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top 200 commentsshow all 448

[–]MockOutrage 175 points176 points ago

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Fort Kickass has no king, Fort Kickass needs no king.

[–]honey_I_shot_the_kid 80 points81 points ago

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Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.

[–]UsernameFanfic 244 points245 points ago*

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After the explosion settled, he staggered back several paces, his eyes widening. Try as he might, he couldn't look away from the patch of blackened dust that used to be his fourteen-year-old daughter.

The ray gun sputtered unhelpfully.

"Fuck."

Upstairs, the doorway squealed open and keys jangled onto a coffee table. "Honey, I'm back early!" came his wife's voice. "The meeting went quicker than expected."

"Fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck."

"Honey? You home?"

"FUCK."

[–]Passive_Observer 57 points58 points ago

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Oh, I like you.

[–]ElCaz 8 points9 points ago

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Not very passive of you, commenting and all.

[–]Passive_Observer 4 points5 points ago

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We all have our contradictions in life.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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you contain multitudes.

[–]Passive_Observer 2 points3 points ago

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Well, here, have another.

[–]orbat 8 points9 points ago*

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Hello new favorite person on reddit.

Edit: read your other comments. Damn, you're talented

[–]honey_I_shot_the_kid 31 points32 points ago

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[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]passing_interest 8 points9 points ago

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I see the snark machine is still running at capacity.

[–]zyzzogeton 9 points10 points ago

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We are at about 0.8 Joan Rivers right now. Reddit can run a full 1.7 JR's when it gets going at full capacity.

[–]orange_kevin 4 points5 points ago

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First time seeing that .gif - I'm in stitches.

[–]Tee_Red 4 points5 points ago

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Hmmm... your name intrigues me greatly, use it well young user.

[–]voidconsumer 3 points4 points ago

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Oh very nice. This could well be the best novelty account I've seen yet.

[–]doctordumbass 2 points3 points ago

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New favorite redditor. Dibs. He/she has only been here an hour. Dibs.

[–]psiondoodler 1 point2 points ago

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I read this at least three times wondering what he was quoting before it hit me. It is entirely too early/late.

[–]Bucky_Ohare 1 point2 points ago

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... Keep this up, and you might be one of the best novelty accounts Reddit has ever seen.

[–]Rage_Comic_Guy 12 points13 points ago

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can some one please explain to me what an RA is, and whats stopping me from removing his teeth with my knuckle?

[–]IsaakCole 27 points28 points ago*

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It stands for Resident Assistant. We're ourselves students who live in the residence halls, however we're supposed to enforce the rules, create programming for residents, put up bulletin boards, do general monkey work around the residence center and act as a resource for our residents. In return, the university (in my case at least) pays for my housing, meal plan and gives me a little extra cash to boot each month.

Most RA's take their positions very seriously and work hard to create diversity and community building programming, act as role-models for residents, and uphold the rules to the dot so as to maintain university policy and to maintain the respect of their residents.

Then there are RAs like me, who create programs based on the interests of the residents but decide to screw the pointless diversity part, let them get away with hallway sports, and laugh in the face of most of the rules. Particularly ones pertaining to alcohol. Because honestly, if they're not destroying university property or themselves, I don't think they need a babysitter. Except if the little bastards are smoking or being downright irresponsible. Then I have actually be responsible.

[–]DJ_Don_Quixote 8 points9 points ago

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Because honestly, if they're not destroying university property or themselves, I don't think they need a babysitter.

I'm an RA too and this is how I feel about my residents.

[–]Hoobleton 2 points3 points ago

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Is there any incentive not to just kick back like you do and not follow the rules to the letter? If you were caught not being a hardass would you lose the position?

I just don't get why anyone would take that position seriously and not let college kids have their fun.

[–]illbevictorious 5 points6 points ago

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A lot of times, it's just someone who can solve roommate issues, act as a mediator, pass out and collect forms that need to be filled out by the resident, and they're just an extra set of eyes within the residents halls. I'm one, too, and there is a line between having fun and being disruptive, especially at 2am. Nothing wrong with having fun, but there are other people living in the dorms, too.

[–]SantiagoRamon 1 point2 points ago

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You forgot dispense free condoms.

[–]hofodomo 2 points3 points ago

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We have the Condom Tsar for that duty.

[–]Kaluthir 1 point2 points ago

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I googled "czar"...

