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That awkward moment when your condom comes out looking like mud.

[–]yer_momma 26 points27 points ago

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Wrong hole

[–]PopeTimus 27 points28 points ago

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I think you mean the right hole, baby.

[–]ninioquiroz 5 points6 points ago

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Let them fictional gansta rappers show us the way...

[–]tanstaafl89 30 points31 points ago

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what color for crazy?

[–]stickdudeseven 14 points15 points ago

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Sepia Tone.

[–]StillAnAss 11 points12 points ago

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The problem is that you won't know till you've already stuck your dick in it. By then it is too late and no condom can help that.

[–]plefe 11 points12 points ago

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EVERYBODY WAIT JUST A SECOND! Wouldn't you want to know before you stick your dick in it and not after?

[–]Cartman-kw 3 points4 points ago

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a $150 condom. great idea not great deal.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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I would pay 150 to not get herpes... just sayin

[–]ExcellentToEachOther 2 points3 points ago

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If only STD detection in the labs would be that easy...

[–]HiddenTemple 10 points11 points ago

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What color would it turn if she ACTUALLY orgasms? [insert "not that i would need to know" joke]

[–]Ashl 6 points7 points ago

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Oh blue, she has aids no proble...oh fuck,

[–]arabidopsis 5 points6 points ago

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But what few people realise is that you can get chlamydia from your eyes..

(The bacteria loves moist places on your body, hence why it lives in vagina/dick and also eyes, but not mouth)

[–]samofny 7 points8 points ago

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Contact lenses should change different colors according to whatever STD they come in contact with.

[–]MarcusHauss 2 points3 points ago

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Get ready honey, cause tonight i'll eat you out..

..with my face..

YEEEEAAAHHHHHH!!!!

[–]TubbyCustard 5 points6 points ago

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What about mood condoms? Condoms that change color depending on your emotional state?

[–]trollface-downvote 13 points14 points ago*

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matches dick color with the strips on the box

apparently the condom says I'm horny! as if this raging boner didn't already clue me in...

[–]cmonroy 13 points14 points ago

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I have a raging clue right now

[–]calvinvle 2 points3 points ago

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Think about the awkward moment when you pull out and your dick is purple. You'll look into her eyes and tell her to get the fuck out.

[–]myVoteIsEarned 3 points4 points ago

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Upvote for showing me Thugnificant was on twitter

[–]jeffdude 2 points3 points ago

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How would you know if it came from the "wearer" or the "wearee"?

[–]SquireOfFire 4 points5 points ago

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No it's not. False negatives.

"Oh, guess I don't need it then!"

Also, false positives would ruin the sexytimes needlessly.

I think you're better off just using normal condoms.

[–]lolowhat 2 points3 points ago

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Gotta catch em all!

[–]dazedconfusedlost 2 points3 points ago

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it's thugniificent

[–]Shellinator 2 points3 points ago

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Like litmus paper, or Universal Indicator.

[–]B0h1c4 5 points6 points ago

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This reminds me of an awesome idea for an invention that I heard Adam Corolla talk about many years ago on Lovelines.

He said that someone should invent a tube of antiseptic liquid similar to those used in old time barber shops to store combs. The liquid would kill any virus or bacteria. So if you have a questionable bareback experience you could buy one of these things, break the seal, and dunk your cock and balls into it. Put the lid back on it and throw it away.

[–]AcerRubrum 19 points20 points ago

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Sounds great, but STD transmission comes from bodily fluids that come out during sex like precum and pussy juice. You may disinfect the outside, but as soon as you start pounding it youre transmitting stuff.

[–]Dildo_Ball_Baggins 5 points6 points ago

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Herpes would show bright red writing along the shaft: "NOPE"

[–]GFandango 4 points5 points ago

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My condom somehow turns red when my wife's been unhappy.

[–]medicinalman 1 point2 points ago

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Taste the rainbow?

[–]Cat_Boy 1 point2 points ago

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Wait..they don't already? Oh boy...

[–]Svx_blue 1 point2 points ago

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Too bad he posted that in public - now someone else will get rich off the ideal.

[–]SlappaDaBass 1 point2 points ago

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something something taste the rainbow...

[–]fragglestickcar 1 point2 points ago

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I beat up old people because Thugnificent does it and that makes it cool.

[–]Anonymous_Bosch 1 point2 points ago

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Someone should tell doctors this technology exists, because I had to wait a week for my STD test results.

[–]chimchim64 1 point2 points ago

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I vote for polka-dots.

[–]OscarMiguelRamirez 1 point2 points ago

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Great idea, dumb statement since it's really not possible.

[–]ShootinAload 1 point2 points ago

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Good for STD prevention, terrible for my erection.

[–]makeskidskill 1 point2 points ago

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Taste the rainbow!

[–]spGT 1 point2 points ago

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Those would be some expensive condoms

[–]mizooknow 1 point2 points ago

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what color should it be if it comes in contact with herpagonnasypalis?

[–]ultrafetzig 2 points3 points ago

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Neapolitan.

[–]A_WILD_COCK_APPEARS 1 point2 points ago

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What about a color for us untamed cocks out there?

[–]dajodge 1 point2 points ago*

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Edit:

Hundreds of redditors rush to their computers simultaneously to make the same joke about it looking like a rainbow

[–]loothelion 1 point2 points ago

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But I'm Colorblind O.O

[–]Kpac_0000 1 point2 points ago

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Gives a whole new meaning to pulling out early.

[–]DaGooglist 1 point2 points ago

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I am incredibly disappointed at the lack of Boondocks jokes in this thread.

[–]jozaud 1 point2 points ago

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just popping in to say that I love the Boondocks. such a great comic and show.

[–]Ebonyks 1 point2 points ago

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While great in concept, this is rather impractical in implementation. STD clinic nurse here.

The main problem is that it would only theoretically work with viral STD's, such as HIV. The latex of the condom would have to have a small pad integrated in it which would contain a simple eliza test, which would react if HIV is present. Then, additional pads could be added to test for different diseases. For reference, the clinic I work at pays about 20 dollars each for these tests.

The issue is that bacterial infections, which are far, far more common in the western world, cannot be tested as easily. Generally, patients are treated by symptoms, as opposed to by testing (Results of tests are gathered after treatment starts). Confirming a bacterial infection typically involves microscopic analysis of the sample, as well as proper staining to see if the specific bacteria can be tested.

TL;DR-Sounds cool, but it really wouldn't work and visually wouldn't be as appealing as our collective imagination makes it. It'd look more like a urine dipstick than a tie-dye shirt.

[–]pibroch 1 point2 points ago

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I have the weirdest colored boner right now.

[–]Thugnificint 1 point2 points ago

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I'm taking credit for this.

[–]mOdQuArK 1 point2 points ago

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What color does it turn if there are multiple STDs. Goes to a multi-color pattern? Plaid? Paisley?

[–]calrdt12 1 point2 points ago

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The only better way, IMHO, is a "dipstick" that show which color your dick will be if you were to get a particular disease. Red and blotchy, solid green, maybe a light yellow. OR... An STD bio dye pack if you will. If there's a disease, it goes off and warns the next guy or disappears with an antibiotic/antiviral treatment.

I work in healthcare and fully endorse this idea.