this post was submitted on
1,765 points (52% like it)
18,571 up votes 16,806 down votes
shortlink:

pics

subscribe2,624,147 readers

8,478 users here now

For an image subreddit with minimal rules, check out /r/images

A place to share interesting photographs and pictures. Feel free to post your own, but please read the rules first (see below), and note that we are not a catch-all for general images (of screenshots, comics, etc.)

Spoiler code

Please mark spoilers like this:
[text here](/spoiler)

Hover over to read.

Rules

  1. No screenshots, or pictures with added or superimposed text. This includes image macros, comics, info-graphics and most diagrams. Text (e.g. a URL) serving to credit the original author is exempt.

  2. No gore or porn. NSFW content must be tagged.

  3. No personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder. Stalking & harassment will not be tolerated.

  4. No solicitation of votes (including "cake day" posts), posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor, or [FIXED] posts. DAE posts go in /r/DoesAnybodyElse. "Fixed" posts should be added as a comment to the original image.

  5. Submissions must link directly to a specific image file or to an image hosting website with minimal ads. We do not allow blog hosting of images ("blogspam"), but links to albums on image hosting websites are okay. URL shorteners are prohibited.

  6. No animated images. Please submit them to /r/gif, /r/gifs, or /r/reactiongifs instead.

  • If your submission appears to be filtered but definitely meets the above rules, please send us a message with a link to the comments section of your post (not a direct link to the image). Don't delete it as that just makes the filter hate you!

  • If you come across any rule violations, please report the submission or message the mods and one of us will remove it!

Please also try to come up with original post titles. Submissions that use certain clichés/memes will be automatically tagged with a warning.

Links

If your post doesn't meet the above rules, consider submitting it on one of these other subreddits:

Comics  
/r/comics /r/webcomics
/r/vertical /r/f7u12
/r/ragenovels /r/AdviceAtheists
Image macros Screenshots/text
/r/lolcats /r/screenshots
/r/AdviceAnimals /r/desktops
/r/Demotivational /r/facepalm (Facebook)
/r/reactiongifs /r/DesktopDetective
Wallpaper Animals
/r/wallpaper /r/aww
/r/wallpapers /r/cats
The SFWPorn Network /r/TrollingAnimals
  /r/deadpets
  /r/birdpics
  /r/foxes
Photography Un-moderated pics
/r/photography /r/AnythingGoesPics
/r/photocritique /r/images
/r/HDR
/r/windowshots
/r/PictureChallenge
Misc New reddits
/r/misc /r/britpics
/r/gifs Imaginary Network
/r/dataisbeautiful /r/thennnow
/r/picrequests /r/SpecArt
/r/LookWhoIMet
  /r/timelinecovers
  /r/MemesIRL
  /r/OldSchoolCool
  /r/photoshopbattles
  /r/PastAndPresentPics .

Also check out http://irc.reddit.com

a community for
to anything interesting: news article, blog entry, video, picture...
message the moderators

MODERATORS

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

1764
1765

NOL (Nope'd Out Loud) (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by vecycl

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on
top 200 commentsshow 500
sorted by:
best
best
top
new
hot
controversial
old

[–]baaconnn 1656 points1657 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

At least you're in a good place to shit yourself.

[–][deleted] 696 points697 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

There might be another one under the toilet seat.

[–]Changoleon 680 points681 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Not a good time to read this :O

[–]Cloudx77 243 points244 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

not a good time at all!!

[–]kappafox 193 points194 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I had just grown out of the fear of It (the clown) reaching up from the toilet and pulling me down to murder me...

[–]g00dGrief 65 points66 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

his name is pennywise

[–]Gisbourne 35 points36 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

We all float down here...

load more comments (8 replies)

    [–]ThatGuyYouKindaKnow 103 points104 points ago

    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

    WTF is wrong with you?!

    [–]JMaboard 271 points272 points ago*

    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

    WTF is wrong with you?!

    You're oblivious to the fact that a murderous clown is living in your restroom, either in your toilet or behind the shower curtains.

    He's just sulking in your bathroom pacing back and forth waiting for you to stumble in one day, unknowing and tired.

    As you stumble into the darkness searching for the light switch, he grabs and pulls you down to the toilet.

    He, covered in his poorly applied clown make up, whispers into your ear "I've been waiting for this moment." Mr. Clowny then puts your head into the toilet bowl. You feel stinging on your face. He pulls your head up just long enough for you to hear him whisper "mmm lemons"

    He then pulls a cloth sack over your head. You try and reach for help but it's too late, he's already got you cornered. You feel 100's of tiny fangs pierce your face. He then whispers into your cloth covered ear "Those are spiders."

    You think it's over, you're dead.

    But! It's not.