[–]ButtonJoe 4 points5 points ago

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My roomate was an RA a while back. He was required to run a couple socials on specific topics like a heart healthy social to promote health or something that talked about how important sleep was. He was also supposed to get people who came to sign a sheet so that they could track that he was doing his job, and they kept track of how many people actually came. If very few people or nobody showed up, then those in charge of the hall would yell at him. The main motivation is to keep the people in charge happy so that you can retain the position next year. Plus there are multiple RA's on each floor, so if one isnt willing to talk to people about the stupid stuff they're doing, another likely will.

[–]IsaakCole 2 points3 points ago

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Depending on what I get caught letting them do, I could either be reprimanded or not called back next year, and unfortunately it's a job I need to help pay part of my tuition. My parents aren't in the hole monetarily, but it's not fair that they pay it all.

However, I've found it far easier to command their respect, create programming they all enjoy, actually build a sense of community, and get them to follow rules if I'm lax with them. I let them play a little hallway put-put sometimes and in return they're open with me, and they follow rules sometimes just to help me out and make my job easier. They're not going out of their way to do stupid shit behind my back.

Their is an incentive to take it seriously if you want to look good in front of your superior and if you want to make sure they don't go wild, vomiting everywhere and tearing shit down. Lucky for me I'm a decent bullshitter and my residents are respectful of each other and community property. I've had to tell one or two jackasses off for doing stupid, rude shit. But for the most part they take care of the floor and will tell their neighbor if they need to tone it down.

As an example, I had to hang up an anti-marijuana poster. One of them tore it down and replaced it with pro-legalization info. I told them in an email they couldn't do that and I ended up getting an apology with no hassle.

Other RAs are much stricter and I've found as a result their residents aren't as close to them.

[–]DrKuha 1 point2 points ago

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I had a friend who was an RA. He actually had a liquor cabinet in his room and sold drinks to residents. True story.

[–]zacharymichael 1 point2 points ago

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the diversity part isn't pointless.

  • an RA who doesn't care a ton, but knows what's important.

[–]IsaakCole 1 point2 points ago

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Well, perhaps I should say not as much emphasis should be placed on it. Where I work we're expected to put some sort of diversity component into EVERY program. If there's an issue pertaining to that in a residence hall, then I see it as necessary. But everyone gets a little sick of it after a while if it's in our faces all the time.

[–]garhent 2 points3 points ago

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I was a Resident Adviser for two years. At my University the only reason that we would have to tell someone to take down a poster would be if it was pornography or hate content and it was visible to everyone in the hallway and the kid kept his door open.

All the kid would have to do is to put the porn or hate on the wall that the door is on and no problem.

That being said, for the kid to be told to take his stuff down, it must have been some hellaciously offensive/wrong stuff. Most RA's don't care about what you do as long as you aren't impacting people outside of your own room.

[–]squarefan80 43 points44 points ago

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im curious as to what happened next. what reasons did he give for you to have to take them down? did you?

[–]AkimboGogurts[S] 50 points51 points ago

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Well, first i constructed a fort from boxes of files and then recited the magic phrase, needless to say, my walls are a lot less covered in cool things now.

[–]radraz26 35 points36 points ago

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I'm an RA at my university. It is a fire hazard.

[–]alijohnstone 173 points174 points ago

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The whole university's a fire hazard?

[–]radraz26 71 points72 points ago

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Yea, it causes problems.

[–]KnightAlbedo 10 points11 points ago

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As a former RA, I can back you up on this good sir. Although I will say that most posters I saw were fine as long as they weren't blocking vents/hanging from the sprinkler lines or the ceiling. Now posters on the front of the door is another thing all together...

[–]ChaoticEvil 64 points65 points ago

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I never understood this. Putting posters on a door is a fire hazard? The door is made of wood! My RA said that he was just following orders. So I compared his statement to those of men during the Nuremberg trials. Then he told me to shut up and take down my generic Fight Club poster.

RA: 1 ChaoticEvil: 0

[–]KnightAlbedo 12 points13 points ago

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Well according to my university, the door(s) are technically university space and therefore have more strict regulations as far as what content/material can be used on said door. The biggest thing I saw was dumbass kids using terrible tape that left a ton of adhesive on the door and often took away some of the door finish, a cost that is passed on to the student to pay for the door.

Also, depending on the content of any kind of flier in a dorm hall, the common policy is that it has to be O-Ked with the RA of the floor/community because I had a few incidents where it was inappropriate content involving solicitation and hate speech against other residents on the floor/Hall. Keep in mind that your RA has to deal with knowitall fucks all year, which I realize is part of the job, but that doesn't give anybody free reign to do whatever the hell they want. And for shits and giggles, I was compared to Hitler in one of the posters :D

[–]Banana223 10 points11 points ago

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When I lived in the dorms, my cross-dressing roommate waxed his legs, then stuck the resulting sheets of paper that had one side with hair embedded in wax, wax-side-down on the outside of another person's door to spell the word "fag". After everyone had their laugh, he tried to take them off. The wax and hair stayed behind, and then over the course of a year slowly migrated down the entire door. He eventually had to pay for a new door.

