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top 200 commentsshow all 206

[–]Phat7 30 points31 points ago

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Another classic: "It's a moo point. It's like a cow's opinion. It's moo."

[–]HotRodLincoln 16 points17 points ago

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One more:

Joey: Okay, okay, uh... ducks is heads, because ducks have heads.

Chandler: What kind of scary-ass clowns came to your birthday?

[–]furbiesandbeans 0 points1 point ago

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A little more context, they were flipping a coin and it had something to do with the chicken and duck. To decide who is heads/tails, he says that line.

[–]HotRodLincoln 3 points4 points ago

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Specifically, they were trying to decide which baby to take home from the lost-and-found and one was wearing clowns and the other ducks.

[–]furbiesandbeans 0 points1 point ago

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Ah thank you. Forgot about that episode. I assumed it was with the chick/duck.

[–]Pyrotix690 0 points1 point ago

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and here is the scene

Joey: Uh... uh, we'll flip for it. Ducks or clowns?

Chandler: Oh, we're gonna flip for the baby?

Joey: You got a better idea?

Chandler: All right, call it in the air.

Joey: Heads.

Chandler: Heads it is.

Joey: Yes! Whew!

Chandler: We have to assign heads to something.

Joey: Right. Okay, okay, uh... ducks is heads, because ducks have heads.

Chandler: What kind of scary-ass clowns came to your birthday?

[–]Freewheelin_ 5 points6 points ago

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Such incredibly stupid genius-ness.

[–]liesandgasoline 1 point2 points ago

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[–]knudow 1 point2 points ago

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Honestly, I never understood this one. English isn't my first language and I always wondered if this sentence was just nonsense or if it was an expresion or word play or something like that. I just laughed at how Joey said it.

[–]InterroBang24 4 points5 points ago

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In North America, a 'moot point' is irrelevant, as it has no practical importance.

[–]Nickbou 2 points3 points ago

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What Joey meant is "It's a moot point." "Moot" means irrelevant or doesn't matter. Joey must have heard this expression at some point but didn't know the word "moot". So instead, he interpreted the word as "moo" because it sounds similar, and then figured out that it must refer to cows. This is because in the US (and many other English speaking countries), the word used for the noise a cow makes is "moo".

Thus, Joey figured that "a moo point" was a cow's opinion. Based on the context of the original phrase, he concluded that it's because a cow's opinion doesn't matter. Joey isn't the brightest bulb, but you can't really fault his logic.

Joey: All right, Rach. The big question is, "does he like you?" All right? Because if he doesn't like you, this is all a moo point.

Rachel: Huh. A moo point?

Joey: Yeah, it's like a cow's opinion. It just doesn't matter. It's moo.

Rachel: Have I been living with him for too long, or did that all just make sense?

[–]knudow 1 point2 points ago

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THANK YOU, I didn't know about the "moot" thing. I have never heard that expresion.

[–]TLUL 1 point2 points ago

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I don't know what you did to deserve the downvotes, but I corrected the injustice.

[–]Xenc 48 points49 points ago

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Homoerectus

[–]jumpup 12 points13 points ago

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best gay porn name ever

[–]acertainpointofview 1 point2 points ago

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You are not a fish, you're a man. You walk around, on two legs...

[–]zerooneinfinity 139 points140 points ago

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Could he be any dumber?

[–]Sleepy_One 56 points57 points ago

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Dumber than say... the people that gave him his own spinoff?

[–]bookey23 3 points4 points ago

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The spinoff would have been amazing if it was Joey and Chandler.

[–]HuruHara 0 points1 point ago

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This is genius !

Estelle, get me Hollywood on the line !

[–]Damasticator 9 points10 points ago

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I think it would have been good had they kept his character the same.

If it were full of scenes like this, it'd still be on today.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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Yeah, but the problem was that if they kept Joey as dumb as he was on Friends, there'd be no way of explaining how he stays alive on his own.

[–]virulentRant 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Nickbou 2 points3 points ago

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Very awkward, but that's mostly because they have pauses in their conversation to allow for the laugh track and there is no background (setting) noise to fill it in.

As a counter example, The Office has no laugh track but the characters don't pause their conversation to allow for one.

[–]virulentRant 1 point2 points ago

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That's the joke.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ AHAHAHAAHAHAHAAH $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

[–]03fb 2 points3 points ago

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Yes,in the last few seasons ...yes

[–]Laundry_Hamper 2 points3 points ago

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Could he be wearing any more dumb?

