this post was submitted on
624 points (62% like it)
1,610 up votes 986 down votes

funny

subscribe2,364,129 readers

16,636 users here now

PLEASE, No posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.


Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress.

  • Rage comics - Go to /fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).


Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.


If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators


The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.


CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

all 49 comments

[–]xxdarkstarxx 6 points7 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Whenever I return from a deployment I feel like time has stopped for me but for everyone else its kept going. =(

[–]photo238[S] 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Yeah I know the feeling!

[–]genesai 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]e4excellence 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Came here to post this.

[–]GhostedAccount 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Is it a result of Obama pulling troops out of iraq? Or just the end of a normal tour of duty?

[–]drmzbig 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Carlton rocks!! Happy Holidays to you and your loved ones. Thank you for your service.

[–]photo238[S] -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Thank you! You too!

[–]GodOfThunder44 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Which branch? Deployed to the middle east I take it? I'm stationed in Japan, definitely gonna miss christmas with my family this year.

[–]fastlikeninja 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

We are stationed in Japan also and will miss the holidays with family for the next 3 years. OP thanks for your service :)

[–]crowseidon 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

My best friend did this last year when he was in Afganistan, we're both in the service but not stationed together. Thought I'd share as it always cheers me up.

[–]Dominant_Peanut 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

11 days? Careful you don't jinx it. Seriously though, get home safe.

[–]smiledawg 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I want to freaking hug you.

Thank you for serving. ; u;

[–]loercase 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Shit son, I haven't been home for Christmas in six years. I feel for you though - enjoy it, eat well, and try to honestly enjoy the company of people who really care for you without asking anything. Make sure to help out so you don't fight with your parents, and play with your siblings, cousins, nephews, nieces, etc. Enjoy the season for what it is.

[–]sheerblue15 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I'm sure your family is dancing too. I know I did when my husband came home from deployments. Thank you for serving!

[–]Raelah 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I would do the same thing! Thank you for your service and dedication! I hope you and your family have a very merry Christmas! =)

[–]MelisSassenach 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I just wanted to say I'm so happy for you and I'm sending a ton of Christmas cheer your way (by singing. loudly, and off-key). I hope you have a wonderful holiday and thank you so much for your service.

[–]lostboyz 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Before I clicked, I was thinking "please be carlton, please be carlton"

Did not disappoint, would click again A+++++

[–]riverbottom 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Have a safe trip home man!

[–]damnit_blondemoment 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You are absolutely wonderful, and I thank you.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Hey man, thanks for serving our country and enjoy your time at home!

[–]idrawsblanks 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Same story here bro, hope you enjoy your christmas.

[–]-H0B0- 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Thank you.

[–]peoriabigred 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Thanks goes to you and your friends being real heros!!!!Get back safe!!!!!

[–]CutterJohn 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

We always did half christmas leave, half new years. I always tried to get christmas so I could sell it to one of the guys who got new years. :D

Christmas duty was easy duty, and it gave me an excuse to not go through the 7 separate chistmas parties I had to go to on christmas day to fulfill family obligations.

[–]joey_epictoke 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Be safe out there! Still have 11 more days!

[–]drivefastallday 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Have an awesome holiday season this year. Thanks for your service and for being a bamf

[–]So_Full_Of_Fail 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Hopefully your redeployment/reintegration is done by Christmas.

[–]Undead_outlaw 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I'm very happy for you and your family. Thank you and your family for all you do. Merry christmas :)

[–]theregularlion 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Congratulations. Hope your last 11 days are uneventful and you come home safe. Happy holidays.

[–]evil_steve 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Cue the Tom Jones music!

[–]coolcrowe 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Congrats! I just separated from the military this year... haven't been home in almost 2 years, and looks like I won't be able to visit anytime soon. I wish I were in your shoes. So... enjoy it! lol

[–]GD0512 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Good for you, and thanks for your service!

[–]xHaZxMaTx 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

My best friend who is in the Navy will be home in 5 days; it'll be his first time home for Christmas since he joined over 3 years ago. Your friends and family are doing the same thing. :)

[–]RossTheColonel -2 points-1 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Dude you can get court martialed for telling people when you are coming home because movement of troops is classified info until it has happened. Just a warning, I don't know if your info is public, just thought I'd say it only because a friend of mine was deranked for telling us when he was coming home on facebook.

[–]No-Coast-Punk 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

False.

OPSEC violations involve information that gives away specifics. Like, if this guy said "Hai guyz! I'm currently in Al-Anbar stationed with the 1337'th infantry brigade and will be leaving at 7:30 in the morning in a Convoy headed towards your moms house." This guy could be stationed in godamn Iceland for all we know.

[–]GhostedAccount 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]korahlee -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Thank you for your services to the country. Merry Christmas to you and your family. God bless.

[–]imgur-mirror-bot -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]Zcarp -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Thank you for your service. Hope you have a great Christmas. I find it hard to understand coming home after leaving the country to go to war. I would be terrified to leave. You are a stronger person then I am. Be safe.

[–]RevWaldo -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Good thing they rescinded DADT. :-)

Get home safe!

[–]MIDNIGHTZOMBIE -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I'm glad that they let gays in the military now.

[–]jakemyers7 -3 points-2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

no one wanted you back though

[–]thestimp -2 points-1 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Have fun battle, dont blow all that deployment money ;)

[–]Nomakeme -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Now if only you had a sweater that sharp!

[–]o0banky0o -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

If your deployment was anything like mine, which is like most, you'll feel very excited at first, then it'll be considerably hostile as you attempt to behave the way you have for the last year, which is to treat everyone else with extended subconscious interactions ( eating every meal, doing laundry, daily scheduled bathroom excursions, etc) that happen without thought, and it'll fall apart. NO ONE ELSE will want to do any of it with you. Be prepared to design new behaviors for every second of the day, including sleep.

[–]CyborgCraig -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I leave in Feb for BMT. Much like you, I will be gone for the better part of the year (9-10 months). I must say though, I'm not sure the Carlton dance really does it justice as to how excited you must be to come home. Good luck to you sir, and thank you!

[–]foolsmagools -3 points-2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

sooo you're a fagit then right? im still in the womb sorry to bother

[–]Eivindtm -3 points-2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Something for /r/spacedicks