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all atheists go to heaven (i.imgur.com)
submitted 8 months ago by swagmatic
[–]lordylor999 93 points94 points95 points 8 months ago
Relevant QI clip
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M4AXOmPZ6fo
[–]KingofCraigland 22 points23 points24 points 8 months ago
Want to watch so bad...Hate work so much...Must. contain. anger...
[–]aquasucks 72 points73 points74 points 8 months ago
I PMed you the link so you can easily find it when you get home.
[–]SamsquamtchHunter 22 points23 points24 points 8 months ago
Good Guy aquasucks
[–]GiggleChuckle 5 points6 points7 points 8 months ago
I read that as Assquacks.
[–]ConstipatedNinja 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Well, sometimes, when I've been eating a lot of beans.
[–]MartinTrankell 3 points4 points5 points 8 months ago
This is some real life good guy gregging, man.
[–]wolfmalfoy 10 points11 points12 points 8 months ago
I completely and utterly love David Mitchell
[–]grubas 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
That actually blew my mind when I first saw it, because we went over Pascal's Wager in High School, and I came to basically the same conclusion. The Jesuit who was teaching the class was amused by my confusion over the "right" answer.
[–]sirflappy 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
Another Relevant Youtube video http://www.youtube.com/user/DarkMatter2525#p/u/37/TLGGKraKmXc
[–]oh_herro_prease 189 points190 points191 points 8 months ago
TIL God is a bro.
[–]s-mores 69 points70 points71 points 8 months ago
Yup. God prefers atheists
[–]speed22 13 points14 points15 points 8 months ago
I fucking hate that art style, but I'll upvote anyway.
[–]Hippopoptimus_Prime 8 points9 points10 points 8 months ago
Good. Use your aggressive feelings, boy. Let the hate flow through you.
[–]Vitalstatistix 21 points22 points23 points 8 months ago
You should see God gargoyle on the keg.
[–]super_dave_cares 24 points25 points26 points 8 months ago
I told God, "listen, it's puff puff pass... not puff puff puff"
[–]I_TAKE_HATS 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
That takes some balls to tell him that
[–]jabb0 7 points8 points9 points 8 months ago
You better show some spect!
[–]immatureboi 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
"And to the right! The right goddamnit!"
[–]Alaukik 26 points27 points28 points 8 months ago
That explains all the sexist stuff in the bible.
[–]WaterMist 7 points8 points9 points 8 months ago
The bible was written by men. So I'd like to think of God as a brosis.
[–]herintheselights 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
broble?*
[–]WaterMist 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
As in instead of God being a bro I prefer to think of God as a brosis as in "brother-sister". Aka he's gender neutral in his ... uhhh. favouritism.
[–]Barneyk 21 points22 points23 points 8 months ago
Yeah, I was gonna upvote but the last frame made me downvote instead.
[–]BodePlot 23 points24 points25 points 8 months ago
I don't know if it helps or if you made the connection or not, but I'll explain the joke with one of my other comments:
The joke relates to the second frame. He didn't give us the capacity for extreme sexual activity just to reward those who repressed it. Basically, if the second frame is true, the third frame follows logically. C'mon, you'd think that this is the sort of humor we would enjoy here.
[–]Barneyk 9 points10 points11 points 8 months ago
The concept of "sluts" is a complicated one but I do not like the objectification and dehumanization that "rustle up some sluts" infer.
A free and open sexuality does not equal "rustling up some sluts".
[–]agator2 34 points35 points36 points 8 months ago*
Sluts implies a form of oppression on women. This forces women in a submissive form whose only duty is sex. He shows you women and you just thing how you can fuck them and be done with it. This means that the women's lives are not taken in account and one perspective is lost and the aftermath of this lapse in perspective is lost on the one "looking for sluts".
There is no male version of slut because men have not been put into a submissive hypersexualized box. This lack of symmetry is the first sign that it is a form of sexism and then, by definition, oppression. In fact the male version is a 'man-slut'. Slut would then have to be default a women. Implications from this is that women are made for sex and men can pretend to be sluts but are imitations of our female counterparts who are indeed just for sex.
tl;dr The word sluts implies an enormous level of negativity and its use alone is the problem.
