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all 147 comments

[–]GALACTICA-Actual 70 points71 points ago

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Trust me; chicks dig space.

[–]larabar 8 points9 points ago

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This is Galactica actual. Authenticate identity with recognition codes immediately.

[–]gibson_ 21 points22 points ago

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I dig your username.

(Not a chick.)

[–]JustCallMeBen 9 points10 points ago

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You dig a username but do not dig not a single female? well... thanks for sharing?

[–]GALACTICA-Actual 0 points1 point ago

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Thanks, man.

[–]MikeRowPhone 240 points241 points ago

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Damn, Hawking, that's a brief history of fine!

[–]Newshoe 105 points106 points ago

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Subtitled: From the Big Bang to Black Holes

[–]my_weird_me 24 points25 points ago

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Big Gang Bang

[–]Immynimmy 12 points13 points ago

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UGH

Upvote.

[–]The48thAmerican 1 point2 points ago

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Principal Lewis! Great TV show.

[–]Immynimmy 24 points25 points ago

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Please don't be photoshopped

Please don't be photoshopped

...

[–]warmtunaswamp 22 points23 points ago

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True Story: I was waiting in line to get into a Vegas night club, you know the line where the bouncer tells you "just 10 minutes and you can go in to meet up with the women you brought that got right in" only it takes an hour. I spot an out of place man in khakis come out of the club exit, right behind him Stephen Hawking rolls out, with at least 1 chick walking out with him. I say "holy shit, it's Stephen Hawking" the other guy in my group that was standing with me recognizes him as well and we have a "it's totally him" conversation like 14 y/o Bieber fans. Other people around us could tell how giddy we were to see him and started looking at him then back at us and asked "who?" It seems the only ones in that mass of people waiting to get into the club that appreciated what we saw was my friend and I, very sad.

[–]c0ld-- 62 points63 points ago

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99 problems.. and he solved every one.

[–]danxmason 12 points13 points ago

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Stephen Hawkin only has one problem... ALS

[–]serialhex 4 points5 points ago

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99 problems and ALS is one

[–]fishbulbx 11 points12 points ago

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I thought he was into black holes.

[–]MightyMorph 50 points51 points ago

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Seriously how many of you would give him a bj or something just so you can say, "i blew Stephen Hawking".

[–]cypherdtraitor 96 points97 points ago

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I blew his dick, he blew my mind!

[–]RupeyDoop 29 points30 points ago

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He mindfucked me.

[–]IJustCantStudy 3 points4 points ago

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I'm a guy and I would wear that shirt every day

[–]Nitro187 17 points18 points ago

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I'm a guy, and that's pretty gay.

[–]IJustCantStudy 4 points5 points ago

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So?

[–]trimalchio-worktime 1 point2 points ago

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CORRECT!

[–]Lots42 44 points45 points ago

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I hope this is not photoshopped because the dude serves that kind of attention

[–][deleted] 56 points57 points ago

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I believe he even carries around a menu from which you can order this.

[–]fmyasitch 5 points6 points ago

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give-me-two-lesbian-spanish-chicks. menu-b-4.

I really hope he does that! :D

[–]LumpyDog 2 points3 points ago

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I'm pretty certain he doesn't carry much of anything.

[–]dalectrics 25 points26 points ago

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Brazzers novelty accounts, calling all Brazzers novelty accounts...

[–]nicholmikey 53 points54 points ago

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[–]bersh 6 points7 points ago

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Smart is sexy.

[–]plexluthor 5 points6 points ago

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Isn't that his daughter?

[–]Colostomy 0 points1 point ago

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Aww yeah.

[–]thelazerbeast 40 points41 points ago

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The greatest mind of the 21st century is in that body.

I really wish we spent less on the military and more on research.

[–]Essar 23 points24 points ago

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A great mind, no doubt. I'm not sure if we can unequivocally state that it is the greatest mind though.

[–]thelazerbeast 32 points33 points ago

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Unequivocally, no. On the Internet, yes.

[–]survivalist_guy 3 points4 points ago

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I don't know - he is pretty much this generation's Einstein.