    EDIT: Got bored and wrote something more detailed. Well, now I feel like writing a full fledged short story of this.

    [–]Swisstec 96 points97 points ago

    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

    zip zop zoobity bop

    [–]Punkgoblin 30 points31 points ago

    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

    If it's a reference, I don't get it. If it's just random nonsense, well put sir/lady/thing!

    [–]Westykins 41 points42 points ago

    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

    Bill Cosby, yo -.-

    load more comments (4 replies)

      load more comments (2 replies)

        [–][deleted] 21 points22 points ago

        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

        Plot hole: If he's hiding in the toilet, why doesn't his make-up wash off?

        Unless that's his real face...

        [–]mcderps 23 points24 points ago

        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

        I will never be able to use my restroom the same way...

        [–]jeffAA 14 points15 points ago

        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

        Me neither. I can't wait until next time I need to go... it's gonna be awesome.

        load more comments (1 reply)

          load more comments (35 replies)

            load more comments (3 replies)

              load more comments (14 replies)

                [–]UseThe4s 7 points8 points ago

                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                Looks like I'll be holding it in for a while now.

                load more comments (5 replies)

                  load more comments (7 replies)

                    [–]Metamorphism 276 points277 points ago

                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                    http://i.imgur.com/4HRwY.gif

                    [–]TheSoleWitness 5 points6 points ago

                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                    That's one thing I can't do;

                    I can't have what I've last seen be the last thing I remember :( .

                    [–]mattersmuch 23 points24 points ago

                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                    Haha what a useful GIF!

                    load more comments (3 replies)

                      [–]jdwolfe 13 points14 points ago

                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                      I also fear snakes in the toilet bowl. If we had that man in the bear costume from The Shining, nightmare trifecta would be at play.

                      [–]RossLH[!] 8 points9 points ago

                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                      Defecaloesiophobia. Didn't have it a minute ago, now I do.

                      load more comments (26 replies)

                        load more comments (22 replies)

                          [–]happyphilter 832 points833 points ago

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          Looks like a black widow.

                          [–]NapalmLubricant 417 points418 points ago

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          I'm never pooping again.

                          [–]rbdash 294 points295 points ago

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          Look on the bright side. In a month you can do an AMA!

                          [–]LatinLover69 420 points421 points ago

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          So you're going to become a woman?

                          [–]Special_Redditor 81 points82 points ago*

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          My girlfriend wears a shirt that says "Girls don't poop."

                          EDIT: And no, she's not imaginary.

                          [–]PANCAKETWAT14 44 points45 points ago

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          There she is, wearing it in the picture.

                          [–]xAbaddon 36 points37 points ago

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          Your girlfriend who lives in Canada?

                          [–]AKA_Squanchy 187 points188 points ago

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          Girlfriends don't poop; wives do ...

                          [–]Ectonation 234 points235 points ago

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          Must be why so many of them want to get married.

                          [–]Thorus 79 points80 points ago

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          LOL (Laughed Out Loud)

                          [–]polaroid 23 points24 points ago

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          THANKS (Trembling hands against nice knees syndrome)

                          load more comments (2 replies)

                            load more comments (4 replies)

                              load more comments (1 reply)

                                [–]clothes_are_optional 33 points34 points ago

                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                thanks for clarifying that she's real.

                                load more comments (11 replies)

                                  load more comments (28 replies)

                                    load more comments (1 reply)

                                      [–]Journalisto 370 points371 points ago

                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                      When I was a kid, my buddy told me black widows hang out in outhouse pits and occasionally bite people while they're pooping. I envisioned very sad, african-american women sobbing, knee deep in shit, but I couldn't figure out why on earth they would want to bite a shitting ass. I checked the pits for black, husbandless women crying before using the john for several years until, upon asking my dad, I finally understood what my buddy was talking about.

                                      [–]MasterA6 66 points67 points ago

                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                      The imagination and comprehension of a child's mind, it's amazing and entertaining.

                                      [–]Punkgoblin 77 points78 points ago

                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                      My life was shattered when my cousin came out of the bathroom with a cookie in his mouth. I was told you can't eat in the bathroom, and for some reason took it as a physical impossibility, rather than as a directive. Being 4-6 was weird.

                                      [–]sleeplessone 28 points29 points ago

                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                      I'm picturing you grabbing him on the shoulders, "HOW DID YOU DO IT!"

                                      load more comments (3 replies)

                                        load more comments (1 reply)

                                          [–]ELzed 12 points13 points ago

                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                          Try telling Ol' Gladdys that! I can't get that sad bitch out of my outhouse!

                                          [–]immabluedevil 51 points52 points ago

                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                          Wat

                                          [–][deleted] 61 points62 points ago

                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                          Black: Of African decent.