EDIT: I am a man. I just think that empathy towards and recognition of the situation of women shouldn't be put into a separate section of the internet.
[–]the_whirly_wind 16 points17 points18 points 8 months ago
I agree and admire your insight. Im a women and the last frame made me feel unwanted even Im not a proper slut, hahaha thanks for explaining my own feelings in a precise and gender concious fashion.
[–]Qxzkjp 8 points9 points10 points 8 months ago
There is no male vesion of slut because the male equivalent of slutdom is the default expectation of how a man should be. Men are the ones who are expected to always want sex. The reason we have the word slut is because it's assumed that most women aren't looking to have sex all the time. Whereas men are expected to always want it, and our culture constantly implies that is their only goal in life, turning them into one-dimensional caricatures in pop culture.
[–]AludraEltanin 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
I mostly agree. In our society one of the expected aspects of masculinity is sexual conquest. If women try to take on a similar behavior, we have degrading names for them. Sexual expectations end up being limiting for everyone.
[–]ssracer 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
This. You should see the shock on a woman's face when you tell her, "glad we came back to your place but I'm not putting out".
[–]SnarledMess 14 points15 points16 points 8 months ago
It's just not funny though. Not being sexually repressed is not the same as wanting multiple encounters with women identified as s l u t s.
[–]missiontothemoon 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
I'm kind of with you here but what the fuck is with the spacing?
[–]SnarledMess 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
avoiding red flags.
[–]DrLibra 7 points8 points9 points 8 months ago
seriously.
[–]AludraEltanin 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
Upvote to you for taking a stand. It's the little rebellions that accumulate over time.
[–]SorryItsMyFirstDay 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
Yeah, I was gonna updown but the first frame made me votevote instead.
[–]agator2 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
I agree with you don't let the downvotes bring you down.
[–]dfinch 3 points4 points5 points 8 months ago
Yeah, I was gonna digg, but I upvoted instead.
[–]Dealybobber 107 points108 points109 points 8 months ago
Trying to explain why I hate this is tricky. I guess it's because the message can be summed up like this:
"As atheists, we're smart enough to not believe in God. But if he did exist, we'd be his favorites and everyone else would go to hell."
[–][deleted] 41 points42 points43 points 8 months ago
And let's not forget the motivation and intrinsic reward is finally getting fucked either by virgins or whores. It's like I've seen this reasoning before somewhere.
[–]on_holiday 18 points19 points20 points 8 months ago
Thank you. I kind of liked it until the last panel. That's really not the heaven I'd want to get in to.
[–][deleted] 8 points9 points10 points 8 months ago
It's good to know that no matter what the belief system, women can be treated as object-driven motivation and little else.
[–]apartamento 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
It's like saying Atheists don't have morals just to spite Christians who say they do.
[–]rmrilke 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Luckily there is no heaven so you don't have to worry about what its like.
[–]SoundOff 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
I rather found it in the same spirit as Roan Atkinson's skit about hell.
A sort of "Wouldn't it be ironic if....." joke. Then again I suck at picking up on subtleties.
[–]Brave_Atheist_Cat 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
All dogs go to heaven because they're stupid.
[–]spook327 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
It would be a rather shoddy heaven knowing that over half of the people I know are going to hell...
[–]shamecamel 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
those who do good for the benefit of mankind and not for a free pass into heaven, those are the holiest of all.
[–]camefortheshow 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
I like to think of it as a counter-point to faith based religion or ideas that require no evidence. There is no argument atheists couldn't reuse that Christians make about who gets into heaven. It highlights the faults and shortcomings of their thought processes.
[–]3yrlurker2ndacct 26 points27 points28 points 8 months ago
So... Atheists are wrong?
[–]MananWho 33 points34 points35 points 8 months ago
But for the right reasons.
[–]den31 12 points13 points14 points 8 months ago
That's exactly right. Even if we atheists were (which we probably aren't) wrong we would still have been right not to believe in god because that would have always been the logical thing to do.
[–]darth_chocolate 19 points20 points21 points 8 months ago*
Furthermore, it's taken for granted by too many people that the existence of a god implies his worthiness of being worshiped.