[–]greedo_posted_first 10 points11 points ago

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Wax on, wax never off

[–]Procris 3 points4 points ago

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solicitation and hate speech? damn.

[–]KnightAlbedo 3 points4 points ago

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lol they didn't mess around. I even had to call the cops on a kid three times within two months for inebriated provocation of other residents...ahh that was a long night.

[–]big-o-notation 5 points6 points ago

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So I compared his statement to those of men during the Nuremberg trials.

Godwin'd pretty fast there, didn't it?

[–]fauxnician 6 points7 points ago

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RA here. If it's any justification, it's not normal wood - it's supposed to be able to burn for a certain number of hours. As is the unappealing furniture, it's usually treated or meant to meet fire code. The paper on the door might expedite the burning of or create a weak point or something. Will it really happen or have an effect though? Probably not, but I imagine they say it for a reason other than not wanting people to put posters on things.

[–]ProjectAzar 5 points6 points ago

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Dude I live in a dorm that basically is built out of solid brick. It still has a 1950's CD Bomb Shelter Plate afixed to the bottom entry. We put Spiderman on the sealing and our housing people thought it was awesome. Then he ran out of webshooters and fell to the ground. So now he lives behind me.

[–]BreSput 1 point2 points ago

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viva le resistance!

[–]grubas 1 point2 points ago

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It varies, I had 5 posters, 2 of which were blacklight posters, with a black light on/near them, a strobe light, disco ball, and a giant tapestry over one entire wall. Yes, before you magically come to the conclusion, I do smoke weed, my friends did love my room, and my GF and I had an E fueled naked sex-rave, and it was MAGICAL. My university was draconian about a lot of laws, and I was never a bad resident(besides the fact that I was quite frequently drunk or high, but I was never loud, messy, obnoxious and my room smelled quite nice), and 3/4 of my RA's didn't care. For the one that did, I took down half the stuff, hid it in my closet, got the OK, and then anytime from then on that he had to inspect my room (only once) I'd just pull things down and put them back up again.

[–]Umpa 1 point2 points ago

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We had the opposite rule on posters for my majors building. They were ONLY to be placed on doors, because like you said they burn anyway.

[–]Electrifired 14 points15 points ago*

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Hey, I'm the fire and evacuation system technician in charge of the (edited for anonymity) Ask me about Fire hazards and how to smoke in your room.

[–]FastOCR33 25 points26 points ago

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I sell fire alarms and fire alarm accessories AMA

FTFY

[–]Electrifired 2 points3 points ago

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Nope, I sell nothing, just work on 'em.

[–]Offensive_Brute 1 point2 points ago

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put aluminum foil or plastic wrap around the sprinklerhead and fire alarm, and you could burn your fucking mattress without setting off an alarm. well, except the ones in the halls.

[–]Mine_is_nice 1 point2 points ago

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Hank Hill's brother?

[–]KnightAlbedo 9 points10 points ago

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Hell Yeah educate the childrens! Seriously though, I had about 4 incidents where some dumbass kid thought that he could smoke a bowl in his room without any kind of filters/towels/open windows and think that it wouldn't reek throughout the floor.

[–]Huntred 11 points12 points ago

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When I realized my freshman roommate was a stoner I covered the entire door edge with saran wrap, the frame and floor with a thin layer of Vaseline and then sealed the entire door perimeter with expansion foam before bed. Then trimmed the excess with a razor blade the next day.

Door closed like an airlock. Roommate and friends could have done hits in the dorm right next to the door and exhaled at it and nobody on the other side could legitimately claim that they ever smelled anything.

[–]Akama 3 points4 points ago

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good guy Greg.

What a great roommate.

[–]OH_YEAHHH 5 points6 points ago

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At first I thought you were joking, but now I think you actually did this.

What a guy!

[–]TheCrudMan 1 point2 points ago

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Do you know what an airlock is?