[–]Essar 13 points14 points ago

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He's an academic celebrity and a great scientist, that doesn't make him the greatest mind though. There are many geniuses which the public never hears of.

[–]Ginnigan 3 points4 points ago

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Yeah, but... his wheelchair's also a helicopter.

[–]Analfucker -1 points0 points ago

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Yep there are many people who never probably got the education, environment, luck required to become a scientist, engineer etc.

[–]tangchi 8 points9 points ago

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"I find myself less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einstein's brain than the near certainty that people of equal talent lived and died in cornfields and sweatshops" Steven Jay Gould

[–]Analfucker 3 points4 points ago

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This quote is just genius. I was thinking something very similar to this quote.

I used to kind of look down on people working in restaurants, rice fields, corn fields, sweatshops etc due to my upbringing. My parents told me if you dont study you would have to do those crappy jobs. Now that I know the fact that some random sweat shop worker might have had greater potential than I would, if only he/she got as much oppurtunities as I did.

A lot of these people just need a chance, an oppurtunity.

[–]Science-Faction 9 points10 points ago

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Nah, he is more of a celebrity scientist. Rating the top 20 or so scientists in the past 100 years and there contribution to psychics and I would be very surprised if Hawking was even on the list to be honest. Leonard Susskind is arguable the greatest mind on the planet at the moment. But then how many people have ever heard of him?

Most people say he is the smartest man ever, because he is the only scientist they have heard of. But based on what he has actually contributed to science he lags far behind a great many others. I'm aware he is in a wheelchair and is limited to how fast he can work, but still, I would not call him the greatest mind of the 21st century, nor compare him to Einstein.

[–]armin8487 0 points1 point ago

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TBH, I didn't know about Susskind until last night. Thanks "Nova"! (television pays off sometimes...) The guy is brilliant. Bet he doesn't get the babes, though.

[–]Science-Faction 1 point2 points ago

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Haha, maybe not. I love how he went from being a plumber to one of the founders of string theory, eat your heart out good will hunting :-p

[–]Irongate 0 points1 point ago

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Is Neil deGrasse Tyson still kicking around here? We should ask him who he thinks the greatest mind is.

[–]armin8487 0 points1 point ago

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He answered a similar question in his AMA: http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/mateq/i_am_neil_degrasse_tyson_ama/c2zg3uw (Question was: Who are the unknown scientists of the 20th Century that people should know?)

[–]dapperdave 0 points1 point ago

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The man discovered that blackholes evaporate.

Think about that for a second.

[–]Essar -1 points0 points ago

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I know what he did. I'm actually doing a PhD in mathematical physics, so although I cannot claim to be an expert, I'm more well-informed than your average member of the public.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Fortunately the military spent a lot on research.

[–]Irongate 1 point2 points ago

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I saw a link recently about the cause of ALS finally having been determined, so it is at least being worked on.

[–]KarlWinslow -1 points0 points ago

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if he's that great why hasn't he fixed himself ಠ_ಠ

[–]thelazerbeast 1 point2 points ago

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True, lazy piece of shit should use science mind power "uncripple!" then scraggle some stuff on a chalkboard.

POOF!

[–]KarlWinslow 1 point2 points ago

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EXACTLY! He's too busy whoring it up

[–]nokstar 25 points26 points ago

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YTMND has forever ruined my image of this man, to the point that I laugh every time I see a pic of him.

[–]Catmouth 2 points3 points ago

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That is fucking fantastic. I can't stop laughing.

[–]mangabalanga 2 points3 points ago

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Valcheck?

[–]THE_StephenHawking 9 points10 points ago

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BETTER THAT THAN WINDOWS 98 PROBLEMS.

[–]Cowardly_Rio 4 points5 points ago

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Its ok I expect downvotes for this because it's political, BUT

Socialized medicine has been good to this man. In turn he has been good to us.

I love you Steven Hawking. Like a brother loves a brother.

[–]rocketbootkid 1 point2 points ago

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Can't ogle tits. Neck doesn't work.

