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595
596

How to win an eating contest (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by NewUploader1

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[–]wutitdopikachu 254 points255 points ago

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Once, during lunchtime as a kid, I sneezed and a shit load of snot came out of my nose. This caused the girl sitting across from me to vomit up her ice cream, leading to a chain reaction of children vomiting.

I got in trouble. FUCK THE MAN.

[–]7ypo 42 points43 points ago

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I once got in trouble for sneezing too loud.

I feel ya man.

[–]DepressedRacoon 23 points24 points ago

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I once farted so loud another student's chair apparently vibrated, and I was kicked out of the lesson.
Worth it.

[–]Vole85 31 points32 points ago

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I once got in trouble because a teacher asked the time and I replied with "12:02" (I had a digital watch). She said I was being facetious. I wasn't. Bitch.

[–]dlue2 4 points5 points ago

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I once got in trouble for being on the computer at work. Fucking manager how do you expect me to work with reddit there?

[–]NewUploader1[S] 12 points13 points ago

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Once I got in trouble at work for having sex in the bathroom with a coworker...almost got fired.

[–]fearofthesky 9 points10 points ago

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I think the boss wanted in on that, too.

[–]SchpartyOn 4 points5 points ago

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Continue...

[–]Basilisc 13 points14 points ago

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A girl in my class gets punished at least once a week for hiccuping too loud, I get pissed off every time.

[–]7ypo 5 points6 points ago

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So tell her to hiccup more quietly!!!

[–]Basilisc 1 point2 points ago

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She can't help it, she really has tried

[–]super_dave_cares 15 points16 points ago

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One time in 5th grade during choir practice, girl standing next to me farted really loud. She immediately turn towards me and said, "daaave...ewww." Everyone turned their heads toward me, and said, "dave... did you do that?" They all giggled and looked down upon me as the kid who farted in choir practice. I didn't say anything, cause that would just make me look more guilty anyway. It had a deep impact in my life. Anyway... Hello, everyone. My name is Dave, and I'm an alcoholic.

[–]dlue2 2 points3 points ago

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Hiiiii daveeee

[–]DOBBYISDEAD 2 points3 points ago

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Dave, I'd tell you about this thing I go to to help me with my issues, but I can't. See, the first rule of the club is that you can't talk about the club. The second rule... is that you can't talk about the club. Anyway, see you at Lou's on Friday nights.

[–]super_dave_cares 1 point2 points ago

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all I ever wanted was to be a veterinarian....

[–]Stregano 1 point2 points ago

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Dobby, I am a member. Look at my face.

I have never seen you there. I go on Saturdays

[–]movlag 0 points1 point ago

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Leave the stunts up to Super Dave

[–]MNico 0 points1 point ago

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There was a girl in my school who had the same problem. Her hiccups were quite loud, but everyone understood that she couldn't control it.

My friend also has the same problem, except he has little baby hiccups.

[–]heyfatkid 0 points1 point ago

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I got sent to the principal for yawning.

[–]chazferrari 7 points8 points ago

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peristaltic chain reaction.

[–]Vainglory 4 points5 points ago

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Girl was weak. it's a little gross, but not throw-up-gross.

[–]Xility 1 point2 points ago

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I knew a kid who did that every time he sneezed. It is pretty gross.

[–]humblerodent 1 point2 points ago

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That sounds familiar.

[–]TCBloo 0 points1 point ago

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What the Fuck did I just watch?

[–]fswmacguy 1 point2 points ago

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Obligatory clip from The Office.

[–]toadkicker 0 points1 point ago

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Occupy Lunch Room!

[–]VikingBoatTruckBoat 74 points75 points ago

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The guy next to him looked like he was about to die after he saw that.

[–]Ghostraider 30 points31 points ago

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I couldn't stop laughing at the blond girl's smile.

[–]notorious514 16 points17 points ago

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she didn't see shit

[–]Piratiko 0 points1 point ago

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And her owl-head maneuvering

[–]MightyJoeBong -4 points-3 points ago

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I noticed and had a nice hardy lol.

[–]district9 3 points4 points ago

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I'm betting the girl in pink (brunette) wasn't far behind as soon as she realized the dude palmed some chunks back onto her chest...

[–]Jonegroove 0 points1 point ago

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I can't stop laughing at he's reaction! He just happen to look up at the other guy right on time lol!!

[–]Banned_OnThe_Run 68 points69 points ago

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Ah yes the old throw up, eat again cause other contestant to hurl tactic.

[–]thewolfcastle 34 points35 points ago

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Textbook.

[–]thecacti 6 points7 points ago

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Works every time!

[–]PositiveFalse 3 points4 points ago

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HHUOAARGGLLLulp!  Nom nom nom nom...

[–]Tamnegripe 36 points37 points ago

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That strangely looked like an astronaut drinking chocolate milk in zero g.

[–]Montzterr 1 point2 points ago

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ahh yes, that classic chunky chocolate milk that was left out of the fridge for a few weeks

[–]aminnnn 16 points17 points ago

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Source?

[–]apatheticappeal 20 points21 points ago

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Here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYmLc84x6Z4

[–]kmreid 0 points1 point ago

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I just, it...I don't, it is just.....nevermind.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points ago

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For some reason i can't stop watching this

[–]DFTBAlex 0 points1 point ago

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Fascination with the Abomination. It'll get ya every time.

[–]moootPoint 30 points31 points ago

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Chunk: But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.

Jake Fratelli: I'm beginning to like this kid, Ma!