[–]Electrifired 8 points9 points ago

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Ok, so some basics. Two (main) types of alarms, Thermal and photoelectric (heat & smoke), If the detector in your room has a small, pointy little thing hanging inside a cage, it is a thermal, in which case you can hold a cypress hill concert in your room and be fine (look in your communal bathroom/toilet, these will almost certainly be thermal detectors), If it is a photoelectric (smoke) you can cover it with a glove or something and it will be fine, there is no anti-tamper devices on detectors. DO NOT TAKE THE DETECTOR OUT!!! This will alert the people in charge of the fire system and depending on the age of the system, it could even tell them exactly when and where a detector was removed, eg: your room. If it is an old system, it will give them a rough idea of where the detector was removed and they will find you if it is still removed during fault finding.

e: Forgot to mention, if you remove a detector on an old system, it will make every detector after yours (from the fire panel) useless, putting everyone else in danger. I personally found an RA with their detector removed in this exact situation, leaving everyone in their 6 story section without fire detection.

[–]Electrifired 4 points5 points ago

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Reeking throughout the floor is not my business, setting off the fire alarms is.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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He's not a very Friendly Neighboor.

[–]UCanWithUclan 1 point2 points ago

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Sock over fire alarm?

[–]Electrifired 1 point2 points ago

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Cling wrap is your best bet.

e: A rubber glove is better

[–]WolfDemon 3 points4 points ago

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Having lived in the dorms for a couple years....there were absolutely no regulations on putting posters up in our rooms...so all I have to say is WTF?

[–]KnightAlbedo 1 point2 points ago

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it is gonna depend on the how hardcore the university is about property damages and whether or not the students or the university has to foot the bill. Some colleges may just tack on a fee for damages throughout a dorm hall and call it whatever they want on the monthly statement. Or raise the rent prices.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Haha, my RA is pretty lenient then, because she let me and my roomate wrap our entire door in wrapping paper for Christmas decorating.
She's also performed some good deeds that are respected in the eyes of many an Ent, we are glad to have her.

[–]gettinrecognized 1 point2 points ago

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when I was an RA I had a resident who had christmas lights wrapped around the sprinkler pipes in his room. I walked in and was just like OH GOD NO D:

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]aspiringvoiceactor 1 point2 points ago

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So...live constrained out of fear of an extremely rare event?

[–]ic33 1 point2 points ago

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Part of the reason why fatal fires are very rare in dormitory/hotels/dense residences now (as opposed to, say, fifty years ago when they were more frequent events) is because we have constrained ourselves out of fear of these events, yes.

[–]aspiringvoiceactor 2 points3 points ago

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Data?

[–]lamprey187 4 points5 points ago

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He is on deck nine building a neutrino beacon.

[–]ProfSeverusSnape 1 point2 points ago

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Ok I'm done, time to go to bed. You sir or madam have won my "Made me Laugh out Loud" trophy today. Good Day.

[–]colonelmatto 16 points17 points ago

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you're a fire hazard.

[–]DoubleXX 6 points7 points ago

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No, you're a towel.

[–]theicecapsaremelting 2 points3 points ago

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It is a fire hazard in that you are risking being fired for making arbitrary and capricious demands on frivolous grounds!

[–]G1az3d 4 points5 points ago

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Aren't buildings fire hazards by nature?

[–]lostinfont 1 point2 points ago

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Oh God! I was an RA back in the day. And to this day "fire hazard" is the one thing that has stuck with me the longest. haha

[–]pics-or-didnt-happen 1 point2 points ago

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Ok, most ridiculous shit you've had to deal with as an RA... aaaaaand GO!

[–]uzi1080 1 point2 points ago

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You have my sympathies for having one of the most thankless jobs ever.

[–]esoterrorist 5 points6 points ago

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It is a fire code. You dont want a bunch of easily combustible materials on the walls. I think my college had a maximum of 70% coverage of the wall.

[–]Generic_NPC_Guy 60 points61 points ago

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Fort Kickass? Do you mind marking that on my map?

[–]Rswany 62 points63 points ago

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If you hit Whore Island you've gone too far.

[–]Assaultman67 26 points27 points ago

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Not unless that was your destination all along.

[–]NotJustAnyBeard 19 points20 points ago

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That's not....a real place.

[–]AndrewNeo 23 points24 points ago

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Sorry, I was just imagining Whore Island.

[–]feistyfish 4 points5 points ago

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unlike train island.

[–]Dresden89 2 points3 points ago

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Isle of Man... Is that like Whore Island for Women?

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points ago

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Is it because of the content of the posters or the quantity of the posters?

