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1002
1003

Mush! (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by Goldbear

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[–]longhornmoreau 88 points89 points ago

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What's actually happening is in reality funnier than the picture. This is from a special on Fox from either the late 90s or early 00s, something along the lines of Man vs. Beast. The little people are competing against an elephant to see who can drag a jet across a runway.

Just one Fox.

[–]WARGLBARGL 21 points22 points ago

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my favorite was watching the giraffe vs the sprinter. the animals won everything except for the monkey on a obstacle course who lost to a navy seal. i like to think it's a tie. animals undefeated.

[–]omothafuckingg 13 points14 points ago

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I liked watching Kobayashi vs a bear in the hot dog eating contest of the century!

[–]Perryn 40 points41 points ago

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"It appears the bear is now eating Kobayashi. We're going to the judges for this...and yes, it does appear that the hot dogs Kobayashi ate now count for the bear."

[–]Tactful 11 points12 points ago

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THE SECRET INGREDIENT IS... HOT DOGGU.

[–]flaccid_member 0 points1 point ago

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The secret ingredient is....KOBAYASHI!

[–]marsneedstowels 0 points1 point ago

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KOBAYASHI!

[–]Owncksd 1 point2 points ago

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I'd say the only reason the SEAL won was because the monkey decided what they were doing was incredibly stupid and pointless and lost interest.

Also, relevant (and hilarious) CRACKED article.

[–]sushiaddict 1 point2 points ago

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well the tree climber actually beat the monkey as well, but he lost when he said he could go up and down twice in the time the monkey took to do it once.

[–]Jman5 2 points3 points ago*

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The Human beat the Giraffe. It was the Zebra who beat the human. Even then, it was pretty close.

You know the truth of the matter is Humans are actually pretty bad ass physically speaking. It's just whenever we compare ourselves to other animals it's ones that are known for a specific attribute. So of course our vision seems crappy when you compare it to a bald eagle. Our strength seems paltry when you put us up against a silver back gorilla. And our hearing is poor compared to a bat.

But what animal out there is stronger, faster, superior in sight/smell/hearing, has higher endurance, and better agility?

I don't think there is a single species out there that is as physically well rounded as the Human being. And when it comes to endurance running, we're basically the best on the planet. The only exception is our sense of smell sucks.

Even without our big brains, we're pretty OP in the Animal Kingdom.

[–]WARGLBARGL 1 point2 points ago

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stronger, faster, superior in sight/smell/hearing and better agility?

tigers

[–]Belial4 1 point2 points ago

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Ligers >

[–]Jman5 -1 points0 points ago

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We see better in the day and can run longer than a tiger.

[–]whoami9 0 points1 point ago

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The endurance thing is because we're somehow the only animal that can breathe properly and run for extended periods of time. There are some tremendously fast animals out there, but they lack endurance because they can't breath properly while running that fast. We can also sweat to release heat so we don't have to pant.

There are tribes that practice persistence hunting which is when you literally run an animal to death by exhaustion. Even though the animal is much faster and can open up a huge lead, the humans know how to track it, and come at from several directions to force it away from any water sources. Fairly rare practice now, but its a very old one.

[–]No6BuiltMyHotrod 0 points1 point ago

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But what animal out there is stronger, faster, superior in sight/smell/hearing, has higher endurance, and better agility?

A mountain lion? Tiger? Wolves, and even house cats (pound for pound).

I'm sure there are plenty.

[–]Jman5 1 point2 points ago

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We have better vision than cats and dogs during the day. We can also see farther and can see a wider spectrum of colors.

I would also argue that we could out-fight a mountain lion, a wolf and obviously a small house cat. (pound for pound is a pointless comparison because pound for pound some lowly microbe probably beats us all) Almost all deaths from mountain lions have been small children or old people. Young men have a pretty good track record of fighting them off even when ambushed.

And yes, in an endurance race we are practically unparalleled in this. The only animal that can give us a run for our money is the horse, which we have bred for thousands of years specifically for this task. Even then it's a close race.

They actually have a 22 mile race every year in Great Britain man vs horse. There are some years where the human wins.