[–]DISavowwED 8 points9 points ago

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I'm very sensitive to throw up, but it looks so cool for some reason. I'm in a state of nausea and amazement right not and I can't stop watching it O.o

[–]charest 2 points3 points ago

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This is so wrong! I love it!!!

[–]rygarths 2 points3 points ago*

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Another regurgitated gif.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Barf-o-rama.

[–]Trubbis 1 point2 points ago

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Oh god that's disgusting, and hypnotizing..

[–]wondertwins 1 point2 points ago

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WHAT. THE. FUCK...

[–]dethbytoyota 1 point2 points ago

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???... What am I looking at?

[–]cl0uder 1 point2 points ago

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I watched it over and over and still LOL'd every time.

[–]saladin_zodiac 1 point2 points ago

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A complete and total Barf-o-Rama.

[–]PolarBurs 1 point2 points ago

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"Smell my finger!"

BRLAHHH. OM NOM NOM.

[–]dannunzio 1 point2 points ago

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This seems to be a strategy because the guy next to him begins to vomit as he watches the other guy catch his own vomit.

[–]Santeria37 4 points5 points ago

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That woman must have had some gross-smelling fingers.

[–]PlatonicTroglodyte 2 points3 points ago

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Blah. NSFL.

[–]Ceeni 2 points3 points ago

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Not safe for emetophobics :(

[–]thejohnnyfine 12 points13 points ago

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Really? Life's bodily functions are NSFL?

[–]primenumbersturnmeon 54 points55 points ago

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Not safe for lunch?

[–]ThunderingNuisance 7 points8 points ago

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I'm pretty sure it's not a normal bodily function to consume one's own vomit.

[–]Bainato 3 points4 points ago

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It is if your a dog.

[–]supertom 5 points6 points ago

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your a dog

ಠ_ಠ

[–]Bainato -1 points0 points ago

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;)

[–]fearofthesky 3 points4 points ago

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Who does the a dog belong to?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Cowcist!

[–]BlueThen 1 point2 points ago

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Yes.

[–]mrpeabody208 0 points1 point ago

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Counterpoint: 2 Girls 1 Cup is nothing if not bodily functions.

[–][deleted] ago*

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[deleted]

[–]sumoshart 4 points5 points ago

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Oh, okay.

[–]MOAR_KRABS 1 point2 points ago

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Haha well played.

[–]sumoshart 0 points1 point ago

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Thanks. I can't claim creation rights though, as another redditor laid this on someone else a while back.

[–]Mhaelful 0 points1 point ago

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I'm in class. I have to hide behind the tall guy in front of me I'm laughing so hard.

[–]daryldumpling 8 points9 points ago

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On Sunday?

[–]Mhaelful -4 points-3 points ago

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Academia seven days a week.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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Or you're full of shit.

[–]Kinpaku 1 point2 points ago

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I had weekend classes when I was a kd. If you are asian, chances are you went to some sorta of cram school on the weekends.

[–]Mhaelful 0 points1 point ago

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While I'm not Asian, I do have a big overload this semester. Have an upvote for choosing to be supportive instead of insulting.

[–]sumoshart 0 points1 point ago

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What's that?

[–]heyfatkid 0 points1 point ago

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Is that his tongue?!

[–]lizabisky 0 points1 point ago

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I love how the other guy starts to puke. I love puke chain reactions.

[–]SimpleShrimp 0 points1 point ago

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I love how the guy in the black immediately starts to puke as soon as he turns over to see what the other guy is doing.

[–]costollie 0 points1 point ago

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i love the others guys reaction

[–]kachoww 0 points1 point ago

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I wish I could unsee this.

[–]SeniorWhoopy 0 points1 point ago

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Haven't laughed this hard all day, thank you.

[–]fondupot 0 points1 point ago

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I love the reaction of the guy next to him haha

[–]rendej0 0 points1 point ago

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This is seriously the hardest ive laughed in a long time.

[–]SchpartyOn 0 points1 point ago

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Nice save, bro.

[–]rumbletom 0 points1 point ago

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To win an eating contest why not eat the other contestants? Job done.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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NOPE

[–]ioweyou1 0 points1 point ago

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He looks like a thinner version of Davey Hogan. Wonder if outcome was the same.

[–]Kimano 0 points1 point ago

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And this is why I will never participate in, or attend, an eating contest.

No fucking thank you.

[–]mheard 0 points1 point ago

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Noooooope.

[–]violetxrain 0 points1 point ago

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Now that's determination. Now I know that you can have too much of it.

[–]Lifeinapicklejar 0 points1 point ago

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delicious

[–]Sigfreedsolomon 0 points1 point ago

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an eating contest? what is wrong with you all?

[–]andyRO20 0 points1 point ago

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You must win by eating more than them then throw it up and eat it again. That's how you win at life

[–]deviant2k 0 points1 point ago

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This should be NSFW.

[–]mnells -3 points-2 points ago

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Oooh. I would have appreciated a NSFL tag.

Especially while eating vegetable soup.

-.-

[–]SchpartyOn 4 points5 points ago

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Pizza is great in soup.

[–]Callumlfc69 -1 points0 points ago

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Upvotes to whoever can find the first time this was posted to Reddit.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]suicide_king 3 points4 points ago

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Yeah, come on guys, obviously he sucked the puke into his mouth.

[–]Roast_A_Botch 2 points3 points ago

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Then why would the other guy react before he threw upis he psychic. Also the link to the vid is posted above.

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