The god of the old testament deserves rebellion, even if there was 0 chance of ever overthrowing him, he's still an evil fucker.
[–]adhoc_pirate[] 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
Damn straight. I would describe myself as an apathetic agnostic, I accept the possibilty that I there may or may not be a god/higher being/pasta diety, but at the end of the day, I dont care.
If it is finally confirmed that he/it doesn't exist nothing changes, if it is confirm that he/it does exist then I'm not gonna turn around and start kissing his ass, more likely i would want to spit in his face.
[–]chazysciota 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
The bible is fake, but accurate.
[–]ASGTR12 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
It's not the Heaven they need. It's the one they deserve.
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
It's better than being naive
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
http://alltheragefaces.com/img/faces/large/surprised-oh-fuck-no-l.png
[–]unigolyn 32 points33 points34 points 8 months ago
This is pretty much my answer to Pascal's wager.
If an omnipotent, omnibenevolent god exists, it's this dude, not yahweh.
[–]irawwwr 5 points6 points7 points 8 months ago
no weh!
[–]RMcD94 9 points10 points11 points 8 months ago
Someone who sentences the majority of humanity to hell? Real omni-benevolent there bro.
[–]goodolarchie 10 points11 points12 points 8 months ago*
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with senses, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use
-Galileo Galilei
(Imprisoned for heliocentrism)
[–]Phantasmagory 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
I like this irony.
[–]radams713 15 points16 points17 points 8 months ago
Good, but the ending killed it for me. :<
[–]The_Determinator 24 points25 points26 points 8 months ago
Aaaaaaaand all reposts go to reddit.
[–]BoredAlcoholic 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
People who complain about reposts are fucking idiots. You do realize that some people don't spend 24/7 on every popular forum...right? You do realize that with the sheer amount of information posted, it is possible for someone to miss it even if they are online 24/7...right?
[–]euclide760 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
people who complain about people who complain about reposts are idiots, just saying
[–]BoredAlcoholic 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
people who call people idition towards people who complain about people who complain about reposts are idiots, just saying.
[–]OKImHere 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
People who are the fifth to comment in a "You're an idiot" thread are idiots that can't count.
[–]mcbunn 48 points49 points50 points 8 months ago
Get off your high horses, people. The sluts thing is funny because God is the one saying it. It also suggests that the bible is wrong on all of the restrictions of human sexuality, as one wouldn't expect "sluts" to be in heaven.
[–][deleted] 8 months ago
[deleted]
[–]Mrmcmadman 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
Why does our assumption of god's existence have to include Abrahamic restrictions?
[–]Warkitz 40 points41 points42 points 8 months ago
No sluts in heaven?! FUUUUUUCK THAT
[–]PerpaDerp 17 points18 points19 points 8 months ago
They are on loan from hell. Lawls
[–]jonmwilson1979 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
Actually, you wouldn't be able to. That's the point.
[–]Warkitz 5 points6 points7 points 8 months ago
... I wouldn't be able to have sex in heaven?! this shit just gets worse and worse.
[–]GibsonJunkie 5 points6 points7 points 8 months ago
Party at my place in hell!! It's the nice condo by the lava pit. BYOB. I'm grilling. We'll also have hookers and blow.
[–]Warkitz 6 points7 points8 points 8 months ago
Hookers and blow you say? with a nice view? And a grill?
I'll be there in a bit.... and when i get there....I'm making MARGARITASsssss
[–]GibsonJunkie 3 points4 points5 points 8 months ago
It wouldn't be a party without all that stuff. Make sure to be here by 10. We're going to have a movie marathon complete with drinking games. First to die loses. (It's funny because we'd already be dead.)
[–]richunclesam 3 points4 points5 points 8 months ago
In the theoretical heaven where there's no sex, there would be no need for sex. Your entire life would be at the same level of ecstasy as an orgasm, so why would you need sex? Don't think of it as no sex. Think of it as no not-sex. No boredom and no unsatisfied horniness.
[–]OnionBeyach 3 points4 points5 points 8 months ago
I find that more difficult to comprehend than the concept of heaven itself.