Just because we don't have claws, doesn't mean we aren't a formidable creature. Remember, it was homo-X vs wild every day before our ancient ancestors figured out that throwing rocks is a good skill to have.

I think you give us too little credit.

[–]No6BuiltMyHotrod 1 point2 points ago

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Well, I'd argue that out-fighting and being stronger than are two entirely different concepts.

Even if they weren't, old Aesop describes it succinctly: One animal is fighting for a meal. The other is fighting for its life.

Put an unarmed man in a cage with a mountain lion that legitimately fears for its life (if such an internal process could be quantified) and I'll put my money on the mountain lion. Divorce intelligence from the equation. Pure strength vs. itself on strange sides of the phylogenetic trunk.

Comparing animals pound for pound is, I think, a legitimate method of considering creatures in this equation. Yes, certain microorganisms and viruses and such will be more "formidable" than most other animals - and that's the way it should be. Is it uncomfortable to consider that as a creature grows more sophisticated, it niches out and becomes "weaker"? Perhaps. But that's the way it goes.

We may have beaten horses in this endurance race (which I had no knowledge of - thanks for introducing me) - but only twice.

Consider if the horse could act independently, without a rider. Consider how their endurance would change. I'm willing to bet man would not have won those races.

Additionally, you make a distinction between artificial and natural evolutionary processes which I'd consider meager and nigh indistinguishable on the evolutionary scale.

It is true we have superior daytime vision with respect to felines and canines. But you did not acknowledge that we are unsatisfactory in light of smell, hearing, endurance, agility and strength. Ergo, I'd have to chalk being the "best" well-rounded animal to, well, not humanity.

[–]Jman5 -1 points0 points ago

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But this is my point. You're taking some of the top animals for specific attributes and disqualifying the human.

Just take the horse for example (which in my view would only be a fair comparison if you used a pre-domesticated sub-species). Sure it can compete with us in 1 respect, but what about fighting, sight, hearing? How agile is a hoofed animal if it got in a scrap? Seems to me that the only way it would win is if the human came in from behind and got kicked.

Don't underestimate the effects selective breeding can have on a species. Compare wild fruits and grains with domesticated fruits/grains, Dachshund with wolves, or even the modern monstrosity we've created with the Milk Cow.

[–]No6BuiltMyHotrod 0 points1 point ago

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I used the horse as an extension of your example and commented on it. That's all.

Additionally, however, I'd put a startled horse over a human any day in a fight. There is a reason why police use horses for riot scenarios - you can punch and kick a horse all you want. It ain't stopping. A wild horse will kick your ass, particularly if its mating season, or it believes its life is in danger.

Still, a horse is your example.

What I tried to convey with regard to artificial vs. natural selection was that I don't understand why they need to be distinguished from one or the other with regard to this hypothetical you've presented. Because we helped things along? We found certain traits more useful, and decided to put our fingers in the process?

If it exists in the natural world, it is natural. Change to a thing via conscious, sentient processes does prescribe this certain thing to have more or less meaning on the cosmic scale.

Before I run myself into a nihilist ditch, the point I'm making is that I can't see an argument made against including or otherwise attributing special status to a breed, species, genus or whatever simply because an external variable sparked a change here or there - because that's what evolution is. Humans move north, and grew hairier and paler. We did that. So what?

We're looking at the best of any one species and comparing them unfairly to one another.

[–]PresidentJonStewart 0 points1 point ago

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giraffe vs sprinter

[–]Hazlzz 0 points1 point ago

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That episode was hilarious. The ape obviously just loses interest in hanging from some dumb bar, and the commentators are super excited about it.

[–]Sojoez 7 points8 points ago

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"Lets take a look at this race in slow motion"

WTF?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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I watched the video and it was close. Which makes me think that if they used regular sized people, then the elephant would have lost.

They wanted the little people to lose!

[–]mrshabadoo 1 point2 points ago

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The elephant won if im not mistaken. Sad day for the little people.

[–]xiipaoc 0 points1 point ago

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2002 or 2003. I remember watching this my freshman year of college.