[–]orangeco 1 point2 points ago

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I thought he was stuck in a wheelchair but clearly that's how he rolls.

[–]slackador 1 point2 points ago

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[–]RaveDigger 1 point2 points ago

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I know I'm a terrible person for thinking this, but I can't be the only one, can I?

http://imgur.com/Nj2vd

[–]agentid36 1 point2 points ago

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dr hawking brings all the science chicks to the yard.

[–]bunny1979 1 point2 points ago

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Hmmm...I wonder if that's his daughter and her friend? The guys is a billionaire right? Why can't they be poolside with him:)

[–]Islandre -1 points0 points ago

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I'd be surprised if he's a billionaire from basically one successful book.

[–]bunny1979 0 points1 point ago

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Uhhh..... ಠ_ಠ

[–]Islandre -1 points0 points ago

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Care to elaborate?

[–]bunny1979 0 points1 point ago

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[–]Islandre 0 points1 point ago

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Yes, I know his life story, I've heard him speak about it. They don't pay fellows lots of money in England, there's not a lot of money in academic research. I seriously doubt he is a billionaire.

[–]cruxix 1 point2 points ago

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[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]AdmiralHook 0 points1 point ago

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Yeah, you know me.

[–]FecklessPhilanderer 2 points3 points ago

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This man deserves mountains of the finest pussy this planet has to offer.

[–]Jorru 4 points5 points ago

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poor guy :( he probably cant even get it up

[–]Jorru 2 points3 points ago

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well then this man truly has 99 problems, and getting an erection isn't one

[–]cresteh 21 points22 points ago

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Welp, this got weird.

[–]dezmd 2 points3 points ago

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Well not really, I mean, give the poor bastard his due, he's a goddamn genius. Not saying we need to photograph or tape the experience. Although that would be a very awkward sex tape for TMZ to get their hands on.

[–]nebbish 0 points1 point ago

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Id rather be as clever as him than get sex

[–]EndOnAnyRoll 2 points3 points ago

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If you were as clever as him you would realise how foolish that statment is.

Anyway, the dude's been married twice and has kids. He get's it on...well, maybe not so much these days but he is nearly 70.

[–]cmlowe 1 point2 points ago

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You are one selfless man/woman.

[–]fartlikeaboss 1 point2 points ago

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It's all smiles until you all realize problem #98 was erectile dysfunction

[–]tamper 0 points1 point ago*

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Weekend at Bernie's IV

*edit: too soon?

[–]TheMrNashville 0 points1 point ago

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I love how Steven Hawking always has a smile on his face.

[–]0li 1 point2 points ago

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... I don't know if he's really smiling or he can't help to look like it. Don't want to be insensetive, just wondering...

[–]TheMrNashville 1 point2 points ago

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His mouth/cheeks are the only things he can control, so his smile is intentional. Ever more inspiring to see someone choose to smile when the only options he has are either smiling or frowning.

[–]Islandre 0 points1 point ago

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He smiles more when he drinks so I suspect it is involuntary but not just random.

[–]domdeath 0 points1 point ago

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I cycled past him getting out of a taxi last night!

[–]Colostomy 0 points1 point ago

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Holy shit where were you? I saw him powerlifting at the gym last night in Switzerland!

[–]Punkwasher 0 points1 point ago

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Bitches love science!

Wait...

[–]Avatarous 0 points1 point ago

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Boom sha-ka-la-ka, Boom sha-ka-la-ka, Boom sha-ka-la-ka, Boom.

[–]spikeboyslim 0 points1 point ago

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... I know what you did. Karma whore.

[–]commandodude1265 0 points1 point ago

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General relativity LIKE A BOSS

[–]DependsOnTheLight 0 points1 point ago

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Golddiggers.

[–]DJMunich 0 points1 point ago

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My gf: "Is that Jim Hawking?"

[–]Or0ku_Saki 0 points1 point ago

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[–]Papshmire 0 points1 point ago

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Gave that bitch a daiquiri, bitches love daiquiris.

[–]Tenacity22 0 points1 point ago

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1100011 problems.