Sex is so novel because of the non-sex durations that separate...so the anticipation is heightened. However, all sex all the time might just be (dare I say) mundane?
[–]richunclesam 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Yeah... well this is just one theory that very silly theologian-types bat around. The serious theologians waste no time on this question since it doesn't matter and there's no real way of knowing. The basic premise is that there should be no need for things that pertain to the human body, since we would have transcended that form. So people often think that there won't be hunger, but you can eat if that's something you enjoy. The Bible actually specifies that there won't be marriage in heaven, but it's silent on sex. So a complete open society, hooking up whenever and with whomever you like, would be a theoretical possibility, but only if heaven came with a solution reconciling the problems of rejection (will I feel emotional pain if a girl doesn't want to sleep with me?) and individual autonomy (shouldn't I be able to say no to sex if I don't feel like it?).
But then, the larger point is transcendence of the human form. People who are presently in this form are generally ill qualified to predict the desires of another form. It would be like a caterpillar who had never even seen a butterfly pontificating on the perils of flight, or bemoaning the butterfly's inability to form cocoons.
[–]RupeyDoop 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
If there are no sluts in heaven then I am turning Christian. Wait what?
[–]agator2 14 points15 points16 points 8 months ago
It's the use of sluts that is the problem. It implies that he created these women just for sex. It implies inferiority and submission to male desire.
It is wrong to use in any case, let alone god.
[–]TammyToes 8 points9 points10 points 8 months ago
I don't know what your point is. I love sluts.
[–]throwthisaway2day 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
It's funny. But if anyone's actually read the Bible it seems pretty clear there's not going to be sex in heaven, or gender, and maybe not physical bodies. Basically heaven will be radically different from life on earth in a way that's hard to understand.
When Jesus was asked who would be the husband of a widow who had remarried he said, "You are mistaken, not understanding the Scriptures nor the power of God. For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven." Matthew 22:29-30
[–]PaleBluDot 21 points22 points23 points 8 months ago
a horribly drawn comic with unneccesary misogyny at the end.
TOP OF THE ATHEIST REDDIT
[–]seabass341 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
If it said "let's go find some people to fuck" at the end, would that be misogyny?
Serious question.
[–]herintheselights 7 points8 points9 points 8 months ago
'people' implies gender-neutrality. don't think it would be inherently misogynistic unless your mindset was that way.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
This would be a very weird situation after death.
[–]spreiners 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
agnostic propaganda!
[–]LACFTW 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
mother of all reposts
[–]Nangz 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
So wait....not beliving in heaven gets you into heaven? What the fuck is this shit?
[–]LookADiversion 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
"The only people who deserve an afterlife are those not stupid enough to believe in one." -Stolen from a YouTube comment
[–]wander99 11 points12 points13 points 8 months ago
This kind of garbage is why no one other than atheists take /r/atheism seriously. Grow up.
[–]maine-at-work 6 points7 points8 points 8 months ago
Exactly. I saw this on here before and it bothers me that people upvote it so much. It's like, hey, let's make a worthy point and then start talking about sluts. Maybe God wants to talk about weed, too! Way cool, man.
[–]deniedretried 9 points10 points11 points 8 months ago
It's pathetic that someone could call themselves an atheist and post trash like this comic. So, you have enough logic to dismiss religion, but not enough to realize the objectification of women. Sad. It goes to show most of you are just moronic posers who's new religion is Atheism.
[–]joshg8 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
While I pretty much agree with what you're saying, I really have to point out your "No True Scotsman" fallacy. Atheism isn't some club that means people need to have higher morals and compassion and reasoning ability to call themselves atheist. The only requirement is that you don't believe that there is a God...that's it. It's perfectly possible, nay common, to not believe in God but still be an immature and generally closed minded individual. You're still an atheist by definition.
Okay settle down now, it's just a comic.
[–]peaceboner 10 points11 points12 points 8 months ago
There are two things wrong with this post:
It's a repost that is commonly submitted to this thread.
OP didn't link to the source
[–]Standard_Hippie 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Thanks for that karma cop. I've never seen this before in my life!
[–]Morveyn 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
...that clever bastard.
because it's funny
[–]Fauxtella 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
TIL atheists disrespect women as much as god and the bible.