                                          Widow: Spouse of a deceased husband.

                                          [–]rainman18 9 points10 points ago

                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                          immabluedevil: Whoosh

                                          [–][deleted] ago

                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                          [deleted]

                                          [–]-artgeek- 23 points24 points ago

                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                          It's even funnier knowing that you couldn't of just copypaste'd that! Well done sir!

                                          [–]darmon 10 points11 points ago

                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                          Couldn't have

                                          Couldn't've (how that is spoken more often than not) does not translate to "couldn't of."

                                          The more you know! star whoosh

                                          load more comments (16 replies)

                                            load more comments (2 replies)

                                              load more comments (1 reply)

                                                load more comments (6 replies)

                                                  [–]stuffybear 127 points128 points ago

                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                  yeah you can see the hourglass

                                                  [–]happyphilter 116 points117 points ago

                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                  Holy shit, you're right. I was just going off body shape...

                                                  [–]aelendel 105 points106 points ago

                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                  I confirm, the body shape alone is enough to ID.

                                                  [–]d3rsty 96 points97 points ago

                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                  FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

                                                  [–]Unrelated_Gif 148 points149 points ago

                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                  http://i.imgur.com/gi3Yr.gif

                                                  [–]krugnasty 56 points57 points ago

                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                  Oh you

                                                  [–]ComicFoil 8 points9 points ago

                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                  I just watched The Goonies

                                                  [–]Radxical 21 points22 points ago

                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                  Where..do these things come from?

                                                  [–]lscioscio 20 points21 points ago

                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                  The Goonies? Or are you asking about black widows?

                                                  [–]LeftyLoosey 6 points7 points ago

                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                  Astoria, OR

                                                  load more comments (3 replies)

                                                    load more comments (4 replies)

                                                      load more comments (6 replies)

                                                        [–]Scarbane 13 points14 points ago

                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                        Because that makes me feel better about the situation.

                                                        [–]rowuco 14 points15 points ago

                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                        Black widows look eerily similar to our red-backs.

                                                        [–]Journalisto 28 points29 points ago

                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                        Well, I'm glad they don't look similar to our rednecks.

                                                        [–]rowuco 20 points21 points ago

                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                        Australia will see your redneck and raise you a bogan.

                                                        load more comments (2 replies)

                                                          load more comments (6 replies)

                                                            [–]RotoBone 10 points11 points ago

                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                            You can? Oh, right. I forgot to enhance.

                                                            load more comments (2 replies)

                                                              [–]shadow1515 6 points7 points ago

                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                              My first thought as well. If that happened in my house I would never feel safe again.

                                                              load more comments (18 replies)

                                                                [–][deleted] 229 points230 points ago

                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                I don't need to wipe anyway.

                                                                [–]sarcelle 208 points209 points ago

                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                Looks like I'm taking a shower instead!

                                                                At my friend's house.

                                                                [–][deleted] 194 points195 points ago

                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                "Why do you need to take a shower at my place?"

                                                                "I need to wipe my ass and you don't have spiders."

                                                                "...What?"

                                                                [–]blueasclepius 91 points92 points ago

                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                "Damn it, Ted! Don't argue with me, I'm chafing!"

                                                                [–]loggedout 9 points10 points ago

                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                Ted always was the asshole.

                                                                [–]TedFromTheFuture 36 points37 points ago

                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                aww, come on! :(

                                                                load more comments (4 replies)

                                                                  [–]vecycl[S] 72 points73 points ago

                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                  Y. I can afford to risk some brown striped boxers.

                                                                  [–]dominicanlou 251 points252 points ago

                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                  brown recluse boxers.

                                                                  [–]mtheoryx 129 points130 points ago

                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                  NOPE NOPE NOPE

                                                                  [–]blueasclepius 63 points64 points ago

                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                  NOL

                                                                  load more comments (5 replies)

                                                                    load more comments (5 replies)

                                                                      load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                        [–]HZAres 62 points63 points ago

                                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                        crush the roll with the might of a thousand suns.

                                                                        [–]TheoQ99 9 points10 points ago

                                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                        I feel that may also obliterate the earth. But that's acceptable as you would also demolish every other spider too.

                                                                        load more comments (7 replies)

                                                                          [–]joegetto 192 points193 points ago

                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                          christ, part of me is always afraid there is a spider underneath the rim of the toilet. now this?

                                                                          [–][deleted] 244 points245 points ago

                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                          Well, that's a fear I didn't need added to my life

                                                                          [–]HighSorcerer 138 points139 points ago

                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                          Here's another one:

                                                                          Spiders crawl on you while you're asleep.

                                                                          [–]lengthynewt 418 points419 points ago

                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                          You go to hell.

