this post was submitted on
57 points (86% like it)
68 up votes 11 down votes

funny

subscribe2,456,794 readers

7,598 users here now

PLEASE, No posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.


Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress.

  • Rage comics - Go to /fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).


Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.


If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators


The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.


CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

all 8 comments

[–]NotSelfReferential 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

In this situation, the only correct response is to say "Cutting your hair won't do anything about you being so fat," and then laugh in a playful, joking way.

[–]anotherevil 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Heard you got a new couch. Time to test out how comfortable it is.

[–]NotSelfReferential 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The trick is the playful part. And also "if I really thought you were fat I wouldn't joke about it!"

[–]anotherevil 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

By god, that might actually work.

/takes notes in little notebook.

Go on Sensei, teach me your ways.

[–]skierdude1188 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

"WHY DON'T YOU JUST DATE A GIRL WITH SHORT HAIR SINCE YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH"

[–]sgst 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Correct response is to say "you look beautiful either way" and then smile gingerly, waiting to see if it worked

[–]Gelidus 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

My response to these questions: "I have no opinion"

[–]mykalepaul 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

i found it really hard to concentrate with all those damn black dots appearing and disappearing