[–]dermballs 20 points21 points ago

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[–]emptyvoices 1 point2 points ago

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Yes, but then less people would click on it since it's not a pic/imgur link. Sad, but true.

[–]TheMightyDane 0 points1 point ago

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[–]birkoph 57 points58 points ago

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If someone asks "What show is this from?" I'm going to shit myself.

[–]Bipolarruledout 94 points95 points ago

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Seinfeld, duh.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points ago

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Everybody loves Raymond

[–]TimothyEUpham 27 points28 points ago

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It has science. It's obviously The Big Bang Theory.

[–]dhaft88 13 points14 points ago

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Try Weird Al the Science Guy, dick.

[–]layzer253 2 points3 points ago

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No no no, it was clearly Unsolved Mysteries.

[–]Poltras 2 points3 points ago

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Every episode of any TV series is from the Twilight Zone. Some just don't know yet.

[–]donaldcaps 2 points3 points ago

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Actually I'm pretty sure they took the whole idea for the Twilight Zone from Dawson's Creek.

[–]alarumba 27 points28 points ago

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It's that one with the whole bunch of friends in it. I forget what it's called though...

[–]birkoph 71 points72 points ago

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Close Acquaintances.

[–]f03nix 1 point2 points ago

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Close ... but it's ole mateys.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points ago

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Buddies

[–]bruderjakob 3 points4 points ago

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No, no. I think it was called "Pals".

[–]Poltras 2 points3 points ago

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It wasn't called "Pals", "Guys".

[–]TLUL 0 points1 point ago

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It wasn't called "Guys"... aw shit.

[–]MadDogTannen 0 points1 point ago

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[–][deleted] 13 points14 points ago

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It's the 'make twenty-somethings forget they're lonely show' today there's the sequel with Neil Patrick Harris in it.

[–]HuruHara 0 points1 point ago

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today there's the sequel with Neil Patrick Harris in it.

Doogie Howser, MD ‽

[–]Kramol 9 points10 points ago

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Two guys a girl and a pizza place?

[–]paolog 0 points1 point ago

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And another girl. And a place selling coffee.

[–]layzer253 1 point2 points ago

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Must be Tidus.

[–]fatmas 8 points9 points ago

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Chums: "I'll be there always, like the rainfall in Wales"

[–]rospaya 4 points5 points ago

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Chums.

[–]TehDingo 2 points3 points ago

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How I met your mother?

[–]Divtya_Budhlya 2 points3 points ago

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Happy Endings?

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Mookie1515 8 points9 points ago

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No, no, you're thinking of the 'The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down.'

[–]HotRodLincoln 1 point2 points ago

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Cheers.

[–]03fb 3 points4 points ago

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It's the E4 show right?

[–]fonster_mox 2 points3 points ago

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I know where you're coming from but haven't you noticed? It's not on anymore. They sold it to Comedy Central :)

[–]sockatume -1 points0 points ago

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Comedy Central has the "HD" broadcast. Which is in 16:9. You'd think that Comedy Central would show the 16:9 version on anamorphic SD, or the 4:3 version, but no: as with all 16:9 content, they show it letterboxed, in the middle of a 4:3 frame.

They've finally come up with a way to stop me watching Friends reruns.

[–]daypun 0 points1 point ago

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I think they've changed that now. Have a look tonight or whenever its on

[–]HotRodLincoln 2 points3 points ago

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The last episode aired for the first time 7 years ago.

[–]shadow1515 1 point2 points ago

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I was alive for the entire run of that show but I still hardly recognize it because I never watched it.

[–]gsfgf 2 points3 points ago

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You're missing out.

[–]shadow1515 0 points1 point ago

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Well, not never. I saw a few episodes because everyone was always talking about it, I just didn't like it.

[–]OccasionalPopCulture 0 points1 point ago

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Overrated if you ask me.

[–]ronbag 0 points1 point ago

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Id hope you were alive for the entire run, or else youd be like 14

edit: damn 17....

[–]pics-or-didnt-happen 0 points1 point ago

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My six-year-old cousin had never heard of bugs bunny before I showed him.

[–]Poltras 0 points1 point ago

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\Take out camera** What show is this from? \Prepare to take pictures**

[–]mhender -4 points-3 points ago

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I abhor "Friends" and everything about the series. The more who don't know it, the merrier.

[–]dclowd9901 1 point2 points ago

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I'll bite: why?

[–]mhender 0 points1 point ago

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There isn't a joke you couldn't see coming from a mile away... personal grudge.

Its like Nickelback. Popular, but not sure why...