[–]snowlion13 0 points1 point ago

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isnt that a form of rape, really hes like "gtf away from me! youll get me in trouble!"

[–]thedemonlover 0 points1 point ago

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That smile says everything he can't.

[–]otter111a 0 points1 point ago

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I love that the one girl is putting up bunny ears behind his head.

[–]nickateen 0 points1 point ago

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Look at that smile.

[–]ma5haga 0 points1 point ago

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Hawking's all about the ladies. I just watched one of his new documentaries about time travel and he said that if he could go back in time he would meet Marilyn Monroe in her prime.

[–]TheKooze 0 points1 point ago

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Seriously?!?! I totally LOL'd!!

[–]lady_lawless 0 points1 point ago

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Okay. I'm going to preface this with I'm not a creeper forever alone, however I know that girl on the right. And she would totally take a picture with Stephen Hawking. Are you, by chance, her husband?

[–]koltran 0 points1 point ago

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What's the opposite of Stephen Hawking?........ Christopher Walken

[–]kablamoh 0 points1 point ago

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But a wheel chair isn't one?

[–]Cristal1337 0 points1 point ago

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Stephen Hawking is my hero since I was small.

[–]DeathWard 0 points1 point ago

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awesome :D I hope one of those girls gave him a good time haha

[–]stop___grammar_time 0 points1 point ago

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Do you think he thinks in the voice he had before he lost the ability to speak, or the computerized voice he's used for so long. I heard that although there are other better artificial voices out there, he sticks with the same one because people associate that voice with him.

[–]vandalcookies 0 points1 point ago

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haha this just made my day.

[–]Bravo777 0 points1 point ago

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That man's a player!

[–]marshwomp 0 points1 point ago

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and black hole thermodynamics ain't one

[–]greenymile 0 points1 point ago

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Obligatory Stephen Hawkings jokes:

Stephen Hawking can finally achieve an erection now that doctors have disabled his pop-up blocker.

Jesus may have walked on water, but Stephen Hawking runs on batteries.

Stephen Hawking masturbating - Now there's a stroke of genius

Stephen Hawking has admitted that, if in great pain, he may consider assisted suicide.

Or "Task Manager", as he calls it.

How does Stephen Hawking ejaculate?

CTRL + V

People think Stephen Hawking is so clever, but when you ask him a question and he is typing in the answer on his little screen, how do we know he isn't just looking up the answer on the Internet?

See, if we ever make contact with aliens and they ask to speak with the smartest human being and we then show them Stephen Hawking, anyone else reckon they'll think we're taking the piss?

[–]probablysarcastic 0 points1 point ago

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somebody tilt his head the other way! That just looks crazy uncomfortable.

[–]CJSg 12 points13 points ago

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[–]Catmouth 1 point2 points ago

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well played sir

[–]probablysarcastic 1 point2 points ago

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Much better!

[–]generalozzman 0 points1 point ago

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99 problems.....and he knows how to solve every single one of them.

[–]gingerjoyce 0 points1 point ago

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It's Pimp-Daddy Hawking.

Someone stole his ride but Stevie's all, like, yo dawg dis science shit is dah shizzle. It gets you all dah bee-yoches!

[–]IJustCantStudy 0 points1 point ago

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IMO humanity should pay for this to happen every day he wants, the badass.

[–]DownvoteAttractor -1 points0 points ago

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Hawking is apparetly quite the womaniser.

[–]0000013800000 -1 points0 points ago

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99 problems and a TWITCH ain't one.

[–]cowbacon -4 points-3 points ago

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I've got 99 problems, but bitches ain't one. ... having sex is tho... =(

[–]spike312 5 points6 points ago

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Actually, no. He can have sex.

[–]Mercury_Milk 4 points5 points ago

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He has three kids.

[–]Mr_Walter_Sobchak 0 points1 point ago

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he's got 99 problems and a twitch aint one.

[–]murfi -1 points0 points ago

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i got 99 problems

and ALS is one

[–]SgtSmackdaddy -1 points0 points ago

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I've got 99 problems, and a lack of functional somatic motor neurons is also one of those problems. Fuckin ALS