[–]NotoriousFIG 0 points1 point ago

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Anybody notice the guy in the front-middle was on the Man Show?

[–]PalliMoon 0 points1 point ago

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Wow, I always assumed it was a photoshop. Also wondered where the hell the source picture came from, it had to be a bunch of little people dragging something...

[–]x2sean1x 10 points11 points ago

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Job creation in the US?

[–]golfhacker20 21 points22 points ago

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I'm a little concerned they're being exploited

[–]crazy8ty8 3 points4 points ago

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They always are getting the short end of the stick.

[–]findingchemo 9 points10 points ago

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I'm more concerned they midget back problems

[–]thisisnotthought 2 points3 points ago

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This is stunting the growth of equality.

[–]screenshotted 0 points1 point ago

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These are really coming to a new low.

[–]sprankton 1 point2 points ago

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Have you ever tried to break a half-inch-long stick? These guys are safe.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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If that happens we should send them get well cards in short order.

[–]Goldbear[S] 25 points26 points ago

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I found this on Stumbleupon.

[–]DerpJohnson 13 points14 points ago

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Why is this downvoted? He's giving credit to the source.

[–]AladdinP 14 points15 points ago

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I didn't downvote him, but StumbleUpon isn't really a source. It's like saying Reddit is your source when all it is is a collection of links.

[–]azsincitymagic 6 points7 points ago

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With the worlds population growing Santa needed a bigger sleigh!

[–]bugalaman 4 points5 points ago

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They didn't even have the courtesy to retract the flaps and slats. Why not just engage the thrust reversers while you're at it?

[–]Perryn 4 points5 points ago

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How much would I have to pay to see that?

[–]machetedamadman 4 points5 points ago

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This is why reindeer shouldn't have labor unions.

[–]MrPeterWiggin 7 points8 points ago

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wat.

[–]Goldbear[S] 4 points5 points ago

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who.

[–]Beefyous 2 points3 points ago

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Who? i believe one of them is Ozzie Osbourne, but thats the only "who" i know :/

[–]bakedfreshdaily 3 points4 points ago

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Why.

[–]The_designer_pro 3 points4 points ago

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when?

[–]AnHonestQuestions 1 point2 points ago

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Where?

[–]MrAsymo 2 points3 points ago

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HOW?

[–]ConstipatedNinja 4 points5 points ago

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Huh?

[–]Rule33 1 point2 points ago

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wat.who.Why.when?Where?HOW?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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What your doing isn't exactly karma whoring, but I see this shit on a lot if threads and it has the same result. You all stroke each other with upvotes and think its so funny and OG

[–]stopitrightmeow 5 points6 points ago

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this should definitely go under r/WTF

[–]AriBBCP 3 points4 points ago

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no

[–]MisplacedTopComment 2 points3 points ago

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Jurassic Park confused a lot of people.

[–]dan420 2 points3 points ago

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That's how the plane takes off?!

[–]HalfRations 2 points3 points ago

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Today on Mythbusters..

[–]TeCuervo 2 points3 points ago

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"How many midgets does it take to pull a jet?" belongs in askscience

[–]Aviator8989 2 points3 points ago

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44 little people is just a little less than 1 Elephantpower

[–]BunsTown 2 points3 points ago

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I fly almost exclusively, with midget powered flights. A lot of people will fly this way and never even know it. After you enter your mileage reward points the letters MPFlt will show next to the flight number.

[–]kushman 2 points3 points ago

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Dwarfpower should be the new measurement for power output.

[–]abakedapplepie 2 points3 points ago

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shorty in the sunglasses is slackin

[–]struan 2 points3 points ago

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On a similar theme

[–]The_blue_shark 2 points3 points ago

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This is how i feel trying to take down SOPA

[–]Petrazena 2 points3 points ago

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On Sneezy! On Grumpy! On Dopey! On Doc! On Sleepy! On Happy! On Bashful! On Shorty! On Stumpy! On Ewok! Let's deliver these presents!

