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WTF

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all 106 comments

[–]Yirthos_Gix 160 points161 points ago*

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I hate you sir. I somehow navigated the internet for the last 10 years never seeing that infamous anus. Today you have ruined that for me. I can never again claim to be an unsullied non-viewer.... I hope you're happy now that you have destroyed that for me....I hope you're happy sir!

-Edit for grammar-

[–]HavocWeaver 38 points39 points ago

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Oh come now, take it like a champ and wash it down with some eyebleach.

[–]Energiez 21 points22 points ago

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That seems like it belongs in the Redditor's Handbook

[–]elustran 16 points17 points ago

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Won't that just make people associate kittens with a man's distended anus?

[–]HavocWeaver 25 points26 points ago

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NOW it will. Way to go man. ಠ_ಠ

[–]elustran 7 points8 points ago

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Hey, I bet one or two might even fit in!

[–]HavocWeaver 3 points4 points ago

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Three even!

[–]Vaknor 2 points3 points ago

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ಠ,_ಠ,

There, my terrible attempt at crying disapproval smiley.

[–]w4rfr05t 20 points21 points ago

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ಥ_ಥ

[–]ConfidentiallyFamous 2 points3 points ago

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I looked at every picture and didn't see natalie portman once, WTF!?

[–]skakruk 3 points4 points ago

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may I ask sir, what is that link? Sorry for my pussyness, I just got semi-goatseed for the first time, I'm sensible.

[–]HavocWeaver 12 points13 points ago

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Ah, well I appreciate your politesse and shall respond with some of my own!

You see my good man, quite often on /r/wtf OR /r/spacedicks (<- /r/wtf on steroids, don't go there unless you're pretty much desensitized. seriously. that shit will fuck you up.) You'll occasionally see things that will kind of... stick with you. Like goatse for example. Kidbleach.com is a SFW website that provides you with pictures of happy things. Fluffy kittens, a happy little tree-frog, a puppy kissing a kitten, more fluffy kittens, a happy little puppy chasing a ball, MOAR KITTENS.

TL;DR: Its a SFW website that hosts a slideshow of happy pictures of fluffy kittens and adorable things, providing a sort of antidote to the fucked up shit you're GONNA see on the internet.

[–]HavocWeaver 15 points16 points ago

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For the NSFW site, that has titties and happy girls washing cars, you'll want Eyebleach.com

[–]skakruk 2 points3 points ago

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Thanks, kind sir!

[–]HavocWeaver 0 points1 point ago

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Anytime chap!

[–]skakruk 14 points15 points ago

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I share your feelings, fellow brother. I was another joyful "Goatse" virgin. I had only read descriptions about it. Now, I watched this and inmediatly the worst nightmares became reality, I SAW GOATSE.

Thanks God it's just a fake image, and it's not shocking, the bad thing is that you can kind of imagine how the real is, I hope to forget this image soon.

You OP, are an asshole :(

[–]HavocWeaver 8 points9 points ago

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http://www.lolshock.com/ heres a nice list of sites to avoid my friend, take heed, whatever you do. do. not. ever. watch 3 guys 1 hammer.

heres a description to satisfy your curiosity, warning graphic detail. but videoless and photoless

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dnepropetrovsk_maniacs

You can pretty much look up the description of any of those videos, at your own risk of course.

[–]Eeveelutions 5 points6 points ago

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Holy shit, even reading the Wikipedia description makes me need eye-bleach.

Imagine being the jury for that trial :/ or a lawyer or the judge, or the family of a victim, or the VICTIM. Fuck that. Fuck that with something big and pointy.

-quits law school-

[–]deF291 4 points5 points ago

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Viktor Sayenko was represented in court by his father Igor Sayenko, a lawyer.[24]

[–]fistea 2 points3 points ago

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U need brain bleach for that shit.

[–]BigLuckyDavy 4 points5 points ago

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You

[–]MyOverflow 1 point2 points ago

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You say photoless, but the first one on the right is one of their cat hanging photos.

[–]HavocWeaver 0 points1 point ago

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Oh crap D: actually didn't see that. That's totally my bad guys. Apologies all around.

[–]Rabble_Arouser 1 point2 points ago

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Is the video of them murdering the cat, or murdering Sergei Yatzenko? Or is it something else?

[–]emives1 2 points3 points ago

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The man.

[–]Rabble_Arouser 1 point2 points ago

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Thanks for the heads up. My life will be perfectly fine with never viewing that video.

[–]HavocWeaver 0 points1 point ago

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I've never personally seen it, its just a level of fucked up i'm not gonna allow myself to tread. /r/spacedicks isn't a problem for me at all.

Actually watching a video like that is something else all together.

