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all 50 comments

[–]sprinkles123 34 points35 points ago

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The Onion!

[–]goodbatch 15 points16 points ago

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This reminds me of my grandma. Shortly before she died I started to develop an appreciation for the rich life she must have lived, and I asked her to share whether she had any wisdom to pass on to me, a person in my mid-20s. She said, "Nope. This soda is flat, get me another one."

[–]ragincarnage 9 points10 points ago

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Port Richmond? Yeah, nothing golden about living on Staten Island that long.

[–]PrettyCoolGuy 8 points9 points ago

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Oh, I was thinking Port Richmond, Philadelphia. Sounds like the same difference, though.

[–]rudezombie 4 points5 points ago

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haha yeah I was about to say, sounds about right for Port Richmond.. or maybe Kenzington.

[–]Pitchfork_Ninja 0 points1 point ago

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White people in Kenzington? Come on, let's be real here...

[–]rudezombie 3 points4 points ago

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Depends on what part of the neighborhood you're in, but yeah there's plenty. They're like the urban hillbillies of North Philly.

[–]chawd 0 points1 point ago

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I've seen people flying Confederate flags in Kensington. Hell, I'm pretty sure I've even seen a mural with one.

[–]woundedgod 0 points1 point ago

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Born and raised? Got out at 10. Also, Port Richmond and Fishtown are technically Kensington.

[–]timredditwis 0 points1 point ago

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Not true! "Technically" they're just names and there are no official borders. The closest thing to official borders would be the municipalities that existed in Philadelphia County before the 1854 Consolidation. As you can see on this map, Port Richmond was part of the 'Richmond District', and Fishtown was part of the 'Northern Liberties District'.

If you have some other source of technical boundaries I'd love to see it though.

[–]woundedgod 0 points1 point ago

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Older maps. I'll dig around when I get time tonight.

[–]woundedgod 0 points1 point ago

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Kensington.

[–]matstars 4 points5 points ago

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SI, NY baby

[–]logicallyundeniable 1 point2 points ago

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I was thinking the same thing, especially since I work in that golden neighborhood...

[–]Killerbob321 1 point2 points ago

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Hey... we have the Wu-Tang Clan... It's not ALL bad

[–]Abraham_Shovelhands 8 points9 points ago

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Get rich quick: cut open granny and retrieve her kidney stones of pure gold!

Trust me, I'm a Nigerian doctor prince specialist.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Wait, are you a Nigerian who specializes in doctor-princes, or a Nigerian doctor who specializes in princes? Or maybe you're a Nigerian-doctor-prince-specialist who has an unmentioned specialty, like sociology or physics or something.

[–]n99bJedi 1 point2 points ago

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you remind me of my gmat practice exams :/ I will pass that barrier soon!

[–]marcwithac 2 points3 points ago

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Redditors on staten island? Hog wash.

[–]Bodysalt 2 points3 points ago

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Sayboldt is an anagram of my username.

[–]DazednEnthused 1 point2 points ago

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Hey.......cut that out. My head hurts.

[–]MixMixBrad 1 point2 points ago

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There is no "i" in team, but there is an "i" in pie. In meat pie, and meat is an anagram for team. Look I have no idea what the crazy old bastard meant just do a good job.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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You've got red on you...

[–]Zeppelanoid 4 points5 points ago

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Mary, you need to drink more water.

[–]whatever_idc 1 point2 points ago

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So everyday were golden in one way?

[–]jabb0 1 point2 points ago

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As I have always suspected.

[–]AgitpropAndApologia 1 point2 points ago

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So what colour was her urine before the golden years?

[–]AdvLogic 1 point2 points ago

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I laughed so hard that a little bit of gold came out of me.

[–]ilikecheese121 1 point2 points ago

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What a champ...

[–]EdJJ 1 point2 points ago

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Port Richmond Philadelphia . That's my grade school in background . Nativity BVM.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Mary doesn't sugar-coat shit, except for the cookies she makes for her ungrateful grandchildren.

[–]Over9000PointsPlus 1 point2 points ago

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Staten!

[–]razzark666 1 point2 points ago

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Bitch needs to drink more water, she's dehydrated!

[–]7Finger 3 points4 points ago

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TMI, Mary. TMI.

[–]thumper242 13 points14 points ago

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When you're that old, you say whatever the fuck you want.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points ago

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"Not enough information, Mary..." said Bear Grylls

[–]Bitter_Idealist 0 points1 point ago

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[–]ray_MAN 0 points1 point ago

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A statement like this could only come out of Staten Island

[–]trash-80 0 points1 point ago

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Mary needs to drink a lot more glasses of water, she's clearly not deluded enough.

[–]Redcard911 0 points1 point ago

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I think when I'm really old I'm just going to smoke a lot of trees.

[–]jmhdsn 0 points1 point ago

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Or beer

[–]DuckTruck 0 points1 point ago

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She should drink more water!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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I look forward to my golden years. Darn you granny and your freedom to pee wherever you want!

[–]DatoWeiss 0 points1 point ago

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Any relation to Noob Saibot?

[–]skammy16 0 points1 point ago

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sounds like she's dehydrated...

[–]sciencechick 0 points1 point ago

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I laughed so hard

[–]irereddit 0 points1 point ago

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this is what happens when women never marry. plus cats.

[–]papagoose08 0 points1 point ago

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That's the bilirubin talking.

[–]IgnorantlyBlameObama -1 points0 points ago

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And she wont even have that after Obama takes away the right to golden urine...

[–]CheshireC4t 0 points1 point ago

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Nobody expects the novelty account exhibition