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all 147 comments

[–]derangedsheep 27 points28 points ago

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In all seriousness, isn't this guy on Reddit? I swear he did an AmA...

[–]kitchlol 20 points21 points ago

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Yes he did, he did this for a joke. And wanted to clarify that he wasn't quite that retarded, and had a job.

[–]retrospects 5 points6 points ago

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Link?

[–]kitchlol 21 points22 points ago

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As posted by ihaveanose in this thread: The link.

[–]retrospects 2 points3 points ago

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Thank you sir!

[–]capnjack78 100 points101 points ago

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Take THAT Mom and Dad!

[–]dbousias 17 points18 points ago

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Dude! you're such a rebel!

[–]ScottTheTitan 2 points3 points ago

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That's Cory, I went to college with him.

[–]idiot_radar 1 point2 points ago

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From Eugene?

[–]ScottTheTitan 1 point2 points ago

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um, when I went to college with him it was at Portland State University.

[–]ihaveanose 19 points20 points ago

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[–]Langly- 36 points37 points ago

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Banish him into the Labyrinth

[–]OddAdviceGiver 27 points28 points ago

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Those are awesome knockers!

[–]Langly- 9 points10 points ago

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He would fit in perfectly.

[–]PeacekeeperAl 0 points1 point ago

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[–]sexlexia_survivor 7 points8 points ago

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It's very rude to stare!

[–]lord_nougat 1 point2 points ago

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Whaat?

[–]I_am_a_Kite_AMA 36 points37 points ago

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Can he actually breathe out his nose?

[–][deleted] 65 points66 points ago

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THNEE

Hnnnph

THNEE

Hnnnph

THNEE

Hnnph

(just trying to imagine what he sounds like sleeping on his back).

[–]hellbent4metal 9 points10 points ago

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It's also a good impression of a pug.

[–]Shadax 5 points6 points ago

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Needs more THNERRDDPPDGFGHJ

[–]dietotaku -1 points0 points ago

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haven't laughed that hard all morning XD

[–]Skafsgaard 16 points17 points ago

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My thought exactly!

I'm sure he's having a blast with it, but to me body modification is really a turn off. Not that it makes much of a difference in his case.

[–]Flyflie 4 points5 points ago

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Nope, that's why his mouth is open.

[–]Buckwheat469 4 points5 points ago

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He became a mouth breather.

[–]radog -3 points-2 points ago

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Came here to say this, but you beat me to it. I tip my pickle to you good sir.

[–]thekeanu -1 points0 points ago

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Thanks for letting us all know you came here to say this.

[–]starseeker2 0 points1 point ago

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Thanks for letting us all know you came

[–]live3orfry 14 points15 points ago

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They said I could post anything. So I submitted this repost.

[–]Tiak 2 points3 points ago

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They said I could post anything, so I reposted that repost... Then someone else reposted that repost of a repost. Then they reposted again. And again, and again, and again

Yes, this is a 7th-order repost. Congrats.

[–]synthaxx 78 points79 points ago

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Could have sworn that would have said "Unemployable".

[–]kasim42784 20 points21 points ago

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Could have sworn that would have said "Walrus".

[–]sudowork 5 points6 points ago*

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[–]warcode 3 points4 points ago

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But in all seriousness, wouldn't he be the door in this scenario.

[–]nagonigi -4 points-3 points ago

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Wow, you've really opened my eyes to the situation.

[–]Oneinchwalrus 1 point2 points ago

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:(

[–]Evilsmurf 3 points4 points ago

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I was expecting "a bull".

[–]Theotropho 8 points9 points ago

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I liked the movie Labrynth so much I had to become one the muppets.

[–]ryan101 7 points8 points ago

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Dude better not be getting into fights with that in.

[–]lorenzogobatto 3 points4 points ago

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He is a walrus now

[–]djnathanv 17 points18 points ago

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Old, fyi. :)

source: karmadecay

[–]Kerzy 3 points4 points ago

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He is a Jehovah's Witness.