[–]ProfSeverusSnape 60 points61 points ago

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As a former RA I can answer that both are very legitimate reasons for making said poster take down their posters. Most colleges/universities have in their student/reslife code of conduct policies that prohibit the display of items that are banned as well. (bongs, drugs, alcohol are all examples), even though almost every douchebag student has a poster of Marley with a joint (and some non douchebags do too) and usually gets away with it. In my own experience (not to say its universal) this type of enforcement is only used if the RA has a problem with a student and just wants to add more policy violations onto somebody (I can see the pros and cons of this type of thinking but I digress). The quantity of posters the original poster has is a very serious violation that many do not seem to realize. Guidelines on the amount of wall space that can be covered, are there to protect both the students and the college/university in the event of a fire. Small rooms covered over 45% with highly flammable paper is a serious fire risk, that endangers everyone in the building. Don't know why I'm posting this long diatribe here, but I felt that if this gets to the front page via a hilarious connection to a reddit favorite show, then at least a small take on the issue from a former RA would be present. Thank you for your time, and I hope this comment was not an inconvenience for you.

[–]postama 10 points11 points ago

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I was an RA at my school, and we don't care about posters at all. Telling them about content is kind of violating their rights unless someone else feels threatened by the content (White supremacist posters, etc.). And paper does burn, but is a very quick burning fuel that will just go up and then nothing will happen, it wont start burning the wall or ceiling. This is why we forbid tapestries though, because there is a lot more content there.

Odd that some schools have this rule.

[–]glassFractals 52 points53 points ago

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I always find it insane how overcautious college residence life tends to be regarding fires.

I did a bunch of reading on fire safety to get a scholarship from a fire department or something. Yes, rooms can go up in flame astonishingly fast... but this is true whether there are posters or not. However, provided that the sprinkler system in the room is functional (and it probably is), those things will put that fire out of commission so damn fast it doesn't really matter much.

Most dorms are made out of very fire-resistent material anyways. People don't live in mortal terror of fires in normal houses, and despite all the toasters and power strip daisy-chaining and posters/wallpaper/fabrics, fires still don't happen very often. Yet normal residences are way less fire resistent, and do not have the commercial-level sprinkler systems that dorms do.

TL;DR: The fire paranoia is a load of bullocks; fires are rare and dorm buildings are more than equipped to survive them even if they happen. Let the damn kids have their bloody posters, toasters, and medusa lamps.

[–]Andernerd 20 points21 points ago

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On the one hand, my dorm appears to be made out of brick and cinder-block. On the other hand, we don't have a proper alarm system. In case of fire, our RA runs into the lobby and sets off a handheld siren. Our first fire drill it didn't work and he had to run about knocking on doors. Was both scary and hilarious.

[–]Tantric_Infix 2 points3 points ago

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Come fire alarm, or storm siren, or RA's knock, not one thing shall stop my counting flocks.

[–]Bognar 14 points15 points ago

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Counterpoint: Kids in college can make some stupid fucking decisions.

[–]chemobrain 12 points13 points ago

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Don't fuck with the fire code man, it's serious business. I guess it's been over 10 years now since the Boland Hall fire but that shit killed 3 kids and seriously injured a bunch more. Deaths aren't that frequent but there are thousands of college dorm fires a year (latest statistic I can find is 3,300 in 2005).

Read this (lengthy) and then tell me you still think RAs shouldn't worry about posters and toasters.

[–]mul4mbo 5 points6 points ago

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Dude in my brother's hall started a fire by drying out his wet shirt on a bare lightbulb. He turned it on and left.

[–]warboy 1 point2 points ago

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I just spent 5 minutes looking for the sprinkler system in my dorm. Conclusion is nope.

[–]GALACTICA-Actual 4 points5 points ago

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Tell that to the families of the students a Seton Hall University.

[–]lovemyfakeboobs 2 points3 points ago

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While they might be rare, think of the PR nightmare for the college if multiple students died in a dorm fire. Reward does not outweigh the benefit of taking the risk. Not by a long shot.

[–]Procris 2 points3 points ago

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The average person isn't an 18 year old away from home for the first time. Yet in many dorms, that -- or a slightly older average age of 19 -- IS the average person. We set a record in my freshman dorm for fire alarms. Sure, some of 'em were stupid things like someone who couldn't cook trying to make grilled cheese, some of them were stupid bored people at 4 am pulling alarms, but some of 'em were stupid bored people at 4 am doing things that could have caused massive smoke damage.

Edited to add: Just because the building could survive doesn't mean the residents would.

[–]ProfSeverusSnape 3 points4 points ago

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I agree that many colleges are very well equipped to handle most fires, the thing is its all a liability issue especially in the states where I always hear "my dad's a lawyer" (even if its BS). By having these fire codes in place, many mandated by law, it covers the colleges asses in case a fire does happen.