                                                                          [–]Alecm3327 35 points36 points ago

                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                          It's only 10 and that's enough internet.

                                                                          [–]HighSorcerer 29 points30 points ago

                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                          I'll have you know I've got a condo reserved next to the lake of fire. Upside? While I'm alive, I can do whatever I want because I already know where I'm going when I die.

                                                                          [–]UseThe4s 56 points57 points ago

                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                          They also crawl into your mouth for warmth. Great place to lay eggs.

                                                                          [–]rockerode 18 points19 points ago

                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                          Fuck you, you whore.

                                                                          I need my mommy.

                                                                          load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                            load more comments (11 replies)

                                                                              [–]Askeee 78 points79 points ago

                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                              I set myself on fire before I go to bed, that way I don't have to worry about spiders.

                                                                              [–]wipeout4wh[!] 38 points39 points ago

                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                              Spiders are generally very antisocial animals, and will avoid contact with humans, so that's probably not very likely.

                                                                              [–]teawar 67 points68 points ago

                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                              TIL the average Redditor is a spider.

                                                                              load more comments (12 replies)

                                                                                load more comments (28 replies)

                                                                                  load more comments (3 replies)

                                                                                    [–]NotSoFatThrowAway 87 points88 points ago

                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                    I one time had a spider crawl out from under the rim of the toilet onto my penis.

                                                                                    Edit: Yes, for those asking, I died in the conflagration that ensued. I'm speaking from the beyond.

                                                                                    [–]TheAughtSpectrum 172 points173 points ago

                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                    So you got like 8 hand jobs at once.

                                                                                    [–]NotSoFatThrowAway 36 points37 points ago

                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                    I was just crawling with excitement.

                                                                                    [–]fingerrockets 17 points18 points ago

                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                    I read somewhere that more people were bitten by black widows back in the day from using out houses.

                                                                                    I also have this story.

                                                                                    When I lived in Florida I used to throw my clothing on the floor and often ware it again a day or two later if it was clean. One morning I woke up and had to use the bath room so I threw on a pair of shorts (I had house mates so no nude bathroom runs) when I got to the toilet and started to pull down my shorts a black widow fell from a leg opening. I never jumped so high off the balls of my feet I don't think I could ever recreate that jump of WTF!

                                                                                    Now I all ways pat down or give a good whip snap shake to my clothing if it's been on the floor for sometime.

                                                                                    [–]quincebolis 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                    I do that anyway, now I'm just never going to wear clothes ever again.

                                                                                    load more comments (4 replies)

                                                                                      [–]undercoveruser 61 points62 points ago

                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                      relevant and absolutely NSFL

                                                                                      [–]wtcnbrwndo4u 54 points55 points ago

                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                      This was confirmed fake BTW.

                                                                                      [–]empire_down 43 points44 points ago

                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                      I need to believe you.

                                                                                      [–]TheVacillate 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                      It is indeed fake. If you look at how clear the spiders are versus how clear the surroundings are, the legs and bodies are just a little too sharp to be real.

                                                                                      Which is good. Very good. Still makes me wanna cry.

                                                                                      [–]redittguy 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                      can someone describe the video for the people (me) that don't want to be traumatized?

                                                                                      [–]patheticgrl43 25 points26 points ago*

                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                      A guy is standing in front of a toilet filming it and you can see a big spider sitting on the back behind the rim, and he lifts up the rim with his foot and another one jumps out onto his shoe and he kicks it away. Pretty sure it's not real but definitely terrifying.

                                                                                      Edit:typo

                                                                                      [–]abernathie 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                      I read that several times before I realized it was the guy who lifted the lid, not the spider. Whew - I feel better now.

                                                                                      load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                                        [–]_sentry_ 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                        fuck fuck fuck fuck i'm never going outside again.

                                                                                        [–]zzaman 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                        T_T This takes my pee shyness to another level.

                                                                                        [–]Dr_astr0 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                        I screamed "JESUS FUCKING CHRIST" out loud. Fuck fucking bathrooms.

                                                                                        load more comments (9 replies)

                                                                                          [–]AllegraGeller 37 points38 points ago

                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                          Brown recluses especially like to hide in places like that. The best part about them is that their bites aren't very painful, you might not even notice it. But then, a month later, your ass will have a wound like this on it:

                                                                                          http://images.emedicinehealth.com/images/4453/4453-4474-10729-42553.jpg

                                                                                          [–]bdonk 135 points136 points ago

                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                          I am sincerely begging everyone on this thread to stop posting links.