[–]DTG09 2 points3 points ago

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http://i.imgur.com/Ifj9a.jpg

[–]Misanthropic_Owl 4 points5 points ago

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And it's clean, renewable energy!

[–]Kertelen 2 points3 points ago

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I'm going straight to hell for laughing at this.

[–]darwin_wins 1 point2 points ago

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I am not sure if we can call it renewable. I mean how many do you find at any given point, unless of course if you are saying you are machine that produces these in lots.

[–]Kleptis 3 points4 points ago

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looks like it will be a short trip

[–]infinitemonkeyrage 1 point2 points ago

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midgetpunk airplane taxi?

[–]Thorus 1 point2 points ago

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I even see a young Ozzy Osbourne!

[–]captainmiggles 1 point2 points ago

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Is this for Con Air 2?

[–]THMJ 1 point2 points ago

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At first I wondered why no one was commenting on the fucking giant in the middle of the picture. Then it clicked.

[–]philthespartan 1 point2 points ago

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Midget Oprah. (4th person 2nd row)

[–]sprankton 2 points3 points ago

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Midget Mitch Hedberg.(2nd person 1st row)

[–]RacialSlurPoster 1 point2 points ago

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The niglet on the left is really getting into this shit

[–]Ryanami 1 point2 points ago

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They're wearing red, white, and blue. AMEEERRRRICA, FUCK YEAH!!

[–]alandar1 1 point2 points ago

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It gets better.

[–]oed706 1 point2 points ago

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The conversion from normal-to-midget for Ozzy Ozburne went quite well.

[–]monkey_d_luffy 1 point2 points ago

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Mid-jet Airlines?

[–]PapaGoulash 1 point2 points ago

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It's nice that they let Chris Farley and Chuck Norris lead the reds.

[–]squeaki 1 point2 points ago

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Elves... Santa... flying? There's joke in there somewhere. I"ll carry on drinking.

[–]jamthefourth 1 point2 points ago

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Reminds me of 40 level-1 gnomes taking on Hogger.

[–]mistermog 1 point2 points ago

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YSK: a group of midgets and/or dwarves is called a "toss."

[–]TosserHUH 1 point2 points ago

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Imagine the guy who had to call and order the harness...

[–]hoolegr 1 point2 points ago

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That show gave me a fear of midgets/dwarves. Strong blighters.

[–]climbinladders 1 point2 points ago

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DoublYOU TEE EFFFF

[–]Sarah_Connor 1 point2 points ago

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Looks like they are having a little fun!

No shortage of smiles in this picture.

These guys should stand tall if they manage to pull that plane even on tiny inch.

[–]paidvacation 1 point2 points ago

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Seems like Santa operates in a bit more unethical ways than previously thought..

[–]fgcpoo 1 point2 points ago

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So thats how santa does it..

[–]youshallnotpass1234 1 point2 points ago

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So THAT'S how planes work....

[–]dkaz46 1 point2 points ago

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Santa's Reindeers look different this year

[–]AmishRockstar 1 point2 points ago

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MunchkinAir unveils it's latest cost cutting measure.

[–]Shup 1 point2 points ago

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Find the niglet!

[–]MSTR_CTRL 1 point2 points ago

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Something seems terribly offensive about this, but I just can't put my finger on it...

[–]GreatScott308 1 point2 points ago

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Caption nailed it!

[–]jokubolakis 1 point2 points ago

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This is not funny

[–]xiipaoc 1 point2 points ago

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Man, it would be so hilarious if they zoomed out and pulling the other plane was... AN ELEPHANT!

[–]EternalMintCondition 1 point2 points ago

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Is what happens when the plane tries to take off.

[–]th3m0ntana 1 point2 points ago

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On Dancer and Prancer and Donner and Vixen!

[–]daehanmeanboo 1 point2 points ago

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I wonder if midgets get the majority of their work during the holiday season as elves on commercials/at malls.

[–]rebelpride 1 point2 points ago

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Its like Bee Movie

[–]athos45678 1 point2 points ago

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reindeer are supposed to pull things, not the little elves!