[–]cockwaffle 16 points17 points ago

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I have a whole novelty account about goatse, once you get over it you'll discover it's a lot more fun to be that guy who shows it to everyone.

I have a particular interest in moral philosophy and like to use goatse to illustrate the arbitrary nature of much of human ethical judgement. As it seems, the grammar of human morality follows from mere disgust more often than not, and nothing brings this out quite like goatse.

[–]nuwbs 3 points4 points ago

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That's deep dude...

[–]familyorfriends 1 point2 points ago

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What do you mean by "arbitrary"?

Whenever I see people take your views, or say what I think you're saying, they're usually trying to substitute the current arbitrary morality with some other arbitrary morality that suits them better.

[–]BigLuckyDavy 2 points3 points ago

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Are you actually goatse? The dick that likes to pretend it's relevant when it's actually goatse? Because really, that's messed up. It's like the guy who put arsenic in tylenol when he got laid off. That's hardly morally arbitrary.

[–]The_Swagmaster 5 points6 points ago

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Holy shit you must be like a smart person or something???

[–]iwannaiguana 1 point2 points ago

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All of this coming from a guy who's username is cockwaffle

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points ago

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I just want to let you know that you've been linked to by reddit's upvote brigade, r/SRS. They say your comment is so awful that they wish to bump it higher up the page so that more people may see and appreciate your handiwork. No affiliations.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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NOW I DON'T KNOW WHO TO BELIEVE

[–]bornagainredditor 2 points3 points ago

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It's funny, since the internet came around, I've seen way to many other guy's anuses.

[–]Baka-san 2 points3 points ago

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I've never seen it either and I wasn't able to recognize this picture as goatse when suddenly.. ZING Scumbag Brain:" DUDE THAT'S GOATSE!" And I'm like "NO WAY!".. yeah..

[–]BigLuckyDavy 2 points3 points ago

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Seriously. I too have never seen the fabled anus of goatse. Today, I feel I have lost a terrible loss. The battle is lost and the war has sadly come to an end today.

There is but one hope. Lemon Party has yet to burn upon my retina. I don't even know what Lemon Party is about. I'd like to keep it that way.

[–]hypmoden 1 point2 points ago

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I think it's been about 10 years since I've seen that image

[–]Battlesheep 1 point2 points ago

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Me too. Funny thing is, after years of squirming from descriptions and ASCII art, the actual thing wasn't that bad

[–]kellyrosetta 1 point2 points ago

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-golf clap-

[–]Vaknor -1 points0 points ago

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You spelt you're wrong twice, FIX IT ಠ_ಠ

[–]BigLuckyDavy 2 points3 points ago

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The reddiquette was changed and correcting people's grammar is now acceptable. However, it says to do so politely. You'll accumulate less downvotes by being polite.

[–]Vaknor 0 points1 point ago

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OCD ಠ_ಠ

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Did anyone else try to rhyme "infamous anus"? Like , in-FAME-us ANE-us?

[–]Jzkqm 20 points21 points ago

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"Oh hey, this is that one stunt guy's demo reel, how is this NSF- OH GOD JESUS WHY"

[–]spinozasrobot 1 point2 points ago

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It sure does look like Damien Walters.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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I believe it is. Only he can make the rest of the human race look bad in such a stylish manner.

[–]spinozasrobot 0 points1 point ago

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I always figured it was an X-Men thing... his special power was anti-gravity.

[–]publiclibraries 19 points20 points ago

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What I find more interesting is that someone had to look at goatse long enough to edit it into the gif.

[–]WildKittyv1 17 points18 points ago

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I doubt the creator cared to begin with. After seeing the same shit long enough it just doesn't bother you anymore, man.

[–]devophill 28 points29 points ago

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At first you don't even notice his wedding ring.

[–]criscokkat 69 points70 points ago

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[–]thisisnotthought 13 points14 points ago

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I hope this shrapnel of information survives long enough to become a part of some religious text some day.

[–]biga29 5 points6 points ago

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"GUYS! We discovered ancient "2D video shootage" of the creation of our ancestors!"

[–]wdejr 14 points15 points ago

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YES YES. Whatever you're doing keep doing it. yous gonna go far, kid.

[–]bobablo 1 point2 points ago

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this is how people should have been awakened in the matrix.

[–]2akurate 0 points1 point ago

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now make the guy look like a turd.

[–]ambiturnal 4 points5 points ago

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That's rough. All I had to do was click 'Subscribe'.

[–]tanepiper 3 points4 points ago

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I fucking LOLed

[–]wdejr 6 points7 points ago

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HAHAHAHAHA never laughed at picture before, until now!