[–]kaz6199 2 points3 points ago

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:C

[–]Nethal 7 points8 points ago

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Seems Atreyu's subliminal messaging finally pulled through.

[–]Deages 2 points3 points ago

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I feel uncomfortable breathing after looking at this.

[–]skcin7 2 points3 points ago

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Too hardcore for me to handle.

[–]Hyleal 2 points3 points ago

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What happens if his chin gets stuck on it while he's opening his mouth? ಠ_ಠ

[–]HMPoweredMan 4 points5 points ago

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More like a fart knocker.

[–]CaptInsane 5 points6 points ago

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Ha, just wait until he catches that on something or pisses someone off who decides to pull it out

[–]CaptVonTrapp 3 points4 points ago

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I laughed to the point of tears when i imagined him sounding like his nose is perpetually plugged.

[–]CidO807 1 point2 points ago

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I don't even

[–]yep45 1 point2 points ago

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Occupy Nostrils

[–]luigimercier 1 point2 points ago

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Ironic that he's a knocker, considering he's obviously a giant knob.

[–]shananiganz 1 point2 points ago

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Ha. This is my friend Cory! I bet he loves this.

[–]ScottTheTitan 0 points1 point ago

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Hey, that's Cory, I went to college with him. Freshman year first floor Ondine!

[–]SonsOfLiberty86 1 point2 points ago

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I understand the need to be different, but aren't there better ways of achieving uniqueness?

[–]IHv2RtrnSumVdeotapes 3 points4 points ago

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he went into the bathroom and saw a bath towel ring and said "that would look great in my nose"

[–]misterswarvey 2 points3 points ago

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Someone get me the big magnet.

[–]jorvid 2 points3 points ago

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[–]Rekel 1 point2 points ago

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Oh god why

[–]KingGoblin -1 points0 points ago

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He's clearly headed for great things

[–]X-Craft 3 points4 points ago

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One day the opportunity shall knock on his door...

[–]tnicholson -3 points-2 points ago

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Why can't we just put people like this down?

[–]ranma08 18 points19 points ago

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ಠ_ಠ A little harsh, don't you think?

[–]lucasgreen 3 points4 points ago

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Perhaps, but in this particular case, the guy really is a monumental tool bag.

[–]thekilljoy 7 points8 points ago

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at least he's got a hook and hanger for every tool.

[–]Northerninfinity 5 points6 points ago

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You know him personally? Or are you just judging him based on how he looks?

[–]lucasgreen 2 points3 points ago

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He was someone my girlfriend knew when we lived in Oregon.

[–]mafgar 0 points1 point ago

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same

[–]Somnombulist 1 point2 points ago

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I'd judge him by his frequent use of the word "homie", his blog site, and related comments in other threads under the username Quarry.

[–]nobodynose 3 points4 points ago

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Also, he posts photos... but I guess he wants people to know that his pictures aren't just photos, they're... iPhotos. And he's not a photographer, he's an iPhotographer.

Sigh, reminds me of why I hate Apple fan boys so much. I don't see photogs saying "Look at my Nikon Photo of the day" and "I'm a Canon photographer". They just say "Look at my photos" or "I'm a photographer and I use a Canon 50D".

Apple's apparently pretty good at making people think they become cool if people know they have Apple products.

Disclaimer: I don't mind Apple fans. I think Apple does make great products. I DO mind Apple fan boys though. They annoy me.

[–]telim 4 points5 points ago

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...not nearly harsh enough!

[–]gojirAwr 7 points8 points ago

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I bet somewhere out there, somebody is wondering why they can't just put people like you down.

[–]tnicholson -2 points-1 points ago

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Ditto. What's your point?

[–]gojirAwr 2 points3 points ago

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What I was trying to say is we don't know if this guy is actually a douchebag or whatever so it's kinda mean to say that he should die. It's not good to judge people by appearance.