[–]bordemseeks 1 point2 points ago

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it was early 2000 decade reality show on fox

[–]onbin 1 point2 points ago

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I spy an example of the rare and elusive Asian dwarf!

[–]brilliantNumberOne 1 point2 points ago

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They'll never get up to 88 that way.

[–]fatchmoreboogie 1 point2 points ago

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One of them looks like a miniature Geddy Lee. Awesome.

[–]loluguys 1 point2 points ago

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:D

[–]angrybane 1 point2 points ago

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Preferred nomenclature is little people!

[–]screenshotted 1 point2 points ago

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This isn't the guys who built the railroads here.

[–]dekosser 1 point2 points ago

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In other news, airlines are downsizing their workforce.

[–]DoctorArtist 1 point2 points ago

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Don't know if this has been pointed out already, but the one on the front left looks like Chuck Norris.

[–]TheJerseyDevilX 1 point2 points ago

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I laughed much harder than I should have at this.

[–]jamesonbar 1 point2 points ago

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The man show midget is up in front leading the way.

[–]imnotbono 1 point2 points ago

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Is that Mini Ozzy Osbourne?

[–]saffer001 1 point2 points ago

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Look they even have little harnesses!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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so much fivehead.

[–]dekayge 1 point2 points ago

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This is WTF worthy.

[–]sotech 1 point2 points ago

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Those are simply adorable little carbon footprints.

[–]DrKilory 1 point2 points ago

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I totally saw this earlier today and could have sworn those weren't midgets before.

[–]Wavemanns 1 point2 points ago

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Little help here?

[–]derpinita 1 point2 points ago

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you know what would be even better? A whole flock of people with cerebral palsy trying to pull an airplane. YES!

[–]TheMightyMush 1 point2 points ago

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Was this Mush, perhaps, mighty?

[–]brokenblender 1 point2 points ago

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why....OMFG...why?

[–]VonHeinrich 1 point2 points ago

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SO that is how that works. I thought the little men were IN the engines...

[–]alexsandlor 1 point2 points ago

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i think they can made the plane to become fly in the sky ..........?

[–]sounds84 1 point2 points ago

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a little man power goes a long way

[–]revolversoul93 2 points3 points ago

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So...wrong...but..so...right

[–]tomasgdvl 0 points1 point ago

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Where is Snooki? She belongs there!

[–]Roaning 1 point2 points ago

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They're not putting in mush effort.

[–]DerpJohnson 0 points1 point ago

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Mitch Hedberg as a midget?

[–]moosemanca 0 points1 point ago

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We should stop measuring cars in Horsepower and start measuring in Midget power.

[–]JesteroftheApocalps 0 points1 point ago

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This was a TV show back in 2000 called, "Australian Wet Dream"

[–]ManEatingCow -3 points-2 points ago

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It's funny for those of you who don't have a family member that is a dwarf.

[–]Mr-Personality 7 points8 points ago

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I hate to explain humor but...

What's funny isn't that they're short. It's that some producer thought having 50 short people pull an airplane in a race against an elephant should be a thing.

[–]derpinita 1 point2 points ago

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Ehhhh I think you're giving people a touch too much credit here.

It's like the white people who laughed at Dave Chapelle because they were laughing at racism vs. the whiteys who laughed because they liked racism.

[–]lordeddardstark 1 point2 points ago

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Shut up, Jaime.

[–]Perryn 2 points3 points ago

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I don't know if that's meant to imply that it's not funny for those who do, but you did not specifically rule it out.

[–]darwin_wins 0 points1 point ago

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So is it okay to assume that you laugh when you see non-dwarf people doing the same thing?

[–]Porn_thats_Relevant -1 points0 points ago

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I just went through 12 pages of midget porn just to find this

[–]MrAsymo 4 points5 points ago

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..I think you're trying to take relevant_rule34's job!

AND I DON'T APPROVE!

[–]Porn_thats_Relevant 0 points1 point ago

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Actually Relevantrule34 inspired me to make a novelty account, but I couldn't think of anything to put as a novelty account. My life sucks. ಠ\ಠ

[–]fett4evr -1 points0 points ago

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am i the only one creeped out by this

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