[–]dclowd9901 1 point2 points ago

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I would say some of the jokes were a bit easy (like OP's submission), but often, it was how the cast acted around each other and the delivery that made me laugh, less than the jokes themselves.

[–]Bubblebath_expert -2 points-1 points ago

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I wouldn't have known if I hadn't recognized Jennifer Anniston.

[–]dorfcally 48 points49 points ago

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Not that there's anything wrong with being a "homo" sapien

[–]szchm 16 points17 points ago

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If you can name a heterosapiens, the entire scientific community would be much impressed.

[–][deleted] ago*

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[deleted]

[–]Unique_Identifier 0 points1 point ago

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Unfortunately for you, Sir Ian is gay so exactly what joke you're making becomes a little unclear.

[–]zanhoshi -2 points-1 points ago

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That was the double entendre... Totally not antigay or anything, sorry if anyone got that impression! I'll just remove it now...

[–]Hyperian 2 points3 points ago

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mutant and proud

[–]zanhoshi 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Freewheelin_ 1 point2 points ago

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Oh...I was thinking more along the lines of this.

[–]GreatWhiteFork 17 points18 points ago

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love that I read the lines in their voices too... sad brain

[–]jammastajayt 25 points26 points ago

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  • hahahaha
  • what are you laughing at?
  • Ross said homo

[–]leminwater 24 points25 points ago

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  • heheh
  • homo?
  • no, erectus.

[–]ShapkaSamosranka -5 points-4 points ago

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  • teeheehee
  • homo
  • are my parent comments intentionally misusing unordered lists when they should be using dashes?

[–]qqg3 10 points11 points ago

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I miss this show, I still like to dig the DVD's out because knowing the jokes by heart doesn't make them less funny.

[–]ShinodaCM 15 points16 points ago

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Ahh Joey... I miss that guy...

How you doin'?

[–]Palmuu 8 points9 points ago

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god how I miss Friends...

[–]bowlofcornflakes 8 points9 points ago

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All of Askscience.

[–]roxxe 9 points10 points ago

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insert janice's laugh

[–]Bingsby 6 points7 points ago

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"Oh...my...gawd!"

[–]NullPoint84 4 points5 points ago

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CHANDLAA BING!

[–]SpottedJack 9 points10 points ago

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Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]SpottedJack 4 points5 points ago*

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Redacted comment:

Wrong show.

No shit.

[–]s0bmarine 4 points5 points ago

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Well, homo sapiens was extinct some million years ago. We are a more evolved race, homo sapiens sapiens.

[–]AnonymousNick 2 points3 points ago

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Came here to report this, but you beat me to it.

[–]papa_lurks 0 points1 point ago

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I've heard this before but never bothered to do the research on it.

[–]Kronos86 1 point2 points ago

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I miss this show.

[–]sktrdie 3 points4 points ago

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Friends is the shit

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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My favorite was when Chandler suspected a girl he was talking to online was actually a guy.

Joey: Just ask her when she's going to die. Women live longer than men.

Chandler: How do you not fall down more?

[–]ronbag 14 points15 points ago

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This post reminded me how good of a show Friends was.

[–]HotRodLincoln 0 points1 point ago

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I have seasons 1,2,5 and 10. I want to warn you it's not quite as funny as you remember, but it has its moments.

[–]PubLiic 2 points3 points ago

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I still watch it all the time on nick at nite and the three other stations it plays on.

[–]HotRodLincoln 1 point2 points ago

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I don't have cable, but have seen it on one channel (which suggests its prevalence). It's much better 1 episode at a time than a season at a time.

[–]ronbag 1 point2 points ago

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I have seasons 1-10, which i watched episode after episode. It kept me entertained for a whilee. It's just been a long time since then.

[–]mrsquare 5 points6 points ago

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People like to bash Friends, but in fairness it was a damn funny show.

The first time you watched it.

Like the Simpsons.

[–]Ginnigan 1 point2 points ago

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Pfft, I can watch (and have watched) the same episodes of the Simpsons several times and laugh every time.

[–]WarPhalange 16 points17 points ago

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Wow. I didn't even know they had jpegs when this thing was created.

[–]Sceptix 2 points3 points ago

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I remember this episode!

[–]Wertyui09070 2 points3 points ago

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it was probably on TBS yesterday

[–]Sceptix 1 point2 points ago

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Yea probably.

[–]brok3mon 2 points3 points ago

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I love Friends.

[–]qqg3 5 points6 points ago

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Friends! AWESOME.