[–]MakoBoy 9 points10 points11 points 8 months ago
This is posted once per week pretty much :( Come on..
[–]Gentleman_Named_Funk 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
I've been here half a year (not on this account) and this is the first I've seen of it. Honestly, I could see it again tomorrow and still upvote it. I like it.
[–]hyankov 7 points8 points9 points 8 months ago
/r/atheism, the other /r/circlejerk
[–]mirex0_0 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
If Atheists Went to Heaven
[–]Peatore 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Can we compile a list of posts that get posted every other day and link it to the side bar or something?
I mean I really don't mind reposts but the turn over rate on this one is ridiculous.
[–]moxycalt 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
my kinda place !
[–]fanboy_killer 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
I bet Ricky Gervais' new show will start like this.
[–]shawndw 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Now that's a god I can believe in. Not that Orwellian christian god.
[–]Atheistus 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
I don't think it works that way.
[–]AbandonX 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
My only question is will Agnostics be able to receive the same reward?
[–]thebeardsman 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
In the words of dio.
Don't go to heaven 'Cause it's really only hell
[–]Black_Apalachi 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Just to be pedantic, once you have met a god and are aware of their status as such, you are by definition no longer an atheist. In fact, is there a word for somebody who believes (knows) there is a god but who does not associate themselves with any particular religion?
so artistically speaking this is an expression of as deep rooted anxiety that there might be a god and is reassuring you that even if there is one he's probably cool a bro? I agree sounds about as plausible as any other irrational comforting notion.
[–]NonRealAnswer 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Horray for reposts!!!
[–]myredditQWE 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
An Inuit hunter asked the local missionary priest: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" "No," said the priest, "not if you did not know." "Then why," asked the Inuit earnestly, "did you tell me?"
See http://www.rudyh.org/religion-quotes-quotation.htm
[–]BlackZeppelin 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Daniel Tosh had an all to similar joke.
[–]Haemogoblin 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Secular Heaven
[–]Graywolves 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
This is funny and very ironic.
Although I don't understand why everyone brings it down to evidence. I don't affiliate myself with any religion but I don't concider myself atheist. Just read allegory cave or about schrodinger's cat. Want something less philosophical? Check out quantum physics.
Or....do things other than bashing christianity.
Oh look, it's this repost again. Glad to see r/atheism keeping the content original, as always.
[–]Rusty-Shackleford 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
This is a Parodox, no?
[–]Royd 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Alright, i found this comic hilarious.
[–]laiika 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
It still makes no sense than any omniscient being would need to test anyone, or that any benevolent being would only reward the "worthy" creations, when the flaws of the others are the creators own flaws..
[–]SirenPassingBy 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
This.
I get that it's a joke, but by exclusivity it's committing the same mistake.
[–]BeerMe828 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
just showed this to my mildly religious girlfriend who goes "I hope this isn't true, because then u'll be in heaven with a buncha sluts, and I won't be there"
To which I respond, "well, if you want to get to heaven, you should probably try atheism out just to be safe"...
[–]MixedUpZombie 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
this shit needs to stop. THIS is the MOST REPOSTED comic on r/atheism. are we all high like r/trees and just forgot that we already saw this a month ago? i've seen it here like 4 times already! and yes, i am mad, bro.
[–]SavageNoble 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
No thanks. I'm looking forward to nonexistence.
[–]skydromakk 3 points4 points5 points 8 months ago
The Atheist Wager: either when you die there's nothing or when you die there is a God who values your skepticism and lets you into heaven. Sounds good.
[–]Le420 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
Atheists don't believe in God but post a comic about God. All atheists go to heaven, yeah right.
[–]so_insane 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Don't quit your day job.
[–]thefauxphantom 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Looks like I'll be killing myself today. #Sluts4Life
[–]GameVoid 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago
So the moral of this comic is that all atheists are foul mouthed slut chasers?
[–]ThePurpleHayes 25 points26 points27 points 8 months ago
Created in the image of god, too.