[–]esoterrorist 1 point2 points ago

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On an individual level, yes. But imagine 200 families suing your school at the same time. They have to do their due diligence. I think its mostly determined by the insurance company at that point... they dont think it might happen, but if it did it would end up terrible... which is why they buy insurance. In order to stay in compliance with said insurance, they must follow their recommendations

Just learn the fire inspection schedule and, as always, DONT FUCK UP

[–]-Emerica- 1 point2 points ago

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We're not allowed to have anything 6 inches from the ceiling (or hanging from the ceiling) because the sprinklers won't hit that.

[–]frattyfrattybrobro 0 points1 point ago

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I'll probably get a few downvotes for this, but you sound like an asshole.

[–]yankeesuck850 2 points3 points ago

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If RAs really do use them to tack on violations to students they're having trouble with, that's awful. What's the need to inequitably apply the rules? It becomes arbitrary. It can't be considered a rule in the first place if it isn't generally applied, so you can't expect them to expect its application and conform...totally not fair, and just kind of scummy.

[–]giandrea 2 points3 points ago

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Small rooms covered over 45% with highly flammable paper is a serious fire risk

My room is 100% covered in wall paper. It really doesn't seem to me very reasonable as an explanation.

[–]ProfSeverusSnape 2 points3 points ago

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I looked it up in my old handbook, it was 25%

Paper products should be fire retardant and decorations must be limited to no more than 25 percent of the wall space (including room door). ~old handbook of mine

[–]juaquin 2 points3 points ago

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You really think wallpaper is made from the same material as cheap posters and that there wouldn't be a relevant fire code that dealt with wallpaper fire resistance?

[–]janitar1 4 points5 points ago*

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almost every douchebag student has a poster of Marley with a joint

This is why people hate your kind.

EDIT: Format

[–]ProfSeverusSnape 6 points7 points ago

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Ok ok I may have said it wrong. Here is a Venn diagram to help better explain it.

[–]AkimboGogurts[S] 4 points5 points ago

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quantity. I like alot of video games :D

[–]Dumpster_Baby 1 point2 points ago

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Where is this video game? I want to play as alot in a video game!

[–]szchm 1 point2 points ago

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"alot of video games" would either be a champion of videogaming, or an alot constructed from discs and plastic cases.

[–]cloudedice 3 points4 points ago

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an alot constructed from discs and plastic

Like this

[–]ThatRemindedMeOf 1 point2 points ago

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I love you so much..

[–]Offensive_Brute 17 points18 points ago

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As the guy who gets paid every 2-3 years to remove the adhesive glue, and patch the pin and nail holes all over your dorm rooms and repainting while you're gone for the summer, I endorse the practice of using the strongest adhesives possible, and the fattest self anchoring screws you can find to destroy the plaster and sheet-rock and woodwork in your dorm. You help guys like me put food on the table every time you put double sided mounting tape on a wall, and duct tape on a natural wood finish.

Support the 99% fuck your dorm walls up.

[–]Cozmo23 3 points4 points ago

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I really want to take an axe to a dorm room wall now and know the whole time, "I'm doing a good thing"

[–]MantisTobagan 10 points11 points ago

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I'm sorry we were all to busy thinking about Lana and Archer having sex! (Cyril cries)

[–]AkimboGogurts[S] 10 points11 points ago

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"taking her up in his big sinewy muscly arms and just UH UH UH UH UH OH YEAH"

[–]Beericksen 38 points39 points ago

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Current RA here....It's our job if I wasn't getting paid I wouldn't care

[–]ballaedd24 12 points13 points ago

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Fellow RA here, I totally have to agree with this. If I didn't HAVE to do the things I do, I wouldn't do it.

[–]Beericksen 11 points12 points ago

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Hears bottle drop in room......could have been a coke..

[–]ballaedd24 6 points7 points ago

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Hears bottle drop in room..... hmmm... I want some...

ftfy

[–]Assaultman67 5 points6 points ago

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I once had the RA's girlfriend stop by our room and ask for some beer.

We thought it was a trap ... surprisingly wasn't.

[–]benjick 1 point2 points ago

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What does RA mean?

[–]ballaedd24 2 points3 points ago

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Residential Advisor... people who have to live with residents of the dorm to pretty much make sure no one dies on their watch.

send a gift to us from sweden :)

[–]benjick 1 point2 points ago

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Oh, oh. cheers. Gift? Sweden? Woot

[–]DevinTheGrand 1 point2 points ago

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I don't know why people think saying "it's my job" makes it better when they do unjustifiable things. Soldiers, police officers, lawyers - they all say this like that makes it okay. If you're a mercenary for a bad cause that's almost worse than doing it for free.

