The last two bullet points matter most.

Void_it_hard · 10 months

The 7th is my favorite.

Available upon request.

khanfusion · 10 months

You know, in my day, fakes were made with the intention of at least being slightly believable.

soggy_cereal · 10 months

Obviously fake.

seventiesbush · 10 months

Seems legit.

dannyr · 10 months

Literasy skills also help

estherium · 10 months

i especially like the 4th bullet point.

blue_box_disciple · 10 months

Sounds like someone had a very bad experience using this woman as a sitter and has decided to warn others.

Drakeply · 10 months

She is no way 43!

anamericandude · 10 months

I don't think it's even been a week since this was last posted

Pelokt · 10 months

now I know what to put on my resume: personal hygiene available upon request

snickles19 · 10 months

In this case I think they ALL matter

Jaekryl · 10 months

no one noticed "... children of the other inmates"?

Slayer1973 · 10 months

Personal Hygiene on demand. This is a great option to have with any babysitter.

jskellizzle · 10 months

After drinking and showering with her inmate friends, I think she likes to put babies to sleep by giving them narcotics and then sitting on them while reading and writing. Or did I misinterpret that?

kafkalikeskittenstoo · 10 months

her references = I've been to prison let me hang out with your kids!!

NoRaptors · 10 months

"I have basic literasy skills". Except for spelling and punctuation, it seems.

JtCallebro · 10 months

repost

Aleksander73 · 10 months

"Reliable access to pharmaceuticals". What the fuck does that even mean? So what I'm saying is, when I get out of prison can I hang out with your ten year old son.

modernhero · 10 months

her references are straight.

jakejs657 · 10 months

so thats where my mom got our baby sitter...

bax101 · 10 months

I bet she has been in an issue of The Slammer. I'd like to know her name just to look and see.

powerparrot · 10 months

She probably uses her eyes to put children to sleep. Of her breath.

gentrydevonc · 10 months

fuck off

tubcat · 10 months

Personal hygiene on request? I have no clue what that means.

caseyfw · 10 months

Posts from rural north-east New South Wales, Australia on MY reddits? How preposterous!

Spanone1 · 10 months

"I can put any child to sleep" permanently

giveitago · 10 months

...with a headlock.

giveitago · 10 months

If pharmaceuticals are not available I have a home compounding service.

CaptainPorksword · 10 months

I find the first line to be the best after looking at the picture.

EvOllj · 10 months

"other inmates"

"literasy"

prophaniti · 10 months

Really? Pretty sure that the fact that her references are listed as a correctional center should be a pretty big tip off that its fake.

PoopCanoe · 10 months

Well presented, indeed.

brasstrings · 10 months

IF this is real, which is completely possible, it makes me sad.

countrybuhbuh · 10 months

NANA! I've been looking for you forever!

FlightingIrish · 10 months

Fake and gay

ChuckCharles420 · 10 months

Strong selling points. She instills fear unto the child by telling stories of "being in the pen". Child(ren) immediately go(es) to sleep. She pops her Vicodin and continues Lifetime On Demand.

soothfast · 10 months

She simply CANNOT be 43. She looks about 65!

daleok · 10 months

43 years old? Yeah.....in your dreams.

GaspodetheWonderD · 10 months

The last 6 matter most not 2!!

[deleted] · 10 months

I'm impressed by her literasy skills.

[deleted] · 10 months

If she's 43, it's been a pretty fucking rough 43 years.

Ausp3x · 10 months

I don't know about you, but that 4th bullet point was the red flag...

ZeroKid · 10 months

Personal Hygiene upon request

I am so stealing that and putting it on my resume.

billyclub · 10 months

Too bad shes only available when the bar is closed.

vandelay714 · 10 months

Anyone else get douche chills from that?

DrRomines · 10 months

I like the part where she has basic "literasy" skills.

caveat_cogitor · 10 months

I was particularly impressed by #5 - "I am available outside of the regular pub hours"... qualified as fuck.

solitaryman098 · 10 months

If this is real, I feel sorry for her in a way :(

rwingvr6 · 10 months

If she's 43 then I'm 143.

LerithXanatos · 10 months

So the joke is that she can kill your child with OTC medicine? I'm so confused right now.

myrandomname · 10 months

OP, I disagree. All of these bullet points matter. Since most of them have been touched on, I'll grab:

"Available outside the regular pub hours." So she's a bit of a drinker, too.

roofermann · 10 months

Literasy?

okibum13 · 10 months

Oh yeah.... keeper.

RickHayes · 10 months

How is it possible that that "lady" is 43, when this lady is 42?

whom6du9 · 10 months

"12 years experience babysitting the children of the other inmates". So, they let you have kids in jail now? They're all pretty fantastic bullet points.

thatnerdykid · 10 months

can't... stop... laughing

goonerredandwhite · 10 months

basic literasy

hesmurf · 10 months

References: Grafton Correctional Centre

toshitalk · 10 months

43?! She doesn't look a day over sixty.

Squintz412 · 10 months

this is funny as fucking fuck

Zinxhetan · 10 months

4: ..."of the other inmates".. I say good day!

TheInvincibleBalloon · 10 months

I find the Reference section grabs my attention the most...

Deacon · 10 months

"Will provide references, including name of parole officer."

Deacon · 10 months

This is better than most novels.

WTF

MODERATORS

WTF

MODERATORS

you'll need to login or register to do that

create a new account

login