[–]swagmatic[S] 14 points15 points16 points 8 months ago
yes
[–]phelpsr 6 points7 points8 points 8 months ago
I mean, I'm pretty foul mouthed, and I do enjoy women that society deems "sluts." I'm annoyed that society still vilifies women who are sexually liberated, but that's another topic entirely. Easy answer, in regards to me, yes.
[–]AtheistSteve 4 points5 points6 points 8 months ago*
"rustle up some sluts" is an excellent phrase. I may have to incorporate that more into my everyday speech.
EDIT spelling
[–]khayber 10 points11 points12 points 8 months ago
"rustle up some sluts" makes it art.
also, "incorporate".
[–]the_littlest_viking 3 points4 points5 points 8 months ago
Wrangle some snooch.
[–]freakydeek 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
the last panel ruins this otherwise great comic strip
[–]gomexz 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
how so?
[–]Alphanova1 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Not funny and I am atheist.
[–]praisecarcinoma 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
I'd still punch God in the face for all the horrible shit he let happen on this planet.
[–]uhhhhwhat 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
I think you meant agnostics. Being an atheist makes the assumption that there is nothing, which is also unproven. The most "reasonable" answer is to understand that the question has not been answered yet. There is no evidence to say either way. It's analogous to asking someone what's on the other side of a door. If they had never been there, then how would they know that there was nothing? Or something? The most reasonable answer is "I don't know."
[–]imrickjamesbyach 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
I think it's more analogous to saying "Is there a unicorn behind that door?" Sure, you really don't know, but I wouldn't believe in it. I think that's why most people here are agnostic atheists.
[–]samesilvermoon 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
How is atheism not a version of believing "shit without evidence"? In the case of god vs. no god neither one can be proved, so why wouldn't it be all agnostics go to heaven. Atheism is just as much of a religion without proof as any religion based on the belief in a god.
[–]NiPlusUltra 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
Because even atheists want to find comfort in the idea of an afterlife.
[–]HappyGoPink 5 points6 points7 points 8 months ago
The point? You missed it.
[–]saintdiscofag 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
That's not the intended point, but the author kind of makes this point anyways.
[–]NiPlusUltra 2 points3 points4 points 8 months ago
Enlighten me.
[–]HappyGoPink 3 points4 points5 points 8 months ago
The comic is lampooning the idea of an afterlife, the utter contradiction of the whole concept of "absentee God". Basically, if you want to make a race of thralls who do nothing all day but worship you without ever seeing you, don't give those slaves the ability to think for themselves. Or, if you just want your free-thinking slaves to worship you, actually show yourself. "Faith" is lame concept, because it essentially tells you to turn off your brain and let your easily manipulated emotions guide you to believe things that cannot be verified. And then you're given license to go kill all the people who don't have "faith" and take their stuff.
[–]SquidsAhoy 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
I hope this is true, only because I also hope purgatory and hell are right next to the gate so that we can simultaneously scare the shit out of Atheists who think they're going to hell, and shock the shit out of theists who are surprised that's their destination.
[–]boyerman 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
I was in mid-coffee gulp when I read the last panel. Almost had a mess right there on my desk.
[–]sausagefeet 1 point2 points3 points 8 months ago
Sadly, most sluts I know claim to be religious. The amount of Cross necklaces in porn is off the charts.
[–]Dontkillmejay 3 points4 points5 points 8 months ago
For some reason I've typed sausagefeet in your RES tag somewhere along the line. Why? No idea.
[–]seldomburn 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
This. So much of this. Besides you'd get forgiven either way right?
[–]Sgeo 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
A God who would do this is just as much of an asshole as one who rejects atheists merely for lack of belief. If God designed us, then, just as he designed our capacity to reason, he designed our mental difficulties in proper reasoning, including those which cause many people to just go with what their parents believe.
[–]thedude37 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
I'm not an atheist, but I found this hilarious anyway :)
[–]HanoverGimp 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
After they rustle up some folk from Salt Lake, Utah, then what?
[–]GreenMan74 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
haha, excellent. also, wouldn't a God who judges morals reward those who don't expect a prize for being good, rather than those who do?
[–]ScubaPlays 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
Scumbag God: Exists, Creates evidence to the contrary.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
Southpark was funnier.
[–]Dadentum 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
Take that, pascal's wager!