                                                                                          [–]AllegraGeller 35 points36 points ago

                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                          Well, you probably should be able to identify what a brown recluse looks like. While avoiding it entirely would be preferable, they like to hide in dark places and may bite you when you can't see them (like shuffling through stuff in a closet or something). You need to know it was a brown recluse that bit you and immediately seek proper treatment, or this might be your hand after failing to be vigilant. I'm only trying to help; it's a real danger after all.

                                                                                          Of course, even swift medical attention doesn't guarantee you won't lose a hunk of flesh, best hope it isn't an important one.

                                                                                          [–]Calmwinds 66 points67 points ago

                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                          HOLY FUCK. I DON'T CARE ABOUT TO ECOSYSTEM, EXTERMINATE ALL SPIDERS.

                                                                                          [–]AllegraGeller 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                          We can't stop them from even getting in our shipping crates, much less accomplish world-wide extermination. For instance: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brazilian_wandering_spider

                                                                                          These spiders can also appear in banana crates sent to grocery stores and bulk food centers around the world. One such instance happened in 2005 with a shipment of bananas arriving at Bridgwater, England, when a man was bitten by a P. fera; however, due to quick medical care he survived, taking nearly a week to recover from the bite following treatment.

                                                                                          Something to think about next time you are picking out bananas.

                                                                                          [–]soothfast 18 points19 points ago

                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                          My brother worked in a fruit packing distribution place in the UK when he was a teen. They used to regularly see unusual spiders and other assorted creepy crawlies in the crates of bananas. I can confirm that they killed them there and then with shoes.

                                                                                          [–]whorecrusher 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                          From the Brazilian Wandering Spider article:

                                                                                          Aside from causing intense pain, the venom of the spider can also cause priapism in humans. Erections resulting from the bite are uncomfortable, can last for many hours and can lead to impotence. A component of the venom (Tx2-6) is being studied for use in erectile dysfunction treatments

                                                                                          [–]AllegraGeller 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                          "studied for use"

                                                                                          is that code for "we're having these spiders bite monkeys' dicks... FOR SCIENCE!"

                                                                                          load more comments (2 replies)

                                                                                            load more comments (2 replies)

                                                                                              load more comments (9 replies)

                                                                                                load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                                                  [–]honeycombs 31 points32 points ago

                                                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                  if you're checking this comment to see if you should click that link, the answer is no.

                                                                                                  [–]druumer89 30 points31 points ago

                                                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                  Man, im pretty sure that's just a pizza on his leg.

                                                                                                  [–]ecaward 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                  That guy most likely: waited too long to be treated, and also was severely allergic to the venom.

                                                                                                  I've been bitten by one before, and I didn't notice until the next day. But my leg was red and had mild inflammation, so I went immediately to the doctor. Anti-venom, and I was good to go.

                                                                                                  On the other hand, my aunt was bitten by one in her coat pocket, and she mostly ignored it. A week later she found out she was incredibly allergic to the venom, and they had to graft her entire arm. :/

                                                                                                  load more comments (5 replies)

                                                                                                    [–]caseycour[!] 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                    Always check, man. Always.

                                                                                                    [–]thalescosta 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                    Thanks, i have never thought on any of this and now i will always have to look both the rim and the tp

                                                                                                    load more comments (13 replies)

                                                                                                      [–]DarkLightx19 181 points182 points ago

                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                      Problem solver

                                                                                                      [–]TheAughtSpectrum 257 points258 points ago

                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                      Where can I buy this upgrade?

                                                                                                      [–]dahlkomy 95 points96 points ago

                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                      Any LIMB clinic.

                                                                                                      [–]supergauntlet 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                      You'll need to buy tons of neuropozyne though.

                                                                                                      load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                                                        [–]brocotree 28 points29 points ago

                                                                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                        Go find yourself a hooker, have sex without a condom and then in a couple days it will at least feel like pissing out fire.

                                                                                                        load more comments (3 replies)

                                                                                                          [–]MotharChoddar 18 points19 points ago

                                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                          Gonorrhea

                                                                                                          load more comments (3 replies)

                                                                                                            [–]DJBESO 87 points88 points ago

                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                            Welp, looks like my ass will be crusted with shit for the rest of my days....

                                                                                                            [–]lncontheivable 29 points30 points ago

                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                            If you let that build up for a while, it'd make some good anti-spider ass armor.

                                                                                                            [–]haiku_robot 167 points168 points ago

                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                            Welp, looks like my ass 
will be crusted with shit for 
the rest of my days....

                                                                                                            [–]gesucazzo 44 points45 points ago

                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                            This is the first one I've seen that I really like.

                                                                                                            load more comments (6 replies)

                                                                                                              load more comments (2 replies)

                                                                                                                [–]DoctorIntelligent 27 points28 points ago

                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                Just imagine for a moment. You're sitting on the throne. You glance to your right...a roll of toilet paper. Not bad. Wait...there's two, black leg things on the edge of the roll. You lean in closer. The two black insect leg things pull back into the tube...