[–]ProfSeverusSnape 11 points12 points ago

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except in this case at least it is a justifiable thing. a policy written for the safety of the students, the compliance with state/federal/insurance mandates, and to cover the universities asses in case of an actual fire, is a justifiable policy. Just because a student feels or believes that its unjustifiable doesn't mean "well I guess i should just fuck it".

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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I think that's the important thing to remember. Colleges don't want to babysit their students. But we do want to keep things safe, and we're generally doing everything with the students' best interests in mind. Sorry to break it to you college kids, but it's the truth- most of you have WAY less common sense than you think you do, fewer problem solving skills, and a general lack of critical thinking. The rules at dorms aren't life changing and they aren't fascist crack downs. They're in place to keep you physically and financially safe.

We had a guy at my college "oppose," the "fascist," rule against candles (our campus has a no-candles-of-any-kind rule), which he felt was unreasonable and that candles were totally safe and wouldn't be a problem at all. Surprise surprise, he fell asleep and the candle tipped and the hot wax was hot enough to light his carpet on fire. The fire didn't spread from there, thanfully. Only the carpet lit. Made enough smoke to set off the alarm in the whole building though, which set the sprinklers off. This resulted in $50,000 of water damage.

[–]ZuchinniOne 1 point2 points ago

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He would have made it out of the building alive ... but got distracted by the kickass poster ... it's so sad.

[–]ShinshinRenma 1 point2 points ago

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What on earth do you think an RA does within the scope of their job that justifies civil disobedience?

[–]Beericksen 1 point2 points ago

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If I was not the RA I wouldn't be doing it. I'm not saying it makes it okay. I'm just saying if I didn't have to I wouldn't.

[–]ThatRemindedMeOf 1 point2 points ago

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Amen. Im the head resident of my dorms. The only reason I do my job is because I like having the studio apartment. I dont power trip. I usually let small things go, like if you need 5 more minutes in the kitchen when I need to lock it up. But by god, dont think having sex in the bathroom is something I can let slide by.

[–]ShinyMechanic 9 points10 points ago

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As an RA myself, I can't fathom why that would be necessary. So, why? What harm could posters possibly do?

[–]Zoccihedron 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Pataracksbeard 2 points3 points ago

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I was him for halloween! Proof. I said that line quite a bit.

[–]BakulaSelleck92 2 points3 points ago

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Even though it isn't Archer, I still read it in H. Jon Benjamin's voice.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]pubgrub 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Cheesecaked 11 points12 points ago

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Hello Andrew. :) I have seen you brag about this on Facebook. Don't you have finals to study for?

[–]AkimboGogurts[S] 3 points4 points ago

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Thanks for posting my name, and yes, but LOL studying

[–]Cheesecaked 4 points5 points ago

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Impressive, most impressive. But you are not a Jedi yet!

[–]nefariousity 1 point2 points ago

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'LOL exams' are brutal.

[–]moetan 1 point2 points ago

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Your RA controls what is on the walls INSIDE your room? ಠ_ಠ

[–]ProfSeverusSnape 1 point2 points ago

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Yes...yes he does ~Phineas

[–]thefakejew 1 point2 points ago

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I don't get it

[–]Drcool54 1 point2 points ago

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My RA's policy is "don't have me do any paperwork." He doesn't really do anything

[–]busche916 1 point2 points ago

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as an RA, that's more or less my policy as well

[–]njm1314 1 point2 points ago

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Why would an RA be able to dictate the content of posters in the private room you pay for?

[–]GoGoGadgetPants 1 point2 points ago

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http://i.imgur.com/6WqY3.jpg Had this one in my dorm.

[–]hippocrates101 1 point2 points ago

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I am a current RA, and there is no regulation against posters being put up in the community unless they are blocking vents. What college do you go to? That is a load of crap.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Just be like, "oh I forgot I didnt pay."

[–]caracarn 1 point2 points ago

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What's an RA ?

[–]myhandsarebananas 2 points3 points ago

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I feel like you might live on my floor, What school?

[–]AkimboGogurts[S] 7 points8 points ago

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I go to Cal Poly

[–]Simco_ 43 points44 points ago

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830 physics??

[–]AkimboGogurts[S] 17 points18 points ago

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Isnt everyone?

[–]whatwasit 5 points6 points ago

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Holy shit it's happening again!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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awesome poly or pomona?