[–]sir_nigel_powers 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
And this will be the theme music
[–]TheRealFender 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
not "all" but "only"
[–]Elbardo 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
See this about once a week on this subreddit.
[–]the_griff 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
I've had this theory for years. It originally occurred to me in the context of the artist. It could be argued that the creative people among us are closer to god than others, however most artists I know question established ideas of god more than anyone. Heck, god had an angel like that and he gave him his own sweet pad.
[–]dontaxmebro 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
So god does exist according to this comic and the idiot Christians were infact right. However god is an asshole.
[–]PhilmoreBowles 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
That's not Heaven, it's the zoo. Animals have urges.
[–]salukis 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
PLOT TWIST
[–]critropolitan 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
:p thought the comic was hilarious until the last frame - leave creepy sexist comments to the theocrats and their holy books.
[–]dafones 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
Got damn, atheist sluts.
[–]New_Max 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
This is so old. I stumbled on this exact thing more than a few months ago.
[–]Joevual 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
LOVE this.
[–]Chilloutitsjustmetal 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
Not an atheist, but I smiled.
If you beleive this to be true... then are you really an atheist 0_o?
[–]reddell 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
Looks like atheist god view women much the same as the christian god.
[–]gimmemetal 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
So true if their is a god he's gonna be my wingman.
[–]noagendaproducer 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
This may be old but it is still kind of funny.
[–]HoochCow 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
I would like to think this song is relevant
[–]UnknownArchive 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
Anyone seeking more info might also check here:
source: karmadecay
[–]manbrasucks 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
No surprise that a heaven full of atheist is going to be filled with sluts.
/kidding <3
isn't it explicitly explained that God created human beings for the purpose of mindless worship, and it was Satan who tempted us with the concept of making our own choice apart from God's will? I always enjoy the fact that our free will was met with eternal "punishment" that we have to "make up for" our entire lives was all thanks to Satan who apparently saw humankind as something capable of more, giving us the opportunity to think for ourselves at the cost of his status as God's favourite angel. That was a way bigger sacrifice than Jesus made, anyway.
...No wonder they all think we're satanists, but you gotta admit, that was a real bro move on his part.
[–]funkymonkeyq 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
lols!
i can't upvote this enough.
i think this needs to be made into a movie
[–]Unorigional 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
This is by far the greatest comic I have ever read.
[–]KarmaElite 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
As soon as I read this, I immediately thought of Daniel Tosh's bit on swearing and the Bible.
[–]sglls 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
This comic is bullshit.
Everyone knows that people with soul patches go to hell.
[–]DrSpork 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
I read a great short story on this premise (unfortunately, the site that originated it is down now). In the end, the atheist chooses go to hell because he wants nothing to do with a God that would curse his own followers. Here's a repost.
http://articles.exchristian.net/2002/04/atheist-on-judgment-day.html
[–]FakeLaughter 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
I say we make that a 'thing'...
If you believed in him and didn't worship him, you go to hell -BUT- if you truly believed he didn't exist, then you get a free pass because worshipping something you didn't believe in would be like worshiping a false idol in your mind (can't have you believing in words in a book without it being in your heart now, can we?), so when you die you get another chance...kind of like 'now that it's over, here's your proof, and here's why it all that crazy sounding stuff makes sense...do you admit you're wrong now?'...and we just answer 'yes' and we're in.
On the other hand, if you actually believed in him and weren't honestly repentant according to all his laws, straight to hell with you. You obviously don't need this last chance, you've had your whole life to get the answer right, right?
Someone go get a bible and string together enough verses to make this true.
[–]batmanisjesus 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu repost.
[–]awinnarisyou 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
This gets posted every week. Why?
[–]Brobi-Wan 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
BLACK GOD FTW!
[–]pcsurfer 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
This makes absolutely no sense
[–]I_bought_the_sheriff 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
god is the biggest slut
[–]rubeninterrupted 0 points1 point2 points 8 months ago
So this comic is from my shitty webcomic, http://webcomic.mongreldesigns.com
I will note that every time this gets reposted, it gets more Karma than my original post. That is both cool, and poopy.
all it takes is a username and password
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is it really that easy? only one way to find out...
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