                                                                                                                [–]Idicus 73 points74 points ago

                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                Going to the toilet in Australia... Not even once...

                                                                                                                [–]maschwa 39 points40 points ago

                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                The good ole USA isn't too great either haha. I live in the south and last week i found a scorpion in my bathtub. Also we probably find a black widow somewhere in the house or garage once every few months.

                                                                                                                [–]annoyedatwork 20 points21 points ago

                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                How far south? I just wanna know which line of latitude to stay above.

                                                                                                                [–]Nithix 50 points51 points ago

                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                Just move to Canada, son. I'm sorry.

                                                                                                                [–]Fausterion 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                Depends on where in Canada:

                                                                                                                http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_widow_spider#America

                                                                                                                [–]Nithix 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                NO WHERE IS SAFE

                                                                                                                [–]CapitalY 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                Antarctica. Russia? MARS.

                                                                                                                load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                                                                  load more comments (3 replies)

                                                                                                                    load more comments (5 replies)

                                                                                                                      [–]Peastie 42 points43 points ago

                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                      As a person from the Upper Midwest, this might be the #1 reason to fight global warming. Because if we let it continue, the black widows will move up.

                                                                                                                      [–][deleted] 35 points36 points ago

                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                      Black widows all over Montana. It's too late.

                                                                                                                      [–]Peastie 26 points27 points ago

                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                      Ugh, really? I guess it's time for me to move to Yakutsk.

                                                                                                                      load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                                                                        load more comments (2 replies)

                                                                                                                          load more comments (8 replies)

                                                                                                                            load more comments (7 replies)

                                                                                                                              [–]KMartSheriff 327 points328 points ago

                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                              The logical solution.

                                                                                                                              [–]BrendanJB 125 points126 points ago

                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                              Alternatively...

                                                                                                                              [–]KMartSheriff 39 points40 points ago

                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                              I whole-heartedly admit I never knew what that "nuke it from orbit, it's the only way to be sure" meme originated from. TIL

                                                                                                                              [–][deleted] 23 points24 points ago

                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                              If you've never seen the movies Alien and Aliens, do so in that order. They're great. You can ignore the other squeals, they don't really add anything.

                                                                                                                              [–]Vindexus 20 points21 points ago

                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                              Squeals?

                                                                                                                              [–][deleted] 23 points24 points ago

                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                              Ha! Damn auto-correct. I'm leaving it.

                                                                                                                              [–]cottonballOFDOOM 17 points18 points ago

                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                              In space, no one can hear you squeal

                                                                                                                              [–]KMartSheriff 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                              Oh I've seen the films, it's just been a while

                                                                                                                              load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                                                                                [–]ivquatch 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                Avatar was a great movie.

                                                                                                                                [–]ICantReadGood 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                That's the first time I laughed today

                                                                                                                                [–][deleted] ago

                                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                [deleted]

                                                                                                                                [–]rjp0008 238 points239 points ago

                                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                Realistically... [FIXED]

                                                                                                                                [–]MyDruggitAlt 191 points192 points ago

                                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                Dude what if it jumps out when you squeeze? Do you really want to piss it off?

                                                                                                                                [–]Blue_fox_Bandit 21 points22 points ago

                                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                And that is why I never try to kill a spider. I have the overwhelming fear that it sees me coming and just as I get close jumps on me and attacks the shit out of me. I just make someone else do it.

                                                                                                                                [–]DIDNT_GET_SARCASM 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                They do have spider sense. You never can be too careful

                                                                                                                                load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                                                                                  [–]JohnnyCashed 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                  Then you don't even let it know what's coming.

                                                                                                                                  [–]quincebolis 30 points31 points ago

                                                                                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                  You would miss the centre just slightly, the widow would shift and jump out the side, landing on your fist. In a blind spider panic, her jaws would bite down. You would scream, terror like you have never felt before, and shake your hand in mad desperation to get her off, but she would hold tight, pumping the deadly poison into your blood stream.

                                                                                                                                  And then they would find your body in the bathroom with knickers 'round your ankles.

                                                                                                                                  [–]JohnnyCashed 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                  What a horrible way to go. On second thought, just burn the house down.

                                                                                                                                  load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                                                                                    [–]Madmanden 62 points63 points ago

                                                                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                    But spiders are nice. They deserve to live, because they catch and eat those damn annoying flies. And the occasional bird.

                                                                                                                                    [–]randomjew 67 points68 points ago

                                                                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                    I did not want to know that spiders could catch birds. Fuck

                                                                                                                                    [–]spesic 93 points94 points ago

                                                                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                    Yup, this motherfucker...