[–]Chairboy -1 points0 points ago

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[–]Northerninfinity 1 point2 points ago

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It's this kind of intolerance that makes me shudder. I bet you that this person is extremely nice.

[–]tnicholson 0 points1 point ago

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Can't tell if joking or dense.

[–]Mark_Lincoln 0 points1 point ago

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Alas, being a 13 year old imbecile is not a capital offense.

[–]PizzaDay 0 points1 point ago

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Elijah Wood?

[–]Kezaia 0 points1 point ago

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GIRUGAMESH!

[–]radient 0 points1 point ago

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...So I became a repost.

[–]theghostofme 0 points1 point ago

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Hey, don't knock it until you try it!

(I'll show myself out)

[–]Mark_Lincoln 0 points1 point ago

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And you lacked the brains for that job.

[–]KoyaHusky 0 points1 point ago

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This is a huge repost from a couple months ago. Not that I mind. But we found the guy in the previous repost. And he was like wow o.o I've become a meme.

[–]bporter84 0 points1 point ago

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That type of shit is an excuse not to get a job or be a productive member of society. Im all for being yourself but people like that end up leaching off family members to get by.

[–]elrows 0 points1 point ago

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Does anyone else wonder "What do you think his friends look like?"

[–]jennatulls 0 points1 point ago

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Left Door Knocker: It's very rude to stare! Sarah: Oh! I'm sorry, I was just wondering which door to choose.

[–]PeacekeeperAl 0 points1 point ago

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Is that Frazier Crane's son?

[–]valkyrie123 0 points1 point ago

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If you need attention that bad try attaching a large neon sign to the top of your head.

[–]hardtogetaname 0 points1 point ago

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who are they?!

[–]secretchimp 0 points1 point ago

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Guy has a serious case of bitch lips

[–]Fearlessleader85 0 points1 point ago

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[–]toothsayer 0 points1 point ago

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Why do I feel the strange urge to just RIP THAT FUCKING THING RIGHT OUT OF HIS NOSE?

[–]DaPurpleCobra 0 points1 point ago

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I showed that to my mom.... she now said I can only be a doctor or lawyer now....

[–]hodderb 0 points1 point ago

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ALISTAR!!!

[–]Mr_Snowballs 0 points1 point ago

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They said I could post anything... so I made a repost.

[–]MidnightSun 0 points1 point ago

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There was an image on reddit long ago that had an overweight goth chick with a caption that said something like "Being a freak doesn't help things... "

Does anyone have that old picture? I thought it worth asking, because it was sort of similar and I've failed at trying to google the image I'm looking for.

[–]pahlmitchell 0 points1 point ago

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I could have sworn that said: "A fucking idiot"

[–]Nethal 0 points1 point ago

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Knock knock

Who's there?

Unemployement!

sooyeahiknowistoleitfromthatguyfromtherepostthreadfuckyou

[–]RyanWasRight -2 points-1 points ago

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I can't be the only one who thought of this: http://i.imgur.com/CsQnm.jpg

[–]NightEmber79 5 points6 points ago

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What huge knockers!

[–]Soggybiscuit 9 points10 points ago*

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Yes, that is a door knocker...

EDIT: Fixed spelling

[–]il_pleut 1 point2 points ago

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Those are the door knockers from the movie "Labyrinth"

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Read my mind, just watched it last night. It's available on Netflix streaming now.

[–]ApokalypseCow -1 points0 points ago

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I can't be the only one who wants to put a padlock through those giant holes in his ears.

[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points ago

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But you won't because you are only talking shit on the internet.

[–]ApokalypseCow 2 points3 points ago

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Aww, is someone feeling a little butthurt? Did mommy not let little schnookumz turn himself into a ferromagnetic testing board? Don't worry, when you grow up you can punch as many holes in yourself as you like.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points ago

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I'm not the one who needs his brother to come defend him on the internet.