[–]AkimboGogurts[S] 3 points4 points ago

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In Slo

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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can you recommend any good places to eat on campus?

[–]DANKhoala 4 points5 points ago

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Avoid on-campus food. Go off-campus, way better food for cheaper prices. Breakfast Buzz on Tuesday mornings with a buddy, Pancho Villa's, Fatte's Pizza on Broad (2 for 1 pizzas AND they deliver!), etc. Take the bus if you have to, it's worth it.

But if you must eat on campus, I'd recommend Sandwich Factory, the Ave's salad bar, and Campus Market's breakfast burritos and pizzas (the bacon and egg burrito is 3/4 bacon, 1/4 egg). The Grill in Metro used to rock but I hear they turned it into a lame buffet now.

[–]AkimboGogurts[S] 2 points3 points ago

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Everything is horrible in metro ;_;

[–]lmoirkeee 1 point2 points ago

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Also, High Street Deli between 4:20 and 5:00 pm. All sandwiches are $4.20

[–]AkimboGogurts[S] 1 point2 points ago

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VG's, the sandwich place, Chick-fil-et or whatever, the pizza place, and the bagel shop. Disregard Metro, acquire actual food. Also anywhere off campus is incredible.

[–]iLikeCode 2 points3 points ago

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It probably has to do with fire code. In my dorms you can't cover more than 40% of your door with "stuff".

[–]Well_Spoken_Token 1 point2 points ago

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Archer quote.

[–]poptart2nd 14 points15 points ago

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oh is that what it's from? thanks, i didn't recognize it from the picture.

[–]squiggothhunter 28 points29 points ago

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Don't be shitty Barry

[–]midor 4 points5 points ago

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Nothing two steel rods and 16 titanium screws couldn't fix.

[–]jajison 0 points1 point ago

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Dr. Cox keeping it real.

[–]firedfns13 0 points1 point ago

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WHERE DEO I GET THIS!?

[–]Bobdoleomega 0 points1 point ago

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haha I love Archer!

[–]hayden_evans 0 points1 point ago

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As a former RA I have never heard of any reason to take down posters other than if it was something like a Nazi flag, something racist or offensive in any way. You only had too many and none were of anything offensive? That sounds like bullshit to me if that's the case.

[–]Zoccihedron 1 point2 points ago

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Some universities have a policy that you cannot have more than a certain percentage of your wall covered because of fire safety. I am unsure whether or not this policy makes a difference in the event of an actual fire.

[–]no_the 0 points1 point ago

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How often is your RA actually in your room to enforce his rules?

[–]Indeedee 0 points1 point ago

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Is that an outpost of the Country of Kickassia?

[–]AkimboGogurts[S] 1 point2 points ago

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Ah yes a fellow Citizen! Welcome.

[–]Indeedee 1 point2 points ago

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does kickassian salute

[–]byitsrightname 0 points1 point ago

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also yes.

[–]Cickle_Funts 0 points1 point ago

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I don't get it.

[–]coopNW 0 points1 point ago

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This has been the crown jewel on the wall of my apartment for almost a year.

[–]prplhayes 0 points1 point ago

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Watch out guys. We got a badass here.

[–]Saphron184 0 points1 point ago

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Bring archer back!!!

[–]Guard01 0 points1 point ago

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I've had that quote in my room printed on paper (love archer) for about 6 months now.

[–]jak_jak 0 points1 point ago

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I'm an RA, and all I have to say is that they can get fucked!

[–]Rcp_43b 0 points1 point ago

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I am so fucking happy that an Archer related post finally made it to the front page!!! I fucking love Archer.

[–]Capo_Hitso 0 points1 point ago

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Oh yeah cool, you caused a fire hazard and defended it against authority, right on man. That's totally important, but what's really important is:

When do I get to see episodes of Archer past heart of archness?

[–]Salivation_Army 1 point2 points ago

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January 19th.

[–]crash_over-ride 0 points1 point ago

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Former RA here, wtf? Unless they're violating fire code we really can't do shit.

[–]Flinkgutt 0 points1 point ago

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What the hell is an RA? I get it's some sort of "safety" thing since people talk about "fire hazards" but what the hell does it stand for?

[–]dummythumb 1 point2 points ago

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RA - resident advisor.

[–]TheAesthete 0 points1 point ago

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YOU'RE NOT MY SUPERVISOR!

[–]soflyguy 0 points1 point ago

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fort kick ass, has no rules, and needs no rules, for everyone kicks ass inside fort kick ass

[–]IsaakCole 0 points1 point ago

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As an RA, I agree with your decision whole-heartedly.