                                                                                                                                    [–]Patrick_M_Bateman 241 points242 points ago

                                                                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                    WELL YOU CAN JUST COME OVER AND ROCK ME TO BED TONIGHT, YOU MOTHERFUCKER

                                                                                                                                    [–]AltVladC 33 points34 points ago

                                                                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                    Username actually makes that prospect creepier.

                                                                                                                                    load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                                                                                      [–]Tamural 47 points48 points ago

                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                      PIDGEY, NO!

                                                                                                                                      [–]dja0794 17 points18 points ago

                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                      Flying types are super-effective against bug types, that must be one hell of a spider.

                                                                                                                                      [–]mynsc 28 points29 points ago

                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                      WHY WOULD YOU POST SOMETHING LIKE THIS

                                                                                                                                      WHHYYYYY

                                                                                                                                      [–]0ctobyte 23 points24 points ago

                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                      Fuck.

                                                                                                                                      [–]woocheese 45 points46 points ago

                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                      No! Jesus fucking Christ! No!

                                                                                                                                      [–]Courstice 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                      JESUS FUCK IS THAT REAL?!?!!?

                                                                                                                                      [–]ewilliam 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                      Indeed. And that's just a baby.

                                                                                                                                      One of the many reasons I will never go to Australia. Fucking spiders the size of tractor tires that come during the night and steal small children.

                                                                                                                                      [–]TheLoveKraken 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                      I see your small bird eating spider and raise you one that eats FUCKING CHICKENS.

                                                                                                                                      load more comments (5 replies)

                                                                                                                                        load more comments (7 replies)

                                                                                                                                          load more comments (10 replies)

                                                                                                                                            load more comments (3 replies)

                                                                                                                                              [–]Quinnett 27 points28 points ago

                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                              Yeah, like anyone is touching that toilet paper roll...That's just what the spider WANTS you to do!

                                                                                                                                              [–]AltVladC 21 points22 points ago

                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                              If you'd have the guts to do that, you wouldn't be scared of it in the first place. Honestly.

                                                                                                                                              [–]CelestialRose 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                              Nope Nope Nope... All I can see is that spider somehow living through that to be extremely pissed off...

                                                                                                                                              load more comments (7 replies)

                                                                                                                                                [–]eight8 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                you just made me wanna watch aliens..... ( in fact , gonna do that tonight ) , thank you :-)

                                                                                                                                                load more comments (2 replies)

                                                                                                                                                  [–]Kashyyykk 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                  EXTERMINATUS

                                                                                                                                                  load more comments (3 replies)

                                                                                                                                                    [–]backbitting 54 points55 points ago

                                                                                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                    holy fuck, sooo glad i like in Canada.

                                                                                                                                                    [–]shriek 112 points113 points ago

                                                                                                                                                    sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                    wait till we teach those spiders to wear sweater.

                                                                                                                                                    load more comments (15 replies)

                                                                                                                                                      [–]iamdanhi 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                      I'm glad you're on the right team.

                                                                                                                                                      [–]TheLoveKraken 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                      Anyone that does A is a heathen. They probably even stand up to wipe.

                                                                                                                                                      [–]Bertrand_Tussle 37 points38 points ago*

                                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                      Just imagine going to wipe yourself after a satisfying shit:

                                                                                                                                                      You draw out a length of toilet paper—eight sheets, like always—and this mother crawls out from inside the roll.

                                                                                                                                                      For you, time freezes. You're shocked, afraid, would be shitting yourself if you hadn't already vacated your bowls not a minute earlier. After the initial shock-wave of fear you begin to think of your options: you realize that your only hope is to rip the length of toilet paper before the black widow crawls up all eight sheets, and then—just as you begin to feel his legs on the thin flesh just beyond your finger nails—she strikes.

                                                                                                                                                      But of course, time doesn't really freeze. The spider dashes up those eight sheets and onto your knuckles in a split second and bites down into the top of your hand. Almost before you recognize the tickle of her eight legs on your flesh, neurotoxins are coursing through your veins.

                                                                                                                                                      And that's not even the worst of it—whoever finds your body will find you with your pants down and your ass unwiped. They'll try to save you from embarrassment, maybe wipe your dead ass for you and pull up your pants.

                                                                                                                                                      But little do they know what lurks in your left pocket...

                                                                                                                                                      Edit: fixed some typos

                                                                                                                                                      [–]dragons_fire77 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                      This is not r/nosleep!!!!

                                                                                                                                                      [–]Askalad 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                                                                                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                      There is no hope.

                                                                                                                                                      load more comments (5 replies)

                                                                                                                                                        [–]tehpatriarch 36 points37 points ago

                                                                                                                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                        Scumbag Reddit:

                                                                                                                                                        Gives you something to do while shitting.