[–]Mnementh2230 -2 points-1 points ago

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He's busier than I am - that's why I spoke up.

I'm a professional software engineer, you see, so I have little nuggets of time where I'm just waiting for code to compile that allow me to cruise reddit more frequently than my brother. He's plenty capable of "defending" himself. As a matter of fact, he's much more eloquent than I am. I'll just step aside now and let him demolish you. Have fun!

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

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I'm not feeling very demolished yet. It might take both of you after all.

[–]Mnementh2230 -2 points-1 points ago

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Like I said - he's much busier than I am. However, you really should be rather ashamed of yourself. You've already demonstrated that you have no understanding of abstraction and your level of reading comprehension is... sub par.

If you're not feeling "demolished" yet, it's because you don't have the cognitive ability to understand your own limitations.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Oh thanks, reddit's favorite wikipedia article. Quick question, does dunning-kruger apply only to me? If so, does that mean that you actually realize what an ass you are?

[–]Mnementh2230 0 points1 point ago

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Quick question, does dunning-kruger apply only to me?

No, but you're living through it at the moment - or have you already forgotten your reading comprehension failure from earlier? You've thus far demonstrated the thinking ability of a goldfish, I wonder if your memory is similarly limited...

You've still not demonstrated the meta-cognitive ability to distinguish between an abstract concept and an actual action.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

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I don't think you meant any of that in a nice way!

[–]Mnementh2230 -2 points-1 points ago

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He's making a joke. Laugh, or don't, and move on.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points ago

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No, I like calling people out when they joke about hurting people.

[–]Mnementh2230 -2 points-1 points ago

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He's not talking about hurting someone, he's talking about adding an unintentional piece of jewelry. Or are you unfamiliar with the concept of trolling IRL?

[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points ago

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He is too chickenshit to troll irl which is why he's talking about it on the internet.

[–]Mnementh2230 -2 points-1 points ago

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It's a joke, dumbass: if he's anything like me (and he is, because he's my twin brother), he finds the concept amusing but he's too polite to actually do it.

You can find an idea amusing in the abstract without having a desire to do it to a real person. Being "chickenshit" doesn't even enter in to the equation.

Take your impotent rage and find a better use for it.

[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points ago

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Polite people don't say dumb shit like that. It's mean spirited. You and your brother are chumps.

[–]Mnementh2230 -1 points0 points ago

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It would be mean-spirited to actually DO it. It's not mean spirited to find it funny in the abstract. Or are you a proponent of Thought Crime?

You and your brother are chumps.

Thanks so much for contributing to my opinion that you are, indeed, white trash.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points ago

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First you said it was "IRL" trolling, now you say it's in the abstract. You don't know what you're saying, do you? Even dumb white trash can tell that you and your brother are chumps.

[–]Soup_bones -2 points-1 points ago

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scumbag modification person: pierces everything piece of skin on their face. Gets pissed when people stare.

[–]effilctar -2 points-1 points ago

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So he pierced his nose with a curtain ring? £10 says he's laying in a bedroll right now shouting about 99% and how it's totally the government's fault that he doesn't have a job.

[–]FaZaCon -1 points0 points ago

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Shit like this has made the prospect of having children overwhelmingly undesirable.

[–]ConsistentlyConfused -1 points0 points ago

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I don't get it. What is he supposed to be?

[–]FTFY_urwelcome -1 points0 points ago

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What do I need to do to assure my son doesn't turn out like that?

[–]PeacekeeperAl -1 points0 points ago

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Kick the shit out of him everyday and tell him that people who do piercings have strong AIDS and he'll get AIDS and die. Make him scared of any kind of blood disease. Deafen him so that he doesn't hear any devils music. Fill him full of sawdust

[–]FTFY_urwelcome 0 points1 point ago

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Seems legit.

[–]beitlich -1 points0 points ago

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They said I could be anything. So I became a repost.