[–]unknownLost 8 points9 points ago

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it's funny because when I read it, I don't have to wait for the terrible laugh track

[–]mishugana 1 point2 points ago

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Even better is the Ali G interview.

[–]Rommel79 1 point2 points ago

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That episode is like 15 years old, but that part cracks me up every time.

[–]Matlopsa37[S] 32 points33 points ago

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I just down voted all of the ones hating on Friends. Haha.

[–]vote_up 10 points11 points ago

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Yeah! How dare them not to like something you like.

[–]YOUR-UNCLE 41 points42 points ago

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How could anyone hate friends? I haven't seen a funnier show in years.

[–]Physics101 44 points45 points ago

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Schindler's List.

[–]herpty_derpty 16 points17 points ago

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That's not a funny show...it's a funny movie.

[–]dubdubdubdot 2 points3 points ago

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Giggles violently.

[–]Deklaration -1 points0 points ago

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Chandler's Tits.

[–]roxxe 12 points13 points ago

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grave of the fireflies

[–]jacobo 4 points5 points ago

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[–]SAMDOT 4 points5 points ago

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Arrested Development.

[–]HuruHara 1 point2 points ago

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Why did you bold the period

[–]BoJangles00 9 points10 points ago

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Breaking Bad.

[–]xFaded 1 point2 points ago

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haha yeah... wait wat?

[–]TarBarrel 2 points3 points ago

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You mean you don't laugh histericaly at least once every episode?

(No sarcasm)

[–]wickedmonster 2 points3 points ago

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Funniest. Show. Ever. Especially when Jesse keeps crying because of his chosen path.. man.. literally!

[–]Esmelliw 10 points11 points ago

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Community

[–]acertainpointofview 3 points4 points ago

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Party Down

[–]mnmleon 1 point2 points ago

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come and see

[–]ro4ers 0 points1 point ago

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Scrubs was kinda close, but not on the Friends level.

[–]gobeavs1 0 points1 point ago

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Me too.

[–]DrJorneyBrongus 0 points1 point ago

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How could anyone hate on "Watch a bunch of models act like 5 year olds"?

[–]Kennethnoisewasser 0 points1 point ago

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Make a post about Sex in the City.

[–]Eff_Tee 1 point2 points ago

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Really? We're mining Friends for jokes now? Go back to Louis C.K. please.

[–]Hyperian -1 points0 points ago

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should ask the better question of how come new york has no black people.

[–]TehDingo 1 point2 points ago

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Except for Aisha Tyler.

[–]Fvel 0 points1 point ago

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This is every Thanksgiving with my family... >>

[–]GregOttawa 0 points1 point ago

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x-post from r/askscience

[–]imwatters 0 points1 point ago

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Ah yes, the good ol' homosapiens joke.

[–]BigEye537 0 points1 point ago

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haha, must've missed this episode!

[–]Arzoreth 0 points1 point ago

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We are not Homo Sapiens (≈knowing man). We are Homo Sapiens Sapiens (≈man that knows that he knows).

[–]fullofit 0 points1 point ago

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Welcome to /r/askscience!

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]dakkr 2 points3 points ago

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god damn i feel old. And i'm only 20.

[–]Vectoor 8 points9 points ago

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Pretty sure he is trolling.

[–]whatevers_clever 0 points1 point ago

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Friends, there are reruns from noon til like 5pm cst... I think on tbs but im not sure. The how I met your mother of the 90s

[–]Agehn 2 points3 points ago

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Is How I Met Your Mother the current-day Friends then?

[–]Cuerzo 9 points10 points ago

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They wish.

[–]Agehn 0 points1 point ago

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Yeah. Friends was huge. HIMYM is really good (or it was the first couple seasons when I watched it) but it's not.. pervasive, like Friends was. I dunno.

[–]whatevers_clever 0 points1 point ago

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Not saying it is better or worse, it just has the same formula.

[–]dhenriq1 2 points3 points ago

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Is how I met your mother really THAT popular? I've never had a chance to see a full episode

[–]TehDingo 1 point2 points ago

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It is pretty good and it has a pretty unique premise that makes it stand out in addition to great writers and actors.

[–]loafybrown -4 points-3 points ago

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[–]GueroCabron -5 points-4 points ago

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Must have been one of those 'Had to been there' moments, or maybe one of those, 'Thought friends was funny' moments

[–]Hookhand -1 points0 points ago

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This is incorrectly submitted to r/funny

[–]Basmati_Rice -1 points0 points ago

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It's amazing friends isn't even funny on reddit!