[–]Panda412 2 points3 points ago

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Bravo

[–]bpoag 2 points3 points ago

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Needs to be played in reverse.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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make it go backwards!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Shopped! I can tell by the sphincter.

[–]BrianAllred 1 point2 points ago

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Welp, I've finally seen the third picture of the WTF trifecta. Surprised it took me so many years, honestly.

[–]BigLuckyDavy 1 point2 points ago

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Trifecta? It's more like the 10 wonders of the internet now.

Tub girl, lemon party, goatse, two girls one cup, 3 guys 1 hammer.... I mean, that's just the primer.

[–]kungtotte 2 points3 points ago

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Am I the only one who doesn't think lemon party belongs on that list? I mean seriously, three wrinkly old guys kissing and sucking each other off does not compare to a hobo being tortured to death or a man's anus being so distended that you could use it for skee-ball.

Shit man, lemon party is like just another day on the internets.

[–]BigLuckyDavy 1 point2 points ago

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Fucking didn't have to describe it. It was my one ounce of peace. Upvoted anyways.

[–]admvb 1 point2 points ago

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"Hm, this seems to be rather norm....oh fuck you"

[–]nosebleedlouie 1 point2 points ago

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Fake

[–]coronado86 1 point2 points ago

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For all my life I have been avoiding to see that image, and now you!!!! I HATE YOU!!!!!!!! but I upvote you sir

[–]zombicidalscientist 1 point2 points ago

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It's been a while since I've seen that. Nice job OP, I still managed to cringe a little after almost a decade of having that tucked somewhere in my grain.

[–]Journalisto 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Very_Blunt 1 point2 points ago

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Its funny that the whole time I was cringing because I expected the man to break his back or experience something gruesome. I've never been more alleviated to see Goatsee in my life....

[–]theNAMEis 1 point2 points ago

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lol at all the /r/wtf users.. you havent wtf'd in your life. /r/spacedicks

[–]gregdbowen 1 point2 points ago

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wait, what? no... How the.. what type of... where in the ...

wow.

[–]YouWithTheFace 1 point2 points ago

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how can this be so hilarious?

[–]Lobster_clause 1 point2 points ago

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where is the same gif but backwards. I want to see him cartwheel flying out of an ass.

[–]dnrchy1 1 point2 points ago

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Can i see this .gif reversed?

[–]redgreenandblue 1 point2 points ago

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that right there... that's some high quality internet, that is.

[–]t3hkl0wn 1 point2 points ago

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It's just that gymna-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[–]colonel_angus74740 2 points3 points ago

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NSFL

[–]GiggleNinja 4 points5 points ago

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ಠ_ಠ

[–]quadatomic 4 points5 points ago

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[–]Capmnobody[!] 1 point2 points ago

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It's a Goat! See!

[–]KoyaHusky 0 points1 point ago

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Kinda mario triple jumped in myself..

[–]panicbomb44 0 points1 point ago

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Have you ever heard of r/Spacedicks?

[–]CatInBubbles 2 points3 points ago

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Why did I click that?

[–]cptspas 0 points1 point ago

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He is on r/spacedicks in class all the time. Pisses the teacher right off.

[–]jackdrastic 0 points1 point ago

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beecock.

[–]Norbury9395 0 points1 point ago

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im going to a wedding tomorrow and Damien Walters (the guy in the gif) is going to be there and this is all I'm going to be thinking when I see him now, Thanks Reddit

[–]guntfuddler 0 points1 point ago

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Huh? I um... Click on it.

[–]Youthsonic 0 points1 point ago

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Dammit; Can't I go anywhere on the internet WITHOUT seeing goatse?

[–]Jimmy_Big_Nuts 0 points1 point ago

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Make that a big pussy, and I am NEXT!

[–]dumpweed1 0 points1 point ago

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watch this closely this isn't real.

[–]ThunderNuggets358 0 points1 point ago

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you should never go ass to whole person

[–]hennakin 0 points1 point ago

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Thanx /r/WTF ! This made my day !! :-)

[–]Hr0n 0 points1 point ago

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"Shlurp!"

[–]LerithXanatos -1 points0 points ago

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Good shit.

[–]hiebarooni -1 points0 points ago

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Ultimate goatse.

[–]goddamnferret -5 points-4 points ago

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These "How I feel about" pictures/gifs need to get the hell out of WTF. I hate them with a passion. People stumble across a random GIF, post it with a stupid title, and it reaches the top no matter how stupid it is.

[–]Qwuffl 1 point2 points ago

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sees gif on reddit

posts gif to another subreddit

title is "how i felt when X happened"

tons of karma

???

profit

mfw i attempted to greentext

mfw i have no face