                                                                                                                                                        Ruins shitting for you.

                                                                                                                                                        [–]DietDoctorGoat 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                                                                                        sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                        I'm reading this while taking a shit. Well played.

                                                                                                                                                        load more comments (1 reply)

                                                                                                                                                          [–]addbeast27 31 points32 points ago

                                                                                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                          This is when you test out your WD-40 fueled flame thrower

                                                                                                                                                          [–]OsamaBeenModdin 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                          One on either end of the roll

                                                                                                                                                          load more comments (2 replies)

                                                                                                                                                            [–]i_live_on_an_island 47 points48 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                            spider to spiderwife: "Honey im goin down to the gym to do a couple hrs on the thread mill and i may do a couple laps in the pool after, see you for dinner."

                                                                                                                                                            [–]RedditsKittyKat 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                            And that's the last time I wiped my ass.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]HAVEANOTHERDRINKRAY 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                            You're a stronger man than I. Black widows are my biggest fear. Brown recluse don't bother me a bit, but when I see one of these fuckers pictured here... I'm liable to pass out on the spot.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]czechreck 17 points18 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                            It's strange you say that, because a Brown recluse bite can be much worse.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]HAVEANOTHERDRINKRAY 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                            I'm aware of the necrosis and such, but for whatever reason I just perceive them as far less likely to bite me.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]Gozdilla 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                            They're less aggressive. Hence the recluse.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]ftc08 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                            Its name is descriptive. They only bite when they are immediately threatened. The bite sucks hairy ass when you have to get part of your leg cut out House style from necrosis, but you're very unlikely to get yourself into a situation where they'll attack.

                                                                                                                                                            A black widow will fuck up anybody who enters its domain. You get your hand caught in its web and she'll go straight for the jugular. Also, it is much more likely to kill you (still unlikely) than a brown recluse, and the suffering isn't localized to one spot.

                                                                                                                                                            [–]mendelrat 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                                                                                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                            It is very, very, very unlikely for a single black widow to kill you unless you're old or an infant.

                                                                                                                                                            No one has died from a black widow bite in >= 10 years.

                                                                                                                                                            load more comments (2 replies)

                                                                                                                                                              [–]Vinyl_Vixen 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                              I think my tarantula only escaped her cage one time. It was terrifying. Spiders are only ok when you know where they are.

                                                                                                                                                              [–]JimBoNZ 29 points30 points ago

                                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                              DO NOT TAUNT TOILET ROLL SPIDER

                                                                                                                                                              [–]royaleavecdufromage 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                              I always lift my feet off the ground when I see pictures like this.

                                                                                                                                                              [–]danomano65 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                              Who else went and looked. Admit it.

                                                                                                                                                              [–]bee_lovely 28 points29 points ago

                                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                              I like the "NOL" idea. I do that often on Reddit.

                                                                                                                                                              [–]arya__stark 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                              Pfft you don't know fear. A house centipede was in there and when I rolled out the toilet paper, it fell in my pants leaving me screaming and kicking my leg like some tribal African dance till it came off. I left the washroom leaking and my pants barely on. This happened to me twice. Two times too many...

                                                                                                                                                              [–]Airazz 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                              Actually, you are very lucky. Just grab the roll and move it upwards quickly, then side-to-side, then spin around a little bit. You'll end up with completely harmless spider purée.

                                                                                                                                                              [–]sharkz 124 points125 points ago

                                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                              This sounds like the worst idea ever

                                                                                                                                                              [–]notquiteswedish 52 points53 points ago

                                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                              Alternatively it'll speed out of the tube and onto your hand.

                                                                                                                                                              [–]GloriousDawn 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                              Please move over there

                                                                                                                                                              load more comments (2 replies)

                                                                                                                                                                [–]reddiculon 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                                pfft, I'm in Australia and I pulled my pants on today only to have a roach climb out and down my legs.

                                                                                                                                                                If this were to happen, I'd probably just make sure there was no spider on each wad of paper as I bunched it up for the purposes of wiping.

                                                                                                                                                                [–]Raphalon 17 points18 points ago

                                                                                                                                                                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                                Balls the size of ostrich eggs.

                                                                                                                                                                load more comments (8 replies)

                                                                                                                                                                  [–]Galaxyhiker42 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                                                                                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                                                                                                                                                                  The only solution is burn the house down.

                                                                                                                                                                  load more comments (563 replies)

                                                                                                                                                                    Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our User Agreement and Privacy Policy. © 2012 reddit inc. All rights reserved.

                                                                                                                                                                    REDDIT and the ALIEN Logo are registered trademarks of reddit inc.

                                                                                                                                                                    π Rendered by PID 29399 on app-79 running 320e81d.